A/N 1: first things first: I have an extra special chapter for you lovely readers today :D in light of my recent decision to forgo smut-writing, midnightwings96 offered her help in filling in the, er, sexy-times blanks of the story. For this chapter in particular, she not only came up with an amazing idea, but also wrote it as well, and I cannot thank her enough for her help and amazingness. More complete note at the bottom, but I just wanted everyone to be aware of the awesomeness they have to look forward to thanks to her :D
As Thor's coronation drew ever closer, Aemilia did her best to adjust to the new turns that her life had taken. The first night after she'd regained consciousness following her ordeal was the worst; each one after slowly but surely settled into what she was starting to recognize as her new normal.
She had been blessed in her young life, until that point, with a lack of true loss. She'd never felt a real sense of grief, never lost anything or anyone that was truly dear to her, and as a result, she didn't quite know how to deal with the heavy and confusing weight that sat in her heart. One of the first things she noticed, however, was that while her days slowly went back to normal as she recovered, everything felt completely different.
She couldn't pinpoint what was different; it was merely a feeling, something akin to looking at the world through a changed set of eyes. Once her strength was restored, she would go about her days as she ever did, and after initial traces of awkwardness, none who knew of her loss treated her any differently than they ever had.
Her physical pain faded with relative quickness. Her deeper pain, however, lingered, and while she learned to deal with it and not allow it to keep her from living and functioning, she knew it would never fade entirely. She'd lost a piece of herself, and she'd feel the echoing hollowness that was left behind until the end of her days.
Most days, she managed. Others, something happened that would spring forth fresh tears. The bewildering thing was, it wasn't always a bad thing. Sometimes it was refreshing to cry and give the dulling pain an outlet.
One of those times, she and Loki were taking a walk through the gardens, during a few increasingly rare moments Loki stole away from palace business to spend with her. Odin was keeping him ridiculously busy these days, and Aemilia wondered if it wasn't purposeful. She didn't think on it though, choosing instead to enjoy the feel of his hand in hers as they strolled under the sun.
They chatted lightly and pleasantly until a comfortable silence settled between them. Their steps stopped in front of the Queen's prized array of magically bred golden roses, the same kind that Loki had once presented Aemilia with when they were still in their initial tumultuous relationship. The roses were exquisite and literally immortal once picked, forever remaining in bloom and never wilting or losing their lustrous golden hue. Aemilia still had hers from Loki tucked away with her other prized possessions in her room.
She glanced up at Loki as he seemed to study the flowers, but she didn't ask why or what was so suddenly fascinating about them. She merely watched as his eyes drifted downward, to the bottom of the bush, and then she became even more curious when he dropped to one knee and reached into the mass of flowers. The sudden glimmer of metal in his hand from a dagger he'd produced out of nowhere only flashed for a moment before he put it to work, cutting a stem free.
At first she thought he was being spontaneously romantic, which was as strange a thought as it was a pleasant one, but when he rose up to his feet and turned to her, the unexpectedly heavy look in his eyes told her otherwise. He handed what he'd cut to her, and she reached out and took it, dropping her gaze from his to look upon it.
It was a single, thornless stem, and at the top was a perfectly bloomed rose, at the height of its beauty. Branching off from the same stem was an equally perfect rose in bloom, positioned just under the other, the only difference being that it was smaller. But it was what lay between them that made Aemilia's breath catch.
On a smaller little branch of the stem, lower than the other two and sitting just between them, was a tiny, delicate rose bud that was completely closed. It had yet to bloom by even a fraction, and now that Loki had picked the stem it grew from, it never would.
Her chest ached when the meaning of it all swept through her, and she looked up at Loki as tears stung her eyes.
Even if they spoke little of what had happened and generally avoided the subject for their own sakes, simply knowing that Loki felt the loss too and hadn't forgotten it gave her strength she hadn't known that she needed. The fact that he could have very well felt relief that the baby was gone, ridding him of a very troublesome burden, but instead felt grief and was moved to commemorate the child in this way - it made Aemilia love him on an even deeper level than she'd ever touched before.
She almost told him so. She may have if the lump in her throat hadn't silenced her as he reached out and took her in his arms.
Times like those, she could hardly believe that this was the same Prince who, only a matter of months ago, was gleefully plotting her "ruin" and would kick her out of his bed as soon as he'd had his fill of her for the night. The same Prince who hadn't known the meaning of the word "gentle", who had been the epitome of royal arrogance and self-centeredness, had somehow become the most important person in her life and now held her as she cried and gave her symbolic eternal roses in memory of the child they'd both lost.
He hadn't really changed, she knew that. He was still arrogant and selfish and would never be a soft, safe lover. She didn't want him to be. What had changed was their dynamic, and it had changed for the infinitely better, even with the loss they'd suffered.
Still, she couldn't bring herself to say the words she wanted to say the most. Instead, she clung to him as he embraced her, sniffing back her tears as she muttered simply, "Thank you."
His nod against her hair was her answer. It wasn't enough, but for now, it would do.
The day after Loki gave her the roses, which was a mere three days before Thor's coronation, he managed to get a day free from Odin's service. He wasted no time in heading for the palace music room, which was where he knew Aemilia would be.
She'd had several new offers in the last few days to sing at more coronation-related events, and she'd accepted them all, which thankfully gave her something to occupy her time. He felt a bit badly for her though, knowing that if his covert plans succeeded - and he was confident they would - none of these events would be carried through. But, either way, it was good for her to be getting back to herself and her usual activities, after he'd had to watch her recover her strength while laying in a bed for days.
He swiftly made his way to the room, and upon finding her amid vocal exercises with the old woman who'd been teaching her her whole life, he strode into the room with all of his Princely arrogance and dismissed every other being in the room with a flick of his wrist and a wave of his hand. All but Aemilia scattered out at once, and she gave him an exasperated look as he joined her in the center of the room, in front of an enormous piano, grinning and looking pleased with himself.
"I'm in the middle of something, your highness," she remarked as he leaned casually on the side of the piano.
"I'm aware," he replied. "I've come to relieve you of your duties for the day."
"Oh?" she raised an eyebrow. "What's the occasion?"
"I think you've been spending an inordinate amount of time confined to this palace and its grounds," Loki replied. "How do you feel about a change of scenery?"
"I suppose it depends on the scenery," she replied, though he could see that her eyes had perked up at his words.
"Well," Loki said, "Vanaheim is having its harvest festival starting today."
Her eyes widened. "You want to take me to Vanaheim?"
He grinned. "I think it's time you had a look outside of your own realm, don't you agree?"
A smile broke out on her face, and it brought such warmth within him to see it. Her smiles were far too few these days, far too forced and far too fleeting.
"Yes! When will we go?" she asked, excitement inflecting her tone.
"Now, of course."
He wasn't expecting her to launch at him and lay a sweet but fleeting kiss on his lips, but she did, and he chuckled at her sudden enthusiasm. Then her eyes suddenly widened again and she all but gasped, "I finally get to take the Bifrost!"
Loki chuckled again, the moment reminding him how much younger Aemilia was than he. In most matters, it was not a significant difference, and she usually carried herself with such maturity that he tended to forget what little experience she had in such areas as travel and world experience. But in moments like these, her child-like, almost bouncy enthusiasm for something as routine to him as taking the Bifrost to a neighboring realm made her charm all the more infectious. He'd take her on off-world trips every day if it meant seeing her real smile rather than the half-hearted one she'd been wearing lately.
"Well, off we go, then," he grinned, taking her hand in his. "Let's not keep the Bifrost waiting."
Aemilia couldn't remember the last time she felt this excited. It was easy to push away the unpleasantness that plagued her mind so often as of late when she was on Loki's horse, clinging to him from behind and watching the rainbow bridge race beneath galloping hooves. This was her first time stepping foot on even the bridge, and it was all so unexpected and instantly fun.
And surely, fun was something that her life had been lacking for some time now.
When they reached the end of the bridge and were mere feet from the Observatory, Loki slid gracefully off the horse first and then dutifully helped Aemilia down, all while she tried not to stare nervously at Heimdall. He was standing where the bridge met the golden floors of the Observatory, hands wrapped around the handle of his rather huge sword as it stood planted before him, and his unyielding gaze was more than a little off-putting to a woman who had never met the Gatekeeper before.
"You look suddenly nervous," Loki noted once Aemilia's feet were safely on the bridge.
"I'm not," she replied. Her voice then dropped to a whisper. "Does he truly see all? As in... all?"
Loki smirked and whispered back, "He believes he does."
Before she could ask for clarification, Loki took her hand and turned to Heimdall with a genial smile on his face. "Good afternoon, Gatekeeper."
"Indeed it is," the deep, rich voice rumbled in reply. Aemilia blinked when his golden-eyed gaze fell upon her. "You bring company on today's travels."
"Yes," Loki said. "Heimdall, meet Lady Aemilia, my... companion."
"I have heard your voice, my lady," Heimdall said, affable for his usual stoic demeanor. "It is good to meet you at last."
"It is an honor to meet you, Gatekeeper," Aemilia said in reply.
Heimdall's gaze flickered back to Loki. "And to what realm do you wish me to send you?"
"Vanaheim," Loki replied, tugging Aemilia's hand as he stepped inside the Observatory and strolled them right past Heimdall.
"On royal orders?"
Loki turned and looked at the Gatekeeper sharply. "Do I require royal orders to visit Vanaheim, Gatekeeper?"
"Certainly not."
With those last words, Heimdall stepped to the platform in the center of the structure and slid his sword down into it. Aemilia watched in fascination as light erupted from where the sword sat, and the roof and walls began to turn - slowly at first, and then increasingly rapidly.
She knew how the Bifrost worked and she knew of other's accounts of traveling through it, but a glimmer of anxiety struck as the moment approached.
"Will this... hurt?" she asked Loki quietly.
"No. But," Loki pulled her hand and suddenly spun her into his arms, "you may want to hold on to me."
She looked at him questioningly and wrapped her arms tightly around his middle just as she felt a magnetic pull that seemed to bloom in her very core before it tugged, and then she was falling.
But the falling sensation only lasted for a heartbeat, and then she realized that no, she was certainly not falling or tumbling - she was flying.
A mad, beautiful rush of colors and light erupted all around her as her eyes opened wide and watched the wonders unfolding all around her. Stars, both big and small and utterly infinite in number, came and went in a blinding blur, and all the while Loki's arms held her close and secure, She thought she heard him laugh as her eyes grew only wider and her jaw dropped only further.
And then, all too soon, it was over. The magnetic pull faded at the exact moment her feet found solid ground again. She swayed instantly but Loki held her upright, and she blinked several times as the Bifrost vanished and left her gazing out into a world that she was seeing for the first time.
"Are you well?"
Aemilia nodded her answer to Loki's question, barely hearing it as she took in her surroundings. They were on a hilltop, a very tall one at that, and if Asgard was a realm of gold, then Vanaheim was one of vibrant green. Everywhere there was green grass, lush trees, rolling hills and land that screamed of fertility and prosperity.
And, between the hills and down a valley, she saw a flurry of activity amid tented stands and other structures, heard faraway sounds of merriment and chatter, and she assumed that it was her first glimpse of the harvest festival.
This was the land that her father - her true father - had hailed from. Half of her blood was Vanir, and it was a surreal thing to now see the land with her own eyes.
"It's beautiful," she said absently, surprising herself when she heard her own voice.
"And you've barely seen it yet," Loki noted, tugging her hand and moving them behind the cover of an enormous tree that sat on the hilltop.
She looked at him curiously as he gently pressed her back against the tree trunk. He merely grinned and then dropped her hand. "There's one last task to be done before we begin."
"And what is that?"
"If we enter the festival as we are now, not only will we garner far too much attention, but the locals will attempt to monopolize me," Loki answered. "You can remain as you are, but I require a disguise."
"Oh," she grinned. "And what disguise will you assume?"
"Well, there are so many possibilities, aren't there?" Loki mused, looking up in mock-contemplation.
"Just... don't change your face," Aemilia said, her tone a bit quieter. "I want to still see you when I look at you, even if no one else can."
He stared at her for a moment before a small smile graced his lips. "All right."
Aemilia then watched in rapt attention as Loki's magic shimmered green from the top of his head to the bottom of his feet. Before her very eyes, his hair curled and turned a dark red. His pale skin became brighter and tanner, and his green eyes became impossibly, strikingly blue, and a thin beard matching the color of his hair appeared on his formerly perfectly smooth skin. His clothes changed too, but she didn't pay them much mind, as she was far too fascinated by how completely different and yet still recognizable he looked.
"... Nine Realms," she muttered in wonder, raising her hand to his cheek and trailing her fingertips over the scruff on his chin.
His hand rose and grabbed her wrist gently, and she smiled as he pressed a kiss to her palm before drawing her hand away. "You're blushing, darling."
"You look good like this," she admitted, with a slightly stupid grin.
"Mmm... enjoy it while it lasts, then," he murmured. "Would you like me to change you as well? Just for a bit of fun?"
It wasn't out of the realm of reason for Aemilia to be recognized by someone while she was here. Beyond being an increasingly prolific singer, her name was only ever more well known since she and Loki had gone public. And being spotted in a neighboring allied realm with a handsome stranger probably wouldn't bring about the most desirable of chatter.
"Sure," Aemilia shrugged. "Why not?"
Loki grinned. "Any requests?"
She thought for a moment, then said, "Actually, I'm curious to see what you'll do with me."
His grin widened and he stepped closer to her. "Well then, let's find out."
Her eyes followed his hand as it glowed green and reached out to grasp a long lock of her hair. He tugged on the end of it and she watched as it grew in his hand, straightened and turned as black as his own natural hue. The rest of her hair followed suit, and then he turned his focus to her face. All she felt was a light tingling through her skin as it became paler, and her eyes felt warm as they changed from green and brown to a full, almost unnaturally vibrant green.
When he was done, he stared at her as if he was trying to figure something out. She opened her mouth to ask what was wrong just when he suddenly smiled and chuckled. "Oh dear. I think I made you into my female form."
She rolled her eyes at him. "You are... ridiculous, Loki. Can I see?"
He laughed as his fingers twitched and produced a small mirror. She grabbed it and looked critically at her reflection, her eyes widening as she half-exclaimed, "I do look like you! What did you do to my cheekbones?"
"I... it wasn't really a conscious thing," he shrugged, still grinning. "I think you look quite beautiful."
"I look I'm like your sister," she replied, turning her eyes back to his. "Keep my hair and skin the way it is, but change the rest."
He sighed with false fatigue and replied, "If you insist."
A moment later, her eyes were a deep chocolate brown and her cheeks were her own once more. She checked her reflection again and then gave Loki a look as she handed the mirror back to him. "That's better."
"Happy to please you, darling," he grinned before swooping down for a kiss.
The sensation of his newly acquired facial hair scraping against her mouth and chin sent her reeling for a moment, and she barely registered being pushed against the tree as Loki kissed her more deeply. There was several weeks' worth of yearning in his every touch, and this kiss was no different.
Only a moment passed before her hands moved to his chest and gently pushed him away, forcing his lips to leave hers. His eyes opened and he looked down at her, breathing heavily after just that one kiss, and the desire warring with self control in his eyes brought forth a prickling of guilt within her.
"I'm sorry," she muttered, looking down at their feet. She felt Loki press a soft kiss to her forehead, and it somehow only made her feel worse.
"It's all right, Aemilia," he murmured softly against her hair. He could say so all day, but she didn't think it was all right that since she'd lost their baby, she could barely stand to be touched for more than a moment before she'd start cringing against her will and push him away. She didn't fully understand why it was happening, and each time she pulled away from him, her frustration doubled. She could only imagine being in Loki's position, but he was doing his very best to appear understanding and accommodating.
"Come on," he said, taking a step back and offering his hand. "You have an entire realm to see."
She nodded and placed her hand in his, willing her thoughts away as they stepped out from behind the cover of the tree and began making their way down the hill.
She'd enjoy this day if it was the last thing she did.
Under the cover of anonymity, Loki and Aemilia strolled their way through the bustling, jovial festivities and made their way from the outskirts to the capital city, where the celebrations were most rigorous. Aemiia soaked in everything, sampling food and browsing fashions and other goods that were displayed on merchant stands, and Loki made a point to tell her random facts about the realm, apparently fancying himself a tour guide for the day.
She saw Vanaheim as being a little less refined than Asgard, certainly not as rich, and a bit wilder - both in scenery and culture. Her eyes widened to near saucers when Loki pointed out a brothel that sat right in the midst of the city, and evidence of poverty occasionally showed itself in the form of beggars that sat on a few street corners. She'd never seen anything like this before, and she suddenly felt far too sheltered and privileged for her own good.
"It wasn't always like this," Loki said, guiding her through the city square. "The war with us hit them hard. They were once nearly as rich as Asgard. But, my mother has made it a point to resume trade and give them a bit of help now that we've had nearly a millennia of peace. It's certainly better than it was a century or two ago. I wouldn't have brought you here then."
For all of their struggles, however, the realm seemed to be doing relatively fine, for the most part. The people were friendly, the goods being sold on the street were of high quality, and the festivities at hand were in full swing. There was singing and dancing at every corner, children laughing and playing, and the resilience of the people spoke volumes of the promise of their future.
It wasn't until they turned another corner and a sharp, infantile cry pierced the air that Aemilia's good mood faltered. Her steps slowed and her eyes followed the sound, eventually meeting the sight of a young mother sitting outside of a bakery shop, holding a little bundle of a baby and shushing the child as she gently rocked her back and forth.
Aemilia didn't realize that she was staring until she felt a gentle squeeze of her hand. She blinked and looked away, glancing up at Loki to find a gentle but knowing look on his face.
"Sorry," she muttered, feeling foolish.
"You've nothing to be sorry for," he replied, twining his fingers with hers and brushing a kiss across her temple as they resumed walking.
The words were nice to hear, but she didn't believe them. After all, she was still convinced that she'd somehow caused the loss of their child, and no sweet, comforting words - even from Loki - would change that any time soon.
Still, she managed to again push the thoughts aside and do her best to fully enjoy the day as it progressed. They walked, browsed stands and humored locals when they made conversation with them, having no idea they were speaking to Asgardian royalty and his renowned singer of a companion.
Eventually, when their feet needed a rest and hunger caught up with them, they snatched up some food from one of the more trustworthy-looking shops and then veered away from the city. Aemilia followed Loki as he steered them towards one of the lower tree-covered hills, and she soon found them nestled under the cover of a tree as they ate in a comfortable silence.
Eating was no longer a battle these days. She no longer had to fight to keep food down or force herself to eat all of her meals, but her week spent doing so left her with a smaller appetite and fewer pounds on her frame. She could tell in the way that her clothes were just a bit looser, and it was a constant reminder of what she'd lost that she didn't want.
"So very quiet today," Loki mused, rousing her from her thoughts.
She looked up at him, taken aback for just a second by his altered appearance, then smiled and shook her head. "Sorry. I don't mean to be such dull company."
"You couldn't be dull to me if you tried to be, little one," Loki smirked back, and she sighed as she set her small plate of food aside.
"Why do you call me that?" she asked, her tone laced with curiosity as she leaned back against the tree trunk. He leaned forward, forearm casually leaning on a raised knee as he regarded her. "I'm not particularly small. I'm of average height. Slender, perhaps, but..."
He chuckled and shrugged. "You're quite small compared to me. I don't know... maybe it was your innocence that inspired the name."
She raised an eyebrow. "My innocence?"
He shrugged again. "If you were royalty, you'd see that innocence isn't something you are allowed to hold on to for long. You may not think yourself innocent any longer, but you truly are."
She frowned a little, unsure of how to interpret his words.
"But I don't want to discuss unpleasantness today," he sighed, leaning back himself against the tree. Their shoulders touched as he eased closer to her. "There will be enough of that to be had in the coming days."
She raised an eyebrow. "Oh? Do you know something that I do not?"
He smiled and tapped her chin with his finger. "I mean generally, silly girl. Besides, if I did, would I tell you?"
She playfully batted his hand away and smiled. "I can't focus when you look like this. It's too strange."
He grinned back and then dipped his head down to nip at her ear. She squealed quietly and pushed him away, smiling and staring at the ginger curls on his head with fascination. She reached up to pluck at one as he watched her.
"You know that in the Midgardians' tales," Loki said, leaning into her touch, "I am a 'fire god' with flaming red hair. This is perhaps the closest I've ever appeared to their perceptions."
She raised an eyebrow, her hand trailing down from his hair and ending up back at the scruff on his face. "Well, I like it. I like your real appearance better, but... this one will do." She was silent for a moment before she asked unexpectedly, "Have you ever considered growing your hair long?"
His gaze instantly became cautious. "Long? How long?"
"Just... longer," she shrugged.
Then she watched as Loki glanced around them, ensuring that they were alone in their little shelter, and his magic glowed as he shifted back to his usual appearance. Except this time, rather than tickling the nape of his neck, his smooth black hair was longer and almost just reached his shoulders. "Like this?"
She bit her lip, taking in the change, and then shook her head. "Longer."
He made a slightly exasperated sound, and then his hair extended down to his shoulders and slightly past them. The ends curled just a little bit, and this time, her eyes widened and she bit her lip again - for a different reason. "Oh yes. That is... breathtaking."
He scoffed, but it was obvious how he relished the almost shy smile on her face. "You are ridiculous, woman."
"No I am not! This... suits you," she smiled. "You are far too... wild and... unpredictable to have such short, respectable hair. This suits you."
He rolled his eyes and then shifted back to his disguise, but the smirk on his face didn't fade. "Would you also have me wear a dress?"
"No, leave those to your father." Aemilia suddenly realized what she said and clapped a hand over her mouth as they both began laughing. "I did not just speak ill of the King to his son."
"Oh, you most certainly did," Loki said, voice dropping down to an almost-whisper as he leaned in close to her. "Just what shall I do with you now?"
His hand brushed aside her falsely black hair and she let out a breathless giggle as his lips pressed to her neck. The hair on his face tickled and scratched pleasantly, and she didn't know whether to pull him closer or push him away, but his hands soon found her waist and maneuvered her to the ground, on her back, making the decision for her.
His lips left her neck as he raised his head to look down upon her. Her fingers threaded through his curls and she sighed as he ran his fingertips over her eyes, leaving them to tingle in their wake. She knew without having to ask that he'd changed her eyes back to her true ones.
"Much better," he murmured before leaning down and catching her lips in a deep kiss. She couldn't help but let out a little moan and pull him closer, one part of her welcoming and craving his touch while the other prepared to recoil and retreat. She tried to focus on his lips, his hands as one gripped her hair while the other ran down her side towards her hip, his tongue as it sweetly slid against her own, but even as that first part of her came to life, the other arose and jarred her back.
She broke away with a gasp, his hair a mess under her fingers, and she was vaguely aware of her mouth babbling the word "wait" over and over as she pushed her eyes shut and tried to breathe. But as she attempted to talk herself up, Loki was already retreating.
"It's all right," she heard him say as he slowly eased his weight off of her, and before she could even register what she was doing, she pulled him back to her and let out a strange mix of a growl and a yell.
"It's not all right!" she snapped, looking up in his bewildered eyes. "Stop saying that! It's not all right, and I am tired of this."
He narrowed his eyes in confusion. "What else would you have me say? What would you have me do?"
"I don't..." she faltered, looking up at him and feeling suddenly foolish. "I don't know."
"Would you prefer I push you rather than patiently wait for you to overcome whatever's holding you back?"
No words left her lips as she stared at him, his blue eyes darkening as he snatched her hands from his hair and pinned her wrists to the ground next to her head.
"I have been on my best behavior, darling, but if you'd rather I simply take what I want, I would be more than happy to oblige." He dropped his lips to her ear as he purred, "And you know I would see that you love every last moment of it."
She shivered at his words, then gave a shudder as he leaned down and dragged his lips over her ear and then on down to her neck, his breath hot against her skin and intent clear as he found the most sensitive spot on her neck and kissed it with a fervor that she hadn't felt from him in weeks.
She was rather sure that she would have let him do anything he wanted in that moment, so desperate she was to shake off the hesitation lurking inside, but all too soon, his lips left her skin and his head raised back up. She breathed through parted lips as her eyes met his too-blue ones, then closed them as he kissed her. It was slow and sweet but just hard enough to tell her exactly how much he wanted to throw it all to the wind and have her where they lay.
"But that's not what you want, is it?" he asked quietly, his warm breath washing over her lips. She blinked, finding the act of thinking to be much more difficult with Loki at this current proximity.
"I just... I want to feel like myself again," she said quietly, watching his eyes soften at her words.
"Tell me how I can help you and I will," he replied. "Name it, and it shall be yours."
She gave him a sad smile and stroked one of his cheekbones. "I wish I knew."
"Then I shall wait until you do," he murmured, kissing her lips one more time before gently rolling to lay at her side in the grass.
She let out a sigh and shifted on her side to face him, placing her hand on his chest as he stared up at the clear sky overhead. "Since when are you such a gentleman?"
He chuckled low in his throat and cast her a sideways look. "You think I've gone soft, darling?"
"Well... I wouldn't have expected such patience and understanding from the arrogant Prince who used to kick me out of his bed every night bruised and barely able to walk."
Her lighthearted words unexpectedly elicited a sober shadow to overtake his eyes as he formulated his response. "I am the same Prince, Aemilia, but... we have certainly changed."
They truly had. She thought of all that had transpired between them, the separation they'd endured, the complications, and now, the loss they'd faced together. It was all a very far cry from the casual and emotionless affairs he'd had before she had come along. She couldn't help but ask her next question. "Do you regret me?"
His eyes swiftly shifted to hers, a sudden fierce gleam in them that made her suddenly breathless. "No. I do not. Not even a little."
She swallowed down a heartfelt and impassioned proclamation of her love that was suddenly trying to claw its way out of her throat, and to keep from saying anything else she'd regret, she closed her eyes and laid her head upon his chest. His arm encircled her, nearly instantly, and his hand on her back drew her closer to his warmth.
"Thank you for this day," she murmured into his shirt. His fingers trailed gently through her hair, and she kept her eyes closed as his voice rumbled comfortingly into her ear.
"You're welcome, little one."
To her surprise, Aemilia napped for a solid hour in Loki's arms as Vanaheim's daylight came to an end. She awoke to soft kisses on her neck and a voice wafting through her ear, telling her to wake up and take a look at the festival below.
She blinked away the sleep and glanced up at the sky, finding it dark and lit only by moonlight, and her jaw dropped a little as she tried and failed to remember falling asleep in the first place. "How long have I slept?"
"Not long," he replied softly, sitting up as she did the same. "Only an hour or so. Now look at the city."
She did, and a faint smile crossed her face. The city square was lit by endless torches and pretty hanging lanterns, and the dancing she'd seen earlier had nothing on that which was happening now. Lively, drum-heavy music filled the air and carried over to the hills as the people danced and celebrated with a fury that could have rivaled Asgard itself, and that was truly saying something.
"We could return home," Loki murmured against her ear, and her skin tingled against the warmth of his breath. "Or we could stay a bit. Have a dance or two."
Aemilia smiled and turned her head towards his, eyes flickering down to his lips as she replied, "My mother taught me to never turn down a gentleman's offer to dance."
"And what of arrogant Princes?" Loki grinned, throwing her earlier words back at her.
"Oh, a lady especially never turns those down," she teased before sweetly pecking his lips and getting to her feet.
With clasped hands, they walked down the hill and through the trees, making their way towards the flames and dancing strangers. It was true that while the last month of Asgard had seen endless celebration in Thor's honor, here Aemilia felt a freedom she didn't feel there. Here, she and Loki were disguised, and nobody was watching them or speaking of them. Here, they could be anything they wanted, do anything they wanted, and the thought was utterly freeing.
Her determination to have fun and forget led her to turn and face Loki as they reached the edge of the crowd. She smiled at him and held his hands tightly in her own as she stepped backwards into the fray, and he followed with a mischievous grin that made her pleasantly nervous.
Now that they were in the thick of it, Aemilia felt the pounding of the drums in her chest and the dizzying beat of the wind instruments and foreign music as she wrapped her ears around it. Asgard was not without its own vibrant and more upbeat music, but this was rather different, and hearing it with her own ears in the midst of the realm itself was a far cry from leaning of it in her old music classes.
At some point, as they began to move through the crowd, Loki had taken her hand and began to lead her through it, trying to find an open pocket. The air was hot from the sheer amount of bodies and the air was smoky from the lanterns all around, and combined with the fast, lively music pounding louder and louder in her chest, she was dizzy by the time Loki turned to her and brought them to a stop.
She looked up at the smirk on his face and then glanced to the left and then to her right, suddenly realizing the way in which the Vanir were dancing around them. Her mouth fell slightly agape and she shouted over the music, "What sort of dancing is this?"
There was no space, no distance between the couples as they moved, and they moved rather... suggestively, if she had to put a word to it. Even late at night in the palace, when the Queen and King were long retired and the celebrations began to grow openly drunken and raunchy, she'd never seen dancing quite like this.
"Allow me to show you," Loki grinned, gripping her hands tight and pulling her close, but not quite close enough to touch his chest.
She watched his hands as they rose and placed hers on his shoulders, close enough to his neck that both of her thumbs rested on the curve of it, and his eyes never left hers as he then ran his own hands down her back. They stopped on her hips, and then her breath caught as he gripped and finally pulled her against his chest.
"Follow my lead," he whispered directly into her ear, and she shivered at his sudden proximity. "And remember... nobody knows who you are... or who I am." One of his hands then rose to the back of her neck, and a single finger trailed from it down her spine, all the way back to her hips, leaving a trail of warm energy that she instantly knew to be his magic. The sensation calmed her, leaving her feeling as loose as she would after two sizable cups of wine.
She glared softly up into those bright, false blue eyes and said, "That wasn't fair."
His grin widened, and she gasped aloud at the sudden roll of his hips against hers. Her grip on his shoulders tightened and his lips were suddenly at her ear again. "Just trust me, darling."
Before she could process any words out of his mouth, he pulled her impossibly closer, and then they were both moving to the ever-louder beat of the drums. Her body was pressed tightly to his but she kept her head craned slightly back, trying to watch and understand how he was swaying and moving. This was incredibly new and odd, and despite his calming charm, her brain was working feverishly to try to figure out how to competently dance with him in return.
She couldn't help but squeak a little in surprise when his hands on her hips tightened and then spun her so that her back was to her chest and she was staring into a sea of exuberantly dancing Vanir couples. She shuddered at the gentle nip of his teeth at her ear and then heard him say, "Don't think, Aemilia."
She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. He was right. Clearly, judging by the couples surrounding them, the secret to dancing this way was not to follow any sort of step or really any pattern at all - the secret was just to feel, and let your body move as it pleased. It was still strange and highly foreign, but Loki had never led her down any unknown paths that she didn't thank him for later.
She opened her eyes and let out a sigh as one of his hands held her close by her hip, while the other ran up the length of her hand and traced its way to her elbow. He took it lightly and raised her arm up, settling her hand on the back of his neck, and she took a handful of dark red curls in her fist in response as he began a slow, easing rhythm with her.
She kept her eyes closed, not wanting her view of the other couples to influence her movements, and she simply focused. She focused on the music, on Loki's touch, his hands and his hips and his mouth as it wandered along her neck. She relaxed into his arms and leaned her head against his shoulder, and before she knew it, she had fallen into rhythm with him in the strange dance. It was intimate and odd and she fought a blush every time his body pressed softly against hers, but she couldn't deny... it was rather fun.
He picked up the pace, as if he could sense her growing confidence, and she found herself briefly wondering how many times he'd danced like this before, and with whom. The thought prickled unpleasantly at her mind, and to banish it, she tilted her head back so she could look Loki in the eye. His gaze locked with hers instantly, and then she pulled him down for a kiss that was far more aggressive than her usual fare. The growl she felt rumble in his chest into her back told her of his appreciation, and they continued to dance as he deepened the kiss.
Just when she was about to break away for a desperate gulp of air, a drunken reveler crashed into them - more specifically, into her - and the spell was figuratively broken. The man ended up falling backwards after the impact, which hadn't caused her the least bit of harm, but Aemilia had to snatch Loki's hand back when he outstretched it towards the man with a growl, as if ready to begin a brawl in the middle of the crowd.
She turned in his arms and wrapped hers around his neck as the man scampered off, kissing him soundly to distract him from his sudden anger. "I was just getting the hang of this," she half-shouted over the music. "Don't ruin my fun now."
He glared at her a little, but she smiled and set her lips to a part of his neck that she knew would make him shudder. When he did, she took his hands and placed them back on her hips, then picked up back where they left off, urging him to follow. His answer was to pull her back by a fistful of her hair and kiss her with a fury as he took the lead once more.
She thought that all was well, and her inhibitions were dropping steadily as he grew more open and possessive in his touches. But then, as they danced forehead to forehead, the unmistakable sensation of another mouth on the side of her neck made her gasp in surprise and cling closer to Loki while whipping her head around to see who in the world would dare to just kiss the neck of a woman already quite occupied by another. Her jaw dropped at what stood before her.
There, smiling softly and almost reassuringly for her was Loki - if Loki had short, smooth blonde hair and bright blue eyes, and liked to dress in odd, olive-brown colored clothing that didn't look like it belonged on either Asgard or Vanaheim. Despite that, though, he had the same face, and Aemilia tore her eyes away to give Loki an incredulous look.
"What in Valhalla's name are you -"
She was cut off when the copy suddenly had his hands at her sides and pushed against her, effectively smushing her between the two reflections of the same man. Caught between two chests and suddenly under the weight of four hands, she looked up at Loki in alarm while he merely grinned.
"Relax, darling," he murmured in her ear while the blonde version of him kissed down her neck again. "This is hardly the first time you've dealt with two of me."
She couldn't fight her blush this time, nor the shiver brought by the flick of a tongue on her neck from the man behind her. "That was... that was... in private," she stuttered.
Loki laughed, and she looked around slightly nervously as both men began moving back to the rhythm of the music. Nobody was paying attention, or even glancing in their direction, and she reminded herself that even if they did, they wouldn't know who they were.
She sighed in defeat and decided to just go along with it. She suspected Loki had boxed her in like this to prevent other men from stumbling upon her, whether on purpose or not, and really, she shouldn't have been surprised.
As the three settled into their dance, Aemilia found herself in a bit of sensory overload. The synchronicity and rhythm between them was flawless, but the stifling heat mixed with the overwhelming beat of the music was bordering on too much with the added sensations of two men - well, two of the same man - sucking and kissing opposite sides of her neck at he same time. She lost track of whose hands belonged to whom and could barely register what they were doing, so in a fit of overstimulation, she pushed them both away from her, just enough to catch her breath.
She took the opportunity to have a moment to herself, dancing without the aid of Loki or his double, and in fact ignored them both as she let herself get lost in the strange music. She felt eyes on her as she moved, and she knew who those eyes belonged to. It served to embolden her further, following Loki's advice one more time and turning off her mind, letting her body take the lead and follow the music as it pleased. But Loki could only keep his hands off of her for so long, and soon he was gripping her waist and pulling her back against his chest.
Now standing with her back to Loki and facing his blonde copy, she narrowed her eyes on the rather innocent looking double and leaned back slightly against Loki as his arms wound about her waist. "What is he wearing?" she half-yelled towards his ear.
"Ah, that would be a Captain's uniform," Loki replied. "From a land on Midgard called England, if I recall correctly. " When Aemilia merely looked up at him with a look of bewilderment, Loki explained, "I once had quite the adventure there. That was my cover."
"And what is this?" Aemilia asked, reaching out and touching the tie on the Captain's neck. The copy smiled at her touch and came a step closer, leaving little room between them.
"That is a necktie," Loki answered with amusement, keeping up a more casual dance behind her and watching the eye contact between herself and his copy. "Hmm. You like him."
Her hand closed around the knot of the tie and drew the copy closer. The copy smiled and brought a hand to her cheek, and she smiled back as she replied, "I do."
"Kiss him, then," Loki whispered in her ear.
"You mean kiss you," she replied, though her eyes stayed on the Captain as she spoke to the man behind her. "Since he is still you."
"He's a shade of me," Loki answered. "Now kiss him."
She wanted to remark on the odd things that apparently gave Loki a thrill, but instead she grabbed the copy by his tie and pulled him in for a kiss. He kissed her more sweetly and kindly than she was used to, and it sent shivers down her spine as she melted into the kiss. The shivers became a shudder when Loki pressed his lips to her neck and brought her right back to sensory overload, and on some level, she registered that she wasn't even technically dancing anymore, but rather being ravished publicly in a foreign land by two gorgeous shades of one man.
"You are so beautiful," the blonde copy murmured against her lips.
"You truly are," Loki agreed against her ear, nipping at her lobe as he did.
As she fought to keep her eyes from rolling to the back of her head, she decided that this was shaping up to be one of the better days she'd ever had.
Really, Loki couldn't have hoped for a better end to their little off-world adventure. His entire goal in bringing her to Vanaheim and showing her a good, frivolous time was to see her smile and do what he could to help her regain a sense of herself following what had so recently befallen her. And now, as he held her hand and led her away from the festivities and back to the Bifrost site, she leaned on him and giggled unforced and unstrained, and it was music to his ears.
"I take it you had a good time," he said quietly, glancing down at her and watching a grin tug at her lips.
"I may have," she replied playfully.
"I'm glad," he replied, in complete sincerity. Everything he'd done today, even the disguises and the doubles, had all been for her, all to see a real smile on her face and hear a real laugh from her breath. He hoped that she knew that.
All too soon, they had reached the place in the forest that they had come from, and after Loki led her to stand in the center of the designs left by the Bifrost, he smiled and turned her to face him with his hands on her shoulders.
"Back to our usual faces, I'm afraid," he murmured, drawing a hand to her face. As he cupped her cheek, his illusion fell from her features, leaving him staring at a woman he preferred to any other, real or imagined.
His own disguise fell effortlessly, with just a blink of his eye, and he watched as Aemilia smiled at the return of his true visage.
"I was serious about your hair," she remarked, reaching to him and running her fingertips gently through his straight black hair. "You really should grow it."
He rolled his eyes and snatched her hand from his hair, giving her a gentle yank and pulling her snug against his chest. "Just hold on to me, woman."
She smiled, and he briefly smiled back before looking skywards. They were gone in a flash.
The Bifrost hadn't held much of a thrill for him for many, many years, but feeling Aemilia clutch him tighter and laugh as they hurtled through space was enough to take him back to his earlier, more innocent years. She had a habit of doing that, of making him feel things he'd either never felt or hadn't felt in far too long.
When their feet hit the floor of the Observatory, Loki loosened his hold on her and looked up at the Gatekeeper, smiling jovially at the man.
"Back already?" Heimdall asked, leaning on his sword and appearing to be in a fine mood.
"Indeed we are," Loki replied. "How fare the other realms tonight?"
"Peaceful, as they should be," Heimdall replied. "I was instructed to inform you that the King requests your presence in the throne room upon your return."
"Very well," Loki replied, making his way towards the door of the Observatory. "Thank you, Heimdall."
From there, it was mostly a silent affair back to the palace. He thought Aemilia may have even begun to nap with her head against his back as they rode across the rainbow bridge and through the city, and he realized it would have been the second time that day that she had fallen asleep on him. It may have seemed like an inconsequential thing, but it was not lost on him that not only was she the first woman he'd allowed to sleep in his bed, but she was also the first woman to ever feel comfortable enough to slumber on him like this.
Once at the palace, he gently woke her and sent her on her way to her chambers with a kiss before setting out for the throne room. It wasn't unheard of to be summoned by the King at this relatively late hour, but but when it happened, it was rarely anything pleasant, so he was in no rush to get there.
When he did eventually reach the room, he approached it by way of a side entrance used only by the royal family, but stopped short outside of the doorway when he heard familiar muffled voices speaking his name.
He heard Thor's voice first. "... But Father, what is the purpose of me learning this? Is this not what I have Loki for?"
Odin's rather displeased-sounding voice came next. Loki pressed his back to the wall and squinted as he listened. "Did I not choose you as my heir, Thor? Did I not conclude that you were the son worthy of ascending to the throne?"
"Yes, but -"
"As King, you must fulfill and carry out each of your duties and pay them equal respect and attention," Odin continued. "Loki will be your advisor, nothing more. I chose you to take the throne, not he. I will not see you delegating to him the responsibilities you do not care for."
"But he is far better suited to diplomacy and these... tedious affairs of state, and -"
"If that were true, my son, then it is Loki's coronation we would be celebrating, not yours."
Loki stared at the floor, wondering why after all this time, such words could still cut so deeply. It had been many years ago, centuries even, that he'd accepted his place as second choice. The dream to have the throne was long dead, long extinguished under the shadow that Thor cast over him, so why did it still feel like a dagger slipping smoothly between his bones to hear these words now?
Shaking his head slightly and doing his best to cast the thoughts from his mind, he drew himself to his full height and made sure his footsteps were loud enough to alert his father and brother to his impending presence as he walked the short corridor to the throne room. When they came into view, he smiled and erased any potential hints that he's been eavesdropping.
Not that they'd care.
"Father, Thor," he greeted with a nod. Both men were standing beneath the steps leading up to the throne, facing one another. Thor looked annoyed and Odin looked exasperated. Loki tried not to smirk. "You wished to see me?"
"Yes," Odin said, turning towards Loki. "You have been diligent in your preparations to lead the Council, yes?"
"Of course," Loki replied. "I am well prepared to relieve Lord Ivarr of his duties, Father."
"I wish for you to study under him a bit longer," Odin said. "He will remain in his post as chief advisor through the transition of power, and you will take his place when you are ready."
Loki stared at Odin perfectly blankly, unable to believe what he'd just heard. In disbelief, he glanced at Thor, who looked just as displeased with this news as Loki was.
"But... I believe that I am quite ready now -"
"My decision is final," Odin replied. "You will sit on the council daily following the coronation, and you may use this time to prove your readiness to Lord Ivarr."
Lord Ivarr, Loki inwardly seethed. The man was an ancient relic from the days of Odin's father, as old as he was irrelevant, and he was as fond of Loki as Thor was of libraries. Loki didn't see him giving up his power until the day he died, which Loki thought really should have been eons ago, but the man simply wouldn't do the realm a favor and die.
"Father," Thor said, "I would much prefer to have Loki as my chief advisor than -"
Odin turned to Thor and interrupted him swiftly. "When you are King, it is within your authority to appoint advisors as you wish. However, you are not yet King, and I believe that Lord Ivarr should guide you through the first years of your rule. A wise King heeds the wisdom of his predecessor."
And with that, Loki knew the conversation was over. Odin swept from the room and left the two brothers standing before the throne - one of them a lovable idiot deemed worthy of rule who would drive the realm to ruin, and the other apparently so unworthy of any power that he couldn't even be trusted to lead his own brother's advisory council.
"For what it's worth, brother," Thor said as Loki stared once again at the floor, "I don't agree with this. I want you as my chief advisor. I'll make it so when I am King, regardless of what Father says."
Loki glanced up at Thor, trying to find some warmth in his words, just the smallest bit of comfort to take the edge off of the anger starting to bloom within. But he knew better. Thor only wanted to keep him close to serve his own interests and whims, not because he truly valued his advice or thoughts. Thor would ask for his help when something was too complicated or confusing for him to understand, and the rest of the time, Loki would toil in futility, forever powerless, forever overlooked, never enough to truly matter. Even in the eyes of his own father.
Loki gave Thor a short nod and turned to leave the room. "I'll see you in the morning, brother."
As he walked out of the throne room and his feet began taking him towards Aemilia's chambers, he felt an odd sort of freedom in his anger and frustration. The guilt that he'd been ignoring and pushing down was now utterly gone, and he had never been more confident in his decision to wreck the coronation. At the very least, it would delay Asgard's fall. At best, it would provide him an opportunity to at last prove to Odin that he was worthy, and every bit Thor's equal.
There was no room for guilt when it came to doing what was necessary. Odin had always made sure to stress that to both of them. And this was the very definition of necessary.
He arrived at Aemilia's door long before he expected to, and he stared at it for a moment in slight confusion before placing his hand on the handle.
He wasn't sure when she had become something of a refuge for him, but as he closed his eyes and tried to leave his anger behind before entering her room, it certainly felt as if that was exactly what she was.
Quietly, he opened the door and stepped inside. The room was only half-lit, and his eyes swept through it before landing on the bed. He let a small smile touch his lips as he closed the door behind him.
She was asleep, half-tangled in her thin white sheets, wearing only a white silken slip. His steps were silent as he made his way to the bed, his mind filling with far more pleasant thoughts than those that had plagued it since hearing Odin's words to him.
Acting on instinct, he sat quietly on the edge of the bed, near her feet, and ran his eyes over her sleeping form. The hem of her slip had risen haphazardly up around her thighs, and she was holding her spare pillow in her arms as if to cuddle it. She looked peaceful, content, and he was about to get up and ready himself for bed when a soft little whine escaped her slightly parted lips and made his eyes snap back to her face.
She'd had her share of nightmares as of late, understandably, and he assumed that in a moment he would be waking her from one. But then her legs moved slightly, and she whined again, and he furrowed his brow as his eyes drifted to her lower body.
Her legs moved again, her knees bending, and her hand's grip on the pillow in her arms visibly tightened. Then he watched as her entire body shuddered, and he didn't need to hear the soft moan leave her lips to realize that she was far from in the clutches of a nightmare.
He couldn't help but grin slightly and keep watching, wondering what she would do next. Her movements were very slight compared to how she moved in the midst of the real thing, and it brought forth a myriad of memories in his mind that made him want desperately to create new ones. He had been doing his best to be patient, and he understood her need for space in the wake of the guilt she carried despite her innocence in their loss. But, there was nothing he wanted to do more than give her what she deserved, what she wanted despite what was holding her back. It was getting more and more difficult for him to wait, and exceedingly difficult to watch her continue to punish herself for something she never could have stopped.
The soft, bewitching sound of his name leaving her lips was his undoing. Knowing that she was dreaming of him and dreaming of his touch made him have to close his eyes and steady himself, before he lost his already-thin control and did something she wasn't ready for.
When he opened his eyes, he kept them on her flushed cheeks as he slowly brought his hand to trail up her leg, from her ankle up to the dangerously high hem of her slip. He watched her carefully for signs of waking, but all she did was whine again and rock slightly against the sheets.
He felt acutely awake, every nerve in his body lit and aware as he reluctantly took his hand from her leg and gently slid himself upwards on the bed, so that he was sitting closer to her middle rather than her feet. He watched her face carefully, letting the tip of one finger trace her cheek before he gently placed his palm over her temple, fingertips in her hair, and closed his eyes. He simply had to know what she was dreaming.
Images immediately flooded his mind in a rush that left him breathless. It was of them, their bodies writhing and slick with sweat, not a scrap of fabric between them and the pale moonlight washing over them. His hands slowly grasping, teasing, lips just barely grazing her heated skin. Her hands desperately clutched at his hair like a lifeline, already so close to completely unraveling without him even touching her where she wanted him most. Despite the desperation in both of them, though, it was all very slow, with a passion that couldn't be rivaled.
"Loki, please."
Her quiet plea snapped him from her mind, and suddenly he was again standing above her as she dreamed of what she clearly longed for so desperately, yet unable to withstand the undeserving guilt that also came with his touch.
Loki froze when she suddenly moved abruptly, releasing the pillow to lie completely on her back, but relaxed when her eyes did not open.
His control a moan away from snapping, he couldn't help but stare at her breathtaking form. Her hair circled her face in a wild mane. Eyebrows slightly furrowed, her berry lips opened slightly to take in a shaky breath. He swallowed hard at the sight of that treacherous slip moving farther and farther up her thighs and her heaving breasts so clearly visible under the thin silk. His painful desire was escalating to the point where he no longer could ignore it, and he shut his eyes in his frustration, holding onto the final miniscule thread of control he had left.
His eyes snapped open with a fervor when an idea flashed through his mind, and his lips pulled up into a devilish smirk at his cleverness. He could give her exactly what she - no, they wanted - without her ever knowing. At least, not until it was too late for to even comprehend what had transpired.
With a silently recited spell, Loki concealed his body from Aemilia's sight.
Experimenting, he gently ran a finger down her cheek and over her plump bottom lip. Her body shivered in response, but she remained asleep in her passionate dream. He lithely moved above her, settling his knees between hers.
Then his hands continued their journey, through her hair, over her shoulders and arms, across her lean stomach. When his fingertips just barely grazed the sides of her breasts, she gasped in response, clutching at her sheets.
As Loki slowly became more confident in her slumber, he began to delicately kiss every inch of revealed skin. He lightly nipped and licked at her neck as his hands completely cupped her breasts through the silk, rolling her sensitive peaks under his thumbs. A deliciously loud moan escaped her open lips and Loki smiled in return. This amazing woman had never been more beautiful than she was in that very moment, and his heart swelled in the love that he had just recently recognized.
He gently kissed her lips, and she seemed to follow his touch as he pulled back before her head hit her pillow again in sleep. His attention was pulled from her face when he felt the lace hem of her slip between his fingers.
Moving down her body, finely peppering her skin with kisses, he slowly pushed her slip up to her hips and her legs farther apart, revealing her glistening need for him. Loki nearly groaned as his desire strained painfully against his pants, and he almost considered using his hand before stopping himself. He was doing this for her; he could tend to himself later. He glanced upward to appreciate her pleasure-filled face and heaving chest for a moment before gently running his lips across her inner thighs, breathing her in.
And then his mouth was on her with light kisses and deliberate yet gentle flicks and caresses of his tongue. He made sure to do it in a way that would guarantee a slow and powerful build that would only awaken her until she was too far gone to see anything. He relished in her taste as her moans grew louder and more desperate, and by how her voice picked up in pitch and how her stomach clenched, he realized she was closer than he first thought.
An undeniable need to watch her as she came undone under his ministrations overtook him, and he replaced his mouth with his fingers before moving back up her writhing form to witness her undoing. His skilled fingers brought her higher and higher, and just before she released, she awoke with a gasp, eyes flying open to see nothing but the ceiling of her room, despite the fact that Loki was mere inches from her face. Just as he predicted, she was too far gone to truly comprehend anything, and his fingers quickly brought a deliciously powerful release that had her writhing uncontrollably and exclaiming his name over and over to Valhalla.
Loki watched, utterly transfixed and almost shaking himself, only removing his fingers when she had rode out every wave. Her body slumped back onto the bed, still gasping for air, and he could see the obvious bewilderment in her eyes.
Testing the boundaries of her discovering he was actually there, he lightly kissed her neck and up to her ear, she shakily gasped in surprise.
Yet again, Loki's need to proclaim his love to her swept over him with an intensity that shocked even him, just as he was about to vanish to his room to leave her in her confusion.
His heart was beating out of his chest as he tried to rein it in just as he had before, but all of a sudden he found himself delicately whispering into her ear as his eyes burned with emotion. "Aemilia," he said, his hand just ghosting over her cheek as he pulled back to stare into her wide, unseeing eyes, "I love you."
And then, he left her gasping in shock, confused and eyes filled with tears she couldn't explain. He reappeared in his room, heart racing and unable to believe what had transpired.
A/N: Before I ramble about anything else, I have to thank and gush over midnightwings96 some more :) Seriously, I can't thank her enough not just for her contribution to this chapter, but to the countless ones she's made to this story in total. I dont know what the story would be without her and her help - it probably wouldn'to exist at all, actually - and I continue to be happily in her debt :D Ok, now that I've gushed somewhat sufficiently... Sorry about how long this update took. I was busy, and then I had motivation issues, but deciding to take generous liberties with the chapter and basically put Aemilia in a Henry V/Captain Nicholls sandwich, suddenly the motivation was back. Lol! I'm way too jealous of my own OC. Seriously. Just... ugh. Anyway. Big hugs and thanks to everyone who's reviewed, faved, followed and read the story. I hope this chapter makes up for the wait, and I'll do my best to get the next one out with less of a gap. Love you all, and don't forget to show midnightwings96 some love in the reviews if you liked the ending! :D