I walk with Gale to the cafeteria. We have the same dinner schedule. We are about to walk in the door, the smell of food overwhelming me, when I hear his communicuff beep.
"Dinner will have to wait. They need the two of us in command." I try to collect myself as we walk toward the room.
No one notices us when we walk through the door, they are all gathered around the television that airs the Capitol broadcast. Plutarch sees us and waves urgently for us to join them. We move forward until we are mixed with the crowd. Plutarch gently grabs my arm and pulls me up with him. I can't imagine how this could be of any concern to me. The television lights up and I see Caesar Flickerman preparing to give an interview. The imagine is almost entertaining. Until the camera pulls back and I see who his guest his. Peeta. I hear a sound, a combination of gasp and groan. The same kind that comes from being drowned in water, deprived of oxygen to where you're at the point of pain. I can only assume the sound came from me. I push everyone aside until I'm in front of him. My hand placed on the screen. I search his face for any sign of hurt or torture, but I see none. He looks healthy, I can't connect him to the bleeding boy who haunts my dreams most nights.
I miss the introductions, but hear Peeta say something about a plan. That sentence catches my attention and I listen closely to what they are saying.
"I think we all know what you had planned, Peeta. To sacrifice yourself in the arena so that Katniss Everdeen and your daughter could survive," Caesar says to him.
"That was it. Clear and simple. But other people had other plans," Peeta says. Had he guessed how we had been used? How they had planned to rescue me from the beginning? How Haymitch had betrayed us, in more ways than one. I notice the lines that have formed between his eyebrows. He has either guessed or been told. But he has not been killed or punished and that is more than I had allowed myself to hope for.
"Peeta, tell us about that last night in the arena. Help us sort out a few things."
"First off, imagine what it felt like in that arena, all around you jungle. The giant clock ticking away your life. Promised to be greeted by a new horror every hour. Sixteen people dead, some died trying to defend you. The way things were going, the last eight would have been dead by morning. Save one, that will be crowned victor. And your plan is that it won't be you." I break out into sweat, my hand hanging limply at my side. I was more than thankful that Rose was safe with Prim and not around to see me like this.
"The rest of the world," he continues. "becomes distant. Everything and everyone you loved and cared for most cease to exist. The only reality you are left with are the tributes who want your blood, just to spare their life. No matter how bad it makes you feel, no matter what monster it creates of you, you're going to have to do some killing. You only get one wish in the arena and it's very costly."
"It costs your life," Caesar agreed.
"No. A lot more than your life. To murder innocent people? It costs everything you are. Katniss could barely sleep after our first games." A hush had fallen over the room. "You hold onto your wish, hers was to save Prim, our daughter, and me. That last night, yes, my wish was to save Rose and Katniss. I didn't know about the rebels, but it still didn't feel right. Everything seemed to complicated. I was regretting not running off with her and Roes earlier in the day, like what she had wanted. At that point though, there was no getting out of it."
"Too caught up in Beetee's plan," Caesar suggests.
"Too busy playing allies with all of the others. I let them separate us. I let Finnick try to calm Rose down when she started crying. I never should have let them separate us. When they did, that's when I lost her. I lost Katniss and then I lost my daughter."
"When you stayed at the tree, and she and Johanna Mason took the coil to the water."
"I didn't want to! She didn't want to! But we couldn't argue with Beetee without giving it away that we were about to leave the alliance. The wire got cut, everything went insane. I only remember bits and pieces. Finnick leaving to try and protect Rose. Trying to find Katniss. Brutus killing Chaff. Me killing Brutus. I heard her calling my name. I was trying to get back to her. Then the lighting struck the tree and the force field blew out. "
"You've seen all the footage, Peeta. Katniss blew it out."
"She didn't know! She had no idea what she was doing. None of us could follow Beetees plan! Her only thoughts had to be of trying to find Rose and me. We had a daughter we had to think about! There weren't just twenty-five tributes that had entered that arena. There were twenty-six. One of those tributes was our daughter. Our daughter who was just a couple days old! Katniss wasn't thinking. In the footage it's clear she didn't know what would happen. You can see her trying to figure out what to do with the wire!"
"All right, all right. It just looks suspicious, that's all," Caesar says to him, "As if she was part of the rebels plan all along." Peeta quickly rises to his feet and leans right into Caesars face, Peeta's hands on the arms of Caesars chair.
"Really Caesar? It was part of her plan to get pregnant? It was part of her plan to get reaped again? It was part of her plan to have Rose in the arena? It was part of her plan to have to try and protect another human, who was defenseless, as well as herself? It was part of her plan for Johanna to almost kill her? To be paralyzed by the electric shock? To trigger the bombing?" I've never heard him well like this before. "She didn't know! Neither of us knew anything except that we were trying to keep each other and our daughter alive!"
"I believe you, Peeta. So, what about you mentor, Haymitch Abernathy?"
"I honestly don't know what Haymitch knew."
"He could have been part of the conspiracy. Correct?"
"He never once mentioned it to me or to Katniss."
"What does your heart tell you?"
"I shouldn't have trusted him."
I know that I'm shaking. Nothing seems real anymore. I try to run through my list, but everything is too scrambled together. Haymitch. I want to ask him what he knew, have my own question answered, but I haven't seen him once since the hovercraft, when I had attacked him. He's in seclusion until he's dried out and suitable for public display. I lost all sympathy for him though, the moment I found out he had deceived us.
"We can stop now if you would like," Caesar continues.
"Is there more to discuss?" Peeta answers wryly.
"I was going to ask about your thoughts on the war. However you seem too upset."
"I'm not too upset for that," Peeta faces the camera. "I want everyone watching to lay down your weapons. Think about what this war could mean. We almost went extinct fighting each other before. Our numbers are fewer now. Is this what we want to do? Kill ourselves off completely?"
"So you're calling for a cease-fire?"
"Yes, I'm calling for a cease-fire."
"I think that wraps it up. Back to our regularly scheduled programming."
I can't form a straight though. I hear endless chatter behind me. Words being thrown around, the accusations against Peeta building. Since I cannot do anything, join in or counter the rebels outrage, I decide to leave. As I'm exiting, one of Coins men lay a hand on my arm.
"You have not yet been dismissed, Soldier Everdeen." I jerk my arm free and take off running down the hall. I quickly go to my room and sit on the bed.
"You're alive," I whisper. Nothings clear in my head. Peeta is alive. He defended me. He knew I was trying to save him and Roe. He was trying to save Rose. Peeta is alive. Peeta is also a traitor.
My name is Katniss Everdeen. I am seventeen years old. My home is District 12, there is no district 12. I was in the Hunger Games. I escaped. I was in the Quarter Quell. I had a daughter, Rose. We escaped. The capitol hates me. Peeta was taken prisoner. He is alive. He is a traitor but alive. I have to keep him alive.
My door slides open. Gale walks in, blood streaming from his nose.
"Gale! What happened?" I pull the end of my sleeve over my hand and reach up wiping his nose.
"I got in Boggs way," he shrugs then winces. "Watch it!"
"I'm sorry," I pat his nose, trying to be gentler. "Who is he?"
"The one that tried to stop you," He puts his hand on top of mine and moves it carefully away from his face. There was more blood than before streaming out.
"You fought with him? Really Gale?"
"No. I just blocked him from following you. His elbow hit my nose."
"You know that Coin will punish you," I sigh.
"She already has," he holds up his wrist to me, "She took my communicuff."
"I'm sorry, Soldier Gale Hawthorne." He wraps his arms around my waist, pulling me close to him.
"Don't be, Soldier Katniss Everdeen." He gently presses his lips to mine, then pulls away due to the blood flow.
"Maybe we should let my mom look at your nose. I have to go get Rose anyway."
"It's just a bloody nose Catnip. Nothing serious. I already spoke to your mom. Prim and her are going to keep Rose tonight, she saw the broadcast." I let myself relax against him in his arms for a moment, laying my head on his shoulder. I pull back quickly though and take off my shirt, forming it up into ball and gently pressing it to his nose. I can feel his eyes on me.
"I only took my shirt off to clean off your nose," he laughs a little and moves my hand away.
"Look, no blood," he takes the shirt and throws it in the corner then presses his lips to my forehead.
"So, Soldier Katniss Everdeen, Peeta may have done a lot of damage tonight. The cease-fire is clearly Snow's idea, but it sounds so reasonable coming out of Peeta's mouth."
"I know he doesn't believe that. Why do you think he said it?"
"He was probably tortured or persuaded. Honestly, my guess is he made some type of deal to protect Rose and you. If Snow let him present you as the innocent confused new mother who had no idea what was going on when she was taken prisoner by the rebels, he'd mention the idea of a cease fire. This was if the rebels lose, there's a chance at innocence for you, and a life free of treason for Rose." He looks at me and then slowly begins. "Katniss... he's still trying to keep Rose and you alive."
I search Gales eyes for any sense of annoyance or hurt, but there is nothing. He was just stating a fact. I feel my face grow red, my eyes fill with tears, and my body tense in Gale's arms.
"There can't be a cease-fire. We can't go back."
"I know."
"Peeta is wrong. I don't care what his reason was for saying it. He's wrong."
"Katniss, I know." I'm not even listening to him.
"He doesn't know about what they did to 12! If he could see it! If he could have seen the ground. If he could have seen what was on the ground."
"Katniss! I am not arguing with you. If I could kill every last soul working for the Capitol, I would. No hesitation." He holds me in his arms and kisses the top of my head. "The question is, what are you going to do?"
What am I going to do? I need to keep Rose safe and away from Snow at all costs. I need to keep Prim safe. I need to keep Peeta alive and unharmed. I need to keep Gale safe. What am I going to do?
"I'm going to be the Mockingjay."
(A.N. I know I stuck more to the book in this chapter, but I felt like his interview was crucial and I wanted to try to keep this part as close as I could, while letting the story play out my way. I know most of you probably hate me for last chapter, but I promise you, this story is going to end in a way that will please everyone (hopefully). I also apologize for such a long wait, the past chapter gave me some serious writers block! But I will try to update as much as I can from now on! Love you all and as usual message me if you think of something that might fit in to the story. I'm open to all suggestions.)