Sonic and Bubsy sat on a couch, making out, as any hedgehog and bobcat would do. Our blue blur unzipped the prince of Throbability's pants.

"I just reached a checkpoint, you know what that means?" Sonic quipped, attempting to disguise his cold touch. Regardless, Bubsy wasn't feeling it tonight. Another night went on with our feline pretending that Sonic's arm was still warm to the touch. Another checkpoint, another round of blue spheres. "Come on bud, what's wrong?"

Bubsy went to slap his throbbing cock in retaliation, but it retreated back into Sonic's netherrealms before he could land it. Sonic's voice intensified. "You can't even land a hit? That's a new low. At least hurting me would have made me feel something for once!"

After a slight pause, Bubsy finally broke the silence. "You know something, Sonic? You're starting to sound a lot like Shadow right now," he screamed. "I can't even look at you the same way I did when you held me in your arms as I died."

"Damn," Sonic whispered to himself, as Bubsy stormed off to his shelter. Frozen, the hedgehog sat slumped on the couch and turned on some Chao News. During a report on the latest Batnik roundup, the news anchor was handed a shocking announcement.

"This just in, there has been sightings of a liquid life form travelling through Station Square. Be cautious, its water will burn your flesh off and freeze your brains. All residents in the Tri-City area are advised to remain indoors until the entity is caught. Stay tuned to our station for live updates." The reporter slammed the prompt on his desk and started crying excessively. The broadcast cuts, prompting Sonic to switch channels. Every station's reporting the same thing: water based entities rampaging through the city, somebody must stop them, blah blah blah. It doesn't matter. After all, Sonic just thought of something horrible. Something rather horrible. It had been three years since the incident that crippled Sonic ruined his sex life, and now, with his heart broken and the city in chaos, he wipes a single tear and spin-dashes outside.

He spin dashes back inside. "Whoops, almost forgot my precious." He runs back out, carrying his ex fiance's precious Desert Eagle. Outside Sonic's apartment, everything seemed pristine. The sun's shining, the air smells fresh, but still, a broken heart stands tall over the sunflowers. Sonic weeped at the beauty of the outside world, and, holding the gun with his robotic hand, aimed it towards his skull. "The world may be in shambles, but this is a beautiful image to go out on," Sonic muttered. He could practically taste the lead already. However, before he could bite the dust, the all familiar sound of two tails swishing in the wind drowned any thought of suicide.

Tails descended in front of Sonic's house. With a smile on his face, he greeted Sonic nonchalantly. "Hi Sonic, long time no see! What have you been up to?"

Sonic jumped at the sight of his friend. "Tails! Long time no see! Well, I was just in the middle of killing myself, and…"

"And?"

"Well, you showed up."

"Well glad I prevented you from comitting suicide. What's going on, buddy?"

"It's Bubsy. He's been on my ass lately, and not in it! It's all because of this stupid robotic arm, isn't it?"

"Yeah, if I wanted to fuck some scrap then you may do the trick…"

Sonic aimed the gun back at his head. Tails was quick to stop him. "No, I didn't mean it like that! I meant, like, the robotic hand doesn't turn him on. He needs some real tender arms to cuddle him."

"Don't you know how hard it is to replace my arm?"

"No, but I could try. I do have my sources."

Suddenly, storm clouds appeared over Sonic's apartment, and it started flooding. Tails smiled. Sonic barged back inside. Tails grabbed a little jar out of his backpack and collected some rain before running inside.

Sonic was weeping on the couch, crying on a pillow. "Oh, how the world's most beautiful medicine be tainted with your science." Tails ran up to him with the jar. He sat on the couch with Sonic and showed him the jar.

"Pay attention to the water. See it moving?" Tails asked.

"Yes, water does that" Sonic dryly quipped.

"No, for my hands are far too still, and the air's far too still for it to move like that naturally. Its… Chaos…"

"Aaaaahhhhh!" Sonic yelped. He smashed the jar away, but the entity stuck together despite it clearly exceeding the force needed for water molecules to dissipate. "Preposterous! Show yourself, Chaos!"

Tails smiled, seeing Sonic grow increasingly frustrated over the waterform. "Well, glad to see you back to your old self!"

"Old self? No, I'm still incredibly depressed over Bubsy's uncalled for slander. In fact, I may sue him for emotional damages!"

Bubsy overheard this and the following slam! But what he heard next may actually be the start of a descent into madness, far greater than what inflicted the blue blur's mind all those years ago. "Well as they always say, if you can't beat them, then beat them!"