Lok had had no idea that it was possible to feel as bad as he did now. Shocked though he was at losing his lightsaber for one month, the shame and guilt he felt were even stronger. He had never messed up so badly in his life; nor had he ever been in this much danger or, more importantly, in a situation where his actions had the potential to truly endanger others. Sure, he had always been taught that disobedience during a mission was a no-go, but so far this had always been a rather academic, mind-the-rules-or-you-will-be-punished kind of affair. This time, actual lives had been at stake, not only his own, but also Flynt's. The idea that he might have prevented Eeth and Lakhri from properly looking after Flynt was a lot more painful to Lok than the thought of his own death; like many teenagers, he could not really imagine himself dying.
"I will make better choices the next time," he promised Eeth in a subdued voice. "I'm sorry, master. Really."
"Good," said Eeth, his face unmoved. "You will be a lot sorrier before this is over, though. Go and fetch me the cane."
Lok had a sinking feeling in his stomach, but he could not honestly claim to be surprised. By now, he knew that Eeth always used the cane in serious cases of disobedience, and if anything was a serious case of disobedience, then this was. Besides, he had never seen Eeth as angry as he had been after having brought Lok back to the ship; that fact alone would have clued him in to the fact that some serious punishment was in his future. True, the anger had abated and by now, Eeth projected nothing more than sternness and determination through their bond, but that was more then enough to fill Lok with trepidation.
Reluctantly, but without uttering objections he dragged his feet to the cupboard that held Eeth's infamous collection of spanking implements and took out the cane. Eeth, in the meanwhile, had dragged out a chair from the dining table and beckoned him over.
"Bare your bottom and get over my lap," he ordered, accepting the cane and laying it onto the table behind himself.
Lok frowned. Surely Eeth could not cane him while he was over his lap? This probably meant he was in for a spanking before the actual caning, and that was something he did not at all look forward to. However, for once, he felt that he could hardly argue. If he had ever deserved a punishment, it was this one. And he was under no illusion that it was going to be a light punishment. Still, that did not mean he had to enjoy the prospect; it was with some reluctance that he pushed down his pants and underpants and bent over his master's lap. The position was awkward since Lok was fairly tall, but Eeth somehow always managed to keep him in the position that guaranteed utmost exposure. Today was no exception. Lok was pushed forward so much that his nose nearly touched the floor, and then his masters large and iron-hard hand crashed down onto his bottom without preliminaries.
"This is for your gross disobedience and for breaking your promise to me," Eeth informed him and let a second swat follow that had Lok flinch and bite back a yelp. "We will talk about your recklessness and disregard for your safety later."
That did not sound good. Jedi padawans had to handle dangerous weapons on a daily basis, and consequently Jedi masters tended to take a very dim view on any kind of behaviour that posed unnecessary risks to their charges' health or lives. Lok knew that, and if Eeth planned to punish him separately for this, his prospects were not good. He had no time to ponder this, however, because Eeth spanked so hard and fast that the pain in Lok's bottom soon made coherent thought a virtual impossibility.
Lok had, by now, learned that not all of Eeth's spankings were alike. None of them was ever mild in any sense of the word, but there were occasions on which he wanted to leave an impression, and then there were occasions on which he wanted to leave a strong impression. What he was doing now was in a league of its own; he obviously wanted to leave an impression that Lok would still remember on his deathbed, or so it seemed to the boy who was soon howling, kicking and begging for his master to stop. Eeth did not seem to care about Lok's pleas, however; he continued until Lok was lying limply over his lap and crying. After what seemed like an eternity, the spanking stopped, but Lok had hardly registered that fact when he found himself pulled upwards and bent across the back of the chair.
"Master, p-please," he brought out, unable to fathom receiving a caning on his already blazing bottom. "H-hurts!"
"I know," said Eeth, his voice sounding entirely unmoved. "Remember this when you ever again feel the temptation to disobey me during a mission. I DO NOT WANT YOU TO, and I mean it."
Lok badly felt like informing his master that this was more than abundantly clear by now and needed no further reinforcement, but he knew that this would be pointless, at best, or make his punishment even worse. And it was going to be more than bad enough as it was.
Lok had been caned by Eeth once before, over having deceived numerous teachers in order to get out of doing his homework, and it had enabled him to fully understand Eeth's decision to reserve the cane for the very worst offences. It just hurt like nothing else. When Eeth administered the first stroke now, however, he realised two things. The first one was that, however bad the pain seemed in hindsight, the memory of it never did justice to the real thing. The second one was that when Eeth had caned him over that incident, he had been holding back. Now he did not, or a lot less so. Lok let out an ear-splitting howl and tried to snap up from his bent-over position, but his master, having anticipated this, had used the Force to restrain him; it was like moving against a rubber barrier. Lok could have broken through with a real effort, he knew that from experience, but of course he was not expected to. He slumped back across the back of the chair and took the rest of the dozen strokes that his master had decided to deal out, yelling his throat hoarse because the pain was worse than any he had ever felt before. He had experienced a few pretty severe punishments throughout his padawanhood, from Master Jerad as well as from Eeth, but they all paled in comparison to this; and later, when he was forced to meditate about it, he realised that this seemed entirely appropriate because nothing he had done before had been as serious as his disobedience during their mission.
Lok remained slumped across the chair long after Eeth had stopped, literally wailing. After quite a while, he noticed a comforting hand stroking his back and leaned into it unconsciously; it calmed him down a little and he stopped his wailing, opting for quiet sobbing instead. After some more time, Eeth pulled him up and into a hug. Lok leaned into his chest gratefully, soaking his master's robes with tears and (yuck) snot, but thankfully, the man did not seem to mind.
Finally, Eeth detached himself from Lok and put two fingers under his padawan's chin, tilting his head and forcing him to look his master into the face in what Lok had come to recognise as a very characteristic gesture.
"Padawan, we are not quite finished," he said solemnly. "This was for your disobedience and the fact that you broke your promise to me. I want you to meditate on these things for half an hour. After that, I will consider the slate clean in that regard, and I will offer you a certain amount of healing. Which will leave us free to talk about the inadvisability of taking unnecessary risks to your health and life."
Lok groaned. He had more or less expected the meditation because he had by now learned that however much his bottom hurt after a punishment, Eeth would still order him to meditate on it. But he rather thought that the spanking and caning he had just received, plus the loss of his saber, were punishment enough. He saw no real need for a separate "talk" on recklessness. However, he remembered a previous occasion on which he had tried telling Eeth that his punishment was "a bit over the top," and that had not gone over well at all. In the worst case, uttering such a thought would just add to whatever Eeth had in mind for him.
"Alright, master," he therefore said in resignation, groping for a handkerchief in his pocket. Before he could find one, Eeth held one out to him. He waited until Lok had blown his nose and then said gravely: "One thing I have to point out to you before you meditate, concerning your disobedience, is that I have informed the Council of it. In light of your exceptional circumstances, they refrained from taking formal disciplinary action. But if there is any further instance of serious disobedience during a mission, you will have the Council to answer to, and that will not be pleasant. You will most certainly be put on probation and will receive a formal punishment. If I were you, I would try hard to avoid such an occurrance."
Lok sighed. "You did have to rat me out, didn't you?" he said. It was not a serious question, not really, but the glare that Eeth levelled at him made him shrink back.
"Hey, calm down, it was a joke!" he said hastily, raising his hands in self-defence.
"Well, I do not appreciate jokes about matters of life and death," Eeth replied coolly.
Lok could only just suppress the urge to roll his eyes.
Lok opted for meditating standing up because his bottom felt as if it was about to fall off of him; in fact, he was surprised, when he touched it gingerly, that there was no blood. It was hard for him to find his focus, but he finally did because he knew that Eeth would accept nothing less from him. When Eeth released him from the ordeal after exactly half an hour, he heaved a sigh of relief and readily lay down on the couch, bottom up, so that Eeth could take away the worst of the pain. And Eeth really did nothing more than that; by the time he was finished, it was not excruciating any longer, but there was still a dull ache and Lok knew that sitting was going to be rather uncomfortable. Obviously, his master wanted for the lesson to stick, and Lok did not think he could argue about that.
Thankfully, Eeth did not point him to a chair at the table, but to a soft armchair when they were done; this, Lok could just about manage. He sat down slowly and gingerly and looked at Eeth warily. The Jedi took the sanctity of life very seriously. Jerad had always been extremely unamused when Lok had taken unnecessary risks, and obviously Eeth was no different – especially since, as Lok had to reluctantly admit to himself, it had been quite some risk that he had taken on Mahau,
Sure enough, Eeth fixed him with a stern look and said: "Padawan, what made you think that it is in any way acceptable to throw away your health and even your life? You could have easily been killed. For no good reason."
"Well, my reason was that I wanted to protect your life," Lok said emphatically. "And Lakhri's and Flynt's. They aren't worth less than mine, are they?" He really thought this was a valid argument. He could understand how he had made the wrong decision, that he should not have disobeyed, that he should have had more trust in Eeth, and that his actions had been dangerous, but his motives, he thought, had been selfless – and wasn't it alright to risk one's life in order to save others?
"Padawan, none of us needed you to save us," said Eeth acerbically. "We needed you to stay put, which would have made saving all our lives easier on everyone involved. I grant you that sometimes, it is necessary to take risks for a greater good. This was not one of those cases. And since you are not yet mature enough to tell the difference, you will kindly refrain from risking your life until I explicitly tell you to. Even when I do that, though, I will be very unlikely to ask you to employ Force-control techniques that you have not reliably mastered yet. If I ever again catch you doing things that you are not cleared to do on your own, I will put you under my permanent observation like a toddler until I feel you have gained a little more maturity. And I mean it."
Lok could not help himself. "Have you ever said anything that you don't mean?" he asked.
Eeth's eyes narrowed.
"I rarely do," he said coolly. "This, however, is an issue that I take more seriously than any other because I do. not. want. to. lose. you. Am I getting through to you at all?"
"Oh, so now you think that you can control my fate and prevent me from dying?" Lok retorted, a hint of bitterness in his voice. "Doesn't always work out that way, you know. You need no more than a stupid virus to come along and… OUCH!"
He was suddenly pulled up by an ear and found Eeth's face inches from this.
"Don't you dare bring your former master into this," Eeth snapped. "You know perfectly well what I'm talking about. I'm talking about the need to avoid unnecessary risks to your safety. This is a lesson that you urgently need to learn, and I am more than willing to teach you. So, you will be spanked every night for a week, right after dinner. After which you will write lines on a topic related to your safety and the sanctity of life. Followed by one hour of meditation on that topic. After the week is over, we will repeat this talk and I will want to hear some insights then, or we can easily continue this until you understand exactly why I do not encourage recklessness in my padawans."
Lok shrank back from the fierceness in Eeth's voice and look - well, not much, because Eeth was still clamping his ear in an iron grip that hurt quite a bit. Force, he's freaking mad! he thought in consternation. By now he definitely thought that his punishment was completely over the top, but Eeth looked as stern as Lok had ever seen the man, and Lok did not think it was a good idea to protest.
"You're not going to start tonight, though, are you?" he asked in a small voice.
Eeth released his hold on his ear, but he did not look particularly mollified.
"Oh, I am definitely going to start tonight," he said grimly, folding his arms across his chest. "It is barely the middle of the morning, after all. By tonight, your bottom will be sufficiently recovered for a reminder concerning the kind of behaviour I expect from you. And do not look at me like that. If you think that I am exaggerating, remember that it was you who brought yourself into a situation where you had to use Force-enhanced running in the middle of a war-torn city and smashed head-first into a speeder wreck at maximum speed. I know that at your age you might be unable to imagine your own death, but you are very, very lucky to be alive. The next time, you might not be as lucky. And therefore, there will be no next time if I have any say in it."
For once, Lok had was at a loss for words. He suddenly found himself blinking back tears. And then, for the second time this morning, he was pulled into a strong hug and his tears were soaking Eeth's robes.