Thank you to everyone who is reading this story, whether it be this new version or the old one. Thank you for the kudos as well. It's a lot going back over your past work and revisiting it over a decade letter. Life changes how you see things.
If I owned High School Musical, Chad would have been with Sharpay by HSM3. Or Ryan. Chad's last name would've ended up Evans regardless. I still don't own any Disney IP. Technically we don't need these disclaimers any more thanks to the excellent work of A3O, but they're fun. Oh, the old days. I feel so old.
Chapter Three: How to Lose Your Roommate in 48 hours or less
August 17, 2008
Josh Rodriguez was a 23-year-old fifth-year senior with a double major in computer science and graphic design. He grew up in a tiny town a few hours south of Albuquerque with no stoplights and one stop sign. His scholarships and job as a resident adviser were the only reason he could afford to stay in school. Usually, his job was easy. Evans Hall was an honors student dorm with mandatory quiet hours, two study rooms, and a state of the art computer lab. His duty was mainly to keep the freshman from getting alcohol poisoning and making sure no one slept in the computer lab. Unfortunately, things will be different this year.
On Monday, during RA orientation, Joshua found out that two of his students will be moved to other dorms. All because the little Princess daughter of one of the trustees and her boy toy had to be in Evans hall and on his floor. When the little princess moved in on Tuesday with designer luggage and camera crews in tow, Josh knew he would not like this person at all. He hated pretentious and fake people, and Sharpay Evans was definitely pretentious and fake.
Her only redeeming quality was that she helped him create the name stickers for the residence on his floor. Apparently, applying glitter to things makes her happy. On Friday, Chad, the boy toy, moved into the dorms, with arguing parents and a mini sporting goods store. That's when he realized neither of them belonged in this residence hall. Chad being a sophomore, must be some sort of typo along with that 4.2 high school GPA. He definitely did not look like the type of person who took AP classes, let alone college classes while in high school. The numbers are obviously reversed.
On Sunday morning, Joshua's assumptions were proven correct. Only a few days after moving in, both Sharpay and Chad's roommates requested transfers. Apparently, Sharpay's roommate Drusilla has an aversion to pink. Chad's roommate just cited irreconcilable differences. Josh really did not care; personally, he just wanted an excuse to get them out of his building.
"Classes have not even started yet, and you two have managed to scare away both your roommates. This is the first time in my three years as a resident adviser that I have had students begging for new roommates after less than 48 hours." Josh practically screamed at them.
"It was not our fault," the princess and the boy toy both said in unison.
"That's not what they said," Josh answered.
"Obviously they're lying to you. I don't see what is wrong with having a little pink here and there," Sharpay responded with an annoyed eye roll. Josh wondered if anyone has ever told her no before. Probably not. "Too much black is detrimental to my mental health. My therapist can attest to that." Of course, the princess had a therapist.
"I'm on the basketball team. I need to have my equipment in my own room," Chad added.
"Both of you need to learn to respect your roommates' needs and desires." Said Josh in response.
"But they don't need to respect our rights?" Sharpay asked in her defense. Josh decided to ignore her question.
"You painted the room pink without asking your roommate for permission." Josh spat out, annoyed. Yes, students were allowed to paint their rooms as long as they receive permission from the roommate and return the walls to their previous condition before moving out.
"I asked Sarah a month ago after meeting at orientation if it was okay to paint the room pink, and she said yes. I have the emails to prove it. Trust me, I would've loved an excuse to go with blue instead. How was I to know that you would switch out my roommate with someone who changed her name to that of a villain from Buffy the Vampire Slayer with a severe aversion to pink? In addition to a mommy that would do everything for her." Sharpay argued, but Josh didn't want to hear it. It was obviously an excuse.
"You through her black comforter in the trash," Josh yelled at Sharpay.
"Yes, after she tossed out everything of mine, even the non-pink stuff, and destroyed my dishes." The princess shot back, annoyed.
"Her grandmother made her that comforter on her deathbed," Josh said, repeating what Drusilla told him when she was in tears earlier.
"I didn't know it had sentimental value, considering that it was made in China," Sharpay answered sarcastically. Obviously, the princess was lying about that. "I have pictures, by the way. Not that you actually care about evidence."
"I don't care," he said to both of them. "Chad, you have no right to throw out your roommate's opera CDs."
"I did not do that. Bryce is lying." Chad argued back. "Did he tell you what he did to my iPod? Not that you would believe us."
"I know you two are used to getting whatever you want, being the rich spoiled brats that you are. I'm not your daddy, and I don't care. Neither one of you belongs in this building. Both of you will be gone as soon as I talk to the resident director. Stay here." Josh said as he left the RA offices, slamming the door behind him. He was sure that the occupants of the room would be gone from the building within the hour.
XXXX
48 hours earlier: Friday, August 15, 2008
Chad and Sharpay walked back into Evans hall with Ms. Sanchez behind them, almost in tears. The lunch went well overall. Sharpay even managed to get his parents to stop arguing for the duration of the meal. It helped that she could talk musicals with his mom. Although her favorite was Phantom of the Opera, she also adored Rent and In the Heights. By the end of lunch, Sharpay was now on a first-name basis with Chad's mom and making plans to go to a few Broadway musicals together next summer.
Thankfully Chad's dad ignored her and focused on his food for the duration of lunch. His acidic comments on the way there were giving her Darby flashbacks. She couldn't help but wonder if Chad had his own Darby. Mr. Danforth was giving off the same type of evil energy.
Now it was time for Carolyn to say goodbye to her baby boy. Thankfully, Chad's father already abandoned them at the restaurant. Carolyn was already crying hard. Sharpay's dad never acted like this. Sharpay is thankful Darby never tried to put on this façade. Nope, she just forced Sharpay to paint her room pink and picked out all the accessories.
"Please do not do anything stupid this semester. I love you." Carolyn said as she pulled her son into a hug and kissed his cheek.
"Mom, your embarrassing me," Chad said as he pulled away from his mom.
"When you push a 9-pound baby with a big head through your private parts, you have the right to embarrass the hell out of him in public." Of course, Sharpay started snickering at that.
"Sharpay, it was lovely to see you again. Especially given the fact you and Chad aren't sniping at each other anymore." Sharpay laughed at that. They used to get into fights all the time when they were little. Unlike her mom, Carolyn would show up to parent-teacher conferences.
"If Obama wins the election, you two will have to come up to DC for the inauguration. I definitely want to see you again before the summer Broadway season." That's when Carolyn actually went over to hug her. It took a lot of Sharpay's acting skills not to react. She's getting better at handling physical contact from people that she doesn't know, but sometimes it's still hard.
"That's a wonderful idea. Daddy is always giving money to various Congressional campaigns, I'm sure I can get tickets." Plus, DC is close to New York, so Ryan could come down. They could see each other again, which is always a plus. She hated Ryan being so far away in New York, but strangely enough, she felt better with Chad being in the same building as her. Maybe it's because he's a piece of familiarity. They've been in each other spear since kindergarten.
"Take care of my baby, Sharpay." Ms. Sanchez said just loud enough for Sharpay to hear as she pulled out of the hug.
"I will," Sharpay whispered back as she and Chad began to make their way to their rooms on the sixth floor.
"Your mom seems nice," Sharpay said to break the silence. She also bit her tongue to not call Chad's father and asshole because he really was one.
"She's wonderful when my father is not around, which is why they got a divorce. It was for the best." Chad answered as they stepped out of the elevator and began walking toward Sharpay's room. "I can't wait to see your room. Is this the first time you're going to have a non-pink room?"
"You'll be amazed at what my mother can convince the school to allow with a donation or two. Pink is now on the approved list of room colors. Unfortunately, it has to be light pink." As the two walked closer to Sharpay's room, they notice a blonde woman standing in the door, ordering people around.
"Just put the pink stuff over on the floor, will have to get replacements later." The woman in the doorway instructed.
"What are you doing with my stuff?" Sharpay asked the woman as she stormed into her dorm room. She was not happy.
"I'm sorry I thought we sent an email that said no pink. My baby hates pink. Darlene just can't stand the color." The blond woman said as she moved all of Sharpay's pink things out of the room.
"It's Drusilla, mom. We have to take down your posters as well. I hope you don't mind, don't worry, we will replace them." Drusilla said as she ripped Sharpay as posters off the wall. Sharpay was thankful that wasn't her signed version of her In the Heights poster. She knew enough to keep the valuable stuff at the mansion.
"The painters will be here Monday to get rid of this ugly pink color." Drusilla's mom added from the side of the room.
Sharpay was 30 seconds from telling mother and daughter to go fuck themselves. She didn't even want a pink room, that was all Darby. But it was the principle of the matter. Before she could go off, Chad grabbed her arm to drag her away from the room.
"While you two finish in the room, Sharpay is going to help me unpack. You two ladies have fun."
As soon as they were down the hall, Sharpay was beginning to shake with anger. Who the hell gave them the right to just mess up all her stuff like that?
"Sorry, I had to get you out of there before you went full mountain lion on them. I never thought I would see someone who was a bigger diva than you."
"Diva is not the word I would use. She's going down regardless." Sharpay spat out bitterly.
"Just breathe Sharpay. Just think of spring break in Cancun. If you kill your roommate, you will not get to go there."
"That's where all the college kids go. You know I hate being normal. I was thinking maybe somewhere in India or Japan."
"Heaven forbid Sharpay Evans is ever normal," Chad smirked at her. "Every time the little princess and mommy dearest over there makes you mad, just think about your spring break plans."
"Does that really work?" Sharpay asked, just starting to calm down.
"I survived working for you for the summer by thinking of my new car; of course, it works."
Just as the two were approaching Chad's room, a basketball flew past them. They also heard a voice from the room, scream, "I hate sports."
"Just remember, Chad, visualize something positive," Sharpay smirked as she used her camera phone to capture the entire scene. Ryan is going to love this.
Sharpay: Chad and I got the roommates from hell. We are so chatting about this later. Ryan, I need to vent. See pictures.
Sharpay: Dad owes me a better bribe.
XXXX
August 16, 2008, 8:29 AM.
Chad sat in the downstairs study lounge reading his calculus textbooks, as he listened to his iPod. He desperately needed to listen to something other than opera. At this point, he would be willing to listen to selections from Twinkle Towne.
Chad was never angrier at Troy then he was now. If Troy would have come to U of A, then Chad would not be stuck with the roommate from hell. After throwing all of Chad's sporting goods out the door, Chad's roommate Bryce began to blast opera music threw their room. He knew Sharpay could hear it from her room all the way down the hall. She told Ryan who, of course, told him. Chad did not have time to read all the Evans hall rules; he knew that loud music was prohibited. Yet the RA said nothing.
Chad realized he would be moving out of this room in two weeks when he had to prevent Sharpay from hitting Bryce after he insulted musical theatre. Bryce believes that musicals are the lowest form of entertainment. He also called it a "bastardization of the grand operatic tradition." His comments on hip-hop were even worse and definitely racist. He also said that all bisexual men were just gay men in the closet. Fuck him.
Both Sharpay and Chad agreed to do whatever was necessary to survive the two weeks until they could switch dorm rooms. Even if this meant allowing their roommates to walk all over them. Now Chad was hiding out in the study lounge studying for classes that have not even started yet. His girlfriend would be so proud.
"Are you hiding from your roommate from hell?" Sharpay asked from the hall.
"It's either that or grabbing my basketballs from your dorm room to throw at his head. Thank you for keeping them." He really was thankful for Sharpay.
"Thank you for keeping all my pink stuff, I was positive that the vampire wannabe was going to throw the stuff in the trash again. She already took a pair of scissors to my comforter. We can take the stuff to the mansion today if you want. You can keep it there until you get a different roommate." Sharpay offered.
"Why can't we stay in the mansion until we get different roommates?" Seriously, why were they staying here when there was an empty mansion available?
"Because daddy would fly back from his business meeting, just to kick you out of my bedroom… I mean the house." Sharpay did have a point.
"I know you want me in your bedroom, but I have a girlfriend," Chad said with a small smile. He would've made a joke about all Evans wanting him, but Ryan probably didn't tell his sister about the kiss for a reason. He's going to respect Ryan on that.
"Hilarious, curly top. Only 13 days until we can get different roommates. Look on the bright side, your roommate isn't using your new dishes as an ashtray."
"13 days, just 13 days," Chad began to repeat to calm down. It was going to be a long two weeks. He would take mopey Troy again over this.
XXXXX
August 17, 2008
"He didn't listen to a word we said," Chad said in annoyance as soon as Josh exited the room.
"He does not want us here because we don't meet his image of what perfect honor students are supposed to be like." Sharpay retorted and irritation.
"So, he's going to get rid of us because he doesn't like us?" Chad asked.
"Essentially yes," Sharpay sighed.
"That's just great," Chad said as he sat back down on the chair. "We have just as much right to be here as anyone else, even if we don't look like traditional brains."
"They wouldn't have let us in the honors dorm if we didn't meet the minimum requirements. We were both honor roll students in high school, and neither have Mickey Mouse majors."
"I'm not a brain." Chad retorted in Sharpay just laughed.
"High school is over Chad and I'm not your girlfriend. I do not care that you are smarter than I am. I also do not care that jocks are not supposed to be intelligent. I saw the chemistry and calculus books on the table yesterday. You can fool your friends, but not me."
"How did you know about the honor roll thing?" Chad asked. "Did Ryan tell you?"
"It was on your job application for Lava Springs last year, along with all the college classes you've already taken. Although now, I am going to have to talk to my twin about keeping secrets."
"Okay, so I'm a brain. Apparently, your one as well. But what are we going to do?" Chad really wanted some guidance from Sharpay on this one.
"Josh is just the RA. We will speak to his superior." Sharpay said as she started to dig through her purse.
"How are we going to do that we're stuck in this room?"
"Don't you just love modern technology?" Sharpay said as she pulled out her smartphone and switched it to speaker mode.
"Hello, Lisa. It is Sharpay."
"It's good to hear from you. Sharpay, your dad told me you would be in the dorms this year last time I saw him at the club. We'll have to schedule lunch, and you can tell me all about how your liking dorm life so far." Lisa said on the other side of the line.
"Honestly, not very well. That's why I'm calling."
"What happened?" Lisa asked kindly.
"A lot. I know we should have talked to you as soon as things started going bad. We are having problems with our roommates and RA. We thought we could resolve them ourselves or hold out until we could transfer rooms. Unfortunately, that is not an option anymore. I am going to be sending you some videos of what has been going on." Sharpay explained.
"You know I really shouldn't be surprised that you have evidence." Neither should Chad really.
"I am an Evans; of course, I am going to get evidence. Word of mouth testimony is worthless. I learned that a long time ago." The way Sharpay said that may Chad concerned. What happened to make her feel that way?
"Thank you for looking into this, Lisa," Sharpay said as she hung up the phone.
"You are a genius," Chad said as Sharpay began to send the files to the head of Residents Life.
XXXX
Josh quietly waited in the living room of the Resident Director for his section. He was confident that he will get rid of his two problem students. The testimony of their roommates should guarantee that the two would be out before classes even began.
"Sorry to keep you waiting, Josh, but I just received a very interesting phone call from the head a Resident's Life Lisa Sherman. It seems that there are some major problems on your floor." The middle-aged woman said as she walked into the room.
"That's why I came to speak with you; it seems that two of our students are causing major problems. They should be removed from the building instead of just sent to another room in the complex." Josh argued.
"Yes, two of your students are causing major problems. Just not the two, you think. Why don't we watch a video that was just sent to me a few minutes ago?"
After 30 seconds of watching the video, Josh knew that he was screwed.
XXXX
"I'm so sorry about what happened to you and Chad. You should have told me what was going on earlier." Lisa said as she led the two back to their rooms.
"We thought we could handle it," Sharpay said in there defense.
"We had no idea that the RA was out to get us," Chad added.
"We're here to help students, not let our own prejudice lead to mistreatment. Your RA was actually convinced that your GPA on your file was a typo." Lisa told him.
"I'm not even surprised." And Chad wasn't considering that Taylor said something similar last year.
"Your roommates will be reassigned to private rooms in other buildings. Your RA is now on probation and is being moved to another building as well. In two weeks, you two will receive new roommates. Hopefully, it will go better the second time around."
"I hope so too," Sharpay said quietly.
"It's nice to meet you Chad, I'm so glad that Mr. Evans asked for you to be in the same building."
"What?" The two yelled in unison. They were not expecting her to say that.
"Mr. Evans felt it was best for you and your boyfriend to live in the same building. I think your brother suggested it first. From the videos, I could see Chad really cares about you, Sharpay. You're such an adorable couple."
Before Chad could argue, Sharpay pulled him away, saying, "Thank you, Lisa, for all your help."
"Don't say anything Chad, you can yell at Ryan later after we pick up our stuff from the mansion. I'll let you drive the convertible." Sharpay said as she dangled the keys in front of Chad.
"I am only staying quiet because you are letting me drive the convertible." He said as he took the car keys from her. "Also, we are calling your brother from the car. We can make good use of your speakerphone feature again."
XXXX
Ryan just got back from brunch with Kelsi and her roommate Natasha when Chad called. It was the first time he had any time with her in a week.
"Why does your father think I'm dating Sharpay?"
"You could say hi first," Ryan said to deflect. He didn't think Chad would find out about this.
"Hi. Are you having a good Sunday? My Sunday has been a little weird. After getting rid of the evil roommates, I found out from the head of residents life that your father thinks I'm dating your sister. Allegedly you are the source of this information. Why does your dad think I'm dating your sister?" Okay, deflection did not work.
"You've been begging me all summer to help you get better accommodations at U of A, including air conditioning. The building you were originally assigned to was awful and had no air. He was happy to help my boyfriend but not just a friend. Since I already told him we were only friends, I told him that you were dating Sharpay. I convinced him you were keeping it quiet for my sake. Because he believed me, you and Sharpay ended up in the good honors dorm together. Which is what I wanted because if I can't be there for Sharpay, I want you there." Chad yelled something in Spanish that Ryan couldn't quite understand.
"Okay, I can understand you doing this for big brother reasons. I wish you would've told me about it first."
"Sorry. I should have."
"It's fine. I asked for your help, and you provided it. Just not the way I thought you would. Although why did your dad think I was a potential boyfriend? He knows about Kelsi, right? Also, why would I be keeping the fact I am dating your sister quiet to spare your feelings?"
"I think dad thinks she's my beard. Probably because he knew about our Lava Springs ill-advised post-baseball game make-out session last summer. Which is also why he believes you and Sharpay are trying to spare my feelings. Only Darby thinks I'm heterosexual. Dad knows better."
"You kissed my brother?" Oh, fuck! Sharpay just heard that. "And you went back to Taylor after that? Once you go Evans, you should never go back. Ryan is so much better than her." Okay, he wasn't expecting that reaction.
"Don't smack my shoulder when I'm driving," Chad yelled.
"Make better dating choices," Sharpay yelled back.
"You have me on speakerphone?" He asked already, knowing.
"Yes, Chad is driving the convertible to the mansion to pick up our stuff now that the evil roommates are gone. We decided it would be more efficient to yell at you on the drive there. Except I find out that my brother finally made a move on his junior year crush and never told me."
"You knew?" Ryan asked, surprised.
"I always know, baby brother. Also, dad wasn't the only one who assumed Kelsi was your beard. I thought you were only with her to make Darby happy."
"I would never date anyone to make Darby happy. I'm flexible."
"Good. Was Chad just hopelessly straight then?" Sharpay asked. Ryan really hoped Chad would take this one.
"No, I decided we were better as friends. Also, I didn't want Taylor to kill me if I dumped her for your brother even if we were only semi-dating." Okay, that was new. Chad never said that part before. Ryan felt that might've been true. "He is an excellent kisser, though."
"I'm aware," Sharpay responded, and Ryan buried his head under his pillow. "That explains why Bryce's biphobic comments pissed you off."
"I was just being a dick when I made up that incest rumor sophomore year." So that's who started the rumor. "I didn't think they would actually be any truth to it."
"Drama club had very few male members, and I ended up playing a romantic lead against my own brother a few times. By sophomore year, we realized it was too weird mostly because of your rumor." Sharpay explained.
"I'm sorry I told dad you were dating," Ryan told the two, very thankful he was several states away right now.
"It's fine," Sharpay said in a way that Ryan almost believed her. "Lisa believes it, though, because of the video I showed her. Apparently, Chad's a very caring fake boyfriend without even realizing it. I'm sending you the video of my hell roommates. Be thankful you will never experience this."
After watching the video, he really was.
xxxxx
Ryan: I think my ex-crush might have a crush on my sister. Also, I may have lie to my dad and told him they were dating so I could have him in the same building as my sister to keep an eye on her. They found out, and they're not even mad about it.
Kim: Ex-crush? Don't lie to me, because I know better.
Kim: You and your sister have a bizarre relationship. And I say that as Sharpay's best friend.
Ryan: I realize that Chad and me really are better as friends. Also, Sharpay now knows that I kissed him, by the way. I accidentally said too much because I didn't realize Chad had her on speakerphone."
Kim: How did she react?
Ryan: She only yelled a little bit, which is surprisingly tame for Sharpay.
Ryan: Also, she may have smacked Chad on the arm in my honor for not picking me over Taylor.
Kim: That is a weird reaction, especially considering she has had a crush on him for forever. Troy even agreed with me.
Ryan: I know. You know Troy?
Kim: I was his tutor sophomore year. We talked a lot before New York. Until his mom told me to stay the hell away from him. She even changed their phone number. How did you know about Sharpay's crush?
Ryan: It's a twin thing. I just know this stuff. Also, she just sent me a text asking if Chad is actually a good kisser.
Kim: You and your sister have a weird relationship.
Ryan: I'm aware. I didn't mean for this to go this way.
Kim: You were hoping that he would end up breaking up with Taylor, and you could sweep him off his feet?
Ryan: You know I wouldn't do that to Taylor because she's a good friend. At least I wouldn't do it now. I just wanted someone around to watch Sharpay's back. I hate being in New York without her here.
Kim: So I probably should have told you last week that as of Friday I'm back in Albuquerque and starting at the University of Albuquerque tomorrow.
Ryan: Does Sharpay know?
Kim: I wanted it to be a surprise.
Ryan: I think she will be surprised.
To be continued
This is also something new. Ryan needs more friends. If I'm going to do a rewrite, I'm going to do a rewrite. I'm tempted to go back and do a prequel covering the ill-advised baseball seduction incident and basketball camp 2006. Although I could do a flashback later in the story. What do you think?