I know it's been awhile since I've updated, but I've had some issues with my parents that I had to deal with and then I ended up having a sinus infection and bronchitis, so I wasn't up to writing. I needed to concentrate on myself for a few days, but now I'm better and back.
The past few days have been bittersweet for Christian. He's come face-to-face with the one person he can say he honestly hates; the one he never wanted or expected to see again. What are the odds that his abuser would show back up in his life twenty-two years later? He has dedicated most of his life to making sure that he never finds himself a victim again. He's spent years in therapy, strengthening his mind and mental health and now spends five days a week working on his physical strength. He knows that he'll never be the perfect specimen, but before coming face-to-face with the monster, he thought he was in great shape. Sure, he's got a few control issues, but he felt positive about himself and where his life was heading. Until now. Now, everything has changed.
Fuck. He barely kept his composure long enough to reach the hotel and he ended up shattering right in front of Anastasia. He should be stronger than this. It's been more than enough time to get over his demons. He doesn't understand why one look at the mother fucker sent him into hysterics. The fucker is just a man..a pitiful one at that. Nothing special. Yea, just a man that beat his mother and himself. Just thinking about what happened as a toddler makes the cigarette marks burn again. The asshole might have left his life, but his print on Christian will last forever. The six burn marks on his chest and the five on his back will always be a constant reminder. His mark.
Thank God for his beautiful Anastasia. She is his rock. She's the person he can go to about anything and he knows she won't judge him for any of it. He sobbed into her neck like a child and not one part of him felt embarrassed over it. He was disappointed in himself for being so brittle, but he knows that Anastasia didn't feel that way. Still doesn't. She is such a beautiful creature. She knows how to make him feel normal...make him feel like he isn't a shattered three year old stuck in a grown man's body. She's assured him over and over that what he is feeling isn't a defeat, but part of his journey. His Journey. It makes him feel so much better. He's hoping that by the end of this journey, the fucker will have no more hold over him.
The only good thing to come out of Detroit is their relationship. He finally admitted his feelings for her and she admitted that she feels the same. She's his now. Really his. She's his everything. His best friend, his rock, his lover...the mother of his unborn child. His whole world is wrapped up in the girl sitting next to him.
"You're awfully quiet." Anastasia states, looking Christian over. He's driving them to his parents for Sunday dinner. He keeps reaching up and running his palm over his chest and it's worrying her. She isn't sure if he's getting sick, has a rash, or something else...but she can't help but notice that his palm is following the line of scars along his chest. A part of her wonders if his head is still stuck in Detroit, but she doesn't want to force the subject on him before they get to his parents unless he brings it up himself.
Christian sighs. "I've got a lot on my mind." Reaching over, he takes her hand in his and brings it to his lips.
"Want to talk about it?"
He rests her hand on his thigh and reaches for the stick shift as he slows down at a light. "I can't stop running the last few days over in my head."
Anastasia frowns. She knows that he's having a hard time with this. She wishes it could be easier for him.
"I can't get his disgusting face out of my head." In the twenty seconds it took him to realize who it was, he had seemed to memorize every mark and wrinkle in the monster's face. The fucker keeps popping into his head, taking over his dreams, and ruining his time with Anastasia. "I don't understand why I deserve this. Out of everyone in the fucking world, why did it have to be him? Why did we have to come face-to-face again?"
"Oh, Christian." Anastasia squeezes and rubs his thigh, soothingly. "I'm so sorry you're having such a terrible time with this. I know it's hard to swallow right now, but maybe it's fate."
He snorts.
"No, just listen to me for a second. Maybe you were meant to meet again because you are the only one who knows how much of a monster he really is and the only one who has the guts to do something about it. If the police find what you think they will, then John-"
"Don't say his name!" Christian's whole body jolts at the fucker's name.
"I'm sorry...then the monster will get what he deserves and won't be able to abuse or control anyone else. Karma will prevail. He'll get what's coming to him in prison and you'll just become a stronger person over it. I know it's hard right now, but I promise you, Christian, this isn't going to break you. This is only going to make you stronger. You'll be an even better person because of this." Anastasia offers him an encouraging smile and Christian automatically relaxes at her words. She always knows what to say.
"Thank you, Ana."
She shakes her head. "No need to thank me, Christian. I want to be here for you. I'll always be here for you. I know that what you're going through is hard and it's going to take awhile for you to overcome the devastation that you suffered over the last few days. I'm here to stand by you, hold your hand, and kiss your worries away as much as I can."
Christian grins. "I like that idea." He wiggles his eyebrows, making her giggle.
He pulls into his parents driveway and turns the vehicle off. Anastasia takes off her seat belt and reaches for the door, but he stops her.
"Wait."
Her eyebrows knit together. "What is it, Christian?"
"Give me a kiss." They've decided to wait a little while before telling their families that they're together. Since it's so new, they want to navigate it on their own first. It's important that they take this relationship on their terms, without the others influencing anything. Christian wants to get one more kiss in before he can't touch her for a few hours.
"So demanding, beau." Anastasia teases, leaning over the center console to kiss him. She begins to pull back, but he grabs the back of her head and leans into the kiss, deepening it. He doesn't release her until they're both oxygen-starved and panting.
"Hell, Christian. You're going to suck the life right out of me."
Christian chuckles. "Sorry, baby. I can't get enough of you."
XxXxXx
Grace is anxious to see Christian tonight. When he told her that he was heading to Detroit for a couple days, it really worried her. She knows that he has unresolved issues with the city and he's come such a long way over his adulthood. She's worried that this trip, although brief, might set him back more than the good it'll do for his business. She wanted to tell Christian that the yard wasn't worth the damage it might cause, but she knows that it isn't her decision. He is now a grown man and it's his decision. He felt that he was stable enough to go, so she had to trust that he knew himself well enough to know where his weaknesses lie. She hasn't spoken to him since he's returned and she's definitely determined to speak to him about the trip tonight.
When Christian and Anastasia come through the door, both of them are in good spirits. Christian smiles at his mom when he sees her and hugs her tightly against him, kissing her forehead.
He always feels such affection when he sees his mother, but this weekend, the affection is just so much stronger. She really has saved him from a miserable life. He could have spent his life hopping from one foster home to the next or could have been adopted by abusive parents, but he was lucky enough to get the most patient, loving mother. He can't imagine what life he might have led if he was stuck with a different circumstance. He could be in jail right now. He could be a woman beater or drug addict. Instead, he's loved, he's stable, and he's making a difference in the world. All because Grace made a difference in his world.
"Ana, how are you feeling?" Grace hugs Anastasia to her and lets it linger. Anastasia enjoys the warmth of Grace's hug. She's always been a second mother to Anastasia and the hug is almost as comforting as her own mother's.
"I'm good. My nausea has been much better this week."
"That's a relief. Has my boy been taking good care of you?"
Christian rolls his eyes.
"Great care." Anastasia looks up at him, giving him a secret smile. Great care in many ways.
Grace slips her hand into Christian's elbow and tugs lightly. "I wouldn't expect anything, but. Let's go have a seat at the table while we wait for Elliot to arrive. Mia is spending Sunday dinner at her boyfriend's house. I swear... those two are attached at the hip now." Grace shakes her head. "Anyway, Anastasia, I bought some decaf iced tea the other day."
Anastasia grins. "Oh, great!" She loves tea of all kinds, although English breakfast tea is her favorite, she can only have it sparingly now and tries to drink it before lunch. "Excuse me…" She hurries ahead of them to the dining room to pour herself some tea, making Christian and Grace laugh.
"I've never seen anyone so happy about a glass of iced tea." Grace smiles at the back of Anastasia while they make their way to the dining room.
That's just the way Anastasia is. She's happy with anything given to her, no matter how small. She appreciates Grace's small gesture because she knows that Grace did it just for her. She took the energy to get something special for Anastasia and Anastasia will reciprocate the energy as a form of respect and appreciation.
XxXxXx
Kate is quickly becoming a permanent fixture in Elliot's life. She now comes to Sunday dinner on a weekly basis and Elliot spends most of the evening drooling over her like a little puppy. It's odd for his family to see. Usually, there is a revolving door of women in his life and they are the ones drooling over him. One has never caught and kept Elliot's attention like Kate has. He's completely smitten over the strawberry blonde beauty and it's a pleasant surprise for his family to see. Kate seems to have a good head on her shoulders and she has a strong enough personality to rival Elliot's. They balance each other very well.
When they all tuck into their meal, Elliot catches Kate's eye and nods toward the table. She ignores him, but he won't give up that easy. Kate has great news to share and he wants her to announce it to his family. He's so proud of her. Leaning over, he bumps his shoulder with hers.
"Tell them." He whispers.
Carrick hears. "Kate? Do you have some news for us?"
Kate smiles down at her plate. "It's just some news I found out while I was at school today." Kate is in her last year at the university, her major being Journalism. She's always dreamed of writing for a major magazine, or even being a news anchor some day.
"Go ahead, woman!" Elliot elbows her in the arm.
Kate laughs. "I have to complete a six-month internship before I graduate, so I submitted a few of my columns from the school's newspaper to a few of the regional papers and magazines and The Seattle Times reached out to the journalism director and offered me an internship."
"Oh, that's great!" Grace is beaming at not only Kate, but Elliot, too. The pride on Elliot's face for his girlfriend is evident and it's lovely to see her son so crazy for this girl. She knows he loves her.
"That's such an honor, Kate! We need to celebrate!" Carrick stands and heads into the kitchen to grab a bottle of champagne out of the fridge and some flutes.
"When do you start?" Anastasia asks, taking a bite of food.
"In two weeks. I have to move a couple of classes around before I can start."
"You must be so excited, Kate! Interning there will open so many doors for you."
"I am excited...but I'm also nervous. It's kind of intimidating."
"Don't be nervous, babe. You got this." Elliot slips an arm around her and kisses her temple.
"Absolutely. If The Seattle Times made the effort to reach out to your program director, they see something special, Kate. I'm sure you'll do well. I know that nothing anyone says will probably help with your nervousness now, but we have faith in you. You've got a strong head on your shoulders. I'm excited for you." Over the last couple months, Anastasia has noticed the drive Kate has. She puts her all in everything she does and has wonderful time-management skills. Anastasia has found herself even being envious over the skill. She has always had an issue with time-management and she can only see this becoming an even bigger problem now that she and Christian are a couple.
Kate is pleasantly surprised by Anastasia's words and she takes them to heart. "Thank you, Ana. There's just so much to learn! I hope I can soak it all in while I'm there. I really want to wow them by the time my internship is over. If I do, maybe they'll put me on the payroll."
Christian grins. "Maybe an interview with a private, brooding billionaire will help that." He is infamous for refusing interviews, no matter the source. He feels that his private life is just that. Private. He doesn't feel that there really is any reason for interviews. If someone is looking for information on the company or his business ventures, it's public record. Look it up. If it can't be found via internet or public record, then it shouldn't be asked.
Kate gasps. "No! Really? You'd do that?" She's practically dancing in her seat. There is no way that the newspaper can deny her employment if she seals an interview with the most powerful businessman in Seattle.
"Of course."
Anastasia reaches over and squeezes Christian's bicep. She loves this man so much. He's such a caring individual. He wants Kate to succeed and he's willing to help to make sure she does.
"Well, you're in a good mood, Christian. I take it the Detroit trip went well?" Grace smiles at Christian, but Christian's smile disappears. "Oh. Oh, no. What happened?" Grace's heart bottoms out when she sees Christian's sudden change.
Christian dabs at his mouth with his cloth napkin and relaxes back in his dining chair, sighing. He knows he needs to tell his parents what happened.
Anastasia chews her lip with her eyes on Christian, worried for him. She knows the last thing he wants is to fall apart in front of his family. It's important to him that he keep a strong exterior for his family, no matter how broken he is internally. He rubs his palms on the thighs and Anastasia slides her chair a little closer to him and reaches for his hand. His eyes meet hers and she gives him an encouraging nod. "It's okay, Christian."
"Kate, why don't we step out and take a walk around the backyard for a few minutes?" Elliot asks, wanting to give Christian the privacy he needs with their parents. He knows that Christian will fill him in later.
"Yes, I think that's a good idea." Kate agrees, standing and taking her boyfriend's hand.
Christian gives him an appreciative nod and Elliot squeezes his shoulder on their way out, his little way of showing his younger brother support.
"Christian… what happened?" Carrick is worried for his son. When Grace told him where Christian was heading on Thursday, he was concerned. He knew that it wasn't going to go well. Although Christian keeps a tough exterior, he's a sensitive person.
Anastasia squeezes Christian's hand and he runs his thumb over the back of her knuckles.
There is no way to put this lightly or ease into it. He just has to come out with it. "It turns out that the owner of the shipyard is the pimp that controlled Ella."
Crickets.
Both of his parents are staring, wide-mouthed, at him. Both seem to have lost the power of speech and even the use of their eyelids to blink.
"How… How did you find out?" Grace is the first to speak. Tears begin to fall. "Please tell me that you found out before…"
Christian shakes his head. "I didn't know until we were face-to-face."
Grace's hand comes up and grips the fabric of her shirt at her chest. Her heart aches for her boy. Her eyes search his face, but it's expressionless. He's completely composed...but it worries her. She knows he's affected by this. She hates that he can't express that to them.
Carrick releases the breath he's holding. "Jesus Christ. Son, are you alright? What did you do?"
Christian shrugs off his question of concern. "When we came face-to-face, I just got up and left the room, but when I was in the hall, he began to follow me. He didn't know who I was. Hearing his voice made me so angry… I ended up turning back around and I hit him...then when he fell to the ground, I kicked him. I lost control for a few minutes, but I don't think I did much damage. We went because the numbers weren't adding up. I'd bet my whole fortune that he's sinking it into drugs and women that he's controlling. Then he's taking the revenue from pimping them out and hiding it elsewhere. I don't know if it's hiding in another bank account somewhere or if he's sinking it back into drugs to keep his girls addicted and under his control. I got the police involved."
"Oh, Christian… you dealt with all of this alone? Why didn't you call me?" Grace is trying to keep her tears at bay, but they continue to fall. She's breaking for her son and he's sitting a few feet away talking as if it's any other subject. His face is passive, his voice is strong and confident...nothing cracks. His exterior is as hard as ever. She isn't sure how she feels about that.
"I didn't deal with it on my own. When I told Ana where I was going, she offered to go with me. She was there. She was at the hotel when I got back." Christian's eyes find Anastasia's and he gives her a warm smile. "She was so supportive."
"Oh, Ana, you incredible girl. I thank God for you, darling."
Anastasia beams at the compliment.
"She is incredible." Christian agrees and leans over to kiss her. She giggles when he lets it linger, knowing that he just let the cat out of the bag.
Grace's gasp causes Christian to pull away and he grins a bashful boyish grin at his mother.
"About damn time, son." Carrick gives Christian a full-fledge grin and wiggles his eyebrows.
Grace smacks her husband's shoulder, but expresses her relief for her son and his best friend.
"When did this happen?" Carrick asks, curious.
"Detroit. After everything that happened with the pimp, I knew I couldn't waste anymore time. I had to tell her that I love her."
Grace coos.
"And what'd she say?" Grace grins.
"That I love him, too." Anastasia answers, feeling like a giddy teenage girl. She blushes, but can't keep the grin off of her face.
"We're trying to keep it under wraps for now. It's a new thing for us and we want to take it at our own speed. We'd appreciate it if you tried not to mention it to Elliot and Mia. At least not yet." Christian hopes that his parents understand.
Grace nods. "Of course, Christian. I understand that your siblings can be a little overbearing."
Christian snorts. That's the nice way of saying they're annoying as hell.
XxXxXx
"Are you staying tonight?" Anastasia searches through her drawers in her bedroom to find her pajamas, but Christian is already undressing, answering her question.
"You really think I'd be anywhere else?" His girl and his baby are here. He needs to be here with them. He wants to be.
She looks over her shoulder at him and smiles. The love he has for her touches her to her soul. He always finds the simplest of ways to express how important she is to him. He makes her feel like she's on top of the world with just one sentence, one touch, one look. She loves falling asleep in his arms and waking up to him wrapped around her like a vine. He clings to her like she's his lifeline and it makes her feel almost invincible.
Christian strips down to his boxer-briefs and turns down the bed while he waits for Anastasia to change. He settles into the bed and enjoys the sight in front of him.
Anastasia pulls her shirt over her head and he gets a beautiful view of the ivory skin on her back, her long extensions tickling the small of her back a few inches above her black pants. She reaches behind her to unsnap her lavender bra and she lets it fall away, the straps slipping down her arms.
"Turn around, baby. Let me see you." Christian urges.
She turns towards him topless, giving him a grin. "Better?" She asks as she reaches for the button of her pants.
"So much."
He watches her shimmy her bottoms down, leaving on her lace thong. He's never seen anything so sexy. She's bare except for her panties and her little bump swells just above the small swatch of fabric. Soon, she's covered and he frowns when an oversized t-shirt covers her to the top of her thighs.
"Don't pout." She sees the pout tugging at his lips and unfortunately she finds his pout so damn sexy. She climbs into bed and his pout turns into a soft smile. "Don't start that, Grey. News first." She knows if they start playing now, they'll be tangled in bed for hours and she'll be exhausted and sore for work tomorrow.
Christian huffs. He'll never understand her obsession with having to watch the news every damn night. The world is such a terrible place and there's nothing, but heartache and negativity on the evening news. It isn't good for her to watch it every night, especially being pregnant.
She cocks an eyebrow at him. "Remote."
"Fine." He concedes, but if she thinks that he isn't going caress her skin while they watch, then she's got another thing coming. He loves the softness of her skin, the smoothness of her unblemished, scarless body, and the way it only takes one touch of his hand to make her break out in goosebumps from head-to-toe.
While Anastasia lays, engrossed in the television, Christian lays, engrossed in her. Her back is pressed against his front as he spoons her and his fingertips wander down until they find the skin of her thigh. His hand runs up and down her thigh a few times before wandering even further up until he finds her sweet little bump. He takes his time on her abdomen, rubbing it in circles and up and down, already daydreaming about how it'll feel to rub her stomach when it swells even more. His hand continues its way around her waist, to her back, where he begins to rub up and down the length of her back. Anastasia lets out a contented sigh and her body relaxes as he continues to rub her back.
He leans in and presses a few kisses to the skin below her ear. "You like that?"
She sighs again. "Yes, don't stop. It's Heaven." She rolls a little more toward her front, offering more of her back to him. "Use your nails."
So demanding. He shakes his head at her, but runs his fingernails up and down her back, lightly scratching.
"Oh, yea. That's it."
Christian laughs. "If I didn't know better, I'd say you might like this better than sex."
She giggles. "With the others, I'd say yes. With you, it's a close second. Sex with you is out of his world."
"Damn right. I could show you right now, if you'd like." He presses his hard-on into her soft backside.
"Later." She states, her attention returning to the television. Realizing his hand has stopped, she looks over her shoulder. "What happened to the scratching?"
Christian begins to run his nails up and down her back, murmuring to himself.
"Don't think I didn't hear that, Grey."
His hand comes in contact with her bare buttock, a sharp smack for her sassiness.
She squeaks in surprise, but her backside comes back a little to press against his palm. Christian is the only one who has ever smacked her backside like this, but she finds herself being turned on when he does so.
"My girl's got a kinky side." Christian spanks her backside again before his fingers find their way between her legs, slipping into her underwear. He's right. She's wet. "Someone's ready."
She giggles and rolls to her back, pushing his arm away as she turns. "I said later."
"Patience is not a virtue of mine, Ana."
"I know." She wouldn't mind turning the television off and letting him have his way with her, but now it's a game. She wants to make him wait. "News first, sex later."
"But, Ana…" He whines snuggling back up to her, his erection pressing into her backside while he tries nibbling on the sensitive skin of her neck. "I want you."
"In a minute." She tries to concentrate on the television, but his lips on her neck and his solid shaft pressing against her backside is making her resolve crumble. Blinking a few times, she forces her attention back to the television.
"Oh, my god, Christian. Look! It's that woman." The woman that they saw on the television at the doctor's office is back on the news, only this time, they've found her body.
'Joanne Dunn's body was found stuffed into a deep freezer in her very own basement. The deep freezer was secured with a padlock, leading police to believe that the woman was still alive when placed in the freezer.'
"Oh, my god, Christian. Who could do that?" Anastasia shakes her head, heartsick over the news.
Christian hugs Anastasia close to him and presses his lips to the back of her head.
'Her family says that she is a very caring, loving woman who would never hurt a soul. She had no known enemies and they say they can't imagine anyone who would ever want to hurt her. Her family is urging anyone who might have any clues to who her killer is, to come forward. Her son is offering a reward of $50,000 dollars to anyone with information leading them to her killer. The family has put together a video of some of her favorite things, showing just how beautiful Joanne really was. As we leave you tonight, we urge you to hold on to your loved ones extra tight. As this case shows, you really don't know just how much longer you might have with them. This is Stacey Cruz with Seattle Eleven News. Goodnight.'
As the video plays, it shows a few of the quilts the woman has made, a dozen pictures of her with her friends and family, and then it zeros in on a notebook of hers. In loopy, cursive handwriting it shows what appears to be a story.
Anastasia's blood goes cold. "Pause it."
"Why?"
"Pause it!" Anastasia jumps out of bed and Christian pauses the television. As he watches her pull out her laptop, he becomes even more confused.
"What's going on, Ana?"
"You'll see."
When she finds what she needs, she turns her laptop around so that Christian can see.
Looking over the page, Christian's eyebrows knit together. It looks like a page from a manuscript. "I don't understand."
"Read from the fifth line down and then look at the television."
Christian does what Anastasia tells him to do and the blood drains from his face. "Anastasia...who's manuscript is this?"
"Jack Hyde's."
"Fuck."
"Do you think he…?" Anastasia is frightened over the newfound information.
"I don't know, Ana...but this can't be a coincidence. He has to have something to do with it."
Anastasia's eyes begin to burn with tears, but she bites her lip, keeping them at bay.
Christian closes her laptop and places it on the nightstand beside him before grabbing her and pulling her into a lying position with him, holding her tight against him.
"What am I going to do? Shouldn't I call the police or something?" Anastasia's head is spinning.
"If she was still missing, I would say to call them now, but there's nothing we can do for her now. I think you should wait until you go into work tomorrow and sit down with Mr. Roach and make a plan together. That way, it's the business that calls the police, instead of you."
"He's still going to know it's me, Christian."
He swallows hard. The thought of Jack Hyde coming for Anastasia makes him sick. "I'm going to tighten security, Anastasia. I know you're worried you'll feel stifled if Sawyer and Prescott are glued to your side, but considering the new information, we don't have a choice."
She shakes her head and buries her face into his bare chest. "No, I don't mind. I hate to say it, but I feel that it's necessary. I'm scared, Christian. If Jack comes after me… what's going to happen to the baby?"
"No. You can't think like that. We'll keep you safe. We'll tighten your security and after you speak to Roach, I'll call him myself about tightening security on the whole building. Once Hyde gets wind that we know, who knows what he'll do to SIP. Who's to say he won't show up to SIP on Tuesday with a gun, shooting up the place."
"Christian!"
He winces. "I'm sorry...I didn't mean to worry you more, but my point is that security needs to step it up."
Anastasia tries to keep her heart-rate and breathing under control, but she can't control the shaking her body is beginning to do.
"Oh, Ana…" Christian holds his girl as tight as he can without hurting her, hoping to stop her trembling. "Everything will be alright. I've got you. I won't let anything happen to you."
She nuzzles into his chest hair, breathing deeply. The warmth of his body and the smell of his skin is comforting. She just wants to get lost with him...under him.
"Christian?"
"Yes, love?"
"I need you."
He sighs in relief. "Me, too, baby." He rolls them until she's underneath him and tugs at her thong, slipping it down her thighs. She brings her legs up and together so he can pull them off, but when he gets them to her knees he stops and ducks down, his lips coming in contact with the ones between her legs.
A wave of pleasure shoots down both of her legs and she moans out.
His tongue swipes up her slit and he hums. "Fuck, you taste good." Sitting up, he rids her of the panties and throws them behind him before spreading her legs and diving back into her center. He wants to surround himself in Ana, bury himself inside her, and forget how fucked up the world really is at the moment.
Teaser? Let me know.