Chapter 21: Nixing the Board

HP-BTVS-HP-BTVS

Towards the end of the month the diary of Salazar Slytherin was 'found'. Sal had to rewrite it all into modern English, but it was worth it. He made sure to keep the original to validate the copy. It took most of March to do so, but he felt it was well worth the time. He was glad that his tale of how he met his wife, Luanne, was there. She had been a New Blood, only one wizard in her family tree, many times removed. They were instant friends upon her hiring as the Runes professor. It had been a whirlwind romance that had ended with three children, and many years of happy marriage. She had died from the dragon pox.

The diary hit the bookshelves and took the Wizarding World by storm. Most believed it to be fantasy, even with the note that stated it was from the original. Still, the women ate up the romance and fantasized about the debonair Salazar and the feisty Luanne. Many sighed at their less than dapper husbands and dreamed of riding off into the sunset on broomsticks.

Funny how things worked, the public thought the Boy-Who-Lived stories were true, but this was not. Harry didn't like the irony either.

After the book was published, Sal didn't know what to do with himself. Until he heard of the repression of werewolves. He then brushed up on DADA so that if anything happened to Remus, he'd take over. His time was well spent, as he let himself out as a tutor for the OWL and NEWT students.

Nicholas was over the moon to meet Sal. They spent night upon night together as Nicholas caught the man up on what had changed in potions and alchemy, and Sal showed Flamel some old recipes. Added to that, they set up a goal to cure lycanthropy. To say that they got along was putting it mildly.

Albus on the other hand did not trust the man. He felt that anyone with the last name Slytherin was not to be trusted. He too thought the book to be tripe. He thought the man was just trying to put his family name in a better light. He used his influence to make others see his way. He was determined that another Voldemort would not happen on his watch. He put a bug in a few people's ear, and soon rumor was spreading that the man could not be trusted.

Still, the man was in his castle and Albus hated it. However, his hands were tied. He attempted to trick the man into leaving but with his popularity, Sal wasn't biting.

When Sal found out about this, he laughed and said that his actions would speak louder than words. Still, he made sure to keep his nose clean and help as much as he could. His tutoring helped in that regard. He was an accomplished professor and was easy to get along with.

Dumbledore had cornered Harry once to ask about the Chamber, but he was disappointed when the boy told him that he had remained hidden until it was all over. The truth, to a degree. When Xander found out he went to the headmaster and told him off.

"I told you to leave Harry alone," Xander snapped at the old man, slamming his hands on the desk.

"I merely wanted to know what happened," Albus said, with his customary twinkle.

"I told you what happened, there was no reason for you to talk to Harry. Hell, the whole school knows what happened," the wolf-eyed man stated, throwing up his arms in frustration.

"I feel there is more to this story," the old man said, steepling his fingers in front of his face.

"What you were told was what happened. You trying to make that not true isn't going to change the story. This is your last warning, leave Harry alone," Xander said, then slammed his way out of the office.

Dumbledore was not a happy man. This person was ruining his plans left and right. He knew he was on thin ice, so he would just have to bide his time. Little did he know his time was almost up.

Hpbtvshpbtvs

One day, much to everyone 'in the know's' amusement, Harry, Slinky, Sal, and Norberta were talking by the Forest. Slinky had snuck out the back way and was hidden behind Norberta's enclosure. They chatted for hours in parseltongue and were seen laughing at jokes only they could understand.

It was shortly after that that Norberta was seen flying over the Forbidden Forest toasting the remaining Acromantulas. Hagrid was distraught, but Xander and Sal stood firm. The spiders were deadly and had no love for humans. They needed to go. Xander offered to find a place for Aragog, but the old spider had fled. They could only hope that he had left the forest. The arachnid was old, and probably would not breed another colony.

With this new duty, Norberta was happy to take up the job of forest security. With Slinky's help she now understood that if she protected the castle she would be fed and sheltered. The two could often be heard speaking to one another through the fence. Those that did hear them, thought that Slinky was just talking to Sal or Harry. They never went to see, because who would think that there was a giant snake roaming about.

Hpbtvshpbtvs

One day mid-April, Dobby came to Xander, while he and Sal were watching TV.

"Master Wolfy Kingy God, sir," the little guy started only to quickly change it to, "Master Xander, I is being telling yous that I is thinking that bad master is being the one who sent the book to Hogwarts," the small being said, wringing his spindly hands.

"Oh, do you know this for sure?" Xander asked, shutting off the TV so he could pay attention to the little guy. Much to Sal's protest.

Dobby nodded his head firmly and quickly. "I is being seeing it in old master's house. He was being making plans. It is being the reason that Dobby came to save the Great Harry Potter," he said shyly.

"When we asked you earlier you said you didn't know," Xander countered.

"Dobby knows, but he is remembering that books. Dobby is being seeing it in ex-master's hands," the little guy confessed, lowering his head in shame.

"Oh really," Xander drawled, quickly thinking over scenarios to make sure Lucius knew he knew. He didn't want to do the ice knife again.

"Hey, I have a question," Sal said, looking between Xander and Dobby. "How did that diary even get into the castle? I mean, there should be wards to warn you about stuff like that," he added thoughtfully. "We had them in my time, and you said you had an intent ward up."

"Good question. Joyce!" Xander called to the air.

"Yes," she said as she appeared.

"How did the diary get in the castle? We put intent wards up," the wolf-eyed man asked. "Sal said that there were wards to warn of things like that in his time," he added, pointing to the man, who nodded.

"The intent wards were mild, remember. We didn't want angsty teens setting them off. Only those who thought of harming someone immediately would trip them. When the diary was about in the castle all it did was make Blaise resent his mom. At least that's my theory. I think the only time it had overly evil thoughts was when it was in the Chamber, which I can't feel. Sal, we need to change that," she added as an afterthought. "As for the old wards, every headmaster/mistress has changed them over the years."

"I guess that makes sense," Xander said thoughtfully. "At least as much sense as anything to do with magic. Hey, Sal, you're a Rune's master, can you put up an evil object ward. That way we can nip stuff like this in the bud," he asked his new brother.

"Sure, easily done," Sal answered, inching his hand towards the remote.

Xander smacked the hand, put the remote on the other side of the couch and turned to the elf. "Dobby, do you know if Draco is the one who brought the diary in the school?" he asked, getting back to the main topic.

"Dobby is not being knowing," the little guy answered, lifting his head, and showing his wide innocent eyes. He was trembling a bit, like he was worried that he would be punished.

"Don't worry about it. It's not that important. I'll just have to keep an eye on that one," the wolf-eyed man said, waving it away. "Thanks for the info, dude. You can go back to what you do when you're not here," he added, giving Dobby a thankful smile.

"Dobby will," Dobby said and disappeared.

"What do they do, when they aren't serving their family?" Xander wanted to know.

"Clean," Sal said.

"Clean what?" was the confused question.

"Everything. They like cleaning," was the reply.

"Wow, really? Damn, I would've thought they would want to do something fun," the carpenter stated thoughtfully.

"That is their fun," Joyce said with a giggle.

"Huh," was the only reply.

"So, what are you going to do about this Lucius person?" Sal asked, giving up on the remote for the moment and settling on the conversation at hand.

"I think, I'm going to take on him and the Board at the same time," Xander answered with a wicked smile. "I can't scare him more than I already have. And I don't want to push it. So, yeah, I'll do both with less intimidation."

"Lovely," Joyce praised, while Sal laughed.

Hpbtvshpbtvs

Later that week, there was a Board meeting. Albus was ordered to attend, and Xander decided to tag along. He borrowed Harry's Cloak and snuck in behind the headmaster. The minutes were boring and the people pompous, and soon Xander was nodding off in a chair by the door.

"Now, to new business," Lucius stated importantly, making Xander more alert. "Headmaster Dumbledore, tell us what is going on in the school. Why were we not told about the state of emergency? It is our job to issue such, therefore you overstepped your bounds," the blond accused.

"I do not believe I was outside my remit. To my understanding, the charter for the Board is to help allocate funds for the school. Nowhere in this does it state that you have any control over emergencies," Albus said, stroking his beard in thought.

"There was a chance of lost revenue," came the puffed-up reply. "Therefore, it was in our remit," Lucius stated, shuffling papers as if to seem useful. "If the parents of the mud… muggleborn had pulled their children, the school might have closed, and we could have lost a great deal of money."

"We had to send many students home, and no revenue was lost," Dumbledore countered, stroking his beard.

"But they weren't muggleborn. Those families were not told," Malfoy insisted.

"That's the biggest pile of bullshit that I've ever heard," came a voice from near the door. "I personally told the Creevys that their son had been petrified, they were very understanding. Your argument doesn't hold water."

"Who said that?" demanded half the board.

"You guys seem to think you're essential to the running of my school," Xander said as he pulled off the cloak. "I see you as money grabbing assholes."

"Now see here, you can't talk to us like that..." a pompous man started, slamming his hand on the table.

"Yes, I can," Xander interrupted, "You're all idiots if you think you have any control over the school, which you don't. Now see, I think you guys are pretty much worthless. So, as owner of said school, I'm telling you to… how do you guys put it?... oh yeah, bugger off," he stated to the stunned group of men and women.

"Wha…"

"You're fired, dismissed, let go, sacked, not important enough to keep. I can keep going if you need more examples," the grinning man said, kicking his feet out in front of him and leaning the chair back against the wall.

"Now see here, good sir, I don't know who you are, but we are the Board of Governors, and we decide who stays and who goes," a man in dark blue stated.

"Nah, you guys are just puffed-up popinjays. You really shouldn't exist at all. I own the school, moron. I can do what I want, including, but not limited to, firing you. You can tell the Ministry that Hogwarts is independent, and that we don't need its money," came the casual reply. He grinned like a fool and started humming.

"How will you fund the school without Ministry money? I know the budget and what it takes to run Hogwarts. You won't last a week without us," Lucius sneered, picking some of the papers up and brandishing them as if to prove his point.

"Buzzzz, wrong. You see, you were never given the true assets," the wolf-eyed man laughed. "I know for a fact that we have more than enough money to run Hogwarts and possibly two other schools besides. However, I'm done talking to you, leave, and don't worry about Hogwarts again. It's no longer your problem," Xander stated as he stood.

"Now se…" Lucius started only to stop due to the extreme pain his shoulder was in.

Xander stood with his hand raised, he had just blasted the blond with a piercing hex. "I warned you, asshole. I told you if I found out you did anything to harm my school, I would take vengeance. Now, I don't have uncontroversial proof, but I do know you set the basilisk on the school. This is your final warning, leave my school alone. Next time, you die." And with that he threw on the Invisibility Cloak and open the door, but he didn't leave.

"Who does that man think he is?" demanded one of the governors as he looked to Dumbledore for answers.

"He is the owner of the school," Albus answered with slight reluctance as if he didn't want to give Xander that kind of power. "It is within his authority to do what he did. You would do well to heed his words. I have known him since Halloween last year, and I can tell you that he is not one to be trifled with." He stroked his beard as if to contemplate how to turn this in his favor.

"I will speak to the Minister about this," Lucius threatened as he attempted to heal his shoulder. "I won't stand for some muggle to come and change our ways. I've heard about electricity being installed in the school and I won't stand for it, I say. We must do something to stop this madness. What next? Muggles in the school?" he preached, looking at all his peers with demanding eyes.

'That's a great idea. I did tell Hermione's parents that I would implement Parent Day,' Xander thought as he listened to the idiots try and overturn his dismissal of them.

Soon enough, the windbags died down and left. Xander followed behind Albus. He wanted to see what the man would do. However, Dumbledore only went to his office and retired for the night. So, Xander took himself to the 'house'. He knew Rick would keep an ear out.

Joyce was there with the kids, and she was regaling them with some of the stories from Sunnydale. To say they were impressed was putting it mildly. Most of them were just glad that they didn't live there. Well, not Luna, she was fascinated… and taking notes.

Joyce looked up when Xander entered the room. "How did it go?" she asked, getting up off the couch and leading him to the kitchen, away from prying ears and eyes.

"Great, the Board is gone," the wolf-eyed man stated, sitting at the table, and accepting a mug of hot chocolate.

"Good. I never liked the hold they have over the school." She sat across from him with her own cup.

"Hey, Joyce, I have an idea. I know you're going to check me for curses for suggesting this, but can you bring Spike here? I hate the guy, but even I can't fault his ability to make people's lives miserable. I want to sic him on Lucius," he asked, rubbing his neck. He had no idea where this was coming from, but deep down inside he felt that maybe, just maybe, the guy deserved someplace better than his reality.

"You're right, I want to check you for spells. Spike, really?" she asked, putting her cup down so she didn't spill it, she was so surprised. She liked Spike, but knew Xander hated all vampires, Angel and Spike especially.

"It's just a thought. I mean, he is the Big Bad," Xander said, shrugging his shoulders.

"Let me think about it. Bringing Spike here could have major repercussions. Like introducing kangaroos to America. It could upset the entire Vampire community," she said, thinking hard on it. "I, unlike you, like Spike, but he is a different breed of vampire."

"Yeah, I didn't think of it like that. Maybe if you give him magic too," he suggested. "That might start a whole new type of vampire. Like Angel or soul having Spike."

"The vampires here have souls, which is why I'm worried," she explained, waving her hand as if it was an insignificant detail.

"They do?" was the confused question. "I didn't read that. And I studied up on them as soon as I got here." It was one of the first things he had done. He knew they were nothing like the demons they had fought in Sunnydale, but soul having. He didn't know that.

"They don't write about it, because everyone knows it," Joyce said, taking another sip of cocoa. "The local vampires are not inherently evil, but they have lower morals. It's more like their souls are stained, not taken." She was still going over the ramifications of bringing Spike here in her head.

"Oh, still, I do get what you're saying though. It's just a thought," he said, drinking long from his cup.

"A good one. Let me think on it. I'll let you know in a few days." With that the two sat sipping their hot chocolate.

"Xander, come and tell us about the time the teacher almost ate you," Harry called from the living room.

"Which time?" Xander laughed and joined the kids, telling them about Ms. French, leaving out the sexy bits. Soon enough it was time for bed, and they all said good night and went to sleep.

The next day Hogwarts received a visitor. The Minister of Magic decided it was time to put that uppity Harris in his place. He slammed into the Great Hall, followed by Amelia and some woman in a pink getup. "Harris, I should have you arrested!" he bellowed as he walked down the middle of the room.

"Great Zeus, what the hell are you wearing?" the unperturbed man asked, looking at the large amounts of lime green the other man adorned. Though, he had to admit it matched nice with the pink thing following him. Who knew all his time with girls would make that statement come easy?

"What?!" the impotent man stuttered, then he cleared his throat and decided to ignore the slight. "Never mind all that, who do you think you are, dismissing the Board of Governors? I don't know what power you think you have, but you will reinstate them, or I will be cutting off all funds to this school," he threatened, pointing a finger at the completely relaxed Xander.

"Okay, we don't need your funds anyway," Xander shrugged and went back to his discussion with Sal.

"Hem, hem," came an irritating noise, which was ignored.

Fudge stood there in shock. He was so shocked his hat fell from his hands.

Amelia was sitting with her niece, Susan, and chatting away, while her boss made a fool of himself.

The rest of the staff took Xander's cue and resumed their meals. All but Dumbledore, who was also staring at the wolf-eyed man in shock. "Surely, you cannot be serious?" he said quietly. "We need those funds," he added, worry laced his voice.

"No, we really don't," Xander said clearly. He waved his hands to the door of the antechamber and a goblin came out. "This is Steelblade, he is in charge of the school's accounts. I called him here this morning to prove my point. Steelblade, tell these two we're cool," he requested as he waved the goblin over.

"I have gone over the accounts and can tell you quite concisely, that this school will never run out of resources. Even with all the upgrades and improvements, the books are so far in the black it would take rebuilding the school three times over to run out," the goblin stated precisely, carrying a large ledger in his arms, open to the last page.

"Then why did we never see these funds?" Albus asked, perturbed. "It is vital that I have all the pieces of information if I'm going to run the school."

"I can answer that," Joyce said, standing to be heard. "I've done a lot of investigating these last few months, and I found out that Headmaster Black wanted to get into the good books of the Ministry, so he doctored the budget to make it appear that the school was floundering. I'm not sure if he wanted to embezzle the remaining money, but he wouldn't have been able to if he tried. Still, this caused the goblins to seal up the accounts to the barest assets to run the school. When Black died, he took his secrets with him, not even his portrait could reveal them." She looked at Albus and then Fudge with a lifted eyebrow, just daring them to argue with her.

"And the goblins did not explain this to us, why?" was Dumbledore's question, a perturbed look on his face.

"The next headmaster never asked," Steelblade answered, shuffling papers to get to the right date. "By that time the Ministry had its hooks firmly in the school." He found the page he was looking for and showed it to the headmaster.

"Hem, hem," came that annoying noise. The pink monstrosity looked to the goblin with great disgust. "And we are to take your word for this?" she asked sweetly, as if saccharin was produced in her mouth. Overly sweet and false.

"You," Xander said, pointing directly at the woman, "I don't like. Get off my property and don't come back," he demanded. Joyce smiled and waved her hand, and the woman was gone. "Look, Fudge, I don't know what you thought you'd accomplish here, but I don't want or need your money. Now, if you don't have anything important to say, I will bid you good day," he added, and once again resumed his meal.

The man sputtered and postured, but when he looked around, he noted that no one was paying the least bit of attention to him. So, he picked his hat off the floor, slammed it on his head, and stomped out of the Great Hall. Children's laughter followed.

Amelia sighed and got up from the Hufflepuff table. She waved at the Head Table and followed her boss.

It took two weeks to implement, but Xander got the notice out that the last week of school would be Parent Week. All parents were invited to could come and talk to the professors about their children's schooling.