Chapter 30: Bold Moves
HP-BTVS-HP-BTVS
Xander sent the letter to Augusta and got a reply. He went to her house on Saturday.
"Greetings, Madam Longbottom," he said, when he was shown into the parlor. She was a formidable looking older woman, with tightly pulled back hair, and thin lips that were pursed in disapproval. Her outfit, like most of the wizarding world, was outdated, and pristine. "Thank you for seeing me. I won't take up much of your time."
The parlor was well appointed, and looked like a very simple setting, with only the small circular table, two cast-iron chairs, and a fainting couch on the side. There were small tasteful statues and pictures everywhere.
"Mr. Harris," she acknowledged, with a slight nod of her head. She waved him to sit in the chair across from her. "You wanted this meeting," she added, picking up the teapot to pour.
"I just learned that I could hold Harry's seat on the Wizengamot," Xander said, taking his eyes off the statue of a small boy, "and we're thinking of going Grey," he said, nodding his thanks for the tea, and taking the cup she was holding out to him. "We, and I mean a few of my fellow members, were hoping we could talk you into switching."
"And what would be your platform?" she inquired, taking a sip of her own tea. She had been thinking about it for a while. With Dumbledore leading the Light, it was not to her taste. However, the Grey was a bit more pragmatic than she liked.
"We'd like to get rid of some of the more restrictive laws on creatures. We'd also like to get the muggleborn represented, if not on the Wizengamot then via the law. It is our opinion that they are being repressed, and that is not okay with my ward," he stated, putting his cup down and crossing his legs, with his foot on his knee. "Other than that, our thoughts don't differ from the Light side. Though we might be more prone to harsher punishments and the death penalty," he added as an afterthought. "That said, we'd like to do something about the Dementors. Well, Harry and my friends would. We feel they are demons, and you can't control them."
"I am not sure that even with my vote those things can happen," she said, thinking hard on what he was representing. "I too dislike the Dementors. However, what would you replace them with?"
"There are three of us taking up our seats in the next meeting. That and I'm sure that if you switch then more will too," Xander said, putting his elbow on the arm of the chair and resting his head in his fist. He was trying to come off as casual, so that she didn't think he was trying to intimidate her. "As for the Dementors, we were thinking the goblins could be contracted."
"You have given me much to think on. I can say we agree on a few things. However, I will have to talk to Neville. After all, it is his seat," she said, noting his relaxed demeanor. It was a different approach than most. They usually went for intimidation or bribes.
"I'll see you at the meeting," Xander said, getting up and bowing a little. "Thanks for the tea," he added, giving her a winning smile.
"You can see your way out?" she asked, nodding in his direction.
"Yeah, don't bother yourself," he said, sketching a salute and heading to the door. He knew that there would be many letters passing between grandmother and grandchild. He hoped that Neville would be able to persuade his gran.
Hpbtvshpbtvs
The Wizengamot was just what Sirius said it was. A bunch of old men who thought they ruled the world. Okay, so there were younger men and a few women, but still. The start of the first meeting was boring. At least until Sirius, Sal, and Xander claimed their seats. Or in the case of Xander, claimed proxy.
"Is there any new business?" Albus said after the Minutes had been read. He looked to the clerk as if he wanted the man to say no. However, he could see the three men waiting and knew it was futile.
"Yes, we have three persons who state they have seats to claim," the scribe stated as he shuffled some parchment around and read off the new business one.
"Let them come forward," was the imperious command. He looked at the men like they were taking up his precious time.
Sal, Sirius and Xander all came to the front. They were all smiling smug smiles. They didn't care what Albus thought.
"Sirius Black and Sal Slytherin, I understand why you are here, but for the life of me I cannot say why Mr. Harris is," Albus stated, running his hand down his beard, and peering over his spectacles.
"I'm claiming proxy for the Potter seat," Xander said, shrugging his shoulder as if it was obvious.
"But you're American," someone shouted.
"There's no law against me claiming proxy," was the casual reply.
"There bloody well should be," someone else grumbled.
"Be that as it may, I am the proxy for the Potter seat," Dumbledore said, sitting up to his impressive height.
"No, you just wish you were. As his adopted father, I can claim the seat," Xander argued, bringing out the papers to prove his point. "According to both the magical and the non-magical government, Harry is my son."
The clerk took the papers and read through them. "These are legitimate," he said after casting a spell on them that only clerks knew.
"Let's just get on with it. I'm sure there is a vow that needs said," Sal said tired of the back and forth.
"Indeed, there is," Dumbledore said, deflating a bit. "Lord Black, and Lord Slytherin, repeat after me; I, state your name, do hereby take up the seat of my family on this august body. I will do my duty to uphold the laws of my country, and see justice served to the best of my ability."
Sal and Sirius did as told, holding up their wands in their right hand. The vow took and a bright light emanated from both wands.
"Mr. Harris, repeat after me; I, your name, do hear by take up the Potter seat as proxy on this august body. I will do my duty to uphold the laws of this country and see justice served to the best of my ability. Until such time as Harry Potter can take his seat," Dumbledore said, almost hoping that it didn't take, because the man was American.
Xander did as asked, and held up his hand, since he still didn't have a wand, and a bright light flashed, showing that the vow took. "I have dual citizenship," he explained to everyone.
"Well, it seems that we were accepted," Sal said with an air of arrogance.
"You may take your seats," Albus said and waved his hand in the general direction of the seats.
They looked in the gallery to see where they would be seated. In the third row there were three empty seats, so Sal headed up there. Sirius and Xander followed.
Albus looked like he just sucked a particularly bitter lemon but carried out his duty anyway. "To which block are you casting for?" he asked the three.
"Grey," Sal said, making the chair he sat in glow and then the backing turned a light grey color. Voices started murmuring.
"Grey," Sirius said, his chair doing the same. The crowd was starting to get restless as frantic whispers broke out.
"Grey," Xander stated, knowing just how much that was going to cause people to talk. And talk they did. The whole room practically exploded with noise. Everyone was yelling over their neighbor trying to be heard.
"Silence!" the Chief Warlock bellowed, creating banging noises with his wand. It took a few minutes to get them under control, but soon enough they quieted down. "Mr. Harris, the Potter family has always been of the Light."
"Yeah, I talked to Harry, and we talked to a lot of other people, and he decided that Grey fit his views better," Xander explained, as calmly as he could.
"Why was I not consulted?" Albus asked, a bit hurt that he wasn't involved.
"Why would you be?" Xander said, a hint of steel in his voice. Daring the old man to cross the line. "Speaking of which, you've been illegally voting the Potter vote since the death of the Potters. I want to see them. I will discuss them with Harry, and we'll see if any need to be revoted on." He folded his arms as if to say, 'fuck with me, I dare you.'
"I beg your pardon?" the old man said, greatly affronted, as if he would ever vote incorrectly. The nerve of this man.
"Yes, illegally. You were never Harry's guardian, not legally. I know that the Potters did not name you such. I have their wills," Xander said, glaring at the old man. He once more produced a few papers, which he floated down to the clerk.
"These are also legitimate," the man said, putting them in the file with the others.
"The Wizengamot…" was as far as the Chief Warlock got.
"Should never have interfered, they have now set a precedent. However, it was not their right to name you anything," the wolf-eyed man said, now glaring at the others protesting.
The room exploded with noise again. This time yelling at each other and Xander.
"Silence," Dumbledore said again. Then he turned to Xander. "I'm sure we can come to an agreement."
"Nope, I want those papers," Harry's dad said, turning his attention back to Albus.
"Are you sure that's necessary?" a not overly concerned Albus asked. He figured that Harry would side with him, after all, he only did what was necessary.
"Yes, and I'm sure Sirius feels the same way," Xander said, looking to Sirius to confirm.
"I do," Black said, standing next to Xander in a united front. "You had no right to let Malfoy sit in my seat. Speaking of which, get out, Malfoy. You are not a member of this body." He glared at the man who was glaring back at him.
"I am a Malfoy," Lucius stated, gripping his cane tight. He had been hoping that he would be overlooked.
"And, what does a French family have to do with a British Wizengamot?" Black said, lifting his eyebrow at the man.
"The man at your side is American," was the rebuttal.
"And like you he is a Proxy. When Harry comes of age, he'll step down. Just like you're going to do now," Sirius said, his eyebrow still adorning the top of his forehead.
Malfoy sniffed, got up from his seat and left. He was a member of the sacred twenty-eight, but he was not a member of the Wizengamot. Something that rankled him fiercely.
"Now that that is taken care of, are there anymore new notices?" Dumbledore asked the clerk.
"Yes," the clerk said, rustling through papers. "There is a change of alignment," he said, looking at Augusta.
She rose and waited for Albus to acknowledge her.
"Augusta?" came the questioning inquiry from the Chief Warlock.
"At this time the Longbottoms would desire to be recognized as Grey," she said, in a prim manner. Her hands folded in front of her and her face stern.
"Are you sure?" Albus asked, not liking where this could go. More and more people that have been wavering might follow her example. That would not be good for him.
"We are. I have discussed this with Neville, and he agrees," she said with a nod of her head. She sat having said all she wanted and nodded to many of those she knew would change soon. Since Dumbledore took over as leader, the Light side had been shaky at best.
"Very well," Dumbledore sighed, then asked, "Is there anymore new business?"
"Not at this time," was the answer after a bit of paper shuffling.
"Then let us continue," the old man said, and continue they did.
"I have an issue," Amelia said, standing to be recognized.
"Oh?" Albus said, looking at the Head of the DMLE.
"We need to discuss reparations for Mr. Black. It was the Ministry that put an innocent man behind bars, they should pay a monetary compensation," she said, looking around the room to gauge how that was being received. When she noted that there was going to be protest, she added, "The press will have a field day if we don't."
That shut quite a few up, Fudge being the most notably quiet. The loss of his backer left him wrongfooted.
"I would only ask that I get the pay I would have received as a Hit Wizard for the years I was incarcerated," Sirius said, also standing and giving everyone a winning grin. "After all, it was the prior administration that screwed up," he added, not bringing Dumbledore into it at this time. Politics was a dangerous dance.
"I agree," the old man said, calling for a vote.
The numbers were crunched, and Sirius got what he asked for, which was quite a lot of money.
The meeting continued on.
The three new members were bored out of their minds with the discussion of how thick cauldron bottoms should be. They were very impartial about the whole thing. The whole Neutral section was on a 'live let live' point of view. If a person was dumb enough to use a thin bottomed cauldron, they deserved to have it melt.
After the meeting that led to nothing actually being accomplished, they mingled and politicked.
"Can someone explain to me why a bunch of law makers are arguing over the thickness of cauldron bottoms?" Xander asked no one in particular. He was fighting off a yawn as it was.
"Because a thin bottom can be devastating," one person said, like he was talking to a child.
"No, I get that, but shouldn't that be the job of one of the departments of the Ministry?" he inquired, like he was talking to a child. Tit for tat, and all that. "Something like the Department of Magical Implementation, or something?"
"They couldn't make up their mind," grumbled the same man.
"Then fire them and get competent people," Xander said, confused as to why that was an issue.
"They're purebloods," was the protest.
"They're what now?" Xander said, turning to Sirius for an explanation. He knew what a pureblood was, but not why it was an issue.
"Purebloods make up the Ministry. You won't find a Muggleborn working here. Maybe a few half-bloods," Sirius said, with a shrug of his shoulder.
"Let me get this straight, you'd rather waste my time and the taxpayer's money to do an incompetent's job, rather than hire useful people?" he asked, completely gobsmacked.
"Well, yes," the man said, looking at Xander like he was simple.
"Your country is doomed," was all Xander said as he turned to leave.
"Here now, that was uncalled for," the man said to his retreating back.
"Nope, he's right," Sal said, also watching Xander leave. "As long as nepotism and prejudice prevail, you will be doomed." He too turned and walked away. Sirius right behind him.
Hpbtvshpbtvs
Friday came and Xander was once more at the Ministry. He made his way up to the DMLE to pick up Amelia. She was just finishing the last of her paperwork, and on the phone when he was shown in.
She held up a finger and said into the phone, "Minister, can we pick this up on Monday?... okay, good, I will see you then." And with that she hung up. "Right on time," she told Xander, putting her quill in the cup that held more quills and pens.
"Yup," he said, sitting on a chair and letting her straighten up her office. It only took a few minutes, and they were on their way to the exit. Outside the phone booth, Xander took charge. He had a car waiting that he had hired for the night. Showing her to the passenger's seat, he went to the driver's side and slid in.
"The place we're going to isn't fancy or anything, but we'll get a nice meal, and they serve cocktails," he said as he pulled into traffic.
"Sounds delightful," she said, settling back in the seat. It had been a long week. Cocktails sounded good.
"Just relax, this is a time for you to unwind," the one-eyed man said, driving swiftly through the streets of London. He hated city driving, no matter what country you are in. It was nothing like the streets of Sunnydale, which were hardly ever full. In the city you had to be hyper aware of your surroundings. Soon enough, and without incident, they pulled into the restaurant's parking lot. The Ivy was the name, it was a stylish yet not posh place to eat. "Here we are," Xander said, putting the car in park.
He got out and helped her out like a gentleman. They only had to wait a minute for their table and were soon looking at the menu. There was some Italian food along with typical British fare. Xander ordered the Shepard's Pie, having only ever had the American version. Amelia ordered a pasta dish, and some wine.
"So, how was work?" Xander asked as he sipped some water.
"I don't want to talk about it," she said, then asked, "Did you enjoy your first Wizengamot meeting?"
"Gods no," was his reply. "Do they ever get anything worthwhile done?"
"Sometimes, there are laws that come up for vote, but they have to be weighed by a committee before they are brought forward, then they have to be picked apart by the Wizengamot, then they get voted on. The cauldron bottom thickness has been in debate for months," she explained with a sigh.
"Well, I'll wait for something I can add my two cents to, or pence, or knuts, whichever. Tell me about yourself," he said, changing the subject.
The rest of the date was well spent learning about one another. Amelia had a great time just relaxing and talking about herself and her family. Xander did much the same but left out his family. They weren't worth mentioning. He did talk about Joyce, Buffy, Dawn, Willow, and all his other friends. Though he did leave out the supernatural since they weren't a part of this world. Not like they were in his old one at any rate.
The date ended on a good note, and plans were made for the next one. Xander was amazed at how good a time he had. She was a bit older than he, but that didn't seem to matter to either of them, when all was said and done.
It was a happy man that appeared in the 'house' that night. After he had dropped her and the car off, he simply Winked home.
Hpbtvshpbtvs
The next morning everyone was in for a surprise, when shy little Harry asked to speak to the household, bar Spike. They all were sitting in the kitchen/dining room around the table.
"Okay, Harry, we're here. What's up?" Xander asked, giving the boy an encouraging smile.
"Okay, so, ummm, I've been working on something for a while now," the shy boy started and gave everyone a weak smile. "It started when Luna was kidnapped. I got to thinking on how to protect her, and all the girls I know. Or even don't know. Ummm," he stated, getting some 'get on with it' vibes from his audience.
"Go ahead, honey," Joyce said, giving him a gentle smile and a wink.
"So, I got to thinking, ummm, about the Fidelius charm and how it could help. Here let me show you," he said, getting a bit more courage. "How many hands do I have?" he asked his father.
"One," came the confused answer. "Haven't you always had one?"
"My right hand is at the end of my right arm," Harry said, pointing to the hand in question.
"Oh," came the collective response.
"Perfect," Joyce said, clapping her hands in joy.
"Ummm, so if I can hide my, ummm, hand, then I can hide, ummm, private parts," Harry said, his face burning red.
"Can you teach it?" Xander asked, seeing how in a school like this it would be a good thing.
"Yeah, but let me finish," the teen said, still blushing like crazy. He wasn't the only one, all the teens were beet red. "I, ummm, have a loophole for mediwitches," he said, pulling out a piece of paper. It had the pictures of a lily and a stag. "The lily is for girls and the stag is for boys. All the mediwitch has to have is the correct spell, which I will only tell Madam Pomfrey," Harry said, his voice firm.
"We should go to the medical wing and see if this works. Xander, do you feel like volunteering?" Joyce asked, in a honey sweet voice, as if daring him to say no.
"Of course," the man mumbled. Just when he got his love life started, he had to hide his willy.
They all Winked to the hospital wing, startling Madam Pomfrey.
Xander went behind a curtain and came back out wrapped in a sheet from the waist down. He then laid down on the bed and waited.
"Madam Pomfrey, you're going to want to see this," Sal called, grinning at Xander's discomfort.
She bustled over.
Harry told her the same as he told the others and then he exposed a small part of Xander's hip. He then put his hand on there and incanted the spell. For a second everyone was confused. There on the hip was the picture of a stag. They all felt like they had forgotten something.
"Dad, you have to say clearly where your missing part is," the teen told the man.
Xander sighed, not wanting to say it out loud so he motioned Joyce over. He pulled the sheet up further, to hide his hidden willy.
She came and bent over to hear what the man had to say.
"My penis is between my legs," he whispered to her.
"Oh," she said, then giggled.
"Madam Pomfrey, can you check the tattoo?" Harry asked, pointing to where it was.
She lifted the sheet, and saw what Harry wanted her to see. She turned to the teen and nodded.
"Okay, here is what you do," Harry said, leaning over and whispering the spell in her ear.
With a silent casting she was now privy to Xander's secret. She was in awe. "Harry, do you know what this could mean?" she asked, her face was one of astonishment.
"That's why I did it," he confessed.
"Harry, am I going to have to tell this secret every time I want to have sex?" Xander asked bluntly.
"Only once for each woman," the blushing boy said, not wanting to think about his dad having sex.
"Okay, teach it to Poppy, so the girls can get their own tattoos," his dad said, sitting up and going behind the curtain again. "Wait, only Luna, we have to ask Hermione's parents if it's okay with them. I don't see why it wouldn't be, but she's not my child."
Harry couldn't get any redder, but he tried. He told the spell to Madam Pomfrey and then booked it out of the wing. Neville, not knowing why he was embarrassed, followed. The adults laughed at the boys.
"I will write up a permission slip for everyone in the castle under seventeen," Poppy said, turning to lead Luna to a bed curtained off. "I'll send off a message for those over."
"So, what did he do to you?" Sal asked, sitting on the foot of the bed, while Xander, now dressed, and Joyce stood by the window.
"I'm not going to tell you, but it has to do with my love life," was all the answer Xander would give on his hidden willy. "It was an experiment, and it worked. Now it's going to work for Luna and hopefully all the females in school. Though going by what Poppy said, the boys too."
"Damn that kid is good," Sal said, nodding to Xander in pride.
"Let's get out of here," Xander said, pushing off the windowsill and heading out of the room. He had a secret to tell, but only one other person was going to hear it.
The males left the room and Poppy spelled Luna with the Lily Charm.
Her thoughts were that this would change the world.