Alrighty so I've been addicted to the song Why by Shawn Mendes, so almost all of this chapter and some of whatever else I'm writing has been influenced by that song. I hope you guys enjoy and if you want to listen to that while reading it, it'll get you more into the mood of why I'm writing the way that I am right now. This whole idea is actually completely based on the lyrics and I hope you guys enjoy it and if so, I'm totally up for a second part. All in all, this has a musician Jim and actress Claire AU that I've been DYING to finish but now I have the fuel for it.

This is a little OOC due to the age difference and stuff, but either way, I hope you enjoy it.

I know a girl, she's like a curse
We want each other, no one will break first
So many nights, trying to find someone new
They don't mean nothing compared to her.

I wrote the last line as the bus jostled me within my seat. My best friend and manager not far from me as I hear his light snoring echoing against the window and filling the tour bus both gently as well as annoyingly. It was better than just listening to the dreading silence as I wrote within my lyric book.

It was also better than being left alone with my thoughts as usual.

I shook my head as I decided to look out the window beside me as the rain patted delicately against the glass. It's not that I have dark thoughts. It's the fact that they always lead me to what I've been feeling as if I'm missing a piece of me. Ever since I met her it's as if all my roads lead to where we should be connected. It's been that way since we were in high school and now as twenty-four-year-olds, I find myself in the same predicament.

I'm still the love-sick friend that's desperately wanting more as she's acting as if the signs aren't obvious. Why can't we just get over ourselves? Why do we do this to each other?

I hit my head against my notepad as I caught myself thinking the same as fucking always. Why can't I just be happy being her friend? I don't even know if she even feels the same, so why do I act as I do?

"You're probably my favorite person." I smiled back at the Latina as she laughed at herself. "I know, I know, it's cheesy, but it's true Jim. You get me when no one else does and I appreciate it. You're always there when I need you and you don't remind me every now and again that I have a quota to meet. I love that I can be myself with you." She tucked a strand of her hair behind her hair like she would when we were teens and somehow my heart goes into overdrive all the same. I chuckled back at her as she glances up to meet my eyes. The sunset beside us makes her chocolate eyes seem as if they were melting me slowly.

"You're my favorite person too, Claire."

God, how was I lucky to meet her? If it wasn't for her, I wouldn't be singing or writing. If it wasn't for how when we were teens that she used to push me out of my comfort zone as if the walls surrounding it were meant to be broken, I wouldn't be who I am. She talked me into acting with her to get self-confidence. She encouraged me to sing after I sang for her once out of a dare. She bought me my first lyric book with the first page being a letter of pure gratitude of me showing her something I never showed anyone else.

She was the strength I needed to believe in myself. She was what I needed in general. Without her, I don't know where I would be.

I looked over to where Toby was sleeping once more to see him now blissfully wearing a smile as he had a blanket up to his neck.

Where either of us would be.

Still doesn't answer why we put each other through hell all the time though. Even her friends always tell me that she's interested, yet I'm always the one worrying that she'll just brush me off.

"Ms. Nuñez! Ms. Nuñez! Your audience would love to know if you and Jim Lake are dating?" I froze at the question as we tried to enter the car behind where she wanted to meet up after she finished up on set for her new film. I had the car door in my hand to help her get in, but now I felt as if I could freeze there for the rest of my life.

Yet all she did was smile and wave before sliding into the car.

A smile and a wave.

I pulled myself together and gave them a smile before entering the car after her and closing the car door. I looked over to Claire to see that she had a beaming smile on her face.

"Paparazzi, am I right?"

I placed my hand on my chest as the memory flooded my brain. That was actually when I decided to try to move on past this crush that was going nowhere. But damn, try was the major word within that sentence. I knew that if I brought up my feelings to her, she would brush it off like she did with the paparazzi and I didn't want to hurt like that if I knew the outcome already. So, I became something that I regret with every piece of me.

My eyes strained as I grabbed my phone that was vibrating on the nightstand. I picked it up and held it to my ear without seeing who was the one calling.

"Hello?" My voice croaked as I knew I made it hoarse from the night before.

"Jim? Where are you? Are you alright?" I smiled softly as I rubbed my eyes clean of the guck that filled the corners of them.

"Of course I'm okay. Why do you ask?"

"Maybe because you were supposed to meet me here at Darci's party and you're nowhere to be seen?"

Fuck.

"Fuck."

"Fuck indeed, mister. Please tell me you didn't forget." I pulled the sheets off me that kept me modest as I grabbed my jeans off the floor and slipped them on after putting my socks back on.

"No, I just overslept. You of all people know what jetlag can do that to you. It's not an excuse though. I should have just sucked it up." I heard a giggle on the other line and I felt my heartbreak as I lied to her.

"It's no big deal. Just get here soon, alright? You're the person that helps me keep my sanity when it comes to all these stuck up Hollywood people."

"I promise, I'll be there soon." We hung up shortly after that before I put my phone in my front pocket. I felt hand place themselves on my shoulders as I sat back down on the edge of the bed.

"I don't know who that was, but whoever it is can wait a little longer. Right baby?" I never looked back to her as I slipped my shoes back on and picked up my button-down shirt off the floor. I slipped the shirt up onto my arms but she tried to pull the sleeves back down. "Awe, come on! They can't be worth that much to you. Right?"

"It's my best friend. I can't leave her hanging." I stood up and immediately put my shirt on the rest of the way and started to button it together. I heard the girl scuff at me before I turned to look at her. I knew her as a friend of a friend within the record label, but I couldn't remember her name front the top of my head. All I could remember from hours before was being six drinks in after a performance a couple of states over and seeing her soon after. I also remember her being the person that has been trying to seduce me for quite a bit and I think the drinks helped her achieve that.

"You mean that Nuñez girl, right? What does she got that I don't?" I felt a rage fill within me as I buttoned the third from the top button and decided to leave it at that. I gave her a glare before exiting the room.

"Don't you dare speak of her like that again."

All I remember from the rest of that conversation was the fact I told her to leave my house before I finished getting ready or we were going to have a problem. I knew she hated me due to that, but I didn't care for how she spoke about Claire. Once I arrived at the party, incredibly late, Claire gave me a smile that made the struggle against the unnamed woman worth it.

"So, what really kept you, hotshot?" I rolled my eyes at Claire as I crossed my arms over my chest.

"I already told you, Nuñez. I overslept."

"And I know you don't really sleep so quick your lying, James." I saw a mischievous gleam sparkle in her eyes. She knew I hated my real name but she'd use it as her weapon of choice to get what she wanted from me.

"I had a little help this time. Why do you think I won't touch the drinks here? I know my limit."

"Whatever you say, James."

"Stop calling me that, Nuñez." I watched as she gave me a knowing smile as she placed her hands on her hips.

"Make me, hotshot." I shook my head at her with a matching smile.

"I'll leave you here alone."

"Oh god, I'm sorry alright just leave me alone with Jennifer every again."

I laughed to myself as I rested the lyric book in my lap. For someone that has dreamed of being an actress for years, she was never one to enjoy the limelight of it. She'd rather disappear into the background than be on the cover of magazines. As someone that was forcibly on them every other week, I never understood what the big deal was until she sat down and explained it to me.

"It's like, everyone knows me for how I look but never for my work. It just always reminds me that I'll be the subject of their eye for a couple of years and then I'll be replaced like any other actress. Women never last long in this industry, Jim, we have expiration dates. And if mine is going to be broadcasted to the world, I want it to be through my work and not through pictures."

I sat there, staring at the chocolate eyed Latina with a weight in my chest and words trying to force themselves out into the open, but I tried my damnest to keep them contained.

I'll never judge you.

You'll never expire to me.

Is that why you try so hard to make our outings secret?

All of this was ringing through my head as I stared at her with a dull ache in my chest. After a little while, I felt my grasp on my control slip as one of my thoughts decided to let themselves known.

"They're nothing compared to you." I watched as she lifted her head slowly and looked over to me as if I said something she had never heard before. I doubted that as I remembered how many guys wanted her attention when we were in school. Especially now.

"Thanks, Jim, but you and I both know the industry doesn't think that-"

"But I do." I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding before I continued. "And who give a damn about that industry says? I know I sure as hell don't. You're Claire Nuñez. You shouldn't let anyone else's thoughts about you change who you are or what you do." I just remember the small but loving smile she gave before she reached out and wrapped her arms around my neck in a hug.

"And this is why you're my favorite person."

I looked down at the page I was writing on, seeing the complete set of lyrics I had written about all that was now running through my mind once more. The memories of her and I run deep within my writings. It's gotten to the point that I know every line that I write is somehow about her. As if she's always dancing in my mind. Like a muse I'll never completely captivate. For God's sake, I even wrote about her singing even though everyone knows she's terrible at it.

"I can feel you close to me~!" I chuckled at Claire swung her head back and forth as she sang well out of key. Dancing around her dressing room that she had snuck me into as she was getting ready for her final scene. She was now swinging her hips by herself as her eyes were closed and her voice still tried it's best to succeed against the raising melody line. "Even if you're nowhere to be seen!" I felt my breath hitch a little as I sat there watching her.

Even when she's terrible at something, she makes it captivating.

I didn't realize until I felt her tugging on my hands to stand up with her that she had brought herself over to me. "Come on! You're gonna let me dance on my own?" I gave her a sly smile as I rose up to my feet.

"I'm not supposed to be here, remember?"

"So what? I know you love this song so move your ass!" She spun herself as she stepped back to continue her swaying. "Come on! I know that choreography you've been going through has taught you a lot more than you used to know."

"Can we never speak about my 'bad dancer' stage? Because I rather forget about it."

"Then join me! Prove my memory wrong."

It didn't take much longer after that for her to get me to join her. Even if we did get caught like we would when we had late-night dance parties in her room when we were in high school. Her parents never really cared for me after that.

"We're here everybody!" The bus driver's voice rang out as it pulled me from my thoughts. I closed my lyric book and placed it into my bag as I stood up with ease while Toby's groggy complaints were to the left of me.

"We're already back in LA? I've most of been out for at least six hours then." I chuckled at Toby as I grabbed my guitar case off the top carrier space.

"Well, it was only the two of us today on the bus. If you remember, the rest of the crew stayed back in San Jose for a well-deserved break."

"Why did we take the bus back home anyway? We could have stayed with them and give poor Craig up there a break." I only shook my head with a smile as I made my way up to the man in question.

"Because Darci, you know, your wife, would lose her mind if we weren't home when you promised." I gave a smile to my long time tour driver as I handed him an envelope with his name on it. "Thank again, Craig. Here's something extra for all the help." The older man gave me a smile as he took it gently from me as if it would shatter like glass.

"And this is why you're my favorite musician to work for." I gave him a laugh as I fixed my bag straps on my arms.

"Tell the family my regards."

"Will do, kiddo." I got off the bus with a small stretch as I looked up to the still darkened sky. The rain had since ended, but the gloomy look was still evident within the scenery. I heard a small huff beside me as I looked over to see Toby with his phone out before him.

"Alrighty. We have a couple of days of easy living before we have anything major to attend. Take some much-needed rest, my friend." He nudged me in the shoulder even though I still loomed over my long term friend. "You've earned it."

"Thanks Tobes, but you've all people know that's difficult for me."

"Doesn't mean you shouldn't try, hotshot."

"Now you're sounding like Claire."

"Who sounds like me?" I whipped my head over to see the smiling girl in question.

"What are you doing here?" I gave her a large smile as I heard the bus behind us take it's leave.

"I heard from Toby you guys were heading back early. Figured I'll stop by to see how it went since my lasted filming shoot is down the road." I flashed Toby a knowing glare as he carried on about grabbing his things together like it was nothing. I looked back to Claire as she kept speaking, seeing how she was a lot closer than she was before. "How did it go? Gave them one hell of a show?"

"I hope so." She flashed me another smile as she reached up and wrapped her arms around my neck as she has so many times before. I instantly reached, reciprocating the action.

"I know you did. Welcome home, hotshot." As I held her there, the words I wrote before rang through my head once more, this time, there was a slight difference to them.

I know a girl, she's like a curse
We want each other, no one will break first
So many nights, trying to find someone new
They don't mean nothing compared to you.