Chapter 12: Aren't We Supposed to Love Camping?

The month that followed was a warm haze of movie nights and afternoons spent sketching and writing in coffee shops, accompanied by a steady stream of snark and kisses. Suddenly the pair found themselves at the tail end of July on a bright and cloudless Saturday morning, drinking coffee in Jane's sunny studio apartment kitchen. Daria was considering the near-perfect match between her dear one's eyes and the vivid blue sky behind her when Jane's brow suddenly furrowed above her enormous yellow mug. "Oh god," she said flatly. "I can't believe it's already D-Day. What time does Willow and Coyote's twenty-fifth anniversary shindig kick off, again?"

"Four o'clock. Then dinner, probably involving lentils in some form, and then Mystik Spiral plays."

"Thank you, Trent, for bringing both our families together. I think he's ninety percent of the reason mine is attending—after all, my parents are out of the country so often they hardly talk to the Yeagers. Although it is nice that your mom recommended the band."

"Who knew she was such a fan of distorted seventies rock covers?" Daria smirked and then gazed into the black depths of her coffee. "I've been trying to predict how they'll react when I tell them you're my girl—um."

Jane looked amused and raised an eyebrow. "I've never been someone's girl-um before." Seeing Daria's apparent misery, she quickly changed tactics. "You know what? I think it's going to be okay. Our families have watched us flounder from one unsatisfying, failed hetero relationship to the next over the years. Don't even get me started on Wine-Snob Jeffrey," she teased.

Daria smiled. "If you lay off Jeff, I might let you forget about Enzo and his intolerable kettledrums sometime this century."

A short laugh from Jane. "Fair point. Anyway! After watching the Wheel of Dissatisfaction spin us through our straight dating lives for so long, maybe our parents are ready for us to sit under the rainbow and be happy. I mean, look how great my mom and dad were about Trent."

"It's not Amanda and Vincent I'm worried about."

A pause. "I know. Helen and Jake are something else entirely, and I say that with great affection. But no matter how they react, don't forget your girl-um"—a mischievous smile—"your girlfriend will be right there next to you."

This won a warm smile from Daria. She took Jane's hand in hers, and then she caught a glimpse of the black cat clock on the wall (complete with swinging tail pendulum). "Crap! It's already a quarter to twelve. Do you know how far it is to the campground?"

"Trent said it's about two hours from here. Did you bring clothes with you, or do you need to go home and get ready?"

"I've got everything in my backpack. Your tent has a rain cover, right? I heard it could storm later."

"Oh yes, Enzo insisted on the rain cover. God forbid his precious kettledrums should get wet."

"He brought them camping?"

"Don't ask. So, do you want to shower first or should I?"

"You go ahead. I'll continue to obsess over what I'm going to say to my mother."

Daria's strategy for breaking the sapphic news to Helen wasn't the only thing she contemplated while Jane was in the shower. She also pondered the perpetual state of excitement and terror she'd been living in since she had first asked herself a very big question: when was she going to have sex with Jane, and what exactly would that be like? She had done some light reading on the subject, and the mechanics were fairly straight-forward. It was the enormous emotional weight of the rite that demanded more consideration.

Her thought bog was soon interrupted by a radiant Jane, wrapped in her threadbare chartreuse robe and holding out a towel. Before long, Daria had showered, dressed, and helped Jane load the tent into the car. They would be taking Daria's secondhand hybrid since her girlfriend's rusty station wagon wasn't exactly reliable.

Three hours, two wrong turns, and several energy drinks later, they stood facing a crowd of mostly unfamiliar people under a white and yellow striped party tent. Daria took a deep breath, both to steady her nerves and to fill her lungs completely with the mountain air and its intoxicating notes of pine, dew, and woodsmoke. She looked heavenward at the circle of azure sky ringed by 100-foot trees, and then she shifted her gaze down to trace the trails winding to colorful tent sites nestled in the forest. Before she could ask Jane which charmingly rustic (if gnat-filled) site they should claim, the sunny and self-possessed voice of Quinn rang out from the direction of the party tent.

"Well hi there, Daria! I see you brought your amiga today."

Daria took in Quinn's impossibly haute-couture Nature Girl look as she approached: knee-high shearling boots, a flowing shabby-chic shift dress, and an artfully tarnished bronze cuff that could incapacitate a goose with an ill-timed gesture. The elder sibling rode an unexpected wave of warm, sisterly feeling and wrapped the absurdly fashionable redhead in a brief hug. "Hi, Quinn. I see you're dressed for bear fighting and mountain scaling."

Quinn stepped back, amused. "I would have worn a hoodie and baggy cargo pants with far too many pockets, but between the two of you, I think you have that covered."

Jane laughed. "How's the party so far?"

"Oh, you know. Willow and Coyote have been reminiscing with Mom and Dad about their commune years. Some bearded people we don't know are setting up the vegan buffet now." Suddenly, her eyes sparkled. "One of them is wearing a t-shirt with a quote by one of those dead French philosophers you like, Daria. Want me to introduce you to him?"

The uncomfortable brunette reddened. "Oh boy, I'm just so excited about the many varieties of quinoa we're about to enjoy that I can't endure another thrill. But thanks for the offer."

Jane quickly euthanized the awkward conversation with a question. "Have you seen Trent and Tom?"

"Yeah, they're setting up their tent over there." Quinn gestured toward two distant figures struggling with a yellow rain cover.

Jane looked at her secret girlfriend. "We should go help them."

"Good plan. Later, Quinn."

The pair fetched their own tent from Daria's car and claimed a spot next to Trent and Tom, who immediately gave them enormous hugs and accepted their help with the rain cover. When both tents had been assembled through a group effort, it was time to join the rustic and informal anniversary dinner starting under the striped canopy. Daria and Jane found themselves seated with Trent, Tom, Quinn, and the Yeagers' son Ethan. It immediately became clear that Quinn had picked up where she'd left off years before in her pursuit of the younger Yeager's attention. Although his brown hair had been cropped short, his quiet cynicism and apparent immunity to Quinn's overtures remained. An amused Daria nibbled her mango tofu tacos as she took in her sister's frequent hair tosses, arm touches, and giggles on the other side of the green gingham tablecloth. Suddenly, she felt a familiar touch on her shoulder.

"Daria!" Helen Morgendorffer, somehow appearing polished even in a fleece vest and jeans, looked down into her daughter's face and smiled. "I didn't see you girls come in." She turned to face Jane. "Did you get your tent all set up? I heard it might rain later."

"Yup, all ready to go."

"Good. I hope it doesn't get too chilly tonight—you two might be huddling for warmth!" The mortified pair exchanged a quick glance and then laughed along awkwardly with Helen. Daria could swear she saw Tom raise an eyebrow at Trent.

"Well, I'd better get back to our table. Your father is drinking Coyote's home-brewed beer and might tell another distressing childhood story any minute. See you all after dinner!"

When Helen had gone, the rest of the meal passed with a largely successful attempt at casual conversation on the part of Daria and Jane. Soon the tables were pushed aside and it was time to make room for Mystik Spiral. Its members looked slightly less grungy than five years before as they stood silhouetted against the sunset, tuning up their electric guitars and sending feedback into the rustling trees. Trent grabbed the mic. "Hey everyone, we're Mystik Spiral. We want to wish a happy twenty-fifth anniversary to Willow and Coyote."

Applause and whoops rang out on the evening air as Trent counted off the beat for the opening number. For the next two hours, Daria and Jane laughed and drank home-brewed beer as they danced to the sounds of Mystik Spiral—while being careful to maintain an inconspicuous distance from each other. When the amps had been switched off and the bonfire was lit, the enamored and slightly tipsy pair made their way into the woods to find sticks for marshmallows.

Suddenly stopping on the trail with flashlight in hand, Jane broached the topic they had been avoiding all night. "All right, Morgendorffer. It's getting late and you know your parents will be turning in soon—although I suspect mine are just getting started, since I saw them offer their special-occasion mushrooms to Willow and Coyote. Any ideas as to how we should do this?"

"I've been thinking about that. Maybe we can ask our parents to go on a stick-finding expedition, and when we've got them out here in the woods—boom, we kill ourselves."

"Ha! Seriously, Daria."

"Seriously? I like the walk idea, but with more talking and less suicide."

"I like it. Okay, should we head back and get this over with?"

A heavy sigh from Daria. "I suppose. Just let me get this leaf out of your hair first."

The leaf retrieval quickly turned into giggling and kissing, which preoccupied the pair so much they didn't hear footsteps approaching on the path. They did, however, hear Quinn's ear-piercing shriek when she nearly collided with them. Hurriedly jumping apart, they could hear the remaining party members scrambling through the brush as Jake yelled out, "Oh my god, Quinn! Is it a bear? No bear's going to eat my daughter!"

The girls' families and several party-goers they didn't know skidded to a halt in front of them, fixing their flashlights on three bewildered faces. Jake was the first to break the silence. "Quinn! Was there a bear?"

This was one of the rare occasions in Quinn's life when she couldn't find any words. Seeing that her sister wasn't going to be much help, Daria anxiously cleared her throat and replied, "There wasn't a bear, Dad. Quinn… Quinn saw me and Jane kissing."

Silence.

Then the clack of Vincent's professional camera as he captured the moment for all time, and then more silence.

Suddenly Amanda gave a single, excited clap and exclaimed, "That's marvelous news. You girls have finally heard the sapphic call that went unheeded for so long!"

Still more silence, and then Jake chimed in with an enthusiastic, "Yeah! I'm happy as long as my little girl is happy."

Daria shifted her gaze to Helen, who wore an entirely unreadable expression on her face. She sounded slightly uncomfortable as she joined in with, "Sure! Whatever makes you happy, honey. You know I've always loved Jane!"

Amanda chirped, "Who's up for celebratory Peruvian Pisco Sours back at the campsite?"

Temporarily dumbstruck, Jane eventually stammered out, "Okay, Mom. Pisco Sours it is." She hesitantly took Daria's hand and walked with her down the forest path under a surprisingly cloudless sky. Moonlight filtered through the ancient trees, lighting up their marveling faces as they approached the roaring bonfire.