AN: This chapter is officially the longest I've written for this story, it was actually originally almost twice as long, but I ultimately decided to split it into two chapters. I'm not even sure where the hell I pulled these next two chapters from, but I really like them and hope you all enjoy them.
Also, I made a video edit for what I think Lily and James's short dance would look like, but I have no idea how to put the link anywhere on this site, so if anyone could help me with that, I'd be very thankful.
The next couple of weeks passed by in a flash. In what felt like the blink of an eye for Lily, she was on a plane to Estonia with James and Minerva.
Two weeks hadn't been exactly long enough for them to work on all the things she wanted to. Their lifts were as good as they could get. Their pattern dance was good. Their step sequences were marginally better. And there had been some significant improvement on their twizzles.
The Tallinn Trophy wasn't a super popular competition and since it was in the middle of the Grand Prix series, no top skaters would be in attendance. In fact, Lily expected they would get a medal. She didn't want to curse it, but she felt like they had a pretty good shot. Not gold, the most plausible was bronze but she thought silver wasn't such a far-fetched idea.
Lily wished her mum were there. But she hadn't attended an out of town competition with Lily for a long time. Her skating was expensive as it was, and Mrs Evans couldn't afford to take the time off work.
Lily had missed international competitions. It had been a year almost to the day since she'd last attended an international competition. She loved the atmosphere of being around all the skaters from a plethora of other countries and getting to travel to nice places was an added bonus. She'd never been to Estonia, she'd been supposed to go. She and John had been assigned to compete at Junior Worlds in Tallinn the previous season but had ended up withdrawing since they, well, split up.
Lily had been disappointed when they'd drawn fourth for the short dance starting order. She felt like it was a bad omen. In this particular case, the draw had been completely random, but that probably wouldn't stop the judges from being more lenient on the last group of skaters.
The morning of the short dance, Lily had surprised herself by being quite calm. She'd called her mother earlier and she'd just kept telling herself it is what it is. Whatever happens, happens. And she'd managed to keep that sense of calm up until they'd taken their starting positions for the short dance. Then disaster had struck.
Well, to the untrained eye, it probably didn't look like a disaster at all. Lily had enjoyed about thirty seconds of everything going well, then they'd started the second set of the Ravensburger Waltz. And Lily couldn't quite say what happened, because she really wasn't sure.
They'd been in hold, facing each other, Lily's next key point had been coming up. And James had given her... a look. Honestly, she had no idea what was wrong with her. The only plausible explanation was that her brain had short-circuited.
She really had no idea what it had been she'd seen in James's eyes at that moment. They'd run through this pattern a million times before and she'd never had an issue. She couldn't tell if James was trying to amp up the performance, but there'd been something in his eyes... an intensity.
Lily still tried to avoid looking into his eyes for too long, but she'd gotten more used to meeting his gaze with the two months they'd been skating together. It had just been this moment specifically that luck hadn't been on their side. He'd been looking at her as he sometimes did; like Lily was some fascinating creature he'd never seen before. And Lily had just happened to meet his gaze at that particular moment – which she did sometimes – but had made the fatal mistake of not looking away in a second. She'd held his gaze. That's probably when her brain short-circuited. When she made the subconscious decision not to look away from him. Maybe she was trying to amp up the performance as well, but she should've known better.
She definitely should've known better. Because for a moment she'd felt feint. She'd looked away finally when she had to do a double twizzle which meant she was briefly out of James's arms. She genuinely thought she was going to pass out then. She didn't. But she did lag behind James on the dance, just a few seconds, but enough for them to lose their timing, and James not manage to take her back into hold. Lily had realised her mistake immediately, but for a second her legs failed to respond to her brain's commands. It had been James who had stretched out his arm and pulled her back into hold a little roughly. Lily noticed right away that he held her a little tighter than usual as if trying to hold her together. His hand covering the back of her dress almost entirely.
There'd only been a quick flash of worry in his eyes as they got back into the pattern. As competitive skaters, they'd both been taught their entire careers not to let mistakes get into their heads. Whatever happened, happened, and if you let it affect the rest of your program, you'd end up making things even worse for yourself. James was good at brushing off mistakes, Lily thought. And so was she, about half of the time. The rest of the program was good, no more mistakes, and though Lily was a little shaken, she tried her absolute hardest no to let it show.
She'd known though. Even though her mistake had been tiny, split-second, really, they had separated significantly during the pattern, which would for sure get them a one-point deduction. The split-second had also happened to be right when she'd been meant to be doing one of her key points, which that would surely get them a 'No' for that key point, and her making them lose their timing would mean that their remaining key point would be a 'Timing', which was just the same as a 'No'. So that'd be a level two Ravensburger Waltz. At best.
Lily felt like crying at the end of the program. She'd done her bows half-heartedly and rushed to get off the ice.
Despite the name, Lily had never actually cried in a Kiss & Cry. She might've when she was younger, but there was no video evidence of that, so it didn't count. But as she sat on the hard blue blob they called a couch she knew she had to hold it together. She held Minerva's hand tightly. She knew her mum was watching, and if Lily cried, she'd probably on a plane to Tallinn right that second. But she didn't cry. She smiled weakly and waved at the camera. She tried to stop herself from doing the maths in her head for what she thought their score would be and tried to listen to Minerva's comforting words.
Those two minutes sitting in the Kiss & Cry waiting for their scores had to be some of the most agonising of Lily's life. She'd made mistakes in programs before, but none had been as stupid and pointless as this one. She wanted to kick herself. She almost jumped when she heard the announcer lady's voice. "The scores please."
Lily took a deep breath as she looked up at the screen that would show their score. "Lily Evans, James Potter from Great Britain have earned in the short dance sixty-one point thirty-two points and they are currently in the first place."
32.84 technical and 29.48 components. And of course, the one-point deduction. That actually wasn't so bad. And of course, Lily wasn't misled by the words first place. They were currently in first out of four couples with eleven still to go. She'd expected to get something lower than they'd gotten at the Qualifier since domestic competitions tended to inflate scores a bit. And the technical was lower, but their components score was actually a tad bid higher. A pang went through Lily as she thought of the score they could've gotten if she hadn't made a mistake, or even if they hadn't gotten the deduction.
James hugged Lily briefly as they exited the Kiss & Cry. Lily was dying to see the protocols but knew they wouldn't come out until the event was over in some three hours.
"That was an... interesting score," Minerva said. "I think we should wait to see the protocols before we analyse anything too deeply. Do you want to go back to the hotel?"
Lily nodded quickly. She was thankful she didn't have to talk about it just yet. She'd been curious to watch some of the other competitors, but she'd lost that curiosity now.
Lily and James changed before taking a cab to their hotel along with their coach.
Lily was sharing a room with a girl named Mia, who was also from Team Great Britain and was competing in junior dance. Lily had met her a few times before, she was a nice kid. She wasn't there when Lily arrived though, probably still at the rink.
She flopped down on her bed and closed her eyes. She couldn't believe what had just happened. She'd fucked up majorly, because... what? She'd looked into James's eyes? She had no fucking idea how she was going to explain that to either James or Minerva.
There was a knock on the door and Minerva walked in. "I want to talk to you, Lily." She sat at the end of the bed. "It won't take long, come on."
Lily sat up. Not wanting to meet Minerva's eyes.
"I'm very disappointed with you."
Lily frowned deeply. A lump in her throat. "I'm so sorry. I don't even know what happened –"
Minerva cut her off. "I'm not disappointed with what you think I am. Every single skater makes silly mistakes occasionally. My brother once lost his balance in a step sequence at the Europeans because he got distracted by how the light reflected off the sparkles in my dress."
Lily cracked a smile. She was so teasing Malcolm when they got back.
Minerva looked at Lily softly. "This was your first pancake, not only of the season but of your partnership, no one expected it to be flawless. In fact, for the first pancake, I think it was very good."
Lily suddenly felt like crying again. She nodded.
"What I am disappointed about is your seemingly complete lack of interest in your partner the second the music turns off."
Lily's brows raised in surprise. "What?"
"The second you took your bows, you dropped his hand like it was on fire! You didn't even let him hold your hand for a second in the Kiss & Cry. In fact, you barely looked at him after you finished. How is that a united front?"
Lily could feel her ears burning in embarrassment. How was she going to explain to Minerva that she was scared if she looked into his eyes again, she might've actually passed out right then and there. She was right though. Lily had been freaking out too much to notice, but she had treated James a little coldly after they were done. "Well... I didn't know he even wanted to hold my hand."
"You acted so cold towards him. Like you would combust if he even got near you." Minerva sighed. "Lily, I'm not only telling you this for the sake of your partnership but because if the judges think you two dislike each other, it might damage your reputation."
Lily hadn't even thought about that. She nodded. "Okay, I'll try to be more... friendly."
Minerva smiled. "Alright then. Now, I want you and James to go out and explore the city. The free dance practice isn't until tomorrow morning, you should go have some fun. That is an order. I'm going to go call Melanie and Sirius since their first practice in Moscow is probably over by now. If you two are still inside this hotel when I get off the phone, I will throw you out myself."
Lily gaped at her coach. Why was she always so adamant she and James spend time together off the ice?
Minerva left without another word. Lily laid back down on the bed. She really didn't feel like going out to explore the city with James. But if she stayed in the hotel room she'd probably start freaking out over the free dance ahead of time. And she did genuinely want to be a tourist around Tallinn.
Thinking back to Minerva's words, Lily did think she ought to be a little more relaxed around James. It was as if every time she was around him, there was something holding her back. Maybe it was the fear that if she was easier around him, she'd start actually liking him. And she'd spent way too much time determined on not liking him. But she supposed that was just her stubbornness talking.
Lily also figured she'd been waiting for James to do something to make her truly angry. But he'd changed a lot in the past months and so far, he hadn't really done anything as infuriating as he'd done in the past. And she was starting to figure he had actually changed for good. Which left her with no excuse not to be friendly with him.
Lily took some time to text her friends. She knew if she texted Mary she'd ask about the short dance since she'd probably watched it. So she settled for texting Melanie and Yuna, both of whom were at competitions themselves and probably hadn't watched. She didn't tell them about the short dance though, just asked how their competitions were going. Yuna was at the Junior Japanese Nationals with Remus and Melanie at the Rostelecom Cup with Sirius in Moscow.
There was a knock on the door. Lily got up to answer. It was James.
"So, I heard we're supposed to go be touristy in the city."
Lily sighed. She looked down at her outfit and deemed her jeans and blouse acceptable. "Let me just go grab my handbag."
James grinned. "I didn't actually think you'd be in the mood."
Lily walked back into the room. "Well, I am."
She took her handbag, shoved a lipstick inside and walked out of the room, closing the door behind her.
"So, where to first?" James asked.
In reality, neither Lily nor James had had time to research things to do in Tallinn, so they ended up going to the lobby of the hotel to get some information and were advised to head to Old Town, where most things worth seeing were.
Walking into Old Town felt very much like time travelling to medieval times. Of course, once you looked closely, you'd see all the small modern things that were unavoidable, like trash cans and signs. But it was still quite beautiful.
"Lily, you've been looking at that pamphlet for a long time, it's starting to make me think you were serious about going to a museum," James said.
Lily frowned and put the pamphlet down. "Why wouldn't I want to go to a museum?"
He shrugged. "Because... they're kinda boring."
Lily gaped at James. "Excuse me? Museums are awesome."
James narrowed his eyes slightly. "I actually can't tell if you're being serious right now."
Lily let out a small huff of indignation. "You bet I am! Museums are the best places on Earth."
"I must turn to my previous argument; they are boring."
Lily crossed her arms over her chest. She was starting to regret agreeing to come here with James. "Museums are educational, entertaining, and amazing. I don't know how anyone couldn't love them."
James looked at her like she'd grown another head. Lily turned back to her pamphlet. She gasped. "Oh my god. Look at this."
James took the pamphlet. "Estonian Open Air Museum."
"It literally sounds amazing. I want to go so bad."
James read from the paper. "'Experience the everyday lives of casual villagers of 18th century Estonia in this wonderful museum surrounded by woods. There are already over 70 buildings in this recreational village, so visitors can get to know how locals lived, what they ate and where they got their education.' Actually, it does sound kind of good."
Lily frowned. "It's kind of far, though."
"We'll get a cab."
"We already took a cab to get here. That's going to be way expensive."
"An Uber, then."
"I'm pretty sure that's more expensive."
"An UberPool then."
Lily thought for a moment. "If we go, though, it'll be the only museum we visit since it's far and there are no others around it."
"Well, this is the only museum that sounds like I'm not going to be bored to death, so I say we go."
So, they hailed the UberPool.
They ended up in the car with a couple of American middle-aged tourists who were also visiting the Open Air Museum. Lily had never attempted to make conversation with strangers in public transportation, but James seemed to be quite enthralled in conversation with the American lady, talking about Tallinn and what they were planning on seeing.
"So how long are you and your girlfriend here for?" The plump, blonde woman asked James.
Lily tensed slightly and hoped James would correct the woman.
"Oh, we're actually leaving the day after tomorrow."
The woman seemed shocked. "Oh, so soon. Are you doing the whole Baltic tour?"
"No, we're not here as tourists, actually. We're athletes, we're here for a competition, we just had the afternoon off today."
The woman's eyebrows raised almost to her hairline. She was extremely impressed to hear that they were competitive figure skaters. Lily let James take most of the lady's many, many questions. But she seemed so curious and impressed by everything they said, that Lily couldn't help but answer a few questions herself.
Lily had no idea how by the time that they got to the museum, the Americans now knew that Lily and James had been partners for two months, that this was their very first competition together, what their music choices were, where they trained, and what major international medals they had. And in return, they knew that Mrs and Mr Simms were from Nashua, New Hampshire, had been married for forty-five years, Mrs Simms mother was British and she had been a fan of American skater, Peggy Fleming when she was a teenager. This exchange of information had only been possible because of Mrs Simms' ability to speak unbelievably fast.
When they went to purchase their tickets, James helped the Simms figure out their Euros, and Lily knew then that they had become the unofficial guides for the Americans.
Lily might not have been inside an actual classroom in years, but that didn't mean that she couldn't be a nerd. Her father had instilled in her the thirst for knowledge at a young age. She absolutely adored talking about history with her father for hours. And he was never hesitant to talk about it for hours, even if Lily had just asked a yes or no question about a historical event. The fact that her father was a university professor and had always stressed the importance on education was the main reason why Lily wanted to attend university, even if she ended up having a job in the skating world.
So, this place was unbelievably cool for her. She'd never seen a place like it. It was like travelling back in time. The only thing that looked out of place were the tourists with their modern clothes and phones out.
The wide field was splattered with farms and old houses and people walking around in full peasant costume. It was like something out of a movie. Her father would be so jealous.
As they started going into the little houses, which were also made to look medieval on the inside, Lily became the Simms' official photographer. They wanted so many pictures that they'd actually left their camera with Lily indefinitely.
At some point, as they walked into one of the farms, Lily realised the Simms weren't with them anymore. She thought maybe they ought to look for them, but figured they'd find them again at some point.
As they entered the farm, Lily and James caught the end of an explanation on how to chop firewood. The Eighteenth Century farmer asked for volunteers for a demonstration, but of the families listening, none of the adults seemed too keen on it, the children did, but their parents probably weren't going to let them get near an axe.
The silence was starting to get awkward when James spoke up. "I'll do it."
Lily's eyes widened.
James walked up to the stump where a log stood. The farmer man handed him the axe.
Lily made her way to the front of the crowd. She actually had no idea if James would be able to do this. She discreetly took a picture as James raised the axe over his shoulder. She thought Mrs Simms might appreciate it.
James easily split the piece of wood clean through the middle. There was a collective impressed gasp, followed by a cheer amongst the children watching. Even the farmer clapped. "Yes! That was perfect!" He turned to the crowd. "Anyone else?"
How hard could it be, really? If James could do it. "I'll go."
James eyed her warily as he handed her the axe. Lily only raised a brow defiantly in response. "Please, be careful."
Lily scoffed. The axe was heavier than she thought. She worried slightly. It wasn't like she was weak, she was an athlete, but she didn't need the strength to swing around an entire person for a program, so she didn't have the strength James did. God, if she failed at this she'd definitely start working out until she could do a reverse lift – which, yes, meant she would be the one lifting him.
Lily tried to mimic James's movements by lifting the axe over her shoulder as high as she dared.
Lily brought down the axe, but it got stuck into the log. She felt a blush over her neck.
James approached her. He unstuck the axe. "You need to lift it higher up and bend your knees." He handed it to her.
Lily sighed. She lifted the axe again. James arranged her arms before stepping back. "All your strength Lily."
This time, the blade went through almost cleanly. The kids cheered. Lily let out a bit of smile. James raised his hand for a high-five, and Lily conceded it.
They both thanked the farmer man and walked away as the group started to disperse.
"How'd you know how to do that?" Lily asked.
James shrugged. "My grandparents have a farm in Chile, I spend a lot of time there during the winter."
Lily frowned. "In the winter?" No one at the palace really vacationed during the winter, since it was the height of the skating season.
"Oh, I mean the winter there. Which is the summer in England."
Lily blushed. She knew she had not just forgotten about the existence of the Southern Hemisphere in front of James. "Right, of course."
Thankfully, just then James's phone rang. He answered. "We're at the Kostrasieme farm. You have to go back and just through the pathway on the right of the farmhouse."
Lily frowned. Had he given his number to the Simms? When did that happen?
"Yeah, see you soon." He hung up.
So that was why the Simms had separated so easily.
On cue, the couple appeared. They were carrying some sort of deformed-looking bread in a basket. Mrs Simms smiled widely. "Oh, hello! Would you like to try some of the stuffed turnips we made?"
Lily eyed the golden-brown things and nodded along with James good-naturedly.
Lily didn't know what she expected a stuffed turnip to taste like, but it was definitely disgusting. She shared a distressed look with James, unsure of what to do with the piece of turnip in her mouth. James got a steely look in his eyes and swallowed. He made an effort to make a pleasing sound. "So good."
Mrs Simms' smile widened.
Lily nodded enthusiastically, trying to keep her face composed. She finally swallowed her bite.
Mr Simms said something to his wife in a low voice. She perked up. "Oh, yes. We were wondering if you knew around how much the tickets for your competition are and if there might be any left for tomorrow."
Lily's heart warmed. Did they want to go see them? "Um, I'm not sure, they can't be more than seven or eight Euros, though. And there were only about ten spectators today, so I seriously doubt they're sold out for tomorrow."
Mrs Simms seemed appalled. "Oh, now we definitely have to go! What time are you on?"
"Oh, we couldn't pull you away from your plans, weren't you going to the harbour tomorrow?"
Mrs Simms shook her head. "No, we have to go. You need support!"
Lily smiled. "The free dance starts at eleven in the morning, but we're skating in the last group so we'll go on at around 1:30. Don't worry if you can't make it, though."
Mr Simms pulled out his cell phone. "Could you give us the address?"
"I'll send it to you. So you can give it directly to the Uber," James said.
Ms Simms smiled. "Oooh, I'm so excited! I've never been to a figure skating competition!"
After checking out a few more farms, all four of them went to the medieval dinner together.
Once they sat, James took off his jumper. Lily was physically unable to unglue her eyes from James's torso as his shirt rode up a little. She frowned as she noticed something blue sticking to his back. "You didn't take off your KT tape."
James frowned momentarily. "Oh, shit. I forgot. Will you help me?"
Lily had never fought harder to keep a blush from her face. She saw Mrs Simms eying them, pleased, out of the corner of her eye. Lily, if you don't answer in the next second, you're officially going to make this weird. "Sure."
James had two bands of the athletic tape parallel to each other on his back, the bright blue colour contrasted against his slightly tanned skin. He only lifted his shirt slightly at his back.
Lily tried not to touch his skin too much as she pulled off the tape, but it was pretty impossible. Shit, how was his back skin so soft?
Lily finished the job quickly. As James went to throw away the strips, Mrs Simms smiled mischievously at Lily. "I know you two aren't a couple. But I'm just saying, you would definitely fit well together. And imagine what your babies would look like! With your beautiful eyes and hair and his chiselled features, oh, that would be so beautiful!"
Well, that escalated quickly.
Lily was saved from having to respond by James's return. She had no idea what had given Mrs Simms that impression, but she supposed if that's what the woman saw, maybe she could convey that on the ice too.
The farm food was kind of disgusting. Lily felt bad to only nibble at it, but she couldn't do it. The other three didn't seem entirely pleased by it, but they ate it.
Mrs Simms still had questions for Lily and James. Some skating related, some personal. She asked where they could purchase a British flag in Tallinn – they had no idea, and if spectators were allowed to throw flowers on the ice like at the Olympics – they had no idea either as they hadn't seen anyone try that day. Then the conversation turned towards Lily and James's love life, and Lily just knew by the look on Mrs Simms eyes that she was trying to get one of them to break and admit they liked the other. She tried not to squirm in her seat.
"Well, James, I think one day you'll find the perfect girl for you, you're a fine young man." Mrs Simms was talking to James, but she looked directly at Lily when she said it. "What about you, hon, any boys knocking at your door?"
Lily smiled worriedly, looking down at her hands. She sincerely hoped her next words would go down well with the Simms, because she quite liked them, and it'd be a pity to cut ties with them. "Well, I had a girlfriend for a while, but we broke up late last year."
The Simms' shock was quite visible. Mrs Simms gaped at her. "Oh, why didn't you say anything? Our son is gay too!"
Lily smiled. "I'm actually not a lesbian, I'm bisexual."
Lily felt James sit up straighter on his seat and proceed to choke on his own spit. She frowned at him. What was wrong with him? He coughed a few times, cleared his throat, and pretended at casualness.
Mrs Simms grin showed all her teeth. Lily started wishing she'd just let the woman believe she was a lesbian. "Oh, so no boys or girls on the horizon?"
Lily's mind briefly flashed to Diner Luke and his kind eyes. "Not really. I mean, we're pretty busy with competition at the moment. It's an important season for us."
"Oh, of course, of course. Wouldn't it be ideal if you dated each other? Since you already spend so much time together?" Mrs Simms laughed, but Lily could tell she was absolutely serious.
Lily laughed nervously. She looked at James, who seemed to be thinking really hard about something, a slight frown across his face. "You know, actually I used to have a really big crush on Lily when we were younger."
Mrs Simms expression was as if she had just been told world peace had been achieved. "Oh! So you've known each other since you were young?"
James nodded slightly. "We started training in the same group when we were eleven. I think she was the first girl I ever fancied. It was the eyes, you know? The first time she looked at me, I felt like her eyes had pierced right through me. I gathered the guts to ask her out when we were thirteen, but she rejected me since I was a bit of a troublemaker and a pain in her, um, butt. I asked her again several times over the years but she never said yes."
Lily sat rigidly in her chair. Why was he telling these two middle-aged Americans they had just met in the middle of Estonia all this?
Mrs Simms looked like she was about to start shedding tears. She turned to Lily. "Oh, and would you ever say yes if he asked again?"
Lily averted her eyes. She needed the Earth to swallow her right then and there. "Um... I... don't know, well, I don't think we're the same people we used to be. We were probably around fifteen when he last asked and then we both got girlfriends for a while, and then he never asked again... after that." Lily was starting to put the dots together. Oh shit.
Mrs Simms turned to James. "So, do you still like Lily?"
James cleared his throat and wiped his palms on his pants. "Oh, um – I, well – you see, I guess I –"
Lily had never seen James so flustered. Shit. Did he still like her?
He cleared his throat again. Now all Lily, Mr and Mrs Simms were waiting for an answer. "You know, I think she's a... great person. And I have a lot of... admiration and respect for her. And any guy or girl would be lucky to date her." He paused but continued as he realised no one was coming to rescue him. "Well, as Lily said, this is a very important season for us, so I don't think either of us is especially looking for a relationship at the moment."
Mrs Simms seemed unimpressed by his non-answer, but let it go. "Oh, well, I think one day you'll both realise what it is you truly want."
It was Mr Simms, who didn't speak up often, who took mercy on the two red-as-tomatoes teenagers and changed the subject.
Their love lives didn't come up again, thankfully. When dinner was done, the Simms announced their plans to leave as it was getting chilly and they wanted to get back to Old Town, where they were staying, early. Lily and James offered to go with them, but they insisted they enjoy the museum a little longer.
As they to another one of the farms, Lily tried not to ponder too much on what Mrs Simms had said. She just seemed to be so sure that they liked each other. Lily had no idea if she was really behaving so differently around James for the woman to think that? The only thing that had changed was Lily's earlier resolution to start being nicer to James. But surely that didn't make it seem like… No, of course, not.
After all, how could a middle-aged woman she'd met in an UberPool only hours ago know anything about her relationship with James?
