A/N: Sorry for the longer wait between updates. There's some borderline M-rating content this chapter which I'm not sure warrants a move to an M-rating over T, but I've decided to leave it as T for now, though that might change in the future. The aftermath of the Challenger Tragedy from Severus and Lily's POV, along with their struggles dealing with it. Also, Severus and Lily have another heart-to-heart chat about their perceptions and fears regarding their burgeoning relationship. I hope you all enjoy the chapter!
Chapter 17 Rescue From Despair
The days following Challenger's tragic destruction saw a gloomy atmosphere settle over the household, rather, the entire nation. Lily's birthday saw a brief respite to their sorrow, as Severus took Lily, Harry and Azalea out for dinner in town and spent an evening strolling around a park in Flagstaff all bundled up tightly in scarfs, hats and coats. Lily and Severus' passionate lovemaking later that night saw a return to intimacy, and a brief banishment of their misery; but the following morning the sullen attitude of Harry and Azalea brought them down to earth once more. Harry took the loss especially hard, his young mind somehow rationalizing that it was his fault. If only he hadn't watched. Maybe they'd have been okay and made it to space. Lily did her best to comfort her son, Severus too, with Harry and occasionally Azalea joining their bed numerous times in the weeks following the accident. While Harry would get over the loss in time, it was a long and arduous journey for him and it showed in his lack of smiles, and the sparkle vanishing from his eyes for a time. Try as she might, Lily didn't know what to do, and with her son's frequent visits to her and Severus' bed in the middle of the night, their love-life suffered too.
"It's always the same dream, mummy," Harry said tearfully one night, as Lily lovingly dabbed at his glistening, emerald eyes. "I—I see them, and I'm flying too on my broom—next to them, and I'm yelling at them to get out, but then they explode and…and—" his voice broke off into a sob and Lily hugged Harry tightly to her chest.
"—They're in a better place now, sweetie, just let it all out," Lily whispered, her own voice thick and heavy.
Harry sniffled even louder and buried his head into Lily's bosom and her arms circled around his shaking back.
It was all Lily could do to stifle Harry's crying, stroking up and down his back in an effort to soothe his misery.
She shot Severus a fleeting look, one that conveyed her desperation and screamed 'help' to him, but he was hesitant to come nearer. Gathering his courage, Severus swallowed the lump in his throat and shuffled closer across the bedspread to Harry and Lily, putting an arm around the boy which only made him cry harder. Between Lily's comforting embrace and Severus' loose one, Harry eventually drifted off to a fitful slumber between them; though both adults remained silently awake for quite some time.
The following morning, Severus rose bright and early, bleary-eyed and achingly tired. He went about his morning duties like a drone, just going through the motions and doing what needed to be done as blandly as possible before returning to the farmhouse. Frank had even noticed what was wrong, his concerned gaze and inquisitive squawks, however, remained unanswered by Severus. When he returned to the house, he spotted Azalea in the kitchen, awake bright and early and seemingly at work on some of her artwork. Severus came closer and sat down beside her in his usual spot.
"G'mornin' Uncle Sev'rus," Azalea mumbled, not turning her gaze away from the sheet of paper as she scribbled.
"Good morning to you too, Azalea," Severus replied. "How did you sleep?"
Azalea shrugged, but then lifted her hazel gaze from the page and said; "Good. B-but I heard Harry leave his room."
Severus gave the three-year-old a sad smile. "He did, yes, but I hope it didn't keep you awake for long."
Azalea had always been a light sleeper, so he was relieved to see her shake her head and then return her gaze to her drawing.
"Speaking of Harry; have you seen him or your mom at all, this morning?" he asked inquisitively.
He summoned a pot of coffee that Poesy had brewed earlier and set it down on the table. Azalea shook her head in response to his question.
"Would you like some juice?"
Azalea looked up again and nodded. "Yes—um, orange, please," she murmured.
Severus got up to pour her a cup and then sat back down, handing her the glass.
With a wave of his wand, he summoned the newspaper from the foyer and caught it deftly, setting it down in his lap as he lifted a warm mug of coffee to his lips for a sip. Severus sat there in silence for a while as he perused his paper and drank his warm brew; though occasionally his gaze would wander over to Azalea to observe her work. She really was quite talented for her age. Not just at artwork, either, for her brewing talents for a three-year-old were already quite impressive. Lily had been supervising her daughter's brewing and Azalea had been making quite a bit of progress with regard to advancing her skills and experience. She hadn't yet brewed anything remotely like what a Hogwarts student would, but she was learning about how different ingredients interacted with one another and how to prepare various, 'safe' ingredients. Much like Harry with his knowledge of Thunderbirds, Azalea soaked up whatever knowledge her mother offered like a wet-sponge. And though Lily's attention through the early weeks of February remained fixedly on helping Harry with his grief, whenever she did make time for her daughter, her eyes lit up with delight every time she saw her reach a new milestone in her burgeoning potions journey.
Azalea lifted her glass of orange juice to her mouth and took a slurp, the loud sound causing Severus to chuckle and Azalea to look up at him. When she did, Severus' laughter died a quick death as her hazel eyes filled with concern, and a little bit of fear.
"Uncle Sev…is my brother okay?"
Once again, Azalea's outstanding perceptiveness made its presence known.
Severus sighed softly, but didn't pull his gaze from Azalea's face. "The…accident, has been tough on him, Azalea. Harry had been looking forward to the launch for a very long time, and to see it end so…abruptly, was very painful for him. Your mother and I are doing our best to take care of him."
Azalea's brow furrowed, leading Severus to believe she wasn't fully satisfied with his answer. "I can try and help too, maybe," she said. "Harry helped me a lot when mummy and daddy fought, I want to help him too!"
The sudden onset of wetness in his eyes took Severus by surprise, but he blinked it away and reached out across the table for Azalea's hand. She met him halfway as her tiny, little fingers curled around his calloused ones. "You already are helping him," he promised earnestly. "Just keeping being a good sister, and treating him as you normally do, and that's all the help Harry'll need."
Azalea nodded her had solemnly, but before she could say anything more, the sound of two sets of footsteps on the stairs drew their attention away to the downstairs hall. Harry and Lily appeared moments later in the doorway, and without so much as a word, Azalea leaped to her feet and rushed across the kitchen to hug her shocked older brother.
"Azalea—wha? What are you—"
"—I love you, Harry," Azalea whispered fervently.
Harry hugged his sister back and said; "I love you too, Azalea."
Severus and Lily's eyes met, neither able to keep down the shocked expressions they now wore. They looked over to Harry and Azalea and smiled, Lily's look seemingly saying that she'd be in need of an explanation later on when they had some quiet time.
Later in the morning, Harry and Azalea were both in the living room sat in front of the TV. While Harry watched his morning cartoons, Azalea was busy trying to show off her latest drawings to her brother whose attention rapidly fluctuated between his sister's expressionist art and the latest episode of The Transformers. Lily and Severus were sat a short distance away on the sofa, the former keeping an eye on her kids whilst the latter skimmed through some of the rangers' reports.
"I was thinking of taking Harry flying later, would that be all right with you?" Severus asked calmly, breaking their contented silence.
"You don't have to ask that, Severus. Harry would be more than happy to," Lily answered with a soft smile.
"I'm not talking about the flying you're thinking of," Severus said warily. He darted Lily a quick look, seeing the surprise registering on her face.
"You—you mean…like what you did with me that night?"
Severus nodded. "Hence, why I asked."
A smile curled Lily's lip and she scooted closer to kiss the corner of Severus' mouth. "I trust you, you know that? You know more about your birds than I could ever hope to—even if given a lifetime. If you think Harry's ready…then I trust your judgement on it," she commented trustingly.
She moved to kiss him on the corner of his mouth again but Severus turned slightly and their lips came together squarely. Lily's lip quivered with laughter allowing Severus to press his tongue forth to meet her's in a light brush. She sighed and let her hand fall lower to brush his hip, then his arse, giving a firm tug to pull him closer; while Severus busied himself with caressing the pale skin of her abdomen beneath her shirt. Before they could get too carried away, Lily pulled back from him with a grin.
"If you play your cards right, there'll be plenty more of that later, Sev," she remarked teasingly, eliciting a groan and a laugh from Severus.
They stole another quick kiss and went back to their prior business, Lily watching her kids, and Severus reading his reports.
At around four o'clock, Severus pulled Harry aside and asked him to get dressed to go outside and to meet him in the foyer in fifteen minutes. When asked why, Severus answered that he had a surprise for Harry and that he'd love it. Harry smiled, though Severus sadly noted that it still didn't reach his eyes, and then fled towards his room to get dressed. Severus spent the next fifteen minutes sorting through some of his paperwork awaiting Harry's return. When he finally made his appearance, Severus greeted him with a smile and the two ventured outside into the chilly air of the late afternoon.
"Can I go get my broom?" Harry asked quickly, shuddering as a gust of cold wind struck them. He instinctively wrapped his coat around himself a little more tightly.
"We won't be needing it," said Severus. He turned around to face the boy. "I did say that we were going flying, didn't I?"
A small grin broke out over Harry's face as he nodded. His green eyes widened as he watched Severus lift a familiar-looking whistle to his lips and blew.
"Are you—wait, are you really?" Harry asked in a whisper.
Severus grinned wryly at Harry and nodded. "Yes."
Moments later, Frank appeared and landed right next to Severus and Harry, greeting the duo with a loud, friendly chirp.
"Frank!" Harry said ecstatically. Frank crooned enthusiastically in reply and knelt down so Harry could stroke his plumage.
Harry turned to Severus, his eyes wide and eager. "Are…are we going to fly?"
Severus smiled broadly and nodded. "Indeed we are. Now, up you get."
Harry squealed with delight as Severus reached lower and lifted Harry up from under his shoulders. Hoisted into the air, Harry was plopped down on Frank's back and immediately grabbed for Frank's dorsal feathers to anchor himself. Severus climbed up behind Harry and with one hand, held him securely, and with the other, grasped Frank to secure himself.
"Whoah," Harry whispered. He turned to look over his shoulder at Severus. "This is so cool!"
The sparkle had returned once more to his eyes as he spoke, causing Severus to smile too. "It'll get much cooler than this, Harry. Just wait until we're up in the air."
With that, Severus reached down to Frank's left flank and tapped him there. "We're ready when you are, Frank," he said calmly.
Frank crooned loudly and then stretched out all six of his wings, Harry breathed 'wow' in astonishment. Sporting a wingspan of over 40 feet, Frank truly made an impressive figure as he prepared to take to the skies. The beating of Frank's wings caused plumes of snow to blast out and away from the Thunderbird as he once more achieved flight. Harry held onto Frank's dorsal feathers for dear life as the Thunderbird slowly climbed into the air, the powerful beating of his wings sending reverberations up and down his body.
"Whoah!"
"Steady now, Harry, hold on tightly. In fact…" Severus took out his wand and cast a sticking charm that stuck Harry to Frank.
Harry hardly noticed it as Frank had now settled into a hover about a hundred feet about the trees. With a tap on his flank, Frank was given the go-ahead to surge forth, and without further delay he flew forward towards Randall's Ravine. Following the accident, Severus' sealing of the ravine meant that it was now safe for Thunderbirds to approach, and Frank decided to do just that. Frank descended to just above the tree-line and flew along the mile-and-a-half length of the ravine with Severus and Harry on his back.
As Frank flew along and just above the ravine, Severus asked; "So, how are you enjoying it?"
Harry's smile was as exuberant as ever. "It's incredible Uncle Sev, wow!"
"I'm glad you're enjoying yourself," Severus chuckled.
Frank opted to take Harry on a scenic, airborne tour of the reserve; and as they flew, they spotted numerous other birds up there in the air with them. The other birds sensed their leader's presence and most crooned their own greetings upon seeing Frank and the two humans he carried on his back. All in all, nearly half of the birds in the reserve wound up flying alongside Severus, Harry and Frank at one point or another; and Harry was having a ball of a time. The sparkle in his eyes had made a most glorious return, and Severus couldn't have been happier to see it. They completely lost track of time as they flew, only realizing that it was time to return to terra firma when they spotted a small, silvery-white bird flying towards them. It didn't take long for Severus to recognize it as a Patronus—Lily's patronus; its ethereal glow and sparkle gave it away to his well-trained eye. As the Patronus flew alongside Frank, Severus and Harry, they heard Lily's clear voice asking them to come back down as dinner was almost ready.
The raven vanished into thin air, and with that, Severus tapped Frank's flank three times in succession. The thunderbird cast Severus a quick glance, and if it were physically possible, he would've smiled; but he got the signal and descended back to the farmhouse. Frank touched down with surprising deftness, and leaned over to one side to allow Severus and Harry to disembark. Severus did so first, and then, extended his hand to help Harry down. Harry grasped Severus' proffered hand readily and slid down Frank's side until his boots reached the gravel. He looked up at Severus with a broad grin and his eyes' sparkling with delight. His smile broadened as Frank knelt lower and allowed Harry to stroke the side of his head.
"I'll see you tomorrow, Frank!"
Frank squawked at the young boy and his coat rippled with small bolts of lightning.
"All right Harry, we'd better head inside," said Severus.
Harry cast him a small look, the beginnings of a frown creasing his brows and lips. "Can we stay a little longer?" he asked quietly.
Severus briefly glanced over to the front door, sighed, then turned back to Harry. "For a few more minutes, I suppose."
Harry's reaction was instantaneous. He grinned and then turned back to Frank to pet him.
Little did they know, Lily and Azalea watched the entire exchange from just behind the kitchen window. It was all Lily could do to restrain her daughter and prevent her from running out of the house to them, but she just about managed to keep Azalea in place. Severus wasn't the only one who'd seen the sparkle return to Harry's eyes, for Lily and Azalea had seen it too. What drew a smile from his sister, drew tears from his mother, as Lily gazed upon the pair of them fondly. Though her eyes shimmered, her tears refused to fall, though the mere thought of Severus coming to love not just her, but her children with James Potter of all people threatened to have them spill over. She could just picture sixteen-year-old Severus' reaction if she'd have told him this was what their lives would be ten years into the future. A gust of wind might've knocked him flat. When they returned to the house a few minutes later, Lily quickly beckoned Harry and Azalea into the dining room where their roast beef awaited them. Then, she turned her attention to Severus, and spent the next few minutes of their isolation accosting him with her talented tongue.
Severus was as receptive as ever to her advances, willingly yielding control to Lily as they shared a passionate kiss away from youthful eyes.
"I saw what you did out there," Lily breathed, stealing another kiss. "I saw how Harry reacted—" another kiss, "—how he laughed and he smiled—" this time Severus kissed her, "—and I loved it. And I love you for helping him."
Lily didn't try to kiss him again, her lips curled into a small smile as she bowed her head and pressed into his chest. Severus dipped his head lower, and with his fingers on her chin, tilted her head up so he could gaze into her verdant eyes. His dark eyes twinkled dazzlingly and Lily found herself ensnared. Pursuit of further passion was dashed when they heard the distant voice of Harry calling for them from the dining room. Lily smiled sadly but couldn't resist pressing her lips delicately against Severus' one more time before the two left the foyer hand in hand.
Dinner was a far more upbeat affair than it had been in recent weeks. Harry jovially regaled Lily and Azalea with the events of his afternoon. Getting to fly on Frank's back far higher than he'd ever flown on his kid-broom was an experience he wasn't to forget in a hurry.
"It was amazing, I felt…it felt so incredible," Harry described with awe.
"That's wonderful, sweetie," Lily said lovingly. "How high did you fly?" As she enunciated her question, her eyes darted to Severus for all of half a second, before settling back on Harry gently.
"Oh, we went really high, mummy," Harry grinned.
Lily pretended to be surprised, but truthfully, she'd consulted Severus before their flight and he assured her that Frank would take them no more than one-hundred feet up.
"So, you really enjoyed yourself then," Lily surmised.
Harry nodded eagerly. "Yeah!' he responded enthusiastically. He then turned to face Azalea. "You've got to try it next time 'Z'lea—"
"—Now, hold on just a minute, Harry," Severus interrupted swiftly. "Azalea's too little to ride a thunderbird, and besides…I doubt you're that keen on trying it even if you were big enough, right Azalea?"
Azalea nodded swiftly.
Harry turned to his younger sister with a shocked expression on her face. "You mean you don't want to, Z'lea? Even if you had the chance?"
Azalea resolutely shook her head, leaving no room for doubt in Harry's mind. Harry's surprise briefly morphed to disappointment, but a cheery look on his face soon replaced that as he asked Severus if he could go flying again with him sometime. Severus laughed and said that he could next week after Valentine's Day. He and Lily shared a brief look at that, the fire in his eyes causing a slight blush on her cheeks and a small grin to curl her lip.
Hours later after dinner, a movie, and putting the kids to sleep, Lily and Severus were huddled together on the sofa downstairs nursing a couple glasses of brandy. After a recent warm-spell, the temperature had dropped once more to be only a few degrees above freezing. Lily was bundled up in a thick, terrycloth robe infused with a mild warming charm; whilst Severus opted for his usual, cotton pyjamas, also using a mild warming charm. Even so, Lily insisted on curling up against his chest and had all but moulded into his side in search of greater warmth. She raised the glass of brandy to her lips and took a long swig, then set it down on the coffee table before them with a clink, the glass empty. Severus mirrored her actions and set his empty glass down beside hers much more softly. When he indicated if she wanted another drink, she shook her head and sighed. It wasn't a forceful or resigned sigh, Severus was relieved to hear, but one of contentment and peace. He briefly entertained the notion of asking her what brought it on but quickly decided against it. There were only one or two people in the world he was totally at peace with in silence, and well, Lily was one of them.
"What did I ever do to deserve you?" Lily asked quietly, sounding as if she were asking nothing and everything at the same time.
Severus froze. He immediately tensed and Lily could feel it through his pyjama top, the rigidity of his chest and the tensing of his arms. "I—what? Lily, what do you mean?"
Lily sighed again, exasperatedly, before shifting in his arms and turning so that she faced him. She pulled away just far enough so she could gaze directly into his eyes, her small hands rising to cup his stubbled cheeks. "You treat my children as if they're your own—" she kissed him, "—do things for them and love them as if you are their father—" another kiss, "—and you still find the time to love me, treasure me, and make me feel as if I'm the luckiest gal on the planet." She planted a searing kiss, her lips burning against his as she poured her red-hot love into him. "I still don't know how I lucked out with you, Sev. At this rate I'll never know…but what I do know is that I'll never take what we have for granted, I know—I've seen what I could have elsewhere…and it pales in comparison to your love for me. And I love you so much."
Silence greeted her in lieu of her heartfelt proclamation. Severus' eyes were wide with shock, his lips parted in a silent O as his mind reeled from the force of her statement. All of a sudden, every insecurity he'd ever had in relation to Lily, and her actually being with him was dredged up from the bowels of his subconsciousness. His fear that one day, Lily would realize she could do much better than him either as a friend or as a lover and she'd up and leave was a deeply-suppressed fear, yet it existed all the same. Try as he might, he hadn't been able to shake it for all these years, he'd only been able to hide it. And her words, even if true, brought it to the fore once more.
"Sev?"
Lily's concerned voice snapped him from his musings.
"Is something wrong?" Her words were sweet like honey, and he felt the vast emotional distance between them vanish in the blink of an eye, and now here she stood before him not just physically, but in mind and spirit as well.
Truth, Severus. The last thing you want is a relationship built on lies. Tell her your thoughts.
"Nothing's wrong, Lily…it's just—" he sighed softly, "—it's difficult to say…but I do want to say it—I don't want to hide from you."
"Just take your time, Sev," Lily said earnestly.
She shifted off his lap and sat down next to him. Her fingers quickly reached for his palm and rubbed his pale skin gently.
"I…feel as though—and it's a fear I've had for a long time…that one day you'll see—that you'll see all that you're missing out on—and you'll realize all that you're worth—and your beautiful, verdant eyes will snap open as you learn that you could have the world…and I…can only offer you so much." His gaze fell to his lap, unable to look at her as shame washed over him.
"Sev, look at me." When he didn't, she repeated; "look at me, Sev," and lifted his head with her fingers on his chin.
When he looked back at her, she was smiling and she had tears in her eyes. "I don't want the world, Sev. I—maybe I once did, in my foolish youth…but I realize now—and I have for some time that—" her breath hitched, but her shimmering eyes refused to shed even a single drop. "That sometimes…no, all the time…it's better to be someone's world than to want the world for yourself. And no, no I can't do better than you, Sev; and even if I could, I wouldn't want to. I love you, Sev, and each and every day since I came here all those months ago, I count my lucky stars and marvel at the fact that I still have you—even though I no longer lay claim to all of your heart," she whispered. "It's not you who's lucked out, Sev. It's me. And I—believe me when I say this—hear my heart as I lay it bare for you—the greatest gift you've given me…something I will treasure for all time, is you letting me in here—" she laid her palm flat on his chest, right over where his racing heart beat thunderously in his chest, "—and letting me be your world…letting me be your love. I love you and I think—no, I know that there's nothing I'd rather have in this world or any other, than being the one you choose to cherish and love with all your heart. Each and every day, I consider myself lucky to have you, and for you to give me the greatest gift of all in opening your heart to me and my children. I love you, Sev, and I can't see myself choosing to be anywhere but being parted from your side once again."
She sealed her words with a kiss, but the red-hot intensity of before was gone only to be replaced with a languid passion that spoke of the ever-burning fire they held for one another deep within their hearts. Severus responded far more swiftly to this kiss, but didn't attempt to out-do her in passion or in urgency—only seeking to show that his brand of love for her was just the same. She felt a hand rise to the terrycloth belt holding her robe together, and with a firm tug, it was pulled free and said hand pried her garment open. What he saw beneath her robe had his eyes widening, his breath hitching, and his heart racing; Lily grinned happily upon observing Severus' reaction. With a smirk, she pushed her robe off her shoulders and levitated it away 'til it came to rest on the coffee table. With her robe dangling precariously over the edge of the table, Lily was now clad only in a garment that Severus could only describe as extremely racy. But to be quite frank, he hadn't the foggiest idea what it was, all he knew was that his pants were now uncomfortably tight, and it was barely adequate to cover up all of the bits that should be covered up.
"Like what you're seeing, Sev?" Lily asked saucily.
He could only nod, eliciting a broader smirk from her. Severus had never seen Lily in a teddy before, as a matter of fact, he hadn't seen anyone in a teddy before, and he found himself slack-jawed in her presence.
"Valentine's Day is the day after tomorrow," he mumbled dully, his eyes now glued to her semi-bare midriff.
"Who ever said that I bought this for Valentine's Day?" Lily grinned. "I bought this just for you, Severus, and I have a very different surprise in mind for a couple days from now. Now, come here."
Severus shuffled closer, his eyes still wide and his mouth still gaping. Never in a thousand years could Lily have foreseen his reaction would be quite like this. Smiling, she slid into his lap and straddled his thigh, then looped her arms around his neck as Severus slid his palms over her bare waist.
"Here or upstairs?" she breathed, before kissing his lips softly.
"Here's fine," Severus murmured, kissing her back.
Lily's laugh was soft and lilting. "Eager, are we?"
Severus thought about replying to her teasing, but didn't. Instead, shifting aside the fabric of her teddy and then unbuckling his belt. Lily's eyes gleamed voraciously as she watched and she licked her lips in eager anticipation of what was to come.
Valentine's Day started off as any other day usually did in Severus' household. At five-thirty sharp, Severus left the house to complete his morning rounds, returning to have breakfast with Lily, Harry and Azalea as he did most mornings. A little while later, Lily put her children to task and supervised their reading, whilst Severus went over some of his preliminary plans to create a new habitat in the south west quadrant of the reserve for some Phoenixes. He hadn't much experience with terraforming magic, and sadly, neither did Lily. He'd have to hire outside help to transfigure the land to fit his, rather, a phoenix's needs; and he hadn't nearly made as much progress as he would've liked to on it. Try as he might to keep his focus on his latest project, his thoughts consistently wandered to what he had in store for Lily later that evening. Namely, a private dinner, and a night of lovemaking that he hoped would live up to its billing. He hadn't much experience when it came to planning romantic occasions with a partner, so he was definitely counting on his performance when it counted rather than any intricate planning work he knew he hadn't done. Lily, on the other hand, had some surprises of her own, including chocolate, champagne, and a new lingerie set she hoped would arouse Severus to no end.
Come six o'clock, Severus set out for his evening rounds a little later than usual while Lily supervised her kids' eating. After Severus' returned, Harry and Azalea briefly said hi to him before Lily shooed them upstairs to get ready for bed, and then turned the full-force of her seduction on Severus himself. Dressed demurely, yet exuding copious sensuality, Severus couldn't help but stop and stare when he saw Lily. God, what a breathtaking woman, he thought upon seeing her. Seeing Lily dressed so casually and not going for anything tacky or overly sexual stoked a fire within him that couldn't hope to be put out. He'd never been attracted to Lily because of any sense of over-the-top sexuality; but rather, her easy, attainable beauty that she embodied in her girl-next-door-look that'd ensnared him since his adolescence. The fact that Lily was well aware of how alluring to Severus she was as her normal self meant she never felt the pressure to try to exude an intense sexuality that so enamored James. So, seeing her now dressed as she was in a breezy dress and with her hair done up in a simple chignon; further hammered her attractiveness home. If her goal had been to capture and hold his attention, she'd certainly done that and more.
After all, she pretty much was Severus' girl next door in a way. She'd picked up on what he liked and didn't fairly early on once they decided to give romance a go, and seeing his reaction now to her intended look made her smile and her heart flutter exuberantly.
"Hello Severus," Lily greeted, smiling lightly.
"Good evening Lily," he replied throatily. His eyes fell lower to her knee-length, gauzy dress. "I see you dressed up a little."
"Oh, this old thing?" Lily pinched the fabric close to the hem and lifted it a couple inches. "I just figured I'd throw it on. You like?"
"You know damn well that I do," Severus murmured.
He was right, Lily did know that he loved how she was now much more than if she decided to dolled herself up that'd so enamored many men in the past, James first and foremost. Lily laughed liltingly and offered no resistance whatsoever as Severus pulled her against his chest, holding her warmly as he hungrily sought out her lips with his own.
"You look breathtaking," he murmured quietly.
Her pupils dilated but she hadn't any time to respond before his lips claimed her's once again.
"I'm glad you approve, love; but if you think this is good then you should see what I've got on underneath here," she replied, grinning.
"Later, you insatiable minx," Severus shot back teasingly. "For now, I'm starved and could use a hot meal."
Lily took Severus by the hand and they walked into the dining room where Lily's home-cooked spread awaited them, illuminated by candlelight.
Though the meal was pleasant and peaceful, the anticipation both of them felt for what would come afterwards laid heavy on their minds. For Severus, he was wrought with nerves; unsure of how his attempts at seduction would be received. And as for Lily, she too was incredibly nervous. Though she'd known for some time what turned Severus on, and what didn't; she still couldn't shake that sense of fear that she might've gotten something wrong. She wanted everything to be perfect. Perfect for her, but more importantly, perfect for Sev, too. Tonight she intended to allay his fears that he was punching above his weight. Tonight she intended to make him see that it was she who'd lucked out, not he. Tonight she would prove to him above all that his heart could rest easy in her hands, for she knew the opposite was true and she could trust him with everything she had. By hook or by crook he'd believe her; and she was certain that by night's end she could erase any doubts or fears he had about their relationship and any perceived imbalance of passion or emotion. His fear served as a constant reminder that he was new to all this, this was his first relationship, and it would be his last, too, if she had anything to say about it.
So, when they wrapped up their meal, Severus murmured for Poesy to tidy away their leftovers and swept across the room to Lily's side. She rose to meet him, and they kissed.
"Bed," she murmured.
"As the lady commands," Severus said huskily.
Severus lifted Lily into his arms and swept from the dining room and up the stairs as fast as his long legs could carry them. Lily pried open the door and the two entered their shared bedroom, whereupon Severus set Lily down on her feet. The gasp she gave and the wide-eyed stare she wore as she gazed around the room brought a smile to Severus' lips. His smile would only broaden as her eyes locked on his and she looped her arms around his neck to bring his head lower for a passionate kiss.
"Thank you," she murmured against his lips. "I wasn't aware—I didn't know you'd done this…and I so love you for it. You're the best."
"I do try," Severus whispered back.
Lily pulled back a little as she giggled, before diving back in and kissing him again.
They walked hand in hand to the edge of the bed and sat down, facing the small table upon which their champagne, flutes and chocolates were. Severus poured them both a glass whilst Lily reached for the box of chocolates, popping one between Severus' lips to the man's amusement, and then taking one for herself. Between sips, they fed each other chocolates to the tune of laughter at their adolescent-like antics. As they sat there exchanging chocolates and laughs, Lily realized that Severus hadn't yet experienced things like this. At least, not a normal relationship. He didn't in school, and his only romantic experience with anyone of the opposite sex consisted of the odd one-night stand, to her knowledge. Seeing him let his hair down, so to speak, and enjoying their juvenile behavior and getting numerous laughs out of it had her heart thud loudly in her chest. Her heart would only beat faster when she took in the scene around them and Severus' efforts to make their day memorable in spite of his challenging workload. As a result, she strived to make his, no, their night worth it—she hoped the first of what would hopefully be many positive surprises would come when she'd shed her dress.
After popping one more chocolate into his mouth, Lily smiled and waved her hand in the direction of the table. The table lifted into the air, and with the empty box of chocolates, glasses, and half-finished bottle of champagne balanced precariously atop it, Lily levitated it over to the side of the room out of the way. When she turned back to face him, she saw his dark eyes on her's, almost smoldering in their desire and intensity. He stood to his feet and so did she, her smile turning coquettish as she reached for the straps of her dress and he for the belt on his slacks.
"Undress me?" she suggested, raising her arms.
Severus tossed his belt to the side and undid his cuffs, then stepped forward to Lily and gripped the fabric of her dress. "With pleasure," he replied huskily.
Always the coquette, Lily dared him onwards with a look, and he readily rose to her challenge. His rough hands brushed teasingly over her exposed arms as he lifted the dress off her shoulders and discarded it haphazardly on the floor. Severus' gaze fell with the dress, but when he looked back up from the floor, up her legs, thighs and torso, he felt as if all air had been forcefully sucked from his lungs. Lily was…well, there was no two ways about it, scorchingly hot. Crimson, lace knickers and a matching bra stood out in overly-stark contrast to her pale skin, and Severus' pants suddenly felt very tight and he felt he was very over-dressed. In his haste to shed his shirt and slacks, he nearly tripped and Lily couldn't help but giggle at his expense.
"Allow me," she said, mimicking his words from all those months ago.
Severus lowered his arms to his sides as Lily's deft fingers made short work of his buttons, pushing his shirt off his shoulders. She then knelt before him and gripped the waistband of his pants, tugging them down along with his underwear to free him from his confines. Lily's eyes bulged wide as she glimpsed Severus' bare torso and legs, her gaping mouth and wide eyes bringing a grin to Severus' face.
"Well, it looks you're all rearing to go," Lily grinned, she gave a few, tentative pumps which brought Severus to a full state of arousal.
Severus grinned in agreement and stepped out of his pants and underwear. He then offered Lily a hand and took her to bed, gently depositing her atop the sheets and lying down between her legs, propped up on his elbows. Darting a brief look up at her lustful, smoldering eyes, he licked his lips, tugged aside her knickers forcefully, and leant closer…
The two hours of love-making that followed certainly didn't disappoint. And while Severus and Lily had more than satisfied themselves with the gentle brand of sex they'd become so enamored with, Lily did insist on Severus giving her a couple rounds of rough fucking—but offered up no explanation when Severus asked why. Severus tried to oblige, and he liked to think he succeeded, giving Lily an orgasm before finding release himself; but it just wasn't all that great an experience for him as it brought back memories of years past before Lily's return. Lily sensed Severus' palpable disappointment with their rough sex, so to close out their night of passion, she sought to rock his world one more time, gently, of course. After some work on Lily's part to breathe some life into Severus for the fifth and final time that night, she sank down atop him and kissed him. His fatigue after a tough day out on the range and the rough round of fucking was evident in his dazed form—though his pupils were blown wide as he gazed upon Lily in wide-eyed wonder. The rhythmic rise and fall of her body atop his, the bouncing of her breasts and her enamored, starry-eyed look as she gazed down upon him proved to be too much, as he groaned his release for the final time that night. Lily's umpteenth shuddering climax washing over her mere seconds later.
Severus laid immobile below her as she collapsed atop his broad chest. He wasn't the only one too tired to move, now. With her last bit of energy, Lily propped herself off Severus' chest and rolled to the side, collapsing onto the sheets beside him. Severus reached out for her and pulled her in close, cocooning her against his side.
"I needed that," he wheezed, still trying to catch his breath.
"That so?" Lily laughed, also sounding out of breath. "You're not the only one who did. Thank you."
She received no verbal reply but she expelled a contented sigh as Severus pulled her just that little bit closer.
"I want you to promise me something, Severus," Lily whispered, her request rousing Severus from the brink of sleep.
"Anything."
He felt her frame tremble in his arms, then turning about as her verdant, green eyes found his dark brown ones. "Promise to never leave me, Sev. Promise to always be my world…and to let me always be yours," she said tremulously, her green eyes shining brightly like emeralds in the gloom.
Severus smiled and shifted closer to her, kissing her forehead with the ghost of a touch. "You will always be mine…and I will always be yours, Lily. 'Til the end of time."
Severus lovingly bestowed several kisses on her forehead, then across her temple; while Lily returned the favor at his throat. "'Til the end of time," she repeated, kissing the hollow of his neck once more.
A/N2: If this warrants an M-rating please let me know, but I think it's okay to leave in T for now. I think the Severus-Harry interactions towards the beginning have been my favorite to write so far this story, and I hope you all enjoyed it too. Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed the chapter!