Chapter 11
She lost all track of time as she held Belme close trying to provide comfort as they watched the droid work to stabilize Bly. He had not yet regained consciousness and they were told his loss was substantial. The were so consumed with worry they didn't notice Vader return with a guest.
"This is Doctor Anella, she is my personal physician on the Executor." He introduced her as she walked past the two women and immediately went to work examining Bly. "She will remain here with your handmaiden; she is going to do all she can for the Commander."
"Feeling guilty?" She asked passive aggressively not bothering to even look back at him.
"More like generous. The commander came at me, however, is orders were to protect you and your household…. So, I suppose he was following orders in that moment."
"Vader, why are you back here? What about our daughter?"
"You will be coming with me. My men are waiting outside Theed to bring us up to my destroyer." Vader pulled Padme away from Belme and lifted her to her feet. Padme gave no resistance simply giving Belme a soft smile before being led away.
"Are you trading me for Leia? I'm fine with that… I just need you to promise me you won't let him do to her what he did to you. Please Ani, she is a sweet, innocent miracle and deserves to be raised in the light."
"Where is our Son Padme?"
"Ani, I don't…"
"Obi Wan has him, doesn't he?" She could hear the disgust in his question.
"I wasn't told…. I only knew where Leia was by chance. I saw here with Bail the day you had me at the Senate. Once I knew you were gone, I contacted him, and he agreed to let me see her one last time. Hindsight that was a mistake…. This is all my fault." She was so sick of crying, but it is all she seemed able to do over the last weeks.
"I wasn't told…. I only knew where Leia was by chance. I saw here with Bail the day you had me at the Senate. Once I knew you were gone, I contacted him, and he agreed to let me see her one last time. Hindsight that was a mistake…. This is all my fault." She was so sick of crying, but it is all she seemed able to do over the last weeks.
"I wasn't told…. I only knew where Leia was by chance. I saw here with Bail the day you had me at the Senate. Once I knew you were gone, I contacted him, and he agreed to let me see her one last time. Hindsight that was a mistake…. This is all my fault." She was so sick of crying, but it is all she seemed able to do over the last weeks.
"I wasn't told…. I only knew where Leia was by chance. I saw here with Bail the day you had me at the Senate. Once I knew you were gone, I contacted him, and he agreed to let me see her one last time. Hindsight that was a mistake…. This is all my fault." She was so sick of crying, but it is all she seemed able to do over the last weeks.
"I wasn't told…. I only knew where Leia was by chance. I saw here with Bail the day you had me at the Senate. Once I knew you were gone, I contacted him, and he agreed to let me see her one last time. Hindsight that was a mistake…. This is all my fault." She was so sick of crying, but it is all she seemed able to do over the last weeks.
"I wasn't told…. I only knew where Leia was by chance. I saw here with Bail the day you had me at the Senate. Once I knew you were gone, I contacted him, and he agreed to let me see her one last time. Hindsight that was a mistake…. This is all my fault." She was so sick of crying, but it is all she seemed able to do over the last weeks.
"You expect me to believe that?"
"Anakin, I'm telling you the truth, lying is getting us nowhere and we need to trust each other again. I was with Obi Wan and Yoda, after I gave birth, I was heavily medicated and when I woke from one of the drug induced stupors, I was in they were gone. I don't know where they went, or if they went together."
"You wouldn't even trust me to care for my children…" He spoke bitterly still not looking at her.
"You need to be fair, hours before giving birth I was told you fell to the dark side and you killed younglings. You followed that with attacking me in a fit of unjust rage. I didn't think you would ever hurt me, and you did so I didn't know what to trust at that moment. I had seconds to make a decision and maybe I made the wrong one. "She stopped walking pulling his arm to make him look at her. "I need you to forgive me, the lies weren't told in malice, just in fear."
"Will you ever not be afraid of me?" He cupped her face in his hands before leaning down and resting his forehead against hers.
"I don't know… There are moments I feel like you are the man I have always known but can turn into a stranger in less then a second. You almost hurt Belme and might have cost Bly his life."
"I know… I keep making the same mistakes … I'm trying to control everything and everyone and its…. Can you ever forgive me for hurting you? Please…"
"I have forgiven Anakin…. You also have to forgive yourself before healing can begin Ani."
"I don't know how… "He released her face from his hold and turned away from her again. "We don't have time for this, we need to get to Coruscant."
The rest of the journey to Theed was done in silence, she would steal glances at him, but never once did he look at her. Four of the 501st clones were waiting for them when they arrived and quickly escorted them to the shuttle that brought them up to the Executor. When they were on the destroyer Vader sent her to his private quarters. "Bly was ordered to obey you solely, but these men are mine." Was all he said to her before her left her. She wondered if he had given Bly that order to ensure she was protected even from him. Was that a part of Anakin trying to protect her from his darkness at all costs. Using the chip that she believed still was in Bly's head to benefit in her protection.
Vader's room was very plain, just a sofa, work bench, and Bed. She wasn't surprised though, as a Jedi he had no possessions and even if he were now being paid to carry out Palpatine's will, there would have been no time for him to shop. She did notice there was a small closet to the left of the fresher and it seemed to be filled with some of her clothes, ones he had preferred seeing her in. She looked down at herself noticing she was still covered in blood from trying to help with Bly. She knew it would be almost thirty-six hours before they reached the capital and decided she needed a hot shower to hopefully help calm her.
She spent a good hour just sitting on the shower floor letting the hot water wash over her, she had no more tears to cry she just sat there contemplating everything that has happened over the last Three months. Once she noticed the water was going cold, she quickly washed herself, once she was dry, she slipped into one of the nightgowns he had provided for her and climbed into bed. Perhaps sleep would allow her a few moments peace, she asked one of the clones if they could provide her an aide. It seemed like forever before the door of the room opened and in walked Vader. He removed his mask laying it on the work bench before turning to her.
"Bacca says you requested something to help you sleep."
"I didn't know how long you were going to be, and I thought perhaps sleep would offer relief to my exhausted mind." She just watched him cautiously unable to read which of his million moods he was in.
"When you allowed me in your bed…. What was the sex to you?"
"I don't know that I understand what you are asking?"
"Was it only to distract me?"
"Anakin… I already told you and honestly am offended you think I would resort to using sex to control you. You are my husband, I wanted comfort as much as I think you did. I desire you…. I always have and always will and I slept with you because I am in love with you."
He watched her, contemplating her answer before moving towards her and sitting at the foot of the bed. "I didn't mean what I said…. Another regret is calling you that."
"Whore? Is that the word you are referring to?" She asked sarcastically. "Anakin, I don't understand why you think I would ever let another man in our bed. Where does this come from?"
"…. You really…. Broke me that day with Clovis. When I fought him and you turned on me, you left me. You and Obi Wan had seemed to be getting closer and The Emperor just…."
"Ani… I am so sorry about Clovis. Nothing happened between me and him other then him trying to kiss me before you walked in that night. I wouldn't have let him and would have asked him to leave. Isn't it funny though?"
"Funny? How is it funny?" He stood up and began to pace.
"It funny that Palpatine was convincing you that something was going on and it was him who forced me to work closely with Clovis those last few weeks before he was killed. It was also Palpatine who arranged for Obi Wan to escort me on those missions before you both left for the outer rim sieges. He was playing us. Planting doubt off your insecurities."
He stopped and sunk back down to the bed, "He knew I never thought I deserved you. I told him that every time we parted I feared you would get tired of waiting for me and would find someone else. That I would come back to find you had divorced me and remarried…. I thought he was my friend."
She moved behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist. "Anakin, he fooled us all for a long time."
"You saw through him, that's why you started the Delegation with Senators Mothma and Organa. You kept it from me because you knew I would side with him. You were my wife I should have trusted what you were saying to me…." This was the most vulnerable he has been in front of her in longer then she could remember. There was no anger just pain.
"Ani, Its never to late. We can fix this. We can fight him and set the galaxy back to the way it should be."
"We will. When we get the Coruscant you will make a speech on the holo news announcing our marriage and your support for the Empire. When we meet with him after Leia is safe in your arms, I am going to kill him. I will take the throne with you by my side."
"Ani…. I don't…"
He turned and grabbed her by her jaw before pushing her down on her back and straddling her. "Stop! You will do this Padme; this is the conditions he has given to me to be able to save Leia. You will not argue as this situation is your fault. I could have protected our children." He slowly released his grip on her and leaned down kissing her softly. "Once I have the throne, I will find our son and we will rule as a family. If you want to make things right, if you want to help people you will be my Empress. I already told you I will give you all the freedom to set the laws as you see fit."
She turned her head away from him trying to calm herself. He was right, he could have protected the twins and now it was for her to do whatever was needed to save them. "Just tell me what you want me to do and say and I will. I want out daughter back."
He smiled at her, turning her face back to him so he could see her eyes. "I think I know a way to get you to sleep my love."
"Will you just lay with me? Please. I feel dizzy and I just …. I need my husband's kindness right now."
His expression softened immediately, and he moved off her, pulling her with him to where she now had her head resting on his chest. Using the force, her pulled the blanket over them, kissing her softly on her forehead. "I love you Angel…. Sleep now."
"I love you too…. Milord."
