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9 January 2001
Happy Birthday
Another card had arrived bearing the same handwriting. This time, there was an enchanted illustration inside of Hermione and himself standing at the bar in Malfoy Manor with his face partially blocked while she smirked at him over a glass of martini. Her Really Dirty martini.
It was now that he noticed what she had been wearing that day. The whole situation had been so weird and flummoxed every bit of his sanity that he hadn't noticed she had been outfitted in what seemed to be black long-sleeved dress robes paired with black high-heeled boots. Her hair had been in an updo and emphasised large, gold hoops that went through her ears. Earrings, he thought.
But the detail that caught his eyes were the numerous gold buttons down the front half of her robes and along the sleeves.
-.-.-.-.-
2 May 2001
"Let go of me!"
Severus' solitude on the verandah was interrupted as a couple came crashing through the glass doors. It was obvious the wizard was inebriated. As for the witch, he wasn't quite sure if she was sober or not since she was tottering on dangerously high heels while trying to dodge the wizard's tentacles.
"But 'Mione, you know I want you."
Severus balked as he pressed himself against the periphery of the building. Of all the things he had to witness! He gulped his fruit wine.
"Not when you're drunk, Ronald. Besides, we're at a ball. Behave yourself."
"No one's here."
I am, thought Severus.
"No, Ronald. NO."
The wizard staggered as he came to a stop in his tracks. "You're not the only girl around, 'Mione." Then he turned and went back the way he came from.
"Ron!" But Hermione Granger didn't go after him. She crouched low on the ground holding her head in her hands. "Damn it."
"Are you not going after him?" Severus couldn't help but ask.
Hermione jumped up, wobbling as she grabbed a pillar to steady herself. "Holy crickets! How much did you hear?"
"Everything?"
She covered her eyes with her hand. "How embarrassing."
"We all have those moments."
"Promise me you won't tell anyone."
"I'll be sure to write to Skeeter at once."
"Sir!"
He broke into a smile. "I'm heading back inside. You can have this place to yourself."
Severus proceeded towards the door leading to the ballroom. He felt a tug on his robes and turned. Hermione seemed to be struggling to say something. "Yes?"
"You don't have to go back."
He let out a sigh. "You need some space to recollect yourself before you join in the fun inside."
She shook her head. "I don't think I want to go back inside."
"Surely you realise it isn't over yet. We still have the closing ceremony."
She shook her head again.
"And we have to prance around for photographs that will appear in tomorrow's Prophet."
"Please stay. I could do with someone to comfort me."
Severus blinked rapidly and coughed. "Do not take this the wrong way, Miss Granger."
She smiled a watery smile but didn't say anything.
"While I appreciate your sentiments, I am the last person anyone would want to be comforted by."
"Oh, shut up, Snape. Just stand next to me."
With that, Hermione went over to balcony and gazed out into the beautiful garden. "I wonder what our lives would have been like if we had just been plain old Muggles. No war to fight. No pomp and glory thrust upon us."
Severus had followed her and stood quietly as he reflected on her words. Then he shook his head. "I have no doubt you would have achieved something of equal importance in the Muggle world. You were meant to be an overachiever."
She let out a hoot of laughter and punched him playfully on the arm. "As if that's a bad thing! You would have probably been a scary Chemistry teacher. Hated by all the students."
"Not too different from reality."
Hermione gasped. "No, I meant –"
"That's quite alright, Miss Granger. I know I am not well-liked by most. Hence, I find it odd you would choose to seek comfort in my company."
"I don't hate you."
Severus turned to face her. He tried to read her expression but found he couldn't quite decipher it. All he could sense was that she was not simply trying to make him feel better. He looked away to the garden again as his heart jumped to his throat. "Thank you."
-.-.-.-.-
25 December 2001
Two weeks ago, Hermione Granger had invited him to lunch at her favourite restaurant to discuss something related to her latest cause. But then she cancelled on him just as quickly. So when Severus received the invitation to Christmas at The Burrow, he tossed it into the fire. He would spend the night out at Hog's Head Inn in the company of, well, whoever so desired it.
He wanted to show the world that pathetic, old Severus Snape had better things to do then to meet former students for lunch or attend homely Christmas get-togethers. He absolutely would not be anybody's second choice.
He sipped his pear juice (served in a beer mug) while surveying the crowd at the inn. The clientele had not improved after the war. There were numerous shady characters tonight lurking in the darkest corners of the bar. Severus also noticed that several witches were gathered in small groups and seemed to be having a "witches' night out".
"Is this seat taken?"
Severus turned so quickly he felt pull at the side of his neck. Hermione Granger smiled. He swallowed. He definitely looked pathetic drinking at Hog's Head on his own. "What are you doing here?"
"I skipped out on The Burrow. Ron's bringing Lavender there and I'm not interested in seeing them all over each other."
Severus didn't respond and turned back to his juice.
"I saw you from outside. I was on my way … well, just taking a walk."
He nodded. "Don't let my presence hold you back."
Severus resisted the urge to look at her and took a proper mouthful of his drink instead, dragging his sleeve across his mouth to wipe up the slosh. There, he was not going to pretend to be full of manners tonight. The nerve of the witch to talk to him like as if nothing happened.
"Can I join you?" She sat on the barstool resting one hand on his arm.
"Don't touch me." His voice came out colder than he intended to but the effect was enough. Hermione drew her hand away.
"Why are you so cross?"
He didn't respond.
"Are you still mad about the lunch? I told you I was caught up with work."
"I don't need you to qualify your actions to me."
"Professor!"
"You ought to stop calling me that. I've not been a professor since the war ended."
"Mr Snape, I am perfectly aware of that. Can't you be a little friendly and approachable?"
"We hardly see each other in the span of a year. There is no reason why I have to be amiable around you when there is no occasion to be."
"It's common courtesy."
"Common courtesy would mean that you do not barge in on an acquaintance's private time uninvited."
"Is that what we are? Acquaintances?"
"Are we less then? Pardon my ignorance."
"I saved your life in the bloody Shack, Severus Snape. I would think we are more than just acquaintances."
"I didn't ask for you to be my saviour."
"You can't make me regret my actions."
"Whether you regret it or not is entirely up to you."
"You mean, you'd rather be dead?"
"I wouldn't know since I have not experienced what it is like to be dead."
"You've never once thanked me for saving your life."
"Is that what you do? Save people without asking if they want to be saved, just because you want to hear a thank you?"
"No!"
"Why, thank you, Miss Granger, for your noble actions." He spat out the last few words. "You've always wanted my acknowledgement and recognition. I thought you would have grown out of that phase but it seems you have not."
"Bloody hell! What would it take for you to accept my apology?"
Severus stopped in his tracks while formulating another retort. The witch was red in the face, her eyes brimming with tears. "Tears are unsightly on you."
Hermione rubbed her eyes with the sleeve of her coat vigorously.
He felt guilty for being the cause of her tears. He sighed. "Do not take this the wrong way, Miss Granger."
She hiccoughed.
"I don't belong to the same age group as you and your friends. Your generation doesn't know what it means to be considerate of each other's time. Perhaps, last minute cancellations are the norm amongst you lot. But when you are dealing with me, I suggest you only make appointments you can keep."
She hiccoughed again.
"This is not the kind of place for you to spend Christmas at." Severus drained the last drop of his juice and stood up. "Come."
"I don't want to go there."
He stared back at her until she stood up, still rubbing her eyes. Severus apparated them right to the doorstep of The Burrow and cast a charm on Hermione so her face wouldn't look like she had been crying. He thought it utterly ironic that the reason why he avoided the party was the very reason why he ended up here. But it was worth the trip just to see the look on Ronald Weasley's face when they stepped across the threshold of the house together.
Needless to say, it was an entire raucous at The Burrow and Hermione was swept away at once by the young people. Severus lurked amongst the older folks although he truly wasn't old enough to belong in their group either. He just nursed glass after glass of Molly's homemade apple wine and nodded at appropriate intervals to Arthur's recounts of his exciting discoveries pertaining to "Muggle technology".
Later when Severus returned home, stumbling through the door and feeling as if he had been hit by a cauldron, a shocking pink Christmas card charmed to play the tune of 'All I Want For Christmas is You' came whooshing through the window.
Dear Mr Snape
MERRY CHRISTMAS
I'm truly, so, so sorry. Thank you so much for your time tonight despite being quite the arse x
I appreciate you and your time.
- HG
P.S. I have no regrets.
He frowned at the cross. He knew what it meant even though he was probably one generation too old to know. Surely, she would scratch a cross for all her sodding friends. What a poor choice of a song, too! As if all she wanted for Christmas was him. Surely not? No, he shook his head. But the thought made him slightly out of breath and he had to sit down. The witch was a tease through and through.
He grabbed a piece of parchment and wrote a quick reply before sending it off with an owl.
Merry Christmas, Miss Granger.
I apologise for the harsh words. I assure you that I am fully capable of civil conversation.
In truth, I am grateful to be alive – to have a second chance.
And I am glad that it was you who saved me.
Thank you.
- SS
P.S. Choose a more appropriate song next time unless you plan to send me to the grave so soon after reminding me that you saved my life.
That night when he lay in bed, he dreamt of all the things he knew he could never have.
