Life was full of surprises. Rob didn't get out of bed today expecting to be stretched out between tree branches about twenty feet off the ground, but here he was. Now that all of the snow had melted away, he had walked onto the front lawn and noticed a large branch that was just barely hanging on to the tree itself. Normally, this would not be a significant issue…except that this branch was dangling a few feet above the power line that connected the house to the power grid.
Blizzard season was likely over (one could only hope), but at this point even an average thunderstorm could probably knock the branch down. Rob had called the power company only to be informed that because the tree was on his property, it was his responsibility. What exactly did those people get paid for again?
The ladder didn't even go high enough, so now he was way up off the ground, each foot on a different branch while learning over and sawing through the damaged branch. The handsaw looked sharper than it actually was and this was taking quite a while.
Monika walked out of the front door expecting to find him. Instead, she looked confused. "Rob? Where are you? Kate said you were out here."
"Up here!"
"Huh? Oh!" She stepped backwards in surprise when she saw him. "Be careful!"
"I should be done in a minute or two," Rob replied.
"I wanted to talk to you about something, but it can wait."
Finally the branch came loose. Before it could fall onto the power line, Rob grabbed it with his free hand and rotated it just enough so that it would fall straight to the ground when he let go. Unfortunately, the effort required to pull that maneuver off was too much for one of the branches he was standing on.
Monika shrieked as Rob toppled out of the tree. He slowed his descent by grabbing another branch with both hands and swinging. His shoes collided with the ladder and knocked it over to one side. With his momentum gone, Rob let go and landed on his feet.
"I can't believe that just happened," Monika said.
As he walked back towards the house, he felt a strange pain in his ankle. Monika noticed. "You're limping."
"I must have twisted my ankle," Rob said. "It should wear off, but I'm going to take a break. Tell Kate that I'll be in the bedroom for a few minutes if she needs me."
Monika hesitated but eventually walked towards the background where Kate and the boys were playing on their small playscape. Rob glanced towards the fallen ladder and wondered if he should take it back to the garage. Maybe after he had rested. The broken storm door continued to hang open.
He was asleep within minutes once he reclined on the bed. It wasn't a deep sleep, but a restful one where he was still vaguely aware of what was happening around him. He heard footsteps coming in his direction a few times, only to be followed by the same footsteps leaving the bedroom.
Rob eventually woke up and looked at the time. He was supposed to be at his parents' house in an hour and it was a 45 minute drive.
"Damn," he said quietly as he dragged himself off the bed. Walking into the living room to put on his shoes and jacket, he noticed Monika sitting at his desk with the laptop open.
She turned at him with a nasty expression. "So…you're Sayori's ladder? I think I might puke. All this time I thought she was a good poet."
"What are you doing?" Rob asked.
"You've been lying to me," Monika replied. "I asked you not to talk to her."
"What you asked me was not to try and talk her into forgiving you," Rob said back. "I haven't broached that topic, even though I think it would do the both of you a lot of good."
Monika rolled her eyes and sighed. "I forgot who I was talking to for a second there. Mr. Smartypants who can find a loophole in everything if it means avoiding taking responsibility for anything. You knew this wasn't right or else you wouldn't have kept it from me!"
"Why…why are we talking like this? I'm writing letters and you're treating me like I'm having an affair? I'm not married to you!"
"You're so selfish," Monika said. She was trembling with anger and hurt. "Kate and I do all we can to help you and you want to focus all your attention on Sayori?! How many women need to dote on you before you finally get your act together?!"
Rob smiled incredulously. "You're calling me selfish? That's a good one. What was that phrase again? Just Monika? That's still your MO, isn't it?"
There was a long dreadful silence where Rob wondered if Monika was about to attack him. She wouldn't do that, would she? Not after all the time she had spent here?
In the end, she didn't. However, what she said wasn't far off.
"I hate you."
Rob's heart sank. "I knew you would…eventually."
That was not the retort Monika expected and her angry expression faded. It looked like she wasn't sure what to say now. Rob didn't have time to wait for her to figure it out. If he was late getting to his parents' house, he would never hear the end of it. Without another word, he put on his jacket and opened the front door. As he left, he heard Monika say his name. Was she calling him back for more bullshit? No thanks.
Once he was on the road, Rob put on one of his favorite music playlists but was too deep in thought to pay much attention. Monika seemed to be so different and yet there was one part of her old life that just wouldn't go away. Not even being the only one of the girls from the game to leave their world was enough to put her feelings of jealousy at ease. Maybe he should have seen this coming, but all he wanted was someone in his life who could really understand depression. Others tried, but he always felt like he had to protect them from the whole terrible reality of it. You can only make your life sound so difficult before the important people in your life start to get offended. He wouldn't have had to worry about that with Sayori. But maybe she was right. Maybe he had been selfish. Maybe it was just asking too much.
He arrived at his parents' house to find a heavy bag full of tools waiting for him on a nearby chair.
"That should have everything you'll need," Gene said. "You can keep them for a while in case something else comes up."
"Are you sure?"
His father chuckled. "I've got more tools than I know what to do with in the garage."
Satisfied, Rob sat down on the couch. There was some small talk but it wasn't long until Marie turned the conversation to what seemed to be her favorite topic.
"Have you been applying for jobs?" she asked.
"Not really," Rob answered honestly.
"Why not?"
Spending time with his mother often felt like being an animal stuck in a cage while visitors poked him with sticks. He let out a quiet sigh and scratched his head nervously. "I…I don't have an answer that you'll find satisfactory."
"Depression?" Marie guessed. "That sounds more and more like a cop out these days. Why aren't those pills working? Why isn't your therapist helping?"
"I don't fucking know!" Rob blurted out.
"Watch your language," Gene scolded.
"It just makes everything harder," Rob said. "I know nobody wants to hear that, but it's true. If I was in a wheelchair, nobody would treat me this way."
"If you were in a wheelchair, you would be able to get disability payments. You can't let Kate keep supporting your family by herself. You need to help her."
Rob was getting sick of having this same argument. "Well, I could always just die. The life insurance is more than I'll ever make."
"Don't be ridiculous."
"But think about it! If all that matters is how much money I bring in, then death would be the most responsible choice!"
Marie sighed. "Why do you always have to go to the extreme?"
"Because you're an extreme pain in the ass!"
At this point, his father intervened again and managed to end the argument. The rest of the afternoon went by without incident, as his parents watched a baseball game while he wasted time on his phone. They didn't seem to notice his limping, which was probably for the best. After all, a twisted ankle is a major cop out.
The sun was beginning to set when he finally left his parents' house. A lot of trouble for just a bag of tools, but at least he might be able to fix the storm door. He tossed the bag onto the empty passenger seat without bothering to clip it shut.
The drive was a nice chance to calm his nerves. There was always a little bit of unpleasant needling when he saw his parents, but they had really ambushed him this time. They would probably go easier on him in general if he did get a more significant job, something even he knew would happen eventually.
Kate once told him how she felt uneasy when someone who has lost a lot of weight suddenly received tons of praise from their friends and family. The implication was that they weren't worthy of it while they were fat. He found his situation vaguely similar. If he did find the "right" job, he would surely be praised and that annoyed him since it suggested he didn't have any worth otherwise.
For the drive home, he decided to just put the music on a randomly selected playlist instead of one of the regulars. It was nice to hear songs he hadn't thought about recently and there were many smiles of recognition as the daylight faded and a light rain began to fall. When he was about fifteen minutes away from the house, an unexpected song began. It was "Sinead."
As soon as it started, he knew he had to apologize to Monika. Her reaction had come from fear of losing him. She had to be reassured that wouldn't happen.
Rob's train of thought was interrupted by an actual train. The railroad crossing lights were blinking and the small barrier had lowered. He was fairly close to home now and despite all the times he had driven over these train tracks, this may have been the first time he actually saw one crossing. As Rob watched the freight cars go by, he wished Andrew was with him. He would have loved this.
A few moments later, he was on the other side of the railroad tracks as "Sinead" reached its final chorus. One of his favorite pizza places was coming up on the right and a smaller road was on the left. The next song was one he hadn't heard in a long time.
These are my final lines
I've lived all my nine lives
Out of nowhere a car crossed the road in front of him. It came from the street to his left and was likely headed for the pizza joint's parking lot. The driver had barely stopped at the stop sign and clearly hadn't checked for other cars. Rob let out a gasp and slammed the brake as hard as he could. The road was wet from the rain and not ideal for a quick stop.
Time slowed down. Rob realized that a collision was coming.
"Ah shit."
At the last second, he instinctively swerved the car to the left so the empty passenger side would take the brunt of the impact. The music abruptly stopped and was replaced by the sound of metal crashing together. Pain erupted in so many different places that he couldn't keep track of it all .The other car's forward momentum spun Rob's vehicle back to the right and pushed it into the nearby parking lot. A white balloon popped out of the steering wheel and smacked Rob in the face.
The open tool bag was launched into the air at the moment of impact. Screwdrivers and wrenches became shrapnel. Rob felt them tear at his face and neck. Blood clouded his vision. Finally, the car came to an abrupt halt. Everything went dark.
All these years with depression and this was how he was going to die. Life was full of surprises.
