11 days since the last update...not bad but still not as soon as I would've liked. I'm personally very proud of this and the next chapter. I was very worried they would become filler chaps but they turned out to have tons of foreshadowing and drive forward the emotional part of the plot in ways i never expected!

I was listening to a lot of Yugioh Disney Themes that turned into listening to a lot of Music Videos about Marik which both brought a fresh new perspective to the trauma he went through and gave the story a lot more flavor in terms of some of my "evil plans" Mwahahahaha!

That said-I ended up creating a soundtrack for this chapter:

Falling Inside the Black-Skillet (Yugi and Yami's segment (combined both the manga scene of them leaving the hospital and Yugi and Yami's alone scene from episode 52, another episode 4Kids totally butchered for unknown reasons)

Be Prepared—Lion King, Jeremy Irons (For Kaiba's test of Obelisk 'enough said!)

Monster—Skillet (Marik's Nightmares-actually came from a random youtube video but just fit perfectly! God I love music!)

Disclaimer: Yu-Gi-Oh Duelist belongs to Kazuki Takehashi, these are his ideas and I confess most of the dialogue was taken from either the manga or the Japanese adaption, but the Character's emotional states are my elaboration)

That said...anyone wanna dissect the title ;)

SPECIAL SHOUT OUT FOR YESTERDAYMAYBE! For being an awesome friend and fellow dark/librashipper! HAPPY BIRTHDAY GIRL!


Sunshine, Steel, Shadow

"I'll be out of here before noon!" Yugi cheered with a bright, beaming smile and leaned back, hands gripping the railing and taking in the warm late spring air. "First I'll stop by school for a bit, then this afternoon I promised to hang out with Jounouchi!" He couldn't stop giggling.

You're in a surprisingly good mood, Yami teased, arms crossed, his own stance opposite Yugi's. For someone who has at least a week's work of school work waiting for him.

Yugi snorted. "Actually, grandpa took care of that for me. Being in the hospital 'cause you were caught in a burning building is a pretty good excuse to not have to make up any work. So Ha!"

After four days in recovery and nearly a week in the hospital, Yugi was ecstatic to finally be given a clean bill of health and permission to leave his room while waiting for his friends and grandfather to check him out. The sunlight felt wonderful on his skin even through his uniform—he didn't even mind that it was all he had to wear, he was so sick of pajamas. Below, the city of Domino stretched before him like a never ending tapestry of possibilities.

They stayed like that: enjoying the well-deserved peace and the time alone. And yet a tension hung heavy between them, not thick but there like a mist separating then by the thinnest of veils.

Yugi… Yami broke the silence. Thank you.

Yugi looked surprised. Then hesitated. "It was Jounouchi who saved me." He had been unconscious, of course, but he remembered his friend's voice, those familiar arms carrying him, the heat of fire on his skin and the cool rush of fresh air.

We have good friends,

"Yeah," Yugi agreed. His fingers spread nervously then curled in frustration. The question was heavy in his mouth, hesitant, desperate, not wanting to be asked, but ask it he must. "Other me…" he started unsure how else to start.

Yami's questioning eyes urged him to continue.

"Who are you really? I want to know?"

The curious lines of the spirit's expression fell into a neutral mask. Why?

"It's because…" Yugi hesitated, worried his lip. How did he explain? How did one ask a friend such questions knowing they knew so little about themselves? "Ryou's Millennium Ring personality said something like…" he paused, stomach sinking. " 'The one who solves the millennium puzzle will have the duty of awakening the King's memories'…are you…" He stopped again. Was it fair to ask his dark half this? "Are you…a king?"

And there it was.

He looked to his other self for an explanation, but Yami did not meet his eyes. His gaze was vacant as he stared out over the city, distant with longing and Yugi wondered if he was imagining looking out over another landscape from long ago.

Then the spirit sighed and closed his eyes. I don't know anything. It was a whisper so low and sad that Yugi almost did not hear it. And for someone like his other half who did everything big, everything wild, everything in some great grand spectacle: the sheer defeat of it was louder than any echo.

I knew you'd ask me someday…I don't remember where I came from…where I belong or even my name…

They had never spoken about it before…of who Yami was or where he'd come from. Who he was before he was…Yami. Their acknowledgement of each other had been gradual, confirmed only when it became impossible for Yugi to deny the other's existence any longer, and even then, they only met thanks to the Spirit of the Ring's twisted game. Pegasus has certainly hinted at something, but even his knowledge told them nothing they didn't already know—or didn't know. And even then it had been easier to simply push it away—to pretend to let go of the past and create new memories together. To acknowledge the puzzle as the precious treasure that brought them together and nothing more. Yugi had wished for a friend hadn't he? And Yami wished for freedom from the darkness he'd been trapped in. Was that Fate being kind or simply Irony being cruel? Or both.

All that had changed now.

From what Mr. Otogi had said—and his Grandfather had confirmed—the legend of the Puzzle, its power, the "spirit" within it, all of them spoke of something far greater than two young boys whose met under odd circumstances and formed a friendship.

Something that everyone seemed to know far more about than Yami did.

Something that Yugi knew, knew, no matter how much his friend denied or tried to hide it—bothered him terribly.

I do know that my origins come from somewhere in ancient Egypt, and that I can exist through you, when you wear the Millennium Puzzle, and that the Puzzle is one of six other items, but…that's all.

"I'm sorry." Yugi apologized immediately. His friend sounded so lost that Yugi regretted ever asking. "I shouldn't have brought it up."

If the Spirit heard him he gave no indication. His eyes were elsewhere. There's a stone tablet in the Valley of the Kings where the puzzle and those six items will fit."

"That's enough." Brushing aside his fears, Yugi smiled. "Let's change the subject."

But the Spirit was lost in his thoughts. Maybe if I go there…

"Enough!" Yugi shouted jumping up and whirling on him.

Stunned, Yami stepped backed, stared at his other self, and was surprised by the plethora of emotions he found there: regret, remembrance, adoration, love, grief, guilt…oh, so much guilt. Collecting himself, the spirit smiled and cupped Yugi's hands, looked into those eyes sparkling as if on the verge of tears.

Yugi returned his smile and gave an excited little hop. "Let's get going! We can meet Jounouchi at his place! Who cares if I'm out a little early? I'm sick of being in the hospital."

The sudden burst of enthusiasm might've fooled anyone else, but Yami knew better.

Yugi, he called commanding the boy to stop and poured all his emotion and honestly into his words. I want to be with you forever…I don't care if I never find my memories!

He stared at Yugi's back, hands clenched nervously at his sides. Waiting for a reaction, a response, something.

Yugi's shoulders shook, trembled, droplets suddenly hit the floor and when Yami appeared besides him he saw that Yugi was crying. "Me too…me too…forever."

He clenched the Puzzle lovingly in his hands and Yami felt the warmth radiating through it. "You can have my memories so…"

He felt Yami wrap his arms around his shoulders and relaxed into the embrace. He let his tears finish on their own and then smiled up at his dark self.

When something caught his attention, Yami smiled and gestured with his chin. Look Yugi.

Yugi followed his gaze and laughed excitedly.

Looks like our friends are early too.

And sure enough Anzu was already waving up at them. Jounouchi and Honda were engaged in another argument that was one insult away from coming to brawls. Ryou was smiling, looking as absent minded as ever and Ryuchi stood at Anzu's side looking half-nervous, and half-relieved to see him up and about.

Drying his tears, Yugi waved back and hopped down to go and greet them, giving Yami a nod as he vanished back into the puzzle.

But Yugi hadn't missed the sadness tugging at his friend's smile.

Alone now, he pulled the article from his pocket that his hospital roommate had been kind enough to let him keep and stared into the eyes of the beautiful exotic woman who wore around her neck what could only be a Millennium Item.

Ishizu Ishtar. Security General, Egyptian Supreme Council of Antiques.

He and Ryou had studied that article for hours after everyone left, but it gave little information on the mysterious woman outside her role and office. Even though his Father owned the museum, Ryou had no answers, either.

According to the article, the exhibit would focus on ancient games and their relationship to political battles from around the 18th Dynasty, its opening date two months away, just in time for the summer vacation. The feature was a special artifact depicting an ancient battle involving a powerful King whose name was currently unknown—that alone was striking, both boys knowing full well the importance and power of names in Ancient Egyptian culture. Your name was your identity, your personality, your being and soul, your shield from demons and darkness. To not have one…

He crushed the article, his thoughts immediately turning to Yami—the friend he would give anything not to lose.

I can feel it. He thought, pulling out his school book and carefully slipping the article between the pages. The charms of his bracelet twinkled with a soft chiming sound as his fingers brushed the page where Khazamaa's latest gift was pressed between the pages: Starflower for strength, Goldenrod for courage, Dandelion for overcoming hardships.

Overcome, Yugi clenched it tight in his arms, pressed the flowers and their message close to this heart. The comfort was small, but Yugi needed it.

Something is about to happen…Something big.

X X X

"Main Computer System Activated."

The robotic voice echoed through the simulation chamber: a metal marvel of Kaibacorp technology. On the surface it was an enormous, windowless, enclosed room made entirely of metal with a single viewing box, but once the holographic receptors were activated it could become anything, any place, any one.

It was one of Seto's proudest creations.

The new duel disk system strapped to his arm, a perfected and much more durable and convenient version of its predecessor. He looked at it proudly.

It had been a tall order, perfecting a new model in time for the tournament, forcing him to call out of school for a few weeks and costing him several nights of precious sleep, but the end result was worth it. It would take at least another month to finalize all the details of his planned Battle City tournament—and give the Ishtar woman's exhibit time to build traction. His team had been less than excited about putting together an entire tournament in under three months, but in the end they'd swallowed their frustration like good employees and did their work and did it well. He, himself, had been the primary designer of the new duel disk system and now all the fruits his labor were about to bear flesh and seeds.

He'd designed it with only one thing in mind.

Yugi. The name was all he had, but the image that came to his mind was not the bright-eyed, sweet-faced boy he'd seen and known from school, but the sharp-eyed and sharp-featured presence with that annoying and alluring shit-eating smile he'd glimpsed only when he dueled him. Kaiba was not naïve, nor did he believe in Ishtar's nonsense about past lives and reincarnation, but he'd seen the subtle changes whenever he and Yugi dueled. They were small things at first: a difference in posture, a deeper alto in his voice, a radiant confidence that Yugi, the true Yugi, had never shown. There were other things too: physical differences that could've easily been overlooked as a trick of the light but not to someone like Seto Kaiba.

He didn't know who or what the "Yugi" he dueled was—a split personality of Yugi's, a part of Yugi himself that only appeared when he dueled, or (if he did chose to entertain the Ishtar woman's fantasies) some separate entity all together.

He did not care.

Yugi…You are the only duelist I recognize as a rival. Only you and I have true pride.

That very realization sent a thrill through him: firing his blood and filling him with excitement. The duel disk activated and the duel with the computer began. It would certainly be interesting to see how he did against his own ultimate power deck, equip with all three Blue Eyes White Dragons, but more than that…it was a test.

A test of his own resolve, his own strength, and his own weakness that he would overcome by facing himself…just as he had "rebuilt the puzzle of his life" after their last duel, when "Yugi" had faced all three of his Blue-Eyes, stared defeat—and him—right in the face and smirked.

When the next generation of duel disks is perfected, Battle City will begin…for us! And there it was, the true reason he'd agreed to the Ishtar woman's plan. So what if that was you on that ancient carving, it's just a rock to me. This is my era. I'm only interested in the enemy in front of me…

He paused, the word enemy sitting uncomfortably in his throat. Is that who you are, Yugi? Are you the embodiment of some ancient grudge? Do you still seek the lost honor of the past?

Kaiba snorted, knowing only t0o well how stupid living or holding onto to any part of the past was. He'd learned long ago, things such as grief and memory only led to suffering and pain. They were things that held you back and made you weak. How many times had he longed for those happy moment with his mother and father—only to wake up unwanted and unloved in the home of his relatives who coveted their inheritance and used it until there was nothing left? Dreamed of his warm house and warm bed only to awaken in that cold, dank crowded orphanage with Mokuba curled up close to him? How many times had he dreamed for, longed for, hoped to find himself in the loving embrace of his parents only to find himself trapped in his clutches.

No, never again would the past hold him prisoner. Never again would he hold himself back from his destiny, or let the legacy of others command him like his had—even nearly costing him Mokuba.

Twice.

Never again.

The past was past and he'd put it behind him. As much as he'd loved his parents and they him, they were gone and he had made peace with that. Even though that monster had left a long, deep mark upon him (and begrudged as he was to admit it, Seto was grateful to Yugi, the Heart of the Cards and that "Other Yugi" for helping him overcome that bastard's influence), his stepfather was dead and gone, good riddance. And grateful as he was to this "Other Yugi", if he truly was intent to live in the past instead of owning his present, then perhaps he was Seto's enemy.

"Then…" Seto smirked, decided and drew his hand. "I will take the glory of the future!"

As three Blue-Eyes White Dragons stood viciously before him, his own deadliest possible attack suddenly turned against him, Seto, for the first time that duel, felt fear grip his heart.

He heard its pounding echo in his ears and with the repetitive bum-dum came a conjuration of another who'd once stood where he stood and faced down these three vicious creatures who were the ultimate representation of power.

Yugi, again his thoughts conjured the image of the young man he saw only in glimpses between duels. The boy whose alluring smirk and aloof energy even now in the face of hopelessness both haunted and inspired him. When you faced down my three blue-eyes, you stood up to them without fear…you believed in your cards…you took the challenge with courage and you won!

The memory of that victory, of "Yugi's" confident smirk and unwavering faith, and his own utter defeat: it sparked something alive inside of him.

The machine entered the battle phase—initiated multiple blue-eyes attack.

"I will seize the future!" He activated Negate and when the battle phase ended—gambled everything on his next draw.

Obelisk rose from the depths of destruction: massive and monstrous, the embodiment of power and prestige like the very God of whom he was avatar. It devoured Seto's remaining monsters, utilizing their life force as fuel for its ultimate attack and Seto watched with triumphant glee as it obliterated the three dragons and his enemy's life points with such power that even his defeat at the hands of Yugi's Exodia was but a gleaming candle about to blow out in comparison. The great beasts that were once the embodiment of power and glory, his power and glory, vaporized into pieces with a single punch! What a beautiful metaphor it was—that the creatures who represented his old self should fall so spectacularly to the glorious might of his new monster, his new self: a God. He now wielded a God!

Even the computer was unable to read the might and he watched with an intoxicating satisfaction that morphed into sheer and absolute delight as the computer overheated and shot-circuited under the superior might of his god to Mokuba's cheering from the viewers box!

And Gods only chose the worthy.

Seto couldn't stop smirking, it was a miracle of his will that he did not laugh!

He didn't care that everything was electrifying around him, even after they shut down the simulations and recalled the computer duelist, even then Obelisk remained behind him, a testament to the God's power even beyond that of its card prison.

"Only two legendary gods remain." He stared at Obelisk for a long time, lust-driven by power and possibility. "No matter what enemy stands in my way I will find the two remaining Gods and I will make them mine!" A chuckle rose, bubbled in his throat, first a snicker, then a laugh then a full blown fit of mad laughter: triumphant and terrible. "And when that day comes, I will be the King of Duelists!"

He laughed again, already drunk on victory, deciding then and there, there would be no delays. Battle city would begin as soon as Domino High let out for the summer, one week after the Ishtar woman's trap was to work its magic, and plenty of time for "Yugi" to familiarize himself with both.

Wait for me Yugi…He would fight Yugi again. Yugi or his other self, it did not matter and he did not care! He would face him. He would win. He would prove that only he was worthy of being his one true rival…his one true everything.

And if this "other" Yugi was determined to live in the honor of the past, he chuckled. Well then, Seto would just drag him into the future!

X X X

Pain….

All he felt was pain….

So much pain….

No…

Darkness…it was all he saw…all he felt…

Darkness dragging him down, down into that dark, terrible place he'd escaped long ago.

No…Please, no…not there…

He kicked, screamed, begged, pleaded.

Please…no…don't take me back there…please!

He wept, fearfully as they dragged him down there, remorse etched into each and every line of their faces though there was nothing they could do.

And he remembered.

Remembered darkness, candles glowing like mortuary saints, remembered as he was stripped and tied to the table with his back exposed like some gruesome, grizzly canvas for a monster.

Please stop! No…I don't want to remember this!

But he did remember.

And what he remembered…all he remembered…was pain.

Pain…so fierce and angry, digging, clawing, cutting into his skin like some savage, evil beast was tearing him apart.

Pain…fierce, furious burning pain, like his back had been set on fire and was burning uncontrollably until he was numb to anything else but the burning.

Pain…horrible, awful, terrible pain, like a thousand needles piercing and shooting out of his body like some monster trapped beneath his skin was struggling savagely to escape him.

Pain….long, never-ending unbearable pain that lasted for hours, hours, and he was there for each and every single second of it…praying for it to end…praying for death…for an end to this terrible suffering, but salvation never came. And long after it was over the pain remained, until it was all he had left.

Pain…that hurt so much…it made him want to destroy himself.

And then there was only Darkness…cold and cruel and always there.

Surrounding him…

Suffocating him…

Laughing at him….

Laughter like some maniacal monster echoing and bouncing off the walls to drive him mad…

And just before the Darkness swallow him whole…

Warm arms catching him…driving back the darkness…soothing his pain...

Relief for the smallest of moments.

But always there at the recesses of his mind was the Darkness…

Always there…

Always laughing….

Marik shot up panting in his bed. Eyes darting and reaching desperately for a lamp until the room was flooded with electric light. Bright artificial light, not the sinister glow of candles. The windows and walls were that of Rishad's yacht and not the windowless stone walls so deep underground that shadows and darkness reigned.

He collapsed back against the bed, still shaking, still scared, almost as scared as he'd been that day six years ago…

The day when…

No! He shook his head. Desperate and determined to rid himself of the memories.

He wasn't in the tombs.

He was here. He was safe. He was out.

He got out.

He got out!

He collapsed in relief at that realization. That fact. Drank it in until he felt sick with it and then drank in some more. He drank it in until he felt alive again.

Until he could breathe.

And whenever his fears started to consume him—he remembered Yugi, his Yugi, his Queen—and his mission: to free his Queen, his people and himself from the Darkness that parasite had put them all in.

Yes…

He would not fail.

He drifted off to sleep with that revelation—his final thoughts of Yugi.

He didn't notice the Millennium Rod's stagnant glow on his night stand.

He didn't know that the souls inside, constantly at war, suddenly felt the shift in power that was the awakening of a God, the slow corruption of a vessel who was already failing his Divine Test, and the Threat of Fate that only comes when make a decision is made, snapping. Nor that one was despairing and the other could not stop laughing.


This was a very fun but very tense segment to write. Originally, Marik's segment was only meant to illustrate what was going on with tr Rod (foreshadowing there-anyone wanna guess ;)) but exploring some of my favorite Marik and Yami Marik youtube videos offered a fresh look on his childhood-including all the trauma that the Japanese edition expanded on and the English adaption cut for obvious reasons-though I wish they didn't. And, being very close to people who suffered from abuse and trauma in the past, believe me when I say it makes sense that even after six years it would still affect him.

This is why all of Yugioh's villains (well, the "good" ones or anti-heros) are awesome! Seriously, Kaiba, Otogi, Marik, even Bakura and Atem are characters who suffered from an intense level of trauma or child abuse (still in Jounouchi's case) and without that all these characters would not be half as sympathetic as they are. Especially Marik.

Anyway, it was just great to dig deep into the mindscape of two of my favorite characters (Marik and Seto) and explore their similarities and connections (via the Rod and others) and how they deal with their pasts traumas. I hope to dig deeper in to physiology of these characters and others in the future.

Until them...read, review, post comments, ask questions, post theories, and go nuts! I'm very curious to see what theories come out of this one ;)