A/N: Hello loves. It's been quite a while since my last update and I can't promise speedy updates anymore. I'm struggling to write these days and for a number of reasons. But I'll try when I can. Be patient and enjoy.
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Sadie ran a hand through her hair as she stumbled outside into the cool morning air and listened to the birds chirp. Sticky remnants of tears trailed down her face, painful reminders that she had cried for most of the night, in that pitiful excuse of sleep she had done. Her body hurt, especially her chest and head. Her stomach was tight and all she wanted to do was run or collapse into a little ball and scream for Emmett to come for her. Something told her that he would hear her and break all the rules just to see her again.
I can't do that to him, she told herself, lowering her hand slowly. I can't do that to any of the Cullens. Once I crossed that border between the wolves and the Cullens, I became unable to be touched by the Cullens except at school when I go back there. It's the only way that I can feel like I'm protecting them and feel safe…then why do I feel like this? Why am I still so scared? Why am I in so much pain and feel so scared that something bad is going to happen now that I've made this choice? Did I make the wrong choice in coming to this place, coming to Sam and his wolves to learn? Should I have listened to stupid Edward?
Sadie hated that she was doubting herself. But that's all she had ever known since her sister and the others died. She sighed and walked around the house, thinking and trying to ignore the pain in her chest. All she wanted was to forget about that pain, but she knew it would never go away as long as she was here and away from Emmett. Emmett was the one person that could take the pain away and she couldn't be with him again. Because it was too dangerous.
"Sister, why did you have to die?" Sadie asked, looking up at the sky at the gray clouds that were rolling in. "Why did any of you have to die that day?"
Images of the enemies and the battlefield came rolling back in to the forefront of Sadie's mind, making her freeze. Her body grew cold and her eyes grew wet again as she remembered all the blood and growls, the shrieks that had come as vampire and wolf collided in battle and her sister urged her to run away, to save herself. Sadie wasn't aware that she had collapsed onto her knees until Sam's face was in front of her and the Alpha was saying her name, tapping her cheek with warm fingers.
"Sadie, focus, Young Wolf," he urged, staring her in the eyes. "Focus."
The girl blinked and shook her head. "Sam…"
"What happened?" Sam asked, cupping her chin.
"I was just thinking about things and I don't know…I got overwhelmed, I guess," Sadie said, shrugging her shoulders.
"No, that is not what I am talking about." Sam's gaze held her own and burned through her. "What happened to them, to you?"
Sadie looked at him with wide eyes. "Are you really going to make me recall my worst memories, Sam?"
"Yes, I am. To help you."
Sadie jerked her chin out of his grasp and looked down at the grass under her. "My sister and several of my packmates…they Imprinted on a coven of vampires led by Felix and Felix and his coven did the vampire equivalent, I guess. All I know is that they were all in love and happy to work with each other. We were happy and we cared for each other. We worked as a family, a mixed family, but a family nonetheless."
"You were a pack of wolves and vampires?"
"Yes, so that's why I'm not bothered by vampires as much as some wolves tend to be. I'm used to them and they don't bother my nose as much. Felix's pack didn't smell too awfully sweet to me and I was happy with them. They were kind to me. They treated my sister and my pack with respect and honesty. They never harmed a person."
"So they were like the Cullens in the manner they practiced feeding?"
"Yes…and still they attracted the attention of another pack of wolves because vampires and wolves should never mix, right? Right. Because that's some kind of abomination in the world. Even if they get along in peace and never hurt anyone and try to stop the bad vampires from hurting people. No, can't have that. No, all vampires and vampire sympathizers must die." She shook her head and felt a tear trickle down her cheek. "We got a warning from the Alpha of the group, disband or there would be a war. Basically, kick out the vampires or we would risk being put to war with their pack and we didn't even know how many was in their pack.
"My sister, Amanda, didn't want to disband. She knew something about Imprints, I guess. And Felix didn't want to abandon her. None of the other wolves wanted to give up their loved ones. We were family. We were together. We'd been together for years. We loved each other and we took care of each other, God dammit! Those wolves had no right to tell us to break up and go our separate ways just because they didn't like that we were a mixed pack of supernatural creatures. It wasn't fair!"
Sam was patient at her outburst as she slammed her fist into the ground. "What happened next, Young One?"
"Amanda ignored the warning and prepared the pack for whatever was to come. She and Felix made preparations with them, training them hard. All of them but me because I hadn't made it through a month of my transformation yet, but they were proud of me just the same. They kept a close eye on me all the time. Well, Felix did because he had a feeling that I could be used as leverage I guess. But nothing happened until one night when the wolves from the other pack suddenly attacked us."
Sadie's eyes grew wet again as she remembered the scene. "There were forty of them compared to us. We never stood a chance, but we fought hard. We fought as a team. They were uncoordinated and sloppy, but they had more fighters and they were strong…it was a blood bath and so many fell…Oh God, it was a nightmare to see it all." She let him into her thoughts so he could see what she had witnessed that night. "Amanda grabbed me with Felix and told me to run, ,run far away and keep running, to just go. Don't look back, don't come back. I hadn't been prepared to fight. I hadn't been prepared for any of that. I couldn't even hug her or Felix before they pushed me away and went on fighting and I ran…"
The tears started falling hard. "I ran back to the house and I did what I had been mentally ordered to do. I grabbed what I could fit into my backpack and then I burned the house down before running away. I kept listening for them, kept calling out my location to them. But they faded, one by one. Until I was screaming to no one but myself. And then I stopped. I just kept running because that's what Amanda and Felix told me to do. I ran and I ran because I couldn't fight and I couldn't save them. I couldn't tell those fucking wolves that there's nothing wrong with a pack that is mixed with vampires and wolves. I'm alone now because of that and it sucks; And I'm so scared that it's going to happen again and I'm not ready…I'm not ready…"
Sadie buried her face in her hands and started sobbing, her entire body trembling. Sam put his hand on her shoulder and let her cry, offering silent strength.
OOOOOOOOOOO
Emmett moved through the house, feeling his heart ache. He wanted nothing more than to leap out the window and run across that border to Sadie because something in his gut told him that she wasn't doing too good. That she needed him just as much as he needed her. That she was scared and in pain.
Sadie, I need you to come back, Wolf Girl, he thought, running his hand over his face. Please. Just come back.
He shoved his hand in his pockets and touched his phone. Withdrawing it, he stared at it in fasciation for just a moment before pressing a few buttons and pressing it to his ear. A few rings later, he heard a click.
"You're not supposed to call me," Sadie's voice met his ears, sounding sad and tired and a little bit annoyed.
"If I'm not supposed to call you, then why did you answer?" Emmett shot back, feeling relieved just to hear her voice.
"Good point."
"Please don't hang up," Emmett said quickly, realizing his mistake. "Sadie, please, please don't hang up."
Sadie sighed. "What do you want, Emmett?"
"I want you to come back across the border," Emmett whispered, holding his phone tightly. "It's only hurting the both of us for you to be over there and not with me."
"I'm…I'm not hurting," Sadie told him before hissing.
"Liar. I can hear it in your voice. You're in pain and that kills me, Sadie. I want to protect you, to keep you safe, and I can't do that if you're over there where I can't touch you."
"I'm trying to keep the both of us safe. I'm trying to keep your family safe."
"From what? Nothing is going to come and get us. You left them all behind when you ran away from wherever you came from. It's safe now. You're safe now. Sadie, come home again. Come back to me, to us."
"Emmett, I can't."
"Sadie…I need you to come back. I can't sleep without you."
"Vampires don't sleep, Emmett."
Strike one. "I still need you back. I can't function. I miss pestering you and holding you in my arms. And Rosalie is being annoying with her bitchiness. And…Sadie…please, I can protect you, that's what I'm supposed to be able to do. Let me prove all the things to you that a good boyfriend should. You can trust me."
"I can't even trust myself at the moment, Emmett. How can I trust you? How can I trust anyone?" She sounded like she was crying now and it broke his heart because there was nothing he could do but plead with her to come back to him. "I need to stay here and you need to let me go and do this."
"Sadie, I can't."
"Don't call me again."
"Sadie…"
"I can't pick up the phone for you anymore, Emmett."
"Sadie, please."
"I love you. Goodbye."
"Sadie, wait. No."
But it was too late. She had already hung up and was gone. Emmett redialed her number and all he got was disconnected. He tried one more time before letting out a groan. She wasn't going to pick up, just like he said. He could try texting her, but he doubted that she would respond to any of those either and he really needed to hear her voice.
Emmett heard the whisper of feet on the floor and looked to his left. Rosalie was stalking past with a sway in her hips. She looked at him with an innocent smile on her face and waved, putting a pout on her lips and batting her eyelashes. He'd seen that look before.
"Not fucking interested," he snarled, shooting daggers at her. "So take your trashy self somewhere else, Rose."
That wave turned into the bird and Rosalie stalked away, looking insulted but happy that things were turning sour for him and Sadie. Emmett wished he could tear her a new one, but he didn't want to touch her. He slumped down against a wall and ran a hand over his face.
How am I supposed to get Sadie home? How?
OOOOOOOOOO
A/N: I tried to get back into the swing of things. I think I might have failed a bit. But I'm happy that I actually touched my longer fanfics lately. I haven't done that in such a long time that it's hard to believe that I got anywhere. Please leave a review if you'd like. Thank you and have a wonderful day. -Scarlet
