Disclaimer: I do not own DanMachi or any of Omori's original characters, nor do I make any profit off of my writing.
"Aiz? Would you be so kind as to introduce our guests?"
The girl blinked. She hadn't been expecting that, but alright. Even if she chose not to speak most of the time, she couldn't help but feel a little giddy about introducing their special guest this time around. They were very close to her heart, after all.
"Everybody, this is my daughter. Garbanzo Bean. A slight upon her is a slight upon myself."
Then, she sat back down without another word, elegantly cradling her kitten in her lap and bringing small spoonfuls of the stew to Bean's lips.
Bell's gaze from her right was promptly ignored. He could introduce himself damnit, she was still mad at him.
Finn snorted into his mug, using the mead to hide his amused smile, while the rest of the familia just shrugged it off, not at all offended by the Kenki's seemingly blase introduction. There were a few lingering glances toward the trio of newcomers, most of which accusatory glares by then men of the familia who did not take Bell's closeness to 'their' Sword Princess lightly.
Of course, Aiz's silent treatment did not last long when it had to contend against jealous rage. There was no way in hell she was going to let Bell be alone with Tiona and Tione. She didn't even know if Bell would like them but she did know that they were both beautiful and that was a risk she was simply not willing to take. She trusted him to stay loyal to his partner, the issue was she still hasn't given him an answer on his proposal and-
"Hey! Argo-kun!"
His name ist Bell, harlot! Uh, oh. Whither didst that come from?
"You seem pretty close to Aiz, dont'cha? Why's that?"
He blinked.
Then, he blinked again.
Aiz narrowed her.. well.. eyes at him. Thou shalt choose thy answer wisely or stuff'r mine wrath.
His face paled slightly as he met her gaze, his.. throat.. thingy? bobbed up and down as he swallowed nervously. "Uhh.. she's my best friend."
That was..
.. acceptable.
Bell's shoulders relaxed as Aiz smiled despite herself. He really was too cute to stay mad at. It didn't help that he's looked like a kicked puppy for most of the day.
"Oho? Aiz? Is that true? Is that what you think of Bell?"
"Hm?" She wasn't expecting to get the same question.
Aiz shook her head vehemently, not even considering the thought. Her heart clenched when his face fell and she ignored the winces on the faces of those around them. With an affectionate rub of the head (one that he for once did not lean into at all), she spoke. "Bell ist mine future husband."
Silence.
All around the bonfire not a single soul spoke. What happened? Did she say something wrong? Riveria looked particularly unaffected by the whole muss so it couldn't have been that bad?
What had she said again?
'Bell ist mine future husband.'
Oh!
Shit!
Well, she supposed the secret could only last so long. Her whole familia had heard her accent now, there truly was going back! Unless..
Aiz gave off a light giggle, wiping a fake tear from her eye. She pointed a finger around the loose circle of adventurers as she grasped at her stomach, pretending it to be tight with laughter. Inwardly, she smirked at their gullibility. The fools.
"You should have seen all of your faces! Hah! What a good prank!"
There was a collective blink across all of their faces before they released a relieved (if not confused - since when did Aiz prank?) sigh.
Aiz frowned. Had they really been so concerned about her accent? She had hoped, deep in her heart of hearts, that these were the people she could trust with such a thing (Hephaestus smiths and Bell's company excluded). Had she been wrong?
Aki seemed to be the first to gather her nerves and pushed a weak smile to her lips. "You had us for a minute there, Aiz! I thought for sure you were marrying.. uhh.. him." She pointed vaguely towards Bell, not really knowing what his name was.
Aiz blinked before cocking her head to the side. "What?"
"Your.. prank? It was convincing. I thought you were planning on marrying the boy."
"I don't follow."
"You said he was your 'future husband.'"
A nod.
"He isn't. So, it was a good prank."
Aiz's brow furrowed. "That wasn't the prank."
Silence.
Golden eyes flitted about the once again shell-shocked circle in mild confusion. Why were they all being so weird?
"The prank was the accent? With the 'ist' and 'mine' and all?"
More silence.
She turned her head to face Bell, only to see him completely frozen with an empty spoon hovering just before his parted lips and a not insignificant stain on his shirt. She waved a hand in front of his face but he was completely out of it.
Was this some kind of magic?
A spatial or temporal freeze or something?
Her heart sunk as her eyes widened. Was she going to be sent forward in time again? She didn't think she could stomach it, not with the life she's built here. She still hasn't even rescued her mother! If she was sent forward again it would force Aria to go through so much more anguish, she couldn't let that happen and-
"Mew."
A pair of green, feline eyes stared up at her from her lap. Garbanzo Bean was once again on her hind legs with her forepaws pressed into Aiz's stomach in a position reminiscent of the day she adopted (read: plucked up off the street after a lengthy chase) the kit. She found her heart soothing as the little one gave off a few more 'mews.'
Whatever did she do to deserve such a wonderful daughter?
If Bean was able to move, Aiz gave it a fifty-fifty chance that this was an actual temporal spell. She didn't doubt that the little spitfire could break such a powerful incantation if it were to be enacted, but the fire was still crackling and the crystals above still twinkling and she was okay. She was safe.
Her hand automatically found itself slipping inside of Bell's free hand, rousing him from his strange slumber.
"Aiz?"
She hummed.
She seemed so nonchalant about the entire thing that Bell couldn't help but falter. His resolve to question her seemingly bizarre decision. He hadn't the faintest idea how they got engaged, but he'd be an idiot to say he was unhappy with the arrangement. He wasn't lying when he said she was his best friend, add onto that the fact that she was also beautiful and his hero and he had loved her since the first time they met, well- one doesn't need to know math to figure out that adds up.
Her familia, however, had no such reservations.
"You what!?"
Aiz tilted her head to the side in confusion before turning to face Bell in search of answers. He merely shrugged. Aiz let out a small snort before gesturing toward the remnants of his bread. "You going to eat that?"
Briefly, Aiz wondered if she was willing to devote her life to a man who didn't eat the crust of his bread, but the thought was quickly dismissed. She absolutely was.
More importantly, were they engaged now? Was that how it worked? Her parents' lessons on that matter were pretty much left at 'if anybody tosses an apple at thee, swat it away and aim for the genitals.' So, she couldn't really say she knew what to do after the proposal. She still didn't really think she was ready to be married, not yet at least, but that didn't mean Bell wasn't her future husband.
Regardless, the fact that he didn't eat his crust could be overlooked. Nobody is perfect. Besides, it should be hard for her to teach hi-
Aiz bit into the bread and immediately realized why he didn't eat his crust.
It tasted awful!
Gods above what is this!?
Bell was chortling beside her and she gave him a half-hearted scowl as she tossed the cursed thing as far as she could. She was absolutely not risking her little Bean getting ahold of that. She was a good mother. And like a good mother, she ignored her little kit's mewls of discontent as the crust sailed further and further over the horizon.
Bean fixed her with a ferocious glare, every bit the Warrior Queen Aiz knew her to be, but was quickly distracted by Bell's spoon as he brought it low for her. She sniffed at it before eyeing him warily, not fully trusting him after the stunt he pulled earlier.
It, however, was decisively not milk, so she should be okay.
"It is okay, little one." Bean glanced up to see her mother giving her a warm smile and she rubbed between the kitten's ears. "You deserve rest, you did a good job. I shall watch over the fool in your stead."
It was amusing to Bell how even while she covered her accent with one more befitting the city, the way she formed her sentences didn't change. Her verbs would switch in place and her sentences reorder to such a minor degree that nobody would think anything of it unless they knew the reason why.
It was cute.
She was cute.
Her eyes shut as she let out a massive yawn, Bean (unsurprisingly) wasted no time whirling around to glare at him as if he did something. Then, to make matters worse, Bean yawned too.
Naturally.
Because the world hated him.
He wasn't even sure how a kitten can both simultaneously yawn and scowl, but she managed it.
It was cute.
She was cute.
"Gah!"
She bit his finger! Whatever happened to her being his protector!?
Bell sucked on his index finger as Bean slowly retreated into Aiz's lap, glaring at him all the while. Soon enough, the kit had curled up between the warmth of the woman's thighs and sunk into a stew-driven hibernation. Aiz herself was quick to follow after, her arms wrapping around Bell's as she allowed her head to fall to his shoulder.
The white-haired boy let the world around him fall silent as he sat there.
Ultimately, it was a good choice, because everything was going to shit.
Riveria was pouring her mind into her healing magic, a beacon of green light shining through the faux night of the 'Under Resort' as she tried to resuscitate Lefiya.
Finn and Gareth were thoroughly drunk off their asses, merrily clinking their wooden mugs together as they sang a song that nobody else knew. Most of their unwilling audience were convinced the two didn't know either.
Tione was already planning the wedding, dragging a smiling Tiona around who seemed just happy to come along for the ride.
Aki was glaring at.. Raul? How odd.
Then, of course, there were the men. They hadn't yet seemed to reach a consensus on whether or not they should be glaring or weeping.
They settled for drunk.
Drunk was good.
At the very least, Finn and Gareth got a few backup singers for their singing troupe, not that they even noticed.
Somewhere, in the distance, a roar erupted from the entrance to the seventeenth floor. It went unheard as the merriment and.. unmerriment around the bonfire continued. The rescue party sent after the record holder could find their own way, they'd be alright.
".. and so help me if I even see you looking her- "
Bell tuned her out, preferring to let his mind wander and wonder. How did Hestia get her hair to be all floaty when she was angry? Was she using her arcanum? Was it considered an abuse of her power to do so if it did require her so-called 'godly might'?
Most importantly, where is Aiz and can she get him out of this already? He'd even accept a passionate attack from Bean if that's what it took. Hestia had been ranting for hours and not a good rant, like Aiz, where the words were fun to listen to and her face contorted in all of these cute little expressions. Hestia was just loud. And pitchy. And possessive. So possessive.
Honestly, whatever point she was trying to make was pretty much doomed for failure once she started to refer to him as 'hers.' He quite literally didn't get how she can't wrap her mind around how he isn't interested. He was quickly growing tired of sneaking out to be around Aiz just because Hestia would find some way of preventing it from happening. This was just another thing to add to the list.
Hestia decided to try out one of Aiz's favorite ranting techniques, the lateral pace, allowing him to finally let his eyes wander.
Oh, thank fuck.
His eyes caught sight of the girl on a branch at the edge of the campsite, her legs swinging back and forth idly as she waited. Garbanzo Bean was sitting in her palms which she held outstretched in front of her so that they could have a proper conversation, face to face. Judging by her hand gestures, she was mocking his goddess. Should he consider that a slight and defend Hestia's honor? Maybe. Was he going to? He felt like he was personally within his right not to fight the scary level six.
Just ignore his snickering and he's being perfectly reasonable.
".. and this Whallenwhatsit doesn't deserve y- are you laughing!?"
He sighed inwardly. "No, ma'am."
It didn't help that Lili was standing behind him ready to grab him if he tried to escape. All the while she nodded along in agreement as if it were gospel. Well, technically it is gospel, but the 'word of the gods' has lost a fair amount of credibility and reverence since their descent. Even more so for Bell since he met them.
"Good. Keep it that way. Now, where was I?"
"Hestia-sama was just telling Bell-sama why Whallenwhosit doesn't deserve him and how he can do better."
Great.
He attempted to pour all of his desperation into his eyes as he stared up through the leaves.
'Help me.'
Aiz was.. otherwise occupied. As it would turn out, Bean does not take insults to her mother's name lightly and was attempting to escape her mama's arms so she could pummel a goddess with every inch of her kitten-might. It was truly frightening, all like.. three pounds of her.
His.. future.. wife? Gah! That just felt weird to think. Made his spine all tingly. Aiz had already made it abundantly clear that he didn't need to defend her from his goddess, saying she would prefer he just let her tire herself out first. That didn't mean his skin wasn't crawling with anticipation as he thought of all different kinds of retorts. He didn't even know what half of them meant but one does not stay around the embodiment of 'Prim and Proper', Wrath and Fury without picking up a few things along the way.
The crystalline 'sun' had long since set and Bell was honestly waiting for some monster to come along and crush him into meat paste because that would be preferable to this. But, he would wait it out. Because he was patient.
Aiz? Aiz was.. not.
Neither Hestia nor Lili saw the blur of gold that shot out from the trees and plucked the white-haired boy from the ground. Only taken notice of the very much missing boy.
"Bell-kun?"
"Bell-sama!?"
Off in the distance, on the cliffside overlooking the rest of the eighteenth floor, Bell was gently deposited in the grass. "Thy familia ist.. long-winded."
Very diplomatic, Aiz, and not at all hypocritical.
He settled for a noncommittal hum.
Aiz plopped down in the grass to his left, her legs extended out in front of her so that just her feet hung over the edge. She patted the ground to her side and watched from the corner of her eye as he sat down. Bean scrambled down into the space between their legs, her eyes tracking Aiz's finger as it swung back and forth in front of her face. Occasionally, the kitten would swing a paw out to bat it away, when Bell gave her a glance Aiz merely shrugged. "Thy guard must be strong if thy heart is set on being foolish."
A silence passed after that, Aiz merely content to 'spar' with her daughter while Bell thought over what he needed to say.
Eventually (and she means eventually) he spoke.
"I'm.. sorry."
Aiz raised a brow but didn't comment past a hum. It certainly was a good start but not something that should have taken him ten minutes to come up with.
"I rush into danger without thinking about myself, I thought I should do it because it was what a hero would do, but.. "
"But, what?"
She spoke softly, not wanting to scare him, only encouraging him to speak his mind. Her attention was fully on him, her face turned to look directly at him as he stared out over the valley. The crystalline ceiling above cast a dim light over them, one that only those with the blessing of the gods could see through, but with the 'stars' sparkling overhead it really was quite the sight.
"I was being.. foolish."
"Aye. And?"
"I wasn't considering how it would make you or anybody else feel when I did things like that. When I rushed to the fifth floor before I was ready, when I ran into the dungeon at night, when I fought that Silverback alone at Monsterphilia- "
"Thou didst what?"
Bell blinked. "Uhhh.. "
Aiz poked him in the chest, "What did I say to thee? 'Get to cover, I will be back,' didst the meaning change in this city?"
".. no?"
"So?"
"The silverback was hunting my goddess, I couldn't just not help!"
Aiz smirked as he turned and faced away, one of her hands reaching up to card through his hair. Bean, ever on the same wavelength, climbed up to his shoulder and laid a paw on his cheek.
"Mew."
"Agreed, little one, mine future husband ist already a hero."
"Wha- !?"
Aiz clamped a hand over his mouth, shushing him with a finger over her lips. "Hush, Bell. Thy screams awakenest the ladybugs."
"What's so bad about the ladybugs?"
She shrugged. "I wouldst not know, nobody liveth to tell the tale."
"Oh."
".. "
".. "
".. "
".. "
".. then how do you know about them?"
"Hush, Bell."
"Okay."
"Mew."
Aiz nodded. "Aye, little one. He needeth to promise."
Bell turned his head to the right to look at the kitten staring at him from his shoulder before chancing a glance to his left to find Aiz giving the exact same look. "Uhh.. what am I promising?"
"Mew."
He licked his lips.
It felt like they were conspiring against him; is it still considered paranoia if it's a cat? Probably.
"I.. promise?"
Aiz leaned in closer, a soft smile gracing her lips as she did. Her eyes twinkled with joy as she took in his face, searching for any signs of deceit. "Doth thou truly mean it?"
He glanced over to Bean trying to find any amount of support. All he got was an equally eager tan kitten licking her lips. Bell sighed, he was probably going to regret this.
With clenched eyes, he breathed out one final breath before nodding. "Yes."
Aiz squealed and wrapped him in a tight embrace, nearly tackling the both of them off the cliff in her excitement. Bell hit the ground with a muffled 'umph!' as Bean scrambled around for a better foothold, a foothold that just so happened to include two hind paws in his lower lip and another deep in his nostril.
"Wath ith happenin'?"
His only answer was a 'mew' as Aiz squeezed him tighter, her chin resting on his chest as she smiled up toward his face gratefully. "I thank thee verily, Bell, foolish, foolish, Cranel."
He couldn't help but think that was a dig on him for agreeing to.. whatever it was she just tricked him into and not his earlier mistakes. He would've preferred she just called him stupid.
Bonus:
Bell and Aiz were walking side by side on their way back to the Loki familia camp sight, a contented Bean slumbering cradled in her mother's arms. One of her little baby paws with Garbanzo Bean's little toe beans was dangling off the side of the woman's forearm.
It was peaceful. There was no reason to disrupt it.
".. "
".. "
".. "
".. "
But Bell really had to know.
"Aiz?"
"Hm."
"How did Bean make it all the way down here alone?"
"She needeth not explain her ways to us. Bean isn't a being unlike any other."
Bell nodded, pacified, that was as good of an explanation as he could hope for.
Bean was Bean. That is all that needs to be known.
As if to further sell the point, the kit spun around in Aiz's arms and stretched much to her mother's delight. Aiz cooed as Bean's chest puffed out and her forepaws extended up into the air, her little claws coming out before disappearing.
Adorable.
Author Notes:
Don't tell anybody, but I wrote this (and more) at work today. Whoops.
