Ok, I'm blowing pretty quickly through early childhood now. Of course, I'll try not to rush too much so I can introduce everything I need to but it'll be pretty fast-paced until we actually get somewhere.
Please review!
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My dad died about four months before my second birthday.
We found out about a week afterwards and even then, his body was never recovered.
It could've happened to anyone, we were told.
Mum grieved for months.
"A mission gone wrong," was all she would tell me. It wasn't until much later that I would find out that his team ran into some dangerous missing-nin, unprepared, outmatched.
Yeah, it could've happened to anyone. I didn't care about that though. It could've happened to anyone but it happened to him.
Mum withdrew into herself.
"She had lost her parents in the war", some distant great aunt had muttered at the funeral, unaware that the child held in a cousin's arms nearby could hear every word. "She had lost her sister on a mission too. She lost her friends in the Kyuubi attack. And now, her husband. The poor girl."
"Mm, the poor child'll never really know her father either," someone else replied softly. I watched my second mother up ahead, her face set in a solemn, sorrowful gaze, and felt something deep down ache.
I had loved my second father in the end. I would remember him. Always.
But I would never be able to love him as much as she did.
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I got a more accurate indication of exactly where I sat in the timeline on my second birthday.
Mum didn't organise my party that year. I didn't expect her to. Hell, I was just relieved that she came. I was no psychologist, not in this life or the last. I didn't know whether this was a sign of healing or running. I was just happy it wasn't a sign of hurting.
I was never sure if I could love my second parents like I loved my first, but I had long since decided that, even if I couldn't love them as much, I could still love them. Reincarnation guilt was a weird thing and separate (but somehow not) from survivor's guilt.
While Mum sat in the corner, quietly talking with some other adults, I took shelter behind the stack of bean bags in the corner. It wasn't a gathering of friends, after all, so much as all my cousins decided to invade our house with their incessant shrieking and seemingly endless saliva. How can all of their hands be sticky and grubby? The food hadn't even been served yet!
Also, I have so many cousins. So freakin' many. I could start an Uchiha cult with just my cousin. Hell, I could raise a tiny, sticky, grubby Uchiha army with just my cousins. We could rule the world.
If only I could do it without getting near them. They also all looked the same. I'd done a quick scan for Sasuke already, since he should've been around my age anyway, but even if he was there, I wouldn't have been able to tell. Moreover, I had no clue how important my family was. Were we big enough to invite the son of the Clan Head for a playdate? I'd been alive for 2 years now and I hadn't even seen him. He most certainly wasn't at this party. Probably would've killed the mood anyway.
Anyway, I was crouching behind the bean bags, blocking out the sounds of coagulating infants, when the name slipped through my defences.
"... Itachi, wasn't it?"
My head snapped around so fast that I think I pulled a muscle but I pushed the discomfort way down as I zeroed in on a conversation between two Uchiha mothers nearby.
"Yes, the genius heir. I hear he's entered the academy. He's starting rather young."
"Well, he's always been a prodigious son. Fugaku must be proud. And their second son? His birthday is coming soon, right?"
"Oh, not for another few months. It's a shame Fugaku never holds gatherings for his sons' birthdays. It would be a fantastic opportunity if we got invited."
I tuned out immediately. I didn't need to hear the whimsical exchange of the political aims of some opportunistic old ladies. I had work to do.
If Itachi was just entering the academy around now, then there's still time before the massacre. Maybe a couple of years at least. I knew it was after Sasuke entered the academy, so in theory, it would be after I enter the academy. Beyond that, I was pretty vague on certain details. And I sure as hell didn't remember exact dates.
Wait, Itachi was 13 when he killed his clan. Shit, how much older was Itachi than Sasuke? I was missing things. Pieces. Fragments of the story. I also needed to write everything I remember down before it all goes away.
My thoughts were cut off by a huge yawn which left my jaw aching slightly. Mum, like the experienced mother hawk she was, snapped her gaze to me immediately before smiling softly at the other mothers.
"It's seems that it's getting a bit late. The children's bedtimes must be soon, yes?" She announced, sweeping to her feet and moving towards me. I didn't protest as she scooped me up, resisting the urge to rub my little baby temples in frustration. This entire world was giving me a cosmos-sized headache.
It was pretty amazing how quickly mum gathered up the rest of the children, depositing them into their respective parent's arms and ushering them all out the door. I gurgled happily as the door slammed shut behind them and applauded with all the grace of an excited seal.
Mum breathed out slowly and chuckled at me. "Thanks for the excuse, little dragon. I thought I'd never be rid of those stuffy old ladies."
I snorted and rolled onto my back, still clapping my chubby little hands.
Eventually, she walked me to bed, taking the time to gently tuck me in. "Two whole years," she murmured teasingly to me. "You're getting old."
"Am not!" I yelped, playing the part of a child.
It was never her fault that I wasn't a child. She didn't need to know her child wasn't her own so I'd decided that I would play the part until the end.
"Oh how I wish these Uchiha genes weren't so strong," she muttered, talking more to herself than me now. "You take after me far too much. Perhaps you might've had more to remember your father by if you didn't."
She leaned forward, pressing her lips against my forehead. "Good night, little dragon."
I kept my eyes shut as she rose and drifted out of the room. My teeth ached as I clenched my jaw.
I didn't have long left.
I still needed to make her proud before I went.
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It was two months later when I met Natsumi.
It was a part of mum's recovery. I was convinced that staying cooped up in the house was not good for her, either physically, mentally, emotionally, etcetera, but she wouldn't do it for her so I tricked her into doing it for me.
Basically, I made her walk me to and from the park everyday. Most of the time, she sat quietly to the side, breathing the fresh air and alternating between watching me and watching the clouds (pity she wasn't a Nara, she'd have probably been very good at it and she wouldn't even have to die). But on good days, I could see her talking with other parents and passing acquaintances.
In hindsight, she probably knew what I was doing. I could never trick her. The simple fact that she never protested or refused spoke volumes, whether about her personality or strength I didn't know, but it was probably a good sign.
It was on one of these trips that I was draped across the top of some monkey bars like a lazy sloth, waiting for the sun to set a bit more.
Like I said, I went to the park mainly for mum's benefit. I still had a twenty year head start and while I remained childish in some ways, I had long outgrown playgrounds. Still, this was a good day for mum. She sat in a small group of women, chatting and smiling. So, whenever she glanced at me inquiringly (are you bored? Want to go home?), I beamed and shook my head (no, I'm not done here yet) and she would return to her conversation.
I was counting blades of grass when a something sharply jabbed me in the ribs through the bars. It hurt and it caught me by surprise. I yelped like a kicked puppy and twisted away from whatever it was, briefly forgetting exactly where I was.
Suddenly, I was on my back in the grass, groaning in pain. "Whyyyyy?" I moaned, blocking out the sun from my eyes with an arm.
Loud snorts of laughter alerted me to the presence of another brat and I shot upright. A girl came into view, all strawberry blonde curls and rosy cheeks, rolling about, clutching her stomach and laughing rather hysterically at my suffering.
I scowled.
"You should see your-" the girl cackled, pointing at me rather rudely. I cut her off when I let out a war cry and tackled her.
It was a good day for my mother but it wasn't quite so for me. That didn't stop me feeling bad later on.
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The crazy brat wasn't there the next day, or the day after that. It wasn't until three days later that I rocked up to the park and noticed her strawberry blonde curls bouncing around on the grass.
The moment I saw her, I veered sharply, attempting to skirt around her and make for the trees but she saw me instantly. I blanched and frantically looked around for a hiding place. Whoever she was, she fought hard and dirty and I still have freakin' claw marks on my legs for gods sake, I don't wanna do it again.
There wasn't enough time to hide though since she immediately headed straight for me. Huh, I never noticed that she had bright red eyes. I thought that'd be something I'd have noticed, you know, considering we were wrestling each other last time.
I whimpered and threw myself to the ground just as she reached me, my arms thrown defensively over my head. Yes, I had no shame, ok, claw marks.
We stayed like that for a moment or two until small fingers prodded at my head curiously. I slowly peeked up, ready to duck back down again in case of a surprise attack. She now sat about a metre away, grinning widely.
"Hi," she said.
"Uhh," I replied smartly.
"I'm Natsumi," she announced, like she was presenting some sort of prize. "How about you?"
I frowned suspiciously. "Kaida."
"I like you, Kaida," she suddenly remarked. "You're not like the other idiots around here."
"Thank... you?" I responded slowly, gradually lowering my arms and sitting up.
"We're going to be friends."
Ok, I'm not an expert on social interaction or anything, but I don't think this conversation was flowing quite like it was supposed to. Still, this was better than the wrestling so I didn't protest.
"We are?" I seemed to have temporarily misplaced my brain cells in the confusion and terror.
She shot me a threatening glare and I backtracked.
"I-I mean, we are!" I exclaimed, avoiding eye contact.
"Great!" She beamed, leaping to her feet. She didn't seemed bothered when I flinched at the sudden movement, instead dragging me to my feet and pulling me off to the side. "You should come to my birthday party. It's on the twenty-first, in a week. You can meet my sister. She's great."
"Wow, Natsumi, meeting the family already, this is moving so fast," I joked awkwardly. She stared blankly at me in response and I began to panic internally.
"Call me Natsu," she commanded.
"Natsu!" I squeaked, caught by surprise at her forcefulness. She beamed.
"That's it! My name is Noguchi Natsumi, but you're my friend so you should call me Natsu," she explained.
Well, it made sense, I supposed. Maybe a bit aggressive, but she didn't seem so bad now that she wasn't trying to rip my face off.
"I should go home and tell my sister I made a friend then," Natsu decided. I was quickly learning that Natsumi was someone who pulled along at her speed, without pause, without mercy. She'd probably thrive in this world as long as she could survive it.
"O-Ok." I nodded but she was already moving. "See you later then."
She left me dumbfounded beside the playground, wondering what the hell just happened here.
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I didn't end up going to Natsu's birthday party. I'd gotten right up to the door but all she said that there was some issues with her father so she decided not to. I didn't get to say anything before she shut the door again. I thought I heard the faint sound of shattering glass behind me as I walked back down the street but I couldn't be sure.
"Everybody has something," Mum murmured to me that night as she tucked me in. "If she is your friend, you don't need to know what that something is. You just need to be there for her."
I saw Natsu at the park two days later and hugged her. I didn't really know her. We'd only met two times, one of which we mostly just tried to dismantle each other.
She responded by planting a solid fist in my gut.
I learnt that Natsu doesn't like hugs that day.
I also learnt that everyone has something, but some of them have had it for a long time. People like Natsu have learned to deal with it and it couldn't break them anymore.
I wanted to be unbreakable too.
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Ok, probably not my best work but it's, uh, something...
Anyway, read, review, if you give me feedback, I will love you forever.
Until next time,
- Dragon
