Yayayayayayayay REVIEWS! ~(0)~
I haveth reviews! I got ridiculously excited about having review and follows and favourites, oh my! To those who reviewed, thanks so much! (I got all giggly over compliments...)
TheChucklingFox - That's good, I'm glad you're enjoying it so far! That is why I write ;3 Also thanks even more, you were my first reviewer!
aspire5515 - Thank you~! It's good to see you're genuinely reviewing my story! Like I said, feedback is so very needed.
Anyway, on with the story~ (Also, wow, I totally overuse exclamation marks when I'm happy...)
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It's weird, being able to walk around and knowing that you're going to die. Moreover, knowing exactly who will kill you and how and why and not really being able to get angry over it.
And it's even weirder when that person is a celebrated prodigy, heir of your clan who is constantly gossiped and bragged about by all of your neighbours.
On the bright side, it became much easier for me to keep a track of him and roughly where I am in the timeline. But it also meant I was constantly reminded of my impending doom.
For instance, August 19th, four months after my second birthday, I headed outside to check the mail for mother. I made it about three steps out the front door before I heard two of my neighbours gossiping about how Itachi is apparently excelling in school and will be graduating soon.
I, being the graceful swan that I am, immediately missed a step, flailed in panic, let out a surprisingly inhuman noise somewhere between a shocked squeak and a surprised gurgle and face-planted on the grass, completely caught off guard (it was fucking 6am in the morning, I was not prepared to deal with this).
The neighbours paused at the sound and looked over to find me already sitting up and seemingly doing complex maths on my fingers, cross-legged on my front lawn.
What the heck?! Didn't he start this year?! Freakin' geniuses and their freakin' murder-y genius brains and geez, stupid ninja village with stupid ninja rules and stupid murder-y murder and-
"What are you doing?" I paused and swivelled to see Mum in the doorway, all raised-eyebrows and hands-on-hips motherly style. The neighbours were gone, probably run away in case I was contagious or something.
"I fell," I deadpanned.
I counted thirty-seven seconds of prolonged eye contact before she just sighed, muttered, "my kid is so weird..." and disappeared inside again. I gave an indignant huff, but not too indignant 'cause fuck it, she's not wrong.
I made my way to the mailbox just as two of my Mum's friends were walking by.
"... passed the graduation exam already!"
"Truly! Ah, the Clan Head must be so proud, his son really is a model Uchi-uh..."
"I know, that boy is a genius! Oh, if only my Itsuki were so- Oh! Kaida, honey, what on earth are you doing?!"
I paused.
"... Contemplating the fact that all life is meaningless and that our every achievement and every breath is only a part of the downward spiral we call our existence and that none of us can ever truly escape time so death will always claim us in the end."
"Sweetie, you're hitting your head against a mailbox, do you want me to call your mother?"
"... Yes please."
~{}~{}~{}~{}~{}~
Three years passed quickly. I made it to five years old and four months. I kept up with my training, ready to knock 'em dead with my awesome skills at the Academy. Mum would be so proud. I also managed to figure out that I have a little under three years to go before I die.
Yeah.
My life (and death) sucks.
I'm kind of proud though. I managed to avoid all the major characters for five years but not Kushina but alas, my luck was not to last.
I'd stayed friends with Natsu since we'd met. She was still so, so aggressive but I'd kind of gotten used to it. She'd gotten used to me and my flighty weirdness in return. And thus a beautiful friendship was born~!
But not right now. Right now, I wanted to throttle her.
We were playing tag and she was it. I was not watching where I was going. Needless to say, I collided with someone, went down and took them down with me. The world was spinning by the time I came to my senses.
"Oh, man," I groaned, propping myself up so I wasn't crushing the kid. "Sorry 'bout-"
I saw exactly who I'd landed on and I stopped. I stared. I cursed a lot in my head. I even mentally cussed out Natsu who seemed to have mysteriously, conveniently disappeared.
Of course. Of course, after five years of good luck and avoiding any real signs of trouble, I'd go and crash into Uchiha Sasuke himself. Because when I screw up, I go big!
As if that wasn't the worst part, oh no. No, because my stupid brain, as also, didn't focus on the actual important fact here that I'd run into Uchiha Sasuke (stop saying his full name, Kaida). Instead what came out was something along the lines of:
"Wow, it really does look like a duck's butt..."
Moment of stunned silence.
"What?!" Huh. Sasuke looked mad.
I felt my face light up like a christmas tree in embarrassment as my head kicked into hyperdrive.
On the subject of christmas trees, they don't have Christmas here, did you know? How could they not have Christmas? No wonder they're all psychopathic killers, they don't know the pure, unadulterated joy of waking up on Christmas morning as a child and running downstairs because you know that some magical guy broke into your house last night to give you free shit! Maybe I should start a new tradition, I could totally get mum and Natsu in on it, maybe some of the neighb-
Focus Kaida, focus!
Sasuke didn't look mad anymore. Sasuke looked weirded out and I realised that, not only did I say that duck butt comment out loud earlier, I'd then proceeded to mutter creepily to myself under my breath about Christmas and psychopathic killers and and free shit. I'm very surprised he hasn't just left yet.
I needed a sock that I could just shove in my mouth in emergencies like this because apparently fear loosens my tongue and he's still staring at me, oh god, I've just been staring like a startled deer at him for the past five minutes without saying a word, Kaida, you idiot, say something! And where is Natsu?!
"S-Sorry!" I squeaked.
"Get off me!" He snarled.
Ohhhh, that's why he didn't leave. I was still sprawled out on top of him like an awkward, talking pancake. I made an odd sort of keening sound, like a tortured whale, and scrambled off him. I proceeded to leap to my feet and shuffle on the spot nearby, wondering if this is how chihuahuas felt all the time and was that why they were always trembling?
Sasuke scrunched up his face as he climbed to his feet and I found myself panicking as to whether it was in disgust or in pain. I darted forward once Sasuke was on his feet and began examining him for any injuries.
"Did I hurt you? Are you injured? Oh geez, did I break you?" I flittered around him, mentally cursing the world. "I didn't break you, did I? Tell me I didn't break you, I'll give you a tomato or something, you like those right? Just say I didn't break you! Oh no, I can't have broken the son of the Clan Head, I'll be skinned! And I don't want to be skinned! I very much like my skin where it is, thank you! Oh wait, is that where the saying 'saved my skin' came from, it's very accu-"
"Shut up, you freak!" He yelled. I instantly came to a halt in front of him, as stiff and straight as a soldier.
"Like a weakling like you could hurt me anyway," he snapped, dusting himself off. Ouch. Wow, he looked super threatening for a five year old, really, Uchiha are pretty scary. It was just a genetic talent of theirs I guess.
Oh wait. I'm an Uchiha.
"Oi, how'd you know I like tomatoes?" Sasuke frowned suspiciously at her. Alarms went off in her head.
Goddamn it, Kaida, you're making things WORSE JUST SHUT U-
"Lucky guess!" I exclaimed, awkwardly chuckling as my eyes frantically scanned the area for an escape route. "Hahaha... haha.. ha.. ha..."
Kill me. Just end it now.
This was officially deemed the worst day of my life when a familiar face flickered into view.
"Sasuke, are you ok?" Uchiha freakin' Itachi asked. His voice was softer than I'd thought it'd be and those stress lines were much fainter. I gulped.
Sasuke immediately scowled deeper at me, probably for decreasing his cool factor at all in front of his adored older brother.
I didn't care. I was too busy staring in a combination of awe and horror at my future murderer. Was I crying? No? I wanted to...
Itachi fixed his eyes on me - not red, not spinning, not yet - and smiled. "And who might this be?"
"A freak," Sasuke grumbled.
"No one," I blurted out.
To his credit, Itachi didn't falter at the situation, just kept on smiling. That smooth son of a bitch.
"Are you Sasuke's friend?"
"Hell no!" Sasuke gaped. I didn't answer, feeling that Sasuke's response was pretty sufficient on my behalf.
"How unfortunate," Itachi's smile dipped a bit, not enough that any normal kid would notice but I was watching his every movement like a hawk. My entire body, my every sense was tight and on edge. "I've been encouraging my little brother to play more with kids his own age but he hasn't seemed to be able to make any friends. Say, would you mind playing with him?"
"Onii-san!" Sasuke whined, tugging on his brother's pants. Itachi didn't budge.
No, no, no, nonononono-
"Ok."
Sasuke's jaw dropped and he glared at me. I gulped.
What? You try saying no to your future murderer! Uchiha Itachi was going to kill me and he could make it hurt. I'd rather Sasuke's brooding over Itachi's wrath.
Itachi's smile brightened once more and he gently nudged Sasuke forwards. "Great. I'll be back in about an hour, otouto. Have fun until then."
Itachi flickered away and Sasuke and I were left in awkward silence.
The brat couldn't make killing intent just yet but he was making a valiant effort.
"Hehe..." I edged away. "Uh, how about we play tag? You can be it and I can... RUN!"
I booked it, screaming my head off as Sasuke shouted and gave chase, hands outstretched as though he were trying to strangle me.
Mum, thankfully, didn't say anything when I dragged my tired, sweaty self through the door that night and collapsed on the floor.
"I... hate... ducks..."
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I found Natsu the next day, sniggering at me.
"Natsu..."
"Oh! Hi friend! I was just taking a stroll and-"
"I'm going to kill you..."
"Heh. Bring it short-stuff."
She won. (She's the devil) I vowed revenge.
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My first year at the Academy started shortly after my 6th birthday.
With my luck, I wasn't even surprised that I was in the same class as the Rookie 9. It was practically inevitable at this point.
I was one of the first to arrive and chose a nice, safe seat up the back, in the middle. Out of the way enough that I'm sure if I kept my head down and my existence uninteresting then no one would talk to me. Right?
Haha. Wrong!
I wasn't sitting there for more than five minutes, doodling in the back of one of my books to pass the time, when I faintly registered the sound of someone sitting down next to me.
Probably no one, just some background character or something. I snuck a peek anyway and did a double-take accompanied with a strangled squeal of terror.
Five minutes. Five minutes was all it took for me to accidentally meet Shikamaru.
I can't even move seats! I mean, won't that be, like, super offensive? I hate interacting with main characters but I sure as hell don't want to make enemies of one!
Oh shit, I blanched. What if I'm in Chouji's seat? What if I get in the way of their beautiful life-saving friendship?! WHAT IF I BREAK UP SHIKAMARU AND CHOUJI?!
Breathe Kaida, breathe.
It'll be ok. I'll just switch seats tomorrow, no biggie. Besides, Shikamaru's pretty chill. He won't care too much. Right? Right?
Having calmed down a bit, I returned to my doodling.
Ten minutes later, Chouji sits down on my other side. I start screaming in my head.
"Hi," he smiled (so warm and fuzzy and goddamn it!) at me, "I'm Chouji. What's your name?"
I looked at him with a blank expression for at least a solid minute before replying. "Kaida."
"Nice to meet you, Kaida," Chouji replied. Shikamaru, probably disturbed from his nap, squinted one eye at us before deeming it not worth his time and going back to sleep.
Yeah, sure, you have a nice nap, jackass, I'm just gonna hyperventilate over here but you, you get your beauty sleep.
Thankfully, Chouji seemed satisfied for the moment and busied himself with unpacking his books and stationary for class. I sighed in relief and glanced away just in time to lock eyes with Sasuke, entering the classroom. There was a moment of panic on my end before he scowls heavily, sticks his nose up and makes his way to literally the furthest seat from mine.
I whimpered and proceeded to stubbornly stare at my hands in my lap until class started.
Oh, but that wasn't the end. I heard our teacher start to introduce himself and looked up, ready to start learning, only to realise that the majority of the bottom half of the board is completely blocked.
Kiba sat in front of me. Akamaru sat on Kiba's head. I now have to ask Kiba to place Akamaru elsewhere or resign myself to only seeing half of the notes on the board. I was tempted by the first option, I really was...
I gulped and leaned forward to tap Kiba on the shoulder. The first time, I do it so softly that it barely rustles his clothes. The second time though, he twitched and turned to face me.
"What?"
I froze.
He frowned, befuddled. Heh, befuddled. Funny word.
"What?" He repeated more forcefully. I jolted into action.
"U-uh, I-I-I c-can't see the b-board," I stammered.
"What?" He blinks, obviously wondering why I'm telling him this.
"Your d-dog is i-in the way." I pressed onwards.
He blinked and shrugged. "Oh. Sorry."
That should have been the end of it but I think we've established that my brain immediately disconnects from my mouth in the face of danger.
"Th-thanks. Y-You know, your d-dog is super c-cute. You l-look just l-like him."
I need to remember to buy a goddamn sock. No, Kaida, you just need to STOP DOING THIS TO YOURSELF!
Kiba took a moment to run what I had just said through his head while mortification slowly spread across my face. He growled.
"Did you just say I looked like a dog?"
"N-No!" I exclaimed, far too loudly.
"What the hell?!" Kiba snapped.
"Kiba! Kaida!" Sensei called. "Keep talking during my class and you will no longer be in my class. Understood?"
"She just-" Kiba protested.
"Understood?" Sensei repeated.
"Yes, sensei," Kiba grouched, slumping in his chair. But not before sending me a glare. He never moved Akamaru either.
I shrank down in my own chair. One day. One day, I would stop doing that.
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After school was just as rough.
I had managed to scribble down any notes from the board I'd missed from Chouji's book, the angel, and fled the building before Kiba could catch me.
That was when I noticed a certain chibi blonde swinging sadly on a swing nearby.
I nearly screamed. No, no, nononono. Nope. No. Not gonna happen. Keep walking, Kaida. That right there? That is a little malevolent ball of plot and bad luck just waiting to hatch. I don't care how sad he looks. Keep. Walking.
I jerked my head forward, watching him vanish from the corner of my eye. That's it, keep walking, don't stop, keep wa- What's that?
I paused. There was something huddled behind a tree nearby, like a small animal or something?
I found myself drifting over to it. It moved a bit and I squinted. It was actually kind of big for an animal, maybe it was a ninj-
Nope. I stopped next to 'it' and stared. Not an animal. Definitely not an animal. (Just as cute though.)
It was a little Hinata. And she was turning bright red, staring back at me with teary, embarrassed eyes. Trembling too.
What was a tiny Hinata doing behind a tree?
I slowly looked at Naruto, swinging sadly on his swing. Then back at her, hiding behind a tree.
Then back at Naruto. Then back at her. Naruto. Her. Naruto. Her.
Naruto.
Her.
Oh. Oh.
I blinked and slowly grinned. Hinata squeaked at my expression and scuttled back. She then quickly realised that she'd left the safe cover of the tree and scuttled right back again.
I resisted the urge to snort.
Slowly, I waved at her. She turned even redder. Then I pointed at Naruto, gave her a thumbs up and kept walking.
She looked like she wanted the ground itself to just swallow her whole but settled for making a low, whining sound and hiding her face behind her hands.
I laughed the moment I was out of earshot.
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It was a few streets over and I was nearly home when I turned the corner and found three boys from my class a few metres away.
Oh hey, there's Chouji, I wonder where Shi- Oh no.
I paled.
No.
But-
No.
But they're bullying him!
Not your problem.
But it's not right!
There is a plot!
He looks so sad.
A way things have to go!
He's too cute to be bullied...
You will mess everything up!
And he leant us his notes after class...
Stop it! Keep walking!
That's right.
I couldn't get involved.
If anything, I'd make him sadder when I inevitably died.
Besides, I see Shikamaru walking down the street now. I'm sure he'll save him.
But he's awfully far away...
Leave. Now.
I was turning to go back the way I came, mapping out an alternate route in my head, when one of the boys reached out and shoved Chouji. His bag of snacks felt to the ground and I felt my resolve snap in half.
"I hate having a conscience," I grumbled, shooting across the street and tapping on the shoulder of the boy who pushed him.
The moment he'd faced me, getting ready to sneer something at me, I punched him. In the face. With my hand.
"Ow, son of a-" I yelled at the same time as the kid. I shook my hand in pain and bit my lip. Shit, the movies never tell how much that fucking hurts!
The other boy glanced over in shock to find his friend on the ground, clutching his nose.
"I hope it's broken!" I hissed, grabbing Chouji's hand and making a run for it. Thinking ahead, I grabbed Shikamaru's hand as I ran past too, taking him along for for the ride.
"Vive la révolution!" I shouted, leaving the bullies far behind.
Natsu is such a bad influence.
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The next day, I didn't sit in the same seat as before. I sat in the seat four seats to the left of that one.
Ha, I'm a genius.
See, now Shikamaru and Chouji can sit next to each other and Kiba will be far away enough that we'll never clash in class again. I'm still in the back row, in a position to avoid attention. Hopefully Shikamaru and Chouji won't take it personally, and might even assume I just did it to avoid Kiba after yesterday! I even avoided potential bonding by introducing them last night once we'd stopped running, and then abruptly making a run for it. I went straight home after that. Now, I just need to not screw things up again and my peaceful school days can be salvaged.
Haha. Wrong!
I watched in despair as Shikamaru sat in the seat to my right and Chouji, beaming happily at her like the little rainbow muffin he was, squeezed past to sit on my left.
Shikamaru shot me an odd look and Chouji looked adorably confused as I let out a soft sob and dropped my head onto the table.
Sensei paused a few minutes into the lessons to scowl at me. "Uchiha Kaida, stop banging your head into the table, you're disrupting the rest of the class!"
"Yes Sensei..."
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Ok, so this was kind of like a semi-filler chapter but kind of not...? Like, obviously nothing super serious happened but I think it was pretty important to see how Kaida meets half of the characters, how she interacts with them and how she deals with interacting with them. So, semi-filler. Also, this ended up wayyyy longer than I thought it'd be but I'm pretty eager to get onto the good stuff soo...
Anyway, hang tight. This was a more upbeat chapter but the next chapter, well, shit's probably gonna start going down.
Please, keep those reviews coming~
Until next time!
- Dragon
