The next morning I woke up in bed alone, but with a start. I quickly got out of bed and dressed in clothes appropriate for traveling to Kings Cross and work. Once in my tight blue jeans and Aztec printed knit sweater, I pulled my black, knee-high leather boots on and marched out of the bedroom. In the kitchen, I could hear someone making breakfast. The sizzling of grease in a frying pan and smell of burning bacon overwhelmed my senses. Gabriel must be in the kitchen. He was the only one in the house who liked their bacon charred.
I couldn't help but smile when I turned into the kitchen to see Gabriel standing in front of the stove only in a pair of blue jeans. He had a white tee shirt thrown over his shoulder. He leaned forward to flip this bacon in the sizzling pan and stood up abruptly straight as I approached him. I had no doubt that he could sense me moving slowly towards him. He turned to me with a glowing smile on his aged face.
"Good morning, Cadence," he said cheerfully.
"What has you in such a good mood this morning?"
"I woke up next to the most beautiful woman in the world—"
"Alright," I smirked as I stood on my toes and kissed his cheek in greeting. "You can stop sugar coating everything…what's wrong?"
"That obvious?"
"You never sugar coat anything, Gabriel," I said while he studied me with dark velvety eyes. I reached around him to pull the frying pan off the heat, then turned off the stove. I looked up at him with raised eyebrows. "When did you get home last night?"
"Two hours ago," he shrugged. "Still haven't made it to bed."
I nodded slowly. "What kept you out so late?"
"After I spoke to Dumbledore, I did some digging to find validity to Haiden's story."
"I can only imagine the look on Scrimgeour's face when he finds out that his Head of Magical Law Enforcement was creeping around the city investigating a schizophrenic seer's story."
Gabriel gave me a cross look for my cheeky comment. I bit my bottom lip as I smirked up at him. His harsh expression softened, then he leaned forward and kissed me delicately on the lips. My hands gracefully lingered on his naked chest, absorbing the body heat off his smooth skin while we continued to gently exchange kisses.
"What did Dumbledore say and what did you find?" I whispered as he nuzzled his mouth against my neck while wrapping me tightly in his arms.
"He thinks that Haiden is being genuine, but we should still be cautious. He was the one who thought it best to track down evidence that proves her story."
I pulled away from Gabriel and looked at him with curious eyes. "You found evidence that she is indeed in control of her body? That she has overruled Divinity and left Voldemort?"
"Well, Carrigan confirmed that she left Voldemort for us," Gabriel said as he turned his attention back to the stove. He moved his bacon onto a plate before attending to the other pans on the stove where eggs and pancakes were cooking. I watched with pleasure as he effortlessly cooked breakfast. He was doing so many things at once, it was hard to believe that he only had two hands.
"No," I whispered. "Carrigan confirmed that Haiden left her behind in Voldemort's basement—that only proves that Haiden is a coward and someone who we can't rely on."
Gabriel placed the hot food on a large serving platter, with the bacon, before turning to look at me with serious eyes. "Why are you so quick to dismiss her?"
"Why aren't you?" I questioned sharply. "You were so paranoid that Penelope was out to get us—and you were right! I thought we all learned our lesson then!"
"I never trusted Penny. You did. You have to trust your instincts, Cadence. If they are telling you to not trust Haiden then that is what you should do."
"What are your instincts telling you?"
"As much as I want to trust her, we can't," he said somberly as he began to pull clean dishes for breakfast out of the top cabinet over the counter. "She was in Voldemort's grasp for too long to break free of him so easily. Even if she is genuine and thinks she is in control, I fear that her other personalities are alive deep within her, waiting for the proper moment to regain control. What if that was Voldemort's plan all along? He told Divinity to relinquish control to Haiden….He wants Haiden to truly believe that she is in control so that we will believe it. Then, once we have taken Haiden into our inner circle, Divinity will strike, taking back control and destroying the Order from the inside out."
Gabriel fell silent and his last words loomed in the air around me, haunting me to my core. I could only stare up at him; part of me thought that it was an absolutely ridiculous theory, but at the same time it might be crazy enough to be true. If anyone knew what Voldemort was capable of, it was Gabriel. Manipulation and well-thought plans that took a long period to execute were right up my father's alley.
"Did you tell Dumbledore this?"
"Yes," Gabriel whispered sadly. "He considered it for a few moments but thought that if there is such a plot we would have gotten some wind of it by now."
I nodded my head slowly. "I think that we should keep our distance from her, to protect ourselves and the Order."
"What if we're wrong?" Gabriel asked. "What if she truly is innocent now? What if Divinity doesn't exist anymore?"
"That's not possible."
Gabriel and I both turned our attention to the entrance of the kitchen, where the comment had originated. Carrigan was standing in the doorframe, dressed in yoga pants and a thin long sleeve shirt. She must have just returned from a jog. My side pinched at the thought of her running by herself.
"I didn't go by myself," she said softly as her navy blue eyes peered at me. "Benjamin just went upstairs to shower before we leave for the train station."
"I thought you had control of your telekinesis now," Gabriel said.
"I do," Carrigan said as she turned her eyes to him. "I just don't want Mom to worry about me. You should worry about Divinity, though."
"Why?" Gabriel crossed his arms over his naked chest.
"Because, she will always be an entity of Haiden," Carrigan stepped into the kitchen. There was a stern tone in her voice that sent chills through my body. "Divinity and Persephone, even if they are separate identities of Haiden, are still a part of her. Muggle doctors say she is schizophrenic, that her other identities are simply voices in her head, her own made up delusions, but the fact is that they do exist within her. Haiden's soul has been torn apart into three pieces. When the soul was pulled apart it fulfilled the identities that were placed onto it—Persephone, the Seer because of who Braven Drake was. Voldemort created the idea of Haiden's mother being a powerful goddess and fed it to her, causing Persephone to believe that she also was a force of nature; Divinity, the Death Eater, was created to satisfy the social expectations of a witch in our society and to be a dedicated follower of Voldemort—"
"But if Haiden still remains, why isn't it possible for her to take control of the other souls within her?"
"I'm not saying she can't," Carrigan answered my question. "I'm saying that Divinity will always exist. If Haiden stays on these Muggle drugs they will only suppress her other identities. And I'm sure it is only a matter of time before Divinity or Voldemort figures out a way to counteract the drugs."
"What are you basing all of this on?"
"Haiden was in that house with me, Gabriel," Carrigan said sharply. "She was there. I heard things about her and the experiments they performed on her. She left me there for a reason and I'm sure that reason has more to do with Divinity, and her agenda, than it does with Haiden. I also have to trust my gut. I think you are right that Divinity is lying in wait…it is only a matter of time until she reveals herself."
Carrigan paused and closed her eyes for a moment. I raised my eyebrows at her and stepped forward in concern.
"Carrigan?"
"Benjamin is about to come downstairs," she whispered. "I don't want to discuss this anymore."
There was a cross tone to her words that made me uncomfortable. I bowed my head though and turned my attention back to Gabriel.
"What else did Dumbledore tell you?" I asked suggesting a conversation change.
"He doesn't know of any Juniper Tullius," Gabriel said. "She never went to Hogwarts."
"Do you think she's a Muggle born?" I asked as I picked up the platter of breakfast food. Gabriel followed my lead and picked up the dishes. We moved to the table and began to set it.
"Because of the weapon she had?" he asked. As he spoke, I stood up straight and bit into a piece of toast. "It's possible…."
"Does it bother you that she was looking for her father in our backyard?" Carrigan asked as she took a seat at the table. Once Gabriel placed a plate in front of her, she reached forward and picked up a fork, then served herself pancakes and eggs from the platter at the center of the table.
"Of course it does," I replied. "But how do we know she wasn't honestly just passing through the field?"
"Heading where?" Carrigan said quickly.
"Good morning everyone," Benjamin said pleasantly as he entered the kitchen. He crossed the room to join us at the table while buttoning the cuff of his clean-cut navy blue button-up shirt. His long hair was wet, but tied back in a low tight bun at the base of his neck. I caught Carrigan staring at him for a moment, watching him as he moved across the room, before she looked back at me and continued to talk as if he hadn't interrupted her at all.
"Please," she said with a roll of her eyes. "Since when do you believe in coincidences?"
"I don't," I replied. "My point is simply that we don't know."
"There is no point of worry about it until I can find out more about her," Gabriel said. He pulled his white tee shirt on over his muscular torso before pulling out a chair and joining us at the table.
"Who are you talking about?" Benjamin asked as he took a seat.
"Juniper Quinn Tullius," Carrigan said matter-of-factly.
"The woman you almost killed in the field yesterday?"
Carrigan nodded her head with a mouthful of pancake.
"No one just wanders into your field, Cadence," Benjamin said as he peered at me with crystal blue eyes. "You were afraid last night that someone was coming for Carrigan, what if you were right?"
"I was afraid that Haiden was being used as a diversion so that someone could snatch Carrigan," I retorted. "Since Haiden passed your security question that shoots down my theory, doesn't it?"
"Unless she wasn't after me," Carrigan replied. "Voldemort is sending Death Eaters after Haiden too. She could have been tracking her." Benjamin looked up at Carrigan with wide eyes. "What?" she asked puzzled by his expression.
"That's how we came to the house," Benjamin said. "Across the field."
Before another word could be said, Benjamin jumped out of his chair, causing it to fall to the ground loudly. He moved around the table, heading towards the front of the house.
"I'll meet you at the station," he said without looking back at us.
"Benjamin!" Carrigan called after him with a look of utter shock on her face.
I frowned deeply as Gabriel glanced at me with unnerved eyes. Carrigan released a heavy sigh and turned back to us. "He thinks that Tullius was looking for Haiden, not her father."
"You think differently?" I whispered before taking a bite of my breakfast.
"I know what I heard in her mind," Carrigan replied as she stood up from the table. She picked up the chair Benjamin had knocked over in his hasty exit. Her eyes fell on Gabriel for a few moments before she spoke again. "She was looking for her father. I'm going to finish getting ready. We should head out soon."
"Alright," I nodded, noticing that Carrigan didn't finish her breakfast. "Do you need help getting your stuff down here?"
"No, it's just the trunk and my bag. I wish we could just go straight to Hogwarts so I can see Horace," her voice faded as she walked out of the kitchen.
I looked at Gabriel as soon as she was out of earshot—not that it mattered, she could always ease drop on our conversations with her telekinesis if she wanted to, even if she was out of earshot. He raised his eyebrows at me with curiosity.
"What?"
"Why did she look directly at you when she said that Tullius was looking for her father?"
"She was too old to be my child, Cadence," Gabriel said with smiling, serious dark eyes. He was shooting down the question that was burning in my mind, was Tullius Gabriel's daughter?
"She was only in her twenties," I replied. "In which case, she would be older than Jennifer. I've always thought of you as a womanizing pig, isn't it possible that she is the result of some fantastic night of passion with one woman before you met Anita or me?"
Gabriel's smile fell and he looked away from me. "I suppose it is possible."
He stood up from the table and began to clear the dishes. I looked at him puzzled. What had I said that had upset him? Was he afraid that Tullius was his daughter? Or did he know she was and was afraid of me finding out?
"Gabriel?"
He walked away from me, heading for the kitchen sink, where he set the dirty dishes down. He leaned against the counter for a few moments, as if thinking of what to say to me. I waited patiently. I didn't want to pressure him. If Juniper Quinn Tullius was his daughter, I'm sure it would be just as much of a shock to him as to me. Unless, he already knew the answer to the question that both of us were thinking but not saying out loud.
"It's possible," he said uneasily as he stared out the window. "Of course it's possible." He turned to me and crossed his arms over his muscular chest. "It's not a secret that I've had plenty of sexual partners…."
"I'd say 'plenty' is an under statement," I muttered.
"Cadence," Gabriel sighed with aggravation.
"Sorry," I said quickly with shame. "Do you recognize her? Something about her that sparks the memory of a woman from your past?"
Gabriel shrugged. "I don't know...nothing that I can think of."
"She looked familiar to me," I said honestly. "Something about her eyes…that amber color is hard to forget."
Gabriel stood up straight as if someone had jabbed him in the side. I looked up at him from my spot in the chair quizzically.
"I'm going to run into the office real quick," he said. "I'll meet you and Carrigan at the station. You're okay to get there?"
"Yes," I nodded as he moved past me. He stopped, pivoted back and kissed my forehead. "Gabriel!"
I called after him as he marched out of the kitchen. I exhaled in disbelief and slouched down in my chair. I could hear him going upstairs, no doubt to finish dressing. A few moments later, the front door opened and slammed, announcing his exit. Carrigan appeared in the kitchen.
"Where did Gabriel go?"
"To the office," I stated with an irritated tone. "Apparently, he and Benjamin both had startling epiphanies."
"About?"
"Hell if I know," I said standing up from my chair. "You ready to go?"
"I don't want to go back," she said abruptly.
"Why?" I asked calmly even though her question had completely blindsided me.
"I could help you and Gabriel here," she insisted. "I would be more useful helping the Order than I will be at school. I'm a fully trained witch—I don't even need a Guardian anymore. I know Legilimency and how to Apparate."
"And you're only fourteen," I whispered. "I'm surprised that the Ministry hasn't come down on you for practicing underage magic."
"The restriction was lifted off of me," she said with a frank tone. "Voldemort had a Death Eater push some papers at the Ministry and lifted it."
"Carrigan," I said seriously. "Despite that, you still have a lot to learn, not specifically about magic, but about being a teenager and an adult. You will learn these things at school. And, I want you to be a child sometime. You've been so interested in training, since you could walk, that you've never had an innocent childhood—"
"Contrary to popular belief, ignorance is not bliss for some of us," she interrupted. "Being an 'innocent child' doesn't do anyone any good now that Voldemort is back. I may be fourteen but I'm not a child."
"You are," I said quickly. "You are a child. Knowing Legilimency and how to Apparate do not make you an adult, even if magically speaking they define you as fully train. There is more to growing up than that. You need to go back to Hogwarts where you are safe."
"I'm not safe anywhere," Carrigan said with a finite tone. She pivoted on her heel and left the kitchen. I frowned deeply, puzzled by the abrasive and abruptness of the conversation. Why hadn't Carrigan mentioned her concerns last night while we were packing? Was she simply getting cold feet? Was she afraid of going back to face her peers, or was she truly concerned about the Order and fighting against Voldemort?
I felt it was probably a combination of both things. I ran my hand over my forehead and carefully brushed my fingers through my hair. The startling sound of the front door slamming caused me to look up from the counter in utter shock. I rushed around the counter and towards the front of the house. Just as I pulled the door open, I saw Carrigan on the gravel path in front of the house, her trunk and bag in hand. She looked back at me with angry midnight eyes and Apparated before I could yell her name.
I dived down the porch, but she was gone. I stood in horrified shock on the gravel path in front of the farm house as rage swelled in my body. How could she act so rashly and just run off? She had done the same thing last summer, and suddenly I understood why Sirius was so angry when she had. I frowned deeply as tears welled up in my eyes. I hoped that she wasn't being a complete idiot; I hoped she was going to Hogwarts, despite not wanting to….but deep down inside of me, I was confident that she was going out on her own—to prove that she was ready to be on her own.
An hour later, I paced up and down Platform 9 ¾ , hoping that Carrigan would arrive before the train pulled out of the station. Immediately after she had left the house, I went to Hogwarts to find her. To my disappointment, she was not there. Dumbledore suggested that I wait at the station, if she did not arrive for the train, then I should widen my search. He figured that she probably just went to a friend's house—she would come to Hogwarts eventually.
The platform was starting to clear of students; only parents and relatives stood waving at the scarlet steam engine. My hope was dwindling; if Carrigan didn't arrive soon, I would be set into a wild frenzy, just like I had been when she was taken from the Ministry.
"Cadence!" Gabriel's voice called from behind me. I pivoted around to see him, Benjamin and Haiden weaving through the crowded platform towards me. Gabriel looked around bewildered when he arrived at my side. "Is Carrigan on the train already?"
"No," I said on edge. "Shortly after you made your exit, we had a disagreement and she ran off."
"She did what?" Benjamin asked with wide eyes. Haiden stopped next to him, looking just as concerned with her mismatching eyes. I gave her a cold stare for a second before looking up at Benjamin.
"She left the house with her things."
"You seem relatively calm," Gabriel said delicately as he looked me up and down.
"I'm about to burst," I whispered with a shaky voice. "But I have to trust that she will come here or go to Hogwarts."
"What was your disagreement about?"
Haiden had asked the question, which caused my eyes to flash with anger as I looked at her. What the hell was she doing here? What was Benjamin thinking with what had happened yesterday when he brought her to the house? If Carrigan did show up, she'd probably storm off again because he had brought Haiden with him.
"She doesn't want to go back to Hogwarts."
"Then why do you hope she will?"
"Because above all else, Carrigan is a rational and reasonable girl," I retorted to my niece. "She will come to reason and realize that she belongs at Hogwarts."
"She isn't the Carrigan you knew before," Haiden whispered sadly. "Yes, she is rational still, but she has more resources at her disposal now that will allow her to do as she pleases. She may not come—"
"Cadence!" called a man's voice from behind Haiden. I looked away from her and stepped forward towards the voice. I was surprised to see Arthur Weasley heading towards me. "We've been looking for you! How are you?"
"Hi, Arthur. I'm fine—where is Harry?"
"Just about to get on the train," Arthur motioned over his shoulder.
"Was Carrigan with you?"
"Carrigan?" Arthur looked puzzled. "No. What's wrong, Cadence?"
I didn't answer Arthur's question. I moved past him and dashed across the platform to Harry Potter who was helping Ginny Weasley load her things onto the train.
"Hurry," Molly Weasley said hastily. "They're about to pull out!"
"Mum, stop it," Ginny said with a roll of her eyes. She hopped onto the train just as I reached them.
"Harry," I sighed grabbing his arm.
"Cadence!" he said surprised. "Why did my mother name you my godmother?"
"Because she didn't want your aunt to be your godmother," I responded quickly. Harry nodded his head in agreement and smiled.
"I'm happy I got to see you before I left. Where is Carrigan?" he asked as he looked over my shoulder, obviously expecting her to be on the platform ready to leave for school.
"You haven't heard from her?" I asked breathlessly.
Harry looked at me with fearful green eyes. "No," he said. "I wasn't expecting to after the fight we had yesterday."
I shook my head. "She ran off, and I'm afraid I'm not sure where. I hoped she would have gone to you or Ginny, like she did last summer."
"Carrigan is different now," Harry replied, much like Haiden. "She wouldn't come to me for anything. She would go to Benjamin or Henry." Harry's tone was full of disdain. I frowned and nodded my head.
"Alright, thank you," I whispered. I pulled him into a tight hug. "Have a good term and keep an eye out for Carrigan. I will find her and she'll be at Hogwarts soon."
"Cadence," there was a tone of hesitation in Harry's voice as he spoke. I stepped back to look him in the eye. "Do you believe we can trust her?"
"Yes," I nodded. "You have to trust your instincts, Harry."
"I don't think they're the most reliable," he whispered.
The train's whistle blew loudly, echoing off the walls of the platform. "Better get going," I advised. "Be safe. Trust your gut."
Harry nodded and dashed away from me, hopping onto the train easily as it began to move. Harry stood in the entrance of the car and waved to me with a sad expression on his face. I wished I had more time to talk with him, but I was preoccupied with Carrigan's disappearance. I waved to him before turning to look around the platform. Surely, Carrigan wasn't this stupid….she had to be here somewhere…
"Harry!"
I turned when I heard Carrigan's voice shouting Harry's name. Her baldhead was unmistakable in the crowd. Swiftly, she chucked her trunk into the train car threshold, then quickly ran along side the train as it picked up speed. She threw Harry her bag, which he caught and pushed behind him before stretching his hand out of the car. Carrigan threw her arm out and jumped, catching hold of Harry in the doorframe of the car. He pulled her tight to him, so she was on board the train. Both teenagers looked out at me.
Harry stared with fearful, uncertain green eyes behind his black rimmed glasses. He held Carrigan to him closely so she wouldn't fall off the train car, but looked ambivalent. He was unsure if he could trust her; unsure if he should hold her close; unsure of where they stood. Carrigan looked just as uncertain, but somber and sad as well. Her expression was apologetic. Perhaps she felt bad for running out on me that morning, or she felt bad that our relationship wasn't what it used to be.
It was obvious to me that she was just as uncertain as Harry. Being an important asset to the Order of the Phoenix was not the true reason why Carrigan didn't want to go back to Hogwarts. She didn't want to face her peers or her closest friends. As she clung to Harry in the doorframe of the train car, it was as if she was clinging to him in hope that they could go back to the way it used to be before May…before Sirius had died…before she changed. They both wished they could go back to a point in time where they trusted each other.
I shared their uncertainty. In the long run, if Carrigan and Harry couldn't trust each other, then Voldemort's plan to break Carrigan would be achieved. He had put her through so much to prove that even the most innocent and purest of us could fall to Dark Magic. So far, Carrigan had overcome that…or at least I hoped. But, if Voldemort had managed to destroy Harry's faith in Carrigan, he was one step closer to breaking not just Carrigan, but Harry. I wasn't sure who would be more crucial to my father's downfall—Carrigan, his own blood, or Harry Potter, the boy who lived—but if Voldemort managed to break either of them, then there was little hope for the rest of us.
