. . .

As the train pulled into Central almost a week later, Envy fidgeted against the seat and tried not to worry.

He knew that showing up with Lust would complicate things. He and Roy hadn't exactly gone North with the intention of recruiting a new ally – but he was hoping the others would trust them enough to let it slide.

It was nice, he realised – the idea of being trusted. Though the more he thought about it, the more he realised he had no idea what to do with trust. He wasn't used to it.
He supposed that what he had been doing had worked, well enough. He wasn't sure why, but people who had previously hated him seemed almost to… like him. So maybe the right answer was to keep going as he had been.

He did know one thing: he was still terrified of messing it up.

"We're here," Roy said.
"What happens now?" Lust asked. He scratched his head.
"Now, we hope the others don't react badly."
"Great," Envy said. "You voiced my fears. Thanks, for that."
"I don't think it'll be that bad," Roy clarified. "At least, not as bad as it was in your case. We didn't have a precedent, then. We had no reason to believe a homunculus would abandon their master. Now we do."

Envy wasn't so sure that changed anything – but he hoped to hell the Colonel was right.

It must have been just about breakfast time – because when they entered the house, everyone was gathered around the table. When they saw Lust, everyone froze. Just for an instant. Just long enough for Envy to worry.

Ed was the first to speak.

"Don't tell me…"
"Hey guys," Envy said, plastering a grin across his face. "Guess who decided to join the good guys?"

When at first no one responded, he deflated.
"Okay, so I expected this response."
Before he could go any further, Hawkeye stepped forward. A professional smile crossed her lips.

"It's Lust, right?"
Lust, who had been standing in silence with a pensive expression, finally spoke.
"That's right. I presume you're this Lieutenant Hawkeye we've heard so much about."
In a show of grace, Hawkeye didn't take that opportunity to interrogate her on what exactly the homunculi had heard about her.

"I am," she said. "Welcome; we're thankful to have you."

Lust only shrugged. Envy's heart could have broken for her – he knew exactly where her head was at. He realised quickly that he was going to have to speak with her.

He waited a while, for things to calm down. In the meantime, he and Roy sat down with the others, and they updated each other on what had happened. He smiled a little as Roy berated the 'backup plan' Ed had made, as requested – he himself didn't really understand all of it, but he'd caught something to do with a goat and a lightning rod.

"That's it – this is the last time I leave you in charge of anything," Roy complained.
"Well you don't have to worry about that, because I don't work for you anymore!"
"Thank god."

Al and Roy had spoken at the same moment. When they realised, they both started laughing. It was a peaceful moment, like the long, cold nights huddled around Northern campfires had been. It made something in Envy's chest feel warm – as if for a moment, he knew it was going to be okay.

He caught Lust watching, out of the corner of his eye; and decided it was time.

"It's weird, isn't it?" he asked, leaning against the wall across from where she sat. She blinked, and pretended she hadn't just been staring at the group.
"It's… We never had anything like that."
He sighed.
"No, we didn't."

He kicked a piece of rubble away from himself, and quelled the searing jealousy that rose within him.
"We never got those moments of levity. We never got to sit around in a group, laughing our way through hell while we waited for things to get better. We just had to keep going – and hope that someday, they would. It's not very fair, is it?"

"Do you regret it?" He asked. "Leaving, I mean."
She grimaced.
"Strangely, no. I think I made the right choice. Did you?"
"At first? Hell yeah." He laughed to himself. "I would rather have been anywhere else."
"Except with Dante."

He paused.

"It took me a while to make that decision – and it was mostly made out of fear. In the beginning, I was just like you are now. Lost. Confused. Scared."
She opened her mouth, then shut it again – like she wasn't quite sure how to word her thoughts. He let her figure it out.

"I can't imagine what it was like for you," she said, finally. "At least I have a familiar face. You were alone, behind enemy lines – and you thought you were dying."
"Not for long. Luckily for me, the Elrics took pity. Between the two of them, they came up with a solution pretty quickly."
"About that… Do I need to be worried?"

He rose an eyebrow at her.

"Worried about…?"
"This 'solution' of theirs… How reliable is it?"
"Well, it's lasted me this long. If their theory's right, it should keep lasting. It's just mildly inconvenient, if I'm being honest."
"How's that?"

Again, he paused. He trusted her – he did. But that little, paranoid part inside him still wouldn't let him tell her everything.
"Let's put it this way: I'm used to living on autopilot, and now I actually have to take the wheel."
He crossed his arms. "I'm not about to die on you, if that's what you're worried about. If you really had to leave that necklace behind, you're in a lot more danger than I am."

He sat down. "Which means we're going to have to figure that out."
"Don't you think we have more important things to worry about?"
"Like what?"
"Like stopping her."
"Yeah. You're right."

He sighed.

"We have to stop her."
"Do we have a plan?"
"Half of one. We've been developing it as we go, to be honest."

She nodded. "I'll have to ask the others about it. I might wait a while, though. It looks a little suspicious for me to show up and immediately ask what all your plans are – doesn't it?"

Ed chose that moment to approach them, with a wary look on his face – but directed at Envy, which he found surprising.
"Hey. Can we talk about that research Al and I have been doing?"
"Sure." He turned to Lust. "Hang tight, try not to rock the boat. We'll talk about it later." Then he followed Ed to a more secluded area of the house.

"I thought we were past the shields," he said. Ed blinked.
"Oh! I'm not worried about you; not really. I'm more… worried about how you'll take this."
"Oh boy. I need to be sitting down for this, don't I?"

He dropped into a chair and closed his eyes. "Yep? Hit me."

"Just a minute – there's something else, too."
"Oh come on, don't leave me hanging!"
"I just want to make sure we're all on the same page, here."
Envy opened his eye a crack. "With what?"
"What exactly did you promise Lust?"

He groaned.

"Why does everyone keep asking me that? I didn't promise her anything!"
"She joined us because she wants something. What is it?"
He hesitated.

"She wants to be made human."

He saw the look on Ed's face, and decided it warranted further explanation.

"I know! I already told her it's very unlikely."
"It's not 'unlikely', Envy – it's impossible. I can't transmute, and Mustang doesn't know the first thing about human transmutation."
"I know that. I didn't exactly think it was a great idea to run around, telling all your enemies that you don't have alchemy. So she doesn't know that yet."
Ed glanced at Al, on the other side of the room, before responding.
"Okay, I guess you have a point." He shook his head.

"Why does she even want that?"
"What?"
"You guys are immortal. You don't age, and you can heal from almost anything. Why the hell would any of you want to give that up?"

Envy laughed.

"Funny you should ask that."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"I just… I thought you, of all people, would know that there are more important things than immortality."
Ed flushed bright red.

"That's not the same, and you know it," he grumbled. "You get the perks without any of the drawbacks. If you'd been through half the things he went through…"
"I'd lose my mind. I know."
He leaned back.
"How do I put this? She doesn't want to be human – not really. What she wants is a soul."
"A soul?"
"Yep. Homunculi are created without souls. It's the one integral piece we're missing – the one thing stopping us from being truly complete. Blah, blah, blah. I don't even know if what she wants is possible. The jury's still out on whether a soul can be brought back, once it's passed through the gate. As for creating an entirely new soul – that's never been done."

Ed noticeably flinched.
"Yeah. Uh, that's kinda the other thing I wanted to talk to you about. That theory I had?"
Envy's eyes snapped up to meet Ed's. "What do you mean?"
"That is what all the books say – that homunculi don't have souls."
"Why does it sound like there's a 'but' at the end of that sentence?"
"Well, I'm not so sure that's right, anymore."

There Ed paused, as if he was waiting for Envy to react. When he didn't, opting instead to raise an eyebrow, he continued.
"We don't know exactly what a 'soul' is – but I got the chance to study one completely removed from its body. Here's what I observed: he remembered his past life. He retained his emotions, and his personality. I never met anyone who'd seriously try to argue that he wasn't still human."
"And?"
"And you tick all of those boxes. Where did you all even get the idea that you're missing your souls, anyway?"

Envy froze.

"Well?"
"Dante," he admitted, knowing how it sounded already.
"The woman who's done nothing but lie and manipulate you?"
"Yeah…"
"And you believed her?"
"Shut up, alright? We didn't know any better. Are you going to get to this theory of yours, or not? Was there anything else? Or is it just that you think we might have souls, now? Because that's… revolutionary, but it's not exactly helpful right now. I thought you said you were gonna research Pride."

Ed sighed.

"No, you're right; there's more. Al and I were mostly trying to figure out the deal with Pride; and we think we found something. But it's… I don't know if I should say anything. It changes a lot."
"Oh, come on! When does a day pass now that something massive doesn't change in our lives? Just tell me."

"I don't know if any of you are really homunculi."

"What?"

In his defence, Envy had tried to look as though he didn't think Ed had totally lost his mind. Judging by Ed's face, he wasn't doing so well.
"Hear me out," Ed said. "I promise, I'm not pulling this out of my ass."
"Please, go on. I'd love to know how you came to this conclusion."
"Like I told you, we don't know much about homunculi. As for what we do know – well, Al and I have had access to all of that, at one time or another."
"I'm going to assume there's a point somewhere at the end of this."
"Here's what we know: homunculi are artificial humans created through alchemy."

He paused. When Envy didn't respond, he shook his head in exasperation.

"Notice anything about that description?"
"No."
"It doesn't say anything about trying to bring back the dead. That's not an actual requirement."
"What are you getting at, Pipsqueak? And what does any of this have to do with Pride?"
"Most of you weren't created with the intention of making an artificial person – you were created in an attempt to bring back someone the alchemist lost. They were trying to resurrect the real thing – not a fake."
"But it didn't work."
"But how do we know that?"

Envy's blood ran cold.

"What are you saying?"
"Each of you has memories, hopes, desires. The things that make humans… human. But that's not true of the Fuhrer, right?"

At that point, Envy simply waited for Ed's train of logic to reach the station. His own mind was racing. He had a feeling he knew what the conclusion was – but that didn't make it any more believable.

"I have a hypothesis that Fuhrer Bradley's a pure homunculus. It feels like there's nothing there because there isn't – there's nothing human inside him. The rest of you are… I dunno, tainted? No, that makes it sound bad."

Once he recovered from the shock, Envy found himself chuckling.

"So you're saying I'm a failure at being a failure? Wow, that's a new one."
"No, that's not what I meant! Damnit…"
He grinned and shook his head. "Flustering you is fun. You're terrible under pressure."
"Shut up!"
"In all seriousness, though… It's an interesting theory. I'd never thought of it that way."

He stared at the wooden table, contemplating the idea. He had always thought he'd known who and what he was. To know, suddenly, that it might all be a lie – that the identity he had built for himself may not even be real… A shiver travelled up his spine.

At the same time, it felt as though a weight had lifted from his chest.

If he wasn't what he thought, that meant all the expectations and pressures that came with that no longer applied. And that realisation was almost… relieving. If he didn't have to be this, did that not mean he was free to be whoever he wanted?

What did that look like, for him? He had no idea. It was terrifying – and thrilling.

"Thanks," he said. "For telling me."
"How do you feel about it?"
"I don't know, yet. When I figure it out, I'll let you know. In the meantime, we need to think about what this means… for Pride."
"You're right about that," Ed said, huffing. "If he really is different, then all bets are off. This could be a problem."
Envy caught himself glancing at Lust.

"Well," he said, "At least it looks like the tides are turning in our favour – for now. You ask me, we should do everything we can to take advantage of that. We're going to need it."

He hoped it would be enough. He really wasn't sure.

. . .

Dante was fuming. She clutched the silver necklace so tight that it left a mark when she opened her hand. It was too much, for her frail skin – several large pieces peeled away, and she cursed.

She needed to remember to be more careful with this body. Fear coursed through her, as it very occasionally did – each body she took was weaker than the last. If she didn't find the cause soon, she didn't know what would happen.

It was an uncomfortable reality that she could permanently lose the ability to move bodies. She didn't want to think about it. Not yet. There was still time.

"You called?" A familiar voice asked. She answered without even turning to face him.
"We need to do something about the Elrics, before I lose any more of you to their vile manipulation."
"But Master, I thought you had plans for them – beyond just forcing them to create a stone."
"I did. And perhaps those plans can still come to fruition. If not, well… I'm certain their father will be pleased to have some company."
"So what would you have me do?"
"You're the Fuhrer – what do you think we should do?"

He considered her words.

"Well first, we should take care of this pathetic uprising they're trying to start."
She laughed. "Yes; it's all so transparent, isn't it? And I imagine they think they're being rather clever. You know more about the military than I do – is there any cause for concern?"
He rolled his eye – the one most thought of as his 'good eye'.
"I don't believe so. The success they've had has been limited at best. Still, there are paths we can take to prevent it from developing into a problem. I believe we should take them."

She nodded.

"Very well then. Start on that. In the meantime, I'm going to find a solution to our biggest problem."
"And what's that?"
"Removing the Elrics from play. For now, having them on the board is too dangerous."
"I see. I'll get to work."

He left her to seethe in peace – finally. She shook a few more flakes of skin off her hand, and frowned.

First she would deal with her enemies. Then she would research her condition.

. . .

Ed stretched as he walked into the living room. Al was clutching a paper of some kind in his hand – Ed wondered if it was a remnant of their earlier research.
"Where's Envy?" he asked, throwing his hands up. Al looked up.
"Why?"
"Because we're supposed to be planning our next move," Ed said, with the tone of someone who suspected Al may have sustained a brain injury. Al shrugged.

"He said he was going to the graveyard."
Ed frowned.
"What? Why?"
"No idea. Maybe he knew someone there. I didn't think it was appropriate to ask."
"I guess. I wasn't under the impression he had any friends though, except Dante and the other…"

He trailed off. Come to think of it, he had heard a name from Envy's mouth.

Oh.

"Actually, maybe he did. I uh… I might go check if he's okay. And you know, remind him that we're supposed to be planning."
"Gently remind," Al corrected, as Ed left. "Brother? Remember your tact!"

The door had already closed, and Al sighed. Then he looked furtively around the room, and went back to his piece of paper.

At the cemetery, Envy stood over her stone.
It was old and weathered; the name inscribed on it was barely even legible, these days. He clicked his tongue in annoyance. She deserved to be remembered.

"You know," he said aloud, "Sometimes I wish I'd never met you. Not like it would make much of a difference, now – you'd still be there, and I'd still be here. But at least you would've had more time. Gotten married, had some kids."

He kicked a nearby stone, and watched as it ricocheted off the cemetery wall. Then he shook his head.
"And now I'm standing here, talking to a corpse, like a goddamn idiot. Shit. Sorry, Mary. For everything."

"Who was she?"

He jumped – then turned sharply to glare at Ed.

"Have any of you heard of privacy?"
"It's a public graveyard, you know," Ed pointed out. "Who says I followed you here? I'm allowed to want to visit someone, too."
"Really? What a fucking coincidence. Okay, who were you here for, then?"

Ed opened his mouth to answer, then shrugged and pointed at an ornate stone off to the side. Without even moving closer, Envy could tell it was military – and recent. He flinched.

"Right. I forgot this is where they put the soldiers, now."
"So who was she?" Ed insisted. Envy gritted his teeth against the anger – it wasn't directed at Ed, not really, and he knew he shouldn't take it out on him.

"No one," he said. "Some girl I know."
"Doesn't seem like no one, but I can tell it's a sore spot. The grave's pretty old," he observed. "Is she from when you were human?"
"Ha! I wish. Maybe if I'd had a girlfriend, I would've moved out younger. And then I wouldn't have died."

He didn't quite realise the implication of his words before they had left his mouth. He flushed.

"Girlfriend?" Ed asked. "Sorry. I shouldn't pry."
"Well it's a bit late for that now," Envy huffed. "Besides, I should probably talk about it anyway. I never really have."
"Never?" Now Ed looked like he felt sorry for Envy, which made him feel a bit ill.
"I guess I never really had someone I could talk to about this stuff," he admitted.

"Alright," he said. "I guess I had kind of a thing for her. Not that any of it matters. This was always going to happen, one way or another. I'm immortal, and she wasn't. If I had a choice, I wouldn't have picked the way it happened, but I don't get to be upset that it happened."
"What do you mean, 'the way it happened'?"

His throat caught on the words.

"Dante kinda… found out about her. And well, she didn't want anyone around who might distract me, so…"

Ed's stunned silence said it all.

"Holy shit. I'm so sorry."
"I try not to think about it, if I'm being honest. But it's weird – recently, I haven't been able to keep her out of my head. I've started dreaming about her, for pete's sake. I don't know why. I went a hundred years without her crossing my mind – now she's back, like some damn ghost. And I can't make her go away."

Ed thought about it, moving closer to the grave – and Envy.

"Well, you've been dealing with a lot of stuff lately."
"What, life threatening danger? That's not exactly new."
"No, I'm not talking about that. I mean, I think that – stop me if I'm wrong here – you got really, really used to dealing with your problems by locking them away. Is that fair?"

Envy nodded, slowly.
"Makes sense so far."
"Okay. The thing is, you've started dredging some of those problems back up recently."
"Alright," Envy said, "I think I see where you're going with this, Pipsqueak. Open the floodgates and everything comes back out – not just the stuff I planned for. Right?"
"Well, yeah."

He shook his head, annoyed.
"Well, I've got a lot of crap floating back there. Looks like this is going to be fun."
"You have a support system, now. You'll be able to handle it better than you could've back then."
While he didn't answer aloud, Ed's words had managed to reach that tiny soft spot in Envy's heart. He had… a support system? That sounded awfully nice.

"I…" His voice had come out scratchy. He cleared his throat and tried again.
"We should head back," he finally settled on. It was nowhere near the graceful acceptance he had originally gone for; but that wasn't really his style, he supposed.
Ed nodded.

"Yeah, you're right."

. . .

When they arrived back at the house, Lust was engaged in conversation with the others. It made Envy pause; he hadn't expected her to be accepted so quickly.

"Ah, you're here," Roy said. "We've just been updating Lust on the situation."
"I appreciate it," she said. "I know you have little reason to trust me."
"And you have little reason to trust us," Al pointed out. "But for now, we all have a common enemy. That matters."
"It does count for a lot," Roy said. "If two parties share an enemy, common ground can always be found between them."

"Ah, you and your military rhetoric," Ed sighed. Roy glared at him.
"Perhaps if you had paid more attention…"
"I know, I know – maybe I would've been a better soldier. That was never my goal, and you know that."

As he finished speaking, Ed's eyes drifted to his brother.
"Hey Al," he said, suddenly. "What'cha reading over there?"
Envy looked over – and realised that indeed, Al was resting a sheet of paper on his knee.
Ed moved to look over his shoulder – uncharacteristically, Al folded the paper to hide its contents. Envy narrowed his eyes at the interaction.

"It's nothing," Al said. "Don't worry about it."
Ed frowned. "What, is it from your girlfriend or something?"
Al flushed bright red. "No!"
"Ha! That was a wild guess – but it is from a girl, isn't it?"
"It's not!"
"Boys," Hawkeye said, with an eye roll. "There's nothing wrong with dating, at your age."

Al ran to hide the paper in his room. The conversation drifted on, naturally. As if nothing had happened.

Envy wasn't so sure.

They spent the rest of the evening bouncing around some ideas, about where to go next with their plans. Lust managed to contribute some useful information about Dante's current state of mind – and it was worse than Envy had feared.

"Sounds like she's about one step away from snapping," he said.
"I know," Lust agreed, shivering. "We need to be careful. She's a dangerous woman."
"You think I don't know that?"

"There's another problem," she added. "That little plan of yours, to start an uprising? She's onto you."
"Shit, really?"
"She thinks it's quite amusing, if I'm being honest."
"Well, there goes that plan."

"Maybe not," Roy said. "You never know. It's possible she doesn't expect the uprising to actually gain traction."
"Look," Envy said, "How much time do we actually want to waste on this plan that might not even work?"
"It's not a waste."
Envy paused at the change in Roy's tone.

"This is about more than just Dante for you, isn't it?"
Roy nodded.
"This whole country. All of its people. They're all being used as toys in her game. That stops now; one way or another."
Ed frowned.

"You have to understand how risky this is, Mustang. You know if you fail, you won't ever make Fuhrer? No one will appoint the man who tried to start a coup."
"Of course I do."

"Either way," Envy said, "The best way we can stop Pride right now is by stopping Dante. She's always been the one in charge – not him. If the rebellion isn't going to do that, we need another plan."
"First, I think we all need to rest," Hawkeye said. "The two of you just got back from the front lines – and you look like you've barely slept."
"But…"
"None of us are any use exhausted." She raised her hand to silence Envy, who had been about to argue.
"I know we're not making a lot of progress; and I know that's frustrating. We're going to figure this out, somehow. But in order to do that, we need to rest."

His shoulders slumped.

"Okay, fine. We take a nap. Then we figure out how the hell we're going to stop Dante."

He stomped to the room he shared with Al.

Hawkeye must have been right about Envy's exhaustion – because for the first time in years, he actually slept through the night. He regretted it quickly.

Because the next morning, he woke up to an empty bed next to him, and Ed's panicked shrieks.

. . .