Author's Note: Prompt suggested by Skittles The Sugar Fairy.
R is for Retardant
The moment that the pallet was dropped off, Blade knew that the packaging was all wrong. Missing was the pile of bags covered in familiar words, logos, and warnings. In their stead, the pallet was tightly packed with a bunch of tightly packed boxes, each far too small for the Chief's comfort.
Instantly concerned that they must have gotten an incorrect shipment, Blade had immediately gotten on the phone to try to trace the problem...only to find that the problem was far worse than he had planned. Apparently, someone in the park had apparently their Phos-Chek company rep and canceled their retardant order. After a bit more pushing, it became clear the person behind the call was the new superintendent.
There was only one way to solve this, so Blade kicked his engine into gear flew down to the Park's headquarters, and rolled straight into Cad's office without bothering to knock. "I don't know what you purchased with my team's retardant funds, but return…IT…NOW."
Cad looked as though he had just sucked on a lemon. He hummed and hawed, doing his best not to look the pissed helicopter in the eye before finally blurting out that part of the reason he got such a good price on the retardant was because it had a no return policy so Blade was just going to have to deal with it.
At the Superintendent's words, Blade had been too livid to even dare a reply. Instead, he shot the SUV one last glare before storming out of the office and beelining it back to base where he landed hard enough that even Maru winced when he came in contact with the ground.
"So, what did our fearless leader do this time?" Cabbie, the only vehicle brave enough to actually approach the enraged helicopter, prodded gently.
"Canceled our retardant order and purchased this crap with our budget instead." Blade spat motioning to the still packed pallet.
"So you are going to return it all right?" Maru asked…and when Blade didn't give an answer he asked again. "Right?"
"Cad got such a 'great deal' partially because he signed a no returns policy."
"Of course, he did." Maru scrubbed his windshield with a tine as he let out an exasperated groan.
"So let me get this right." Cabbie looked like he was about ready to land on someone. "Our retardant budget got canceled, and then the superintendent spent our budget on a pallet of who knows what?"
"That is pretty much the sum of things." Blade stared at the ground trying while trying to remain calm. But that proved to be difficult when the team started to unpack the pallet to find it was stacked with at least a hundred small extinguishers. That would have been bad enough…but upon closer inspection it was clear that their predicament was far worse than they had originally thought, because not only did they have nearly a hundred fire extinguishers, all of the extinguishers appeared to be within six months of their expiration date.
Blade looked at the pile in despair, not knowing whether to scream or cry. Most of the other members of base were experiencing a similar level of distress…but one picked up the extinguisher and fiddled a bit with the tag.
"Blade?" Maru looked up at him with a mischievous grin playing on his lips. "I think I have an idea."
"I am just grateful that we managed to get that FEMA training grant to cover the costs of these extinguishers because we wouldn't have been able to afford to put in our Phos-Chek order otherwise." Blade muttered to Maru as he watched the smokejumpers putting the various Piston Peak Rangers through their paces.
So far it had gone surprisingly smoothly, especially when they had gotten the okay from the Department of the Interior to make the training mandatory. That said, Blade had known that the last batch of the day was going to be a little bit different because it included one very grumpy-looking SUV.
"I have more important things to do." The Superintendent glared as he rolled over to the helicopter.
"Then you should have thought about that before you messed with our retardant order." Blade gave his boss one of his best customer service smiles. "But since you handed us this mess, we followed your instructions and are doing our best to make the most of the situation."
Cad Spinner bitched and moaned about 'deodorant' but, to his credit, he remained through the entire training and completed all of the tasks required to complete his extinguisher training certificate. He even did his best to give a few tight smiles towards the camera recording the event for the Park's newsletter, before slinking back to headquarters muttering about what it was going to take to get all the water spots off his skin.
To the smokejumpers credit, they actually remained civil to the superintendent through the entire training. They even kept their mouths shut and didn't allow a giggle to pass their lips when the SUV messed up…at least they didn't allow a giggle to slip through while Cad was still on base. The moment the rangers they had been training were out of earshot the whole gaggle dissolved into howls of laughter that lasted late into the night.
In the end, all was well that ended well, and many of the rangers commented about just how useful the extinguisher training had been. So, Blade chose to write a grant for the next year, then the year after that and eventually extinguisher training became an annual event…though they never did manage to get Cad Spinner to attend another one of them.
End Note: Alright, we have survived Cad which means it is time to take on the letter S! What are your ideas?
