File #6
Consider That a Divorce
The short burst from my rifle ended up missing Jessica. Apparently she was very nimble. I should have realized that…you know because of the circus theme of this area. Man, I'm not very good at putting 2 and 2 together huh? Jessica disappeared into the shadows and started laughing like a god damned hyena. That was unsettling...well that and the fact that more of those demon clown guys had appeared out of nowhere wearing tuxedos. I fucking HATE clowns. Why do I always feel like I'm in some sort of horror movie? Bad news was that I only had one incendiary grenade left. Piss. Ah well, I quickly pulled the pin and hurled it at one of the clowns…but it went wide and exploded yards away from either of them. Fuck. The 2 clowns laughed evilly at me and lunged at me. I was disarmed and was being restrained by them with my arms behind my back. Jessie reemerged from the shadows with a terrified looking BSAA soldier dressed as a minister. The BSAA soldier was an older female with blonde hair matted with dirt and it looked like she's seen some shit over the past few days. Jessica was currently wearing a very old and filthy looking wedding dress as well as what looked like half of an old harlequin mask over the "Chris-half" of her face. I'll admit, that made this slightly less bad. Keyword being slightly. It was still bad. Imagine if Laura found out about this? Jeez. Jessica shoved the BSAA soldier forward and said "Begin. NOW." The BSAA soldier stumbled into me, quickly deduced who I was and whispered "Help me."
"WHAT WAS THAT?!" Jessica yelled. "Zacky, rule one of being with me is that I will be the only woman you talk to from now on. Understand?" I cocked my eyebrow at her…which just made her moan in pleasure. I hate all of this more than you do. Trust me. Jessica continued speaking "Now, Minister Voth, if you would marry us, that would be spectacular." Ahh yes! Voth! I knew I recognized this person! She was one of Mom's friends. Can't remember her first name though. Julia? No that's not right…starts with a J though…Julie? No…Jade? Yeah! Jade Voth! That's it! Jade meanwhile gulped and began what was apparently a long speech about love and marriage. It took me a few minutes to realize what she was actually attempting to do. Stalling for time and giving me an opportunity to save us both. I started to steal glances around the room and spied numerous things. Corpses now being arranged as guests at a wedding reception, some clown looking bastard beginning to set up a DJ booth, and more Red-Zombies shambling about. As Jade began to tell the "congregation" some details about me…most of which were a bit embarrassing like how, as a young child, I would often follow my mom around at work when she had to bring me (because Dad was away) and would often be found sitting in a corner drawing pictures of my family. One of which is still framed in my parents bedroom (one by Jenna is in there too). Back to the present, I did manage to spy something by the food area. A large canister of…liquid nitrogen…Bruh… are you fucking KIDDING me? Who needs that much liquid nitrogen?! What, is Jessica going to freeze me in order to keep me young and youthful forever? On second thought…I would not be surprised. Jessica wasn't really paying attention to what I was doing. She was too busy…imagining me drawing her like one of my French girls if you know what I mean. I caught Jade's attention and gave a slight nod telling her silently to continue. Jade eventually said "If there's anyone here who believes that these 2 should not be wed, speak now or forever hold your peace." I took the opportunity to throw my voice like how a ventriloquist would and said "I object!" very faintly and without moving my lips. Jessica's eyes snapped open and she began scanning the area like an angry hawk with her teeth bared.
"WHO. SAID THAT. WHO!" Jessica snarled. I cleared my throat and spoke (after silently promising myself to never bring this up to Laura...or my Mom as long as I live)
"Babe, I believe it came from over by the food area. Why don't you go look with your two friends here," I said in a passable calm voice. Jessica's gaze snapped to me before giving me a seductive smile. Help.
"Good idea oh husband of mine, you two, release my man. Now. We'll go deal with the HOMEWRECKER and then he and I can consummate this marriage immediately. Wait for me right here baby. Mama will be right back!" Jessica said before she licked her hand and rubbed it against my crotch. I hate it. I hate it so much. Even Jade looked pretty disgusted but whatever, the plan worked. The clowns released me and followed Jessica over to the food area and the 3 of them began to look around. Jade looked at me and whispered "What are you planning?" I glanced at the pistol holstered at my side and then pointed at the rifle I still had slung across my back. Idiots. You always ALWAYS need to double check if you disarmed someone fully before taking them hostage. In this case, I'm defining "being taken hostage" as "being forced to marry a crazy person. As most dudes would probably tell each other "you never stick your dick in crazy" and Jessica wasn't just the textbook example of crazy, she was the whole college major. Jessica was starting to get agitated because she and her clowns couldn't find the objector so she turned to face me and I saw her face go from annoyance to pure rage. Why? Because I had taken out my rifle and was aiming it at my "wife."
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DO-"
"Bitch. Chill," I said before firing at the tank. My aim was true this time and the bullet punctured the tank with a satisfying clang and a hiss. Before Jessica was able to move out of the way, the tank exploded and flash froze everything within a few yards of it. I had grabbed Jade and dropped to the ground to avoid any shrapnel just in case. After the ringing in my ears subsided, Jade and I stood back up and I looked toward the place where the tank used to stand. The tank was blown apart and there was this vapor looking gas everywhere in the general area. There were also 3 new ice sculptures. One was shorter than the other and her frozen face was still contorted with rage. I walked over to the frozen Jessica and examined her for a few minutes as the liquid nitrogen dissipated. I looked into her face and saw that she was somehow still alive but her eyes were different. They weren't filled with that manic hunger for me and my manhood, instead they were telling me to end her suffering. Then it hit me. Jessica must have been manipulated into this whole thing by Grim. I nodded, pulled out my pistol, aimed it at Jessica's head and fired. Her head exploded into shards of ice and pink goo before the rest of her body crumbled into dust.
I barely got the pistol back in my holster before I was assaulted by Jade who had hugged me tightly and was saying "thank you" over and over into my ear.
"Anytime Jade. How…how long have you been out here?" I asked. Jade released me and began rubbing her hands together like she always does when she's anxious.
"About a few days. I wanted to see what happened to your dad because your mother has been so upset for the last few months. I deducted he must have been taken in this area and my hypothesis was proved right. I was able to infiltrate that bunker before they modified it to take the keycards and I saw where your dad was. He's still alive. They need him to extract more blood to keep running tests on that new virus they are developing. I was attempting to rescue him myself when that Jessica character found me and brought me here. She intended to kill me but must have overheard me talking about you to your dad and she became obsessed with you. She kept me alive to ask me questions about you and what you liked…and what you liked in a woman," Jade explained.
"Well, it helps that the woman doesn't look like my father for starters," I answered. Jade chuckled. "Did you happen to know where Jessica's keycard is?" I asked before I caught a glint of something shiny in the pile of ice that was once Jessica. I reached down and retrieved a very cold keycard as well as some more of those weird coin things from earlier. I brushed some of the ice off and gave it a small durability test. It didn't break. Spectacular. Into the key item pouch with you Mr. Keycard! I turned back to Jade.
"Jessica looked familiar. Was she famous or something before she got herself into this mess?" I asked. Jade nodded.
"She was a famous entertainer from one of the Scandinavian countries. I can never remember which one. Her family immigrated to the States years ago. Jessica made her living as a clown for children's birthday parties, dancer and singer. She was also stunningly beautiful when she was younger. There was a huge sex scandal that happened before you were born that caused the end of her career and she faded into obscurity ever since. Actually…that just dawned on me. Jessica was born in the 70s. But she looks exactly how she did when she was in her 30s right before the scandal happened," Jade explained as the 2 of us started to leave the tent.
"Must be Grim's doing. Five bucks he promised her her career back if he joined his cult or something. I assume you are in no condition to join me on my quest?" I asked. Jade winced and shook her head.
"I spied a Jeep or something in the area. I'll take that back to BSAA HQ and send back up. How long has it been since you left?"
"I would say about 3-4 hours maybe?"
"Oh boy…they might already think you're dead. I'll need to hurry. I know how much your mom is protective of you and I also know that girl Laura Chambers is infatuated with you. Did you know that?"
"Very much so. Yes," I said shortly and begged Jade to drop the subject. She did…after smirking. Dammit. Why everybody gotta know about my personal life! Bogus!
"Mhm. I figured. Zack…before I go…please…come back alive…if I know your mom…she's probably not even talking to anyone now. She's been dealing with Chris's disappearance for months and I don't think she'd be able to handle either of you dying," Jade told me. I nodded. She was right of course. I refused to do anything to cause my mom harm. I used to get teased by some of the older kids in middle school because they saw me hug my mom before going to school. They were relentless that entire day so I eventually retaliated with "at least my mom is actually around and not dating a different dude every week." That one got me sent to the office where Mom and Dad had arrived to see what I had done. Dad's face after the principal had told him what I had said to the bullying douche was pretty amusing. Plus that angered the principal pretty badly and he started yelling at Dad for not taking this seriously…to which Dad had responded with "What, are you one of that kid's mom's exes or something?" Mom had choked on a sip of her water. Then the principal threatened to expel me but Dad had laughed that off too and explained that we were moving literally that weekend to where we had been for most of my life. Mom pulled Jenna and I out of school early and took us for ice cream. I still remember what Dad had told me as Mom and Jenna were in the bathroom "Never be ashamed of loving your mother Zack. You and I are both lucky to have her in our life." I was quickly brought back to the present when a Red-Zombie yelled my mom's name at me. I side stepped the lunge and stabbed my knife into its spine. Events like that continued as I escorted Jade to the Jeep so instead, I'll tell you about that first night Laura and I spent together before becoming a couple.
I was in the middle of my vacation (THAT XANDER APPROVED but whatever) and currently sitting on the couch watching a baseball game on TV. Jenna was supposed to be coming over tonight just to hang out and eat pizza and stuff. Should be fun. The pair of us could talk about how much of a scared bitch I was to talk to any girl that piqued my interest. Granted, I happened to still be a little on edge about the last one and subsequent mental breakdown. Eventually, after watching a particularly nice catch from one of the players, I heard a knock at my door and I got up off the couch to answer it. When I opened the door, I did not expect Laura to be standing there so I recoiled a bit. She smirked at me.
"Hi cutie," she said and folded her arms. I happened to be a few drinks in so I didn't fully register that Jenna wasn't there so I just said
"Hey Laura. Didn't think you'd be joining us. Jenna's still on her way. Come in," I said and made my way back to the couch. Laura joined me and I just remembered how close she got initially. Jesus Christ how was I missing signals like this?! I feel like Uncle Leon… but I digress. Back to the story. Laura was taking a look around my apartment…yes, it was clean. As for decor, I had pretty much the basics. The couch, TV stand, shelf full of movies and games and a table with a few chairs. I handed Laura a drink (apparently I had guessed correctly in what her favorite drink was… but in reality, I just made my Mom's favorite drink out of muscle memory. A cosmo) and sat down next to her.
"So, you know who my mother is right?" she asked. It took me a second to answer.
"Yes. Rebecca Chambers right? Met her a few times when I was little. I don't recall seeing you though."
"My dad stayed at home with me when I was growing up so my mom could work. He was happy to do it. He and I are still very close. Like you and your parents. My mom tells me your parents saved her and her squad from that whole mansion incident."
"Ah yes. I heard that story many times. My mom liked to tell me that she had to save my 'big strong' father from a prison cell and that he immediately hugged her when she opened the door. My dad tells me she fell asleep on his shoulder on the way back to RCPD. You ever hear of a writer called Christine Kennedy?"
"Yes actually. I've read one of her books. The one about the leeches. It was extremely similar to the mission my mom was sent on before the mansion incident."
"That's because it pretty much is. Christine's my cousin. Her parents are Claire and Leon Kennedy. She adapts the missions they went on into her own fictional world although they take on a more medieval fantasy rather than grounded in our reality."
"That explains a lot. Is she allowed to do that?"
"Technically yes. She changes a lot but the basic premise is the same. I believe the antagonist of the leech one about your mom was some mad necromancer named Jimothy Markovic or something." I said. Laura nodded. We had proceeded to talk about stuff like this for the next several hours with us consuming more and more alcohol as time went on. Eventually Laura had spied my guitar nearby because my stupid ass had forgotten to put that in my room earlier.
"Hang on a second, you play?' Laura asked me now a little slurred. I had to focus my eyes onto what she was pointing at before answering "Oh yeah. I do that when I'm really bored."
"Play me something."
"What the…what kind of douche move is that?"
"Pardon"
"Isn't that something every girl ever hates? Some guy who has a guitar is trying to woo her with a song?"
"We'll see. C'mon. Pwease?" she asked and pretended to pout. Against my better judgement and because I had booze in me, I grabbed the guitar and strummed it to see if it was in tune.
"That doesn't count," Laura said. I raised my eyebrows and struggled to pick a song from the list of the ones I knew. For some reason, my mind immediately went to Jenna and my fingers started to play a song from a movie we liked watching as kids. It also happened to be the same song my family and friends heard me playing from my room before some summer party. After I finished that song, again I thought of one of my family members because the booze told me too…in this case it was my mother…so I began playing her favorite song I had learned for her birthday one year before ending on a song I had played for my parents 20th Anniversary party. They had even danced to it. Dunno, who Mom loved more that day. Me or Dad…Dad probably but whatever. I finished playing and looked up to see Laura sitting there on my couch with a large smile on her face.
"Well Zack, many guys have tried to woo me with music before but you have the benefit of actually being good unlike the others," she said and put her hand on my knee. I don't really remember what happened after but there you go, that's pretty much what happened that night before the Buffalo, NY Incident.
Jade and I arrived at the Jeep with no issues and she climbed in. She hotwired it to life and drove off down a hidden path and out of sight. I took a moment to assess what I had left in my pockets and view my surroundings. I had a good amount of ammo left, some first aid items and the 2 keycards I had already obtained. That was good. I was halfway there. I just needed 2 more and then I could save my dad and according to Jade, he was still alive. I knew that last part already but hearing Jade confirm it was quite reassuring. As I watched Jade leave the Esmark Mountains, I spied a blue looking flame burning nearby with a familiar looking figure under it. I proceeded to make my way towards him and I smirked to myself when I realized who it was.
"Got some rare things on sale, stranger!" was his greeting to me as I approached. On the ground in front of him sat a few healing items and something that said "upgrades also available." I checked to see if I was adequately stocked with healing items, I was and then asked "Upgrades huh? As in you'll tune up my weapons for me?" The merchant guy nodded enthusiastically. I held out my pistol and 2 rifles to him.
"Let's see, I can increase the firepower and capacity at least once on each of these stanger. I assume you have the coin?" he asked. I pulled out some of the coins. The merchant guy quickly counted up the coins in his head, took the ones he needed and began to work his magic on my arsenal. It looked like he needed a minute so I decided to lean against a nearby tree. My mind wandered to thoughts of my family and friends. Auntie Claire might also believe that I'm dead. That made me feel pretty uneasy. I don't think I ever told you that she loves me almost as much as my mom does. I was her only nephew after all plus Jenna and I were a couple years older than Christine and her brother Glenn. I saw a lot of Auntie Claire growing up…and she was present during the aforementioned thing with Sherry. Don't tell Laura but Sherry is in fact extremely attractive. Everyone in my immediate family likes to remind me of that pretty much whenever I let my guard down. What didn't help was that during Mom and Dad's 20th Anniversary party, Sherry and I slow danced to some old school R&B song. I closed my eyes and nodded to myself when I remembered that event. The look on mom's face was nothing short of radiant. Dad had caught my eye and gave me a thumbs up.
"There you go, stranger!" the merchant said and handed me back my weapons. I holstered my pistol and put both of the rifles on my back. I went to talk to the merchant again but just like previously, he had already vanished.
I walked off in a random direction for several minutes doing my best to avoid Red-Zombies and picking up various items like more of those coins. Eventually I came upon a location right out of a nightmare. Stretched out before me was a multitude of weeping willows shadowing a clearing in almost complete darkness. Great. Good thing my glasses had that night vision mode or else this would be pretty terrible to navigate. I pulled out my StG44 and walked forward into the clearing. I saw the outline of a tall building about 50 yards away. If I could guess, it looked like a church. Suddenly I heard footsteps coming from my right. I also heard the snort and whinny of a horse. I quickly hit the dirt and scanned the area for the source of the noise and what I saw nearly made me shit my pants. I saw what could only be described as an omen of my impending death. A figure was sitting astride a black horse with flaming red eyes. A figure with no head atop its shoulders but rather under one of its arms. The head had a wicked smile stretched across his face and the flesh of the skin had the consistency of moldy cheese. In its other hand he held a whip made of what I thought was a human spine. The horse stopped suddenly before its head turned to face my direction. I gulped as the rider also turned to face me and I saw the mouth of its head begin to move.
"Zackary Redfield!" it shouted. I froze in absolute terror. The voice I heard coming from this thing was scarier than any clown that has ever existed. The horse walked towards me, its hooves crunching twigs and leaves alike as it strode forward. I was still unable to move out of sheer terror. Right before the horse's massive hoof would have smashed my head into the dirt, I rolled to the side and I felt some of the gold coins fall out of my pocket. The figure on the horse laughed evilly and then threw something that looked and smelled like blood at me. The horse turned to face me and started walking forward again but then it reared in what looked like pain. Plus part of its hoof was now bubbling as if I threw acid at it. I frowned slightly. What the hell caused it to do that? I took a closer look at the area where the horse's hoof landed and saw the gold coins on the ground. Really? This thing didn't like gold? And then it hit me. Dullahan. That's exactly what this thing was…or at least what it was based on. I know this because of Jenna's interest in Irish mythology. It's part of the reason she chose the name of Banshee as her callsign. Jenna often told me most of the evil creatures in Irish folklore have a weakness to gold. I got to my feet as "Dullahan" recovered fully. I caught another glimpse of the severed head's face and it was just as I thought. Half of it looked like my dad's. I reached into my coin pocket and grabbed a small handful of gold coins and held it ready. "Dullahan" screamed in anger before he had the horse charge at me. I chucked the handful of gold coins at it when it was in range. That caused it to begin melting into black goo while wailing in pain. That was disturbing…plus the fuck was that? That seemed like one of those gimmick fights in certain video games. You know the ones right? Anyway, I let the thing melt into a puddle of muck on the forest floor and made my way towards that church looking building. The "Dullahan"'s screams echoed into the night sky as I checked the door of the building. My hunch was right, it was a church. The door opened with a creek and I made my way inside. The place looked long abandoned. The rows of pews were lined with layers of dust and cobwebs. At the front altar there were the typical decorations of a religious building but instead of a crucifix, there was the symbol of the Disciples of Azrael. There were also fresh corpses of what looked like Disciples of Azrael members. All of them had their mouth's agape with sunken white skin. Did something suck the life out of them? All of a sudden an ear splitting screech cut its way through the eerie silence of the church. I covered my ears and looked around for the source of the noise. From the rafters, I spotted a woman in a while cloak with long black hair. She floated to the ground gracefully and looked in my direction with black eyes and had her sharp teeth bared. She screamed again and lunged.
