A/N: Thank you guys for all your love and support! I can't tell you how grateful I am for y'all!

Special thank you to Mel Cee~ my amazing beta:)

Fiddling was had, all mistakes are my own.

Please let me know your thoughts and predictions! I love hearing them:)

I don't own Twilight, only my plot;)


"Come on, Bella. Please let me drive you home. It's getting chilly out, and you live all the way in Astoria," Peter pleaded, wanting an excuse to spend more time with her even if it would be a short drive from Williamsburg. It wasn't chilly since it was seventy-five degrees out, but he thought it sounded as good as any other reason to take her home.

Peter was one of the few people left in the city with a car. He didn't have an official parking spot in front of his apartment building, so it would have made sense to sell the car, but he was attached to it. He lived in a busy part of Brooklyn which only made street parking harder to find, so he was frequently getting tickets for illegal parking.

Bella shook her head for the second time, declining his offer. She hated driving and riding in cars, ever since him. Every time she had to take a taxi somewhere, Bella had flashbacks of him buying her Billy's truck and then their disastrous last ride together. With the recent news of Billy's passing, the thought of getting into a car made her even more sad.

So many mundane things seemed so heavy for Bella. The trauma of her childhood and youth never left her. She had many fears develop, and sometimes new ones popped up when she least expected it. Take New Year's two years ago for example…

"Peter, thank you, but no. I have to stop at a few places before I head home. Alice is working late, so this is my opportunity to get things done. You know how she can be." Bella gave him a half-hearted smile. It was a lie. She had no clue what shift Alice was working.

"Fine. But can I still take you to dinner Wednesday night?" Peter reasoned, playing with his car keys, nervous about her reaction. Bella wasn't like typical girls. She was challenging and a little bit closed off, but once you peeled back her layers, you saw that she was witty, smart, and beautiful inside as well as out.

Bella shuffled her feet and looked down, not because she didn't want to go on another date with Peter—she definitely wanted to—but it was a question of whether or not she could. Peter and Bella's courtship has been ramping up over the past few weeks, and Bella knew the issue of sex would be on the horizon soon. She just hoped she was ready this time.

Throughout the years, Bella had tried to move on. She really did.

Bella went as far as listening to Alice on her twenty-first birthday when she told her to give Jared, the bartender, her number. This was in-between shots of tequila, and Bella was impressed that he didn't mind the loopy conversation she managed as a result of the alcohol running through her veins. He was used to it as a bartender, and he found Bella's shyness and rambling endearing.

Alice was pretty proud of herself when the pair continued to date after the innocent flirting at Bella's birthday celebration. In fact, they dated on and off all the way from Bella's birthday in September until New Year's.

During their brief romance, Jared slowly opened Bella's world and heart again after having it ripped from her chest. Jared was funny, almost goofy. He made her laugh, and it had been so long since she had done that.

Bella tried to push thoughts of Edward out of her head as they first kissed.

She tried not to flinch when he gave her simple touches that were a bit too reminiscent of the boy who she used to cuddle with every night for years.

Bella even willed herself to take the initiative to escalate their physical relationship to third base by November.

But when push came to shove, Bella couldn't get Edward and the metaphorical mark he had on her out of her mind. That was her problem on New Year's two years ago…


Jared was playing jazz music through the speakers in his small studio apartment. He moved from the stove as the grilled cheese sandwiches he'd prepared for Bella were finished.

She'd run out to the corner store to grab ice cream for their junk food party for two on this quiet, cozy New Year's Eve.

He was wearing on of those stupid sparkly hats that Bella had convinced him was necessary.

Bella was standing in the bodega, ice cream in hand, staring at a pack of condoms. She had been having an internal battle with herself for the last ten minutes. Jared was obviously going to send the search party out for her soon if she didn't hurry up and make a decision.

She chewed the corner of her thumb once more and said "fuck it" before she set the condoms and the ice cream down by the register. She needed to move on, and this was her final step in letting go of the past.

Jared was wonderful and patient. He was a stable, fun-loving guy. Easy. He'd never hurt her, but he'd also never fully understand her either.

Nobody would but him.

No! That was it! She was done with this wallowing. Alice had once said the best way to get over someone was to get under someone else.

It was New Year's Eve. That seemed like a romantic enough time to do it, right?

Bella purchased the ice cream and condoms. The clerk gave her a smirk as she stumbled back to Jared's apartment, a little jaded but a woman on a mission.

Right after grilled cheese, and before ice cream sundaes, Bella straddled Jared on the couch, made a tad bit roughly, but with purpose.

He was surprised, his face showing a shocked expression, but happy by this turn of events. Jared could see himself having a future with Bella, but he knew she had something that was holding her back from committing to him. He took this as a good sign that they might finally be on the same page.

Not letting the opportunity pass him by, Jared kissed her passionately. Things progressed beyond that, and Bella and Jared consummated their relationship that fateful New Year's. Too bad for Jared that he was wrong about this being the start of something long-term for them because Bella broke it off two days later.

The one thought that ran through Bella's head that evening and for weeks after was why did she feel like she was cheating on him?


"Bella!" Peter waved his hand in front of her. "Earth to Bella."

Bella's eyes widened, shaking herself out of her reflection on the past. She had to stop doing that, but being in the moment was hard for Bella.

It appeared that at this moment in Bella's life, it was like two pages were stuck together. Her past and her future glued together with no space for the here and now. However, there was no avoiding the present, not when it stood in front of her, demanding her attention. Too bad, she was still in delusion.

"Sure," she murmured softly, so softly Peter couldn't make out what she'd said. "Sure," Bella repeated louder, with purpose.

Peter grabbed her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. "Thank you." He leaned in to kiss her on the lips, but Bella turned her face at the last second. When Peter pulled back and stared at her with a questioning look, she glanced around as if to blame her refusal on her dislike of public displays of affection.

As if that was her only hindrance…


Embry barked and chewed an empty toilet paper roll between his teeth. The previous contents of the roll were strewn all over the apartment. Having littered the apartment with shreds of toilet paper, the dog settled on the couch on top of Edward's fresh from the dry cleaners suit jacket.

Edward was in the shower while all this was transpiring, oblivious to the mess that awaited him when he emerged. The water fell over him in rivulets, and he threw his head back as he shampooed his locks. While Edward didn't work out religiously, due to his hectic work schedule, he tried to eat clean enough to maintain the toned body he had gotten in his late teens.

He grabbed some more soap from the pump dispenser and massaged it over his stomach, working his way lower and lower. After this past week, Edward definitely had some pent-up tension he could use help relieving.

He grabbed his cock, taking it roughly into his palm, stroking it a few times. Like so many times since he'd reached puberty, Edward fantasized about Bella. Her legs, her breasts, her ass, even her smell.

But unlike all those times before, he couldn't get the look of despair out of his head. Edward felt a sharp tug, and not in the place he wanted. After she'd ran away from him all those years ago, it took some time before he worked up the courage, so to speak, to use Bella as inspiration again. He thought about random women from movies and magazines, searching for something to bring him the same satisfaction, but none of them did the trick. There was no denying that to Edward, she was sexier than any porn.

This time was different, though. She was no longer some obscure fantasy, a memory from the past. She was real and even more beautiful than before. But her anger and the look of disgust and disappointment in her eyes was different. It all felt different. That slap was different. She was different.

It felt wrong to use her image to get off when he didn't know anything about who she was these days. Not when she so obviously despised him. Edward groaned, throwing his head back in annoyance instead of ecstasy. He released his grip on himself and turned the water all the way to cold. He'd just have to find another way to relieve some of this tension. Maybe a trip to the gym would do the trick.

When his body started to tremble from the frigid water, he shut it off, stepping out into the bathroom. As he grabbed a towel from the rack, his phone started ringing. He sighed, displeased that his few moments of peace were being interrupted. He braced himself and decided if it was Ted inviting him to dinner with Alistair, or worse Tanya, he was going to ignore it. He looked down at the screen and saw Emmett's name pop up. He found this to be weird, since he should be with Rosalie, celebrating her article or some shit.

"Hello?" Edward answered, curious what Em wanted. He also hoped Rosalie didn't tell him about their little talk. While it would just backfire for her, Edward wasn't in the mood to deal with anything else this evening.

"Yo, Ed, did you go into the office earlier?" Emmett boomed from the speakerphone.

Edward was puzzled. Emmett called to talk about work? On his day off? Seriously? He really was living in the Twilight Zone.

"Yeah…why?" Edward prodded, removing the towel from around his waist to dry his hair.

He exited the bathroom, phone in hand, and walked into his bedroom, grabbing a clean pair of boxers and a t-shirt. Edward stood by the edge of the bed and began dressing.

"I meant to tell you something yesterday, and I can't remember for the life of me what it was. Fuck, don't you hate when that happens. I always do this shit. I almost forgot about me and Rosie's month-a-versy last month. Thank god I remembered or it would have been a fucking shit show," Emmett rambled. The connection kept going in and out, so Edward figured he must be on the train.

"Emmett, so you don't remember but chose to call me anyways?" Edward double checked that he was understanding what Em had said. What a jackass.

"Well, yeah, I thought it would jog my memory and all. Whatever, man, you seem like you're in a pissy mood. I gotta go anyway. I'm almost at the restaurant. Can you believe my Rosie is going to be in the newspaper?" Emmett droned on.

Edward grabbed the phone and took it off speaker, placing it against his ear, since he'd finished getting dressed. He walked out of the bedroom to find his living room in complete disarray. "Shit. Em, I gotta go. There's toilet paper everywhere."

"God, man if you had the shits, just say so. And don't you dare say it was because of Rosie's food!"

With that said, Edward hung up and began cleaning up after his dog. Finally, a mess not of his own making.


Bella sat on the train, clutching the bag over her shoulder. She really should have stopped home to drop off her art, but she couldn't chance running into Alice and her asking where she was going.

She looked around, surprised that there were a lot more people headed to where she was going than she'd anticipated. Not having the desire to speculate their reasons, Bella directed her attention to outside the window, watching as everything rushed past her at lightspeed.

Time passed quickly, and it felt like it could have been only five minutes instead of the thirty minutes it took, before the train stopped at the station, breaking Bella out of her daze. Looking up at the sign ahead, Bella adjusted her belongings and made her way out of the station.

This walk was one she hadn't done in a long time, but there were just some sentiments ingrained into so deeply that no matter how long it's been since you've done them, they're just like second nature.

She trekked along, huffing a little due to the weight of her bags as well as her lack of a routine exercise regime. The city didn't have hills like this one, so she had been spoiled by flat ground and sewer smells.

Bella stared straight ahead, her breath catching in the back of her throat. She couldn't look over to her left, not ready to stir up those memories. Quickly making her way past her demons, she treaded lightly in this next part of town, knowing she had no business being here, especially at night. It was a dangerous and impulsive decision, but she had to make peace with this portion of her life. She needed some closure. Something she never really was afforded before.

Distant memories hit Bella like a ton of bricks as she walked through her old stomping grounds.

Passing all the places she and he had frequented, she allowed the scenes to play out in her head like an old movie reel. The spot where they had their first kiss. It was now condos but still she could picture it as it once was. Where she face-planted when he tried to teach her how to skateboard. Where they had their first real make out session. Where they would go on "dates." Where she loved him so. A lifetime of history and nothing to show for it. Nothing but pain and sorrow.

But this journey to Jersey wasn't about him, or her for that matter. It was about closure for someone who deserved to have at least one person mourn them..

Of course, it was less than ideal to be here under these circumstances though.

The underpass.

A place that held so many memories. How many people could say that about a metal tunnel?

Bella paused as scenes of her and Edward as two clueless kids came back to her. He gave her her first cell phone here. This was their meeting spot, the halfway point, after he got adopted. She closed her eyes tightly. Shaking her head, she willed the memories to leave her alone. Bella opened her eyes, squinting in the darkness. She walked to where she remembered Billy had set up his tent. And where Embry hung out. She wished that she knew what happened to that sweet dog.

Bella reached into her bag and pulled out the flowers she'd purchased at the corner stand before she hopped on the train.

She crouched down, laying them on the ground, an empty feeling in her chest, making her realize she hadn't known what she expected to feel when she'd decided to come here.

A ghost wasn't going to appear and tell her everything was going to be okay. Billy was dead, and nothing she did could make him return. But she was grateful that she finally got to say a proper goodbye to a loved one. That she could make peace with the loss and find her closure.

Bella jumped as she heard rustling behind her. She reached into her pocket, grabbing the pepper spray that Alice had given her when she'd first moved in. She insisted that there were too many weirdos in New York for Bella to be unprepared and unprotected.

Bella made a move to walk back toward the train station when something, or rather someone, grabbed her arm.

"Ahh." She yelled out, trying to straighten the nozzle on the can of pepper spray.

The streetlight shone brightly above her, and Bella got a closer look at her would-be assailant.

"Charlie!" Bella shouted, hitting the arm of the girl who was once her sister, and moved to hug her.

"Ow, god, you really have gotten violent!" Charlie remarked, smirking as they embraced. Always so damned smug.

"Oh my goodness. How are you?" Bella squeezed her before releasing her from her hold. She assessed how much older she looked from the last time she'd seen her, but how there was still a familiarity there. She was still her favorite pain in the ass. "What are you doing here alone so late at night?"

"I'm just dandy. And it's not that late, Mom. Besides, I'm not alone. I'm hanging with my…friend, Tyler." Charlie looked over her shoulder, and Bella followed her gaze, spotting a few feet away an older guy, with a five o'clock shadow and a scowl on his face.

"Friend, huh?" Bella raised her eyebrows and shook her head, pulling crazy Charlie into her arms again. "Oh and what did you mean when you said I 'really have gotten violent'?"

Charlie shuffled her feet and grimaced, not expecting Bella to pick up on her choice of words. "Oh you know, nothing! You just were never violent before." Charlie chewed on her bottom lip, hoping Bella dropped the subject.

Bella pursed her lips, not buying Charlie's explanation. "Charlotte! I know you well enough to know you're full of shit."

"Well about that. Edward might have let it slip that you slapped him at your big reunion fiasco at that fancy restaurant," Charlie blurted, smiling nervously, waiting for Bella's reaction.

Bella was stunned. She hadn't realized that Charlie and Edward had kept in contact and were close enough where he would share details of their sordid reunion with her. She was surprised he was speaking about her at all. Let alone venting about her slap.

It was Bella's turn to be embarrassed. "Not one of my finest moments," Bella said sheepishly, chewing on her fingernails as she glanced back at Tyler, who didn't look happy about the two girls speaking.

"Edward deserved it! I'm totally Team Bella, babe," Charlie said flippantly, following Bella's gaze. "Just one more minute, dollface!" Charlie shouted back to her "friend."

"Is he your boy—" Bella started but was cut off.

"I get why you ran away back then. But … I do think you two need to work your shit out. He's miserable without you, and so am I for that matter. You know you left me too, woman," Charlie chastised.

Bella cringed. She had left Charlie behind. At the time, she had been so focused on getting as far away from Edward and his family as possible that she hadn't stopped to think about everything else she'd be leaving. The universe obviously wanted her to have the chance for closure of all sorts. "I'm here now." She touched Charlie's forearm, causing the girl to look at her. There was sadness in her eyes despite the joking manner which she had been speaking.

Charlie smiled softly. "We should go out, maybe next week?" Charlie suggested. "I can meet you in the city? Where do you live?"

Bella took a deep breath. If Bella told Charlie where she lived, there was the chance Charlie may relay that information to Edward, and Bella couldn't allow that to happen. She fiddled with the strap of her bag as she tried to come up with a way to avoid giving away too much of her personal information.

"Or how about we go to an art exhibit or something?" Charlie could sense Bella retreating, so she threw out an artsy thing that Bella might be interested in.

"Sure. That would be great. Does next Saturday work?" Bella didn't have anywhere to be, being unemployed and all.

Charlie nodded and started walking backwards to Tyler before she realized she didn't hug Bella, so she ran back toward her. "I really did miss you!" She squeezed her tight. "Oh wait, do you have a phone?"

Bella nodded, pulling out her cell phone. "What's your number?"

Charlie rattled off her number and Bella told her she'd text her with the details of this art show she'd been wanting to check out, so that she'd have her number as well. They said their goodbyes, and Charlie took off with her "friend" into the night.

Bella shook her head and chuckled when she realized that Edward probably had no idea about this little "friend" Charlie had. He had always been overprotective of Charlie, so there was no way he would have allowed her to continue to hang out with Tyler. What she wouldn't do to see his face when he did find out…

What Bella didn't know was that Charlie's favorite movie was The Parent Trap, and she was about to pull a Lindsay Lohan with these two pathetic souls.


It was a little before ten when Bella finally made it through the door of her apartment.

She turned the knob and said a silent prayer that Alice was either still working or fast asleep.

But luck was never on Bella's side. Alice sat in the armchair with Caius in her lap, her free hand strumming the side table beside her.

"Where have you been, young lady?" Alice interrogated, standing up and lifting Caius into her arms. "I'll have you know I was this close to filing a missing person's report. You had me worried sick. You didn't call me back!"

Bella set down her bags and stretched the stiff muscles in her arms. She'd been carrying her crap all day.

"I'm sorry, Alice. I only just realized the damn thing was on airplane mode. I must have hit something," Bella apologized, looking somber and confused.

"What's wrong?" Alice questioned. She could always read Bella like a book, but in that moment, she had no idea what was troubling her.

"Nothing's wrong, per se. I just had an interesting day." Bella tested the waters, seeing how Alice would take all this news.

"Oh, did you and Peter finally do the deed? If getting to third base was as hot as you said it was, I'm sure the sex was mind-blowing, right? If he didn't make you come, you tell me and I'll loan you my Kama Sutra book. It's been a lifesaver for me." Alice winked, setting Caius down in front of her.

Bella went into the kitchen, looking for a snack and hoping to avoid answering Alice's questions. She pulled out a bag of crackers and shoveled a handful into her mouth.

"So remember my friend Billy that I told you about?" Bella asked, taking more crackers.

"Yes, the one Edward said passed away? Homeless and he had a dog?" Alice inquired, walking over to the counter to grab some crackers for herself.

"Yes, so I went to Jersey to 'pay my respects' where he used to stay. It was just something I needed to do. I figured I could be there and back before you were home from work, but then I ran into Charlie. Do you remember me talking about her? My crazy foster sister?"

Alice nodded repeatedly. "Yes, the ball of energy, real pain in the butt."

Bella gave Alice a knowing look. "It's like having her around when I'm with you."

The two began to bicker, and then Alice remembered an important tidbit of information that she had wanted to share with Bella.

"Oh, while you were on your little trip down memory lane, Rosalie called for you. She refused to give me your check today, and she was acting so strange. I would call her back if I were you. She called twice and even said please. I almost pissed myself and wanted to ask her to repeat it to make sure I was hearing her correctly. I'm sure she probably tried your cell also, but apparently Ms. Airplane Mode wasn't taking calls today." Alice joked, trying to lighten Bella's mood about Rosalie.

Bella couldn't imagine what Rosalie wanted or why she wouldn't give Alice her check. If she was going to withhold her money, she'd have to get a lawyer. Oh wait, lawyers cost money Bella didn't have lying around.

"I'll give her a call tomorrow," Bella resounded, putting the crackers away and walking to her room.

Alice followed behind her, hot on her tail. "No, here, call her now!" She nudged her cell phone to her chest.

Bella hesitated. Today had already been so draining to begin with, she really didn't have the energy to deal with another one of Rosalie's tirades, but she knew Alice wouldn't rest until she called.

"Fine." Bella pressed the number for Rosalie's cell phone, hoping she wasn't calling too late, but then again Rosalie was always at the restaurant.

"Hello?" Rosalie snapped into the speaker. Even over the phone, she was scary.

Alice stood in front of Bella, doing all these theatrics, insisting on Bella putting the call on speakerphone. She waved her off, walking away, and tried to close the door to her bedroom. But Little Miss Crazy wouldn't let that happen.

"Alice said you wanted to speak to me?" Bella prompted, sitting on the edge of her bed, watching Alice do kung fu moves, accidentally kicking Aro as a result.

"Meow." The fluffy orange overweight cat protested at being hit before settling back down and falling asleep.

"Yes, I was thinking that maybe I was too rash the other day. Firing you might have not been the best avenue, especially with our busy season coming up. I'd like for you to come back. I'm confident we can work things out. Maybe we could consider it a provisional period." Rosalie knew Edward wouldn't like that, but she needed to make this believable. She was already being too lenient as it was.

Bella was dumbfounded. Who was this, and what had they done with the real Rosalie?

"Rosalie, I appreciate the offer. I really do, but I think you made the right choice. I need to move on."

Alice shook her head, urging Bella to not be too quick to decline her job back. She silently told Bella to ask for more money. "A raise. Ask for a raise," she mouthed repeatedly, but Bella waved Alice off for the umpteenth time.

"NO!" Rosalie shouted suddenly, alarmed. "I mean, no Bella, that will not work. You've been with the restaurant a while and we value you." It sounded like Rosalie was in pain, saying all this, either that or she was on the toilet.

"'We value you'?" Alice said aloud, forgetting to mouth the words. She put her hand over her mouth when she realized that she said that for all to hear. "Ow!"

Bella swatted her again, moving away from the nut job she lived with. "Rosalie, that's a kind offer, but I don't think it's a good fit."

"Bella, please, name anything you want and it's yours," Rosalie pleaded, her article was on the line after all.

Anything? If Bella did in fact have the upperhand, she was sure going to use it.

"Well, I guess if you put it like that…" Bella began again.