Lynn Sr. Father of the Loud family, tries his best to turn on the stove with the hotdogs on the pan. But every setting has no click to indicate that it's working.
Lynn: Darn it…! The stove isn't working for hotdogs.
Rita: Have you tried using the microwave?
Lynn: I have, honey. But it isn't cooking as fast as it used to. (Shrugs) Now it takes 8 minutes to pop half a popcorn bag.
Rita: Lynn, this isn't good. If we don't cook it soon, our kids will starve. And we all know what happened last time they starved…
Lynn: They're only as loud as our namesake cause of the sugar high, babe. When kids get hungry, they find anything go eat. Gotta be a way to make this work.
Disembodied Voice: Well now there is!
Rita: Huh..? Who said that?
Jack Fenton busting the backdoor down with a mallet: I did! Trust me. Your kids' sugar high will be no more. Jack Fenton over here. Introducing the new patented Fenton Microwave 3000! Designed to cook your stuff faster than anything ever before!
Lynn: Really? (Smiles) How does it work?
Jack Fenton holding his palm out while looking at the camera: First, you give me your money.
Lynn: But...we haven't seen the product ye-
Jack Fenton points his Fenton Thermos at Lynn and Rita while still holding a smile and the microwave on his side.
Lynn: Ok. How much does it cost?
Jack Fenton: As much as you can give me to save yourselves the trouble of floating in an interdimensional environment!
Jack takes out the microwave from the box next to him.
Jack Fenton pushing the other microwave away: Next, replace that old hunk of junk and install the new one. Plug it in, and use any of the settings you want. Some even pre-set like popcorn, pizza, pasta, purple stuff. You name it!
Rita: What's purple stuff?
Jack Fenton: The same substance your baby girl drinks from under the sink.
Rita: WHAT?!
Jack Fenton: Don't worry. With this appliance, you wouldn't wanna have a kid again! But if you do, the microwave comes with a safety function. A Toddler mode.
With the microwave sat down on the floor, Lincoln happily sits in front of his baby sister Lily, who's looking to play.
Jack Fenton: Now your youngin's can enjoy a quick an' fresh meal with a push of a button!
Lincoln: What would you like, sis?
Lily clapping: Pizza.
Instantly, with the press of a button like so, the microwave cooks an entire pizza the size of Lincoln's hand.
Lincoln: Hey, not bad! But it's… Kinda small.
Lily quickly takes the pizza with both hands and shoves it in her throat before munching and swallowing, followed by a masculine burp and a thumbs up with Lincoln.
Jack Fenton: So come on down and get yourselves a Fenton Microwave 3000 today! Only 23.95! And if you order now, we'll give you a small E-Z Bake Oven, absolutely free!
At Jimmy's lab, Sheen, Libby, and Plankton turn on the small pink oven that rattles at first with a pulsating warm green aura. But it quickly stops after 4 seconds.
Sheen raising his hands: Alright!
The oven opens, and a gooey green monster with red eyes roars outside the oven angrily trying to attack everyone before a laser turret descends from the ceiling to shoot the creature into slime, blocking the camera and cutting the feed.
To Order, Call 555-555-GHOST to get a Fenton Microwave 3000
Order in the next 26 milliseconds and get an E-Z Bake Oven Absolutely Free! That's right! FREE!
ORDER NOW!
[Fenton Works is not responsible for loss of organs or brain cells due to purple stuff]
