It had all been going so well, that when the knock back, based on something that happened over twenty years ago continues into a third week, it ignites a fire within Ruth. Harry's hurting, to the point where she's lost count of the times that he's come back in from the garden with an expression of barely contained optimism, having failed to get Graham to either answer his calls or respond to his messages. Worse still, is that he's refusing to talk to her about it. Which in effect means that he's shutting her out.

Desperation and real pain, something which Ruth associates with the pre- Cotterdam them, has seen her taking matters into her own hands. Helped in no small way by Andrew who she's asked, as discreetly as he can, to find out where Graham lives and works. Something he manages to achieve by what means he hasn't told her, but she now knows that Graham lives in a basement flat within walking distance of a charity shop, whose proceeds go to the Greenwich Royal Infirmary. Better still is that Andrew, based on Harry's disappointment which he's assured him isn't anything he should be worrying about, but knows it is, has come on board.

With the help of the one bright light, which is that the documents which will confirm Wes Carter Pearce as their son are ready to be signed. The name chosen by Wes with no input from Ruth, on an evening when Harry had gone to bed early. When Wes, during what had been a real eye opener of a conversation, had amongst other things, told Ruth that Harry had stopped smiling and that was making him sad. Ruth, needing to play it down, had told Wes that Harry was just a bit tired and more importantly it wasn't because of anything he'd said or done.

Documents which of course Andrew could have posted, but has suggested to Harry that he needs to hand over in person. A white lie, which together with Ruth's suggestion that a visit to London to tell Malcolm in person that Harry wants him to be his best man, sees them packing a case for a two night stay in a hotel which overlooks the Thames. Close to Greenwich, Ruth's choice of course, with the advantage that it's a long way from the seat of Government which cuts down on the chances of bumping into anyone from the old days, but is within touching distance of where Graham lives.

.

The hotel, which as their room is on the third floor allows Harry to open the windows, he does before he takes his jacket off. Acutely aware that unlike the sea air which he's grown used to, the air that pervades London is anything but fresh. With the exception of the parks, their happy place he still likes to think of them, where maybe rather than a probably, depending on how much spare time they have, is somewhere he'd like them to go again. That or to go for a walk on Blackheath, which is the nearest open space to the hotel. If for no other reason that he knows he's been giving Ruth a hard time, so needs as well as wants to make it up to her.

Which as they haven't eaten for several hours, he makes a start by ringing reception and booking them a table for lunch.

Pouring them both a glass of water while they wait for their food to arrive and composing his face into one that says we need to talk, 'is it just me, or does it feel odd us being back here?' he asks her.

Yes, is what he expects. 'In what sense odd?' Is what he gets.

'As though we're outsiders.'

'You mean like people who spend their early mornings walking by the sea, the afternoon in their garden and in Wes's words are trying to make babies when they go to bed every night – that sort of odd? I'd say that was refreshing Harry.'

'Yes, you're right,' he tells her, in a voice he hopes she recognises as an apology.

Relief flooding through him when she continues by saying, 'it'll be alright Harry.' Not realising that she's now wondering if she's bitten off more than she can chew by planning to meet Graham on her own.

.

On the pretext of wanting to go shopping, Ruth watches Harry climb into a cab and head off for his meeting with Andrew. The attempted bravado over lunch, not quite hitting the heights she'd hoped it would where Harry is concerned, is now in her case, somewhere between where she's standing and Peru. Short of having a marmalade sandwich under her hat, get a grip she tells herself you can do this. Not before she brushes her hair over vigorously and uses the bathroom for a second time. A quick glance at her phone, tells her that she has half an hour to walk from the hotel to where Graham has his afternoon break in a café close to the hospital. Which means that in theory she ought to be able to enjoy the afternoon sunshine.

Enjoy might be a stretch too far she thinks, when she's approaching the table where the young man who is gazing into the distance, is unmistakeably Harry's son such is the resemblance to his father. Other than by what she can see, which means he's a good deal taller than Harry and certainly more slightly built. Years of drug abuse, she dismisses as soon as it crosses her mind. She's here to discuss the here and now and not what had driven Graham to go off the rails so spectacularly, or is stopping him from reconnecting with his father.

'Is this seat taken?' she asks him. Which is ridiculous and not only because apart from a couple who are sitting far enough away that they won't hear a word that she says, the outdoor seating area is completely empty so she has the pick of the tables.

So is surprised when Graham says, 'help yourself,' rather than something to suggest that he thinks she needs her eyes tested, or worse still is trying to pick him up.

She orders a pot of tea, and when he's asked, by what Ruth takes to be a girl in her late teens, 'if he wants anything else,' and he says, 'another coffee please,' it allows Ruth to have really good look at him. Not though without a sense of guilt that she's here on her own and if this goes spectacularly wrong, not only will she have made it ten times worse, but Harry won't thank her for trying.

Which is why her telling Graham what's been living in her head for days, she saves until their drinks are delivered and having taken a really deep breath says, 'my name's Ruth. I'm a friend of your fathers. Please just hear me out Graham.'

What she says after that, comes tumbling out at such a speed and in such a disjointed manner, that she wonders why he hasn't bolted. Sentences that contain words and statements which include, retirement, seaside, he's called Wes, changed beyond recognition and finally we're getting married next month.

Eventually, 'your teas getting cold,' says Graham, as though he hasn't heard a word she's said, which he clearly has. Buying himself some time and preventing her from responding by looking down at his hands is her best guess.

Until just when she's about to tell him that Harry doesn't know she's here, he says, 'my mother says I'm coward, because I want to meet him, I really do. But just look at me and what I've achieved. It's not as though its earth shattering is it. Working in a charity shop and the odd shift at the hospital as a porter, to pay for a flat the isn't large enough to swing a cat in. When if I had a better track record I could have, I don't know, done something worthwhile.'

'Are you working tonight?' Ruth hears herself asking him. Picturing Harry's response to Graham thinking that when the health service is struggling to recruit staff, that working as a porter isn't a worthwhile job. A young man who she presumes was offered the job when he'd come out of rehab. That and although she wouldn't use the word coward, agrees with his mother who she's never met, or wants to under any circumstances, that he should have responded to his father's numerous calls.

Or is immune from realising that when he says, 'I haven't got a suit, so can we go to The Pig and Whistle in West Street,' he's remembering the man he last saw leaving the family home.

'Seven o'clock,' she suggests, glancing at her watch which tells her that Graham's going to be late back from his tea break. Wanting to hug him and tell him that everything will be alright and that Harry will be just as nervous as he is. Except that's Harry's job she tells herself and is why she just shakes Graham's hand and then watches him walk away.

.

When she opens the door to their room, Harry is lying on the bed fast asleep. The oh so precious envelope on the pillow bedside him and a note that says, care to join me and a couple of kisses.

Which of course she would have done, had he been under the covers and the not so small fact that she isn't immediately able to tell him her news, which is playing havoc with her nervous system. So instead googles The Pig and Whistle. Which if it's as presentable as the reputation suggests it is, means that not only is the food good, but it's comfortable enough that they won't come away thinking that Graham is living from hand to mouth, which is what he'd implied.

Until the moment when Harry wakes up and she becomes the Ruth who used to burst into his office as though the building was on fire, and says, 'I've seen Graham, we're meeting him this evening.'

My Graham? Says Harry's expression. 'What's he like?' He asks her. Which she realises it's Harry's way of saying that he can't find the words to express how he's feeling. Damaged sounding too strong a word, so she goes for the obvious.

'Desperate to meet you. Needing your approval. He said he doesn't own a suit.'

'Graham said that? Is it how he sees me? Ruth am I right in thinking this wasn't a chance meeting?'

'Yes, on all counts,' she tells him, hoping that he won't notice her hands have started to shake. 'But in my defence, I've been worried sick about you Harry. I told him that you didn't wear one either and a whole load of other things, which had I been in his position, I would have run a mile. And I know this sounds crazy, but based on how he reacted, I think he's a lot more worried about how you'll react when he tells you what he's made of his life, than what caused the divorce to happen. That and he looks more like you than I'd imagined him to be, which made it so much easier for me to say what I did.'

Thoughts which Ruth hangs onto, and Harry's hand, when they walk into the pub, where Graham's leaning against the bar with his back to them. A pub which because it's early in the evening, gives Ruth the chance to walk to what is an empty table in the corner and leave Harry to approach Graham on his own.

That Graham has made what her mother would have called an effort, is evident because he's wearing what she imagines to be his best pair of trousers and an open necked shirt which has clearly been ironed. As of course is Harry. To the extent that had they walked in together, there would be no mistaking them to be anything other than father and son. Who after they've ordered their drinks and are walking over towards her and in Harry's case with an expression that tells her he can't believe this is happening, leaves her temporarily wondering what if anything has been said?

Very little as it turns out, but as the evening wears on and as Ruth listens, she understands the depths to which the two of them are prepared to go to rebuild their relationship. Because without beating about the bush and with very little to drink and with no blame being apportioned, the two sides of the divide are edging ever closer together. That and helped by the meal, which Graham insists he pay for and without her needing to kick Harry under the table to stop him insisting he should, he agrees to.

To the extent that when Harry asks Graham, 'if he's working at the weekend?' and Graham says, 'no, but I need to be back by Monday lunchtime,' she finally relaxes. The prospect of seeing Harry, Wes and Graham all under one roof, achieved and with her sanity still intact.

.

The reality of which is even better when they arrive home with an hour to spare. Before Angela who is doing the school run brings Wes home. The quiet, the view of the sea, the completeness that them being here together brings. Sitting in the garden, which at last allows Ruth who had been hanging onto her dreams by her fingernails to breathe normally.

Only to be shot to pieces again, or that's what she imagines. When Wes, who of course as soon as he walks through the door, wants Graham to go for a walk on the beach with him, returns just as she and Harry are serving up dinner. Announcing, that he's told Graham who has gone upstairs, 'that they're trying to make babies.'