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Chapter Sixteen
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Outside, the winds swept the snow around in icy blasts beneath a gray and gloomy sky. The Masen family huddled inside the house around the fireplace, exchanging worried looks abut Alice's deepening cough.
"Yes, I'll marry Jasper," she'd said on the morning after Edward and Bella presented their ultimatum, dabbing at her runny nose with a handkerchief. But their relief at her decision faded quickly as her cold deepened, and soon, there was a heaping basket of soiled handkerchiefs.
Esme made her broths from salted pork bones, and an electuary made from celery seed, pepper, and the last of Bella's honey, but Alice still struggled to breathe. Esme ordered her to stay in bed and kept busy heating bricks to wrap in flannel and slip under the covers with Alice to keep her warm.
Jasper tried to visit her when he heard that Alice was sick, but Bella stood in the door and refused to allow him inside. "There's no sense in spreading this further," she said. "I'll tell her you were here. 'Twill make her smile."
"It might make her smile more to see me," Jasper said. His pout and pleading eyes reminded Bella of those plump black and white bears in the land of Cathay, and she struggled not to smile.
"Mayhap," Bella agreed, "but it's not worth the risk of you falling ill as well. Go home, Jasper. Light a -" Bella stopped and bit the inside of her lip. She'd almost told him to light a candle for Alice, but these people rejected such "popish" ideas. "Go home and say a prayer for her."
"This is for her," Jasper said shyly and pressed a small piece of paper into Bella's hand. As he waded away through the snow, Bella peeked at it. The scrap was small, obviously torn from the edge of a document because paper in the colony was a rarity, but on it he had drawn a sketch of a couple holding hands. He wasn't skilled, but he had obviously put a lot of care into it. Bella smiled as she went back inside to take it upstairs to Alice.
About a week after Alice agreed to marry Jasper, Esme woke Bella in the night with a gentle shake. Bella sat up, adjusting the nightcap that had been rumpled askew in the night and was covering one of her eyes. "What is it?"
"It's Alice." Esme's eyes glimmered in the light of the candle she held. Her hand shook, dripping wax down its stem.
Bella tossed back the covers and slid from the bed. "How bad?"
"She's drenched with sweat and I cannot get a sensible word from her."
Bella shrugged into her nightgown and tied the belt as she hurried after Esme. Carlisle stood at the top of the stairs, fully dressed. "I'm going now to fetch Doctor Fuller."
"Be safe." Esme pressed a quick kiss to his lips, and he stroked her cheek as he drew away.
Bella climbed the ladder to the attic, holding up the hem of her skirts with one hand. Alice's makeshift room was icy cold and dark except for the single lamp that hung from a hook in the ceiling. "Light a brazier," Bella told Esme, "It's far too cold in here for one who is ill. Bring some more lights. Wake Edward, please."
Alice's skin was flushed and her hair was soaked with sweat. Esme had a bowl of cold water on the floor with a cloth. Bella wrung it out and laid it on Alice's forehead. Alice let out a soft sigh, but went back to her muttering, her head jerking a bit from side to side as though she wanted to toss but lacked the energy. She tried to cough, but it just came out in small, cracked gasps.
Bella pushed aside a piece of hair stuck to Alice's cheek and when her skin touched Alice's, her mind flooded with images, much as it did when she touched Emmett or Rose. The mental wall behind which adult minds were concealed from her had weakened in Alice's delirium, and Bella saw for a moment through Alice's eyes. Felt the deep love she had for her family and the people of her colony, and her earnest desire to share her peace and happiness she'd found through her faith. She saw Jasper for a moment, blond hair peeking from below the brim of his cap, and that special light in his eyes that made Alice's heart beat faster.
She took her hand away, for Alice was not sharing these thoughts willingly. Still, the glimpse into her sister-in-law's mind had helped Bella understand her a little better. She pulled the quilts up closer to Alice's chin, and straightened her night cap. Alice and Jasper would have a good life together, but first Bella had to help Alice get well.
Bella tried to recall the herbs she had used when Ward was sick with the Sweat, but she had none of them in the house, and she didn't know of an herb woman in Plymouth. She wrung out the cloth and replaced it on Alice's forehead, smoothing back the pieces of hair that had stuck to her sweaty skin.
Humans were so fragile. Her own family had been blessed by good health, but she had seen how thin the thread was that tethered humans to this earth. She pushed away the grim thoughts. It could not be Alice's fate to die before she and Jasper had a chance at happiness. It simply could not.
Edward came into the room, shoving his arms through the sleeves of his doublet. His hair stood in rusty spikes, and his eyes were bleary with sleep. He knelt beside Bella.
"How bad?" he asked her.
"I don't know," Bella said honestly. "Bad enough. Edward, do you remember when Ward -"
But Esme had come back into the room, lugging the brazier under one arm, and a bag of charcoal under the other. Candles had been hastily shoved into one of her pockets. Edward hurried over to help her, setting up the brazier on its brass stand. A metal bowl that held the was mounted on top of the stand, and a cover of arabesque-style metalwork would be put over the top of it once the fire was going.
"Do you know Dr. Fuller well?" Bella asked Esme.
"He was one of those on the first ship," Esme said. Edward clicked flint against the rough steel blade and a shower of sparks shot at the pile of fluffy tinder. Esme blew softly on the on it as smoke curled, and a little flame sprang up. "He studied medicine during the voyage, for he knew we would not have a physician among us."
Bella bit the inside of her lip. "So he has not been a doctor for very long?"
"Have no fear, Bella. He's quite good. Governor Bradford even sent him to Weymouth to tend the ill when they had their epidemic."
He might be skilled, but Bella had little faith in human medicine. Queen Mary had the best physicians her riches could buy, but they only seemed to make her illness worse. But Bella was no longer the duchess, who could imperiously order a physician to leave, and she didn't think anyone would understand her objections, especially when she had no alternative to offer.
"I'll get more water," Bella murmured, and took the bowl with her when she left the room. She went downstairs to the bucket they kept by the fireplace to keep it from freezing and poured some into the basin. She and stared down into it for a moment. If only she could give Alice a cool bath in a tub. But they didn't have a tub large enough to submerge her and the house was so cold that it might do more harm than good. Perhaps some cool towels -
The door opened with a swirl of snow and Carlisle led the doctor in. He was an older man, perhaps in his fifties. His face was craggy and his hair sparse where wisps of it peeked from beneath the brim of his hat. He and Bella exchanged polite greetings, and Bella carried up the bowl of water behind the men as they headed upstairs to Alice's room.
"They're here." The relief in Esme's voice was almost palpable. She stood up from where she'd been kneeling beside Alice and stepped back to give Dr. Fuller access to her.
Doctor Fuller knelt down beside Alice and touched the back of his fingers to her cheek. He immediately went for the bag he was carrying, and rooted around inside it for a moment. "Mistress Masen, if you'd bring that basin closer, please?"
He withdrew a small brass implement and and with a flick of a silver blade, he cut into the soft flesh inside Alice's elbow. Bella drew in a sharp breath, and Fuller took the basin from her hand to hold under the streaming wound. Blood pattered into the water, clouding it with swirls of red. The smell of blood made Bella gag and she raised her hand to shield her nose, but of course the humans couldn't smell it. Edward noticed her distress and edged closer to her to take her other hand in his.
Fuller held a small glass cup over a candle and then quickly laid it on her arm to draw out the blood with suction as it cooled. While the blood was being drawn, he emptied the contents of several pouches into his mortar and ground them into a powder. "A purgative," he announced, handing the mixture to Esme in a bowl. "Twice a day. More if the fever increases."
By the time he had finished bleeding her, Alice's face was nearly as white as the linens below her and her lips had a grayish tinge, but the doctor touched her forehead and announced with relief that she was cooler.
Bella didn't understand human medicine. How was giving an emetic to a person weak with fever going to make them better? She waited until the doctor had gone and Esme was downstairs, warming water to give Alice the medicine. She murmured her question to Edward as he checked the bandage on Alice's arm to make sure the bleeding had stopped.
"It's to purge her of the foul humours making her ill," Edward said. "In a few days, Alice will be back on her feet again."
" 'Twill only make her weaker," Bella insisted.
"Fret not." Edward gave his wife a kiss and a smile. "Doctor Fuller has seen this illness often, and he knows what he's doing."
Bella bit her lip. Outside, the wind rattled the shutters and the candles around them fluttered in the drafts. She had her own howling storm inside her, of despair and hopelessness.
Every day, the doctor came by to bleed Alice again, and every time, Alice seemed weaker after he had gone. Esme had to force the purgatives into her and they came right back up, along with whatever tiny bits of broth they'd managed to get into her.
"She isn't getting better," Bella said on the fifth morning. "She's getting worse."
"I know." Edward's face was etched with grief, as though he had already accepted Alice would die. He looked down at his sister as Bella bathed her face with warm water. The doctor had forbidden them to use cold, or to wash any part of Alice that was under the covers. They were supposed to take special care when lifting the blankets not to let any air in, which made taking care of her very difficult, but Esme tried to follow Doctor Fuller's directions to the letter.
Carlisle was sitting on a chair in the corner, his forehead in his hands as he prayed, but his face looked the same, a horrible resignation. She had caught him weeping earlier, standing down by the fireplace as his frame shook with sobs. Bella had simply taken him into her arms and let him cry.
Esme was sitting on a cushion beside him, knitting. There was nothing else she could do, but in her frustration, she had to keep busy, and so she was knitting Alice thick new stockings to keep her legs warm.
"We can't let this continue." Bella thought of Ward, and that he would have died if she had let the doctors have their way when he had the Sweat.
Bella went over to crouch down beside Esme. "Esme, I need willow bark. Do you know of anyone here in the village who might have any feverfew, elderberry, or raspberry leaves?"
Esme shook her head. "I wouldn't know of anyone who would have such things. We have a doctor and no need of such... old things."
Herb women were looked upon with some mistrust under the old ways, and weren't much respected by this new faith, either.
"Edward, can you come downstairs, please?"
He followed her as she asked and went to warm his hands in front of the fire. "What is it, love?"
"She'll die if I don't do something." Bella clasped his hands in her own. "I can try to treat her without the purgatives and bleeding."
"How?"
"I know of herbs that can help with the fever, if only I can get a supply of them."
"Herbs?" His brow wrinkled. "Bella, that doesn't seem like real medicine."
"I know, but it's how I saved our baby when he had the Sweat. I know you don't remember the children -"
He looked down. She knew that bothered him. She touched him under the chin until he lifted his eyes to hers once more.
"But you must trust me on this. She will die if we keep this up. I need you to allow me to try to save her."
He hesitated for only a moment, and then nodded. "I do trust you."
"Can you convince Carlisle and Esme for me?"
"I can try. But what will you do? Where will you get the herbs you need?"
She took a deep breath. "I have to find Jacob's people. It's her only hope."
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Edward wound a scarf around Bella's neck. He knew she didn't need it, but he couldn't help it. He couldn't send her out into the blizzard without some protection. He couldn't believe he was doing this. It seemed so reckless, so foolhardy, all for something he wasn't sure would work.
"They've been gone for such a long while. Surely, they're far from here by now. How can you hope to find them?"
Bella smiled up at him, her huge, dark eyes shining with love. "I can. Trust me."
"I do, but ... I worry."
"I know. But I must do this. They're the only ones I know of who might have what we need."
"Mayhap. But will they help us, given what has happened?"
Bella paused in changing her clothes. "I cannot say. Jacob was always kind to me. Perhaps I can convince him. I must try, Edward. It's the only hope we have."
She put on a pair of his breeches. On Edward, they reached his knees, but on Bella, they went down to her ankles. His shirt enveloped her and she had to tie it in a knot at her hip where the excess fabric trailed down. She looked ridiculous, almost as comical as she had that day at Tilbury, wearing an antique set of mismatched armor.
"No shoes?" Edward asked. He wanted to cup her little pink toes in his hands to warm them already. They looked so cold against the wood floorboards. He couldn't imagine them in the snow. It made him wince.
"I'll just lose them," she said. "But I'm taking some in my pack for when I return."
He helped her braid her hair into a thick rope that hung down her back. He held onto it for a moment, wrapping it around his wrist, as though his grip could keep her with him. The words were hard to force out of his tight throat. "Come back to me."
"Always," she promised. "For a thousand years, and a thousand more."
He bent and kissed her, passion, longing and love in every brush of their lips and tangle of tongues. Her hands threaded through his hair and knocked his hat to the floor as they clung together. She drew back and pecked one last kiss onto his lips before turning and darting away, out the door into the dark gloom of the snowstorm.
Edward stood by the door for a moment, watching the swirl of snowflakes against the dark sky and then he closed the door.
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Bella ran darting through the trees, moving so fast her feet barely left tracks in the snow. Hours and miles passed, and she did not slow, pushing herself to her very limits. She knew Alice was running out of time, moving ever closer to breaking that fragile thread.
Bella jumped, catching a high branch of a tree and climbed to its top that arched above the forest's canopy. She scanned the horizon or traces of smoke before dropping back down to the forest floor. She headed northwest, deep into the massive forest where no settler had ever traveled. It was known only to the first people who had lived in this land.
She passed long abandoned villages, their wood houses collapsing into sad piles of wreckage. Here and there bones lay where none of their kin had survived to bury them, dead of the horrific smallpox epidemic that had swept through this land. Bella had seen glimpses of them in Jacob's memories, but nothing could prepare her for the desolate reality. The soft silence of snow fell on the motionless remains of what had once been a bustling village, but now the fields around it were grown up with brush.
Bella ran on as the hours passed, encountering no living creature but a startled deer. The darkness began to give way to the pale light of dawn. She climbed a tall oak and saw the edge of the sun break the horizon, the orange and pink streaks of light against the clouds, pushing back the dark blue of night. She was struck by its beauty, the brilliant bursts of color where darkness had reigned only moments before. Even with all of the suffering, loss, and anguish of life, there was still such beauty in the world.
She tilted her face into the breeze, inhaling deeply. There! A faint wisp of smoke came to her nostrils. Hope made her heart speed up, but she cautioned herself it was unlikely to be Jacob. But if she had encountered a group of people, it might mean he was close.
Bella kept running and the scent of smoke became stronger. Finally, she saw the light. It guided her to a small camp site in a little clearing. She crept closer, peeking from behind a tree. A hunting party of four men huddled around a fire, their hands extended toward its warmth. She could just make out their figures at this distance, not their faces. They were chatting, laughing. Bella stepped out from between the trees with deliberately heavy steps.
The men heard her and turned to face her in a unanimous motion. In that moment, they saw only her pale skin and her male attire, she knew. The figure of an enemy.
She heard them shout, but did not know the words they were saying. The men didn't pick up the bows and knives that rested at their sides. They charged toward her, and their bodies seemed to explode, morphing into huge wolves that lunged over the fallen logs in the clearing, their lips pulled back from their teeth in enraged snarls.
But when they caught her scent, they arrested their forward motion, skidding to a halt in the snow in front of her. Their heads tossed in confusion, and the wolf on the far right pawed at the side of his snout as the unusual scent of selkie tingled in his nostrils.
The rusty brown wolf to the right of the leader stepped forward, dipping his head low. He extended a paw to touch her bare foot, and her mind flooded with his thoughts. Her mind recognized his, and she nearly wept in relief. Jacob, I've found you.
In his wolf form, his thoughts focused on his senses, the rich data he gleaned from the scents around them, the tiny sounds made by the woodland creatures as they scurried beneath the cover of the snow, and then her confusing presence, a jarring anomaly their sensory data couldn't classify. She was natural, yet unnatural.
Sea Woman, what are you doing here?
Faintly, Bella could hear the thoughts of his packmates, linked as they were in this form. Was she a goddess in their midst to be worshipped, or a demon to be feared and combatted? She looked and dressed like the English who had driven them from their homeland, yet her scent was not human. She smells like the sea, one of them thought, and his memories of it were tinged with longing.
I've come because I need your help, Bella thought.
She could feel the jolt of anger, of indignation that went through Jacob, the remnants of the pain that had driven them from their homeland. He tossed his massive head and the huff of breath he let out blew back the tendrils of hair that had escaped her braid and fluttered her clothes. You come to ask for our help when we have been exiled from our homes? We left behind our lands, our ancestor's graves, because of your people.
You know that I would have prevented it if I could. I tried. I tried, but I wasn't fast enough to stop it.
But you are with them - the invaders. You have bound yourself to them and their ways.
I would love him no matter what form he took. He could have been one of you. He could have been born in the Summer Lands or in the land of the ever-frost. He could have been born of any people and my passion for him would not change.
Jacob let out a soft whine and lowered his head. His amber eyes bored into hers. I knew you ... before.
It wasn't really a statement, or a question. It was somewhere in between. it was something that he knew, yet needed confirmed. She saw his faint memories, glimpses of an enmity between them he did not understand, but regretted.
You did. Bella reached up to lay a hand against his brow, rubbing her thumb over the silky fur between his eyes.
I must ask you something. I had a dream. A dream I did not understand. In this dream, I stood in front of a crowd with burning hate in my soul. I do not understand the words I spoke, but I know they were meant to harm you. I saw the fear in your eyes.
Bella took a deep breath and exhaled it in a soft white cloud. Truth was supposed to be a good thing, a pure and clean thing. But sometimes truth was painful. Yes, this happened. You were once my enemy. But we have shown that those who were once enemies can now be friends. I deeply regret what happened between our peoples, and I wish nothing more than there could be peace and friendship between us.
The other wolves were edging closer sniffing at her. She felt their curiosity, their minds lightly touching hers, trying to understand what she was, still unsure of whether she represented a threat.
Are we being punished in some way because of what I did before?
No. Bella shook her head. Your sins are your own, not visited upon your people.
Am I to atone by helping you? Is that what this is about?
Bella wanted to say "yes," because she needed his help so badly, but that was not her way. I do not believe that's the way it works. It is your choice in this life whether to help me or not. I will not claim a debt from another time. I ask you for help now, and you must decide whether to offer it. That is all.
A wolf with dark fur stepped forward and he touched his nose to Bella's arm. Leave this place, Sea Woman. We want nothing to do with the English, those who have taken everything from us. We extended our hand to their kind once before, and we were repaid in blood and bitter ashes. For the friendship Jacob bears you, we will not harm you now, but you will leave our lands, or I will not answer for the consequences.
Jacob let out a growl. No! There will be no threats of violence toward one who comes seeking our aid. We do not harm women, even those bound to the English. That is not our way.
They snarled at one another for a moment, and though Bella didn't fully understand the train of their thoughts, it seemed to be a battle for dominance based on bloodlines. Jacob finally won out and the darker wolf hunched his shoulders and gave the underside of Jacob's chin a lick before he stepped back.
I did not mean to cause strife among you, Bella thought when Jacob put his paw against her foot again.
Jacob gave a soft huff. The deaths in our community have left a gap in our leadership. But this is not your concern. Tell me what it is you need.
There is one I love as a sister who is ill. I need medicine for her. Fever and weakness. The English medicine has nearly killed her.
Jacob shuffled on his paws for a moment. I will take you to my wife. She will give you what you need.
Two of the wolves gave sharp yips of protest, and Bella heard a jumble of voices in her head.
I give my own personal property. Jacob's voice rang out louder than the others and the tumult quieted. I give only what is mine to do with as I wish.
Jacob turned his attention back to Bella. Despite what you say, I feel I must do this to atone for the evils I have done you in the past. If it were this life only - Jacob stopped for a moment and looked away. After a moment, he shuffled closer to Bella and crouched down. Climb on my back.
Bella had to give a little jump, because his back was as high as a horse. She gripped the soft tufts of fur at the base of his neck and leaned forward to brace herself as he burst into a run. The other wolves followed, their paws churning the snow.
They approached a village, a busy place where numerous people, bundled up in fur-lined doeskin tunics and trousers, were building up the fires to prepare breakfast. They didn't seem surprised to see a pack of giant wolves trotting into their midst, but the sight of Bella on Jacob's back did draw stares. When he came to a halt, she slid down to the ground, and by the time her feet touched the earth, he had changed back into a man and was pulling on a tunic he had carried strapped to one leg.
He said a word and gestured for her to follow. Bella trailed behind him through the village, and noted that it was larger than the ones she'd seen before. Jacob's group must have merged with another. He stopped in front of one of the houses and drew back the heavy leather tarp that covered the door and stuck his head inside. A soft female voice greeted him, and there was a short conversation before Jacob drew Bella inside.
It was warm inside, brightened by a fire. Its smoke escaped through a hole in the roof, but the thick walls held in the heat quite well. A bed covered in furs was nestled up against one of the walls, and the other wall was lined with stacks of baskets, but what drew Bella's attention was the bundles of herbs tied to racks hanging against the wall.
A young woman was seated near the fire. Bella had seen her in Jacob's mind before. She gave the woman a small smile, she did not smile back.
Jacob said something to her and the woman replied with short words and a shake of her head. His voice turned to pleading, then cajoling, and the stubborn set of the woman's jaw softened. She finally nodded and got to her feet. She went to the rack and began to pluck bunches of herbs from it.
Jacob touched Bella's arm. Despite what I said to the others, the herbs are not my property. They belong to my wife, and I had to convince her to share them with you.
The woman wasn't entirely happy with the situation when she handed over the herbs, holding each up and giving an explanation of how to use it, which Jacob translated mentally to Bella. She stuffed them into a doeskin bag and held it out to Bella.
Bella took it and inclined her head. Tell her, please, that she has just given me back the life of my sister, and I will always be grateful.
I will tell her. Go now. Jacob gave Bella's arm a small squeeze. I once tried to take life from you, and now I restore it.
Your debt is paid, Bella thought, because she was sure that was what he needed to hear. Jacob gave a soft smile.
She turned and left the house and walked through the village, hearing the whispers all around her. A child saw her and recoiled, and Bella wanted to stop and comfort him, to let him know not all of the pale-skinned strangers were enemies, but she knew it would do no good. Scars ran deep here. Bella could only hope relations between their peoples would improve in the future. There could be peace between them, and Bella vowed to do her utmost to see that happen.
Once she had reached the treeline, Bella started running, putting on her full speed toward the south and Plimouth Colony.
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Notes:
- An electuary is medicine in honey or sugared wine.
- Doctor Samuel Fuller did serve as Plymouth's only doctor for the first few years of the colony. He was sent to Salem (not Weymouth, as I've written in this story) in 1629, when they were dealing with illness and confusion over how to organize their church structure. Dr. Fuller helped with both. Governor Endicott wrote a letter of appreciation to Bradford for his "kind love and care" in sending Fuller. Fuller continued to work as a physician and surgeon for the rest of his life, dying in Plymouth in 1633. The location of his grave - as with many of the early settlers - is unknown.
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Special Author's Note:
My short story "The Golden Arrow and the Butterfly" is free until 2/15/15 on iTunes and the TWCS Publishing House website. Enjoy a little Valentine's Day gift. :)
