Mei wandered the dead silent halls leading up to the chairman's office. Everyone was supposed to have left the building ten minutes ago. Years of instinct screamed at her to follow the rules. The scream was muffled, as if behind a locked door. Why should she listen to it? She liked the silence here.

Mei opened the door to the chairman's office. Everything was dark. It looked like a dull barren crypt.


Six Years Ago

Mei ran into the office, her face beaming at the furniture. The desk was huge and the chair at it looked like a throne to her. Plenty of grandpa's unfinished work was still scattered across it. A photo of Mei, her dad, and her grandpa stood at the corner. She was so proud to be in a picture with two extremely dedicated people.

Her father walked in behind her and opened the blinds and windows, letting the bright sunlight in, as well as a nice cool breeze.

Mei picked up a paper from the desk, eager to see what kind of stuff grandpa was working on.

"Now, now, Mei," her dad said. "Don't get grandfather's work all messy." He came over and lifted the paper out of her hands.

Mei pouted. "Hmph, I know. An Aihara always puts orderliness over personal curiosity." Mei used a mocking tone, repeating words she'd heard her dad say a million times. She badly wanted to follow through with her family's legacy. Sometimes she felt like the strictness was just keeping her away from running alongside them. However, she stomached her frustration. The strictness was what she was supposed to admire so much; she wanted to be just like her father when she grew up. Her visit to the office wasn't supposed to be about fun.

Mei's dad brought her over to a filing cabinet and started telling her about a bunch of different projects the chairman had to work on and the daily chores it required. Mei listened with open ears, fantasizing about a grown-up Mei in the chair. His voice eventually started petering out.

"Is something wrong?" Mei asked, looking up at him. He was standing tall, his hair combed back perfectly, his face regal, but his eyes were distant, gazing out the window.

"It's nothing," he said. "This is what an Aihara is supposed to do." His voice was shallow, as if he were saying it to himself.

Mei gazed up at him, confused. He'd always seemed so confident. Did he doubt himself? Mei shook off the thought.

I'll love him no matter what!


Today

Her father was never the person she admired so much. He always gazed out that window, wishing he could escape the Aihara legacy. She'd been trying to emulate a mask that her father, himself, resented.

Mei breezed her fingers across the chairman's desk and then picked up the photograph of her with her father and grandfather. Those expressions on their faces that she'd always seen as determined and dedicated now looked hollow and cruel. The path they laid out for her was a lie. She'd just been imitating someone else; she had no beliefs of her own. She was empty.

"I thought I'd find you here," said a beautifully familiar voice behind her.

Mei turned around and saw Yuzu at the doorway, her blonde hair bright and colorful even in the dimness of the building. Mei's eyes drooped. "What do you want?"

"Papa's leaving tonight," Yuzu said, her words coming out slowly. "We have to go see him off."

"I don't care."

"Mei, he's your dad! Please–"

"Just go away! Both of you! You both already chose to reject me so just go away!" Mei gripped the edge of the desk and chanced a glance at Yuzu. Her expression was confused but piercing.

"We aren't rejecting you! I'm couldn't stand what you did because I hated seeing you treat yourself like a tool! We care about you!"

Mei dug her nails into the table. "He doesn't care about a single damn thing I did for him. Why would he? He never wanted that life. I never wanted it either. I just keep trying to live up to people's expectations, to give them what they want. I thought that was the right thing to do! But no one ever appreciates it! No one will accept me! You had your chance! Go away, Yuzu!"

Yuzu's face was pleading. "When he showed up… I didn't understand him at first either. How could he be out there travelling instead of being with his family? It still makes me mad. But… I do understand one thing. It's unbearably painful to see the people you love hurting themselves for you. That's why I couldn't be with you that night… that's why your dad stopped setting expectations for you. I think he had to go live out his dreams to set both of you free."

"You're saying he abandoned me for my sake?" Mei stared at Yuzu, stunned. This was the first time she let herself get angry at her father for leaving. It was easier to blame herself before. But now… "How can you say that? You're the one who gave me the courage to call him here. All he did was go after his own selfish desires, leaving everything behind! Chasing dreams just means abandoning the people you're supposed to care about!"

Yuzu took a step back and looked down. "I know! I told you I can't stand how his choice ended up hurting you. But the only way we can move on from that pain is by chasing our own dreams, right? My papa went away when I was only three. I only have the vaguest memories of him. Still, to this day, I'm always trying to make him proud by just doing anything and everything that feels right."

Mei released her grip and looked off at the windows, the blinds covering the light. "I'm not like you, Yuzu. I don't have passions to strive for. All this time I've just been imitating a fake dream. I have no beliefs of my own."

Yuzu's face tensed up. Mei made eye contact with her and was overwhelmed by her intense eyes. "No! That's not true at all! I've seen passion in you over and over! Sure, you're always trying to hide it like you think you don't deserve to have passions or something, but I know what I saw! Remember when I had detention in the student council room? You got a report back about one of your requests getting approved. You were blushing like crazy, and your hands were fidgeting through the papers with so much excitement! Up until then I thought you were so perfect, like a robot. But in that moment, I saw that you were just a kid who genuinely cared so much about helping the school!"

Mei shut out the memory of that moment while Yuzu spoke of it. She couldn't believe Yuzu. "You don't know what you're talking about," she said, her voice trembling. "If I looked like that… it was just because I wanted to live up to my father…"

"Even if that's why you were doing it, that's not why you cared so much! The accomplishment was yours and you were proud of yourself! I know what I saw! You can't trick me!"

"Proud of myself?" Mei lifted her hands, staring into her open palms. Those hands that have done so much, suffered so much to achieve so much. But none of it was ever for her. "You're wrong about me, Yuzu. I never fight for myself. I don't care."

"You do care! When I helped you get rid of Mr. Amamiya, you thanked me!"

Mei's hands fell to her side, and she stared at Yuzu, shocked. I… did. I was so grateful. Mei looked to Yuzu's feet. "I was only relieved that I wouldn't be distracted from my work because of that anymore…" Her own words felt like a hollow excuse.

"Wasn't I such a big distraction from work? But you decided to come and live with us, didn't you? You don't know how happy that made me, to see that you really did want to be with us. And then, again, when I was trying to run and hide from you, you went out of your way to get me back! You did that for you, Mei. You're not empty, and deep down, you know it."

Mei clenched her jaw. "That was stupid and selfish. It was wrong!"

"There's nothing wrong about it! You deserve to be rewarded for your efforts! Why else did you agree to go the amusement park? We worked so hard and then we went out and had fun! There's nothing selfish about that!"

"I didn't care about going! I was just appeasing you."

"Maybe that's why you went, but you still had fun when we were there. You looked so nervous after the rollercoaster; I thought it was so cute. And then when I fixed your bear, you looked so happy. It's not like you got Anthoniko for your dad."

Mei bit her lip. "It was for you. I only wanted to win a bear so I could repay you for taking me there."

Yuzu's eyes went wide and then she made one step forward and smiled. "See? You were grateful for me taking you there! You let yourself have fun and you did it for you! Then you summoned up the courage to ask your dad to visit us! You wanted to see him again and that didn't really have anything to do with him being an accomplished responsible man, you just wanted to see your dad again because you love him! It's as simple as that!"

Mei leaned forward and clutched her heart. She remembered looking up at her dad in this very office six years ago. She had looked up at her father and saw the doubts in his eyes, and her only thought was that she loved him… just because he was him.

Mei's heart throbbed in her chest, her eyes burning. She'd wanted so badly to help him, to live up to him, to make him proud. But… beneath all of that was something so simple, something she'd buried deep in her heart so long ago. All her efforts to meet her father's expectations were built on a personal dream, a happiness that came from herself and no one else.

The path she tried to take from her father might have been a lie, a mistake. But the simple fact that she'd cared so much about it proved something.

"You're not empty, Mei."

Mei shut her eyes tight while tears fell down her cheeks.

"You try so hard because you care so much about others and yourself. I know it. You don't need someone to lay out a path for you. You can blaze your own trail!"

Mei's aching eyes shot open, trembling, staring right at Yuzu. "How? How can I do that? I don't know how!"

"I don't think any of us really know. We just have to keep trying. I promise I'll stay right by your side while you figure this out!"

Yuzu's face was so kind, gentle, and pleading. She looked like she was glowing, and Mei could swear that glow was emanating raw unfiltered hope. Mei stopped trembling and her tears stopped falling. She was so lost and unsure of everything. She thought of the promise she made to Yuzu's father. She wanted so badly to trust Yuzu, to believe everything she'd said, to let Yuzu guide her.

"Let's go see papa," Yuzu said, reaching out her hand. "But it's your choice. No one can make it for you."

It wasn't what she wanted to hear. Yuzu never said what Mei wanted to hear. But despite that, Mei leaned forward and took Yuzu's hand without hesitation.


Mei clutched tightly to Yuzu, her arms wrapped around Yuzu as they rode the bike to the metro. Yuzu's belly was rising and falling rapidly, and her back was sweating. The wind made their hair flow wildly.

"Why… why are you doing all this for me?" Mei asked.

"I don't know," Yuzu said through heavy breaths. "I just want to. Badly. Isn't that weird?"

Mei smiled against Yuzu's back. No. I don't think that's weird at all.

The sun was setting, the street zipping by in streaks of warm hues. Was the world always this colorful? She longed to look ahead, but with Yuzu in front, all she could do was look to the side. That was fine. She didn't need to agonize about the path in front just yet. Watching everything fly by so fast right next to her was exhilarating.

I don't know what my purpose is, but as long as I remember this warm feeling within me, I think I can find it.


Mei ran into the metro, Yuzu right at her side. She moved through the crowds of people, scanning over everyone. Yuzu was clearly starting to panic, checking the time on her phone every couple seconds. Mei's heart pounded. The train started coming in, the gust of wind feeling like an omen of failure.

Then, Mei spotted a figure with dark messy hair and an uneven stubble. She leaned forward but then halted. She was still struggling with how much her father had changed. Doubt gnawed at her resolve and a part of her told her to let it go. If she just didn't go see him… then he'd leave thinking that he'd failed, that Mei still wouldn't try finding her own path. She couldn't do that to him.

Mei turned her head to look at Yuzu and Yuzu just smiled at her. She believes in me. She knows I won't falter now.

Mei jogged up to him as the train slowed down. He caught sight of her and turned to her, his eyes wide. She hadn't had a chance to think of what she was going to say, but the words came naturally.

"I'm going to make you proud," Mei said, her head held high. "By blazing my own trail."

Her father smiled. The train stopped and the doors opened.

"I'm already proud. Just because you're you, Mei." He patted her on the head and ruffled her hair, as if she were still a kid. Her father's eyes looked soft and free, but still determined, free of the Aihara pressures but still excited, full of his own ambitions. It was a perfect look on him. This was who her father wanted to be. That was enough. Her heart didn't falter for a second as she watched him step aboard the train. She was grateful to have seen him, and at peace with letting him go, because they finally understood each other.

"Enjoy your travels!" Mei said as the doors started closing, her father smiling kindly. "Follow your dreams! Dad!" He rubbed the back of his neck after hearing that, clearly embarrassed. Mei closed her eyes and smiled. Yes, this was all we needed to be a family again. It was so simple.


Mei followed into the apartment after Yuzu, Yuzu kicking her shoes off and Mei slowly taking hers off.

"Mei!" mother cried and ran up to Mei, hugging her tightly. "We were all so worried about you! Shou was heartbroken when he thought he wouldn't get the chance to see you before he left!"

Mei returned the hug and caught Yuzu smirking at her. Mei frowned back. "I'm fine now, really. I just needed time to think." And to accept a bit of help from someone for once.

Mother pulled back from the hug and then her face lit up with realization. "You still need to open up the gift Shou got you!" Mei blushed. In all the hassle, she completely forgot about it. She thought nothing of it at the time, but now her curiosity was bubbling. Mei followed behind Yuzu and mother as they got to the living room and stood by the large package. Mei knelt and pulled open the bow that held the packaging closed. She slid the bag down and her jaw hung from her face. She was faced with a giant teddy bear, about half as tall as her.

Mother squealed beside her and came down to cuddle her face against the bear. "Oh, Shou, you cutie!" she said. "Who gets a sixteen-year-old a teddy-bear?"

"It was a good idea," Mei said. "I've always loved them."

Yuzu crouched down with the two of them, her face in a wide grin. "Hm, this guy's name shall be–"

"Kumagorou," Mei finished. The two of them stared at her. Mei looked to the floor, blushing. "You got to name the last one, so…"

Mother laughed. "Oh, you two are so adorable! Yuzu, you sleep on the floor from now on. Mei and Kumagorou need the bed to cuddle." Starting to get uncomfortably embarrassed from the jokes, Mei picked up Kumagorou and sat him at the kitchen table.

"By the way," Yuzu said. "How are you, mama? Papa was only here for such a short time…"

Mother just laughed and waved her hand in the air. "I'm plenty happy if I can just see that all my sweethearts are happy! I'm so proud of you two too. Seeing you girls having each other's back… it's so relieving." Mei caressed Kumagorou's fur. There was one last thing she needed to do.


Mei sat on the floor, her back against the bed, Yuzu sitting cross-legged on the bed right beside her. The floor was full of scattered letters. She'd emptied out her drawer of unopened letters and had been going through all of them one by one.

Yuzu picked up one of the pictures that came with a letter. "Does he have a normal smile in any of these?" she said. "I guess the kids love the goofy faces." She picked up another one and showed it to Mei. "Look, a panda! He really has been all over the world!"

Mei set down the letter she just finished reading. It was about a time he spent Europe. He went into so much detail about all the different food he tried, all of them so new and different from what he'd ever had before. The picture with it showed him with a group of kids, one on his back pulling his ears. Mei briefly let out a chuckle before stopping herself. As she set the picture down, she heard a sniffle.

She looked up to see Yuzu crying. They were just few light tears. "What's wrong?" Mei asked.

Yuzu shook her head, her hands gripping the sheets tightly. "Sorry… It's just… Seeing you make up with your dad… Finally reading all his letters… I just got so happy for you…"

Mei gazed up at Yuzu, her heart swelling at the sight of her. She's cute. It was a weird but welcoming thought. Mei didn't feel that she'd done anything to deserve how much effort Yuzu put into helping her. This girl was so full of feeling and color, and Mei was starting to feel a bit of that in herself thanks to her. She wanted to be someone who better deserved someone as selfless and determined as Yuzu. And most of all, she let herself hope that Yuzu would stay by her side forever.

Mei sat up on the bed and reached her sleeve up to Yuzu's face, gliding it across her tears. Yuzu got startled and turned towards Mei, their faces a mere inch apart, their eyes wide.

Then, as if completely coordinated, they both leaned in, their lips gently landing on each other.

They both closed their eyes and guided each other's movements. Mei kissed against Yuzu's bottom lip while Yuzu kissed against her upper lip. It felt so natural, like neither of them needed to try. Yuzu pressed a little harder, and Mei shivered from the longing in Yuzu's advancements. Mei, needing to reciprocate, slipped their kiss so that she was on Yuzu's upper lip now. Yuzu gave in to her with eager acceptance, and Mei's whole body felt like it was on fire.

Mei felt Yuzu's fingers brush against hers. Mei slipped her fingers through Yuzu's their hands interlaced. Her fingers were so pleasingly long and smooth.

Completely lost in all the feeling, Mei slipped her tongue forward and found that Yuzu was doing the same. They slid their tongues along in their mutually frantic desire.

They each pulled away slowly, needing to breathe. Mei's mind was racing, the sensation of Yuzu's lips and tongue and her movements fresh in her mind. They looked up at each other and reality hit Mei like a meteor. They both pulled back from each other and Mei lifted her fingers to her lips. Yuzu's face was scarlet and full of nervous panic.

What was that? She'd never thought a kiss could be so relieving. Her body, heart, and soul were ablaze. Everything felt so right in those moments, not a single worry, not a single fear.

It was magical.