Mei pushed the apartment door open but felt someone pulling it open at the same time. She startled backwards upon seeing Yuzu dressed for going out with her school bag in hand.
"Mei! Welcome back! I mean goodbye," Yuzu said, laughing and rubbing the back of her head.
"You're going out tonight?" Mei asked.
"Well, yeah, I am. But I'm not slacking! I promise. I'm partnered with Harumin for a project so I'm heading to her place to work on it."
Taniguchi… Those two sure spent a lot of time together. Yuzu probably still talked more with her even though Mei was her girlfriend. Of course.
"Work well," Mei said.
"I'll see you tonight," Yuzu said, stepping outside while Mei stepped inside.
Mei watched Yuzu, waiting for something to come to her lips to say. Nothing did, so she just stood there awkwardly.
"Bye!" Yuzu said, smiling and waving before walking off.
Mei released a breath and smacked her forehead with her palm. Why the hell am I so awkward? Why can't I just talk to her like a normal person?
She closed the door and walked through the room with her head bent down, musing about Taniguchi. She was more mature than Yuzu but had a similar charisma and energy. Mei could understand why Yuzu liked her. Why does she have feelings for me?
"Don't walk into a wall."
Mei looked up. Mother was sitting at the couch, writing something in a notepad. She halted her writing.
"You're looking kinda out of it," she said. "Is everything okay?"
The worried eyes of a mother watched her. They were careful yet still intimidated her.
"Everything's fine."
Mother held her gaze and squinted. Mei started moving to her bedroom but stopped when Mother started talking again. "Hm. How's school been? Things getting better this semester?"
Mei sighed, anticipating a drawn-out conversation. She went over and sat on the couch next to her. It turned out that Mother had been drawing on the notepad.
"I've gotten to a great start this semester," Mei said. "I finished the last semester on a bad note, but I've got my headspace back under control. Thanks to Yuzu." She'd let that last part slip out without meaning to.
Mother chuckled and went back to her drawing. "So… everything's been dandy between you two?"
Mei hesitated while watching Mother's drawing. "Y-yes."
Everything really did seem to be going well. Both the dates they'd gone on were fun, and they'd managed to get back into their studies without being distracting to each other. Yuzu didn't get nearly as flustered anymore, and Mei had been looking forward to their next date, just thinking about it being enough to make her nervous. But there'd been something confusing her that she couldn't put into words. Something was missing.
Mother held out her notepad so that Mei could see it better. "What do you think?" she asked.
Seeing it closer, Mei's eyes widened. The drawing was an intricate pattern of flowing flowers. Looking closer, there were stylized words in the background that the flowers were weaving around. They spelled out a poem. Mei blushed. It was quite a romantic poem indeed.
"It's," Mei said, "very well done. I suppose."
Mother groaned dramatically. "Very well done? Shou better give it a more passionate compliment. I should color it. Yeah, that'll make it pop a lot more."
"I'm just surprised."
"Thought I'd be an awful artist?"
"No, it's not that. I just– Um, how does your relationship with Father work?"
Mother went back to her drawing, touching up details. "You're wondering because we don't get to see each other often?"
"How can you understand each other? How can you be sure that he cares about you? How can you figure out why?" Mei blushed violently. It wasn't like her at all to ramble. Yet, that had been happening lately. Yuzu's habits were invading her like a virus.
Mother turned to her, smiling. "Well, that's less about the distance and more about how you approach the relationship, I think. He still sends me letters all the time, just like he does with you. And this isn't the first time I've made something for him. You wonder how we know and understand our feelings? Hm, I think all it takes is us both being proactive. Because no matter what you try, no matter how it turns out, the fact of what you tried will show to the one you love and yourself why you care about each other so much."
Mei rested her chin on a fist. Being proactive? Would that really be enough, in and of itself, to figure out why Yuzu liked her? The whole point of letting Yuzu take the lead was because she was the one who had the instincts to navigate a relationship. I'm the one completely lost in this. How can I be proactive? Wait. Maybe Yuzu's just as lost as I am. If that's the case… I have to try something!
Mei looked up from her pondering and saw Mother gazing at her with a smile and understanding eyes. Is she reading into this?
"I was just very curious about you two!" Mei said hurriedly. "Since you didn't know each other for very long before getting married."
"Mhm," Mother said, nodding.
Speaking of my father… I could ask her… "So, why do you like him?"
Mother looked up and relaxed, as if picturing him in her mind. "Hm, how to put it? I suppose I find his passion so beautiful."
Mei blinked. "I've never thought of that word to describe my father."
Mother pouted and spoke stubbornly. "You have to look beneath the surface! Some people have trouble showing their feelings directly, but if you give them a chance, you'll see the passion in their hearts through their efforts and actions. Shou might not know how to talk to us about how much he loves us, but he definitely shows it. And that's what I'm doing right now. Being myself and doing what I know and like so that my feelings reach him."
Mei almost smiled. For adults, they were actually being quite cute. I couldn't be like that… Could I?
She stood up, a rush of resolve flowing through her, despite how unsure she still was.
"Thank you," Mei said. "Um, I mean, it was a nice chat. I understand Father much better now."
"Yeah, yeah," Mother said as Mei walked to her bedroom door and gripped the doorknob. "Good luck with Yuzu!"
Mei clenched the doorknob tightly. She's way too perceptive! How much is she figuring out?
Mei entered the bedroom, shaking off the freight Mother gave her.
How could she show Yuzu her feelings without understanding them herself? And how could she do it in a way for her to better understand Yuzu's feelings?
Do something like what Mother was doing? Mei frowned. No, she wasn't an artist, especially regarding cute things. She wasn't nearly childish enough to make something as silly as a love letter or a romantic drawing.
Mei plopped onto the bed and clutched Kumagorou.
Yuzu and Father had both given her teddy bears. She squeezed Kumagorou tighter reliving the memories of receiving Anothinko, the heart-throbbingly cute way Yuzu voiced him. Yuzu probably didn't even have to think about doing that. That was just how she naturally was.
Mei bolted up and looked to her desk. I just have to try something that I'm used to, that I'm good at. Thanks for the help, mom.
Mei perked up at her desk, hearing the apartment door opening in the distance. She scurried to shove her project into a desk drawer. It wasn't ready. She'd need to look it over at least three more times. Check for spelling errors. Poor handwriting. Ink stains. See how cringy some of the pages were and replace them.
Yuzu entered the room behind her. "Sorry I'm so late. We were working so well that we figured we'd get the thing all the way to halfway done since we were on such a good streak. Whatcha doing? Ya don't look busy."
Mei hadn't even thought to take something out to cover her tracks. To Yuzu, she'd just look like she was sitting at her desk doing nothing. How am I the flustered one now? God help me.
If she'd ever change this, she'd have to act. Mei pulled her desk open, pulled out the item, and stood up, holding it out to Yuzu.
Yuzu stepped forward and took the book, staring at it quizzically.
"I made this for us. I thought it'd be… nice. Or something."
"Yuzu and Mei's co-diary?" Yuzu said, reading the cover and then flipping to the first page.
Mei glared at her. Yuzu had always been unbelievably talkative. Right now, she just flipped through each page, reading the prompts at the top of each page, full of curiosity and surprise.
Taking her damn time to react.
"What do you think?" Mei asked, her patience faltered.
Yuzu looked up at her and they locked eyes. Then, Yuzu closed the book and clutched it to her chest, a wide grin spreading across her face.
"It's so heckin' adorable! Ah! This is such a cute idea! Did you come up with topic prompts yourself? That was your idea?"
Mei looked off to the side and tried to speak casually. "You once told me that you couldn't keep a diary because your thoughts were too much of a jumble. That gave me the idea to guide your thoughts with prompts. Then, I figured that we could both use this to get to know each other better. You know, seeing what the other writes and all." Just so I can dissect how your unfathomable brain works. If that's even possible.
Yuzu leaned forward. So close. Mei braced for a kiss.
"You remembered that?" Yuzu asked. Mei released a breath. No kiss. Okay. "Gosh, Mei. This really means a lot! You have no idea. Hey! Is it okay if I add some special modifications? Artsy it up a bit?"
"Of course." Yuzu went over to her desk and opened a drawer, pulling out a box. Then, she sat down on the bed and pulled out a whole bunch of colored markers. There must have been at least ten different variations of every color. She popped open a pink marker and excitedly got to work, not a single hesitation in any of her movements. The opposite of how Mei acted when she was working on it.
Yuzu stopped and looked up at Mei. "Hehe! When I'm done," she said, "this diary really will be a piece of both of us. It'll have my awesome cute drawings and your elegant thoughtful writing!"
Mei toyed with a lock of her hair and turned to sit down at her desk. You were right, Mom. I think I do understand why she likes me now. At least, a little bit.
Mei flipped to the eighth page of the diary to read Yuzu's latest entry. They were supposed to only make one entry per day, and it had only been three days. That was fine. Their schoolwork was going well so what was the harm in putting extra effort into their relationship?
Mei had been waiting for this entry to be filled. It was of utmost importance.
'List three romantic fantasies you dream of."
She'd scrapped this prompt four times before finally pushing through the nerves to put it in. It was so on-the-nose. Even someone as airheaded as Yuzu would immediately know that she was just fishing for advice on what to do. But, in the end, being blunt was the only way she could figure out how to get this information.
Mei's eyes lingered around the art on the page, as if her brain was too scared to read the entry just yet. Yuzu had gone quite overboard, decorating every single page. There were hearts, stars, cartoon faces in all kinds of expressions, and…
Teddy bears. Plenty of them. Mei smiled. There was so much variety to the color, as if she had hundreds of different markers. Maybe her absurd stockpile of art supplies wasn't so bad. The rainbow of colors brought it to life. Their co-diary had turned out beautifully.
Finally, her eyes fell upon the entry.
'Come on! That's a super loaded question. Well, it's not technically a question, but a command, but–never mind. You've probably guessed this about me, but I've wondered what it'd be like to be in a relationship for a long time. And I'm being totally honest when I say that, so far, my relationship with you has already surpassed all my expectations! I'm really sure that anything we do together will be better than my fantasies, but I'll try my best to think of three for you! 😉'
Mei's breathing picked up as she read. She's talking about me? Someone's saying these things about me?
'Going on a date wearing outfits that each of us picked out for the other! (I get to do your make-up!)'
'Going to a swimming pool together… I want to see you in a bikini, okay? There, I admit it!'
'Setting up a space in the apartment for us to dance to some music. It would be a nice bonus if we could set up some candles too…'
'There ya go! Three romantic fantasies just off the top of my head. Make my dreams come true, cutie!'
Cutie? You just called me cutie?
Mei straightened her posture and breathed out, calming her nerves. Yuzu always said absurd things like that.
Mei had been ashamed of how direct her question was, but… she got the results she needed. Everything would work out if she just took this advice. It was like an instruction manual, a guide on how to be Yuzu's perfect girlfriend. I've got this!
"Why did you bring that?" Mei asked as Yuzu pulled the co-diary out of her bag and opened to the latest entry.
Yuzu smiled and blushed. "Sorry! I just really, really like it. I still can't believe you came up with this idea! Not that I didn't know you could be so cute! I just–I like it, okay?"
"I understand." What Mei did wasn't all that special, it was just a book with some prompts. Why does she like it so much? Why do I like that she likes it? It shouldn't have been that big a deal. But it was.
And she called me cute again. Am I?
Mei glanced at Yuzu who was reading Mei's latest entry with a wistful smile on her face. That smiled glowed, those eyes sparkled, her hair swirled, her body practically bounced with every movement. Compared to you, no.
Mei had copped out on thinking about her own three romantic fantasies, just writing 'movie, dinner, kiss' to do it easily. Yuzu just stared at the pathetic entry, smiling at it. Really? You're really okay with that?
They reached the soup store, and Mei followed Yuzu as they browsed. Mei had demanded to make the three things Yuzu had listed be their next three dates. Today's date was picking each other's outfits.
Yuzu picked out a shirt and put a hand on her chin, inspecting it with questioning eyes. "Hm, no," she said. "Not sexy enough. I need to make the most of this opportunity."
Mei glared at her, jaw hanging. Then she closed her eye in a moment of acceptance. It was too late to back out now. The best she could do was make sure she got something nice out of it too.
"I'm going to look in another area," Mei said and then walked off to find something at least a little bit classy.
The two changed in their bedroom, their backs to each other.
Mei groaned as she struggled to pull on the black tank top. She pulled it on and grimaced. Was it supposed to be so small that it showed her belly and so tight that her boobs had no room to breathe? Yuzu probably underestimated Mei's size because she was used to being somewhat lacking in that regard.
She looked down at her legs. "You know," Mei said. "We're going to have to stay in for our date. I'm not going out in shorts." Even in summer, there was no way she'd go out in public like this. So revealing and tight… She looked over her shoulder at her behind, and her jaw clenched. Yuzu seeing her like this was terrifying enough.
"I–Yeah! I agree. Eh, I feel like such an idiot, getting you something so casual when you got me this."
"It figures we'd get items so opposite from each other. You have no sense of dignity. By the way, I'm done. You can turn around."
"I don't know. I wouldn't say this is the most modest dress ever. You can look now too."
Mei turned and her eyes went wide, drinking up the view of an angel. Yuzu was draped in a sleek dark violet dress with sparkling highlights. There was a strap over only one shoulder, and the dress had a slit down its length. She'd picked it for its simple elegance but seeing Yuzu's curves in them made her heart race. There was more to her figure than she'd thought…
Yuzu bent her leg through the opening slit, posed, and Mei reflexively stopped gawking.
"Hehe, like what you see?" Yuzu asked teasingly, though she was holding an arm at the elbow. Oh, you're all confident now, huh?
Mei huffed and crossed her arms. "I'm just impressed with myself for picking out something so nice. Meanwhile, you just got me rags."
Yuzu scampered up to her and took Mei's hands in hers. "Come on! There's no need to be that prude! You're lookin' like a snack in that!"
Mei looked to her feet, her hands sweating from Yuzu's grip.
Her reaction to the diary I made for us… The way she's so happy no matter what I say… Always insisting with how good I look no matter what…
Mei stepped forward and smiled, their hands held at their sides. Yuzu liked her. It was a simple truth. Who was she to worry so much about that? How could she question her and doubt her so much? She didn't need to put any extra effort into being Yuzu's perfect girlfriend. She likes me because I'm imperfect, doesn't she?
"Hey, Yuzu?"
"Yeah?"
"Thank you. For finding something in me to like. Through all my faults."
Yuzu giggled with a smile. "Well, I don't think you have many of those faults. If anything, the imperfections are what shine through your stoic exterior and make you so dang cute!"
Mei perked up, gazing at her gorgeous blonde girlfriend's shining green eyes. Maybe I understand her better than I thought I did.
Anyways, if she'd gone through all the effort of getting Yuzu in a dress, she may as well get a dance out of it. Mei brought one of Yuzu's hands up, took a small step forward, and started leaning in slightly. "We could–"
Yuzu smacked her lips onto Mei's, holding tightly in a long slow embrace. Mei leaned into Yuzu's mouth caressing against hers. What was I just thinking about? Did it matter? Probably not. She brought her hands up and wrapped them around Yuzu's back. She let her legs relax as she held herself onto this wonderful kisser.
Yuzu pulled back from the kiss, and Mei gazed up at her blushing face
"W-were you always taller than me?" Am I dreaming? That would explain why that kiss was so heavenly.
Yuzu grinned at her with smug eyes. "I'm wearing heals, so I get to be taller today. Besides, you're practically leaning on me."
That expression and those words punched Mei back to reality. She defeated me so easily! Mei closed her eyes and stiffened her posture. "I was trying to get you to dance with me. I wasn't asking for a kiss!"
Yuzu giggled and took hold of Mei's waist. "My bad, it's just…" Yuzu slid one hand down and stroked her fingers softly up Mei's thigh. Mei shivered. Yuzu leaned in, her face up against Mei's ear and whispered, "…you really do look so delicious." A throbbing pulsed in her lower belly. She pulled back, blushing radiantly.
"Okay! Let's just dance! Okay?"
Yuzu giggled and guided them into a simple sway. "Sorry! I just couldn't help myself. But I got that outta my system, so I'll control myself and be a good girl now." She winked and Mei couldn't help but smile.
As they went on dancing and smiling together, Mei found herself wishing that Yuzu would do that one more time.
