"I love you, Mu"
Mu shifted uneasy in his bed. He had been with Kanon nearly nine months already, in which at times he wondered if either of them would get to say such a thing, whether it would be real and what would happen afterwards.
"I love you, Mu"
He didn't think Kanon lied, but somehow it felt… ill–timed.
"I love you, Mu"
Said like that, it didn't feel natural, it didn't feel right.
"I love you, Mu"
It actually ruined the moment. Mu felt horribly out of place after that.
Meeting the others almost fixed his mood. Lunch with Shura, Camus and Milo was much more amusing than he expected. Well, Milo's energy was contagious and Kanon did nothing but constantly wind him up. Even Shura seemed to forget his hangover. So it was overall, an enjoyable event.
Just afterwards, Camus left for the library and Milo left for the Coliseum. Shura had some errands at Rodorio and Kanon thought it would be fine to tag along to get supplies himself. Mu agreed to go too since he was again running out of everything.
As they reached Gemini, Kanon left them waiting in the hall as he went to get his money.
– So you do have money! – complained Milo as surprised as his other friends
– This is the last time I invite you lunch! – said Shura loud
– I knew it – said Camus crossing his arms in an I–told–you–so attitude. But once Kanon was out of view, he turned to Mu – We are just messing with him, Mu.
– Don't think he is such a freeloader. – said Milo
– We rarely ever see him. – added Shura
– I know, don't worry. He is too proud to live out of others.
– But tell us, Mu. Since when do you like Kanon? – Camus right away stepped on Milo's foot at the same time Shura gave him a smack in the back of his head
Mu blinked surprised by the question and the others sudden reaction
– What's wrong?! Like you don't want to know! – said Milo to his friends
– That is not of your business – explained Camus
– Almost since I met him, that would be… – answered Mu with a smile which left the others speechless – the first time the twins publicly fought, like… ten months already
– So long? And why? – This time, neither Shura or Camus prevented Milo from making questions – What do you like about him? – Unconsciously, the three friends suddenly turned into jealous little brothers. Mu chuckled.
– Aside from his looks? He is pretty dependable, clever, kind and always has an interesting topic to talk about.
– Are we talking about the same Kanon? – Milo rose an eyebrow, skeptical
– Saga's twin? I think so. How many more Kanons are there?
– Alright, if you say so. Mu, sorry to tell you this but you got the weirdest taste. Well, lucky you, he seems to like you too.
Mu smiled with a mild blush in his cheeks, but it didn't went unnoticed for Shura and Camus the sadness in the Lemurian's eyes when he looked away.
– Milo, don't be so nosy. – scolded Camus sending a concerned look towards Shura.
– What are you plotting? – said Kanon as he approached – you look awfully suspicious.
– And you, Kanon? – said Milo quickly, confusing the older saint – have you tried the new menu at the restaurant by the plaza?
– New menu?
– Yes, they put it out like a week or so, but I haven't got the chance to go there. Let's dinner there!
– I'll think about it. – said Kanon turning to leave. The others followed him
– If you can't beat them, confuse them – whispered Milo with a wink to Mu
And sure, just before dinner time, Milo excused himself from dinner using Saga as cover. Well it wasn't quite a lie, the pope did summoned him but it wouldn't take that long to do whatever he requested. Shura conveniently ran into Aioria and left with him. Finally, they communicated with Camus, but he had lost track of time, aside from being behind with his duties for the day so he could not join them either.
– Don't tell me they did this on purpose? – said Kanon with his hand to the forehead – Darn
They were standing just out of the restaurant
– Well, we are already here, do you want to go in or would you like something else?
– It's ok, let's go.
So they had dinner, a pleasant one and everything seemed fine.
– What's wrong, Mu? – Kanon asked in the way back. He feared his careless comment would have terrible consequences.
– I'm not sure… Kanon – Mu turned to him. The Helene stopped walking – did something… happened today?
– What do you mean?
Mu looked down wondering
– I can't shake the feeling… of having done something wrong… – Kanon became concerned right away – What you said today… – and tensed up – I can't deny I have been looking forward to hear it, but it somehow felt… well… out of place.
The Gemini right away thought of Saga. Well, Mu was a psychic, maybe he read Kanon's mind. Although, he was also a gold saint, maybe his sixth sense alerted him. Whatever the reason, the Aries was weary and that could not be a good sign.
Kanon took one of Mu's bangs, a loving gesture that always send shivers down the younger man back, and looked into his big greenish eyes.
– Maybe it was not the right time. Saying it right then might get misinterpreted as sheer lust or at least self interest… but I mean what I said, little lamb. I do love you. – Kanon kissed his forehead – It never before occurred to me I was even capable of such a thing.
As late as it was and with no other source of light than the moon in that lonely road, Kanon's dark eyes looked like the night sky. His gentle yet mild embarrassed gesture didn't allow Mu to doubt him. He felt an unbearable urge to jump to his arms and answer back. Yet, for the second time, he could not and thus he wanted to cry. But he hid away in the comfort of the older man's sudden embrace. Only by leaning his temple on the older man's cheek, Mu could regain composure so they could keep walking the temples road and part ways without much hassle.
Kiki greeted him, but Mu didn't seem to notice. He was distracted all night and could not properly sleep.
As the sun began taking over the sky, he sat in his bed and contacted Shion telepathically.
"Pope Shion. Good morning. I notice you are awake..."
"Good morning, Mu. Is something the matter?"
"Actually, that's what I wanted to ask you. I can't help but feel something is off today… Am I interrupting something?"
"… Saga is not feeling well today" answered Shion after a hesitant silence
"what do you mean?" Mu sprang up
"… he cancelled all his appointments for yesterday and today, except the General meeting. I went to ask him about it and he said he needed some rest. When I left, he only looked tired so I let him be. But a few moments ago, he asked Dokko if he could take over at the meeting. This time he refused to meet anyone. I was considering teleporting into his room, but I'm not so sure that would help… Do you know anything, Mu?"
"Something happened between him and Kanon. I'm not sure what it is, but I'd like to go see him"
"… Alright, Mu"
"I'll go right up!"
The Aries stood up, quickly prepared himself for the day and teleported away.
Up in the Pope's chambers there was a very weird stillness. Mu met Shion just out of the pope chambers
– Are you sure he is still in there? – said Mu, hesitantly, because they couldn't quite feel Saga's cosmos on the other side of the door.
Shion frowned and went it. The central room was empty so both Aries went towards his dorm. That door was locked, and beyond it, there was a very faint but familiar presence…
– Maybe he is asleep. – said Mu not pretty convinced
– You might be right. Let's wait at the central room.
An old maid was waiting there and right away offered them some breakfast. As she returned with coffee, tea and some bread, Athena had joined her saints in the waiting. But the time for the meeting approached and they had to leave. Mu escorted Athena to the main hall while Shion stayed behind. Over there almost everyone had arrived.
The Aries expected to run into another weird scene between Kanon and his friends but the Gemini saint had not arrived yet. Shura, Camus and Milo were calmly waiting together for the meeting, so Mu took a place among his friends while the holy girl sat at her throne. Kanon arrived just when Dokko decided to go up the stairs to talk to Athena about how to proceed.
But then Saga entered the hall by the back door and to Mu it seemed like the delicate balance of the universe was broken as soon as the twins made eye contact.
– Thank you everyone for attending the meeting… – The air between them grew thin, becoming a void. As if each of them existed in different realities, different times and spaces seen together by the foul play of an event horizon.
"Mu, what's happening?" asked Dokko directly to his mind. "Shion hasn't arrived, I can't reach him" He had noticed the disturbance between the twins and Mu's sudden distress
"That isn't Saga. It's an astral projection. Something is gone worst"
At that time, both Mu and Dokko saw by the corner of the eye how Shura left the hall. Possibly looking out for the real Saga.
– I'm glad we have such attendance today, your participation is highly appreciated. I'm well aware there are still several pending issues, many of you have reached out for help on your concerns and I assure you work is getting done towards resolution. Unfortunately, I won't be able to personally attend you all today, my deepest apologies if I let you down, but I requested Dokko's support. He'll present you the latest resolves and actions taken, please listen to him and present him your questions so they can be correctly addressed. Dokko please take it from here.
As Dokko took over and Saga left the same way he entered, most gold saints remained idle. They were way more concerned about Saga's withdrawal than whatever topic was being discussed. Besides, where was Shion? Everyone but Kanon became restless. Even Athena was distracted.
The meeting went by in a blink since only silver saints cared to check on their tasks and concerns and Dokko was not fully aware of every little detail as Saga would. So he delivered the information he was given and took notes to pass forward. But little else.
– Well, if there's nothing else to look into, our meeting gets dismissed. Thank you everyone for your hard work, see you around!
As everyone turned to leave, Mu held Kanon by the wrist and waited until most saints were out.
"What happened? What did you do?" asked the Aries telepathically
Kanon blinked surprised at the anger in Mu's eyes
"What do you mean?"
"Back at the day Shura got drunk. Something happened, something… broke. What was it?"
"How would I know?" Kanon frowned upset
Noticing only gold saints remained in the hall at that time, Mu pulled Kanon's arm to place him within a mighty punch reach. Kanon hit the floor hard before everyone else's surprise. Mu was mad as nobody had ever seen him.
– Are you seriously disregarding the whole deal just like that? – Mu's telekinesis threw Kanon against a wall.
– Mu! – Dokko immediately hurried to hold him down, to keep him from attacking the Gemini with any special technique.
Aphrodite and Deathmask hurriedly kicked out all other lower rank saints before things could turn nasty, and they themselves guarded the hall to keep the mess from spilling out.
– I thought it was clear... – Said Kanon recovering from the assault.
Milo and Aioria instinctively rushed to stand between the two
– Guys calm down!
– Mu, what is this about?
"If you were once a victim you are now the offender!" claimed Mu directly to Kanon's mind
"What do you expect me to do? Just crawl back at him like a stray dog?"
"He is not the same man and he needs you. You need him" Mu's anger was turning his thoughts to a telepathic attack. Still it wasn't so bad that Kanon could not hold his ground.
"He discarded me like a rag doll when I needed him most!"
"You keep saying that, but you abandoned him all the same. You can't blame it all on him! Now he is truly trying his best to fix his misdeeds and it is you who won't give him a chance. What do you expect him to do? Do you really want him dead?!"
That last word seemed to rebound inside Kanon's skull enough to knock him hurting, dazed and nauseous to the floor.
– Kanon! – While Milo was about to spring forward to help him, Camus was more than ready to strike Mu. Of course Shaka would not allow that...
– This is not worth my time... let's have a time out, shall we? – And so Mu teleported Kanon away without anyone doing anything to stop him
– Mu! Where did you sent him? – Dokko tried to approach him
– Where I'll send all of you if you don't get out of my way!
Startled at Mu's rage, Dokko backed off. Nobody really tried to hold him back, even if they'd tried, they would have faced the crystal walls he built all around himself towards the exit. Once in the corridor, instead of going out, he went in the opposite direction, towards the pope's chambers, where surely Shura had gone.
He hadn't stepped in there since he escaped to Jamir. There was a weird feeling to it all as he walked the old hallways, so dear to him once and so alien now. Once he reached the Pope's chambers, he could perceive Shion, Shura and Saga in there.
He knocked the door, but didn't waited for an answer since he was sure he was not quite welcome in there. The large living room was empty so Mu moved more hesitantly towards the bedroom.
In there, both Shura and Shion were standing at a distance from Saga, who just held his head sitting in the bed. They turned to him when he appeared at the door.
– I'm sorry for intruding...
– Mu, what are you doing in here? – There was something truly off with Saga that made the Aries shiver. It was that weird feeling he ran away from so many years ago. The seed of wickedness he had feared for so long, threatening to take control of the pope once more. Sitting in there, Saga was struggling to keep it confined, but he was losing hope of success.
Standing stoic in the room, Shura was so terribly afraid of him, he didn't dared get any closer. Nothing on his rictus showed any evidence of this, but Mu could not be fooled. Shion was pretty much the same. Was this what Shion felt before getting murdered? Was this the same Shura felt before being ordered to hunt down his comrade?
Mu stepped forward.
– I'm sorry... – He said kneeling down before Saga. – I didn't meant to interfere in any way, that's why I didn't told you earlier – Mu understood hiding from him was actually the problem, not that he had done it intentionally. – Saga, I love him. I never meant to hide anything, it just it never occurred to me how important it was, or that it would have any relevance...
As Saga suddenly grabbed Mu's shoulder the Aries fell backwards in fear. Even Shura stepped forward ready to help him. But all Saga did was to hug him relieved.
– It's ok, I'm sorry. – Whispered Saga. – You both are free to do as you please… You don't even have to tell me anything… I understand that... but... I can't bear... – Saga moved back with a hand to his forehead – To be kept apart from his life... it's been almost a year... it's yet another year and still I know nothing about him... nothing has changed... – The wickedness was gone. Saga was only Saga again.
As Shura sighed relived, Shion went out the door.
– Thank you Mu. – Saga stood up and helped Mu to his feet. Although scared of him, Mu had decided to trust him, Mu trusted him. He was still trustable; he could not give in to despair just yet.
– We won't let you fall, Saga. – Said Mu with a sincere smile.
Saga nodded and the Aries left. Alone in the room finally Shura managed to get closer to Saga.
– You need to rest... – He said placing a reassuring hand in his friend shoulder. Saga was indeed too tired to oppose.
– Mu… – Called Shion to the younger Aries in the hallway, he turned around – can we talk? – Mu nodded mechanically, actually he felt weak and with a knot in his throat. They went in the pope's study. – Mu, what is going on? Today Saga woke up so ill he couldn't even stand from the bed. Both Shura and I feared the worst. Then you arrived, and what you just said seemed to put everything back on track…
– From what I understand… Kanon and Saga share some sort of psychic link… through which Saga found out… Kanon was meeting someone, that someone being me… He must have felt someone was stealing him his brother… I didn't mean… – Mu could not continue talking
– How serious is your relationship with Kanon? – Asked Shion in a soft voice, he had never seen Mu so troubled. Although he was concerned about Saga and Kanon, he was way more concerned about Mu, since he considered him as his own son.
– Not as much as we'd like…
– Have you been intimate?
Mu just nodded
– Have you been intimate with any other male, Mu?
– Not recently…
The former pope sighed.
Mu interpreted it as Shion being disappointed of him, so the young Aries felt even worse than before, but…
– As much as I'd like to reassure you Mu, I'm at a loss. It pains me to see you trapped in the twins' affairs. Please don't interfere if they fight again.
Confused, Mu looked at Shion, he then realized his mentor was way more worried about his wellbeing and safety than anything else.
Kanon regained his consciousness thanks to a very familiar call too close to be good. Once he recognized it as waves breaking nearby, he opened his eyes startled, imagining himself prisoner at cape Sounion. But he was relieved when he saw the blue sky and white fluffy clouds. He was lying flat in the sand with his head resting on Mu's lap.
– I really don't have any luck at all. – Said the Aries with a soft voice – I always fall for the must inconvenient people, fully aware of how inconvenient they are. I should just give up...
– That is why I didn't want you to get involved with me...
– I know, I should have listened to you. I just don't learn...
Kanon had a sinking feeling, like the Mu he had learned to adore was a castle made of sand which was being washed away by the tide. His warm smiles, his amused chuckle, his mischievous looks, the fast wrinkling of his nose when he disliked something, the fire that engulfed them both when they turned intimate, the joy and the possessiveness he showed at those times... all of that was slowly drifting away in the waves of sadness, leaving nothing behind than that mask of polite gentleness he used to avoid conflicts.
– Although, you are the first one to use me as a tool for revenge...
Kanon immediately sat up to find Mu's vision blurred by tears. He tried to clear them, he closed in to kiss him, but for the first time, Mu placed a hand in Kanon's chest and pushed him back as he turned away to stand up.
– If you are feeling better, we should head back. Everybody must think I murdered you or something.
And that was it. He began walking the way back to the temples without saying another word. It was all gone...
Both Aioria and Aldebaran were sitting at Taurus temple entrance looking down at Aries and the training fields.
They both were worried by what happened at the main hall. Nobody had ever seen Mu so murderous mad before. And he had disappeared in thin air after sending Kanon who knows where. Even if anyone wanted to look out for either of them, they could be anywhere, where to start? Saga and Shura were also missing but all Athena did was send the other saints on their way with a very sad smile.
It was Aldebaran the first one to see both the Aries and the Gemini going up the stairs towards them.
Neither Taurus nor Leo said a thing. Both stood up from where they sat and walked around the temple as not to meet the others. They didn't look approachable anyways, but at least they seemed pretty much in one piece.
Both Kanon and Mu went through Taurus without awkward encounters. When they reached Gemini, Kanon turned his steps towards the private chambers while Mu kept going for the stairs up. It hurt... It hurt at the Gemini to see those pale locks flutter in the wind and disappear behind a rock.
Cancer temple was also empty, as was Leo, so he reached Virgo when the sun was beginning to set in the horizon. There was nobody around, not even one of Shaka's usual disciples, the building was pretty much in darkness, only the altar was lit. But Mu didn't even noticed, his vision was still blurred by all the tears held in them. He had followed the path to the private chambers in automatic, he didn't even noticed where he was until he found himself silently crying his soul out in Shaka's arms.
Early next morning, Aioria and Aldebaran met Shaka just out of his chambers. Since Mu didn't went down the day before, they figured he must have gone to him. They were worried and desperately wanted to know if there was anything they could do.
– I couldn't get him to tell me what happened, he just won't say anything. – Said Shaka incapable of hiding his own worries.
– Morning, guys. – Said Dokko arriving followed by Shiryu and Kiki
– Good morning, Dokko… – Greeted Aioria
– Is Mu in here?
Shaka nodded and suddenly he found Kiki clinging from his robe
– Let me see him! What happened? Is he alright? May I come in? Please, let me see him!
– Kiki, Mu doesn't feel too good. – Said Aioria kneeling down at his height – We should let him rest…
– But yesterday… – Then Kiki turned to the door like he's called. Everyone figured Mu must be calling the boy telepathically… – But why? – Whispered Kiki about to start crying. He looked up at Shaka and he let him go in. Kiki rushed inside. Not too many minutes passed before they heard him crying inside and Mu talking softly to him.
"Dokko…" called the Aries directly to the Libra's mind. "Could you please take care of Kiki for a little while? I promise it won't be long…"
Kiki came out of Shaka's chambers
"Don't worry, Mu. I'll take care of him"
But then they all turned to the temple entrance. Someone not very welcome had just arrived. It was both Aioria and Aldebaran who rushed to meet him.
– Kanon! – They both were real mad
– What are you doing here?
Kanon didn't say a thing, he just kept walking. Aioria and Aldebaran got so mad they attacked him. But their attacks had no effect on the figure that kept walking. After a combined attack, the intruder disappeared.
Shaka, who remained with Shiryu and Dokko close to the chambers, turned to his left to see Kanon standing next to them, the only obstacle in his way was Mu's crystal barrier blocking the entrance to the chambers.
– Mu, don't do this… – He called, leaning against the crystal barrier – Please, come out
To Shaka's surprise, Mu was just behind the wall by the door, the Virgo could see him from outside, the Gemini couldn't. Aldebaran and Aioria came back as soon as they realized they were fighting an illusion, but Shaka didn't let them interfere.
"Have you come to promise me the world, eternity or something of the sort? Sweet nothings to make me welcome you to my bed again?" Mu was too affected to talk. Besides he didn't wanted the others to get involved further
Dokko noticed how Kanon tensed up, which could not be a good sign.
– I know you are mad so I'll let this one slide, but know I don't take insults slightly, so don't abuse my patience. – Kanon sighed – I hoped that, by now, you from all people would know I wouldn't even care to try anything of the sort for such trivial gratification. There are safer ways to go around… please, – Kanon leaned against the crystal wall – You've been in my mind, you know what I was really after and that this was not what I intended. I'm sorry…
"Being sorry is not enough… you knew he was aware of everything and yet you continued to mercilessly rub on his face that not only you won't trust him but also how lonely he is. It's just as he said, you only used me to get at him"
– No, that's not it! – Kanon stepped back
– IT IS JUST LIKE THAT! AND I'M TO BLAME TOO FOR BEING SO BLIND!
– ALRIGHT, I KNEW, SO WHAT? – Kanon finally snapped – I CAN'T HELP IT AS HE COULD NOT. – No, screaming back at Mu didn't felt one bit right. He sighed and continued in a calmer voice. – … Neither do it on purpose, that's just the way it is… – Kanon clenched his fists. As much as he wanted to remain calm, losing Mu because of Saga was much more than he could take. "Shall I live my life like his shadow forever? Shall I forsake everything just to please him? Would that make everything right?". His eyes blurred with frustration and despair.
"No… but you cannot just excise him from your life like he is a gangrenous limb."
– But I can try!
– WHY WOULD YOU? – Mu hit the wall, but right away regretted rising his voice like that, "Don't you realize the reason you connect like that is because you can't stop thinking on each other?" He took a hand to his head and hid his face. "And you can't stop, because this separation is unnatural. And this will keep going until you make amends and are at peace with each other…" Kanon flinched, Mu continued "why do you refuse to walk out of your prison if the bars have long been worn down? The more he tries to reach you, the more you crawl back in. Have you forgotten how it is to be outside?"
– Well of course. How do you expect me to remember?
Mu sighed and leaned on the wall. "Kanon, what am I to you?"
– Come on, little lamb, do you really need to ask? – Kanon sighted, he tried to speak but he couldn't quite make up words. "Mu you were the only one not to look at me with suspicion when I arrived. You were the only one who honestly gave me the benefit of doubt and cared to get to know me. You helped me and supported me. You gave me a chance nobody cared to offer. Mu, you are all the good that's left in my life. I love you…"
"And that is why we can't let this go on." Mu clenched his fists and tears rolled down his face
– That doesn't make any sense.
"Kanon, you reminded me how it was to be me." He sighed "You reminded me how it was to laugh, to get mad, to enjoy a day outdoors and laze around, what I liked, what I don't… you are the first person in like forever to actually listen to me, to share a day with me instead of acting like you need to protect me or to please me. I love you too, but don't you realize this is getting too big to keep it hidden under the carpet?"
"Hidden?"
"We have been together for nine months yet your friends don't know it. Mine have been suspecting for months but are not sure. We don't normally meet out in the open unless there's someone else. You won't visit me unless there's nobody at Aries, and I don't visit you at Gemini at all. You can't tell me that's not hiding. It's like we are two criminal trying to lay low."
"Mu, that is because…"
"I know you are trying to protect me from Saga, it worries you not knowing how he would take our relationship and you fear he won't accept it. At first you tried to hide from him, I noticed. But just as you said, it can't be helped. If you are too worried about not getting noticed, you are not with me to the fullest. And so you turned sloppy, and eventually you no longer cared. But I do care. Kanon, I met Saga way before I met you."
"You don't know him…" Kanon turned somber
"… I can't simply let him wither away thinking some random person has his brother's full attention while he gets none. He needs some… so… I told him… about us"
– What? why?
"He has been worrying sick about you. What kind of person is his brother with? Would they be serious, would they threat him right?"
"He is only jealous"
"Well of course he is! Finally he's got the chance to be with his brother but where is he? Out with some stranger. At least he is now at rest. He was grateful I told him and glad it was me, and what evil has he plotted against us? Now you leave, I don't want to see you"
– Mu…
"I want… I want the next time we get together to be able to think only of you, and that you get to think only of me. And not care about anyone else."
– And they said I am greedy… – Said Kanon with a smirk
"until then, I want nothing else with you"
– … I can't argue with that logic. But what if that day never comes?
"You just said you love me. It can't never come. I don't think I can love anyone else anymore, so I'll just wait for it to happen. I'll wait for you, as long as it takes. We both deserve it"
"You do deserve better…"
"Don't give me that. That's the lamest excuse there is to give up."
– You are being naïve… – Kanon sighed – Is it final, then?
– It is… – Said Mu from inside.
Kanon remained silent for a moment. Dokko couldn't help to notice how Kanon's eyes steeled up. But before he could say anything…
– Have your way… – Kanon vanished like he had never been in there. Not even Shaka with his keen senses could tell him apart from the breeze moving through the temple.
– You are the one being naïve, trickster… – Mu lifted the crystal barrier
"You do deserve better, I can't help to wish you'd get it someday, and yet… I can't shake the selfishness of wanting you only for myself, little lamb."
"You get better, and then I'll get you." Mu turned around and slumped down at the nearest sofa, exhausted. Shaka was the first one to get to him.
– Mu, – He kneeled down beside him – did you just broke up with Kanon?
The Virgo got scared of the bitter smile and angry look on his dear friend
– Don't get confused Shaka. – he said – There was nothing to break.
– Your heart, Mu
The Aries felt the last of his strength abandon him when the Virgo hugged him. He had a terrible urge to scream, to cry, to laugh, to run away and take it on anything, all at the same time, but he didn't manage to do more than accept his friend's comfort.
That day Shaka missed his meditation with his disciples. He left them in the garden to train by themselves however they felt like. He stayed playing his veena in his room. But no matter how beautifully he played, he could not make Mu feel any better.
The Aries was mad as the Virgo had never seen before. So mad in fact, the Lemurian didn't know how to handle it. He laid in the Indian's bed facing the wall with his eyes full of tears, his body tense and his head hurting. Although it didn't hurt as much as his heart. It was late and he was getting tired.
– Mu, what happened? Why are you so mad? – Dokko had tried to talk to him almost as soon as Kanon left. The Chinese had noticed a change in the young man over the last few months, as if gradually he had more energy to go around. As Shion's disciple was a very reserved person, the old saint assumed it was due the new life style in the Sanctuary. It surprised him to learn from Aioria, Shaka and Aldebaran it was more likely to be due Kanon. They have grown close, although none of them knew exactly how close; the Virgo just left it as "very" when he let Dokko into his room. – Mu, won't you talk to me?
– I'm sorry… I'm not… in the mood to talk…
– I can see that, but it might be useful…
– Leave me… please…
When Shaka finally stopped playing, he lay down next to a sleeping Mu.
– I'm sorry… – Was the first thing the Indian heard when he sat in the bed next morning. His dear friend was still facing the wall but not one bit asleep
– What for?
Mu shrugged
– For invading your room, for bearing with me… you had no need of this.
– I'm the one who is sorry, – Mu turned to Shaka – For not being able to make you feel better.
A little late not so many mornings afterwards, Dokko, Shura, Aldebaran, Angelo and Shion were going down the temples road when they suddenly froze still at Gemini temple entrance by hearing a very angry and familiar voice coming from the way of the altar at the back.
– I can't freaking believe it! Have you any idea the time it is? It's near 9 in the morning! I don't really care if you join the others on daily duties or not at this point, but this is outrageous... Kanon! Snap out of it! Stand up already and clean this mess at once!
Saga was furious, yelling at a Kanon lying on top of the Gemini altar with his head and shoulders hanging from a side, making him look at everything upside down.
– Kanon, are you listening to me? You are nothing short from a disgrace to Athena saints. I certainly don't know what the hell are you here for, getting this wasted in broad daylight. Have you been drinking since yesterday? You truly have no shame.
Kanon didn't react to his brother in any way. Although his eyes were open, he looked completely out of it. If the glass bottles and cans all around him were any indicator, he was drunk beyond a mere hangover.
– What does someone like Mu see in you?
Shion was about to stop Saga, certainly yelling at his brother in his current state was not going to have any effect. But Shura stepped forward first, with his clenched fist showing his murderous intent.
– He is listening to you, Saga. So you better shut up already.
– Shura? – Saga turned to the Capricorn, startled both by his sudden apparition and his harsh tone.
– Leave
Saga's anger redirected to his friend. How dare he shut up and throw out the pope, the former Gemini saint from his own temple?
– Stay out of this Shura. How can you defend him? Just look at him! – Just when he said that, Saga noticed the rest of the audience, although Shura had completely forgotten they existed
– I am looking at him. As did Mu, and as Milo, Camus, Ikki and Athena do. So why can't you?
Those words pierced through Saga like Excalibur itself, making him look down at Kanon. The younger Gemini was truly a sorrowful sight, and Saga felt ashamed of not being helpful at all.
– Leave. – Repeated Shura.
After a moment of hesitation, Saga's astral projection vanished.
But Shura was still real mad. It took him a bit to shake his anger at least out of his voice so he could approach Kanon. But instead of reaching for him right away as the others expected, he took one of the empty bottles lying around, mostly to check what it was and calculate just how wasted Kanon really was.
– Sorry to tell you not even Milo would get that wasted from this alone. So if this is all you had, I'm afraid you'll live. You won't even grace my record like this. Hope nobody does... – Kanon did not react. Shura let go of the bottle and continued casually – You should have told me you were on a drinking spree, I could have joined you for a worthwhile hangover instead of spending the night making plans I apparently won't go through with… I would have at least made sure you wouldn't run out of supplies midway or would have helped get you unconscious faster. The least I could do was ensure the supplies quality. Milo said I've become picky on the matter, but Camus normally agrees with my choices... – Shura leaned on the altar, before the other saints' puzzled looks. They were expecting him to pick Kanon up and take him to his room already – He never told you what we had that time, right? You missed two bottles of his latest fortified wines discoveries, don't remember but the taste. It's become a hobby of sorts for him to hunt down unusual stuff like that. We got real hooked on it. Then it was one bottle of my special reservoir. When we ran out of food we crashed the whisky. Have you heard about the devil's sip? Well, somehow we reversed it, as if we had the devil's cornucopia. I have no idea where that much alcohol was coming from. Camus just kept serving, bottles just manifested themselves. I have no idea what Milo was into at that point. He called it a night half way through it. Camus and I were expecting you to arrive at any time but since you didn't, we had to split your share, don't keep half bottles policy is still on. I don't need to tell you the rest since you surely recall it better than me. Good thing you finally arrived when you did. – Kanon sort of puffed and closed his eyes frowning, proof he was paying attention. Shura kept talking casually. – Our drinking sessions ought to be weird indeed, don't you think? We end up mixing Spanish, French and Greek in the same sentences. You know we must stop when Camus begins speaking Russian. He learned Russian from his mentor, right? Which was an advantage when he trained Hyoga. Now because of the kid he is trying to learn Japanese. He must be the one knowing more languages in the Sanctuary. I wonder if that counts towards being cosmopolitan given how social he is. – That was sarcasm – Or does that has nothing to do? I hope he takes over today's lunch. It was Milo's turn to cook but I fear I get to meet Hades again each time he does. Now you have given me the perfect excuse as not meeting them today so I thank you. Although if they happen to come by before lunch and catch you like this they'll worry and we won't be able to shake them off for the rest of the day. And you won't be able to shake them off at all once you recover. Good thing you don't have a working kitchen, that way they won't be messing up your place. It's a nightmare to clean after them, – Shura rubbed his temple – Only Camus is worth the effort. If only Milo would learn something. Guess nobody can be good at everything… They'd been planning a trip in a week from now, Camus told me last night. He'd like to go fishing to the open sea. It might be just another excuse to drink a freaking lot, either way I haven't decided what to take on board. He wants you to join us, if only you were not so difficult to locate, he would have told you already. Now that I did please act surprised when he mentions it. Milo says the fact you were a Marina General doesn't mean you know your way around in a boat, much less with baits or lines. As if he were any good. He hasn't even caught a cold yet. I thinks as long as you help us don't get lost would be fine. You do are a good Navigant, right? So, what do you say? – Shura offered Kanon a hand.
There were a few tears rolling down the Gemini's face. Neither of the other saints knew what to make of that.
– Don't be selfish and let me go... – Kanon had covered his face with his hands
Suddenly Shion and Dokko realized that beyond being drunk, Kanon had fallen dangerously deep into his helplessness, and the intention behind such apparently trivial and excessive wordiness from Shura was to remind Kanon how others still cared for him as person and friend so not everything was lost yet.
– Don't you remember we once did that? – Said Shura on a neutral tone – And now it is a mistake we have to live with.
In a single violent move, Kanon rolled backwards reaching the floor with his hands first and then his feet, springing forward to shove Shura away.
– What the... – Angelo as the others was startled
– And why would I care about anyone but me!? – Each of the Gemini's words was emphasized by a vicious attack from him
Shion was about to interfere again, but Dokko stopped him
– Let Shura handle this
– You tell me. – replied the Capricorn to the Gemini's question while evading every single blow.
– Galaxian... – Kanon's attack was cut short by Shura's punch to his stomach
As the Gemini bended in pain, the Capricorn held him
– Try killing me once you're sober. – Despite Kanon's raw power, he wasn't fast nor accurate enough to face Shura with so much alcohol in his system – But know Milo, Camus and I talked with Athena after we learned what happened to you and she agreed no matter what you do, you won't be imprisoned again.
– Death sentence? – Kanon took a hand to his head. The world was spinning too bad
– Exile, and us with you.
Angelo and Aldebaran were utterly shocked
– You are insufferable...
– I though you were used to it. – Shura helped him up again. – It'd do us good to retire, to Camus and me. Milo is just being supportive.
– What kind of saints ditch their goddess so carelessly?
– We'll be leaving the Sanctuary behind, never Athena.
– Hypocrites. – Kanon tried to stand on his own – You are just using me to get the hell out of here. But you'll get tired of me, just like everyone else.
– Well, you certainly don't simplify things for us. But that's what you get for mingling with the three most stubborn people in the sanctuary.
Kanon snorted – just my luck – He then turned to leave but tripped and fell to his knees in front of the altar. Then he saw the cans and bottles
– Fitting… – He said with a bitter grin
Once again Aldebaran wondered what does the mess fit with
– You are not an empty can, Kanon. – Said Shura arching an eyebrow and standing just behind him. Aldebaran turned somber…
– Oh not just any can – He said reaching one. – An alcohol can at a sacred altar. – Noticing it still had some liquid left, he just drank it in one gulp. – No good while full, useless while empty, completely out of place, and just like one… golden triangle – The warp sucked up all the trash. – Just waiting to be taken out.
– You can't be serious. – Shura pulled Kanon's hair back not so gently, so the older man would look at him, although upside down – Without you we'd have been dead! Hopeless and forgotten in the middle of nowhere! No gold cloths, no friends, no nothing! Without you we would have given up in the training ages ago!
– And what good do the gold cloths have done to you? – Shura flinched – Last time I checked you ended up a criminal, confined to the ninth hell along with Camus, while Milo got lost in his loneliness and sadness… – Kanon looked down again – If I hadn't been born, Saga would have been simply the son of a fisherman, Athena would have never been away from her sanctuary, Shion would have had more time to make better preparations to face Hades and nobody would have died by Poseidon's flood because he would still be sleeping in that jar. – Shura was horrified by the casual tone in which Kanon pointed out how the world would have been a better place without him. The Gemini just grinned. – Nothing wrong you had ever done compares, Shura, to the awful mistake of having me around.
The Capricorn turned somber
– So… was you dad wrong to keep you? Were we wrong to care about you and be your friends? Was Mu wrong to love you? Was Athena wrong to save you!? Answer me! Kanon!
Kanon rubbed his temple
– To think I've made a living out of knowing what to say or do to bind people to do my will and the day has come I completely lack the energy to get some meddling goat to leave me the hell alone... Ah, Athena, where are your enemies when they are needed? is it too much to ask for a proper excuse to take it on someone and die?
– Ah! You are two of a kind. – Mumbled Shura in Spanish, stomping in frustration, a gesture nobody had ever seen him do. Kanon looked up at him in confusion – You think the whole universe revolves round you but that is not so. Think of all the children out there who didn't get to live, all the way from interrupted pregnancies to starvation to victims of war or simple abuse and negligence. – He put his foot on Kanon's leg sort of stepping on him or pushing him… – And yet you are here whining and feeling sorry for yourselves instead of being grateful… – Kanon noticed how shaken Shura was. He stomped again and passed his fingers through his hair. The Spaniard forced himself to continue – When I killed Aioros I did saw the baby he was carrying. I had no the least idea who she was, but I did thought of killing her too, my Excalibur was ready to strike them both, yet I hesitated. I couldn't bring myself to dispose of them so I left, thinking I had been merciful, but I was wrong. There was no way any of us could ever harm her. Ask Saga who has tried to kill her three times already and failed, he is our pope now. That is because we were born bound to her, so no matter what we do we'll always return to her and we'll always be forgiven. You were born to the Gemini, and it was not by chance. Nobody else could fill your roles at this point in time. Athena had protected you since you were born, Kanon, giving you a family who would look out for you in spite of the people's fear and hatred, a father who fought every day to keep you alive until you could get here safely and friends who made sure you wouldn't die out there alone because of your stubbornness. Not only did she protected you from the rage of the sea at Cape Sounion, but let you meet Poseidon, her sworn enemy, so you had someone to take care of your training and improvement. It all so you could be here with us, where you belong…
– I'm not sure what you say helps me. You make it sound like there was not choice
– There were always choices. It could have been easier but we all chose the hard way. I could have listened to Aioros, I could have rebelled before such suspicious orders, I could have taken the baby and find her a home myself, I chose not to. Even if Athena hadn't gone to Japan, her bronze saints would have been born and come to her…
Kanon thought about it
– I've been nothing but a headache, haven't I?
– Five stars… – But the Gemini had to look up when he found his friend's hand in front of him, ready to help him up again. – If you think we are wrong, so be it. – What's all the Spaniard said. The Hellene shook his head.
– Is that your choice? – Asked the Gemini. Shura didn't yield – You are insane, goat. – He said accepting the younger man's help to stand up. Deep down, he was really glad
– That is but your opinion
– I guess I'll take advantage for the time being.
– As you wish, but help me clean Capricorn while you are at it. – Said Shura drawing a triangle in the air with his hand while giving Kanon support to walk – Some people use it as storehouse and I just can't see the end to the mess
Kanon nodded – As soon as the floor stays… – He was still dazed
– Hmm, that can take a while… care if I eat something?
– Take what you like, but don't expect much. I haven't exactly gone grocery shopping lately
– How could you if you have been leeching us out?
– It's your fault for being so kind – They both left towards Gemini private chambers without caring about their audience – But don't think this makes us even
– huh?
– I'm still talking and walking. YOU still owe me one.
– Not even if I fix you lunch?
– No.
– for a week?
– No.
– If you are expecting me to go up to a month, I'd add one more day and that's final offer.
– It's not open for negotiation.
– Darn. I should have imagined you wouldn't let me off the hook that easily
– indeed…
– It would have been easier to just pick him up and take him in – Said Angelo
– Yet, Shura made him stand for himself. – Added Shion turning to leave
– Guess Shura won't be helping us today. – Said Dokko
– Where to? – Asked Shura once in the living room. He couldn't help to notice the lack of commodities. Kanon moved towards his room so Shura took him there. He left his friend in the bed and went back to the kitchen for some water. He found the Gemini with his feet up the bed and leaning on the wall.
– I'm sorry you had to put up with such sorry show – Mumbled Kanon taking the water as Shura sat next to him. They remained in silence for a while. – I must have looked pathetic. But I wasn't trying to call the attention, I just wanted not to exist for a bit, I'm tired... Mu was right. The more I think of him, it's like I'm calling him. It's only natural he comes. I don't do it on purpose, the whole opposite. But the more I try to hide, the more obvious I become
– That is to be expected, he is your brother. – Kanon scowled – It's a shame he always reacts the wrong way, tho
– If he cared, he would come in person. He never does.
