Umino Iruka valued punctuality above all else. He was never late for work, nor had he ever called out. Even for parties-where lateness was encouraged-he was the first one there. So it was expected that Iruka was extremely annoyed when the person he was waiting for was forty minutes late.

The email had given a precise time, and Iruka knew he had not read it wrong. The dinner had been set for 9:00 p.m; not 9:15, or 9:30, and certainly not-Iruka checked the clock-9:43. What kept him from leaving was the fact he really needed this job. He couldn't return home and tell his son that he had failed.

Since the death of his parents, Iruka had been alone. No one had stepped up to take care of him, so he cared for no one else. Until he had met Naruto, and, well, it was impossible not to love him. Adopting him, especially in a small village, had been easy. Iruka had a stable, respectable job as a teacher; everyone knew him and thus they believed he was capable for this responsibility.

They practically gave Naruto to him the moment he'd asked.

But now the situation was different. They moved to Tokyo, and Iruka was stuck in a situation no parent should be in: without a job and low in savings. His decision to move to the capital had not been on a whim. He'd been invited to apply for a vacancy in one of the most prestigious universities in the country. The email had suggested he would be hired immediately.

It would have been foolish for Iruka to reject it. So the rent agreement had been signed in less than a week, and most of his money went to food, furniture, more food (this is Naruto he was talking about), and without this job, Iruka wasn't confident they wouldn't be able to afford the apartment for more than two months. But with this interview, it seemed the test of patience was included.

Iruka asked for another cup of coffee from the kind waitress. The caffeine was like a fuel to his rage. He knew he was an explosive person, especially when provoked, Iruka was dangerous. Not to say he didn't have common sense. Iruka knew to be polite first, and his days of delinquency were finished. But if his buttons were pushed-say an interviewee being nearly an hour late to the interview they arranged for-Iruka would be using his lungs for quite a while.

The fork he was running his fingers over and smudging the silver would soon be crying of abuse. Iruka wasn't just annoyed, he was anxious and exhausted. Moving from a small village to a large city was stressful, and hopefully in the end it would be worth it for his dream job.

It was more than just for achievement and money, it was for Naruto. To give his son the life he deserved. Even if it meant having to deal with Mizuki again. And Iruka had definitely been displeased to learn Mizuki was also a professor at the university. To even say the man had the dedication and intelligence for it was laughable. Still, Iruka had already sacrificed a lot for Naruto. This would be no different from selling his car and house to become neighbors with Genma and Raidou.

He loved his best friends dearly, of course, but Iruka had his limits. Raidou was a blessing on this earth, that Iruka could not deny, it was Genma that often made Iruka wonder if he was on the suffering path to become a Buddha. Genma was essentially Naruto in a grown man's body; he could drink and be loud and rival Naruto's volume. But it was hard, not to smile at the thought of him, because Iruka was thankful to have them in his life. Especially Naruto.

Standing just outside was Kakashi, who hoped his tardiness had dissuade his latest job applicant. He had worked hard this time, even guiding a kitten across the street. Kakashi wasn't sure what possessed him to go along with all this. Kotetsu and Izumo managed to convince him for the third time, and at this rate, maybe it would just be better to listen to Gai. No, forget that; it was never wise to listen to Gai unless it was about his own safety.

Okay, so, maybe Kakashi was rich and lonely and his best friends also happened to be his bodyguards. He saw no problem with that. What he saw a problem with was the fact that Izumo and Kotetsu thought his ability to be anti-social and romantically inept meant he needed to be a...Sugar Daddy. And Kakashi kept humoring them, for some odd reason.

He'd never passed the interview stage. The first time he was late enough for the candidate to give up, and the second one he had refused right away. The man had been...strangely sentimental? Kakashi had not expected to be told "I love you," right on the spot.

It was preposterous to say that Kakashi needed to find a Sugar…an escort. Yes, an escort. But what he did need to do was convince his best friends that he was capable of normally interacting with human beings on a temporary level and show Gai specifically that, no, he wouldn't find his soulmate tonight.

Entering the restaurant, Kakashi was immediately uncomfortable. People always looked at him like he was some anomaly, and it was unfortunately not because of his mask or scar. It was because of who he was. Kakashi rarely let himself be in the public eye. He was content to stay at home with his eight dogs. Humans? Humans were complicated and were an obstacle Kakashi generally avoided.

Kakashi checked his phone. According to the email, the applicant was only a couple centimeters shorter, with brown skin, brown eyes, and long hair. Right now, only one person fit the description, and he looked as angry as Gai had when Kakashi hid all of his green spandex. This was not good.

He considered going back, but his bodyguards were watching. Fans, he could deal with, overbearing aunts, sure, but angry strangers? Kakashi would rather be sat on by Bull while Gai awfully played the guitar Izumo got him for his birthday. But leaving now would only result in his friends grabbing him and dragging him right up to the table where the sleeping dragon lay.

Without wasting one more second-although he wanted to-Kakashi walked to the table. The man was only drinking coffee, and Kakashi hoped that he didn't had dinner yet. He was hungry and eating with someone just looking at you was awkward.

"Can we go to a more private table?" was the first thing Kakashi asked, and expressive brown eyes turned to him, looking confused and a little irritated at the lack of Kakashi's manners.

"I thought that you had reserved this one," the candidate said slowly, frowning, and observed Kakashi critically. The mask most likely threw him off.

Kakashi nearly cheered inwardly. No love confessions. It was already a good start. "That was a mistake. I do not eat in public."

"Were you waiting for me at another table?"

"Ah, no. Truthfully I just arrived." Kakashi smiled, his eyes curved in perfect U-shapes. "While I was on my way here, a kitten needed to cross the street, and I couldn't just let him do it alone. And then he wanted to cross again, so…" Kakashi trailed off, realizing the man sitting in front of him did not seem impressed.

The candidate just kept staring at him, as if the absurdity of the situation was just dawning on him, and Kakashi hoped he would want to end this whole thing.

"A kitten?" he asked after a moment, the fork almost bending in his hands.

Kakashi resumed smiling. "He was adorable. Small and confused."

"I'm sorry, but I heard better excuses from children, uh—"

"Hound," Kakashi offered, using the codename they previously agreed on.

The candidate blinked owlishly. "What?"

"Hound," Kakashi repeated. He frowned. If the man had not read the email in its entirety, then that was foolish. Already the candidate lost a point. How unfortunate. Kakashi would have to go home and tell his friends that the man they set him up with didn't know the first thing about being prepared.

"Okay, Hound-san," the candidate said slowly. "If you're late, just tell the truth. You're better off saying so than explaining…how you helped kittens." He got up and gestured to Kakashi to lead him to the right table.

For a moment Kakashi just stood there, realizing that for the first time in years, he'd been scolded. Even when he didn't arrive on time to meetings with politicians, Kakashi would still receive a red carpet.

Iruka looked like he wanted to fidget under Kakashi's stare, but he held his ground. "The table?"

"Right," Kakashi said. He smiled again, not a sincere one. Just the one he used to discourage arguments and pacify Gai, generally. He led Iruka to a small room in the back, that was cozy and well decorated. When they sat, a waiter arrived without much prompt, and Kakashi handed Iruka his menu. "You said children, are you a teacher?"

Confusion marred the candidate's features as he quietly asked the waiter for ice water. "Yes, I am. I thought you already knew."

"Um, sure." Kakashi tilted his head, wondering if they were somehow having two different conversations at the same time. "Would it be alright if I addressed you as sensei?"

"Not really," he said flatly, though there was a flush to his cheeks. "I would prefer it if you used my name."

Kakashi began to fold his napkin. "Which is…?"

"Umino Iruka."

"That's um—" It was cute, but Kakashi believed he would fear his life if he said so— "Right. Nice to meet you, Umino-san. Though, being named after a sea animal is quite odd."

Iruka shrugged. "Compared to Hound? I don't think so. But unless I start to balance a ball on my nose and swim in circles, I would say the name my parents gave me is only metaphorical, and I suggest you do not give me nicknames."

Kakashi couldn't help but laugh. The image Iruka's words conjured was amusing, though Iruka didn't seem as entertained as Kakashi, unfortunately.

"Sorry," Kakashi apologized sheepishly. "It was funny." Iruka's sense of humor, though not on purpose, had given him a positive point. Not to mention there was something deeply attractive about the deadpan delivery. He then cleared his throat. No, Iruka needed to be on his bad side by the end of this interview, or Kakashi was screwed.

Iruka shifted in his seat and sipped the water that had finally arrived. "So, are we going to start this interview, or will I need to wait another forty-three minutes."

"Let's order our food first," Kakashi replied. "I'll ask the questions as we wait." He propped his elbows on the table and interlaced his fingers so he could rest his chin on them.

"You decide."

"Any preferences, Iruka?" There was something nice, about saying his name, and Kakashi was absolutely delighted by the flush on Iruka's face, which was no doubt caused by Kakashi's familiarity and lack of honorific.

Iruka took a deeper breath than what was probably necessary. "Sushi." And he seemed to brace himself for more ridicule.

Kakashi decided to spare him. "Good, that means we won't argue. We can share some rolls, actually."

After they ordered, Kakashi carefully went over possible questions he could ask. He had already planned some actually, listed them, alphabetically even. But then he realized that those were what he wanted to ask Iruka. In reality, Kakashi genuinely just wanted to know more about him.

"What classes do you teach, sensei?" Kakashi grinned at the irritated glare he received.

There was that confused look again, as if Kakashi should have already known the answers to the questions he was asking. "Literature and physics are my main fields. I also teach sports, concentrating on martial arts."

"You're well-rounded," Kakashi observed out loud, more-so to himself. "Interesting. How did you find the time to become a professional in all three fields?"

Iruka rubbed the scar on his nose. "I was a double-major. Being interested in humanities and science was not uncommon at my university, while martial arts was something I initially did as a hobby until one of my masters recommended I take it up as an actual job."

"And how did you know you wanted to teach these and not, say, be a researcher?" Truthfully, Kakashi really wanted to ask about the scar, but he knew not to dig where he wasn't supposed to. He couldn't ask Iruka about his scar without revealing the story of his own.

"I grew up in an orphanage. It was over-crowded, and I was the oldest, so I was also expected to help out the caretakers." Iruka became animated, and Kakashi was fascinated. "I became passionate with teaching, I think, because of them. It was almost natural for me. So when the opportunity came, I studied my favorite subjects and even got an internship. Physics is the only science I'm good at, and Literature was mostly for my love of reading." He paused. "Please tell me if I'm talking too much," he finished sheepishly.

Kakashi smiled, genuinely this time. If Iruka wanted to spend this entire dinner talking about his passions, Kakashi was ready to let him. "Not at all. I didn't want to stop you. I'm rather intrigued."

Iruka scratched his scar again. "What else do you want to know?"

"What martial arts do you practice? Favorite genres? Do you often go back to the orphanage?"

"Judo and Kendo are what I teach, but I also enjoy Kyudo." Iruka's smile was radiant, and Kakashi felt he could get lost in it. "I like to read fiction and non-fiction, depending on my mood and how good the writer is. As for the orphanage, I visited all the time, but I moved here for the job." Iruka looked down at his water, pursing his lips.

Kakashi wished they could have met before this. "Who taught you?"

"The Sarutobi temple accepted everyone, and my caretakers practically dumped me there," Iruka said dryly. "I had too much energy, so they thought if I could focus all of it on one thing, then I would stop pulling pranks. Unfortunately that wasn't the case, but I did grow out of my mischief eventually." Iruka added the last part hastily, as if hoping Kakashi wouldn't think poorly of him.

Kakashi, by now, knew that he was screwed. Iruka continued to prove himself to be a great person. It was hard not to like him, and there was something about his expressions that Kakashi wanted to see all of them. The range of anger, embarrassment, anxiousness, and vulnerability Kakashi had witnessed in a single hour made him fascinating.

"Well, Iruka-san. I am impressed." There was no choice but to give his verdict. If he would have to pay for company, Iruka was perfect.

Iruka beamed. "I'm glad."

"Then, perhaps I can learn over the course of our companionship as to why you decided to give up teaching and be with someone like me," Kakashi said. "I don't really have much experience with this, so please do not think poorly of me. You are definitely the person I want to do this with, and I have only one request—no sex."

Iruka froze, and Kakashi panicked.

"What do you mean by that?" Iruka asked slowly, once again looking like the dragon when Kakashi first saw him.

"I mean what I said. I will not pay for sex, only for your company. Isn't that a win-win?"

The smile that curled Iruka's lips was dangerous. Kakashi could practically see Iruka imagining grabbing his ice water and throwing it right into his face.

Which was exactly what he did.

Kakashi could only blink, staring at the empty space where Iruka had been sitting and wondering what he had said wrong.

It was an understatement to say Iruka was furious. Blinded by his rage, Iruka bumped into a man wearing a forest green suit, and it nearly knocked him off his feet had the man not grabbed him just in time.

Never the one to be rude unless he had to be, Iruka smiled and apologized. "I'm sorry. I wasn't paying attention."

The man returned his smile and gave him a thumbs up. "No problem, young man. Sometimes navigating through the infinite possibilities of youth leave us lacking awareness of the world right in front us."

"Right." Iruka nodded. Best to agree.

After apologizing once more, Iruka turned and began his trek home on foot. Taxis were expensive, and he was still, unfortunately, unemployed.

Naturally, Iruka found solace in his friends. Albeit temporarily.

"Are you finished with your dramatics?" Genma asked, once again trying to pull Iruka off the couch, but the teacher just wanted to melt into the cushions and let Raidou pet his hair for the rest of his life.

"Show some sympathy, babe. Iruka lost the one opportunity for his dream job." Raidou frowned and pulled Genma to the other side of him. "No need for jealousy. I have two arms and can take care of you both."

Iruka could almost hear Genma pouting. "He didn't technically lose anything." He tugged one of Iruka's strands childishly. "The interviewer was clearly the wrong guy. Sexy, but wrong. Iruka just has to call the school, and they'll reschedule."

"Sexy?" Iruka mumbled, the cushion making him almost incomprehensible. He raised his head to see Genma smiling.

"You might as well have called him a god-oh, you're blushing. I'm right." Genma reached over Raidou to poke at Iruka's ribs. "If you didn't think he was hot, you wouldn't have gone into so much detail describing him."

Raidou intervened when Iruka threatened to bite off Genma's fingers. "I might have to agree with Genma on this one." He arched his eyebrows and slapped away Genma's hand when he attempted another assault. "You usually forget what someone looks like unless they're one of your students."

"I don't see the big deal," Iruka grumbled. He watched Genma grab Raidou's hand and kiss his knuckles. If Naruto hadn't been asleep, Iruka would have ran back into the apartment instead of endure the reminder how single he was. "He wore a mask and had a scar. That's pretty unforgettable."

Genma's grin alone would have gotten him arrested if they were in public. "Iruka, my darling, not once did you deny that he was hot."

"Alright, stop teasing him," Raidou said hastily when Iruka reached for a throw pillow menacingly. "Call the university in the morning and explain to them what happened." He stood up, forcing Iruka and Genma off of him.

Genma sighed and fell back onto the couch with crossed arms. "Neither of you are any fun." He stuck his tongue out at Iruka.

"Your fun is a type of torture that is against the law in Japan," Iruka deadpanned.

Raidou flicked Genma's nose and poked Iruka's forehead, ignoring their twin yelps. "Sometimes I forget how childish you two are." He grabbed Iruka and helped him up. "I'm glad you came to us, at least. I really did mean it when I said you can count on us now that you're here, but…" Raidou trailed off.

"We were in the middle of something," Genma finished, and Raidou stopped looking Iruka in the eye.

Iruka snorted and rubbed his warm cheeks. "Sorry-didn't mean to."

"You can come over for tea tomorrow though," Genma said and cheerfully waved. "Night!"

If Raidou appeared a little eager as he shut the door behind Iruka, well, Iruka wasn't going to mention it tomorrow or ever.

On the other side of Tokyo, Kakashi had been rereading the same sentence since he arrived home. He could close his eyes and mentally recite it perfectly because he would rather drop dead than read these books out loud with Gai in the room.

For the first time in a decade, Kakashi was not interested in Icha Icha Paradise.

"This is it," he said solemnly and tossed the book aside. "The end for me. Call a doctor."

Gai, bless his heart, ran to his side immediately and was even still wearing the forest green suit Kakashi bought him. Perhaps his bodyguard may never hear Kakashi say this, but he truly appreciated Gai and how well he took care of him, uncaring of the paycheck he received. The same went for Kotetsu and Izumo.

"Is it serious?" Gai asked, not even looking at his phone screen as he messaged the others. He pressed the back of his hand to Kakashi's forehead. "I don't feel a fever."

Kakashi groaned and childishly kicked out his feet. "It's terminal. I don't have much time left."

"By the gods, is your vision failing?" Gai quickly threw up three fingers. "How many can you see? Are they blurry?"

Kakashi shook his head. "I can see just fine. It's-" he gestured toward his book- "this. I can't read it. It's boring."

Gai recoiled and said, "it's worse than I thought." He dropped to his knees and began to cry. "Never did I think when I took this job I would be forced to prepare your own funeral. This is the sad reality of a human's worse fate-"

The door slamming open interrupted Gai's fit of hysteria, and Kakashi was thankful up until he saw the state Izumo and Kotetsu were in. Both had matching swollen lips and flushed cheeks. If Kakashi were asked to draw a conclusion from their irregular breathing, he would say that Gai's text had interrupted their very important and beneficial-to-Kakashi's-safety make-out session in one of the empty bedrooms.

"What's up?" Kotetsu asked after attempting to fix his hair.

Gai crawled away from the crouch, no doubt wishing to remain on his knees. "Kakashi's erotica no longer rouses the flames of passionate youth."

"Who do I call first, the ambulance or the psychiatrist?" Izumo asked, his internal Gai translator as skilled as Kakashi's.

"No, this is more drastic," Kotetsu answered, getting close to Kakashi, as careful as one would approach someone with the plague, and checked his temperature. "He'll need a Buddhist. This is clearly a sickness of the soul."

Kakashi swatted his hand and rolled his eyes. "Don't call anyone. I'm just distracted."

"Ah, the professor." Gai finally got off his knees and sat beside Kakashi. His wide-eyed stare was unnerving. "He made quite an impression."

Kakashi tried not to fidget. Sometimes it was alarming how Gai knew him better than Kakashi knew himself. And lying to Gai was something he could not do, so-

"He did, and I wish he didn't."

A part of Kakashi wanted to say he was angry. Iruka's departure had been unprecedented, and Kakashi didn't think he deserved that. In reality, Kakashi found that he really didn't care. The disastrous end to their meeting meant nothing in comparison to how attractively Iruka wore happiness and the range of human emotion in the low-light of the private room.

"Don't let the paparazzi hear," Izumo teased. "They'll have a field day."

Gai was practically shaking with excitement. "Rival, is your delicate heart blossoming in the valley of love? A place untrodden by men before?"

"That's a little too much, Gai," Kakashi said. "And too soon. I'm intrigued, not in love. As much as Icha Icha likes to say so, there's no such thing as love at first sight."

"Well, have you thought about seeing him again?" Kotetsu asked, and Kakashi did not like his coy smile one bit. "A little birdie told me one Umino Iruka is applying for a position at one of the universities you sponsor."

Izumo whistled. "What does Icha Icha say about coincidences?"

"It says you better stop talking or you'll lose your job," Kakashi growled and was met with laughter. Then, he found himself curious. "Wait-so it wasn't me he was waiting for at the restaurant?"

"Doubt it," Kotetsu said. "But it seems to have worked out for the both of you in the end. He's going to get his job, and you're going to finally socialize when you apologize for the misunderstanding and take him out on a date."

"I'm going to what?"

They all ignored him, chattering over their phones as they planned for tomorrow. Kakashi thought he had heard one of them mention Tsunade, and he sunk further into the couch until he was sure they would combine metaphysically.

Iruka woke up the following morning to his phone ringing. It startled him out of bed, and he was sure one of his elbows were going to be bruised from the hard fall.

Deciding to just lay there and die, he called out, "Naruto!" hoping his son would come and answer the shrilling device for him. Though he doubted Naruto would hear him with how heavily he slept.

With too much maneuvering for a grown adult with a headache, Iruka finally reached his phone on the night stand. The number was unknown, but Iruka found little in him that cared.

"Hello?" he greeted, voice hoarse.

"Is this Umino Iruka? My name is Shizune, and I work at Konoha University."

Iruka nearly dropped the phone, the device fumbling in his hands. "Right. Um, yes. This is Iruka." He looked at the clock. It was just after six, and this better be good.

"We've been informed of yesterday's incident," she said, and she sounded like the words were forcefully dragged out of her. "On behalf of the university, I apologize for the Old Perv-ah, Jiraiya's unprofessional conduct. We had expected him to arrive on time. So, the administration has decided that we would let you pass the first stage of the application due to the special recommendation of Hatake Kakashi." She paused, and Iruka could hear the sound of paper shuffling. "The second stage is an interview with the chancellor, and if you are free, we can schedule it for today at noon."

Iruka was on the verge of snapping his phone in half. "One moment," he told Shizune and set down his phone. He grabbed his pillow and screamed into it. "Noon is fine," he said after.

"Wonderful!" Shizune chirped. "It's not often Hatake-sama, let alone any sponsor, shows interest in an applicant. We look forward to meeting you."

She cut the call after they exchanged goodbyes, and Iruka pinched his hand to see if he was dreaming. From the sting it left behind, he wasn't, and what he worked so hard for was now actually happening. Thanks to Hatake Kakashi.

Whoever that was.


Thank you for reading. I hope you liked it.

(Special thanks to Sam, who betaed chapters 1 to 6)