"Where'd you guys order from? And why is the dumb bitch still here?" Hidan asked casually. I stuck my tongue out at him as he dumped his stuff on the floor and stalked over. That was apparently rather amusing to him as it put quite the broad smile on his face before flipping me off.

"Actually, this dumb bitch has been cooking for us, pretty good too, un," Deidara certainly had a way with words… screwing them up at least.

I coughed to clear my throat and raised my hand to speak, "I'd actually like to point out that I'm not a dumb bitch, thank you very much." I smiled fakely at Hidan. Some of the guys laughed, Hidan didn't even hear it, he was too busy filling a bowl with food. Disgusting. He caught the look I was giving him.

"Hey fuck off, I've been on mission for two weeks," he said with a shrug and an errant noodle dangling from his lip.

"Gladly…" I cleared my bowl and left the table. Too much testosterone for me. Although I generally liked most of the guys, they all had something unique about them.

Sasori was very level-headed and calming to be around, though he had a bit of a sassy side too. Deidara, his partner, was quite the opposite—not as vulgar as Hidan, but still up there sometimes. He was entertaining to be around, and once in a while he was even nice (emphasis on once in a while). Pain was a businessman, no-nonsense, I mostly just tried to stay in his good graces. Konan intimidated the hell out of me with her quiet confidence but she was hardly around, at least she was kind though. Kisame was fun to joke around with, I never had to worry about pushing his buttons, as opposed to his partner. Itachi was interesting… he was always calm, but I had a feeling it was just the surface I was seeing. He made me nervous in a way I couldn't really explain, which could have easily just been the stories I knew of him from my time in Konoha. Zetsu was quiet, I hadn't really talked with him because I could never find him, apparently he was away gathering information a lot of the time. I barely knew Kakuzu and Hidan, but based on what I'd experienced, that was fine with me.

But as bizarre as it seemed, especially for how I came to find myself in that crazy place, for the first time since I had left my home, I felt almost… comfortable?

Hah, it's called Stockholm Syndrome, girl.

Itachi came over and sat on the other end of the couch after dinner. I never knew how to interact with him and it usually ended with a case of verbal diarrhea on my part. So for these reasons, I pretended not to notice him in favor of feigning hyper-concentration on the closest book to me, snatching it and flipping open to a random page. The book seemed to be about plants but it was tough to say considering it was in a different language. Boy, was my plan backfiring.

"Izumi," Itachi eventually said calmly.

"Oh, hi Itachi!" I pretended to just notice him, clapping the book shut and giving him my undivided attention.

Stop being a spaz, you know he notices everything.

"We will begin the process tomorrow." He was talking about the memory recovery process. I nodded in agreement.

"Right… So do I need to do anything for it? Bring anything? Will we need snacks? I don't really know what to expect." I said, a certain timidity to my voice. My palms began to sweat. Why did they always sweat around him? I wouldn't pretend that he wasn't obviously attractive, but that should not be enough to elicit such an annoying physical response. Plenty of these guys were attractive and it didn't happen with them.

You're an idiot if you think any of them would even look twice at you.

"None of that will be necessary. We'll meet in the morning to go over the rest." His eyes flickered over me once before getting up.

"Oh and Izumi," he said before leaving.

"Yes?"

"How are you enjoying that book? I didn't know you could read latin," He asked with a raised brow. My mouth moved to make words several times as I glanced between the book and him but nothing of substance came out until I managed this gem...

"It's great, I-I just love the pictures." I quickly leafed through it, no pun intended, and noticed with a frown that there were no pictures. He seemed to be well aware of this fact too judging by the highly amused look on his face.

WHY are you like this?

"Well… this one anyway," I said, quite ruffled, snapping the book shut and slapping the cover which had an old fern drawn on it.

Smooth.

"It is a lovely fern," he agreed with a nod, still that smug sort of look on his face, and spared me any further embarrassment by leaving.

Deidara quickly took his spot. "What a fucking weirdo, huh?" he asked while simultaneously stealing the book away from me.

"Hey!" I shouted as I tried stealing it back. He held it over his head as if I wouldn't be able to reach it. Admittedly I was much shorter than him, but that was true in most cases since I came in at just under 5 feet tall, a fact Deidara and Kisame liked to remind me of often.

"Really smart, Deidara" I teased as I simply stood on the couch to reach it. Although as smart as it seemed, it was not clever enough. Deidara hopped on the couch as well and placed a hand on my forehead, keeping me at arms length.

"Hah, you're one to talk, onna," he smirked as I wind milled my arms in a sad, sad, attempt to retrieve the book. He yawned and began flipping through the pages with his free hand, feigning interest with a contemplative look.

"What the hell are you even reading?" he asked with a laugh upon realizing it was in freaking latin.

"You wouldn't understand… and this isn't fair!" I cried. He looked at me, his smile growing wider as he took note of my reddened face and heavy breathing.

"You're actually trying, aren't you?" he asked between laughs.

"Ugh!" I grunted as I reached out as far as I could to the book. His arm remained extended with my forehead on the other end of it.

"Just give up, un," He advised with a smirk. When I refused, I felt something wet on my forehead.

"Ew! Deidara, you totally just hand-licked my forehead!" I stepped away and began frantically wiping it with the bottom of my shirt. When I deemed it dry enough, I glared back at Deidara who was cracking up.

"It's not that funny," I pouted. He shrugged and sat back down with a smug little grin plastered across that face of his. "I thought it was," he doubled down.

I huffed in defeat and plopped down on the sofa as well, crossing my arms and blankly staring at the wall in front of me.

"Aw, is little Izumi mad at me, un?" He teased.

"No!" I snapped back angrily.

"I don't know, un. You sound pretty mad," he jeered playfully. I didn't want to look at him because I knew once I saw his face I wouldn't be able to maintain my angry facade, but I could feel him staring which was annoying, so I eventually gave in and turned to see him pouting. I will openly admit that his pout was much more effective than Kisame's. I had to also admit that Deidara was nice to look at and I was glad he didn't make my palms sweaty.

"What's behind this?" I asked, suddenly realizing that I'd been staring at him for far too long. I reached out to move the hair covering the left side of his face. He pulled back at first, almost out of instinct, but let me move it when he realized my intention.

"Oh that? It's my scope."

"Why do you always wear it?" I asked, feeling the scope. He allowed my fingers to trace the shiny edges.

"Because it's useful? Why do you wear clothes?"

I blushed and retorted more angrily than necessary. "That's not the same and you know it!"

He smirked and relaxed back on the couch. "I'm not so sure. We could find out though. Here, I'll take my scope off and you take your clothes off and we'll study the differences."

"Deidara!" I scolded, pulled the blanket tightly against me. He got a hearty chuckle out of this.

"I was just wondering what you'd look like without it, geez. I mean sure, I could guess, but I don't know if you're missing an eye or something," I pondered aloud with a shrug.

He stared at me skeptically as if debating whether or not he should appease my sense of curiosity. Not without uncertainty, he eventually reached up and took a moment to pull off the scope. His hair fell back into place and he blew at it from the corner of his mouth, flicking it to the side with a jerk of his neck so I could see most of his face.

"Is it as horrifying as you expected?" He asked, feigning concern and looking to me for my reaction.

His eyes were so incredibly blue it was astounding. I stared at the tiny sunburst rings that ran around his pupil as if they could hypnotize me. He wore a cocky expression that I would never admit to him was slightly endearing. After several moments of examining him, I snapped back to reality as I realized he was doing the same to me. I suddenly became ultra self-conscious and recalled he had actually asked a question what seemed like ages ago.

"Hideous," I blurted out before looking away, praying my face was a normal shade of pale and not markedly fuschia.

"Damn, that's savage Izumi. And here I was thinking I was pretty cute, un?" He whined with a cock of his head.

"I have to go to the bathroom!" I said abruptly, jumping up and stalking away with haste.

I could hear Hidan in the distance asking what my problem was and Deidara responding, "Think she's got the shits."

Good one.

I scoffed to myself, absolutely mortified. Men. You can't live with 'em, can't li—actually, I think it's fine just like that. The only problem was that I didn't actually have anywhere to go. I'd been sleeping on that couch, now Deidara was out there and I couldn't face him at that moment. He'd know I was being weird if it wasn't obvious already.

After wandering down countless corridors, I finally came to a dead end, having absolutely no clue where I was. You'd think after having been in that place for a couple weeks I would have known the layout. It was a literal labyrinth though.

At that point I was tired. Tired of walking, tired of the stupid bells chiming with each footfall, tired of trying to find my way out of wherever I had gotten myself, just tired. So I sat down for a second, but seconds turned to minutes and sitting became laying, and before I knew it I was passed out.

Whispering sounds scratched at the back of my skull, gently bringing me into wakefulness. Blinking my eyes open, I involuntarily let out a startled yelp as bright yellow orbs danced inches from my face.

"What the heck?" I cried, scooting back against the wall, one hand over my drumming heart. Zetsu cocked his head to the side in confusion.

"Did I scare you? It was kind of funny."

"You could say that," I said with a dithery laugh, still waiting for my heart rate to drop.

"What were you doing here?" He inquired out of honest curiosity.

"I guess I got lost and just fell asleep here," I admitted with a small yawn. I hate when things sound even dumber out loud than they did in my head.

"Would you like me to take you back?"

I was hesitant but he seemed sincere. His mischievous half had been relatively quiet at least.

"Um sure, thanks." I smiled at him and stood up, finally realizing how cold I was.

"You're not frightened?" he questioned, seeming somewhat stunned at my response. I looked at him for a moment, examining his expression. He was a bit child-like in a sense, showing genuine confusion over the simplest of things.

"No. Well, not enough to pass up a free escort anyway," I teased.

He smiled, and despite his pointed teeth, it was not wicked or menacing. He rose from the ground so that he towered over me. I resisted the urge to shrink away.

"Come in," he urged as his venus trap opened, and extended an arm to me. I wasn't expecting this, a simple walk back would have sufficed, but I didn't want to offend him after making him so happy. He took my hand in his, it was nearly twice the size. Pausing with me to look, he turned my hand over gently in his and traced the lines of my palm with the tip of his pointer finger. His hands were remarkably soft I'll admit, it took me by surprise.

"So tiny…" he said quietly, before giving me a small pull. I stepped into his arms and the plant cage enveloped us. It was dark but calming, although the air was somewhat sticky, it seemed to cling to my throat before being expelled.

"This may feel strange since you're not used to it. It's going to hurt."

"Wait, what?"

"Hold on" his voice was soothing, but warning at the same time.

Erhm… is there an 'eject' button in this thing?

I clutched the fabric gathered around his chest and felt his arms loop around me. I reveled in his warmth for an entire millisecond before the feeling set in. It was sickening, my stomach twisted and my head buzzed. Everything was spinning even though my eyes were closed. And suddenly, it stopped, which should have been a good thing, but it was far too abrupt. My organs tangled together and crashed against my rib cage—or at least that's what it felt like.

The trap opened and Zetsu released his hold on me. Standing upright was a tall order after that lovely little experience. I promptly tumbled from the plant, landing on my side in a fit of coughing.

"Jashin, what the fuck?!" Figures Hidan would be there to witness me at my finest. His yelling would no doubt attract the attention of others as well. Sure enough…

I had lifted myself to all fours when the nausea hit me. I groaned loudly through my coughing.

"Zetsu, did you transport her?" Itachi's voice was the first I heard beside Hidan's.

Lovely, I was so hoping Itachi would get to see me vomit.

"We didn't mean to hurt her… She's going to be sick."

I clutched my stomach with one hand as my back arched violently, my first heave producing nothing but a volatile gagging noise. Voices began to surround me but I couldn't tell them apart, everything was muddled together as my stomach churned fiercely. I faintly felt someone's hands pull the hair from my face as it all came out. My throat felt as though on fire, it spread into my nasal passage as well. Sickly heaves made way for the matter released. By the time I had finished, everyone beside Pain and Konan was in the living room watching me.

I breathed in deeply and made a face at the horrible smell. Absently realizing someone was still holding my hair back, I wearily reached up and patted their hand. "Thanks whoever this is… I think I got it from here." The hands conceded, moving from my hair to under my arms, lifting me to my feet.

"Kisame, a glass of water?" Itachi said from beside me and I realized with horror that he was the one helping me over to the couch.

"Sure thing." Kisame quickly fetched a glass for me which I sucked down greedily.

"So… how's everyone's night going so far?" I asked, looking around and feeling super weird with everyone just kind of watching me be disgusting.

"This would appear to be the highlight for most of us," Sasori conjectured.

"That's sad, you know sometimes I worry about you guys," I joked back with mock concern, rubbing at the corners of my mouth to make sure I didn't miss any puke remnants. This garnered a few chuckles.

Thank you, thank you. I'm here every night.

"You seem to be alright then?" Itachi asked, calm and even like usual. I had momentarily forgotten that he was right next to me on the couch. I swallowed and nodded.

And before that, his fingers were entwined in your hair.

I inwardly scolded myself for even thinking about it again. It's not like it was exactly a flirty scenario…

"Alright, well are we not gonna talk about how that fucking reeks and you better clean it up?" Hidan complained as he grabbed his nose and waved at the air in front of him.

"We have subordinates for that, un," Deidara snapped, to my surprise. I knew he could be nice sometimes.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Two in the fucking morning," Hidan scoffed.

"Um, you were already up, you're the last person who should be complaining," I managed to bite back despite the persisting burning in my throat. I recomposed myself before adding, "I'm sorry to wake all of you…and also for the smell. Hidan's not wrong, that is god awful..."

"You should sleep," Itachi instructed, apparently unaffected by the odor.

I nodded and everyone left the room, some eyeing me wearily. Holding the cool glass of ice against my forehead, I closed my eyes and let out a deep breath. What a night. I glanced around for a spot to set down my drink so I could get to bed.

"I'll take it, un," Deidara's voice came from behind me. His hand dipped down and plucked the half-empty cup from my hand and I watched as he moved into the kitchen, disappearing for a minute before returning as two sets of footsteps sounded distantly from down the hall.

"In here," Deidara called out before leaning against the wall with his arms folded over his chest. Two gruesome looking men appeared from the corridor behind me. One carried a mop and the other, a bucket filled with assorted cleaning products. I turned my attention to Deidara, who was watching them very intensely as they began to clean the mess I had made.

"Man, we gotta get back on leader-sama's good side," one of the men mumbled, clearly unhappy with his chore. His form was hulking, covered in leathered red skin pulled taut across his bulging muscles. The scars ran through him like lightning and every step he took was thunderous. He turned slightly and noticed me for the first time.

His eyes flickered over my frozen form, and I felt as though Medusa had set her gaze upon me. Our eyes connected for a terrifying moment, his were the blackest I had ever seen, with bright red pupils that sat diamond-like in obsidian. His lip curled into a smirk. I hadn't noticed how much I had shrunk back into the couch.

"Finish your job," Deidara said bluntly, glaring hard at the black eyed-man while keeping his composed demeanor. The man's smirk quickly faded and dripped down his face into a sullen grimace once more. Deidara glanced at me apprehensively before turning his attention back to the men who were nearly done.

I assumed that these were some of the subordinates that lived in the lowest floors of the complex. I was told not to wander down any stairs because it would be a very bad place to end up. I never really understood until then. These were just two out of who knows how many men that lived down there, and trust me when I say they didn't seem like pleasant company.

When I turned my attention to Deidara once more, he was in the same position that he had retained the whole time.

"You should go to bed, Izumi," he said as he watched the men gather everything. They were finished.

"Right…" I mumbled quietly as I pulled my legs up and huddled into a ball on the couch. I pulled a blanket over me and closed my eyes.

I'm now taking questions, comments, and personal attacks. (Reviews and subs are cool if y'all got those too :3)