EXTRA
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— I'll be back in two hours... at most. — Dick said quietly, finishing putting the mask over his eyes.
— A meeting of just two hours is not like him, Master Dick — the butler commented disinterestedly, he was more concerned with taking the book from the hands of a sleeping child — Anyway, come back soon — he asked, giving up the book.
— Do you think he wakes up before dawn?
— His nighttime habits remain as unpredictable as ever, even with tranquilizers.
Richard, now in full Nightwing suit, nodded in agreement. The two left Damian's room in silence, walked together to the Batcave without another word until the farewell:
— If you need help, just let me know.
— If Master Bruce returns first and finds out that he left with his jet, I am not going to need help... — Alfred warned.
The young hero just gave one of his smiles and then left with the jet. Whatever the reason for that departure, it should be an important matter.
Mr. Pennyworth, since he had nothing important or even interesting to do, devoted his free time to some adjustments to the new prototype "spy bird", stopping a few times to check if Damian was still sleeping. The hobby was only interrupted, in fact, when Timothy Drake's voice roared with some despair from the central computer:
— Alfred, we have a problem!
— We really have: the artificial fluff of the bird is what is causing the internal components to overheat... — replied the butler, without taking his eyes off the new prototype.
— Seriously: Bruce is in danger!
The elderly man ran to the computer, because only something truly dangerous could allow an oversight like speaking Batman's real name. Once there, he could see young Tim trying to fasten himself inside the Batmobile with his seat belt - it looked more like he was trying to tie himself up.
— What happened!?
— Joker! — he shouted in a mixture of irritation and fear, shortly afterwards with a contained laugh — he is using the gas, but it is different...! — He laughed, long laughs that made him lose his breath — It is different, Alfred... cct slowly, imperceptibly... And Bruce is there with him... — He laughed again, a macabre laugh in which his lips curved in a threatening smile as he continued to laugh, though he was barely breathless.
Alfred was silent and started to press a few keys. Soon afterwards, it was possible to hear the following warnings coming from the car's system: "Manual control privileges canceled"; "Ignition started"; "Permission to initialize weapons and listen granted". And so, with the Batmobile under his control, Alfred managed to drive him across the abandoned terrain of a slaughterhouse - a place full of henchmen of the clown, some still standing like the living dead and others already lying on the ground, simply dead.
He put down the door of one of the refrigerators, where it was pointed out as Batman's location. Indeed, there was the bat: inert, hanging from the back on hooks, face to face with a large scren that showed the Catwoman; beside him was the Joker, laughing and clapping.
— Oh, no farewell tears? — The clown pretended sadness, soon after laughing and holding one of the guard's hands and standing up in a rough attempt to wave — Come on, Selina, say goodbye too! Hey, Selina! Hello! — He let go of Batman's hand, scratching the back of his neck and chin — Hey, did I put the wrong wires? — He was irritated and stamped one of his feet — Great, my whole speech was down the drain! Not that you're not a good listener, Batsy, but I wanted tears instead of that stupid smile...
Alfred took advantage of that distraction of the Joker to bring the Batmobile closer. When he already had the clown in his sights, in a position that guaranteed to hit only him, the bastard walked away and started zigzagging around the room. He laughed, ran, jumped and laughed even more - that hideous laugh resounded in every corner of the refrigerator.
He was joking, because he knew that the car's mobility inside that place was impaired - the tracks were still there, abandoned and covered with dust and blood stains. At one point in that cat and mouse game, when the armored vehicle had already managed to knock down part of the obstacles, Joker found himself using a sadistic and fun alternative to end that night:
The clown ran and, with enviable agility, jumped on Batman and climbed him. He did not insist on being delicate, on the contrary, he did everything so that the tugs in search of stability would contribute to further tear the bat's back. The maniac was quieted only when he was safe enough, hugging the enemy with his legs and one arm, while using the other to wave at the Batmobile.
— Cars still don't fly, lucky me! — He laughed — You know, Batman... I like you. Not really! I like you and all that stuff that makes you hit me, arrest me, I run away and kill people... and that's why I DON'T LIKE her... — He pointed at the screen, Selina was still as focused as before — Don't look at me like that, you know it will ruin all this special thing that we have...
Batman remained inert, much to Alfred's despair. The most the butler could do in that situation was to start slowly approaching their Batmobile - if it couldn't reach the Joker, at least it would serve as a support for the bat.
— It's not you, it's her...! — Joker smiled and took something from the suit pocket, a detonator — You know what they say: curiosity killed the cat! — He laughed, a mocking and uncontrollable laugh that echoed all over the place. He pressed the detonator against one of Batman's cheeks, which was immobilized in a forced smile.
The screen, which previously showed Selina, was filled with bright orange light before it lost its signal.
It was over.
Joker, smiling from ear to ear with his performance in that little battle, decided that it was time for a triumphant exit: he let go of the bat and went down to the ground again - they were at a small height of just over a meter - and, as a courtesy, he decided to help Batman down as well, pulling him by the feet so that he fell on the floor after cutting the skin that held him in the hooks.
— You don't need to thank me, Batsy! — he said clapping his hands together, as if he had just done a hard job — These tears of yours are more than enough... — And after that, the clown turned around and left calmly, laughing - because he had the absolute certainty that he would not be followed by anyone, not after triggering the happy gas inside that abandoned building.
Tim Drake, Robin Red; he laughed and cried at the same time, a nervous cry, as he hugged himself and tried to contain his body shaking. The little air he managed to gather in his lungs only served to make him laugh even more, even though he was desolate - he never imagined that the reason for all this was the CatWoman.
One of the few things the boy saw before he completely lost hope was Batman trying to move his feet, which could have been a good thing, if his laughter – low and loud - had not started to resound all over the place. This made Tim go into despair, dropping his head on the locked steering wheel of the vehicle while his body shook with every laugh he gave himself.
Alfred, who watched everything from afar by the monitors, was eager to go and help them. However, before he could take any vehicle and simply leave, the computer alerted him to something:
— Reception of data allowed by privileges of the handle, starting download.
— Computer, show location! — the butler ordered.
— Location: east coast of Metropolis. Docks. Shed 21.
— Computer, location of Selina Kyle!
— Not found.
— Selian Kyle's last location!
— Location: east coast of Metropolis. Docks. Shed 21.
— How long ago!?
— ... 19 seconds ago, 20 seconds ago, 21 seconds ago...
The butler moved away from the computer, defeated before he even went to the rescue.
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NOTE
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Everyone knows the Joker, but not everyone knows the notorious Happy Gas he uses. In fact, this compound is a mixture of hallucinogens and asphyxiants, one of the effects of which - besides rapid death - is laughter. The chemical compound of this mixture even appeared in the comics (Detective Comics, Impostors Among Us - where several infected people become Jokers, n. 867 if I'm not mistaken), the mixture takes: methamphetamine and ecstasy (as hallucinogenic drugs); nitrous oxide (laughter gas itself); cyanide and strychnine (as asphyxiating). It's too expensive a mix, so here's one of the reasons why the Joker is robbing…
I consulted the video called "Conheça a Fórmula Secreta do Gás do Riso" by Detona Química on YouTube - my days of love for chemistry are long gone.
