Content Warning: Long as fuck and sexually explicit
"Don't look!" I shrieked, pulling the half-worn dress against me as much as I could to cover myself.
"In case you hadn't noticed, you're in my fucking room!" he bellowed back incredulously.
"Fair, but in my defense, I didn't think you were in here," I whined and looked exasperated between him and the dress.
Now this put a highly amused look on his face.
"Ah yes, my own fucking room, pretty odd place for me to wind up. You'll have to excuse me." He feigned apologetically as he crossed his arms over his bare chest and leaned coolly against the bathroom doorframe.
I huffed. "Can we go back to the part where you don't look?"
He ignored my question. "You know, if you'd just ask. Maybe, just maybe, I'd help." He said, cocking his head arrogantly.
He'd gotten to use that line on me once before and oh, was he getting joy out of it again.
I glared at him, looked back down at my predicament, then back to him. I offered a defeated look and a whine.
You got a white flag? No? You could try waving that dress around.
"Close enough," he let out a low chuckle as he pushed off the doorframe and approached.
"Turn around," he said, his hands moving across my shoulders and turning me away from him. I'm not entirely sure what he was doing to fix the mess I had made but he seemed proficient at it.
Fingers hooking into straps and pulling them into the right place, latching clasps, tying ties. The whole nine yards.
"So you changed your mind about wearing this, huh?" He asked with a certain air of satisfaction as he fastened some tassels in back, his fingers brushing up and lingering against the bare skin of my spine in the process.
I wanted to turn around and shoot him a snarky look, call him out on lying about the dress not being stolen. But I didn't dare turn around, I could feel the heat of my own face and I was sure it was at least 20 shades of pink.
"Well I thought I could at least try it on… didn't realize women's clothes could be so complicated..." I muttered. I decided to let him have this one for now.
"You say that like you've never worn a dress," he noted with a snort.
"Just the once," I replied quietly, thinking back to my time at Gorzo's mansion.
At that very moment, I felt Hidan's hands slide beneath the dress from the bottom and travel up along my thighs. His fingers found the hem of the bunched-up slip and he pulled it down with a slight tug.
My mind flashed with images of that man, Gorzo.
I could practically feel his hands on me again, pressing against my flesh, rising up my skirt, holding me in place, tearing at my underwear. His weight against me from behind, feeling him from behind… feeling helpless beneath him.
My heart seemed to beat with a shockwave that pulsed through my entire body. I was dizzy. My face went numb and I suddenly felt like I couldn't catch my breath.
"Almost done," Hidan said, seemingly unaware of the chaos existing only in my head. His hands had since traveled to the straps one last time to adjust them properly, but I still felt Gorzo grabbing at my thighs.
What was wrong with me?
Why couldn't I breathe? My fingers had also begun to go numb and I could feel them trembling against my will.
"Done. Let's see then." Hidan announced and stepped back.
I could still hear the amusement in his voice. I had been amused only moments ago too but now I felt like I was spiraling out of control. I couldn't seem to move at all.
"Oi, earth to Izumi. That means turn the fuck around," he jeered impatiently. When he grabbed my shoulders to spin me around, my body flinched away involuntarily. I knew it was Hidan but I couldn't stop feeling him.
"The hell's your problem?" He asked with sudden annoyance. Turning me around with more force so that I actually faced him.
I don't know what my face held when he looked at it but I had never seen so much confusion on his. His amethyst eyes were intense and flickered over my form with knitted eyebrows.
My trembling hands, my absolutely pale face which only moments ago held more color than I ever wanted, my chest rising and falling quickly as if I had just run a mile. He noticed all of it.
"For the love of Jashin, what did I do now?" He threw his hands in the air in frustration.
I was so embarrassed. I had no good explanation. I just shook my head, tears forming at the corners of my eyes and overflowing quickly down my cheeks which only embarrassed me more.
"I'm so sorry, I don't know what's happening," I managed to eke out as I brought my hands up, staring at them hard, willing them to stop shaking and for the numbness to recede. I rubbed my face frantically, wondering why I couldn't feel my own touch.
Hidan's eyes didn't move from my form, though his frustration seemed to recede.
"Is it Orochimaru? That blood shit?" he asked, grabbing my wrists to examine me.
Again, I saw Hidan touching me. I knew it was just him logically, but I saw Gorzo flash in my mind again. A surprised gasp flew from my mouth and I tore my wrists back and held myself by the shoulders.
"Hey," Hidan bent down to look me in the eye. I must have been seeing things because his expression seemed to soften, on anyone else I would call it concern.
I met his gaze and recalled his question. I shook my head.
"No… it's him, I don't know why I'm remembering him right now," I said through a sob.
I hated the way I sounded. Why was I always in distress? Orochimaru was one thing but this… shouldn't I have more control over this?
"Him?" Hidan questioned, straightening up.
"That guy... from the mansion," I said, my voice tight as it squeezed through my throat, straining to get through a sentence without sobbing.
Hidan looked truly confused which made me feel even more guilty. He was actually being nice and this is what he got in return? An emotional mess to deal with?
"Hey, look at me," He said, noticing my darting eyes averting his own. He tucked a finger under my chin and forced me to meet his gaze. He bent down to my eye level again.
"You're having an anxiety attack. They fucking suck but I promise you will be okay. Let's get your breathing under control, alright?" He was calm. Weirdly calm.
Are you sure this is the same Hidan we know?
I watched as he climbed onto the bed, shuffling the pillows about so he could sit upright against the headboard. His legs extended and spread out in front of him.
"Come on," he said, patting the space between his legs. I wasn't sure what was happening but I wanted to trust him. I needed this feeling of impending doom to take it's leave.
"I can't feel my fingers. I can't feel my face," I expressed in a panic, rubbing my forehead and twisting my fingers about in an attempt to force more blood into them.
"I know, I know. Come on," He reiterated, holding his hand out. I put my much smaller hand in his and he pulled me onto the bed, situating me to sit in the space between his legs, mine splayed out against his and my back against his chest.
"There we go. Not so bad, right? Can you feel me breathing?" He asked before taking an exaggerated breath.
I nodded, trying to muster the same level of calm he had in that moment. I could feel his chest rise and fall beneath me.
"We're going to breathe in deep, hold, and then let out." He directed.
Again, I nodded. I couldn't find the words to express how stupid I felt or how grateful I was that Hidan was actually helping me through this.
I sucked in as much air as I could and held it, shakily letting it out when I felt Hidan decompress beneath me. Much of my back and shoulders were exposed. Pressed against his bare chest, I could feel his immense warmth radiating through me.
"Good. We're just gonna keep doing this," he said, his hands travelling up to hold onto the sides of my shoulders. Where I could only see and feel Gorzo before, I finally felt some comfort. He grasped onto them gently, moving up and down slowly in an attempt to warm me up maybe.
I focused on my breathing and didn't even tell myself it was wrong to revel in the comfort of his hold. I'd been so overwhelmed by my previously dormant feelings toward Hidan and my still lingering ones for Itachi and I just didn't have the emotional bandwidth to deny myself this pleasure.
I closed my eyes and let myself sink into him. The tears stopped and my breathing became more natural over time. Hidan felt so warm beneath me that I eventually found myself drifting off.
"You're not falling asleep on me again, are you?" Hidan's voice was playful, he was trying to keep things light. I appreciated him.
"Well, not anymore," I retorted, my voice still a bit quiet, though thankfully it had lost the tremor.
"Hey, there she is," Hidan joked, squeezing my shoulders slightly. "I mean, you could and I wouldn't hate it. I did recently take a leak so I guess I won't have to get up for a while."
I laughed lightly through a relieved exhale. It seemed the worst was over and Hidan didn't hate me for it somehow. I still did though.
"What if you have to poop?" I asked thoughtfully.
Valid question.
"Then I'd really be nice and toasty," he said as he wiggled his butt deeper into the bed.
I snorted. "You're disgusting."
"Don't fuck it til you try it," he said.
"That's… not how the phrase goes. That doesn't even make sense."
"My bad. Don't try it til you fuck it, right?"
"I need you to stop."
"Say that again without the last two words," he said with an audible smirk.
"Hidan…" I scolded half-heartedly.
"Izumi…" he parroted me.
I sighed. Not in a bad way either. The luxury of being able to sigh was nice, it meant my breathing was alright. So much so that I could afford to let out a big one.
"Hey, Hidan?" I asked quietly.
"Hm? What's up?"
"How… how did you know about all that stuff?"
"What stuff?" He questioned.
"The anxiety attack and the breathing stuff."
At this he let out a chuckle before answering matter-of-factly, "Just because I'm a fucking monster now doesn't mean I was never human. I do remember a few things."
His answer surprised me into silence. There really was more to him than I gave him credit for. He had been terrible to me in the past, yes.
He called me "bitch" for weeks before he ever called me by name. But I was beginning to see another side that made me wonder if he was just broken like the rest of us and dealing with it in his own way. Granted, his way was very unique.
He broke the silence after a while. "Sooo… you wanna tell me about it?"
"What?" I asked bewildered.
"Sweetheart, people don't just have anxiety attacks over nothing."
Psh… bet you could prove him wrong one of these days.
"Oh, that..." I realized what he meant. He stayed quiet, waiting for me to continue.
I clicked my tongue, about to launch into it but found my breath caught in my throat. I had swept it under the rug and sat on it for so long that I didn't even know how to begin.
"I-I'm sorry, it's hard to talk about for some reason. It's… embarrassing somehow, this whole thing." I gestured to us in general and the room before letting my hands fall back down and fidgeting with the hem of my dress. "I don't know where to start."
"So I walked into that fucking mansion… " Hidan did a wretched impression of me and began the story, trailing off expectantly.
"Right," I rolled my eyes at the impression and breathed in. "So I walked in and somehow managed to get picked…"
"Yeah, somehow," Hidan interjected with an incredulous snort.
"...anyway… I knew you guys were supposed to be outside so I kept trying to get him to bring me to the garden."
So far so good.
"Mhmm," Hidan affirmed, encouraging me to continue, his hands moving from holding my arms to draping across my collar from behind in a sort of limp but comforting hug. My heart nearly skipped a beat and I froze, finding myself thinking about the feeling of his broad arms weighing down on me instead of talking.
"Oh, my bad," he said as if he didn't realize what he'd done. He began to pull his arms away. My hands quickly reached up to keep his in place.
"No, I, um… I like it," I confessed, my little fingers curling around his thsurely aick forearms and my chin resting on top of them. He didn't protest. I imagined the sly little smile adorning his face.
"Mm. Anyway," he said.
"Anyway," I continued, trying to push past my awkwardness. "So he started just kind of… well, he was strong… much stronger than me, anyhow. And then he was kissing me, my neck and he... well I knew I wouldn't be able to convince him to leave with me, not before he... um, well you know."
Wildly descriptive. A+. Have you considered a career in writing?
Hidan shifted slightly beneath me and I felt his forearms tighten. I'm not sure he even realized he was doing it but he seemed agitated.
"Mhm," he said again, a noise I think was meant to prompt me further, though it sounded oddly controlled, like it was pushed through a clenched jaw.
I did go on, though.
"I really did want to complete the job for you guys, like… a lot, but I had never um…" I shook my head, frustrated with myself that I couldn't find the right words, "...what he wanted from me, I had never done that before. I was just… scared, I think. And he was just so much stronger… you know? And I know you would have stopped him easily if you were there, but it was just me."
I felt a slight pressure against the side of my head and I allowed it to tilt with a close of my eyes, Hidan's lips pressing into my hair. I could hear the inhale and exhale through his nose as he stayed there. His arms wrapping just a little tighter.
It caught me off guard, a remarkably sweet gesture from the brashest man I knew. It felt like he was saying sorry with it, that it was okay now.
"Go on," he whispered against my hair.
I swallowed and pushed down the butterflies.
"It was so bizarre, he... almost seemed to like that I was scared? I was so stupid… and his blankets were so freaking slippery. I mean, in what world would crawling across silk sheets work against someone who just needs to grab my ankle?" I laughed, the humor of it dulling the memory a bit. "So as you might imagine, he pulled me back against him…pretty uh, pretty easily."
I had to pause. Hidan said nothing, I couldn't even feel him breathing anymore. I took a deep breath.
"and he was just so much stronger, um, like I said. So he um… well that was when he pulled off my… um... "
"Fuck. God fucking damnit, Izumi," the sheer volume of his voice in the otherwise quiet room combined with his frustration startled me. Hidan's hands pulled out of my weak grip and flew to his temples, rubbing them as if he had a headache.
I quickly maneuvered around to look at him, absolutely bewildered.
"What? What's wrong?" I asked wide-eyed.
"I fucking… UGH, I fucking knew it. I fucked it up. I reminded you of him just then, didn't I?"
I stared at him like a deer in headlights. He continued on in a rage.
"That fucking… did he...? ...What did he do to you?"
I swallowed hard, shaking my head. I knew what he was asking.
"Nothing you don't already know about. I stopped him before it got too far."
He breathed a sigh of relief but it was still riddled with disgust. "But he would have. You literally had to fucking kill him to stop it from happening. And then here I am, putting my fucking hands on you and reminding you of him."
I was shocked to see him like this. It was almost like he was only talking to himself and I was just witnessing it.
"Are you... mad at me?" I asked hesitantly.
He gawked at me incredulously. "You?! Don't be fucking stupid, why the fuck would I be mad at you?"
I looked around frantically like I might find an answer somewhere else. "I don't know, you just seem so upset after I told you what happened."
"Oh, for fuck's sake Izumi. Do I have to spell it out for you?"
I had no answer, I just shrunk into myself staring back at him. Why was he so mad? It seemed like he basically knew all of this before I even said it.
"I mean look at you, even now you're fucking scared of me," he threw his arms in the air in defeat and laughed without humor.
"I'm n-" I tried to get a word in edgewise. I suppose I did manage precisely one.
"I fucking let that happen back then and I'm apparently still fucking making you relive it. No fucking wonder I couldn't fucking compete with him."
Couldn't compete with him…? What was he even talking about?
Hidan continued ranting through my dumbfounded silence.
"So that's just it, huh? I'll never be able to fucking touch you without you thinking of that," he said bluntly with realization, staring up at the ceiling while tapping the back of his skull against the wall repeatedly, fingers linked together atop his hair.
It replayed in my head like an echo.
I'll never be able to fucking touch you without you thinking of that...
I wasn't imagining he said that, right? Because if not, that would mean he wanted to be able to touch me in some form or another and for once he wasn't coming on to me in a joking manner.
That was more than enough to renew the hammering of my heart.
"Hidan…" I looked at him, my brows meeting at the worry lines.
He didn't make a move or even look at me.
"Hidan," I said more forcefully, positioning myself even closer to him. I sat on my knees between his legs, my arms outstretched and holding myself up on his wide shoulders, my face a foot from his as I tried to grab his attention.
"Hm?" He grunted, tearing his eyes from the ceiling to meet mine. Hands still locked on top of his head.
What are you doing?
I searched his face for some hint of what I could do, but he only gazed back at me with a frustrated, defeated expression.
What are you doing?
I shook my head. I shook it at everything he had been saying. I didn't know how to put into words that he was wrong. I was too flabbergasted in finding out that he cared to this extent. I knew he was a flirt and potentially wanted to partake in certain… activities with me. But that was all physical.
His reaction to my distress, I couldn't help but wonder at the breadth of his feelings towards me. It was true that every single member of the Akatsuki was tragic in some way, and it was painfully obvious in that moment that Hidan had more demons than he let on.
He was able to help me through my trauma but seemingly incapable of processing his own.
What are you doing?
"Hidan…" I said softly, begging him to get out of his own way and just listen to me.
My hands moved from his shoulders to the sides of his neck, the tips of my fingers combing into the edges of his hair. His expression became even more pained before he shut his eyes entirely.
"The fuck are you doing?" he asked the same question I'd been asking myself. "I don't need you to try and comfort me. I'm the one that fucked u-"
I cut him off, my lips pressing against his abruptly.
He didn't fight it, he didn't even move. My stomach flipped and nearly entered my throat as I held him there for seconds before I broke away, breathing heavily, eyes wide.
What did you do?
His eyes were as wide as mine. We sat in silence just staring at each other, processing what had happened.
"I-I'm so sorry," I suddenly stuttered out, shaking my head and covering my face with my hands, feeling the heat of my cheeks emanating through my palms.
Look at Hidan. Just look at him. Why on earth would a guy like that have any interest in a girl like you?
He's just feeling confused.
Remember what happened with Itachi?
My alter was practically begging me to stand down but there was no time to heed the warning.
His large hands wrapped around my wrists, pulling them away from my reddened face. I fought against him which was beyond useless. Opening my eyes, I was immediately met with his expansive pupils that left only a thin ring of color at the edge of his violet irises.
He did not blink, he only flickered his gaze between my own and my lips.
Much to my embarrassment, as he did this, the breath audibly hitched in my throat as I felt something needy stir within me, some affection I'd held for the man but kept out of reach in a far corner like it was an animal I was afraid to let out of it's cage for fear of not knowing what it would do.
Not knowing if it would hurt me.
That was all he required. His brow knitted together and arched up in an expression that told me he had that same need within him. His grip became tighter on my wrists and his mouth overtook mine in an instant.
I gasped at the feeling of his lips moving against my own. It was nothing like my previous, admittedly minimal experience. He didn't have much of a gentleness to him, if any at all.
No, he was all raw force and possessiveness and he absolutely dominated my mouth in a way that left me feeling like I was caught in his current and all I could do was trust that he would keep me afloat wherever he was sweeping me off to.
It wasn't feverish though, not at first. He was confident and purposeful in his force.
He loosened his grip on my wrists, allowing my body to lean against his as his hands found their way into my hair. He held me steady as he continued to kiss me in a passionate display of power.
"Hidan" I exhaled his name, my breath coming out in uncontrollable waves.
A low groan escaped him upon hearing his name. He pressed his mouth against mine even more hungrily and I met him with the same appetite.
My head swam with this overpowering feeling of yearning, a warm pit growing and growing inside my core. It seemed to tell my body exactly what to do and how to move on it's own.
I just needed to be closer to him. My legs edged forward and positioned themselves on both sides of him.
"Fuck…" He whispered through his teeth as I straddled him, breaking away from the kiss with a ragged breath. He tightened his grip on my hips, pulling me down against him.
My half-lidded eyes grew in surprise, feeling something hot and hard pressing against my most sensitive area. I almost cried out at the sensation but I muffled myself, burying my face into the crook of his shoulder. This only made him squeeze my hips harder and loose another expletive in a drawn out growl.
Everything was happening so fast.
I wondered if it was what I wanted while simultaneously thinking I would explode if I couldn't have it. He pulled me down against him once more, this time thrusting his pelvis upward to grind against me.
I couldn't help but let out a small cry before biting into his shoulder to mute myself, drawing out another low growl from Hidan.
I was still so new to these sensations, my body seemed like it was doing all it could to take them in stride, the overflow pouring from me in a series of puffing gasps.
What if you sleep with him...
Feeling him pushing against my entrance, even through our clothes, sent uncontrollable tremors through my legs and I felt like at that point I was just holding onto him for dear life.
And it turns out like Itachi all over again?
I didn't think I could handle something like that again.
"Izumi…" The way in which my name tipped off his tongue had me sighing.
My legs continued to quiver and shake. I wished they wouldn't do that.
"Izumi… sweetheart… hey..."
I couldn't seem to respond through my breaths. I was trying to focus on making my legs stop doing that.
He moved his hands up to my shoulders and began to push me off him. I didn't want him to see my face, I didn't know what it looked like. I felt totally out of control. Even though he could easily overpower me, he didn't force me back.
"You're fucking shaking," his voice was deep and gravely through his heavy panting. My entire body hitched as I felt him roll against me once more.
"I-I'm sorry," I admitted, feeling embarrassed once again by my body's reactions.
"No… that's not what I mean. If I'm being completely honest, it's a huge fucking turn on but…" he sighed, "but I… fuck… are you okay?" He whispered as he pushed me back once more, that time I let it happen.
He took one hand to brush the hair from my eyes, leveling our sights with a downward tilt of his head.
"I… I'm not sure," I admitted through my panting breath, feeling completely flustered and abashed.
"Did I fuck up again?"
I shook my head vigorously. I didn't want him to think he did anything wrong, but there was no way I could tell him the truth. Instead I opted for burying my face in his shoulder.
Nah, you're fine, just thinking about how Itachi screwed me and decided I wasn't good enough. Thinking you might do the same. I dunno.
Yeah, no. I didn't need to freak him out with that level of crazy up front.
"Talk to me, sweetheart. Fuck me up with the truth. Was it him again?" He asked into the top of my head. His arms were heavy around my back and shoulders. I knew he was talking about Gorzo.
I liked how safe I felt against his chest. Safe enough to say something at least.
"No, it's not that… I'm sorry, I feel so dumb. I think it's just...a lot for me all at once."
I wasn't technically lying.
I could feel the sigh across the top of my head.
"Fuckin... I can't believe I'm fucking saying this…" He muttered with a pained voice.
I waited on edge for whatever he was going to say.
"Stop, we should… fuck…"
He paused for a second.
"Fuck, that's not right," he mumbled before trying again.
"I mean... fuck, we should stop." He sighed again with exasperation. "God that was harder to say than it should have been..." he muttered to himself.
My stomach dropped. I pulled back to look at him. I knew why I didn't want to continue, but what reason could he have? He was so into it only a moment ago.
So it was Itachi all over again, except he didn't even want me to begin with.
Maybe it was better that way though...
"Is... there something wrong with me?" I asked weakly, looking away and feeling like an absolute idiot.
"God, Izumi, no. No, fucking no. That's so not it. Hey, fucking look at me," he grabbed my chin roughly and held my face inches from his. "I want you, okay? Really fucking bad and that's putting it lightly."
"You can literally fucking feel how bad I want you."
I really could. It was… a lot.
Hidan tilted his head back against the wall and cursed himself once more.
"I just… only ten minutes ago you were crying over that fucking fuckboy. I don't want him to be anywhere close to your thoughts when we fuck."
Interesting use of 'when' over 'if'.
I cringed at his crassness. He didn't seem to notice or at the very least, it didn't hinder him.
"Plus you're all shy and shit, so let's just…" he paused with a rumbling, straining noise caught in his throat, truly in disbelief of the words coming out of his own mouth, "...take a fucking beat and fucking relax about the whole thing, alright?"
I smiled weakly at him and nodded, taking a deep breath and trying to relax as he suggested. I sank down a bit on the exhale and froze with gasp.
Hidan let out a noise that vaguely sounded like "hyngggg" as I accidentally pressed against the still very erect bulge beneath me.
"I-I'm really sorry… did I hurt you?" I stammered nervously.
"Hurt?!" He laughed incredulously. "No, but fuck if you're not making this the most difficult decision of my life." He groaned.
"I need a cold shower" he said, his brows knitted as he pinched the bridge of his nose and I tried not to think about Itachi.
"And before you ask... no, sweetheart, you can't join me… but you can watch," he added with a wink.
His hands slid back down to my hips so he could carefully remove me from his lap, cursing to himself the entire time. He set me aside and stood up, looking back down at me once more.
I tried to make eye contact but I was completely distracted by the erection that was painfully noticeable through his black pants. He noticed me looking and grinned.
"Like what you see?" he asked, standing to the side, hands on his hips as he leaned back in a way that thrust them forward.
It was truly amazing how he managed to jump between sweet and vulgar in an instant.
I went beat red and immediately snapped my eyes away muttering another apology.
He just laughed and leaned back in for another kiss, lingering on my lips before planting one on my jaw, then one on my neck. Another on the neck. I found my head lolling to the side to give him more access, a barely audible moan escaping my lips.
I felt his own lips pause before smiling against my neck.
"Goddamn…" He muttered before breaking away to look down at me, biting his lip like he was imagining a thousand different things he'd like to do with me. I leveled his gaze with my own, all big eyes and chewing my lip as well, a question behind it that I wasn't sure if I should vocalize.
"What's up?" He asked, the question apparently visible in my expression to even him.
"I…um, well… were you serious?" I asked with a nervous pause. He cocked his head to the side, clearly needing a bit more.
God, he was going to make me say it.
"When you said… I could watch?" My fingers absently set to picking at my nails as I awaited his response.
Um, where did you find that audacity and where can we get more?
I expected an arrogant smirk. An "I knew it, you are a pervert" kind of satisfaction to his countenance. But that wasn't it.
His lips parted just slightly with a sort of disbelieving breath, irises darkening beneath his furrowing brow. He was staring at me very seriously, perhaps trying to figure out if I was the one joking around. But I clearly wasn't.
I couldn't help but notice the twitching movement in his pants, the thought of me watching him pleasure himself was apparently something very exciting to him.
"I wasn't," he said, causing my face to burn with embarrassment before he had a chance to follow up, "but I am now."
He stepped toward me, arm extended. I took his hand and he pulled me off the bed to my feet. He had to bend down quite a bit to plant another kiss atop my head. In keeping his massive hand around mine, I trailed behind him into the bathroom where he immediately set to turning on the showerhead.
The hot torrent quickly filled the room with steam. I stood watching him test the temperature, not really sure what to do with myself and wondering if this was a curiosity I really needed to sate after all.
When he turned back to me though, the look in eyes as he appraised my diminutive form compared to his own, I knew it was something I very much wanted to witness.
"God, that dress is sexy on you, sweetheart," he muttered, his eyes lingering on me before glancing over to the countertop.
"Yep, that'll fucking do," he said to himself, his hands suddenly on me, lifting me from under my thighs to sit atop the counter, carelessly knocking a few things over.
I went to pick them up.
"Leave it. I don't care about that right now."
I swallowed and nodded.
He stepped back and surveyed me, gears turning behind those hungry eyes. I allowed my gaze to travel downwards and made note that nothing had changed at his waist.
He remained equally excited, if not more.
Closing in on me again, apparently coming to some sort of decision, he tousled his fingers through my hair to leave it disheveled. Hooking a finger in the thin dress strap, he tugged it down so it fell off my shoulder. Hands on the inside of my thighs, he pulled them apart.
He was posing me, I realized. Prepping me to look a certain way.
Was he intending on just looking at me while he…?
I found myself breathing heavily as I watched him. His eyes ravaged across me as he tugged the dress down so my modest breasts became that much less modest.
"Fuck… fuck, I want to fuck you," he whispered as he stepped back to regard me once more.
I swallowed at his shameless admission. I did more than that, I absolutely reveled in it.
It was so foreign to me… to be the object of anyone's lust, and yet it seemed to be happening so much lately. I felt wrong for liking it as much as I did... but I couldn't deny it.
In a quick motion he was upon me once more. He captured my jaw in his left hand and bore down on my lips with his own and just like that, we were kissing again.
It wasn't my plan, I wasn't even sure it was his. He wasn't really one for calculation or plans, a bold departure from my only previous experience.
He was immediately wrenching my mouth open with his tongue and as he powered his against mine, his hand released the tight grip on my jaw, sliding down, fingers moving to curl and wrap around my throat.
"Ahhm…" It was like he had squeezed the soft, wanting noise out of me.
I didn't have a chance of holding it in.
It surprised me as much as it did him when it puffed out of me. When I expected him to pause, pull back and smirk at the victory he'd pulled from my lips, cocky in the lewdness he managed to produce within me, he did not.
Not exactly anyway.
He did withdraw to look at me, but kept his face close. Those amethyst eyes of his, so very darkened and intense, flitting across my face like he was checking for something.
"You like this, sweetheart?" he asked, letting his fingers relax, adjust and flex to hold my neck firmly once more.
I had been asking myself the same thing, or rather why I liked it so much when it felt so dangerous. I knew it was dangerous as it had actually happened to me before.
But this was different... It was controlled… and it was Hidan.
I was beginning to realize I quite liked to be controlled. At least in this capacity.
Seems potentially problematic. Let's ignore that, shall we?
Indeed.
I was sheepish in my eventual response but I managed a quiet, almost shameful "yes".
"Mmm… yeah, I can tell you do," he said with a tilt of his head.
"Just look at this face…" His thumb pressed up against the corner of my jaw, angling my face to the other side. He seemed to be taking me in from every perspective.
"It's nothing to be embarrassed by," he said, still examining me, my admission clearly an uncomfortable one. He gave a small squeeze on my neck. My breath hitched and the pressure spiked between my legs.
If you say so. That settles that, then.
I was quick to want to accept this as a fact.
His eyes lulled as he moved in for another kiss. His lips pressed against mine and I couldn't help but notice this one was different. He would always be dominant, I suspected, but even so it was softer somehow.
It contrasted so strangely with his fingers pressing into the sides of my throat. His lips moved against mine slowly and his tongue did not force its way in. It slid across my bottom lip, asking for entry.
I'll allow it.
Somehow even this gesture carried his insane confidence. Asking was clearly only a formality. I happily parted my lips accompanied by a soft sigh. He returned one of his own, albeit deep and guttural.
It was a long, languid kiss and I was not ready for it to be over when Hidan eventually broke it.
His hand firm against my throat continued to build a heat within me.
He locked his gaze with mine once more. I could tell there was something on his mind.
"You feel me, you know it's me." His voice was breathy and whispered.
I was confused for a second but I quickly realized it was a question, not a statement.
He wanted to make sure it was him I was feeling, not anyone else. Not anyone that would hurt me. That's why he kissed me like that. So I would know.
So I couldn't possibly get it confused.
Now he was the one needing assurance. It was overwhelmingly endearing.
My face went soft as I stared back at him, so taken aback by the realization that maybe he cared much more than I thought he could.
"I only feel you. Just you," I assured him in my own breathy whisper. I brought my hands to rest atop his forearm with a squeeze.
His eyes darkened further, those light silvery lashes somehow managing to cast a shadow over them as his lids fell once more. His lips were on me again, it was like he couldn't stop.
Nor was I asking him to.
His mouth's dominance grew as he groaned his approval into me. His teeth biting down on my lip, eliciting a noise that tethered shock and pain into one, before sucking on that spot and I briefly wondered if he'd broken skin.
But I didn't have time to linger on such things for long because his tongue was pressed against mine once more with another deep groan. If that other kiss was for me, then this one was certainly for him. I tried my best to respond in kind.
I liked it. I really did. I more than liked it.
I was just a little thrown by the intensity. It was like he was kissing me with a strength to make up for lost time and it was all I could do to try to keep up, my returned affections peppered with a litany of small, helpless noises that seemed to spur him on more.
He became almost greedy in his kissing, like he wanted to take all he could get because he knew it was all I had to offer at the moment. I was only too keen to let him have it.
His fingers tightened dangerously around my neck for a moment. I broke the kiss with a strained gasp.
My lungs begged for a deep breath but the rest of my body begged for something different.
Izumi, don't you dare rush this.
I didn't necessarily feel like I was the one rushing it. It was just hard not to get swept up in his current.
"Hidan," I whined, my hands pulling at his. He withdrew, bringing his lips to my ear.
"Not gonna hurt you…" he said lowly, obliging by loosening his grip just enough. "...Just like to feel your blood pulsing."
It was an odd thing to say. An even odder thing to hear. But... it didn't bother me.
His teeth found the shell of my ear and scraped down it's length, coming to bite down on the lobe. I could feel him smirk as he drew a surprised gasp from me.
I hadn't noticed before, but without the distraction of his mouth against mine, the hurried sounds of Hidan grabbing and stroking himself took center stage.
I couldn't move my head, my eyes alone shifted to regard his lower half.
He had apparently managed to pull his pants off with one hand during all of that. I was immediately greeted with the sight of Hidan fully nude in all of his glory, pleasuring himself as he stared at me intently.
It made me lose my breath for a moment and I couldn't help but stare with my mouth agape.
His breathing was as labored as mine and when I let out a sighing whimper at the overwhelming sight of him, his jaw clenched and unclenched, a groan pushing through gritted teeth.
"Fuck… you're just here to watch," he reminded himself aloud as he suddenly released the hold on my neck and stepped back to really look at me. He shook his head like he couldn't believe he was actually going to continue backing away from me, but he did.
Continuing back, stepping into the shower, he continued to work himself, slow and methodical.
"I'm gonna stay in here... you're gonna stay out there," he assured, his chest puffing out with heavy breaths in a way that almost made me lose the ability to blink.
"But sweetheart… just so you know, I don't need to touch you to make you fucking come."
I wasn't even entirely sure what to make of that, but the confidence in which he said it sent goosebumps to raise like braille across my skin.
Yes, and if we read it, it says "prove it".
He did not shut the sliding shower door, he just stood there letting the water hit him, sending steaming rivulets across his body, trailing down his pale skin and over the curve of each muscle.
It was mesmerizing, the sight of him.
The way he gazed at me almost dangerously, his hand pumping himself, mouth going from hanging, to teeth biting hard into his lip, back to lips parted as he stared at me in some distant way. Like he was seeing me there of course, but also imagining me doing much more than just sitting atop the counter.
I clenched my thighs together in a squirming motion to push down the uncomfortable blood-rushing pressure that was burgeoning between them as I watched Hidan pleasure himself to the disheveled sight of me.
He was impressive in every sense, a creature of pure, forceful desire driving himself over the edge.
And dare I say… proportionate.
"Are you turned on, sweetheart?" He asked, tipping his chin up and looking at me from behind those intensely lidded eyes.
I was. Very much so.
But I felt so weird vocalizing it. I bit my lip and nodded with a small, whining plea. His lids fluttered and he moaned unapologetically, though he recovered quickly and recaptured me with his gaze.
"It's okay to touch yourself, baby girl," he said, watching me intently.
A tiny, unsure noise escaped me as I was fairly certain I knew what he meant but... what if I didn't? I was so afraid of looking silly when he did nothing but exude confidence.
This was his game to win. I didn't even know how to play.
"It's okay. Spread your legs," he encouraged, his voice becoming feverish and desperate. I was wound so tight, my legs began shaking as I forced them apart.
"Fuck…" He muttered to himself as he looked on, gripping himself tighter.
"Good girl…" he said, his voice smooth and deep. "Now pull your dress up."
'Good girl.'
His encouragement sent a wave of heat through me as I realized I had done something right, something that pleased him.
I wanted to hear it again.
Though a bit nervously, I pulled the fabric of the dress up past my thighs to reveal my undies.
"Fuck… take them off." His brows knitted together as he commanded me and I could hardly take my eyes off his quickening pace.
"Off, sweetheart. You gotta catch up and I can't fucking slow down."
The hesitance in me was quickly stamped out by his urgency and my panties were on the floor only seconds later. I did, however, stall in putting my legs back into their prior position.
"Open… spread them," his commands were becoming more erratic and insatiable and I immediately twitched to obey, not feeling nearly as exposed as I should have upon the sight of Hidan becoming utterly undone.
"Fuck... God…fuck… that's a good girl."
Good girl. There it is again.
"Holy fuck... Jashin… look at that pussy…" He was transfixed. Worshipping. If my face could have flashed any hotter my skin would have melted off.
He was so obscene.
He is… so why is it turning you on?
"Play with yourself, sweetheart," he urged.
I was hesitant to follow this command, despite his insistence. It was embarrassing. I didn't feel I would be very good at it, or do it the way he wanted. I wasn't even sure what way that was and I didn't want to screw up this thing we had going.
I didn't want another Itachi situation where I gave it a cute try…
I tried not to think about that.
"Rub your pussy for me, baby, please." He was more specific.
Perhaps he knew I needed detailed instructions at that stage. I also think that was the first time he'd ever said "please" in his life. Not to mention, at that point it seemed like he was just hurling new pet names at me.
Again, I'll allow it.
God, I felt dumb.
I swallowed. Bringing my shaking hand to hover over my thigh, I hesitated, looking up at him. His face was begging me to move it just a little further to the center.
He bit his lip. I bit my lip.
Just freaking do it. Look at him, my God.
I throbbed beneath the pressure of my fingers even just lightly pressing against my own heat. I let out a gasp at the feeling, I didn't realize I could do this and have it feel so good.
"Ughh… That's it baby girl… holy fuck. I can see how wet you are from here..." he groaned, nearly closing his eyes before forcing them to stay open as if to take in every last drop with them.
So that's two for two. Guess it really is a good thing.
"That's perfect... just like that. Now, I need you to do something for me, sweetheart." He sounded very serious through his lustful breathing.
I nodded. I would do it, whatever it was.
"I need you to imagine something…" he said with a lingering stare.
"I need you to look at me, look at my cock."
So brazen.
I was looking. He was back to pumping himself in long, slow, rhythmic strokes.
"Good girl… now imagine it squeezing into that tight little pussy of yours…"
Hidan was vocal... to say the least.
"I want you to think about sitting down on it nice and fucking slow… this thick fucking cock pushing through your lips... pushing into you, stretching you out, filling up that cute little hole… fuck baby girl…God..."
I wouldn't call his vocal tendencies bad… just jarring. I had never heard anyone speak like that in my life and my body shuddered upon hearing some of it as he left me no choice but to imagine in vivid detail the things he was describing.
Part of me cringed at his unapologetic lewdness but another part of me basked in it.
It was very obvious he was imagining these things as well as he seemed to unravel towards the end.
He could have been doing those things to me right then, he wanted to be, but this was enough for him at that moment.
Him in the shower, me on the counter, both imagining us doing much more terrible things to each other yet still not daring to do more than just look at one another and only touch ourselves.
"You thinking about it, sweetheart?" he pressed.
His stare was poignant and heated on me, flickering between my hand rubbing against myself in quick succession and my face contorting into some brow-knitted, mouth-gaping expression that had him looking like he would fall apart at any moment.
I nodded with a hitching breath, my voice breaking as I pushed out a small "yes".
"God, I've wanted to see your face do that for the longest fucking time…"
Oh?
"Are you thinking about my hands holding your fucking thighs apart so you couldn't close them even if you wanted? You taking this cock, all of it, until my balls slap against your ass? Bottoming out in your soaking wet pussy…"
His lids fluttered from just the thought but so did mine.
"Fuck, I would drive this dick into you over and over until I had you screaming… then I'd keep fucking going," His voice was deep and low and full of all things wanting and needing.
I had lost any semblance of humility as a drawn out, simpering moan tittered off my lips.
"Oh sweetheart, I'm not sure if you could even handle it that deep..." he questioned aloud, his eyes rolling back as he clearly imagined trying it regardless.
I wasn't sure either, and the further we pushed into this depraved territory, the more I wanted to find out.
"Faster, baby girl." His commands were for me but he was following them himself.
I was lost in the sight of him. What we were doing felt oddly animalistic. Like we were devolving into a feverishness dealt upon ourselves but designed for the other person, and there was no force too powerful or speed too quick to satiate the indecent thirst we dared the quench.
"Hidan…?" I whispered with a trill of surprise as a quickly escalating feeling pulsed through me very suddenly.
I winced my eyes shut as I hit a spot that spiked in intensity. Then again. And again. I rubbed against it eagerly as I chased the feeling down, my breath becoming more and more strained with each little circle I pressed into myself.
"Open your eyes, sweetheart. Open them," Hidan breathed and grunted his words, his hand squeezing hard around his girth and his hips bucking into it erratically.
"You look at me when you come."
The pressing insistence of his strained voice, the absolute need coating it, had my eyes snapping open to comply, though my lids could hardly handle it. They hung heavy over my darkened irises and my eyebrows knitted desperately with effort to keep my gaze on him.
"Holy fuck, that fucking face" Hidan whispered to himself as he too lost the ability to blink. "Look at me. Come for me, sweetheart. Come on."
Between his desperate, begging encouragement and the absolutely unravelled look on his jaw-clenched face, I lost it. I did just as he told me.
I came. I came apart until I was nothing more than a twitching, shivering mess, my hand clenched tightly between my thighs which clamped shut as soon as the swell overwhelmed me.
Despite my hand in a vice grip of my own design, I left it pressed against myself as I let out an extended, stuttering cry at the feeling exploding from beneath my soaked fingertips. I couldn't help but squeeze my eyes shut at the feeling.
"Look at me, baby girl." His command was somehow sweet but booming at the same time and I wrenched my eyes open as much as I could to oblige. My eyes met his and I knew right away, whatever heady, lusting expression my face held was the thing he'd been chasing.
From under my desperately arching brows and heavy lids begging to close from the pleasure, I got to watch him fall to pieces.
Hidan groaned out a string of unintelligible noises and expletives. His free hand shot out against the shower door to hold himself up as he hunched over and angled himself into the stream of the showerhead.
His hand pumping in a mad, sporadic pace. Eyes unwavering from my small, heaving form shaking atop his counter.
A strained grunt marked the beginning of the end. His stomach flexed and twitched as ribbons of hot, white liquid streamed from him with his final erratic strokes.
He didn't dare take his eyes off me, nor I him. I was fixed at his expression, teeth bared for a moment as if the intensity in which he burst was too much to handle, yet he seemed to manage just fine in the end.
He stood beneath the warm jets of the showerhead, breathing heavily for a moment, finally allowing himself to close his eyes with a flitter.
He stepped out of the shower, turning it off after only a moment.
I needed more than that, still finding it difficult to breathe or even form a word. I slackly lifted my head to look at him as he walked toward me with eyes that threatened to devour me whole.
"Izumi… sweetheart…" he took my head in his hands, dripping wet fingers cutting through my hair in messy chunks. He tilted my head up towards him at a pinched angle and in a show of dominance, brought his lips against mine for a deep, groaning kiss. I hadn't had a chance to catch my breath yet so I found myself gasping into it.
"That…" he said, breaking away with a pull of my lip between his teeth, "...was fucking sexy."
"Yeah?" My breathy voice was small and nervous.
"Fucking yeah. Also… I told you I'd make you come without touching you," he said with the slyest of expressions.
I instantly covered my face with my hands, mortified by his bluntness.
"Hey, you think you can hide from me? Give me this," he grabbed my right hand and brought it to his face. I stared at him gaping as he took my fingers into his mouth, one by one.
"Mmm…" He was enjoying himself a little too much.
"What are you doing?" I hissed, unable to pull back.
He seemed to be savoring it but eventually popped the last finger from his lips.
"I'm helping you clean up, geez."
"Hidan," I breathed out, exasperated.
"Alright, alright, come here," he said through a laugh, pulling me against him and planting a kiss on top of my head.
I sighed, contented, closing my eyes and letting myself catch my breath against him.
I had to admit, I really liked my new dress.
A/N:
(I was gonna post Sunday but I'll be away this weekend so I wanted to get it out now!)
Alright guys, I think it's safe to say... Hidan likes Izumi :3 and I would also venture to say the same is true vice versa.
DRAMMMAAAAA
You guys aren't nearly as thirsty as my AO3 readers so I hope you tolerated it well enough lmaooo
Just an innocent little mutual masturbation scene . .
I thought it would be fun, since Hidan is sooo super physical, to make it so they couldn't touch at all. And you know... he's got that dirty mouth, may as well put it to use :)
And I love derpy little Izumi learning her sexual preferences. OF COURSE she has a praise kink jfc XD (NOT THAT THERE IS ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT) She's just such a cinnamon roll :3
Full Disclosure, I will be taking a small break from posting. I hope to keep it no longer than a month-long hiatus. It is NOT a break from WRITING. Do NOT worry. I know these are like... the famous last words for so many fics.
I assure you, I have not lost passion or direction. I just tend to write ahead a ways and then go back and fill in the gaps, so right now I need time to fill in the gaps and I don't want to feel rushed because then my brain will actually break.
THANKS FOR READING BBS
