It is I, coming at you with another one-shot! This one ended up being the longest one I've written to date, I just kept writing and it just kept not being done lol. Either way, this one focuses on one of the more criminally underrated ships on here, so I thought I'd give it my best shot at writing an adorable IffyCompa. I also finally got to utilize the best girl, B-sha. I hope you enjoy it, and if you have anything you'd like to add feel free!
-marketvalueneps
There were many rumors, theories, and just the usual gossip exchanged around the streets of Planeptune. Even more so than the other nations. With a ruler like Neptune, it just came with the territory. Some leaks had proven to be true on many occasions, like Neptune's love for sweets, a fact which boosted that sector by over 75% mind you. While others seemed odd even for Planeptunian standards, like the one that Neptune had secretly been funneling shares from the depths of hell. Although in fairness there was some validity to that, however, the people who spread it had no clue.
Recently however a rumor had been spreading that left many poor young men with a broken heart. Planeptune's own lovely ditzy nurse, Compa, the envy of all women and the gaze of all young men. That very same Compa had had her heart won by the equally famous guild agent IF. In fairness, none could think of someone more worthy of the trophy than the human who stood so tall she reached the level of even the goddesses. But even still the idea of that was enough to put some into a depression.
In actuality, no such thing had been done. For you see the aforementioned veteran guild agent was what her purple hair goddess friend called 'in the Nile'. Aka, she didn't want to admit to herself how much Compa actually meant to her, and the nurse in question was far too ditzy to notice anything or do anything about it. So, the stalemate had been reached, and there it stayed for years. Although practically everyone in their friend group knew exactly what was going on.
Neptune considered herself wise. And while most, if not all, would scoff at her for saying such a thing, she still insisted it, nonetheless. You see it's not like she was incapable of many of the things asked of her. She was fully capable and when push came to shove, she believed she had proven herself every time. It's just she didn't want to. She was lazy, not incompetent. Which was an important distinction if you asked her. People acted as though she was woeful, which angered her in a way. But the energy required to prove them wrong was just not worth it. At that moment she could almost feel Histy yelling at her.
In this vein, she also considered herself observant. She could notice things, especially about her friends. As she always would say 'my eye of nep misses nothing!'. Like she totally knew about Noire's cosplaying before anyone else. She also uncovered Blanc's pseudonym she used when she shadow published her novels, which she was more than happy to trade away to Vert for a king's ransom. What Vert did with them was of no concern of Neptune, although she was sure they would be utilized to the fullest by the busty goddess.
So, Neptune had had the down low on her old friend's dilemma since almost the beginning. And as much as she wanted to 'help', or at least her version of it, she remembered distinctly when she brought the topic up to her darling sister the answer was a resounding 'no'. Nepgear had even threatened to take away her pudding reservoir! A betrayal of this magnitude usually was received by an et tu! Worse yet Neptune knew she was serious, and Nepgear knew the location of Neptune's secret pudding supply she hid from Histoire. She could only shiver at the memory. It was rare for Nepgear to stand up to her sister in such a way, and Neptune knew that poking the bear was a good way to be out of pudding in a hurry.
Presently Neptune found herself pouting at the thought as she mashed through yet another pointless dungeon in the basic RPG she was playing. It was beyond droll at this point and she wasn't even really paying attention to her inputs at this point. She could beat a game like this in her sleep if she wanted. In fact, she had indeed beaten a game in her sleep, she even made Noire watch her do it!
"Man, only old grannies and toddlers could enjoy this game!" Neptune bemoaned her current situation. Today was especially boring for Neptune. Today was a scheduled off day from Histoire herself, an agreement had long since been reached that there was no way that Neptune could work every day so in order to entice her, more Histoire yielded her a few every so often. With that being the case Nepgear had called up the candidates and had gone off somewhere with them all. Neptune couldn't help but chuckle when she overheard her phone call with Uni thinking about how familiar the sight was.
Nevertheless, without Nepgear Neptune had no one to badger. And she could forget about trying any of her fellow CPUs, she knew how they always were. Noire and Blanc were likely to be actually working themselves, and Vert, well Neptune was not feeling a 50 hours MMO grind at the moment. That left her human companions, and well IF and Compa both had jobs, and tracking down any of the makers proved a difficult task especially considering even the developers forgot about their existence….
"Guess I could go try Plutie and P-ko… But that sounds so lame, plussss this author has already done that'' Neptune groaned even further. At that very moment she could feel a presence in the shadows, looking around she noticed too late that the person was quickly approaching, and before she could react Neptune caught a full force foot to the face.
'R*der kick!" Yelled out the energetic young lady, who, for some strange reason, she happened to be wearing a stylized black mask that did absolutely nothing to hide her identity. Everyone in their right mind knew this blonde in the yellow and red dress was B-sha of the gold third. Of all the gold third she was easily the most beloved by the populace of her former country. "Bad Nep-Nep how many times do we have to explain to you that it's not even funny to break the fourth wall like that!" B-sha yelled out with her foot on top of the 'slain' villain. Striking her famous presto mask pose she declared victory.
"Gosh darn it B-sha!" the previously defeated Neptune yelled as she took the opportunity to push out the leg of the hero on top of her, causing her to lose her balance and fall onto the ground beside them. "What kind of hero kicks the adorable face of the protagonist of the franchise! Not to mention my clever breaking of the fourth wall is one of the iconic bits of this franchise!' Neptune pointed an accusatory finger towards her attacker.
"Ouch… I know I know Nep-Nep… Did you have to push me so hard?" B-sha groaned from the floor. "I just wanted to make a flashy entrance." The blonde explained, she visited the basilicom quite often, and while on very rare occasions with persuasion from Histoire she would actually help Planeptune with its workload (paid of course), on most days she was there strictly to visit her friends. She liked to make a flashy entrance every time.
"And how many times do I have to tell you to just use the door like a normal person…" Neptune deadpanned with her trademarked Umio face. Her friend had a habit of being a little over the top even for Neptune's standards, so it was odd, but she had to play the straight man with her sometimes. But she genuinely loved the company of the former usurper of her nation. Which was an odd way to phrase it, despite being true.
"What kind of hero just waltzes in through the front door?" The aspiring hero just laughed at the implication. Heroes had energy! They were brave, they rescued children! Surely, they would find a more exciting way to enter the room. "Anyway Nep-Nep, look what I found!" Changing the subject, she enthusiastically pulled out a full-scale Nepgeardam model set from somewhere (?). "It's the biggest one they've ever made. So, I brought it over so we can put it together! I won't even charge you, so let's get started!" She finished with a broad smile that was easily read by the remaining party in the room. If she was offering something for free, she must be awfully excited.
"Aww sweet! Ya thinks we can keep it here?" Neptune asked. She had a few lying around, but usually, B-sha would take them back to her place, which was fine with Neptune, she did pay for them after all. But Neptune wanted to keep this one, she had a perfect place for it, and she had a feeling Nepgear would appreciate the robot in her likeness as well.
"Hmmmm… Sure why not! I mean I'm running out of room in my apartment so if you want it just to make sure you take care of it ok Nep-Nep?" B-sha's eyes stared through Neptune's soul at that moment, judging her every sin, and worthiness of holding this precious artifact.
"Aye aye, my gilded friend." Neptune offered a faux salute, and after a moment B-sha judged her friend worthy, and the two got to work.
As the pair worked on the corrupted amalgamation of the CPU candidate in the robotic form, they struck up conversations on varying topics, from B-shas work with Chuko. From the lips of the blonde, they were 'scamming the daylights out of poor unsuspecting losers' which received a blank stare from her compatriot. To Neptune bemoaning how Histoire 'worked her like an underpaid minor', receiving a sympathetic nod from B-sha, who very well knew the full extent of 'Pissty'.
Eventually, B-sha was reminded of something she heard the other day, while she put the finishing touches on the signature funny face™ she looked over to Neptune as she began,
"Hey, Nep-Nep I heard something interesting the other day." She spoke as she concentrated on her handiwork. She wanted to make sure every detail on this model came out perfect, after all she dropped a lot of good hard-earned money on this!
"You never can trust too much that you hear on the streets, remember the time they tried to say I was the one responsible for the distribution of those weird stories written about me a Nowa that Blanc wrote! It was that Fanclub I tell ya! Blanc didn't talk to me for 2 months…" Neptune whined about the oddly specific example, leaving B-sha speechless.
"Wh- What? No, I don't remember that?" B-sha was confused at this, but nevertheless, she continued, "So anyway, when I was walking home the other day, I heard the two guys talking about how they lost the love of their lives…"
"I can't believe it, how could she not choose me?" The first of the painfully unoriginal men bemused, his companion was unamused as he retorted.
"That's because you're ugly, she should have chosen a stud like me" The second average Joe chuckled as he hit a flex.
"As if either of us can compare to that" The first guy laughed heartily
B-sha couldn't help but overhear the conversation, thinking on her feet she thought she could offer one of her patented therapy sessions for boring dudes who got their hearts broken. She charged a fortune and all she had to do was listen to some boring dudes whine for half an hour, it was genius!
"Hello gentleman, I couldn't help but overhear your conversation, what could you be talking about?" B-sha used every bit of her saleswoman charisma with that lead.
"Huh?" They spoke in synchrony. Leaving B-sha to stare at them blankly.
"Well I mean I just thought you could use someone to listen to you" B-sha re-upped her sales pitch.
"Nah this dumbass never stood a chance with Compa" The second man laughed as he pointed at his friend, who was less than pleased.
"Oh yeah? And you think you can stand up to THE wind walker of Gamindustri?, IF?"
B-shas ears perked up at that, these two were talking about IF and Compa? Now she really didn't regret scamming these schmucks.
"What's that about IF and Compa?" B-sha asked immediately, she wanted to know what these two were talking about two of her friends.
"Oh? You didn't hear, apparently IF has won over Compa, every sane guy in the country is weeping…"
"And then I charged them 5,000 credits" B-sha finished her story while sticking her tongue out, receiving a facepalm.
"Those poor bastards never stood a chance…" Neptune poured one out for them. Truly no regular person could resist B-sha's greed.
"Hey, survival of the fittest" B-sha cheekily added.
"But that's not as important, I can tell ya I know those rumors ain't true! No way Miss Iffy would ever get over her raw chunni tsun to go get her girl!" Neptune laughed at the expense of her friend, simultaneously somewhere far away IF swore she could sense it as she felt her nose prickle and she let out a sneeze.
"That's mean Nep-Nep!" B-sha chastised the purplette.
"Hey I mean I'm not wrong, I'm sure even you noticed how obvious it is our resident Chunni is heads over heels for our favorite ditz!" Neptune defended herself while pointing out the obvious.
"Well duh! Everyone knows, but I guess we're all just waiting for it to happen" B-sha explained it as best she could, it was like an unspoken code to not bring it up.
"You know you're not really one who should be talking about everyone just choosing to ignore an obvious fact…" Neptune deadpanned while giving her buddy a look.
"Hmm, what do you mean by that Nep-Nep?" B-sha asked in genuine confusion.
"Uhh well, nothing" Neptune casually whistled.
"I was kinda thinking though, Nep-Nep, shouldn't we, you know, help Iffy out? I mean it could be that she's just afraid, I know that being afraid of something can feel like a mountain." B-sha explained her perspective on it. It came from the heart for her, and Neptune knew that. It wasn't that long ago that B-sha's crippling fear of monsters got in the way of protecting her country and the children. And IF was one of the people along with Neptune herself that helped break her out of her shell. So if there was something she could do to repay the debt she would stop at nothing to help.
"See I said that!" Neptune jumped up whilst pointing at B-sha, "But Nep Jr was all like 'Neptune leave IF alone she doesn't need your help'" Neptune explained with an absolutely dreadful impression of her sister, which received a chuckle from the blonde.
"But I mean I don't see her around," B-sha pointed out.
"But if she hears I was involved, you don't understand B-sha she threatened my pudding collection" Neptune explained on the verge of tears.
"Well… What if it wasn't Neptune, what if it was the dastardly villain Neptugia! Who has kidnapped the lovely Compa? Powerful enough to overcome the beautiful and brave Presto Mask, but just then the light in the darkness, IF! " B-sha unveiled the extent of her master plan. Enthusiastically showcasing the emotion of the moments.
"B-sha my friend has anyone ever told you you might be a genius?" Neptune stared in awe at her friend. Never before had she heard such a foolproof plan.
Over the next hour or so the two masterminds worked out the kinks in their grand design. Truly never before in gamindustri history had such brain cells been put together in this manner, and honestly, the two doubted it ever would. Soon the time approached for them to put this grand design into practice…
Across the capital city in one of the larger hospitals in the city strode out the strawberry-haired nurse. She sighed deeply as she walked out into the bright sunlight. Today had been more of the same for her, busy as a bee with patients flying in and out of her rooms. Injuries were just a common occurrence across the dangerous land that was gamindustri and if she could do anything to help those who needed it she would do it in a heartbeat, that's how her grandpa taught her after all!
Although she had to admit she got a bizarre amount of patients that were male in their early to late twenties that seemed far more eager than they should have been to get examined by the nurse. She pondered the thought as she strolled out towards the employee parking where she had left her car for the day, not noticing the sneaking presence approaching her location.
She could not even let out a scream as she felt herself get grabbed by the mysterious presence, Quickly the person picked her up with ease and strolled off to do whatever dastardly actions they had intended for her. Even as Compa struggled against the attacker she found her strength paled in comparison to theirs, she wasn't budding an inch.
Compa had lived in Planeptune her whole life and had a good idea of the geography of the capital city, which is why she found it odd when she could tell that her attacker had been bringing her to the middle of the city, she tried her best to keep as calm as she could, she could remember the 'training' that her best friend and veteran guild agent IF had given her. IF thought it necessary because as good friends of the residing CPU that made them prime targets for attackers trying to get to Neptune through them. And while IF was more than confident in her own ability to ward off said attackers (although she did hear a story involving the other version of her, which also strangely involved eggplant apparently) she was worried about her friend.
Compa was startled when she saw her field of view change once more as she found herself upright once more, looking around she appeared to be in one of the central plazas of the city, oddly close to the guild, which she thought was odd, this kidnapper must have some serious chops to try and pull something like this off. Speaking of which Compa tried her best to eye said attacker, shocked by what she saw.
"Nep-Nep?" She asked in a soft tone, there in front of her was the spitting image of her friend and Planeptune CPU, purple hair d-clips and odd sweater hoodie thing and all. The only difference was she sported an obviously fake mustache. Which just left Compa even more confused than before. She soon found herself unable to move as she was tied up by the mustachioed 'evil' version of her friend.
"No!" Totally Neptune yelled out as she angrily turned around, or at least her best impression of anger. Bringing out a mega-phone from who knows where she drew a crowd as she yelled "I have grown tired of this world propping up that so-called goddess while forgetting me! I am Neptugia and I am here to enact my revenge, starting first with the bubbly friend of your so-called goddess!"
As murmurs erupted from the crowd, Neptune knew she had them right where she wanted them.
"Neptugia?"
"Is she related to Nepugia?"
"How dare you talk about Lady Purple Heart like that!"
She chuckled as she spoke once more, "Foolish masses, propping up that false idol you worship like a deity, I will show you the foolishness of your own dependency on that witch!" She declared even louder than usual, in truth that was the cue she had worked on, and if all went according to plan…
"Not if I have to say anything about it!" The boisterous voice could be heard in the distance and soon flying in on her magical golden G*ndam was none other than Presto Mask! Soon cheers erupted from the gathered crowd.
"Mommy! Mommy! Look, it's Presto Mask!"
"Give her what for Presto Mask!"
"Show her the power of Planeptune!"
She could feel the power of the crowd envelop her. She felt bad in a way that she had to lose this, but this was for the greater good, and besides every superhero needs development!
"So you think you can take me on, the great Netugia!?" Neptune yelled out in a comically over-the-top tone, pulling out a katana as she spoke. Now obviously she didn't not plan on actually hurting her friend but she had to make it look as believable as possible. With B-sha taking a fighting stance in response, obviously using her usual patent-pending rocket launcher was out of the question in a crowded city such as this, but she could still pull some moves off with her bare hands!
As the two 'fought' word quickly reached the nearby guild agency, where the star of this masquerade found herself resting after another long day of grinding pointless quests. Seriously, who needed 15 dogoo jellies!? And what could they possibly be using it for? Sighing deeply as she delved further into the comfortable spot she had found on the couch in the employee lounge.
"Miss IF! Miss IF!" She soon would be ripped out of the comfort she had found by the panicked voice of one of the receptionists.
"What!?" Slightly annoyed, IF demanded an answer, technically she was off the clock so this better is pretty bloody important!
Taking a moment to catch her breath, the receptionist looked at the woman before her and stated, "It's terrible, some villain by the name of Neptugia has taken a hostage in one of the plazas, I heard Presto Mask is already there, but there are so many people she can't seem to make any progress, we need you to head over there in order to help rescue the hostage!" The woman explained in one breath as she tried to lay out the situation as quickly as possible.
"Neptugia? Now, what the hell is that about?" IF was confused by this, if she was strong enough to hold off B-sha then surely she should have heard of her before.
"She claims she is sick of being forgotten in favor of Lady Purple Heart, and she wishes to drag down her" The receptionist explained what she had heard about the motivations of this villain.
"Speaking of, where is Nep anyway?" IF asked as she prepared herself for combat.
"We have been unable to reach Lady Purple Heart at this time, and Lady Purple Sister is too far away at this time to be able to help, it may be up to you miss IF" She gave a courteous bow as the Burnette left the room, and made her way out of the building towards where she could see all the commotion taking place.
Breaking through the crowd, and getting a good look she could see a clearly winded B-sha on the defensive against who she could clearly tell was just Neptune in a fake mustache, looking past her she could see the hostage tied behind them, and getting a good look she could identify that person as,
"Compa!" IF made her presence known as she shouted out the name of her childhood friend. "B-sha switch!" She ordered the former gold third.
"I know not this B-sha person bu-"
"Yea yea whatever, switch!" She cut off the blonde who grumbled to herself hopping back.
Now that she had a good look at this Neptugia person she couldn't believe everyone had fallen for this, just what on earth was she planning with this?
"Nep what the hell are you doing, have you lost your mind! Let Compa go now!" IF angrily yelled at her friend, in response she was startled when the swing of a katana missed her by a few inches.
"I am sick of being compared to that harlot! I am Neptugia, now prepare to take this seriously or you will be seriously sorry!" She yelled out as she pointed her sword forward. IF steeled her features as she drew her qatars and prepared herself. Whether this was Nep or not wasn't important anymore. Not only did she swing with killing intent at her, but she had also committed as heinous a crime as one could, she dared lay her hands on Compa! She was going to regret this, and IF was personally going to send her to hell herself!
Thinking that was a perfect punishment for her IF focused as she summoned the flames of hell themselves, activating her skill with a yell.
"Demonic Inferno! Enjoy your stay in hell!"
Neptune looked around and gulped. She knew she was going to have to take at least one attack in order to make it look believable, and she just happened to predict that IF would likely use that skill and had equipped her fire-resistant equipment. But it went against every fiber of her being to just stand there and face tank a skill attack. As the fire quickly enveloped her she yelled out as she slumped over, signaling her defeat. (In actuality the attack barely did 10% of her health, which still stung like the dickens, but nothing a Nep Bull couldn't fix)
IF could only stare blankly at the defeated figure of the woman in front of her. This was the person that B-sha had had so much trouble dealing with? As she stood there she watched as B-sha jumped out from the crowd, picking up Neptugia, with a yell she ran off carrying the villain.
"Excellent work citizen, you have a real future in the crime-fighting business. Now I will make sure this 'Neptugia' goes where she belongs, everyone three cheers for IF!"
"Hip hip!"
"Hurray!"
IF was completely dumbfounded as she heard the cheers erupt and watched as B-sha made a mad dash in the direction of the basilicom. Which is decidedly in the completely opposite direction of the prison. Although the basilicom did have a few holding cells, however those were usually reserved for truly dangerous characters who needed strict guarding.
But at the present moment IF had more pressing matters to handle than her dumbass friends. Turning her head to the bound figure of her childhood friend she stepped forward and quickly cut the ropes confining her.
Immediately IF felt a pair of arms wrap themselves firmly around her waist, looking down she could see the already teary face of her friend.
"Iffffffy that was sooo scarry!" Compa cried out as she buried her teary face into the stomach of her smaller companion.
"Shh ok, ok. I get it, you did well staying calm." IF calmly spoke as she petted the strawberry hair of the larger woman.
"I just- I remembered- what you told me," Compa said between hiccups.
"I know, and I'm proud of you. Now come on, let's go home, what do you say?" IF offered the nurse a warm smile as she offered her hand. Taking the opportunity, while still being shaken, Compa quickly attached herself to the side of the petite woman. Walking off the crowd could only look on.
"See I fucking told ya!" A yell could be heard as one of the young men chastised his friend, slugging his arm he continued, "You said 'aww man there's noooo way Compa is into chicks'' After this left his mouth pandemonium soon ensued. Surely there would be much to talk about in the coming days.
As IF and Compa made their way down the busy streets of Planeptune in the direction of Compa's apartment, the silence between them was comforting. Knowing each other as long as the pair did, words were often unnecessary to share what was going on. Well of course except that. IF internally sighed as she looked over to her friend, still attached to her arm.
How long had it been since IF finally admitted to herself what exactly Compa meant to her? IF couldn't remember a time without Compa by her side, and the very idea of such a world was one IF cursed the thought of. IF could feel it eating her alive whenever they were out together, which was often. And now? Now IF could feel her heart aching as she walked along with her first and only love.
All the other people seemed meaningless, and IF could barely see them as they skillfully walked around them. It was right as the workday was winding down, and the streets were packed full of busy adults getting back from their soul-crushing 9-5's. But in IFs mind at the moment they might as well have been ants walking along the sidewalk.
How many times did the thought enter her mind? You need to tell her. Coward. Do you really think you can keep going on like this? It tore her up inside, but every time she wanted to, she couldn't help but feel powerless when she went to do it. Compa was the most wonderful, sweet, gorgeous, and perfect woman she had ever met in her entire life, and IF was personal friends with literal goddesses. But none of them came close to rivaling the goddess she was walking with at the moment. She could have anyone on the planet if she wanted, so why in Neptunes' name would she settle for her? The fears that plagued her heart were like a chain, and IF couldn't seem to break through it seemed.
Eventually, the pair found themselves at their destination, the modest apartment complex that housed Compa's residence. On many, a night Compa, and even IF herself would make their way to the basilciom and make the building that housed the goddess of the nation into their home away from home. Which was a feat more impressive than the two humans ever seemed to give it credit for. Regardless the pair made their way up the stairs and reached the door Compa finally separated from IF as she reached into her pocket and retrieved the key to the front door.
Unlocking it and making their way inside, they soon found themselves sitting around the kitchen table making idle chat. Compa's apartment wasn't anything special. It had a kitchen attached to the dining area, a small area for watching TV and gaming (even if Compa herself wasn't much of a gamer, she still owned Planeptunes newest consoles), and finally, there was one bedroom off the living area. As the pair talked about all manners of topics, eventually IF could feel her own stomach growl, signaling the desire for food.
"Man, you think I should order us something?" IF chuckled out.
"No, my hero deserves to eat a home-cooked meal" Compa puffed her cheeks as she got up. "Now just sit right there I'll cook us something good!" She insisted as she made her way to the modest kitchen, leaving IF behind, a fierce blush overtaking her features.
As IF sat in her seat, awaiting eagerly the meal that would be provided for her. Not only was Compa well known as the best cook in any group she was a member of. But it was cooked for her by Compa, the thought alone made IF want to smile from ear to ear. As IF idly checked her many phones, she couldn't help but notice one specific message waiting for her.
From: Nep- I gave you all the setup you need, now take home the prize ;) ps that Demonic Inferno stung like the dickens, if you mess this up, I'll Nep your butt!
Neptune was a walking dead woman. IF was going to kill her.
But before IF could get any further into her decide mindset, her attention was brought back to the kitchen,
"It's ready~" Compa cutely called out as she brought forth her creation. It was a simple pasta dish with chicken. Unfortunately for IF, it was two plates of pasta, so no convenient shenanigans would be helping her on her eternal quest.
Smiling Compa put the plates down at their respective spots. Digging in immediately, IF was quickly in heaven as the taste enveloped her taste buds. Sure it was a simple dish, but to IF it might as well have been the tastiest thing she had ever put into her mouth.
"Soo good~" She cooed out. Receiving a giggle from the woman sitting across from her.
"I love it when Iffy loves my food" She genuinely felt that way. For as long as she could remember the greatest joys in her life were lifting up the people around her. Whether it be a certain purple-haired pudding-loving goddess, or her adorably nerdy but still somewhat shy little sister. Or most importantly the always reliable and super duper cool best friend she had been with for as long as her memory served.
As they finished their food, and IF stood to offer to clean the dishes, but to her surprise, this was met with a stubborn pout from the usually ditzy woman.
"No Iffy saved me the least I can do is clean up" She huffed out, IF knowing how oddly stubborn she could be when she wanted to, conceded to her and left her to clean up. She couldn't help but be reminded of the times that Nep would talk about them as 'an old married couple' and IF couldn't help but sigh thinking about how nice that actually would be.
The more she thought it over the more she realized she longed for that type of relationship. Both of them coming back from long days, calming down over a lovely meal, talking the night away, sleeping togeth-
"AHhhh!" She slapped the redness away as she was overwhelmed by the thought.
"Iffy! Are you ok?" Of course, being within earshot Compa couldn't help but be concerned by the sudden yell of her friend. "Are you running a fever? You'd be surprised how quickly those can creep up on people" her voice was laced with worry as she brought her forehead to the woman in question, of course having no idea the effect this would have on her.
"Ahhh close close close" IF stuttered out backing up. Causing even more concern from the nurse.
"Iffy it's no good to do that, you have to let medical professionals examine you" She puffed out as she once more got close to the adventuress.
"I'm fine I swear Compa!" IF frantically waved her hands in front of her trying to emphasize her point. Eventually, Compa huffed as she sat down.
"How come only Iffy gets to save me, and never me saving Iffy" Her tone was almost, jealous? In a way. Even Compa had a hard time explaining it to herself, but every time she was in a pickle IF was there for her, but it never seemed like she was there for her. And it was starting to break her heart, she couldn't help but let out a few tears as she mulled it over.
"Iffy is so important to me, but she never lets me help her, and that makes me so sad" Her tears never hit the ground, and she for the second time that day found herself enveloped by a warming hug, she quickly wrapped her arms around IF returning the gesture.
"Compa! Look at me" Once she saw that she was indeed meeting her gaze she gulped as deep as she could before she began, "Listen Compa, you are probably the single most important person to me. If I ever need anything I know that you are the most reliable person, you are more kind than any person I have ever met. Compa- I- I-" IF swallowed hard. She had fought dragons, bitter ancient CPUs (on two occasions!), and a world-ending representation of sin itself! But never in her whole life was she as nervous as she was at this moment, looking once more at the beautiful face of the woman in front of her she summoned all the courage she had in her body, "Comap I love you, and nothing that can ever happen would ever change that" She felt her face explode into redness as she tried to look at anything else.
Soon moments passed and so did minutes as Compa stared shocked by the words that left the mouth of the woman she was clinging to.
"Haha I guess I should have figured you out of my league, please just forget that…" IF tried to laugh away whatever the feeling that was creeping up on her, as she tried to get up, she felt something tug on her, looking over she quickly found that Compa had closed the distance between them and had placed her lips on IF's own. Melting immediately IF felt the world come together at long last as they stayed connected for just that fleeting moment.
"Iffy you big dummy I love you too! How could you think that lil old me is out of your league. You're the bravest and cutest girl I've ever met!"
"Heh no way you're way cuter Compa"
"Iffy is the cutest!"
"No way!"
As the new couple continued at this for way longer than should be physically possible, eventually they ran out of energy. In truth neither could remember who got the last word in, and as they lie there, they eventually felt the need for sleep come nipping at them, Deciding to take their leave Compa got up as she practically dragged IF to her bedroom, IF, who had wanted to simply sleep at her own place was incapable of resisting Compa as it would appear, and eventually the pair found themselves letting sleep overtake them.
As the first morning rays peaked into the room, now shared by IF and Compa, IF felt herself opening her eyes first. Taking a glance over to the figure that still lied beside her, she felt a wave of happiness overtake her. She had actually done it, and it felt sweeter than she could have ever hoped for. Now there was just one loose end to tie up.
Getting out of bed, she could see the stirring figure of Compa as she made her way out of the room, leaving her with a parting line
"You can go back to bed, I just have one thing I have to handle, then I'll come right back." She smiled as she finished, conveniently both IF and Compa had off days in their schedule so they could spend the day together.
"Ok Iffy, bye-bye I love you," Compa groggily said as she let sleep overtake her once more.
No matter how many times she would hear it in the rest of her life, IF would never grow tired of hearing Compa say that. Never.
Riding the high, IF made her way outside and towards the eyesore in the center of the nation. Oh, yea she had business to handle. As she made her way inside the large tower, greeted by only a nod from the standing guard, she made her way up the building to the residential wing. Luckily, she knew exactly where she was heading.
Making her way to the room she knew was shared by the residents, she sneakily opened the door and made her way inside. It appeared that only one of the residents was present at that moment, and it was the one she was looking for, perfect.
Looking over the sleeping form of the CPU she cracked her knuckles as she picked up the light woman, and quickly hopped off and hit her into a suplex.
"AAAAAAA! IFFY WHAT THE HELL!" Neptune yelled out in pain. As she had unexpectedly been dragged out of her comfortable sleep and thrown onto the ground. And despite this not being the first time she had been suplexed by the woman, it's not as though she relished the opportunity to be dirtied again.
"That's what you get for yesterday, you colossal dumbass!" IF yelled in retaliation, but before Neptune could make it into an argument she added one last line, "But thanks Nep, Ill be sure to let Compa know to thank you and B-sha as well" IF smiled warmly as she gave her a quick hug, and Neptune couldn't help but smile as she looked at the happy form of her cherished friend leave.
"Mission success"
END
I hope you all enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed writing this. Keep your eyes peeled in the future for more nonsense published by this account.
