Act 1

J.D. and Varie are making their way over to the Loud House.

J.D. spoke to the viewers, "Hello there, everyone. Today is October 31st, also known as Halloween. It's one of my favorite times of year. Lucy has a special corn maze set up, and I have a feeling this year's Halloween will be fantastic. I have a truly terrifying surprise in store for it."

Varie also told the viewers, "Me too. We're going to have a great time."

The Loud House is decked out for Halloween, and the entrance to a corn maze is right next door. A refrigerator door opens in the kitchen, and a scream is heard as bats fly out of the house, darkening the sky. Back in the kitchen, Lynn Sr. screams in terror after discovering a fake severed head with fake blood in the fridge. "I hate Halloween!" he yelled.

He walks out of the kitchen, and Lucy enters a moment later, walking towards the fridge and picking up the head.

"I love Halloween," Lucy says with a smile.

"Bleh," the head said.

She walks out of the kitchen.

In the Dining Room, Luan is making a "HAUNTED CORN MAZE" sign out of red-stained corn cobs, Leni is hanging black curtains, Luna, Lincoln, Lana, Lola, and Lynn Jr. are carving pumpkins, Lisa is making fake blood in a bucket, Lily is playing with pumpkin innards, and Charles is resting against a corn cob. Lucy walks into the room to inspect everything.

"Excellent fake blood, Lisa. Add some molasses for better consistency," Lucy suggested to Lisa.

"Hey Luce! Check out our pumpkins! Whaddya think?" Lynn said excitedly.

Each of them turns their jack-o'-lanterns around, revealing each gruesomely carved face.

"Hmm..." Lucy paused before pointing to a spot on Lynn's pumpkin. "More blood here," she motions around Lola's pumpkin, "a few more gashes on this one," she flicks out a tooth on Lana's pumpkin "knock out a tooth," she points to Lincoln's scabs "add some more ooze to those scabs," she pats Luna's pumpkin "dampen the head wounds." "Hmm," she thinks as she looks at Laney's Pumpkin, which has sewed eyes and mouth and cuts all over it.

"I'm sorry, Lucy. I'm not very good at carving Jack-o'-lanterns," Laney apologized, because she didn't think her pumpkin was very good.

"Laney, I'm not sure. Add some blood to the mouth and eyes, and I think we've got something," Lucy said this because she thought Laney's Jack O' Lantern was pretty good.

"Halloween's kinda crazy with a spooky little girl like you!" Luna agreed.

"Totes! I'm so glad Mom finally let you do your haunted corn maze!" Leni agreed.

"As am I. I've been waiting my whole life to do this. Not to mention my past lives," Lucy said happily.

When J.D. and Varie entered the room and saw them carving pumpkins, they greeted them.

"Hey, guys!" J.D. waved.

"Hi J.D., Hi Varie," greeted everyone.

"Hey guys," said Varie.

"Are you guys ready for the best Halloween ever?" J.D. asked, his voice brimming with excitement.

"Yeah!" cheered everyone.

"All right!" J.D. agreed and then walked over to look at their pumpkins.

"You guys made some really gruesome pumpkins," J.D. commented as he examined each of their creations. He thought each of the pumpkins was frightening in its own way.

"Thank you, J.D.," Lincoln said gratefully.

"I'm not very good at making Jack-o'-lanterns," Laney admitted, lowering her gaze.

Varie comes over and inspects Laney's pumpkin, thinking she did an excellent job, and tells her, "Laney, you did an excellent job."

"Do you really think so, Varie?" Laney asked, hopefully.

"I know so," Varie said, giving her a smile.

Lucy approaches Luan, who has just finished her sign. "Fantastic sign work, Luan. Just the right mixture of corn and gore."

"Ah, shucks! It's just something I cobbled up together from a kernel of an idea!" Luan danced a little and laughed. "Oh yes! A triple!"

"That's funny, Luan," J.D. says, laughing at her puns.

Lucy and the others groaned because they didn't find Luan's puns amusing, and someone threw a jack-o'-lantern on Luan's head.

"I'd expect more support from my "pumpkin!" Luan said through the pumpkin on her head. She laughs, and the grin on the jack-o-face lantern widens. "Get it?"

J.D. and Varie both laughed, finding it funny.

Lucy facepalmed. "Sigh..." She turned to the others to thank them for all the work they've done. "Thanks for all your hard work, guys. This is gonna be the best Halloween ever. I'm so excited." Her face shows no change in emotion.

"Trust me," Lincoln told the viewers. "She's excited," he says, pointing to Lucy.

"I understand how you feel, Lucy. I, too, adore Halloween," Laney told her.

"Really? Do you like the part where all the monsters come out of the darkness and scare people?" Lucy asked excitedly.

"That's fine. But I prefer to go out in costume and get lots of sweet, chocolaty, toothache-inducing candy..." Laney says this and then starts drooling, thinking about all the candy, Lucy snaps her fingers, and Laney snaps out of it. "So, Lucy, good luck with the maze. I'm going to prepare for tonight," Laney said as she walked away to get ready.

"Hey, Lori. Can we use the bathroom to change into our costumes?" J.D. asked.

"Go right ahead, you two," Lori replied.

"Thank you," Varie said before heading upstairs with J.D. to change.

Suddenly, static is heard, and Clyde is speaking through the walkie-talkie to contact Lincoln "Jack-o-Lincoln! Do you copy?"

The static starts again as Lincoln pulls out his walkie-talkie and turns away from Lucy. "Speaking of the best Halloween ever, Clyde and I have some pretty big plans, too." He put his walkie-talkie to his ear to communicate with Clyde. "I copy McBride of Frankenstein. Meet you at the rendezvous point in fifteen. Over."

A thump is heard from somewhere, and Lynn Sr. screamed, "AAAAAH! I hate Halloween!"

"Oh," Lucy said, drawing everyone's attention to herself. "Dad must have discovered the severed limbs I had stashed in his closet."

Later in Laney's room, while Cliff was resting on her bed, Laney was choosing a costume.

"Okay, Cliff. I want your honest opinion. Which one of my costumes would be perfect?" Laney asked and came out in a fairy princess costume. Cliff shook his head.

"You're right, too frilly, but my plant powers make me look like a magical fairy." Laney goes inside the closet and comes back out in a mummy costume. Cliff shakes his head again. "Your right, such a waste of toilet paper." Laney goes back into her closet. "Okay, how about this?" Laney comes out in a witch costume holding a broom. Cliff comes up to her and purrs. "I knew you'd like it."

The sun moves from high in the sky to set. Lisa used her protractor to measure the distance.

Lisa squeals, "Seven minutes till sunset!" She gets into the rest of her kangaroo costume and hops into the hallway. "Siblings, assemble! It's almost time for the annual ritual of deception versus confection; street name, trick or treating!"

"Oh boy!" Laney exclaimed excitedly as she exited her room and noticed Lisa dressed as a kangaroo. "Wow, Lisa. You look adorable in that kangaroo costume."

"That's the plan, dear sister," Lisa said.

Lana, dressed as Abraham Lincoln, and Lola, dressed as the Statue of Liberty, appear in their costumes.

"Four score and seven pieces of candy ago," Lana said.

"Give me your tired, your poor, your delicious treats yearning to be in my tummy!" Lola finished.

"Hmm...patriotic, but unlikely to generate maximum candy confection," Lisa shrugged, shaking her head.

"Wait, a minute. I thought you two were going to be salt and pepper shakers," Laney spoke up as she realized something.

"Yes, we are!" Lola ripped off her Lady Liberty costume, while Lana ripped off her Honest Abe costume, revealing new outfits. "We're a mermaid and a pirate as well."

"And salt and pepper shakers," Lana adds as they pull off their sea costumes to reveal the seasoning ones.

"Wouldn't it be easier to just wear one costume?" Laney asked.

"This way, we can hit each house three times," Lola explained.

"That's three times the candy," Lana added.

"Yes. I am familiar with basic multiplication. Your strategy is cute, but mine is far superior," Lisa said, adjusting her glasses.

"Going as a kangaroo," Lana scoffs. "I doubt it."

Lisa corrects her, "Kangaroo plus baby roo," and reveals Lily, who is dressed as her joey and cooing.

The twins gasped at the amazingly adorable sight.

"Exactly. That aw factor will exponentially increase my candy revenue, and the best part is, she only has one tooth, so I don't have to share," Lisa smirked.

"Clever girl," Laney said, admiring Lisa's strategy.

"I think you all look really cute," Varie said as she stepped out of the bathroom.

Varie's costume caused a gasp from Laney, Lana & Lola, Lisa, and Lily.

Varie is in her mermaid form, floating in a ball of water, with spines on her arms and back, webbed hands with claws, razor-sharp teeth, and slitted eyes red like blood.

J.D. exited the room with her, still dressed in his regular clothes.

"Wow. Varie, you look amazing," Laney exclaimed in awe.

"Thank you, Laney," Varie said, pleased that she liked it.

"Varie is dressing up as a Dark Side Mermaid," J.D. explained.

"There's a dark side to The Legend?" Lola asked, since she didn't know that.

"Yes, Lola. According to the Dark Side, for centuries, people believed mermaids were evil, bloodthirsty monsters who lured and drove sailors to their doom," J.D. explained to her.

"We got the idea while watching Pirates of the Caribbean 4: On Stranger Tides," Varie explained.

"Whoa. We saw the movie, and those mermaids were terrifying," Lana shivered as she remembered how they looked.

"Varie. You truly embody the dark side of the mermaid," Lisa praised her because Varie resembled an evil mermaid.

"Thank you very much, Lisa," Varie said.

"But, J.D., where is your costume?" Lola asked, noticing that he was not wearing one.

"I've got a special surprise in store for Lucy's corn maze," J.D. said with a smile.

"Lincoln! Clyde! Get your butts out here!" Lola yelled.

The boys open the door and reveal themselves to be dressed as British lords.

"I thought you were going as Ace Savvy and One-Eyed Jack," Lola pointed out.

"Uh, we are. We're Ace and Jack undercover, trying to crack the cause of the missing crumpets," Lincoln replied.

"Boy, you guys really don't want candy, do you?" Lisa said, raising her eyebrow.

"Yeah, you're right. We probably won't get much this year," Lincoln replied.

They snickered slyly as if they had something else in mind.

"Is it just me, or are those boys up to something?" Laney enquired suspiciously.

"It's not just you, Laney," J.D. said.

"Eh. It's most likely nothing," Lola shook her head.

"Alright, let's get some candy. Has anyone seen Dad?" Lana asked since she hadn't seen him for a while.

They could hear someone whimpering in the distance. Lola groans and storms into the bathroom.

Lynn Sr. is whimpering, "Everything is scary. I'm not sure why everything is scary."

Lola opens the shower curtain and discovers him in the bathtub.

"Are you alright, Mr. Lynn?" J.D. asked, concerned after seeing him in the bathtub, terrified.

"I'm so scared of Halloween," Lynn Sr. said, curling up in a ball and rocking back and forth.

"He gets really scared on Halloween, J.D.," Lana explained.

"It's the same thing every Halloween," Lisa added.

"It's all right, Mr. Lynn. There is nothing to be afraid of. It's just people dressed up in costumes," Varie explained.

"I'm just too scared," Lynn Sr. said, still afraid.

Lisa began to get impatient and hopped on him. "Let's go, Father! Chop chop! These candy bags won't fill themselves. Though I am working on a prototype that will do exactly that," she said in thought.

Lynn Sr. was terrified of going out on Halloween, so he made excuses for himself. "Uh, sorry, kids. I can't go. I think I have the flu. Or the plague. Or a Charley Horse."

"Ugh. We go through this every year!" Lola said, exasperated.

"Okay, grab a limb," Laney said.

As Lisa jumps off him, the twins and Laney grab each of his arms.

Lynn Sr. began to scream reluctantly. "I don't want to! I don't want to!" He is dragged out of the tub and taken somewhere.

"Your dad's doing better this year," Clyde told Lincoln.

They decide to follow them. Outside, the children chant candy, while Lynn Sr. is terrified of leaving the house. Lincoln and Clyde exchange fist bumps as they prepare to leave the group.

"Hey, where are you two going?" Lola inquired suspiciously.

"Nowhere. We, uh, just decided to go counterclockwise around the neighborhood this year," Lincoln explained as he and Clyde exchanged nervous grins.

"Seems like an odd, pointless choice. Much like your costumes," Lisa pointed out.

"I'm telling you, those two are up to something," Laney said, narrowing her eyes at the two.

"Have fun, boys." Lynn Sr. waved them off, but he notices something on his shirt and freaks out. "AH! Spider web!"

"It's just a loose thread on your shirt," Lola said unconcernedly, plucking it off.

"Well, I guess I won't be able to trick-or-treat if my shirt falls apart, right?" Lynn Sr. asked, hoping they would buy it so he wouldn't have to accompany them.

Lola was not buying what he was saying. "Nice try." She grabs and drags him as he yelps.

"Would you like me to hold your hand, Dad?" Laney asked, seeing how terrified he was. Maybe that will help him relax a little.

"Yes, please!" Lynn Sr. yelped, and Laney grabbed his hand.

Later that night, J.D., Varie, Laney, and her younger sisters set out on their trick-or-treating route, accompanied by their terrified dad. Laney is the most ecstatic about it, especially the part where people hand out candy.

Laney was enthralled by everything around her. "Wow! Look at all the people dressed up. There's a serial killer, a Frankenstein, and a werewolf!"

"Boy, everybody looks great in costumes," J.D. said, looking around at everyone dressed up for trick-or-treating.

"You know, Laney, I'm surprised you're not as scared of Halloween as dad," Lola stated as she noticed Laney was utterly calm and not freaked out.

"That's because they're just regular people dressed up as monsters. Nothing frightens me." Laney puffed up to show she wasn't afraid of anything.

Joey Anderson, dressed as Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde approached Laney and said, "Hey, Laney."

Laney screamed "AAH!" and hid behind her dad.

"Almost nothing," Lana sighed and shook her head slightly at her sister.

"Laney, calm down. It's just a costume." Joey put a hand on her shoulder to calm her down.

Laney instantly became nervous around him. "Uh, yeah. I know that... heh.. So, uh, what are you doing here?"

"Same as you, Trick-Or-Treating," Joey explained, holding up his bag before turning to face Varie. "You look amazing as a mermaid, Ms. Varie."

"Thank you, Joey," Varie said gratefully.

J.D. explained to him exactly what Varie was going as. "She's going as a mermaid from the Dark Side of the Legend. You look great as Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, Joey. It's one of my favorite stories," J.D. said, liking his costume.

Joey was taken aback by the explanation and pleased that he liked the costume. Still, he noticed J.D. wasn't wearing one and questioned him about it. "Thank you so much, J.D. Where is your costume?"

"I've planned a special surprise for Lucy's corn maze at the Loud House. It will frighten you to death," J.D. elaborated.

Joey was excited to see what he had in store and said, "I can't wait to see it," before looking at the twins' costumes and saying, "And what adorable costumes you have."

"Thank you," they both said, smiling at the compliment.

"Would you like to join us? We're about to hit the next house," Laney said, hoping he would.

"Sure! I could always go for more candy in my bag," Joey agreed.

"Hah! I doubt you could get more candy than us!" Lola scoffed.

"What do you mean?" Joey asked curiously.

"We have a system," Lana explained.

"Watch and Learn," Lola advised. The twins go up to the first house in their patriotic costumes and knock as the door opens.

"Trick or treat!" they shouted, clutching their bags.

"Oh, aren't you two adorable?" says Diem Dona as she hands them their candy.

As the door closes, there's another knock, this time from the twins, who are now dressed in their aquatic outfits.

"Trick or treat!" they both exclaimed once more.

The lady mistook the twins for two different people and was easily fooled by their costumes. "How cute!" exclaimed Diem as she handed them more candy.

Another knock on the door, and the twins are in their condiment costumes.

"Trick or treat!" they shouted one more time.

Diem was still unaware that the two people in front of her had simply changed their costumes. "Nice costumes," she says as she hands them more candy.

"Thank you!" they exclaimed before rejoining the group.

J.D. and Varie return to the group, their pillowcases stuffed with candy.

"Great job, you two," J.D. said, seeing the candy in their bags.

"And that's how it's done. One house, six pieces of candy," Lana said, giving Lola a high five.

"Impressive," Joey said and nodded, impressed by their strategy.

"You should see how Lisa does it," Laney explained.

"Does she also wear three costumes at the same time?" Joey was perplexed.

"Nope. She's devised a clever strategy," J.D. said, liking Lisa's plan to get more candy.

Lisa hops up to the door and knocks as it opens. "Trick or treat!" she exclaimed.

"That's so sweet. A kangaroo." Diem likes her costume and is getting ready to give her her candy.

"And a baby roo," Lisa added, and then Lily popped out of Lisa's pouch and cooed.

Diem was overwhelmed by the cuteness. "Aww!" She gave Lisa every piece in her bowl right away.

Lisa hopped away. "Thank you!" She said contentedly to the twins, "Ha. One house, 87 pieces of candy."

"Wow, Laney. Your sisters are very clever." Joey said, impressed at how much candy they got.

"Thanks. But if you ask me, I prefer to do things the old-fashioned way," Laney replied, approaching the door and knocking on it. Diem pulls it open. Laney declared, "Trick or Treat."

"I adore your little witch costume. But I'm afraid I've run out of candy. That adorable little kangaroo got them all."Diem apologized and shut the door.

Laney walks back to the group, looking depressed. "Aw."

"No worries, Laney. The night is still young. There are plenty more houses to go," Lola told her, hoping to cheer her up.

"Here, Laney, take some of mine," J.D. said. He gave her half of the candy in his pillowcase, containing full-size candy bars and mini-candy bars.

"Wow! Thank you very much, J.D. You're a true friend," Laney said while looking at all the candy he had given her.

"Let us show you where we got all of this," J.D. explained.

They walk three doors down to a house with the door open and go inside, where they find a massive cauldron filled to the brim with candy and a sign that says "Help yourselves."

"Behold!" Varie said, pointing to the candy-filled cauldron.

Laney yelled excitedly, "JACKPOT!"

Laney, Joey, Lana, Lola, and Lisa stuffed their pillowcases with candy.

They return outside 5 minutes later and go to Lynn Sr.

"Wow! You guys hit the motherlode!" Lynn Sr. said, seeing how much candy they had.

"There's a treasure trove of candy in that house over there, Daddy." Lola pointed to the house with the open door.

Lynn Sr. screams in fear as the wind blows eerily behind him. "A ghost just touched me!" He collapses on the spot.

Lola shakes his face to wake him up. "Wake up, Daddy!"

Lisa approaches them, pulling a wagon. "Never fear, siblings. I've prepared for this possibility."

They drag Lynn Sr. on the wagon for the rest of the trick-or-treating.

"Is your dad always like this?" Joey asked Laney, worried about her dad.

"He's always afraid of Halloween," Laney explained, waving it off.

J.D. had a feeling something was going to happen.

"Uh-oh! I detect a disturbance in the Force," J.D. said worriedly.

"What's wrong, J.D.?" Laney asked, seeing his expression.

He notices two familiar faces. It was Hawk and Hank from Hazeltucky High School.

J.D. is taken aback when he sees the two and becomes worried. "It's Hawk and Hank, and they've come to ruin our Halloween. Come on guys, let's go back to the Loud House."

They dashed back to the Loud House and arrived safely.

They decided to stash their candy in the basement.

Lincoln and Clyde run in that direction. As Lincoln and Clyde arrive at the intersection of Franklin and Olive, the children are out trick-or-treating. Still, they hear Hank and Hawk laughing, and run and hide inside the nearby bush.

"Franklin Avenue. Ha! Score!" Hank said. He and Hawk put on disturbing baby masks, laughed, and headed down Lincoln's street. The boys pop out as soon as they leave.

Clyde was terrified when he saw the masks. "Those baby masks are definitely creepy."

Lincoln agreed, but then he realized something and said, "True. But they have no idea where the true score is. Is that right, buddy?"

"I can't wait to tell Dr. Lopez about this. But should I tell her in group, or wait for our one-on-one?" Clyde asked.

"Without a doubt, group. You might be able to inspire someone," Lincoln responds, and they proceeded to the manor.

A flock of bats returns to the Loud House, where Lucy steps out wearing a grim reaper costume, turns on the lights for her corn maze, and brings in a bucket of fake blood.

Lucy spoke through a megaphone. "All right, everyone, places."

"I really like your Grim Reaper costume, Lucy," J.D. stated.

"Thank you, J.D," Lucy said.

Rita walks out of the house, moaning and groaning like a zombie. "How's that?" she asked, chuckling as she pretended to be a zombie.

"Hmm... not quite there yet. I believe we need to lose a limb." Lucy says thoughtfully before pulling out a chainsaw.

Rita begins to panic and flinch, believing Lucy is about to cut off her arm, and screams, "NO, LUCY, NO!"

Lynn comes out of the house dressed like a masked serial killer.

"Here, Lynn. Don't forget your chainsaw," Lucy said, holding it out to her.

"Tear some heads off, Lynn," J.D. said, admiring her outfit and encouraging her.

Lynn grabs it and dashes into the maze.

Rita exhaled a sigh of relief as Lynn ran away with the chainsaw and said, "Ah."

Lucy pulls up the sleeve of her mom's shirt to conceal her mother's arm. "All you need is some homemade blood, and you're ready to go." She smears it on her armless sleeve.

"Honey, you're a true pro I should have let you do this years ago," Rita told her, seeing how good she was at this.

"That's okay, Mom. I'm just glad to finally get my chance. I'm so thrilled, I can barely contain myself," Lucy said, with no change of emotion on her face.

"I know, honey. I can see it all over your face," Rita replied, since she could tell she was excited.

"You look fantastic as a zombie, Ms. Rita," J.D. said, complimenting her costume.

"Thank you, J.D.," Rita said, delighted that he liked it.

Lori, dressed as a vampiress, walks in.

"I literally vant to suck your blood," Lori says in a Transylvanian accent, flips her hair, and is stopped by Lucy.

"Countess Loricula. You are free to suck my blood at any time," J.D. said with a Transylvanian accent, and Lori and J.D. both laughed menacingly. They hiss at each other and then laugh normally.

"Lori, you look amazing and truly terrifying as a Vampiress. Bobby would love you like this," J.D. said, giving her a smile.

"Thank you very much, J.D.," Lori said.

"Ms. Rita, could you please take a picture of me and Lori? I'd like to make some photographs for Bobby," J.D. asked.

"Sure," Rita replied, showing that she would be delighted to take a photograph.

He hands his phone to Rita, who takes three photos of him and Lori. One of them was smiling, the second was of them hissing, and the last was of them looking at each other with menacing expressions.

"Perfect," Rita said, admiring the photos she had taken.

"Thank you, Ms. Rita," J.D. said as he took his phone from her.

Lucy looked at Lori and realized she needed something to make her look more like a vampire. "Hmm. Something is missing." "Fangs, here!" she yelled into her megaphone.

Fangs flew in and perched on Lori's shoulder, causing her to scream.

"If you want to make it more authentic, he could bite your neck," Lucy suggested.

Lori quickly objected to that idea. "No! I mean, this is fine."

J.D. had an idea to save Fang from biting Lori and said, "I have a better idea." He dipped two of his fingers into some fake blood. "Lori, please come here."

Lori smiled, relieved, and said, "Oh, I get it." Lori shows him her neck, and he dabs fake blood onto it to make bite marks.

"There. Now you look like a real vampiress," J.D. said, admiring his work.

"Thank you, J.D.," Lori said before entering the maze.

Luan emerges from the house dressed as Dr. Frankenstein, accompanied by Mr. Coconuts as her Frankenstein monster. As Luan laughs evilly.

"I love your Mad Scientist costume, Luan. You look INSANELY SCIENTIFICIAL!" J.D. joked, and he loved her costume.

"Thanks, J.D," Luan says, laughing at his pun.

"Luan, why did the skeleton go to the Library?" J.D. asked.

"Why?" Luan asked.

"To BONE UP on a few things!" J.D. joked, and then he and Luan laughed at it.

"Wait a minute, Luan. Your monster requires more stitches," Lucy said before drawing some on Mr. Coconuts.

"That's sew much better!" Luan laughed at her own pun. "Get it?"

J.D. laughs and says, "Good one."

"No puns in the maze," Lucy told Luan, causing her shoulders to slump in disappointment.

Luan enters the maze, disappointed. Leni emerges from the house as Marie Antoinette, her head missing. She falls down the stairs because she can't see where she's going.

"Looks great, Leni. But don't forget this," Lucy said, taking out the head in the fridge earlier.

Leni pokes her head out, gasps for air, sees the head, and wonders, "Why do I have to look so pale?"

"You've just been decapitated," Lucy explains.

"Well, I'd still put on a little blush," Leni responded.

"You look fantastic as Marie Antoinette, Leni. A well-known French historical figure is ideal for this," J.D. explains, since he thought Leni was a great Marie Antoinette.

"Thank you, J.D.," Leni said, relieved that he had approved.

"You're going to make a lot of heads roll, Leni." J.D. joked.

"Good one, J.D.!" Luan laughed from deep within the maze upon hearing his pun.

"Thanks, Luan!" J.D. yelled back.

Lucy places Geo's head on his hamster ball as he rolls in. Leni takes a deep breath and ducks her head as she and Geo enter the maze. Luna appears, dressed as a skeleton with a pipe organ.

"Ready to rock, mistress of the dark," Luna says as she begins to play the pipe organ.

"Let's make this," J.D. said, holding a flashlight in front of his face for a more dramatic and horrifying effect. "A HALLOWEEN TO REMEMBER!" he exclaimed in a demonic voice. He then laughs demonically.

"Great diabolical laugh J.D. and Luna, drop down an octave and try it in D minor. That's the spookiest key," Lucy told them.

Luna begins to play it in D minor, and Lucy pulls out her megaphone. "Okay, guys, the Loud Family haunted corn maze is now open for business. Let's hear some screams, people." She creeps into the maze with her hood, scythe, and blood.

J.D. told Lucy, "Me, Varie, and Laney are going to find Lincoln and Clyde."

Lincoln and Clyde pass through the gates of Huntington Manor disguised.

"Fancy visiting a few flats and loading up on some proper sweets?" Clyde says in a British accent. Clyde asks in a normal voice, "Didn't you read the British study guide I sent you?" Lincoln looks at him, puzzled.

"Sorry, I only got through the first ten pages," Lincoln says, pulling out the guide.

They walk up to the gate, and Wyatt notices them. He tips his hat and greets them. "Master Nigel. Master Alister. I thought you were in England." He then opens the gate for them.

"We got all the way over there and then we realized we had forgotten to feed Nigel's fish," Lincoln explained in a British accent.

In a British accent, Clyde said, "So we took off right away, and Bob's your uncle. So, ta ta."

When Wyatt heard their explanation, he became suspicious and said, "Not so fast, boys."

Lincoln and Clyde have come to a halt, believing they've been busted.

"Next time, call me and I'll feed your fish," Wyatt says as he hands Clyde a business card.

"Thanks, well, shredded wheat, old boy," Lincoln replied in a British accent.

"It's cheerio," Clyde quietly corrected in his normal voice.

They dash into the neighborhood, removing their master costumes to reveal their hero costumes.

"We're done with the tricks, and now for the treats," Lincoln said, exchanging fist bumps with him.

Later, Lincoln and Clyde are walking down the street with their sacks loaded.

"What a haul! Maybe we should take it to your house because my sisters will pounce on it," Lincoln said worriedly.

"Well, if we take it to my house, my dads will lock it up and only let me have three ounces a week." Clyde pointed out.

"Hmm. We need a Plan C," Lincoln said, and then they eventually decided to bury it underground. Later, they arrived at the intersection of Franklin and Olive.

"Our hard work has paid off, Clyde. Best Halloween ever," Lincoln said with a smile, since they got lots of candy.

J.D., Varie, Laney, and Joey approached them, relieved they had found them.

"Lincoln, Clyde, thank goodness we found you. The corn maze is starting," J.D. explained.

"Thank you for telling us guys. Let's go," Lincoln replied.

J.D. and Lincoln exchange high fives and turn the corner, only to discover that the jack-o'-lanterns have been smashed, toilet paper is in the trees, candy wrappers are all over the ground, and Franklin Avenue is in complete shambles.

When Lincoln saw the damage, he was shocked and said, "Well...maybe not for everyone."

"What exactly happened here?" Varie inquired, taking in all the damage.

End of Act 1

Act 2

When the group arrives, the girls are in the process of closing the maze.

"What's going on, guys? Why are the streets empty, and why are you demolishing your maze?" Lincoln asks them, demanding to know what happened.

Lucy decided to explain. "Nobody turned up. All of my efforts have been in vain. There was not a single scream. Sigh."

"Nobody showed up? Why not?" Clyde asked, surprised.

"Because two big stinkers came along and ruined everything," Lola spit in disgust.

"Yeah! They smashed all the Jack-o'-lanterns and TP'd all the trees," Lana explained angrily.

"Worse yet, they stole everyone else's candy!" Lola was almost in tears when she said this.

When Lincoln and Clyde learned what had happened, they huddled together and discussed it.

"Two big stinkers? You don't think it was the guys we told to come here, do you?" Clyde asked worriedly.

"Clyde, no way. There are a lot of big jerks in our neighborhood." Lincoln shook his head because he didn't think it was them.

"True," Clyde agreed.

"I'll never be able to shake the sound of their big dumb laughs," Lana lamented.

"Wait. Didn't those guys have big dumb laughs?" Clyde became worried once more.

"Clyde, there are a lot of people who have big dumb laughs," Lincoln explained.

"True," Clyde agreed, but was still worried.

"And I'll never forget those creepy baby-faced masks!" Lola snarled.

"Wait. Didn't those guys-" Clyde began, but Lincoln cut him off because he knew where Clyde was going with it. "All right, Clyde, it was them."

"Ugh. All Hallow's Eve, also known as Halloween, has clearly been ruined," Lisa said, irritated.

The other sisters go back inside, distraught over what has occurred. Lily crawls by, sighing in despair.

Lincoln's conscience is racked with guilt. "Clyde, it's all our fault! We drove those jerks right down my street!"

"We ruined Halloween!" yelled Lincoln and Clyde together.

"Why didn't Dr. Lopez warn me about the dangers of looking out for me?" Clyde wondered.

"We gotta fix this, Clyde," Lincoln said, determined to clean up the mess he and Clyde had created.

"I'm with you. But how?" Clyde agreed, but he didn't know how to begin.

J.D. overheard their conversation, agreed with everything they said, and told them, "This time, Hawk and Hank have gone too far! Fortunately, they didn't take all of our candy, and we did a good job hiding it. Come on, everyone. Let's go get them!"

Later, J.D., Varie, Lincoln, Laney, and Clyde are seen walking the streets without their costumes.

"First, we gotta find those guys. But it won't be easy. We don't even know where to start looking," Lincoln said.

Clyde notices something on the ground and asks, "How about that trail of candy wrappers?"

Lincoln looks around, notices the trail Clyde mentioned, and says, "That should work."

They follow the trail until the wrappers are blown away by a gust of wind.

"No, our trail!" Lincoln yelled, attempting but failing to grab some of the wrappers.

Clyde shakes Lincoln vigorously in fear and asks, "What are we going to do now?"

They were about to leave when they heard familiar laughter not far away.

Since they recognized the laughter, Lincoln and Clyde exclaimed, "The big dumb laughs!"

"I've got an idea," J.D. said, his eyes narrowing in the laughter's direction.

He dials Lucy's number, and she responds, "You rang?"

"Lucy, how would you like to have your haunted maze after all?" J.D. asks with a slight smirk, since he felt those two would have a frightful time.

Lucy emerges from her coffin with a slight smile, knowing that her haunted maze would take place after all.

They arrived at Hawk and Hanks Treehouse. J.D. approaches the tree's base and delivers a powerful chop that slices through it, causing it to fall. "TIMBER!" J.D. screamed as the tree fell to the ground. Hawk and Hank emerge from the ruins of their former treehouse.

"Our treehouse!" Hank yelled, staring at the location of the former treehouse.

"Hello, Jerks!" J.D. yelled, causing Hawk and Hank to look at him and notice him cracking his knuckles.

"J.D., what are you doing here?" Hank asked, slightly nervous.

"I'm here to kick your butts all the way to the Moon," J.D. said, glaring at the two who ruined Lucy's maze.

"Do you think you can beat us?" Hawk asked, a little arrogant and a little scared.

"We'll never know unless I try," J.D. said, shrugging his shoulders.

"Let's go get him!" Hawk yelled to Hank, and they leap out of the treehouse rubble and charge at J.D., who punches Hawk in the face, kicks Hank in the stomach, punches him in the mouth, and kicks Hawk in the nose. Hawk and Hawk fell, and J.D. Varie, Laney, and the boys fled.

"All right, let's go!" J.D. yelled to the rest of the group.

"Those guys are dead!" Hawk yelled angrily as he stood up with a black eye.

They attempt to climb over a log, but the stinkers plow right through it. On a lake, they hop over stones, but the stinkers charge on top of the water. When the stinkers try to cross another log acting as a bridge, their combined weight breaks the bridge, causing them to fall, scream, and climb up with their bare hands. They arrived back in town.

Hawk comes to a halt, clutching his stomach in pain. "Oh no, stomach cramps!"

"Oh, man! I'll get a cramp if you get a cramp," Hank sighed.

J.D. looks at the two bullies and begins taunting them, "What's wrong, Buttfaces? Can't run as fast as your stomachs can carry you?"

The stinkers growled at him in anger at that remark.

"You are Dead!" Hawk screamed and lunged at him.

Varie begins taunting them. "Catch us if you can, Losers!"

"Go!" Lincoln yelled at everyone. The chase continues to the corn maze, with the stinkers preparing to pummel them as they rush in.

"They're ours now," Hank smirked, believing they had caught them.

Lincoln and Clyde ducked into a few corn plants and lost Hawk and Hank.

"It worked! We got them in here," Clyde cheered quietly so they wouldn't hear him.

The stinkers are still looking for them but cannot locate them.

Hawk is becoming frightened, his eyes darting back and forth, and he says, "It's really dark in here."

"Man up, bro! I want that candy," Hank said, refusing to admit that he was getting a little scared. Laney was in the corn maze, staring at the stinkers, and she said, "Okay, Stinkers. Let's see what scares you..." The lights in the maze suddenly go out.

"What's that?" Hank asks, seeing that the lights are out.

Luna starts singing while playing her organ somewhere in the maze.

"When darkness falls on the house of Loud

Around every corner, new terror abounds

You don't want to lose your head! Ha ha ha!"

You can run, but you can't hide

They know that you taste better alive

I don't think that they've been fed

In a long, long time

Every corner, every floor

Watch out. They ain't herbivores

Ghastly ghouls out for blood

Sorry, bud

You got tricked

You got tricked

You got punked and pranked with a spooky twist

Before you wet your pants, better get out quick

Tricked, tricked, tricked

You got...tricked

Beware of fangs and bloody fur

A Loud House chainsaw massacre

There's no chance that you'll get out

Ghosts writing your eulogy

Heads are rolling literally

So, who needs their mommy now?

Spilling guts on the floor

Clean up on aisle four

Why are you running off so soon?

Sorry dude

You got tricked

You got tricked

You got punked and pranked with a spooky twist

Before you wet your pants, better get out quick

Tricked, tricked, tricked

You got...tricked."

The Loud Sisters scare the stinkers with everything they throw at them during the montage. Luan brings Mr. Coconuts to life, Lisa and Lily act rabid, Lori acts as if she's been feasting on Rita, Lynn pulls out her chainsaw, Lola appears as a corpse, Lana acts as her ghost, and Leni walks around blindly under her dress with Geo rolling in his ball with the fake head still on, Laney was stirring a monster-filled pot and cackled like a real witch.

Varie was in her dark side mermaid form, and she terrified the stinkers by snarling and hissing at them and spraying them with water that smelled really bad.

J.D. finally revealed his surprise. He began to change with his hair covering his eyes. He morphed into a gruesome and horrific monstrosity laden with blood, guts, body parts, tentacles, and other abominations. He was a mash-up of every terrifying monster from the film THE THING! The monsters came from the 1982 and 2011 films and the 2002 video game. Lightning flashed behind the monstrosity, and flames from the Netherworld flickered around it, scaring the stinkers so much that they soiled their pants three times. And everything else in the maze terrifies them to the point where the sounds of their screams catch the attention of the other kids on the block, and their screams also catch the attention of a nearby police car. The stinkers collide with Lucy, who is blocking the exit.

"The crimes you committed this evening will not go unpunished. You reap what you sow," Lucy said before slashing a rope with her scythe and dumping a bucket of fake blood on them, causing them to scream.

"Blood!" Hank yelled, believing it to be real blood.

"I'm about to puke!" Hawk yelled, his face turning green.

"If you're going to puke, I'm going to puke!" Hank said quickly.

A tentacle with a terrifying flesh flower covered in blood and slime appears in front of their faces, tentacles emerge and slap their faces, and the stinkers vomit all over the ground. Lucy gives a small smile of satisfaction as they run out screaming.

"We're not...coming back here...again," Hank says, still nauseous.

He and Hawk flee, and a police car arrives, with officers inside.

"You got...tricked," Luna sang, concluding her song.

"You two are under arrest," an officer said.

Everyone applauds when the maze scare is a success.

"That was awesome!" exclaimed Lana.

"That was so awesome!" agreed Leni.

"Thanks, guys. I think we taught those two big stinkers a lesson," Lincoln said.

"No, thank you and J.D. for bringing them here. You totally made my Halloween. I've never been happier," Lucy said. Once again, little to no change of emotion on her. Clyde examines her face.

"Trust me, she's happy," Lincoln told him.

They saw the officers slap Hawk and Hank with handcuffs.

"Nice corn maze you guys got here," one officer commented.

"Thank you, Officer Stacy," J.D. said, nodding.

"We saw the whole thing. Great job, guys," the other officer congratulated them.

"Thank you, officers," Rita said gratefully.

J.D. glared angrily at Hawk and Hank for a moment, causing them to take a step back before turning to the officers and telling them what they had done. "These buttfaces deserved it. They ruined everyone's Halloween by TP-ing the trees, destroying our pumpkins, and taking all of our candy."

"Is that correct?" Officer Stacy asked, folding her arms and turning to Hawk and Hank. "Well, you two are in for a rough time."

"How about 5 to 10 in the pokey?" J.D. suggested, causing everyone to laugh.

"Guys, you made a fantastic corn maze. Let's go, you two," said the other officer before leading them to the police car and putting them in the back seat, closing the door.

"Anything! Get us out of here!" Hawk yelled as he looked out the window of the police car, but his cries for help were ignored.

"Happy Halloween, everyone," Officer Stacy said, nodding.

"Happy Halloween, Officers," J.D. said before the officers jumped in their car and drove away, taking the two to jail.

"J.D. Your. Surprise. Was. AWESOME!" Lincoln yelled, pumping his fist into the air.

Valerie and the Louds cheered wildly, agreeing that it was both a great surprise and a frightening one.

"Thanks, guys. I have shape-shifting powers. I wanted to do something really special tonight," J.D. explained.

"What was all that you turned into?" Clyde asked curiously.

J.D. had a feeling someone would ask, so he decided to explain. "It was a mash-up of every gruesome monster from my favorite Science-Fiction Horror Film: The Thing. This film was created in 1982 and again in 2011. It's about an extraterrestrial shape-shifting alien organism that can perfectly imitate lifeforms and terrorizes two camps in Antarctica, killing many people. I decided to perform a terrifying transformation in which I became all of the monsters from both the movies and the video game in one ."

"That was an incredible transformation, J.D.," Laney said.

"Thank you, Laney," J.D. said, pleased that she enjoyed it.

Lincoln turned to Lucy, sad for her, and said, "Hopefully, your maze will have more than two customers next year, Lucy."

Rita looks around the corner and notices something that will make Lucy and everyone else happy. "It appears that we won't have to wait until next year."

Everyone looked where she was looking, surprised because every kid in the neighborhood had shown up for the maze.

Lucy quickly grabbed her megaphone and yelled, "Places, everyone!"

Joey joins the other kids as the girls return to the maze.

"Laney!" Joey yelled when he saw her.

"Joey!" Laney yelled, surprised to see him.

Joey was ecstatic as he described what he saw. "I saw everything! Whatever was in that maze terrified those guys to death!"

Laney concurred. "Yep! And you can thank these guys for bringing all of this back to life."

Joey approached J.D. and complimented him on his transformation. "J.D., that transformation of yours was absolutely stunning!"

"Thank you, Joey. Those two had it coming to them," J.D. nodded in appreciation.

"Also, thank you, Laney. But it's a shame no one got any candy, "Lincoln stated, and then he had an epiphany.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Clyde asked, seeing Lincoln's expression.

"Come on, let's go get our shovels!" Lincoln said.

Lincoln, J.D., Varie, and Clyde are handing out full-size bars to the kids who had their candy stolen.

"Trick or treat!" shouted a girl dressed as a ballerina.

"Here you go," Clyde said as Lincoln handed her a candy bar.

"Lovely Ballerina Costume," J.D. told her.

"Thank you," said the girl dressed as a ballerina before leaving.

"Trick or treat!" shouted a boy dressed as Harry Potter.

Lincoln gives him a candy bar. "And here you go."

"Great Harry Potter Costume," Varie said to the kid.

"Thank you," the boy dressed as Harry Potter said as he walked away. The next kid was dressed as a robot and said, "TRICK OR TREAT," in a faux metallic voice.

Lincoln hands him a candy bar, and Lincoln's younger sisters rush up to get theirs. "Trick or treat!" said Lola, Lana, Laney, and Lisa.

Lincoln gives them each a candy bar.

"Ooh!" exclaimed Lola as she examined the candy bar.

Lana was surprised that the candy bars were full-sized. "Full-sized candy bars? No way!"

"Wow. Where did you get these amazing specimens?" Lisa asked, her gaze drawn to the candy bars.

"It's a long story. Let's just say we have a great place to take you guys trick-or-treating next Halloween," Lincoln said with a smile.

"You just need a British accent," Clyde said, winking at Lincoln, who returned the wink.

Laney takes a bite out of her chocolate bar. "Mmmm! So good!"

His sisters flee, and a boy dressed as a mummy appears next, saying, "Trick or treat!"

Lincoln presents him with a candy bar.

"Awesome Mummy Costume," Varie said.

"Thank you," said the boy dressed as a mummy before leaving.

Lola and Lana return to get more candy, dressed as salt and pepper shakers. "Trick or treat!"

Lincoln was too smart to fall for their trick to get more candy and simply said, "Nice try."

"Good try, you two," J.D. said.

The twins are duped by their brother and do not receive any candy. The last person to come up for candy is a girl dressed as a hot dog.

"Trick or treat!" she exclaimed.

Lincoln hands her the last candy bar in his bag.

"Great Hot Dog Costume," J. D. said.

"Thank you," she said before leaving.

"That's everybody," Clyde said, not seeing anyone else approaching to get candy.

"Fantastic, and the rest of the candy bars are all ours," Lincoln exclaimed cheerfully.

"Well..." Clyde pauses before reaching in and pulling out a single fun-size bar, "...there's actually only this one."

Lincoln shrugged because it wasn't a big deal. "Okay, that's fine. It was just as much fun to give them away as it was to receive them. Splitsies?"

Clyde agreed. "Sure."

They divide the candy bar in half, and each takes half.

"Thanks, Jack-O-Lincoln. Happy Halloween," Clyde said.

"Happy Halloween, McBride of Frankenstein," Lincoln said.

"This has truly been the best Halloween ever. But the best part was that I got to share it with Varie and my best friends," J.D. cheerfully informed them.

When they heard that, Lincoln, Varie, Laney, Lola, Lana, Lisa, and Clyde came over and hugged him.

"Happy Halloween everyone," J.D. smiled.

"Happy Halloween, J.D!" yelled Varie and the Loud Kids.

Lynn Sr. finally awakens, relieved that Halloween is over, and says. "Oh, thank God it's all over." He screams after hearing a thump. "Wait, what was that?" He sees Marie's head, still rolled underneath by Geo, colliding with the wagon and screams one last time. "I hate Halloween!"

Hawk and Hank were both charged with vandalism and Grand Theft Candy.

They were sentenced to three years in the Detroit Juvenile Correctional Facility and 1500 hours of community service. (187 days and 12 hours = 8 hours per day)

THE END.