A bit of a delay with this one, but I am sure it will be worth it. A note before reading, I went back and edited the Breakfast at Jericho's chapter to include a line about Eevee in order for a certain aspect I forgot about to make sense in this chapter :)

Chapter Fifty One: The Mind That Never Sleeps

The rain continued to pour down, and Alaska continued to run.

Rivers of storm water raged through the drainpipes of Celadon City, rubbish and leaves being swept up and sent racing through these murky streams. The river that cut through the city roared as well as the sudden storm refused to stop, the levels of rain likely to make the usually crystal blue ribbon of beauty flood the surrounding the streets. Trees stood valiantly against the wind, but their leaves were sent scattered like lost soldiers, while aged traffic lights and street poles were being pushed to their limits, rims of rust struggling to hold them up. People were sheltered in their homes and in stores, waiting out the raging weather that was so unusual for the Rainbow City, Celadonians waiting patiently for things to return to normal.

And still, Alaska ran.

Her feet splashed through puddles, letting so much water in that they were starting to weigh her down. Alaska was chilled to the bone, parts of her skin turning unfavourable shades of blue and purple, her clothes stuck to her skin, more water than fabric now. It was uncomfortable to run in drenched jeans, but Alaska ignored the discomfort, the pain in her mouth, nose, head and heart overpowering.

I lost… I never thought I would, but I've lost… I lost, I lost, I fucking, fucking lost!

Alaska wasn't sure if she was crying anymore, but she could still taste blood in her mouth and feel it within her nose. She could injure herself worse so if she kept running in her condition, but Alaska had to put distance between herself and what had just happened. She had to distance herself from everything. The weight of all the destruction that had followed her through Kanto, the guilt of all the harm she had caused to strangers and friends, the pressure being put on her by all these different groups and all their agendas… Alaska needed a chance to breathe, to think, to cope with all of it, but no one was considering giving her the courtesy.

"Pidge Pidge Otto Pidgey!" Paige cried as she drew level with Alaska, who turned down another street, not even paying attention to the skyscrapers that dwarfed her or the cars that were basically swimming through the streets. Come on Paige, give me some time to think! Alaska thought. I just released Darwin… I think… I could always call him back, but do I want to call him back? I should have trained him, I never focussed on my Pokemon enough! Wait, I did, didn't I? I spent two weeks training while Sandy was in hospital, doesn't that count?

"AAAAAAHHHHHH!" Alaska screamed, the only way she could silence the thoughts in her head. Paige looked startled, and Alaska instantly felt more guilt: the Pidgeotto didn't deserve this. She had been with Alaska through everything she had ever been through, and was sticking with her even though the rain had soaked her as well. "Oh Paige, I wish you could carry me in your claws or hold me on your back. Than we would be able to fly away from all of this and start a new life. I could become… oh, I don't know, Montana Magno! You can pretend to be a boy. I shall call you Otto!" Paige laughed, and Alaska managed a smile as well, though she knew that there was no way she could really leave this. I want to keep fighting, even though they will not let me. I want to get those next five badges, I want to battle Red, I want to be a Champion! But if I keep this up, how deeper will I get in Gideon's war? Who else will I lose before it ends?

Alaska could feel tears coming once more, as well as pain throughout her entire body. She was afraid that if she stopped her legs might give way, her head may take it as a sign to stop and she would never get any answers. But as Alaska turned a corner, wishing she could jump in a pit of fire, the only thing that would warm her up after this, she saw a familiar house in the distance.

Must I? Alaska thought, even though her feet had decided to go there anyway. I do need shelter, but I would rather go jump in an ice bath than go there… though, let's be fair, it will be like going into an ice bath stepping through there…

But the storm showed no signs of stopping, and Alaska knew she would be welcome there if Evelyn had not relayed news of her actions yet, so she pounded towards the Athlew Mansion, the giant mound of white glimmering in the rain, its beauty not yet tarnished by the storm, instead glowing against a charcoal backdrop.

The guard at the gates recognized her and let her through, though seemed suspicious of her arriving alone. Alaska was not fussed by that and power walked her way up the tarmac driveway stained an even richer black by the rain. She looked around at the beauty she had only seen through a tinted car window this morning; tall trees with lush green leaves, a wide field of perfectly mown grass, priceless, vintage cars parked together by a red bricked garage, gazebos, fountains, statues, all spread out across this expansive property. The house itself was a three storey white giant, the building looking bigger than all the homes on Alaska's street in Viridian put together. It was big and beautiful, looking even more radiant the closer Alaska and Paige got to it.

Will I ever be able to live like this? Alaska asked herself as she got closer. She had always dreamed of living in a giant house, surrounded by wealth and wonderful Pokemon, being able to live the life she had never been able to experience. I still want that, some day… but how am I going to get there? I will probably not even survive until the end of next week at the rate I'm going. I've nearly been killed more times than I can even count, Sandy came a millimetre from death, Trevor is probably dead or drying somewhere… and I somehow keep on going. I should have been the one that got shot, not Sandy, she never asked for any of this. I was the one that started everything. If only I had just kept my nose out of it at the museum, and then at Mt Moon… this is all my fault… none of this could have ever happened if I hadn't gone on this stupid journey…

"Pidgey!" Paige cried, but Alaska had to ignore her as she took off once again, the tears flowing once more, this time at a more recognizable rate. The guilt came washing over her as if the wind was blowing it back, and Alaska's mind began racing again, screaming a million different thoughts at her at once: you face your greatest challenge yet… you must find balance before you can win… I hope you are prepared for the consequences for your actions today… But Alaska, I think you are just as stupid as you think I am…

The front doors opened a minute after Alaska began banging on them, but she didn't notice when they moved, punching and kicking in mid air, tears and blood and rain washing across her face. The maid gasped in shock before she realised, and Alaska ran in, the sound of wings showing Paige following directly behind her.

"Miss Acevedo, please remain there, we must fetch you a towel immediately!" One of the butlers from breakfast said in a crisp voice. Alaska looked down to see a puddle had already formed around her, and she could feel warmth of the house seeping through her damp, ruined clothing, but a chill still went down her spine, her mind continuing to race.

"Miss, stay still!" The maid shouted as Alaska took off, but she went ignored like everyone else as Alaska raced for the staircase. She didn't even know where she was going, but she had to put some distance between herself and those around her. Paige flew after her as Alaska raced up one staircase and rounded for the next, passing more servants who were stunned at the presence of an unfamiliar, dripping teenage girl running throughout the pristine white house. Alaska took little of the house's design in as she ran, leaving sodden and dirty footprints everywhere, Paige struggling to keep up. They passed the group of Eevee that had been playing in the garden earlier that day, all of them looking as stunned as the servants. Alaska remembered Sandy mentioning something in the limousine about how cute they were, but that only made her think of Sandy again, and the tears kept flowing.

She reached the top level and came to a stop, realised there was no where else to run, only places to hide. Alaska thought of going into a bedroom or the bathroom, but they would be easily able to find her, and what would she do then? Only now did she think of the fact she was inside the house of Jericho and Evelyn Athlew, two people that wanted to stop her from ever fighting again. Idiot, idiot, IDIOT! I lost, I lost, I lost again!

"Pidge Ottoooo!" Paige cried, and Alaska turned, her vision blurred from her tears and the rain, but saw the Bird Pokemon pointing with her right wing towards a set of glass double doors at the end of the hallway, showing the grey world they had just left behind.

"Perfect," Alaska said through a sob, and she rushed forwards. The door zoomed up to her, and Alaska flung it open. The cold instantly raced back to her, but the doors were covered by a large shelter that extended for several metres, protecting them from the storm. Alaska looked around and saw she had entered a rooftop vegetable garden, the produce contained within large wooden boxes dotted around, with a wooden table and chairs seated in the middle and a greenhouse on the far side. The sound of rain hammering against the panes echoed across the empty roof, and Alaska suddenly felt alone, cut off, secluded. It was a chilling feeling, though now that Alaska had stopped moving, all the physical pains were hitting her at once: coldness, aching muscles through the lower half of her body, sickness in her stomach, shooting pain in her nose, the metallic taste of blood on her lips, the constant rattling in her head…

"I am not sure I can take this anymore," Alaska whispered to Paige, disgusted at the whimper in her voice but felt too helpless to shake it. She felt sick and angry about everything that had happened and that she had done and she wanted it all to end.

"Pidge Pidgey Ot Ot Pidge Otto!" Paige said, wrapping her dripping wings around Alaska. Alaska smiled softly at this and rearranged her arms to hug her first Pokemon back, fresh but silent tears falling from her eyes as she slid down against the cold stone walls. I did this all for you, didn't I? She thought to herself. I wanted to prove that you and I could take on the world together, that you didn't need a Starter to be winners. If it wasn't for Indigo Dreams and that dumb blonde tart, would we even be here? We may have made it on a journey eventually, but would we have captured Frances or Nadia, or met Sandy. If I had waited, would my parents be in a better place? Would my father have found a job? Would Edward and Emily have finished school, or would Freddie have started? Everything would have been different if this show had not started… I never would have met Darwin…

"I have to tell them," Alaska whispered aloud, and before Paige even heard her properly, two Great Balls were rolling across the concrete tiles. The blue light was so bright that Alaska had to shut her eyes to avoid blinding herself in the storm-caused darkness, but when she opened them again, Frances and Nadia awaited her, Paige fluttering down to greet them. They stood in the order they had been captured, and Alaska felt teary again as she looked across them all: Paige, so proud and loyal, Frances, who was conquering her fears and letting her strength shine through, and Nadia, already so fierce and strong. They all looked at her, and Alaska watched them, staring between Paige and Frances, knowing Darwin should be there… but there was no turning back from that…

"I let Darwin go," she whispered, trying to control herself for her Pokemon. "He… he hit me today, only a few hours after he tried to kill Alexis' Meganium and shortly after Darwin tried to hurt Sandy's Butterfree." Frances looked shocked, clutching her claws to her mouth, while Nadia tried to look unfazed, but her eyes gave it away. "I-I-I-I didn't w-want to, but… Paige, you saw what happened better than I did… there was no way I could keep him… I can't control him, he doesn't listen to me… I can't control anything these days!" The tears fell again, and Alaska screeched in rage, banging her fists on the ground. She had been reduced to a giant, blubbery mess, and Alaska hated herself for it, but she couldn't even control her own body and let the tears fall. "I should never have put any of you in this situation! I'm sorry… this is all my fault!"

"Para Para Sect Para!" Frances said, and she scuttled forwards, wrapping her claws around Alaska's left leg and giving it a comforting squeeze. Paige nodded in approval and hopped over, hugging Alaska around the waist. Nadia took the right leg, nuzzling her head against the cold, damp jeans, but Alaska could feel the warmth coming through. She laughed through the blood and tears and pulled the three closer.

"At least I have you three," she whispered, and fell silent, sitting there with her arms around her Pokemon, listening to the rain and wondering what she was going to do next.

"You may have them now, but what about in the future?" A voice hissed through the storm, and Alaska seized up. The voice was all too familiar, having heard it echoing inside the Underground Path on her way to this storm struck city, but Alaska looked around and she could find no sign of this shadowed man that had stalked her for this entire journey.

"Where are you? Show yourself!" Alaska screamed, jumping to her feet and spinning around, her Pokemon spreading out to protect her, but the man did not come forwards. Fear settled inside her, Alaska's thought hissing dark ideas into her head: could she trust this man… could she trust anyone? "Fine… then tell me what happened to Trevor?"

"I am not sure what happened to your policing friend," the man replied in his deep, nearly robotic voice. "I am sure he is still alive. I survived, so should he… though I have developed a knack for surviving much worse than that." Alaska stored this information away, hoping it would help her crack who this person was, but her head was beginning to throb again and she clutched it in agony. "Headache? I am not surprised. I saw the way your Primeape hit you… or is this pain from something else? Guilt, perhaps? Or struggling to make sense of this path you've chosen?"

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" Alaska screamed, clutching her head as it throbbed worse than ever. Was this man doing something to her mind? Alaska tried to think, but all she could hear was the sound Darwin had made when he had jumped for Meganium, combined with gunshots, explosions and a silky smooth voice; the dead will rise before your battle is over. "What do you want with me?" Alaska asked, struggling to control the tears that she didn't want.

"I told you last time we met that I was going to give you a choice very soon, and now I am here to give it to you," the shadowy figure replied. "As you must have worked out by now, the indecision is destroying you, your Pokemon and those around you. It is time you decided on the path to go on Alaska: you either carry on being made a puppet by these rich fools that care less for your safety and more for claiming your glory, or you can continue with your journey and become an excellent trainer before being forced into something that will likely kill you."

"I don't know what I want to do!" Alaska replied, barely able to control her emotions, swinging somewhere between rage and depression, 'death' now screaming at the back of her thoughts. "I want to continue with my journey, I want to train my team, I want to be the best, but… but I have become too caught up in all of this. Can I really throw this all away? What if Gideon gets too powerful, or whoever keeps sending robots after me reveals themselves, and what if –" but Alaska never finished her sentence, as from out of nowhere a hand appeared, and suddenly she was stumbling to the side, clutching her cheek where it had been slapped, pain spreading through her face and setting her nose bleeding again.

"NIDORAN RAN RAN!" Nadia hissed, and fired Poison Stings into the darkness, but suddenly they were alone again. Alaska blinked stars out of her vision and winced at the pain, which was stronger than she had anticipated, and looked angrily for her assailant.

"I do have a knife in my bag!" Alaska hissed. "It may be used for cutting brownies, but it is still a knife, and I will cut you if you do that again!"

"Now you listen to me," the shadowed man said from nowhere, suddenly angry, though likely not from her knife jibe, "we are running out of time. Gideon has Charlotte's spell book now, but he needs a few more items and has to wait for the right moment before he can ensure he has a chance of victory. You have the time you need to continue battling and to continue training, and when you have evolved all your Pokemon or gotten a full time or whatever you need to do to be the best, that should be in time for Gideon to be ready. I don't want you to fight him, I know the cost of going against people like him, but Gideon seems to have chosen you as a target, and he will make sure you are there for his big finale whether you want to or not, so it is better that you ready yourself rather than go against him unprepared." Alaska paused at this, letting his words rush over him, deafening the manic thoughts in her mind. Could she really pull that off… could she train and be ready in time for this battle? She looked down at her team and saw they were all listening as well, only Paige looking up at her with fierceness in her eyes.

"The Kanto Elites, as you so lovingly called them on your blog, they won't like this, they want you to defeat him for them," he continued. "Red has sent his Suicune and Zapdos after you to ensure you are kept safe, but they are also watching you're every movement, so be careful of them and what they may relay back to HQ. But it is more important that you get a grip of yourself. I watched you today since your loss… in fact, since your friend was shot, and you have been a mess. Think clearly; don't fret about all this blue lightning and who the robots belong to or anything. You and Sandy need to be a strong, united team if you have any hope of winning this war, and you need her by your side to keep you sane."

I am in major need of some sanity, Alaska thought, but her mind was beginning to calm down. The prophecies and screaming and fear were passing through her system, and only the shadowed man's words remained, repeating themselves over and over again, drumming themselves deep into her brain, and Alaska was beginning to feel… dare she say… normal.

"Clean yourself up, train your remaining Pokemon, and make sure you defeat Alexis before the week is up to put Evelyn in her place," the man said. "And, whatever you do, do not let yourself be impaired by meeting the Indigo Dreams cast again. You cause too much trouble when you meet them, and I don't trust anyone involved with that show, especially not Amanda or Buzz."

"Buzz?" Alaska asked, instantly confused, but she shot the question down, knowing it would do her no good to dwell on this. She looked around once again, hoping for a sign of the man, but he was still just as invisible as he had been all this time. "Thank you… thank you for all of this," she said to thin air, her words blown away by the wind, a calm sensation spreading throughout her body. "I needed this… I hope I can stick to what you told me… I don't want to die."

"Trust me, death is not as bad as it seems," the man replied, and for the first time, his voice sounded soft… it sounded human. Alaska turned towards it, and she saw a silhouette standing by the table in the centre of this courtyard. She felt his eyes staring back at her as the wind tugged at his long black cloak, and Alaska shivered as his gaze turned away from her, the man looking across at Celadon. "It would be a pity if Kanto fell… she is so beautiful when she is not being destroyed. Good luck, Alaska Acevedo… we will all be watching you." He began to walk towards the edge, and Alaska felt sad to see him go. Suddenly, a question fell into her mind, one of the nagging thoughts that had been there all day, and she rushed out into the rain once more.

"Wait!" She cried, and the man stopped. Alaska ran up to him, stopping a metre away but close enough to see the leather texture of his jacket and the grim hat that adorned his face. "I would never have met Gideon if I had not followed a shadowed figure to the museum. I always thought it had been Gideon I had followed… but he would not have been so obvious, would he?" Silence fell except for the thundering rain, and Alaska froze as the man turned towards her, his face hidden in shadow, but she could see lips through the darkness, and could see his left hand coming towards her.

"Why do you think I am doing all of this?" He whispered back, mournful and painfully, and his hand touched her face. Alaska shut her eyes at the feeling of cold, wet leather brushing her cheek, a shudder spreading throughout her body. Suddenly, there was a white hot flash that burnt through her eyes, and when Alaska opened them, her saviour was gone, disappearing like a flash of lightning…

"Alaska, are you out here? ALASKA!" Alaska had become lost in staring out at Celadon, the shadowed man's words repeating themselves within her mind, but she turned at the cry of her name and the sound of glass breaking. She saw Sandy, the nervous servant girl from this morning and the trio of Eevee all standing in the doorway, all looking curious and fearful. Alaska broke into a smile at the sight of Sandy, and quickly rushed out of the rain towards her friend, throwing her arms around her and pulling her close. "Don't you ever think of running away again!" Sandy cried tearfully. "I was so worried! Daisy and Morimoto are still out there looking for you; I am going to have to call them… but your so wet, you need dry clothes, immediately!" Sandy broke away and Alaska saw her eyes were glistening. Guilt rose up once again, but Alaska managed to control herself, focussing her mind on what the man had said.

"Don't cry," she said, smiling back at Sandy. "I am safe, and for once, I believe I am going to be pretty sane for a while. Go call them; we can talk in a minute." Sandy nodded, struggling to hold back her tears, and Alaska wondered if there were from joy or the stress she had displayed before. The blonde pushed past the girl, and was followed by the three Eevee. Alaska and her team were left alone with the servant girl, a hush falling once more. Her big green eyes kept flicking between Alaska and the ground, and she was nervously walking back towards the glass doors as if she wanted to get away, and Alaska could tell from the rest of her stance, and how she had acted this morning, it was not because of the rain.

"Why are you scared of me?" Alaska asked suddenly as she wiped more blood away from her upper lip, suddenly realising how dizzy she felt. The girl looked up, her eyes widening even further like a Stantler in headlights but Alaska wanted an answer before she could properly move on . "Did I do something wrong when I was your patient or whatever, is that it?" The girl seemed frozen, only annoying Alaska, but there was nothing to be done. "Fine then, be that way! Come on girls, let's get out of this awful –"

"I heard about the things you've done," the girl said suddenly, talking rapidly. "They – the Athlews, and your friends – they were talking about how you had a part to play in the tunnel collapsing, and with that scientist guy, and destroying the generators and…" but at this, the girl fell silent again, and Alaska saw she was shaking in fear. Am I really that intimidating? Alaska thought, feeling sick all over again, and she struggled to dwell feelings of guilt.

"I am sorry that you heard that stuff, but trust me, I am not a bad person," she replied, trying to smile in a kind way. "Ask my Pokemon if you don't believe me! I have just been put into a situation that I can't seem to get out of, but for the time being, I am putting all of that on hold." The girl nodded, still looking frightened, though Alaska hoped her message had gotten through. She signalled for her Pokemon to move again, and the girl stepped aside, holding onto the door handle to let them through.

"What's your name, by the way?" Alaska asked, hoping to make a connection on some level with the girl.

"Oh… it's Amelia," she replied timidly. Alaska smiled at their similar names and went to move on, but a tiny squeak turned her back around. "If I was you," Amelia said, looking down at her shoes, "I would force the scientist into doing things on my rules. Choose the field to fight him on rather than him always choosing it for you, and then maybe things will be less destructive… or more destructive, if you want them to be, but it might mean you will win and no one else will be scared." Alaska was taken aback by the advice, but she nodded and smiled back, letting the words sink in as they set off alarm bells in the back of her head.

"Amelia, Gabriella is calling you, she wants help with preparing for dinner," Sandy said, appearing back with her gaggle of Eevee. Amelia smiled at the two girls before rushing away, and Alaska watched her go, suddenly feeling rather satisfied, a plan forming in her mind. "My god, this weather is just getting worse!" Sandy said, looking through the open door as the wind and rain continued to howl. "I thought this was meant to be a sunny city."

"Don't you worry Sandy, I can bring the sunshine. I know exactly how to make things bright again…" Alaska said, unable to stop the beam crossing her face. Sandy looked confused, but Alaska simply reached across and pulled the door shut, silencing the storm and trapping it outside. Alaska watched the fat drops of rain swirling around in the wind, examining all the chaos being created as some sort of fruit tree struggled to stay upright, and a smile crossed her face. My storm has passed, Alaska thought, and she turned away to face Sandy, and together with all the Pokemon, they walked down the hallway, none of them looking back at the madness Alaska had left outside.

The series will move on a bit from here. I hope to have less of Alaska worrying about everything and having mental breakdowns and go back towards the humour of the earlier chapters and restrain the drama a bit. There will be still be discussions about these things, but they will probably be more spoken between Alaska, Sandy and possible others, along with more discussions about other things that I have meant to write about for ages. So know that Alaska will be back on track from here on out, starting with her bringing back the sunshine ;)