"You made the mess, you clean it up!"

"But that's not fair! We all drank!"

"Yeah? Well who's the one who got so drunk they flooded the living room!?"

Kazuma leaned against a wall, arms crossed as he scowled at a currently mopping goddess.

"You could at least give me a little help! I didn't know what I was doing!"

"That's why they say drink responsibly, but you wouldn't know responsibility if it hit you in the face!"

"What!? I was responsible for the lives of all young souls from Japan! You call that not having responsibility!?"

"Pshhh you sure did a great job, insulting and berating one of those souls to the point they dragged your ass down with them!"

Fed up, Aqua began chasing Kazuma around the room with her wet mop.

"It is far too early for them to be going at it like this."

"Kazuma has a point though, she did do this."

Megumin, still in pajamas, pointed down at the large puddles that dotted their once clean floors.

"Will you stop chasing me! You touch me with that nasty mop and I'm soaking you in blood!"

"EWW! Don't tell me you developed a new fetish you pervy neet!"

"Yeah right! The only one here with a blood fetish has gotta be Darkness."

The crusader in question turned red and opened her mouth to counter before being cut off by the ringing of the guild hall's bells.

"DESTROYER ALERT! DESTROYER ALERT! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! THE MOBILE FORTRESS DESTROYER IS APPROACHING!"

"Oh no…"

"Kazuma, forget cleaning these floors! We have to gather our things and get out of here!"

"Now hold on, we just got this place. Like hell am I going to let some oversized toy take that away!"

"I agree with Kazuma, allow me to equip my armor and I'll meet you at the guild hall."

Kazuma and Darkness shared a nod before he turned to the youngest among them.

"Come on, I'll need you with me too you know. Get dressed and grab your staff. We're gonna stop that thing if its the last thing we do."


"You adventurers are the last hope this city has. Thank you for putting your lives on the line."

The room wasn't as grim as it should have been, all things considered. Those present still maintained the slimmer of faith that the party that has proved themselves again and again would come through for them once more.

"My intel tells me that the destroyer approaches from the northwest. Sadly, our town is right in its path, there's no way to avoid what comes, we have maybe an hour at best."

'I know I was told before that the destroyer was a technological construct, but now that I get a good look at it, this is straight up just a robot spider! Who built this monstrosity!?'

"Um, can't we ask the creators of the destroyer for a way to stop it?" asked one female mage.

"Not possible I'm afraid. When the destroyer was activated, its makers were the first to be annihilated."

'Talk about shitty game balance'

"There's no reason to be scared, Kazuma and his party is here!"

"Yeah, they defeated Verdia and the Winter Shogun!"

'You mean I defeated them thank you very much'

"If only Kiyouya was here then they could team up!"

"Well that settles it, how about it Kazuma? Got any bright ideas?" Asked Chris.

Remember what I told you boy

"...we can stop it."

The guild lit up in smiles.

"Really!? Your party can defeat it!?" Asked Luna desperately, she had faith in their proven abilities, but it was hard not to be fearful given the context.

"Aqua. You can break its barrier can't you?"

"Well, I don't know, I can give it a shot but…"

"You'll do it, I know you can. Once the barrier is down, leave the rest to Megumin and I."

"Huh? Me?"

"That's right, your explosion isn't the same as it was before remember? We'll crush that tin can together!"

"Alright! If anyone could blow that thing up it'd be the crazy girl!"

"Ol' nutjob will leave that poor destroyer in pieces!"

"How about I start with blowing up this guild instead!? If you're gonna call me by anything it better be my name!"

From behind the crowd of now shying adventurers, pushed a familiar shopkeeper. Apologizing all the way to the front.

"Excuse me, sorry! I came to help in any way I can, I am a licensed adventurer after all."

"Alright the broke shopkeep is here!"

'Good, I'm sure we can use her too'

"So to break it down, Aqua you gotta break that barrier. Megumin and I will dismantle it from there. Wiz you're on extra firepower duty in case we need some 'oomph'. Everyone else on reserves in case it starts spewing out minions or something."

'There's ALWAYS minions these things command right?'

"Planning is done then! Let the emergency quest to stop the mobile destroyer, begin!"


As the defense building crew began erecting stone and wood barriers to supplement the front gate in case of debris, Kazuma and company took their places on top of the city walls, mentally readying themselves for what was to come.

"Hey Aqua, where's Darkness?"

"She's down there!"

"That idiot, she's gonna get herself killed!"

"Forget that, are you guys good over there!?"

He had his nerves under control given the situation, deciding to let go and just trust that his powers would be enough. His crimson demon partner on the other hand…

"Megumin, don't be so stressed out."

She didn't respond, and only continued to mumble to herself as the distant sounds of metallic stomping grew louder.

Kazuma sighed, then removed her hat and placed a hand on her head, getting her to freeze in place.

"Hey, look at me."

"Mm."

"Just like yesterday, I'm not going to let anything hurt you okay? We're gonna do it together. Trust in me like I'm going to trust in you, you're a crimson demon after all right!?"

"Y-yeah, you're right!"

"Have you not been levelling up your explosion for months now!?"

"I have!"

"So join me in my quest of oblivion, and aid me in putting this beast to rest!"

Why are you posing like that

'Can it, this is her language'

Megumin responded by putting her hat back on and tilting it downward with a sly grin, now mentally in control of her fear.

"This quest to oblivion, I'll gladly join you."

"It's here!" yelled out a voice from below.

From the distance, a massive rock formation was turned into a sea of pebbles with complete ease as a mechanical arachnid-like construct made its way into view. The steel whirring of each movement and the laser grid eradicating all flying creatures in range, did a great job in once again putting a great deal of doubt in the hearts of the many adventurers.

"Aqua, it's party time!"

With a sparkle, the goddess of water called down her staff, the pink bulb blooming in her hand.

"Here we go! Saaaacreeeed!"

Five gargantuan portals of yellow light appeared above her head as magic that could be felt built up.

"DiiisPEEEELLLL!"

Releasing all the pent up energy stored inside, the portals opened into five torrents of magic energy shot out as lasers. The power of each one shaking the ground of the city itself.

This…is the power of a god

'I'll say…'

As the beam collided, the barrier in all its glory became visible to the eye, slowly cracking away, but not fast enough.

"Aqua! Turn it up!"

Gritting her teeth in struggle, she let out a piercing shout as the portals widened and the beams empowered even more than before, knocking all below off their feet with the air pressure alone.

And like the sound of falling glass, the barrier shattered into millions of pieces that dissipated in the wind.

"NOWS OUR CHANCE MEGUMIN!"

The destroyer had other plans, and after a deep toned alarm, a female voice began to play over loudspeakers.

"Barrier compromised. Maximum overdrive mode initiated."

Without warning, it began to move erratically at a heightened speed. Zig zagging and preparing itself to deploy movement based countermeasures to ranged attack.

"It's moving too fast for me! It has to be restrained somehow!"

'Damn it! What now!?'

What are you prattling about?

'It's moving into overdrive, she can't get a lock on it!'

That's why you're here, you need to use your power to lift it up and rip the legs out from under it

'What!? You're insane! It's massive!'

You're a vampire lord boy, size means nothing to you! Reach out with your blood and grab that destroyer, or you and your friends will die here with this city!

'Guess I don't have a choice!'

"Megumin, get your spell ready."

As she looked at him in confusion, he extended his arms forward, and from the red glow that surrounded them, what seemed like hundred of gallons of blood flowed into the distance at shocking speed.

Good, now under, under!

Struggling to maintain control over this distance, the blood took the shape of a giant hand, its fingers gripping around the mechanical body. To everyone's opened jaws, it began to lift the spider into the air.

Now tear them off!

Diverting some of the flow to each leg, Kazuma could have felt his head get light. He's never called upon this much power outside of Vlad's impalement. And that had him down and out instantly.

With the closing of his fist, the blood built up around each limb detonated in immense pressure, letting gravity do the rest as each leg fell with a harsh sound to the dirt below.

Kazuma didn't need to say a single word, as he retracted his blood and it slowly flowed back into him, Megumin was already halfway through her incantation.

"-appear now as as intangible distortion! EXploooOO-SHUUN!"

Similar to Aqua's, the multi layered rings of magic that seemed to drain the sky of light erupted downward in a glowing bolt that exploded in a fury of rubble, soot, and wind. What was left in its wake, was a blackened metallic corpse.

Kazuma caught the bombing expert as she fell, and propped her up against the stone balcony railing.

"You did good Megumin. We couldn't have done it without you."

"You got that right…"

The adventurers below began to revel in their victory, cheers rung out through their ranks, some fell onto their butts in relief.

"Now that that's done with, let's all hit the bar!" cried out Aqua.

"Oh no, what are those idiots doing!? They're gonna trigger a-"

Like before, the same alarm sound deafened all hopes and dreams, and the voice began to speak again.

"Critical damage detected. Crewmates evacuate. Self destruct engaged. Self destruct engaged."

"Damn it! We gotta get out of here!"

Not so fast boy. Reach out with your senses

'Oh damn it what now. But I guess i'll try…'

Deep into its center

As he closed his eyes and attempted to feel traces of magic in the air, he began to realize what was happening.

'That's! It's the core, I feel it building up'

The same thing powering that machine, has been set to implode. It can be removed and sealed, however I am unsure if you would survive the ordeal

'Unsure!?'

The pocket dimension allows you to seal away inanimate objects, magical or not. However it is still connected to you on a magical level. If something inside were to explode, the release of energy could kill you. It is risky, however at this point there may not be another way

"Kazuma?"

"Stay here, I'm going to stop it."

"Hey, wait for me guys!"

"Wiz! You still have all your mana right?"

"Sure do!"

"The thing causing the self destruct, its the core inside the destroyer! If we can get rid of it somehow…"

"I know the teleport spell! I should be able to send it away from here!"

"What!? That's perfect!"

'That's a relief, I didn't feel like playing a game of luck with my life'

"In that case, hold on to me tight."

"Huh? Like this?" Wiz grabbed onto Kazuma from behind, wrapping her arms around his waist as tight as she could.

"H-hey! Aren't I coming along?" Megumin called out.

"Sorry Megumin, you're safer here, you already played your part anyways so just sit there and rest easy! We got this!"

"Um, why do I need to hold onto you like this?"

"Because I've only done this once. Now vampire powers don't fail me now!" With the anxious lich behind him, Kazuma leapt off the castle walls, before his flowing crimson attached to his back, forming two massive wings that allowed the two to gently glide their way to the destroyer's back.

"Hold up, is Darkness climbing the damn thing down there!?"

"It sure does appear that way."

When they landed on top, Kazuma didn't wait to begin breaking his way through its outer walls and into the inner halls.

'This is a lot more intricate than I thought!'

"Wiz, I feel it from this direction!"

After punching a gaping hole in the final doorway, what could only be assumed to be the command center lay before them. It was a rather dinky room with all manner of technological doodads and devices strewn across the room. In the back was what appeared like a throne with a corpse still in its seat.

"That must have been the pilot."

Wiz said a small prayer in her head, only imagining the guilt and horror faced by the creator of such a tragic accident.

"Hey, Kazuma, this looks like it could have been a journal of his."

Blowing off the dust of an old book laying aside the skeletons chair, Kazuma began to recount some events detailed within. Including his rather nonchalant reactions to building such a thing, and even the complete destruction of the kingdom he worked for as well as his oversight in not building an off switch.

"Ugh what an idiot!"

"There it is, the coronatite!"

"It looks kinda like my Red Sun attack! Alright Wiz, do your thing…uh Wiz? You good?"

"Well, yes. But with the amount of time I have, it's not like I can teleport it to a place my choosing, it would be random! What if it is sent to another city?"

Kazuma took her hands and flashed her his trademark smile.

"Don't worry about that. I have like, top tier luck! That's gotta count for something. Trust me, this isn't gonna have any repercussions at all."

"Well, if you say so. I trust you Kazuma!"


"Yo, Darkness, it's over."

When Kazuma and Wiz climbed down from the hole he had made, Darkness stood as still as a statue, surveying the surrounding damage.

"No. It isn't. I can smell danger from any distance, and it lurks here just as strong as ever."

'A three phase boss?'

"Wha! What's going on!?"

Right under their noses, the normally dark steel outer shell of the destroyer began to glow red hot. All holes and openings made started to exhale with hot steam, even the eye lenses cracked open with the immense pressure of the heat.

"Oh no! The built up heat of the destroyer is going to turn it into a fire bomb! The resulting explosion will burn the town to a crisp!"

"Can't you blow it up!?"

"I used all my mana for the teleportation!"

'What do we do now?'

"Hey Kazuma! Darkness! The adventurers are all evacuating!" Aqua called out, carrying Megumin on her back.

"That's it! Wiz, you never did get to teach me a move that one day!"

'Did I even get to ask?'

"Huh? You want to learn a skill now?"

"That's right. You're a lich right? Which means you can absorb mana."

"I see where this is going."

"Oh Darkness~ let me borrow you for a second!"


"Alright, I think I got it down. Megumin, I need you."

"Oh now you need me?"

"Yes I do!"

"Hmph, you got a lot of nerve asking for my help when you left me behind in the first place!"

"Yeah wellthatscauseIdidn'tthinki'dneeditbeforecanwehurrythisuuuuppp!?"

"Well…"

"We don't have time for this Megumin!...Please, give me your hand."

Exhaling and deciding to save the pouting for later, Megumin took hold of Kazuma's hand in a tight grip. He held onto Darkness' shoulder with his other hand, and with the activation of his new ability-

"AAGh-" Darkness bit down and grit her teeth, why did it hurt this much? What if it hurt more?

"Hohohohooo, yeah I can feel it coming back to me. Your mana is strong Darkness."

"How unsightly, being used as little more than an energy bank, fated to be drained of everything I have for your sake Kazuma!"

"Don't talk like that! You good Megumin? I don't wanna leave Darkness in a broken state or anything."

"I wouldn't mind that!"

"You pipe down!"

"Juuust a bit to top up…ugh...yeah that's good there."

'Why are you moaning!?'

"Well, take it away!"

"You got it. Oh darkness shrouded in light. Frenzied blaze clad in night. When it comes to explosion magic, i shall not be outdone by anyone! Mine will reign supreme in this world! Here it goes! My ultimate destruction spell! EXplooOOOSHUUUN!"

*KKKHHHHHBOOOOOOOOOOOOM*


'And that was our battle with the destroyer. I got to admit, I didn't think I'd have it in me to lift that bastard up! How cool is that!? It seems like we all got to shine in our own ways too, I gotta admit, with me to pick up the slack, my party isn't half bad. Although I'm getting the feeling that this isn't going to end well'

Kazuma entered the guild hall, and was given a relatively cold welcome wagon, the glares of an official from the capital, and an escort of knights.

'She doesn't look too happy, Luna and the others look worried'

Perhaps our luck has run out, and they have come to hunt you for what you are

"You are Kazuma Satou correct?"

"That's right."

"I represent the capital, you are accused of treason against the kingdom. I'm here to place you under arrest."

'...This is starting to get tiring. I've done nothing but help people since day freaking one!'

"You did order a mass of coronatite to be teleported did you not?"

'Oh…that's what this is about'

"It completely destroyed Lord Alderp's entire estate."

'Damn it all!'

"Oh my, that's horrible."

"Are we uh, still getting the reward?"

"Kazuma…"

"Luckily he wasn't there, and so no one was killed. But one thing is certain, you are either a terrorist, or in league with demonic forces. I don't see how you've managed to remain above suspicion, vampire."

'Why do I keep getting flack for being a vampire when Wiz is a lich!? Don't tell me these ass clowns don't know!?'

Megumin jumped in front of Kazuma and held an arm up in defense.

"Now hold on! If it wasn't for him this town would have been destroyed multiple times over! The former general Verdia, the winter shogun, the incident with the one-hit-kill bear, and now the mobile destroyer! He's done nothing but fight for the people of this town and you want to imprison him?"

"Megumin you amazing girl!"

"That's right, sure he has his perverted moments, like how he looks over at us in lecherous ways throughout the day, but he's become a respected member of this city!"

I see no reason why you shouldn't simply destroy them where they stand. A vampire lord has nothing to fear from the kingdoms forces

'I'm not a murderer! And even if these jackasses deserve to be taught a lesson, fighting wouldn't solve this…but I think I know what will'

Kazuma tuned out the cries for justice in the guild, and he began to smile deviously, oh this was gonna be hilarious!

"As you should know, the crime of sedition applies to anyone in league with the vampire. Unless you wish to join him in his cell, you better watch your tongue."

Aqua immediately scooted herself off to the side, breaking down into a monologue about how she could have stopped him if she were there.

"Oh you absolute bitch!"

Megumin looked off to the side and hesitated greatly. The fear of being imprisoned, or worse, wracked her to the core, but then she began to think of what she said.

'It's not so bad avoiding the sun, cause if you ever want to go out at night, you know, I-i'll be there too if you want'

The thought of saying something like that and going back on it wracked her worse. And so with slightly shaky hands, she stood steadfast at his side, not saying a word, but there nonetheless.

"Wait, I uh, I gave the order. Yes! It was me! I did it! Take me to jail and subject me to all your torture!"

"No Darkness. Get back here." Kazuma said, holding her back by her shoulder.

"Huh?"

"They're right, I did it. I'm just going to have to prove my innocence somehow."

"Kazuma no, don't." Megumin tugged at his sleeve.

"Trust me, okay? I got this under control. I'll be back soon."

"So is the accused ready to come with us?"

"That's right. I'll come along peacefully."

"Place him under arrest!"


"And this is where you stay until the day of your interrogation, got it vampire?" mocked the cell guard.

"Yeah. I got it."

"It's amazing how they're even giving you a trial. Vampires are usually killed on sight. You must have had a grand time pretending to be a goodie two shoes huh?"

Kazuma didn't dignify him with a response, instead focusing on his cell. It was definitely made personal for him that's for sure. The walls were lined with garlic, the cell bars had a silver glean, and holy symbols of Eris and other gods placed randomly.

'This is pretty insulting. It would take me three seconds to break out of this'

Garlic…

'Wait a minute, there's no blood here. Either they're complete idiots or they're smarter than I thought'

By starving you into a feral state, they would have cause to skip the proceedings and kill you on the grounds of you being a monster

'Yeah well, good thing it doesn't have to come to that. Let's get this show on the road cause my bed is calling my name!'