It took a while for 032 to get back, much longer than he had expected since 032 had said he was going to go and get 006. After 032 had left, it hadn't taken long for the doctor to go in and check on him. The mental exhaustion from that little episode was still weighing down on him, and while he wasn't excited to let her examine him, he also knew that just like the medics, you don't piss off the doctor.
After she had left, 001 was left alone in his room for quite some time. Which he didn't mind, all it did was give him time to recover from whatever the fuck happened with the voices and time to think. Time to think about what 032 had told him about his defection from the camp, along with the little information he had found out about himself.
Honestly, he still found it hard to believe that he had relatives.
For the longest time, it was just him. He didn't even have a name to claim as his own, forget any family members. Being alone didn't bother him that much: he had gotten used to that long ago and if anything, it just forced him to be even more independent. What did bother him, was the fact that 032 told him he had a family. A family that he couldn't remember a single thing about. Not a name, not a position, not an appearance. Absolutely nothing came to mind when he tried to think about the family he apparently had.
The more he thought about it, the more frustrated he got.
001 went in circles for a while, looping 032's words in his head, and then getting annoyed at his lack of remembrance. By the time 006 came along, he no longer felt like he was going to pass out if he stood up.
001 looked up at 006 from his position on the bed, and while he didn't know what to expect, seeing 006 standing at the doorway with a jacket and a six-pack of something with an expectant look on his face did nothing to clear up what was going on. If anything, it just made him more confused because how the actual fuck was that related to the current situation?
Either he didn't notice his confused look, or he just didn't care, but 006 gave him a small smile, "Come on," 006 had a relaxed posture, his shoulders were slumped down, his weight shifted to his back leg as he held up the bottles-something called soju- and motioned for him to come, "Lets go talk somewhere else." Warily, 001 looked at 006 up and down, but just like 032, 006 wasn't wearing any of his combat gear. He was wearing clothes that could easily hide a weapon, but it was obvious that 006 wasn't dressed for a combat situation.
Still, he didn't let his guard down as he slipped on his shoes and motioned for 006 to take the lead. He felt naked without his weapons, (he still had no idea where those were) but he knew that if 006 tried something, he would be able to take care of himself.
Besides, he trusted 006. He knew that 006 wouldn't hurt him without reason. Sure, 006 was an asshole, but he wasn't a cruel person that would hurt people needlessly.
006 smiled before stepping out of the way, allowing 001 to walk out of the room first. The men in the suits didn't give them a single glance, and while that showed that they weren't concerned with his presence, it didn't mean that he relaxed in the slightest. For all he knew, they were ordered to detain him the moment he went against their employer's wishes (Which was another point because he still had no idea who had placed the security detail on him). If it wasn't for 006 exchanging a single nod with one of the men, he would have thought that 006, 032, and the men were operating separately. Which still wasn't that comforting.
Honestly, there was nothing about everything that could make him feel better, not until he found out what the hell was going on with everything. That included his injuries, the security detail, the people that had been by his bedside, and virtually anything else that left him out of the loop.
001 ran his eyes over the guards, taking note of their appearance and characteristics so he could identify them later on if anything came up. To their credit, the men ignored his glances in favor of staring forward, the very epitome of professionalism.
The back of his neck prickled, and without a second thought, he whipped his head around to see who was staring at him. 001 tensed up as he did so, subconsciously preparing for confrontation as no one had ever stared at him with good intentions. They most likely wanted something from him because they wouldn't have noticed him otherwise.
001 glared at the girl and boy that were staring at him from the end of the hall, silently conveying that they needed to leave him the fuck alone .
They both flinched, the both of them ducking their heads as if he had thrown something at him. He found himself tensing up as more people walked around the corner. A boy and girl with black hair, a boy with unnatural-looking red hair, a man in some military uniform, another boy with a buzzcut, and an elderly old man.
Although 001 knew that they couldn't do anything to him, that didn't mean that he liked being stared at like he was some type of bull at an auction. All of them had their attention focused purely and solely on him. All of them were staring at him with saddened looks as if he had done something to garner their worry.
He hated the way they were all looking at him with pity.
If he didn't accept pity from his teammates, there was no way in hell he was going to accept it from a group of strangers. The few times he got pity from someone he knew, from people who he trained with, they ended up stabbing him in the back and kicking him when he was down.
So, he didn't need it. He didn't need or want their pity.
032 walked around the corner with a curious look on his face, he looked around, leaning forward to see the people's faces. He tilted his head curiously when he saw their faces, but when he looked forward and made eye contact with him, his face twisted in annoyance.
"Hey, asshat," 032 said boldly, looking thoroughly done with whatever was going on as his voice echoed through the hallway. "Stop looking like someone pissed in your canteen. Lighten the fuck up." The people around 032 gave him nervous looks, a few of them even looking appalled at the words.
That just pissed him off even more. The fact that the strangers were apparently a bunch of pansies combined with 032 being an asshat, didn't help at all.
His temper was short, and that was more than enough cause for him to flip off the little shit. "Fuck off if you're not going to say anything useful." The group of strangers either flinched, or gasped at his actions, and honestly, he found that to be unnecessary. "Who the fuck are they anyway?" 001 jerked his head towards the strangers, rudely referring to them. "What do they want?" He didn't bother trying to keep his tone even as he said that. He was tired, annoyed, and the fact that he still didn't know everything about this situation, only pissed him off even more.
There was a sigh from behind him, "Hey, relax man." 006 walked around and stood in between to block his view of the group. 006's tone was drastically different: while 001 had kept his tone aggressive and confrontational, 006's tone was relaxed, as if he was trying to be soothing. "They won't hurt you. Just come with me and I'll explain everything."
001 glanced over at the group of strangers and 032 over 006's shoulder and eyed them. Save for the soldier, 001 knew that he wouldn't have any trouble with any of them should they try something. 032 was definitely bigger than he remembered, but he knew that 032 also had no reason to try anything.
Besides, if 006 and 032 wanted to hurt him, they would have never let him wake up in the first place.
Glancing at the group one more time, he nodded his head. "Fine." He jerked his head to the side, motioning for 006 to take the lead again, "You better explain everything ." 001 emphasized the word, stressing the fact that he still didn't have a solid grasp of what the fuck was going on.
006 huffed as he took lead again, leading him to a door at the opposite end of the hall. "I will I will," 006 drawled out, holding open the door to the stairway as he waited for 001 to pass through. "Just relax for now, you're scaring the shit out of them."
001 damn near rolled his eyes as 006 led him up multiple flights of stairs. "As long as they leave me alone, I don't give a fuck."
And he truly didn't. If there was one thing he had learned from the camp, that was how to mind his own fucking business. As long as they stayed in their lane, and left him alone, he wouldn't care even if they went streaking through the hallways. All they had to do was leave him alone, and everything would be peaceful.
006 muttered something under his breath, probably a curse, but he didn't have the time, nor patience to find out what the blond said. He needed answers.
It was silent as they went up the stairs, and while he raised his eyebrow at the way 006 was opening the roof access door, he didn't question it. For all he knew, it was going to be the only place where they could get some privacy from both people and technology.
Though 001 did curse mentally when 006 opened the door because fucking shit was it cold. The biting wind stole all of the warmth from his body within seconds, and although 006 picked a bench that was rather protected from the wind. It didn't change the fact that it was fucking cold.
He almost jumped when something was thrown at his face, "Here," pulling the cloth off his face, he was pleasantly surprised to see that it was a thick, high-quality leather jacket. When 001 looked up, he was barely able to see 006 in the dark as he set down the six-pack," Put it on. I know you hate the cold." Without a single care in the world, 006 made himself comfortable on the bench, bringing up one of his legs to rest his chin on his knee.
And how did he know that?
If there was anything he kept to himself, it was his weaknesses and his personal opinion. He had never told 006 that he hated the cold, it was just something that he had kept to himself. It was a habit, some of the people at the camp tried to take advantage of him simply because he was younger than almost everyone and he couldn't afford to give them another weakness they could exploit.
Still, his suspicion didn't mean that he was just going to forget about his hatred of the cold. And based on the way he could feel his hands warming up just from holding the jacket, it was going to do a wonderful job at keeping him warm.
So he put it on, and while there was a familiar scent on the jacket itself (it was very familiar and there was something about it that made his shoulders feel lighter), the soft texture of the lining was almost a foreign feeling on his skin. But it was warm, so he was going to overlook the foreign texture and familiar scent in favor of focusing on the conversation.
After zipping up the jacket, and bringing up his shoulders to duck his face into the collar, 001 sat down next to 006. He eyed 006, watching the way he lit a cigarette, and opened a bottle of the soju. It wasn't until 006 took a couple of gulps from the bottle that he truly relaxed.
006 was many things, but he was not an idiot. And if 006 felt safe enough to drink alcohol, and smoke a cigarette, he knew that there was nothing to worry about. 006 was one to smoke on the job, but he definitely wasn't one to drink in an unsafe or questionable situation.
Accepting the offered drink and smoke, 001 opened his bottle and heaved out a sigh as he took a sip of the contents. Pleasantly surprised at the taste and quality, he took a bigger gulp before he lit his own cigarette. 001 let out another sigh as he breathed out the smoke, letting the tension leave his body because while he still didn't completely understand what was going on, at the very least he knew that he was safe.
For a few minutes, that was all the two of them did. Relax in between sips and puffs of smoke. It felt like it had been ages since he was able to relax with 006 like this. Since they were able to sit quietly together, in that comfortable silence as they processed the days or their life events.
It probably has.
"So," 006 said casually, tapping on the pack until another cigarette came out, "032 already explained everything to you right? What do you want to know?" There was a lot that he wanted to know.
"What happened?" 001 took another sip before glancing over at 006, who was in the middle of taking a drag from his newly lit cigarette. It was dark out there, and the orange ember from the cigarette illuminated his face just the slightest bit. "032 said that we deserted the camp, but how did I get hurt?" He fingered the bandages around his head, and even through the gauze and padding, he could feel the rough texture of stitches on his temple. Meaning that someone knocked the living shit out of his head with someone and that usually meant that since someone was aiming for his head, they didn't have good intentions.
006 sighed, the orange ember moving as he put his hand down. "Mad Dog," He said simply, a slightly apologetic, but honest tone in his voice. "It's been over five years since you've left, but he's trying to kill you since you betrayed the camp." The asshole waved his hand around as if it was something to take lightly, "But from what your sister told me, you got hurt because you were trying to protect her. A bullet grazed your head, you've been asleep for the past week. And before you say anything, we took care of the men Mad Dog sent. We sent up a few trails so he probably thinks that you left the country by now."
Okay…
Okay.
That was definitely more than what 032 said. But to be fair, he wasn't exactly in the best mindset to take in more information at that time.
So Mad Dog was trying to kill him; he was not surprised by that to be honest . After Mad Dog sent men to take him out, he had gotten hurt protecting his sister and had been asleep for the past week.
Alright.
This was a decent start.
001 nodded his head slowly, processing the information further for a few seconds. 006 was quiet as he thought about it, and he was grateful that he was given a chance to process everything.
"Okay," he had more questions, but there was one at the forefront of his mind at the moment. "Who were those people?" 001 didn't have to say which people, since that group of strangers had been the only people outside of medical staff that he had encountered so far. They stared at him as if they wanted something from him, so it was obvious that they knew of him at the very least.
006 huffed out a sigh at the question. "Well," he opened a new bottle of soju, and passed another one to him before he continued, "they're your friends and family. Isak told me that you had something of an episode when he told you your name, you didn't remember anything?" He shook his head slowly, confirming that he didn't remember a single thing about them.
They were his friends and family?
That would explain why they were all staring at him.
But it didn't explain why he didn't remember anything about them. None of them looked familiar, and none of them made him feel like he should have known who they were. At that moment, all they were was a group of people staring at him with an amount of pity in their eyes that did nothing but piss him off. Especially after 032 (who he was assuming Isak to be) had told him to lighten up.
His stomach twisted, and he would be lying if he said he knew why he'd reacted like that.
"I didn't recognize any of them." His voice was quieter than he had planned for, but there was just something inside of him that made him feel saddened at the realization. At the realization that he couldn't remember a single thing about the people who should have been close to him. For some reason, it bothered him just enough that he couldn't make himself firm even if he wanted to.
006 sighed, "I see." It wasn't a good sign that even 006 sounded saddened at his lack of remembrance.
Just how close were they where even 006 knew of their importance?
The rustling of clothes brought his attention back to 006, and he found himself tilting his head in curiosity as 006 pulled out a cell phone. "Here," 006 held out the phone for him to take, and when he didn't, 006 added, "it's yours. Your sister gave it so I can give it to you." 006 flicked the phone towards him in a silent order to take it.
It's his?
Slowly, 001 took the phone but made no move to turn it on. He looked at it front and back as if he knew enough about phones to recognize the brand and model. The only thing he knew about it was that it had a few cracks in the screen, and a thick phone case, as well as that it was apparently his.
006 nudged him. "Try looking through the photos," 006 almost sounded gentle as he said that, as if he needed to be treated delicately, "maybe it'll jog some memories."
That didn't sound like a bad idea.
He turned it on, and he swallowed thickly at the mass amount of notifications he could see from the messaging and calling app alone, though he decided to ignore that for the time being. Everything about the phone was oddly familiar. Granted, 006 said it was his, but he still didn't have any memory of actually owning the phone, or using it. But yet, he was able to find the photo gallery within seconds. He opened it, and something in his chest tightened when he saw all of the pictures and videos. He didn't even have to enlarge them to tell that he was in most of them, and while he couldn't see their faces, he could see specks of red and yellow that matched the strangers he saw.
He tapped on one of the photos. 001 didn't know what he was expecting, but it still shocked him either way.
He was there in the center, surrounded by most of the kids he had seen earlier. All of them had bright smiles on their faces, the blond kid had his arm hooked around his neck, the redhead was kneeling while holding up the number two on his hand. The black-haired kid was on his other side, his hand pushing down his head, while the girl and the boy with the buzzcut were looking at something out of frame.
They all looked happy, even the distracted ones.
He looked happy.
He knew that he couldn't miss people that he didn't remember, it was nonsensical to do that. But yet, there was something about the picture that made him long for something. He couldn't help but feel like he had lost something that had once been pivotal in his life.
Grateful that 006 was looking forward, giving him some semblance of privacy, he continued swiping through the photos. Photo after photo with the same strangers in different locations. In a school, in a place surrounded by computers, a place with packaged food on the shelves, along with many others, the only thing that didn't change were the smiles. If he wasn't smiling, then it was his apparent friends who were smiling.
The more he went through the photos, the more the reality of everything started to set in. He could see him being in all sorts of places, and it was gut-wrenching to realize that he didn't remember a single thing. He didn't remember a single event that he had found special enough to document.
He kept on going through the photos, stopping at the first video that he saw. Without a second thought, he pressed play.
For a few minutes, all he could see was him and the other boys doing something with their jackets, talking amongst themselves as they did. But it wasn't until their jackets had been zipped up to each other when it started to get a little bit weird.
They were hopping. Or maybe they were dancing?
They were dancing in a circular motion, but all of a sudden, one of the boys started to freak out, and everything went to shit. He couldn't tell who was the one that started freaking out because of the hoodies, but within seconds, all of them were on the ground. It looked like he was the only one that had landed on his side rather under or on top of someone.
It took a few seconds for him to process the sound. At first he thought it was someone else, but he soon realized that it was the sound of his laughter.
Laughter.
He was laughing.
Even 006 was looking at the phone screen curiously because as far as he knew, he had never laughed so hard. He couldn't remember a single instance where he felt happy and safe enough to express his joy like that. To think that he felt safe enough to express himself so audibly damn near knocked him on his ass.
He kept on looking through the photos, and while he was starting to get used to seeing the same people throughout the photos, he still couldn't remember any of them. No names came to mind, no feelings of hatred, familiarity, love, or sadness, nothing came to mind with the photos.
The more he looked, the more hopeless he felt.
Swallowing thickly, he just turned off the phone, leaving the two of them in the dark as he took another drag from his cigarette. The nicotine somewhat soothed his nerves because at least it was something familiar.
006 sighed, his head falling to the side as he did so, "No dice huh?" That was an understatement. Instead of helping him remember something, all he could feel was a crushing sense of guilt and hopelessness.
Not trusting his voice, he shook his head. And while he knew that it was displaying weakness in itself, he would rather not talk at the moment.
"Okay," 006 said simply, "there's nothing we can do about that. Your doctor said that you were going to lose your memory, though we were hoping that it wasn't going to be that bad." 001 didn't say anything, opting for silence as he tried to quell the pain in his chest.
They kept quiet for a few more minutes, and just as he finished his second bottle of soju, 006 stood up, flicking the cigarette butt into the trash can, "Alright. " 001 slowly stood up with him, curious about what was the next move. "Well, I'll go tell them that you don't remember anything. I think we should call it a night for now."
That didn't sound like a bad idea. He felt tired and after everything that had happened, all he wanted to do was process everything for a few hours before going to sleep.
It wasn't until he was back inside the building when he realized just how cold he was. He found himself wondering how long they had been out there because now he was cold enough where the heat almost hurt as it warmed up his cold limbs.
They were silent as they went down the stairs. The only thing that could be heard was the sound of their footsteps on each step and the clinking of the empty bottles. By the time they got back to their floor, he felt marginally better. While the men were still there, 001 knew that if 006 could trust them, he could trust them (to a degree). This time around, they didn't run into anything, and after 006 left him in his room with a simple goodnight, he was left alone to process everything.
The fact that he was so emotional about everything, just showed how much he had changed over the past five (forgotten) years.
To process the fact that he had been happy a mere week ago, very happy by the looks of it, and now, all of that was gone. Every single memory that had shaped him as a person was gone, every memory that had made him happy was gone.
He didn't know what was worse: the fact that he had forgotten everything or the fact that he could see the moments in which he was happy and not have a single recollection of it.
It felt depressing just thinking about it.
In hope that something, anything, would jog his memory again, he turned on the phone and unlocked it. This time, going to the messaging app. He had over 100 missed text messages from two group chats. He didn't recognize either one, but he tapped on the one that had more messages. Scrolling to the oldest, unseen message, he started to read them.
THE Dick Muncher: Ijin was attacked at his house by armed men.
THE Dick Muncher: I'm on the way to the hospital with his sister and yeona.
THE Dick Muncher: Meet us at XXXX hospital
Asshat: Wait what
Asshat: R u serious?
Krillin But With More Hair: Seokju?
Blond bitch: What wait.
Blond bitch: Seokju?
Asshat: Holy shit
Krillin But With More Hair: I dont have a ride
Krillin But With More Hair: Is Ijin okay?
Asshat: Ill pick you up, send me your address.
Blond bitch: I need a ride too, I'll meet you at Yeongchans.
Krillin But With More Hair: Got it.
Asshat: Be there soon.
Blond bitch: Im heading over Yeongchan.
Ijin…
Right, that was his name.
He still hadn't gotten used to that…
It still felt odd for him to claim that name. It had to be his name since not only was that the nameplate on the room, 032 wouldn't lie about his name. But he had yet to assimilate his identity with that name. After years of going by 001, kid, bastard, and other titles, it felt odd actually having a name to claim for his own. Still, that was not one of his main concerns.
He kept on going through the messages. He was able to figure out everyone's names (hopefully) but he still didn't know what any of them looked like. 001 was going to assume that Blond bitch was the boy with blond hair, but other than that, he didn't know any of their faces to connect their names to.
The longer he stared at the pictures, the more his chest hurt. It felt like there was an invisible force pressing down on his chest, it did nothing but make it difficult to keep his mind clear and calm.
Maybe it was a sign he should call it a night.
Placing the phone on the nightstand, he curled up on the bed, unzipping the jacket and tugging it into place so it could cover his face. Like it had on the rooftop, the smell of the leather and familiarity lightened the imaginary weight on his chest.
As stupid as it sounded, he couldn't help but find comfort as he pulled the jacket tighter around him. Before he realized it, the warmth and security it provided pulled him into a deep sleep.
Running his hand through his hair, he heaved out a sigh as he walked down the hall.
Welp.
That somehow went just as bad, but also better than he thought. He was able to get 001 to calm down and stop being such a defensive asshole, as well as explain a few more things.
He had planned on telling 001 the idea Major Kang had thought of. For them to meet 001 in pairs and slowly acclimate him to a civilian lifestyle again. But after he had seen 001's pained look, his pained look that was barely illuminated by the phone on the dark rooftop, he couldn't bring himself to do it.
He had never seen 001 make a face like that.
There was just something about seeing 001 being sad, actually expressing his emotions for once that made Liam rethink the plan in favor of taking a step back to give him space.
Besides, they needed 001 to be cooperative, and if they pushed him over the edge because they were trying to acclimate him too fast, then he was going to fight them every step of the way. If there was one thing he's learned, that 001 was far more stubborn than he seemed.
Without a second thought, he opened the door to the room, and he had to resist the urge to roll his eyes when he saw the relieved look of Isak. Based on the way everyone was looking confused and/or frustrated, he was going to assume that Isak had tried and failed to communicate with them with his broken knowledge of Korean, " Really ?" He drawled out, poking fun as he said, " You can't even use google translate ?"
" Shut it!" Isak snapped out, a light blush on his face as he let his annoyance be known, " Stupid thing doesn't even fucking work! It doesn't translate anything right!" He doubted that since the chances of Isak doing it wrong were higher than a huge search engine being wrong.
"Is that so?" It didn't take a genius to know that Liam didn't believe him for a single second. Leaving Isak to fume in his seat, he turned to 001's friends and family, and bluntly said, "He definitely doesn't remember you guys." He didn't want to break their little hearts by saying that, but it had to be said.
Their faces fell, and with the exception of Hyeokjin, Major Kang, 001's grandfather, and the almost victim, they teared up. 001's sister looked the most upset (understandably so) and he gave them a few minutes to recompose themselves before he continued.
"But it looks like he'll work with us." Just the fact that 001 had relaxed enough to drink and smoke with him, meant that he felt safe enough to not bite people's heads off if they stood too close. "I wasn't able to ask him, but when I get the chance tomorrow morning, I'll ask if he wants to meet one of you guys." They all nodded in agreement, and when he saw Isak biting back a yawn behind his hand, that only helped his point as he said, "It's starting to get late. We'll talk about this more tomorrow, it's been a long day." He could tell that they were starting to get to the point where any conversation would be long and drawn out.
001's sister looked like she was going to protest, but thankfully, major Kang agreed with him, "He's right." To his credit, despite the fact that the soldier had been there since the morning, he didn't sound tired at all, "We're all tired, and it would be better if we talk about this after a night's sleep. Ijin won't be going anywhere."
Well, as long as they didn't spook him that is, but he wasn't going to say that and stress everyone out even more.
Since they trusted Major Kang more than him and Isak, they were quick to agree with him. With a few farewells, everyone was returning to their respective homes for the night. It wasn't until the major was looking at him expectedly when Liam remembered what he was waiting for.
"Shit," he looked around the room, and confirmed what he thought, "I forgot it. I'll go get it, 001 is probably still awake." He had one job, and that was to bring the majors jacket back after lending it to 001, especially since it was cold outside.
Major Kang waved him off with a smile. "It's okay. I can get it another time. How is he doing?"
Liam shrugged his shoulder, answering the man honestly because he knew that he could handle it, "He's not saying it out right, but he's pretty confused, upset too. But he's never going to say that, even when we got along well, he never told me anything like that." He could tell that the news upset the man, but as he thought, the soldier handled it better than the others would.
Major Kang slowly nodded his head. "Alright. Well, like you said, as long as we don't piss him off, he'll work with us. God…" Kang heaved out a sigh as he pinched the bridge of his nose, "I love the kid, but he was such a defensive ass when I first met him. I tried to give him a high five and he socked me in the face." Liam couldn't help but laugh when he heard that.
Yep. That sounded like 001. He always reacted like that when someone raised their hand towards him. Though to be fair, just about everyone reacted like that because it only took Mad Dog socking them in the face twice for them to learn to always be on guard.
"That sounds like him. He thinks he's 15 now, so he's going to be even worse in that aspect." Not to mention, he was going to be much more reckless compared to the 001 they know. Like everyone else at that time, 001 was in a headspace of 'Damn if I die, damn if I survive.' But he should probably keep that to himself.
That was enough for Kang to stare at him, a tired look on his face as his mouth hung slightly open, "Fuck." That accurately summed everything up. Their current situation was just a shit show that was waiting to happen.
But good to know that there was at least one other person who had an idea of how bad 001 used to be.
"As long as we don't piss him off," Liam said gently, "everything is going to be fine."
Probably.
Hopefully.
Honestly, if everything went well, he was going to be all types of surprised. Somehow, based on the look on Major Kang's face, it looked like Kang was thinking the exact same thing.
It was never comforting to know that you weren't alone in having a bad feeling about a situation.
