Tornado pulled into Vicarstown with a smile. After a week her anxiety had calmed and this new route was becoming familiar to her. She always liked pulling into this station as she could briefly speak with some of the Sudrian engines.
Thomas was often there with his two sweet little coaches and they would give words of encouragement to her. She found their company lovely and found herself hoping for their presence every journey.
She often got along with the smaller Tank engines and station pilots as they weren't stuck up and pompous like the bigger engines. She didn't talk down to them either which made her a favourite amongst them, often befriending them and avoiding the worst of their pranks and cheekiness.
She noticed a blue express engine would sometimes pull in at the same time as her and Thomas. Said engine was pulling in with his coaches with a sullen look on his face. He seemed to be depressed and Tornado felt sadness for him.
He hadn't spoken to her yet and it didn't seem to be out of malice or ignoring her existence like the other big express engines. He seemed to be shy or nervous around her so she didn't push to speak with him.
She was also afraid that the engine would mock and tease her like the other mainland engines.
"Hello Ms Tornado!" Thomas greeted as he pulled in. Tornado flashed him a wide grin.
"Hello little Thomas!" She returned his greeting happily. "Hello Annie and Clarabel!"
The tank engines coaches gave happy greetings to the big engine.
"Is there any news on my big brother?" She asked and Thomas frowned.
"I don't know," he said with a glance over at the big blue express engine. "I don't visit him that often. Gordon would have information on him, he visits him more than I do."
"Gordon?" Tornado asked, glancing over at the Sudrian No.4. "As in my brother's older brother? The one who pulls the Wild Nor' Wester?"
Gordon was surprised at her words.
"You know who I am?" He asked and gazed at Tornado shocked.
"Of course!" Tornado said brightly. "Flying Scotsman always talks about you."
Gordon stared at her in disbelief. "Well, he never told me about you," he found himself snapping and Tornado's expression darkened.
"He's overprotective of me," Tornado spoke quietly. "And the museum director asked him not to tell anyone. It's not his fault, please don't be mad at him."
Gordon stared at the engine who looked at him with sorrowful eyes. He could tell that she was hiding something and being cautious but didn't want to press her. He relented, realising how defensive he was currently being.
"He hasn't woken up yet," Gordon said sadly and a sad expression crossed Tornado's face. "They say they can't start repairing him until he does as it'll damage his mind if they do."
"He's afraid of scrapping," Tornado looked away from Gordon. "He constantly has nightmares about it. It's why he was in the Museum Steamworks for a decade. He tries to hide it from me but… but I know. He struggles with it so much. It hurts me when I see him hide his pain. It's like he doesn't trust me."
She sounded hurt as she spoke and Gordon felt a similar feeling. When they had been younger, the Flying Scotsman had been the same, evasive and dismissive of his own condition even when it was dire.
He always refused to speak about his true feelings putting on a show of bravado and arrogance instead even when he'd been close to being scrapped, he kept up the facade.
Gordon had stopped trying to get through that iron wall and over the years found himself increasingly annoyed by his younger brother's bravado and disparaging behaviour towards his own health. This latest incident had been a long time coming he had realised.
An uncomfortable silence hung in the air.
"Well, it was finally nice to meet you Gordon," Tornado said with a pained smile. "I just wish it was under better circumstances."
Gordon gave Tornado a small smile. The young engine was sweet, anxious and a little too happy at times, but she was a nice change from the snooty mainland engines.
"Same here Tornado," he smiled and grinned at her. "Brother would be proud of you, you're doing a grand job." He added and Tornado blushed deeply.
"Gordon rarely compliments people," Thomas said cheekily. "You should take it and run."
Tornado could only give a laugh at that.
"Oh I will!" She teased and began to pull away with a loud whistle.
Two and a half weeks after his accident, the Flying Scotsman finally awoke in the middle of the night, completely confused and in a state of panic.
It had taken hours to reassure him that he wasn't being scrapped and that he was safe. Even then, his memory slipped and he would often struggle to remember or lash out at his restorers in fear and anger in a state of delirium.
"He's never been this bad," the lead restorer, Jeremy, confided in Victor. "He would panic and become anxious but he would never be this delirious or out of it ."
Victor was worried. The Flying Scotsman's mind had clearly gone through something when he had been in his coma. The years of uncertainty and his fears had clearly taken its toll on the engine.
"This has been going on for years and was never addressed?" Victor asked.
"Well, Alan Pegler used to address it, we never had this problem when he was still here," Jeremy noted and Victor's smokebox suddenly lit up with realisation.
"Did, Flying Scotsman ever recover from the death of his friend?" Victor asked. "For what I understand, Pegler was closer to him than anyone. He must have been Scotsman's personal confidant. There was nothing to fear with Pegler around but-"
"But since he's been gone, he's only gotten worse," Jeremy said with an exasperated sigh understand where the small engine was going. "Tornado has expressed concerns about him getting worse in the past few years. However he refuses to confide in anyone. Even Tornado or the Director."
Jeremy gave a tired sigh and looked at the green engine sitting silently before them that was sleeping off the pain that this morning's repairs had caused.
"He's a very stubborn old engine," Jeremy muttered tiredly. "Always putting on a brave face."
"Much like Gordon," Victor noted. "Gordon will often refuse to admit when he needs repairs or show any vulnerability. I guess it must be a Gresley build thing."
Jeremy frowned.
"Would Gordon perhaps be able to speak with him?" He suggested and Victor frowned.
"Gordon visited many times but mainly because he was having nightmares of his own and needed his brother's company," Victor noted. "He hasn't seen him since he woke up though. From what I've heard he's been avoiding coming here."
"Maybe he doesn't want a confrontation with his brother?" Jeremy suggested.
A whistle sounded and they turned to find Thomas entering the steamworks.
"Hello my friend!" Victor greeted him. "What seems to be the problem today?"
"No problem Victor, I just wanted to visit the Flying Scotsman and tell him that Tornado is doing a grand job! She was extremely happy to hear he woke up last night," Thomas gushed.
He however stopped when he saw the sleeping Flying Scotsman.
"Oh was I wrong? Did I only hear a rumour?" He asked concerned.
"No, no my friend. Our friend woke up last night as you heard, he's only resting after having major work done this morning," Victor reassured the Tank Engine.
"Oh," Thomas rolled forward so he was in front of the Flying Scotsman.
The Green Engine began to stir, seemingly sensing someone's presence.
He wearily opened his eyes and looked around confused before noticing Thomas before him.
"Thomas…?" He asked, confused his eyes focusing and refocusing on him. "Where...? Are you real?"
"Real?" Thomas asked, confused. "Of course I'm real!"
Thomas rolled forward slightly and gently bumped the Scotsman's buffers.
The jolt seemed to wake the Engine up and his eyes suddenly focused. He looked around again as if confirming where he was then back to Thomas, flashing the little engine with a grin.
"Nice to know I'm not dreaming for once," his voice regained some of his confidence but there was still something shaky behind his new found bravado. "Hello Thomas. Apologises for not being my spectacular self but we all have bad days. At least I'm not as hideous as I was in America!"
Thomas could only give a small laugh.
"I've met Tornado, she's pulling your line and she's doing great! She's so lovely, I like her a lot. Gordon likes her too!" Thomas excitedly told the engine. "She wanted me to tell you that she misses you but she's doing her best for your passengers. She hopes you'll be repaired soon. She gets lonely when she has to sleep alone in the sheds."
The Flying Scotsman gave a hopeful smile.
"Tornado's a sweet girl. Anxious and self doubting but once she overcomes her weaknesses, she's just as strong as her predecessors if not stronger. I have no doubts in her abilities Thomas," he praised. "I had hoped that Gordon would meet her in better circumstances. He's not being a pompous twit to her is he?"
"No he reserves that for the rest of us," Thomas pouted and the Scotsman gave a laugh. "They get on really well. Gordon does tend to want to show off in front of her though. Show her 'how things are really done' unlike and I quote, 'that ridiculous brother of mine.'"
At that the Flying Scotsman gave a roar of laughter which was cut short as he suddenly gave strangled choke and a groan of pain. He was still in pain from having parts of his damaged boiler removed.
"Are you alright?" Thomas asked, concerned.
"I-" the Scotsman looked shaken for a second but then winced and put on a brave face. "Don't make me laugh like that." He scolded through gritted teeth.
"I'm sorry," Thomas apologised. The Flying Scotsman smiled through his pain at him.
"Tell Tornado I'm proud of her won't you?" The Flying Scotsman asked. "And tell Gordon to stop showing off. Tornado will think he's an idiot."
"I will," Thomas said as he moved to leave. "Get well soon Scotsman!"
The Flying Scotsman didn't reply, he only watched as the little tank engine left before the facade fell and his face twisted into an expression of pure pain.
Jeremy quickly rushed over and placed a hand on his buffer to reassure the engine as Victor quickly went to check on the damage to see if anything had accidentally slipped from the morning.
"A few of the remaining boiler tubes have slipped," Victor noted quickly. "They must have slipped after Thomas bumped him."
"You need to tell us when you're in pain," Jeremy scolded and the Flying Scotsman glared at him.
"I am not weak," he hissed angrily and Jeremy only shook his head. "I can handle some pain."
"We can't help you if we don't know what's wrong!" Jeremy said exasperated.
"Thomas would not have thought of you any less my friend," Victor interjected.
"He would have felt guilty for hurting me," The Flying Scotsman retorted and Victor fell silent, unable to argue his point.
"I am a strong engine," The Flying Scotsman declared more to himself than to those around him. "A symbol of Steam. I must not falter or show weakness."
"Mr Pegler wouldn't have wanted you to damage yourself. He would have wanted you to-," Jeremy cut in but he immediately froze when he saw the Scotsman's expression turn murderous.
"Get out of my sight," he quietly spat with a venom that made Victor's wheels unsteady. "Don't you DARE use his name against me you peasant."
Jeremy was a strong and steady man who was not easy to unnerve or fright. But he knew he had crossed a line with his words.
"Scotsman, I didn't mean to-"
"All of you," the Flying Scotsman snarled, the threat clear in his voice. "Get away from me!"
Without saying a word, his own crew, Jeremy and Victor left, avoiding the famous engines' gaze as best they could.
As Victor went to work on another engine, he could hear the muffled crying of the famous LNER A3.
"You need to see your brother," Thomas urged Gordon at Knapford station. "He thought he fooled me with his tough face but I could see how much pain he was in."
Gordon looked away from Thomas.
"He's kinda like you in that way, always hiding his weaknesses when everyone can clearly see them."
"I don't have weaknesses, I am Sodor's Fastest and Best Engine." He snapped back out of habit.
He didn't want to admit it but he didn't want to see his brother. It disturbed him to see his brother weak and he didn't know why.
"He also told me to tell you to stop showing off to Tornado," Thomas added and Gordon wheeshed in response.
"I'll do what I like," Gordon grumbled at Thomas.
"Who's Tornado?" Percy asked curiously as he stopped at the station.
"A big express engine like Gordon but isn't an absolute grumpus," Thomas jeered at him. "She's super friendly and happy, which is weird for a relative of Gordon."
"Why can't she pull the Wild Nor' Wester then?" Percy mused and Gordon gave an indignant grunt before pulling away from the platform.
"Peasants," he muttered, annoyed.
"I heard that!" Percy squeaked behind him.
Gordon found himself passing the Steamworks a while later. He suddenly realised he had slowed down unintentionally.
He felt conflicted.
Part of him wanted to see his brother but the other part simply did not and was terrified.
He felt a sinking feeling in his boiler when he heard the sound of someone crying.
It was his brother.
He stopped.
A few long minutes passed.
Gordon made his choice.
He steamed past the Steamworks and didn't look back.
