6. What am I doing?
The shock of kissing the hard floor of his room completely woke up her mind.
At first, she didn't care about his anger or taunts, and then an anger she didn't know lived inside her made her lash at him. It excited him, made him more brutal, which awakened her survival instincts.
Death never came and the pain, internal and external, seemed to never end. It wouldn't end. Tired of this suffocating agony that only seemed to fuel life in her veins, she begged.
She begged.
On her knees, she looked at the lustful face of the older man.
"Please! I didn't know what I was doing-"
"Of course, you did! I can only imagine how that felt." He said with a grin.
"I was –not! I'm stupid! I-I won't ever do that again."
"Do what?"
"Escape from here." She ended her sentence in a high-pitched voice, hope blooming in her core. They were finally talking. For once her wish would be fulfilled.
He looked surprised.
He looked human.
A sudden deep and loud sound erupted in the room.
Madara laughed. He laughed so hard; his large frame shook with the sound. As sudden as the sound appeared, it disappeared, leaving in its stead a satisfied smile on his handsome face.
"Escape… I can't believe you're stupid enough to think you could actually run away from this house. My dear, I saw you when you sneaked out with your shoes in hand." He paused but looked down with the same grin at her frightened face "I was a tad disappointed though. You hesitated for so long it almost took out all the fun."
He harshly tugged her hair, forcing her to stand. The sharp pain tingling her scalp was nothing compared to her fear of the man, of what was coming. No coherent thoughts could form inside her mind as terror devoured everything inside her.
Once again, she felt the need to beg.
"Please… please, don't-don't h-hurt me."
"You know, you were the first one to resist me and I've liked it… Well, among other things." He tugged harder, she cried "and today, you proved me right."
"Y-you d-don't have to do t-this." She sobbed, chocking on her own breath.
"You challenged me today and it got me all hot and bothered, you know. I can't refuse your invitation."
He pushed her hard onto the queen-sized bed. She crawled away from him, trying to catch her breath. At the corner of her eye, the glimpse of something shiny stopped her dead in her tracks.
There was a silver handcuff on the nightstand.
A little chuckle erupted from behind her.
"Did I already mention my unconventional pastime?"
That night he introduced her to the world of BDSM; that night she discovered what a sadist and unstable man she'd been given to; that night she discovered how alone she was and would always be.
That night, Madara fucked her mercilessly for hours, filling the room with her cries and his grunts of pleasure. Despite her pleas, despite the repeated bangs of the bed against the wall, no one came to save her…
She was alone indeed…
….
Hinata woke suddenly opened her eyes with a gasp. Her mind took a bit too long to focus on the ceiling softly lightened up by the lamp on her nightstand. She was awake, the last few minutes or hours were just nightmare yet she couldn't shake off the tremor in her muscles or loosen up her grips on the sheets.
How long will she have to take it all? Sleepless nights upon sleepless nights were starting to take a toll on her body. She was usually disoriented, her body felt heavier over time and dark thoughts kept torturing her in infinite loops.
Sometimes, she would think about death and how inviting it was; other times, she would wonder what exactly she was doing with her life. On more than one occasion, she'd just zoon out and emerge hours later, wondering what she'd done with her day. Obito told her once that she wasn't living anymore, she was merely existing. She had never agreed with him this much… at least inside her mind.
Maybe she just wanted to keep up appearances, pretend to be strong, keep Obito from seeing her vulnerability or finding a way into her heart but she didn't tell him how she really felt. She told him the lie she told herself every morning, a lie she didn't believe herself: her hatred was the thing keeping her alive.
Instead of her hatred keeping her alive, it was her keeping her hatred alive to hang onto it. It didn't work though. At first it didn't.
She didn't have to pretend anymore.
He came to her house to show off how happy he was! He dared to stand in front of her with that girl to mock her. After burning his house, she hadn't felt any need to chase him anymore, but that ultimate affront sparked a fire that wasn't there before.
He had left her behind in a cold, merciless world and in the cruel hands of a sociopath without ever looking back. He never came back looking for her… and she went through physical and mental tortures.
As much as she had adored him before, she hated him now.
She would hate him.
She had to.
..…
One month went by since their last encounter. In those few weeks Sasuke got a new job through Sakura, a new flat and everything was fine -too fine by his standards. No troubles, no annoying co-workers… no vengeful exes.
Hinata did nothing.
After all her threats and glares, she did nothing besides making him obsessed all over again. Sasuke started seeing her everywhere, even in his dreams. His mind allowed him breaks when he was doing something. He hoped tonight he was getting another break.
Naruto and Karin invited him to celebrate because of his life finally looking somewhat normal. The way they seemed suddenly close and the fact that Karin was much calmer than usual left Sasuke surprised but only for a short lapse of time.
They reached a bar Sasuke knew only too well.
Orikoyomio.
He didn't get the time to brood over the choice of his companions that Karin went to some other corner without a word once inside the place. Naruto didn't seem to mind. The blond turned to Sasuke and offered him to play pool. The latter found the situation stranger with each passing minutes.
Naruto kept chatting while Sasuke waited for his turn…
"You've never played pool before?" He asked with a smirk.
"Nope." She answered, shaking her head.
"Where have you been?" He asked with a grimace.
"Somewhere waiting for you I guess?" She answered with a shy smile.
"Come here. I'll show you how."
Sasuke took her arm, pulled her toward him and went behind her. He knew she was blushing but he liked teasing her; he liked being close to her. His mischievous intention dissipated as he leaned closer, turned into something else as she shuddered. They weren't found of PDA but sometimes they got lost in their own bubble.
"A-ano, Sasuke-kun… people are watching." She whispered, making no effort to get away.
Other times, Hinata remembered that she was shy.
"Let them watch." He whispered back.
"You're attracting too much attention."
"Are you – are you ashamed of me?"
"N-no! Sasuk-"
"I thought so."
"Stop teasing me Sasuke-kun!"
"I swear I've tried." He chuckled as he kissed her navy blue hair.
"I'll get back to you." She pouted but when she looked up, she smiled at him with red cheeks, and he smiled back "the pools aren't empty though. I don't want to ruin their game. We can wait a bit-"
"Do you wanna play?"
"Ye- no, it's okay for me Sasuke-kun."
"Look, I can go there and make us play-"
Hinata looked toward where her boyfriend pointed at. A different kind of shudder coursed through her and filtered into her voice when she protested feebly. Sasuke rolled his eyes. He grabbed her hand as he told her not to worry, but she wasn't having it.
"Now you're just being stubborn."
"Those people could be dangerous or worse and I couldn't take it if you went out of here with even a scratch." She smiled at him, even though her eyes were full of worry "So… be a good boy and wait with me for a free spot."
There were times like this when she would look at him with emotions, he couldn't put into words. He didn't know how much she loved him but sometimes he'd catch a glimpse through her actions, her words or her eyes. In those moments he'd realize that maybe her love wasn't that far from what he felt for her.
It made his chest squeeze so painful, yet overflow with warmth. Sasuke caressed her cheek and she leaned into his large palm; a little more demonstrative at the shelter of people's sight.
Sasuke shuddered out of his daydream and blinked multiple times. He shook his head, massaged his eyes but nothing seemed to work. The memory and its lingering bitter-sweetness persisted.
"Are you okay?"
"Yeah. Just thinking… remembering stuffs."
"Must be something good 'cause you looked like a schoolgirl thinking about her crush." Naruto laughed, proud of his jab. Sasuke gave him a dark look.
"What the actual fuck dumbass… tsk."
"Ooh, someone is hiding something!" Naruto wiggled his eyebrows.
"Instead of spouting nonsense, why don't you play?"
"It's your turn teme! But you're apparently too busy daydreaming about some chick you forgot where you're." Naruto laughed harder.
"I can see you still need that brain implant." Sasuke hissed through gritted teeth.
"You always say that when I touch on a sensitive topic." Naruto sneered.
"What about you? You seem close to Karin." He knew he couldn't win this war. Naruto was too noisy and the topic was definitely not teasing material.
"What's it to you?"
"Sensitive topic?" Sasuke fought down the smile creeping on his lips.
"Ha ha! Definitely funny but not as cute as you daydreaming about your crush five seconds ago." Naruto hugged himself as he mimicked kissing sounds.
"Whatever." Sasuke finally muttered before resuming the game. He could shut the blond up on many topics but this one was unfortunately one of his few fortes.
"The shirt and tie do you better service than this boring t-shirt. I'm pretty sure you've already got all the girls at your feet at work as usual." Naruto scoffed.
"Your wet dreams of me didn't come true this time."
"Dude, you're disgusting. Also, your ultimate dream came true!"
"You said it."
"What about your boss?"
"Yamato is fine, I guess."
"Gotta thank Sakura for finding your dream job for you."
"Dream job is a bit of a stretch but I thanked her, dad."
"Did you thank her as she deserves?"
"Oh, Great Sage, tell me how to do that." Sasuke rolled his eyes as he lifted his hands.
"I'm sure she'd love it if you'd finally ask her hand." Naruto snickered.
If Naruto tried to be funny, Sasuke found it anything but funny. The remark was innocuous in itself but it threw him back to recent conversations related to the same topics. It was the same bitter taste as the first time albeit less intense. He felt more annoyance, curiosity and a bit of suspicion. Of all the thousand things the blond could've said, he said that.
The silence dragged on long enough to make Naruto stop his game to look at his friend. Surprise tainted his face.
"W-what? Don't tell me-"
"Why would you say that of all things?"
"Because… I don't know? Ino kinda mentioned it to me? Did you do it, though?" Naruto eagerly stared at Sasuke who just rolled his eyes, muttering about gossiping blonds.
"As if." Sasuke scoffed "she just wants to move in with me… and she's discreetly mentioned getting married."
"Some big step there, man, some big step there."
"Is that all?" Sasuke asked after Naruto resumed playing as if nothing happened. "Aren't you going to force me to marry her or something?"
"You already know my thoughts on that matter. She's a nice girl who saved you without knowing you and you deserve a family and happiness." Naruto affected a nonchalance Sasuke wasn't buying into. They've had that conversation before and it went a different way "but that's your choice to make –you're an adult now. You know what you need."
"Glad to know you've learned your lessons." Sasuke sneered.
"BUT just in case, let's do this visualization exercise again, shall we?" Naruto said with open arms and a smile too large. Sasuke looked at the pool table, then back at his friend before settling in a slouched position against his stick. He knew he was going to need the support. "Think hard about your future. It'll help if you close your eyes."
"No."
"Ok, don't close your eyes. Now, imagine your life in… ten years? What do you see?"
"Same as yours."
"Married with an amazing woman I'll love and who'll love me and ton of kids surrounding us?"
"Yikes…"
"Seriously, Sasuke. You've got a nice job, a soon-to-be-doctor girl who loves your sorry ass and a child to start a family. Whatever you choose, think very carefully about that." Naruto leaned over the pool table and aimed. "I hope to be as lucky as you one day."
"You certainly don't try to settle down." Sasuke slightly scoffed. Despite the light tone Naruto's using, he could feel the weight of his friend's emotions behind those words.
"Uh. The girl's delivered to you on a silver platter. Me on the other hand, I've still got to find THAT girl. "
"Your lame excuses aside, I don't want to marry her… I'm not ready. But I don't want to be an absent father either."
"You want it your way, uh." Naruto said half joking; but part of him was frustrated with his best friend. He didn't try to hide it, as much as Sasuke didn't seem to care. Naruto didn't get any reaction out of Sasuke. "Is there something stopping you from accepting Sakura's devotion?"
Sasuke arched a brow.
"You say you're not ready to get married, yet you went to great lengths to marry Maleficent. Despite everything, you're ready."
"You just gave me another reason not to hurry things."
"Be honest, Sasuke." Naruto straightened a bit and breathed to prepare himself for what he was going to say next. He needed all of his courage indeed. Sasuke rolled his eyes, feigning nonchalance, even though, his tensed shoulders gave him away. "Are you, perhaps, still… in love with her?"
Sasuke leaned onto the pool table. His moves were exaggeratedly slow, too slow to make him appear uncaring. He didn't utter a word. Naruto almost regretted bringing that up, but it's been a whole, and he was tired of his friend pretending he's moved on without really doing it. Thus, the blond awaited his friend's next words with certain anxiety, watched as his companion's muscle tensed and his jaw twitch one time, two… until he lost count.
After what felt like an eternity, Sasuke breathed in deep.
Then out.
Sasuke was calm again, but his face was utterly blank. Naruto recognized there one of his tactics to conceal his emotions.
"Who are you-"
"Sasuke" Naruto interrupted. "Don't."
"I don't feel anything for her." Yet again, Sasuke didn't face him. A part of Naruto hung onto his words, wanting to believe him. Another part was afraid of what his friend's reaction might imply. The blond shoved the last part deep down.
"Well, then since you've gotten over her, I propose you to let go of the past and move on too."
"That's what I do. Everyday."
"No" The word stretched under the weight of Naruto's annoyance but he controlled himself. "What you're doing is planning for a revenge I see no purpose in. What you gonna do? Kill her?"
"NO!" Sasuke hissed, then calm down. "No. I just don't know yet…"
"Sasuke, Sasuke." Naruto grabbed his friend by the shoulders and turned him around. They came face to face. Something in Sasuke's expression softened the blonde's tone.
Naruto sighed and let go.
"Had you ever been unfaithful to her?"
Sasuke scoffed. "No…"
"Have you ever told her, 'Hey! That dress makes you look fat?'"
"…Seriously?"
"Seriously."
"No."
"Have you ever won an argument against her?"
"Where are you going with all these questions?"
"Just trying to tell you that you've never, ever done anything that could've pissed even normal girls out there. Why would she want to hurt you? Because you didn't agree on the movie to watch?"
"How about you ask her why she burned down my house next time you chat with her."
"My guess is she just wants you to sign the divorce papers to keep her bloody money all for herself."
"Oh, I didn't know you're a confidant of hers."
"Let's be serious for one minute there. If she really wanted to kill you, that'd have been done long time ago. Just sign her fucking papers and we'd be done with it."
"Let me recap everything. Instead of sending me the papers or forcing me to sign it, she burned down my house to make me sign it."
"Yeah, that's pretty much it."
"You're both either dumb or crazy."
"It's just a way to enter your mind and keep you away."
"You're making this up as you talk."
"Well," Naruto taking a short pause and stretched the lone word. Both of them knew he was buying time. "It might be true but it sounds logical because she's powerful and you're still alive." It was Sasuke's turn to stiffen and search for his words. His silence was all the encouragement the blonde needed. "I'm not taking her or her actions lightly, but I think her ultimate goal is money. Also, you should keep a low profile. You shouldn't defy her. Now that I think about it, we shouldn't have gone to her house."
"It's a bit too late for that." Sasuke bitterly chuckled.
"Tell me about it." Naruto imitated his friend. "Not like your girlfriend helped, even though I've understood what she was trying to do."
"What are you talking about?"
"Didn't you get it? Tsk, Sasuke, I didn't know you were that bad with women."
"Like you're one to talk." Sasuke rolled his eyes.
"It's about the good ol' tale of the new girlfriend rubbing it in the ex-girlfriend's face. It's guaranteed to hurt, especially if said ex still has feeling for the guy." Sasuke scoffed; Naruto shook his head as he chuckled. "Girls are crazy like that. Anyway, sign the papers quick and keep it low. Eventually, she'd get tired of you, no offense."
"What makes you think that it'll work?"
"Because she's just a gold digger, she has no reasons to go after you and you owe her nothing."
"Well, she seems to think otherwise. She said so after your dramatic exit."
It was Naruto's turn to scoff. "She accepted to marry the man who locked up her stepfather and tried to kill you. She was the one who walk away despite your sacrifices and your feelings. She was supposed to be your wife, she'd said her vows yet she chose money. Tell me again what you did to her to deserve that? Nothing. So, it's gonna be alright."
"Hey, Naruto!"
Naruto looked behind Sasuke.
"Ino?"
"How are you doing? Sasuke-kun?" The bubbling blond girl smiled widely as she approached the duo.
"What are you doing here?" Naruto asked, amazed to see her there. She'd never come to the place, no matter how desperately Naruto had tried to make her. His surprise morphed however into pleasure and excitement, her contagious smile infecting him.
"What do you think I'm here for dumbass!" Ino elbowed Naruto playfully and ruffled his hair. They struggled a bit together. The giggles and gazes exchanged between the two blondes made Sasuke feel more and more like the designated third wheel.
"Is Sakura-Chan there?" Naruto asked after sometimes. Ino sighed, Sasuke shook his head. He couldn't believe it was the same Naruto from twenty minutes ago.
"Always Sakura-Chan, Sakura-Chan. It's like she's your girlfriend instead of Sasuke's." Ino pouted slightly. Sasuke felt like she was joking, but only partly. "No, she isn't there."
"Well, how about a game? I'm pretty sure I'll get your ass handed back to you."
"Ugh, you're the worst!"
After some time, some co-workers of Sasuke found them, along with Suigetsu, Juugo, and Karin who kept her distances. The evening went on smoothly, and Sasuke tried to relax as much as possible.
His new neighborhood was still as deadly quiet as the older one but it was safer and better in term of design. It wasn't his intention to move out but that same evening after coming back from Hinata's house, Kakashi threw him out and said he'd move out too. He'd never asked why and accepted it as it was. It was about time he became an independent young adult. The house had too many undesirable memories anyway.
In his new flat, he seemed to breathe better. Since Kakashi was even more absent than before and didn't seem to have a fixed residence, Sasuke made a second key for him to come over if needed. Thus, it was with neither fear nor apprehension that he found his door unlocked.
"Kakashi?"
In the middle of undoing his tie, two shadows detached from the corner of his eyes. He stiffened. There were two complete strangers sitting in his living room. He abruptly faced them. They looked like the businessmen type who would let other people handle a fight for them, still Sasuke braced himself. Surprise, anxiety and adrenaline tightened his muscles, preparing him for his next moves.
The two men were tall, wore sharp black suits looking expensive and had their long dark hair in neat ponytail. The younger one's face seemed to pull at some forgotten strings, but nothing resurfaced in his memories.
Only one name came at the front of his mind, the same name that had been terrorizing him for months. He felt so stupid at that moment.
"Who the fuck are you?"
"This is Itachi Uchiha and I'm Izuna Uchiha."
He knew it.
He felt so stupid.
The Uchiha name, the expensive clothing… it was definitely Hinata's signature. His muscles stiffened under the weight of that thought alone. He racked his brain, searching desperately a way out of this predicament. They wouldn't take him down.
Not without a fight.
He took a step forward.
"Sasuke…"
His head turned to his left. His gaze fell on an abnormally white Kakashi sitting in one of the dark brown sofas. He couldn't help but wondering what the hell they did to put the man in such a state.
They were going to pay it. She was going to pay it.
He looked everywhere to make sure they were only two.
"Please, take a seat. We've got to talk."
