There is a knock on the door of the Hawkeye house, disrupting the silence for the first time in days. A moment passes before Riza comes down the stairs with a bulky, half-full box in her arms; her steps are hurried yet careful, her chest rising and falling with deep, anticipatory breaths. At the first floor landing, she slows to a stop. She sets the box down by her feet, watching the door in disbelief, hoping she didn't just imagine what she heard.
When her visitor knocks again, she inhales sharply. It's the closest to a smile she has had on her face in the past few months.
The living and dining rooms are a mess to weave through, with Riza having spent several days now sorting through the things her parents had left behind, things she had forgotten they even owned. She isn't sure what to do with them yet, only that they've given her something to do besides grieve her father and wait—for a word, for a visit, for anything that has to do with Roy Mustang, whom she last saw when he returned from the military academy just in time to see Berthold Hawkeye die, buried him, and then learned the secrets that Riza had been left to guard.
Despite the disarray, Riza quickly finds her way around to the door. A part of her is cautiously optimistic, which is difficult not to be after not having heard from Roy for months. But another part already knows what she is going to say when she finally sees Roy again. She knows, because she has believed in him for as long as they have been friends, and since last seeing him, she has only come to believe in his ambition and his plans even more.
Riza's heart drums in her chest as she opens the door.
"Roy? What are you doing here?"
It was the prettiest of spring days when Riza last saw Roy. The sky was as blue as it could ever be, the clouds feathery and almost incandescent in the sunshine; the palette of greens in the meadow and the trees swaying in the gentle breeze was rich and vibrant; wildflowers grew like little flames illuminating the side of the road. Even the near-empty, overgrown, mostly neglected Hawkeye house seemed a little brighter, more alive, with everything around it in full bloom.
Roy's appearance was a pleasant surprise when Riza opened the door. She couldn't have expected him there, not when he had left just the day before for his trip back to Central. She had thought that by then, she would already be adjusting to his absence following weeks of sharing the secrets of flame alchemy with him and finding comfort in his company after losing her father. She had thought that with his earlier departure, they would have already truly gone their separate ways.
But there he stood at her doorstep, unexpected but welcome, and Riza had never been happier to be proven wrong. Roy nodded slightly to acknowledge her, smiling just enough for her to catch it.
"My train to Central isn't leaving until tomorrow," he began. "And I realized that I couldn't just go without saying a proper goodbye to my friend, so I came back."
In Roy's hand was a small but lovely bouquet of fully bloomed, deep pink roses, held together by twine and a silk ribbon. Riza blinked, and a moment passed before she realized that Roy meant the flowers for her. Slowly she took the roses from him, staring at them, then at Roy in confusion. "I didn't think it had to come with flowers for it to be a proper goodbye."
He chuckled. "I saw these at a shop downtown, and right away, I thought of you. Roses mean many things, you see. In deep pink, they mean gratitude and appreciation. I could never thank you enough for what you've done for me since I came back to Cameron."
Riza sighed, smiling at the roses wistfully, almost dazedly. "I suppose we could call it even. You took care of the arrangements for my father's funeral when I had no one else to turn to. You were all I had."
"Hey." Roy placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder, pulling Riza back into the present. "Your trust means more to me than these roses can say. You know what I want to do for this country, and you will always be a part of that." He paused, and smiling warmly, he added, "Whatever I accomplish from now on, I owe it to you. I hope you'll remember me like I'll remember you."
"Of course," was all Riza could say. But beneath it was something new; Riza was not used to impermanent farewells or happy separations. She had always only known about losing those she held dear, then never looking back as she dealt with the emptiness that came with loss. Things to remember someone by, a bond unbroken by distance, a future point at which separate roads might meet again—these were all things that came with Roy.
As he nodded a final time and began his way back to the carriage waiting just outside the gate of the Hawkeyes' garden, Riza called out to him, "Roy, wait!"
Roy turned to face her again, his head tilted askance. Riza drew a quick, deep breath. Could she afford to place so much faith in him?
"When you pass your State Alchemist exam," she said as steadily as she could manage, "will you write to me?"
Roy smiled. "I will."
Riza clutched the roses more closely to her chest. "I'll be here when you need a friend."
"Miss Riza Hawkeye?"
Riza opens the door and finds an unfamiliar, brown-haired military officer on her doorstep, his backdrop an overcast sky and a barren landscape. The green hills and flowers in every bright color have all turned gray in the winter; the breeze is uncomfortably chilling rather than pleasantly cool. It isn't the first time that she mistakenly expected to welcome Roy back upon opening the door, but the sight before her is such a sharp contrast to that fond memory of Roy in spring that her heart sinks.
She lingers awkwardly for a moment, almost failing to notice the crisp, cream-colored envelope that the military officer is offering her. When she takes the envelope at last, she examines it carefully. On the back, her name and address are written in handsome, formal lettering, and the postage stamp is embossed with the seal of the Amestris State Military Academy. Partly imprinted across the stamp, in faint blue ink, are the words NOTICE OF ADMISSION.
Her heart skips a beat.
A number of emotions rush through Riza all at once. Disbelief, agitation, an elation she hasn't thought herself capable of feeling for a very long time. The news isn't entirely a surprise, but here at last is proof of the path she began carving out for herself in the past few months. She shuffles her feet as if trying to figure out which of these things she ought to properly feel or react to, but what surfaces first is unease. Where is a friend with whom she could share one of the few good things in her life when she needs one?
"Officer?"
Riza approaches the officer just as he is about to enter his car. In the back of her mind, she already knows the answer, but she goes on to ask, "When are the State Alchemist exams being held?"
He pauses to think. "They normally would have been held last month, miss. But I heard that the program has been more active lately because of the war, and the military is regularly in need of more State Alchemists. This year, there have been exams every other month."
The news sinks into Riza amid deep breaths. She nods after a moment. "I see. Thank you."
Back inside the house, Riza closes the door behind her but doesn't immediately move from where she stands. She takes a long, lingering look around the mess of things in several boxes, all piled up and out of place and a reflection of her state of mind. She thinks of how, all these months, she has heard nothing from Roy; how the few letters she sent all went unanswered; how, knowing him, he must have already passed the certification exams by now; and how she will be walking into this newly opened door in her life without him.
All at once, Riza realizes that she has nothing more to expect from him or the friendship she believed she had with him. Roy had not shared his triumph with her. Reaching out to share hers with him has been in vain.
She has never felt more alone.
Riza draws a deep breath before retreating upstairs to continue going through her family's things, and later begin packing for the military academy. She doesn't miss the last lonely reminder of her connection with Roy as she passes through the living room: a vase on the mantelpiece containing the roses he had given her, faded and dead.
