Bad Habits

He likes the violence. Loves the smack of hand to flesh. Reddened skin and moans. He likes that she'll follow him there, that she can't help herself. Blood will have blood, or so the saying went. It followed that flesh would have flesh.

It was so easy to get lost in sensation. Let his want sweep over her, igniting her own. Especially after a fight. His pleasure in fist to jaw, boot to belly, blood lust growing, transforming into the need for sex, lust for life. Simpler to give into his feelings than to deal with her own disquiet regarding her abilities and the inevitable result of them. Like a paper boat in the wake of his desires, pleasure washing through her, washing away her distaste for earlier activities, leaving only a thin dirty film of dislike when all was said and done.

Afterwards...that was the problem. (Well, the problem apart from how it always began, which she didn't truly enjoy either.) He had no respect for her as a person. No understanding that being good at something didn't mean pleasure was taken in it. No interest in conversation beyond his own simple desires. He was not one for introspection, even after the death of his shepherd. She could try to explain the problem, but it was far too easy to see he wouldn't actually care. Short term benefits were his style.

He'd figured out too, that if he started a bar fight, she would inevitably get swept up in it, defending herself or others of the crew. So many minds, and his one of the loudest, pushing emotions at her…self-preservation dictated participation, or she'd be overwhelmed, cowering as she once had when she'd felt Reavers and their rage. And once she started fighting...the rest of it was inevitable.

She'd theorized for several months now that he'd begun to start the fights deliberately in order to achieve the end result he wanted. But this last time she had proof of it.

Nothing anyone else would understand. Nothing she could even prove to anyone outside her mind. But that clear thought, like an arrow, 'Start up a tussle and the girl will come tumbling into bed, best piece of trim I've ever gotten for free'. Hearing that, ringing with clarity, loud in her mind, made a difference. All his thoughts during and after, hazy with lust, sated or enflamed, could be misinterpreted, emotions coloring them in pretty hues, easier to feel rubbing against her mind. Truth softened and faded, difficult to distinguish fact from fantasy.

He didn't even like her, not really. Sure, he liked certain things about her. The deadly way she could fight. Her legs and pì gu. And her skill with a weapon. Any weapon. Guns, knives, a broomstick, on one memorable occasion a wrench...he admired all of them. But he didn't like her. He didn't want to spend any time talking to her. He scorned her hobby of reading (books, not gun or girly magazines). Found her dancing more of a tease than anything enjoyable. Thought drawing was a waste of paper and pencil. Had no patience with her interests. Any of her interests.

In an effort to forge an actual relationship (despite the crew's (rightful) misgivings), she'd expressed an interest in his skills of hunting and tracking, his hobbies of lifting weights and gambling, and his family. All of her attempts had been firmly (and crudely) rebuffed.

It was quite clear that he only had one use for her and even that was due to the lack of coin required in the transaction. He'd more than once commented upon her general 'skinniness', lack of breasts, hips and height, and her inability to look like an adult woman. She was a warm body to have under (or over or whatever) his and he didn't have to pay to have her. Free (skinny/ugly) sex was better than sex he had to pay for or no sex at all.

It was time for this to end. And if it meant she didn't go out to the saloons or taverns with the rest of the crew, then so be it. Maybe without her there, Jayne wouldn't start fights and the crew would be safer for it.

She stood from the bed she'd been using as a couch. She would tell Mal immediately. He would understand and support her decision once she explained. And he would listen to her patiently while she did so. Mal was good that way.


Mal had been relieved when she'd stopped coming out, once he figured out that she and Jayne weren't 'sexing' anymore. The crew had made it clear that they all welcomed her company, but they understood why once she explained it. Actually, she'd explained to Mal and Mal had put it in terms the rest of them could understand. Granted, Mal's understanding was a little lacking and his explanation to the crew very simplistic, but they at least wouldn't try to coax her into coming out. Not when it meant putting herself in such a situation again. Simon had been embarrassed and disturbed but he'd also been grateful that she didn't fancy herself in love with the uncouth gun hand.

Four months she'd stayed on the ship while everyone else went out and she was going stir-crazy. Excursions for supplies, work and necessary shopping weren't the same as social outings. Much as she loved Serenity, it felt like the walls were closing in. Fresh air, the taste of whiskey or, even better, rice wine, music that wasn't off the cortex, the voices of people she didn't know like the back of her hand... she craved it like an alcoholic craved a drink.

She'd have to risk it. If she was lucky then Jayne would have already found company. Unlucky...she'd have to run for it and hope that the crew would do all right without her help. This bit of shore leave was also business; Mal had set up a meet through a couple of his contacts that had survived the Operative's purge. She'd been able to tell that he was uneasy about a meet without his ace in the hole (another nickname he'd given her) being present. He wanted another pilot. Someone who, like River, could take a shift on the bridge but also act as a gun hand if needed. And presumably with more brains than Jayne if not quite equal to her mind.

There wasn't anything wrong with that. It was a good, practical notion, and River agreed that another hand with a gun or on the bridge would be very helpful. But it meant that unless the meet happened earlier in the evening, Mal and the rest of the crew couldn't just vacate the bar if a fight broke out. All the more reason she should join them there.


She liked to sit at the bar, watch the rest of the place in the mirror behind the bottles, turn on her stool and let her gaze flow over the various individuals sitting down the row from her. She'd worn a dress with long sleeves, but a low wide neckline that exposed her shoulders and a bit of upper arm... a cut similar to her Reaver dress. That outfit had been ruined with blood and viscera that had stained the cloth beyond washing.

The skirt of this dress, the same length, but slit to her knees on either side for greater ease of movement, was also of an ombre fabric from pale blue to navy. From the base of her hips to under her arms and straight up the front of the bodice to her cleavage (meager as it was) laces allowed her to fit the fabric as tightly or loosely to her body as she preferred. She'd made sure it fitted snugly enough to make the most of her waist and breasts. She might be skinny, but she did have a figure (despite Jayne's frequently stated opinion).

The bartender, conscious as any professional of his environment (and the potential for tips), came down to check on her and she smiled. "Sippin' whiskey? If you have it? Or saké?" Mal had taught her about 'Sippin' Whiskey', how to roll it on the tongue and let it warm in her mouth to get the best of the taste and afterglow of fruits.

He nodded and brought a small jug of saké, a warmer and the customary little cup along with an extra should she encourage someone to share the drink with her. She inhaled the scent and nodded, fishing a coin out of her cleavage only to have a huge, tanned hand put a coin down in front of the bartender.

"I've got the lady's drink," A roll of thunder, lightning striking down a tree and the sound of it only now reaching her ears. That voice seemed to chase over her skin, raising prickles of awareness, raw electric power. Turning put her back to the room for a moment and she looked up, and up, into a pair of gleaming silver eyes.

"He buys a little girl a drink?" River tilted her head, feeling her hair drift over her bare shoulders. She'd pulled half of it up in a knot at the crown of her head and the rest fell loose down her back. The movement also gave her an excellent view of the tavern in the mirror behind the bar.

She found Mal and the rest of the crew at a table in the far corner of the bar, drinks and food in front of them, the adults playing Tall Card while Emma played with plastic blocks on the tabletop. She wasn't the only child in the tavern, though she was one of the youngest. Mal had a habit of picking less seedy bars/pubs for meets that weren't entirely criminal. The kind that didn't mind children underfoot so long as they didn't interfere with business.

Jayne hadn't moved from the card table where she'd first seen him with several other customers, though now he had a lushly curved blonde on his knee and snuggled up against his chest. He was giving her, as well as the cards he held in his hand, an equal amount of attention and didn't look up to see that River had come to the tavern for a good ten minutes. To be fair, Mal and the others hadn't noticed either.

When Jayne did see her at the bar, he smirked as if he'd won some sort of bet. River felt her spine stiffen and turned her gaze back up to the huge (it was almost ridiculous) man with the silver eyes. "No," He gave her a half smile. "I bought you a drink. And you're not a little girl are you?"

"No," She agreed, half smiling back without even thinking about it. She could hear Jayne's thoughts, his plans, and deliberately pushed his presence out of her mind to concentrate on the huge (and fairly fascinating) male beside her. Pouring the saké for him and for herself gave her a moment to touch his mind. Odd. Odd and fascinating. He wasn't blank. But he wasn't the morass of chaos, thoughts and feelings vying for space inside his brain like every other mind she'd felt.

Contained. That was the only word she could use to describe him. He felt…balanced. An ancient quote floated to the top of her mind, 'be water' and she nodded as she finished her little cup of saké. "Be like water," She murmured and wondered if he'd have any idea what she meant.

"Yeah," He nodded and she could hear his thoughts, crisp, deliberate, about the quote, about the man who'd written it and he gave her a genuine smile. "Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one." The same ancient source, quoted back at her.

The sharp, sudden sound of flesh meeting flesh, cracked through the air and River winced. Jayne had begun the steps of their little dance and sooner or later she'd have to take her place unless she left right now. But she couldn't leave her crew now that she was here. It always felt wrong to even think about it. Mal and Zoë couldn't do everything, and she'd be needed to protect the rest of them. She'd be pulled into Jayne's orbit and afterwards...she'd have to somehow resist the pull of that familiar dance.

Contrary to her expectations the man beside her didn't stiffen or posture, nor did he leap into the fray centered on the minimal dance floor near Jayne's table. Picking up the saké, warmer and cups in one hand he courteously grasped her elbow in the other and tugged her back towards the quieter private rooms on one side of the bar. Little more than alcoves with a booth inside them, they were still out of the way. Absently she noted he had an excellent read of body language to understand she wouldn't mind his manhandling (gentle though it might be).

"Doesn't want to join in the fight," River wondered thoughtfully. Big men like him usually liked a good fracas. Even Mal enjoyed the occasional rowdy brawl. (Although as he got older those occasions became fewer and further between.)

"Bruise my knuckles on some idiot's face or enjoy your company…" He shook his head. "I figure when it gets to us we can join in, but why waste the time until it does," He shrugged. "'Sides, that guy we were quoting, he didn't seem to believe in starting a fight. Just finishing it. Don't back down but don't rush into it either."

"The most dangerous man is the one who listens, thinks and observes," River recalled another of the sayings and got a grin like lightning across his face, brightening his eyes and stern features to something almost boyishly mischievous. Even this close, concentrating on him, his mind didn't bother her any more than anyone else's, and considerably less than most others.

"Balance is everything, isn't that another thing he said," That rumbling voice glanced towards the main area of the tavern as he poured her another cup of saké. "The essence of fighting is the art of moving at the right time." Bright silver eyes met hers and his lips quirked in a tiny grin, "So what's a lady like you doing here?"

"Going stir crazy on the ship," She admitted. "Needed different sights and sounds. Tried to stay away but…" She shrugged. She could have gone to another bar. Could have done a dozen other things but she'd come to the same place as her crew. Testing herself? Or just admitting that even she couldn't fight the inevitable?

"But?" He hadn't missed the direction of her gaze, how her eyes were drawn to Jayne, the joyous violence of his thoughts. His mind already on the (what he considered) the payoff of the fight.

"Every pure intention ends when the good times start," She murmured. "A fight would begin... I would fight, move, feel him, alive…and for a few moments we had a connection. That joy in the violence...contagious... Sex. But he doesn't like me as a person. Doesn't even really find me attractive as a woman. It's just sex to him. Sex he doesn't have to pay for. So he starts a fight knowing I'll get pulled into it and need some sort of…connection afterwards. Or I'm left reeling and rudderless, spun about, wide eyes stare into space..."

He was observant, noticed the same things she had, that Jayne had begun the fight. "It wasn't intentional at first but later he started the fights on purpose, just to get you worked up, like tonight," Her (thus far) nameless drinking companion surmised. "You like fighting?"

No one had ever asked her that before. They'd assumed she enjoyed it because she was good at it. But she was good at anything she set her mind to, and fighting was no different. "No," She shook her head, surprising herself with her honest answer. "I'm good at it. But I don't like it. No more than a gun likes being fired or a blade enjoys piercing skin and drawing blood."

"You think of yourself as a weapon, that's all you'll ever be," He leaned over the table. "What do you like?"

"Dancing," River didn't even have to think about the answer. "Flying. Art. Music, books, physics…" She shrugged and met his gaze, expecting his eyes to have glazed over and was pleasantly surprised to find that they hadn't.

"Flying," He gave her another one of those lightning fast grins. "Got that in common. Like reading. Art, depends on what it is… dancing…haven't done much of it… Music…same as art, it depends on the type."

He glanced towards the developing brawl, "How long would it take before you got pulled into the mess?"

"Another ten minutes at the most," She sighed. "If I leave now…" She stared at Jayne. How did she explain it? The draw of that passion? How it was so strong it swept her up in it? "Every time you come around, you know I can't say no... Every time the sun goes down, I let you take control. I can feel the paradise before my world implodes…"

"Self-destructive pattern," He seemed to understand.

"I lose control of the things that I say…" Fine line she was treading. Hinting at the problem without saying it. Had to keep the secret. The rowdy joy and violence surrounding them was getting to her, she was becoming desperate to be understood and that way danger lurked. "He makes the bed but she must lie in it…"

"It catches hold of you," He murmured. "That violence, the exhilaration, gets your blood up. And he knows it. So he starts this shit and you get pulled in. And he reaps the benefits while you feel like crap afterwards." She nodded silently and he held out his hand. Bemused, she did the same and couldn't help the smile that curved her lips as he wrapped his fingers around her hand and rubbed his thumb over her knuckles. "So… maybe you fight with me…break the pattern some."

"Not a good idea," River demurred, and her voice came out halfheartedly. "She is…dangerous."

"Join the club," Oh that wicked smile, gleaming eyes and that voice like a roll of thunder wrapped in velvet. "Maybe I oughta introduce myself. Richard. Richard B Riddick."

"River," She knew she was staring and she couldn't make herself stop. Half the 'verse knew his name and the other half should because his exploits had been all over the news for the last decade. "And you want to fight…with me." She shook her head because this was a bad idea, possibly the worst idea ever.

"Well… I really want to have you," He admitted with a grin. "Fighting… that's fine. Could be fun." A low chuckle, darkly amused, "Showing off for you… gotta admit, that's something of a draw. I like the way you move. Walked through the crowd, like every step is a dance, every breath, deliberate. Your hips sway, bending like a reed in the wind and water. You move like water."

She'd never heard anyone describe her like that. Like she was someone to be desired even before she started dealing out pain, swept up in the violence of someone else's passions. And everything she could hear in his mind… "You're not…exaggerating or lying…you think I'm attractive and you've never even seen me fight."

"Don't need to see you fight," He grinned at her. "But if you want to, I won't turn you down."

She looked at the bar fight, showing no sign of falling to pieces despite the time passing, "Soon we won't have a choice. The whirlwind sweeps up all in its path."

"Well, you know what the man said," Riddick smiled. "Be water. Empty your mind, be formless, be shapeless like water." He chuckled, "What's that old thing from the bible? È yǒu 'èbào. I think it's about time someone showed that ex of yours that he isn't the alpha predator around here."

River tilted her head thoughtfully as she looked over and saw Jayne happily beating someone. Mal and Zoë were taking on anyone stupid enough to try and get to Simon and Kaylee while the two of them protected baby Emma. "You wish to…show off for me?"

A wicked chuckle, "I want you to want me." Something in his expression, his eyes, knowledge. He knew something she didn't. Possibly quite a few things since his thoughts didn't boil up out of his skull like an exploding pressure cooker. He wasn't hard to Read precisely but he didn't shout his thoughts either. "You end up fighting to keep your crew from getting hurt. Let's both of us do that. I'll be right beside you and if he comes at you afterwards... wanting the same thing... well...if he got to you and you want it, you'll have another option."

"You mean if I want you," River allowed herself to study him, evaluating that huge musclebound frame wrapped in darkly tanned skin and black clothing. His skull and face shaved almost smooth, dark hair barely showing as it began to grow out. Big hands, callused but gentle. Until he smiled his face was handsome but stern. And those eyes of his were captivating. "What if I don't, at the end of it?"

"Well, no harm no foul," Riddick gave her wink with one of those boyish grins and clinked his glass to hers. "But I reserve the right to try and change your mind."

The last of the saké warmed her throat and River nodded. It was worth a try. If nothing else, it was a break in the pattern. "All right."


Odd. So odd and strangely delightful. To fight beside someone who considered a fight just one more job to be done. Satisfaction to be one of those still standing. Admiration aimed in her direction. Enjoyment of how well she moved mixed with a healthy amount of lust. A steadying hand at the small of her back when she swayed with the force of Jayne's emotions once the violence was over. Concern and a glass of cold water put in her hand. Gulp it down like it was ambrosia, and breathe, slow and steady as possible.

Jayne's smug face, swaggering over towards them. Hot blue eyes on her, "Feel like gettin' outta here?" She could feel him looking her up and down, smirking over how she'd come back. Thinking of how he'd fuck her and how she'd like it. How nobody else wanted her and how desperate she had to be after a four month dry spell.

A low rumble beside her, the growl of thunder and one big hand slid up and down her spine before a chair was found and she was gently seated upon it. Not Core manners but caring and polite all the same. "She seems fine where she is," Riddick's voice, sturdy solid presence, calm in the eye of the storm.

"Lil Albatross, you all right," Mal. Worry. Affection. "Like some more saké?"

A big hand on her shoulder, a lock of hair rubbed between two thick nimble fingers, "That's not a bad idea." She looked to her right and Riddick pulled out a seat beside her, sprawled in it between her and Jayne. And all the while, still managing to appear like he could cut Jayne's throat in half a second.

"Nah, she just needs to get out, cut loose a little," Jayne...still smirking, still looking at her like she was a cheap piece of beef protein he was getting for free.

"And I'm pretty certain the woman can speak for herself," Riddick retorted.

"Here," Kaylee, bless her, knew what would help. "Hold Emma and tell her a story." She plopped the toddler into River's lap where the curly haired little girl immediately went for River's hair. Riddick laughed and quickly swept the long dark stuff over River's shoulder and down her back, safely out of reach. River felt her lips curve automatically at the sound and looked at him, her arms wrapped around the baby.

"Now there's a pretty picture," He grinned, lightning fast and she had the thought that his smile was the lightning and his voice the thunder. The image in his mind, her with the baby in her lap, strangely unaugmented by imagination, nothing but enjoyment of just how things were at the moment.

"C'mon Kaylee, that ain't what she needs," Jayne. Rude, crude, projecting lust at her as if she was his for the taking. He made as if to move closer and the humor in Riddick's eyes died a hot painful death as he stared at the goateed blue-eyed gun hand

River took a slow deep breath and looked up at Jayne, "It is possible that you know what the girl needs." She conceded and those blue eyes looked both smug and triumphant. "But it does not necessarily follow that the girl needs it from you."

She'd seen that sneer a thousand times before. When she'd been more than half crazed, when she'd become sane… that sneer never changed. 'I know more than you', it said. 'No one really wants you'. 'Nobody ever will, no real man wants a girl who can see into his head and kill with a spoon'.

River sighed, "Jayne, zǒu dé hěn yuǎn hěn kuài."

"Why don't you go back to the whore you had on your knee," Riddick suggested in the coldest voice she'd ever heard, including her father's, her brother's and Mal's. "See if she'll still have you."

Jayne hawked and spat, and Riddick simply looked disgusted before turning his gaze deliberately towards Mal. Miffed and ignored, the gun hand stomped off. "So, word is you're looking for a pilot? Someone who can use a gun and doesn't mind getting his hands dirty now and then."

Mal nodded slowly, clearly taking Riddick in with new eyes as he realized this was the person he'd come to meet. "Yeah, we are. 'Tross is a good pilot but there's times we need her on the job with us."

Riddick looked at her thoughtfully, "I can see where she'd come in real handy." He considered the Captain and seemed about to make another comment but simply nodded silently.

Simon, in a show of good timing entirely at odds with his usual modus operandi, brought a tray of saké to the table and began to distribute the little cups. "River," He offered his sister a cup and she nodded.

"Please, I would like to partake," She looked at Riddick. The quote ran through her head again, 'the most dangerous man is the one who listens, thinks and observes'. This man was not unobservant or impatient. He seemed to give everything his full attention. He was likely the most dangerous man any of them would ever meet. Even the Operative had not been so dangerous to them as this man. The Operative, for all of his resources and skill had been flawed, had blind spots, crippled by the Parliament, made into the tool in their hand.

Riddick, as she'd noted, wasn't oblivious to her gaze upon him and smiled slowly when she didn't look away. Mal, not entirely comfortable with the byplay between his would be pilot and his Reader, cleared his throat, "So, uh. All crew gets ten percent of the job. Rest of it goes to fuel, parts and supplies.

The conversation flowed around her, Riddick's eyes half on Mal and the crew, half on her and Emma, the type of work Serenity did, crew quarters and the possibility of passengers. Something that sent alarm through Simon and unease through Mal.

"Yeah, we ain't really takin' on passengers much," Mal rubbed the back of his neck in a tell that meant he was uncomfortable. "Last time ended up with a Fed on board and that's somethin' we kinda like to avoid."

"No… I don't mean civilians," Riddick shook his head. "First heard of your ship and crew when I was asking around about passage. Discreet passage. The type that someone like me could use. Kind of passage that isn't useful unless it's kept secret."

River tilted her head and glanced at Mal, a slow smile curving her lips, "Travel accommodations for naughty folk who must sail under the radar. Underground railroad."

Now that Mal understood and his grin matched hers, "If you've got the contacts with folk I can trust around my people…we're all for it."

Riddick nodded and glanced across the tavern to where Jayne had found his whore again, "And that one? You trust him?"

"Jayne's an odd one," Mal conceded. "But so long as he gets paid, he's fairly trustworthy."

Simon had also been looking around and noted what River had, that the tavern was starting to quiet, the staff straightening up in preparation for closing. He glanced at Zoë who nudged the Captain, "Sir. This talk might be better finished elsewhere."

Mal glanced at her and gave the tavern his own once over, nodding. "You feel like you can stand to sail with us, we can try it out until the next rock we hit," He offered.

The newest (probationary) member of the crew grinned, "Let me grab my bag and I'll be right there." He stood and glanced at River who also stood and handed the sleeping Emma over to her mother.

"She will show him to Serenity's berth," She informed Mal quietly. Now she would see if Riddick truly meant what he'd said.


The tavern was situated close to the docks but not so close as to be dangerous. And the boarding house four doors down was a nicer one. Cheap but it wasn't so cheap it was filthy. "Can't stand a place that lets bugs nest in the beds and bathrooms," Riddick commented as he guided her up the stairs to the smallish room he'd rented.

He kept it neat, the bed made, nothing left strewn about. The only sign someone even lived there was a long case under the brass bed and a duffle bag on a small canvas and wood luggage stand.

He closed the door behind her, and she heard the click of the lock, his body crowding hers against the painted wood. Warmth, the scent of saké, clean sweat and the tavern's slightly smoky air clung to his clothes and callused fingers tilted her chin upwards. "Been a long time since I smelled beautiful," He told her, bending his head to hers. "Never seen anyone like you in my life."

"Wants her," River wondered and got one of those lightning grins.

"Like I want water in the desert," He admitted. "How about you?" His lips paused in their motion down to hers, hovering a breath away as he awaited her answer.

"Yes…" She sighed the word. She hadn't gotten caught up in the storm of Jayne's violence and desires this time. The fight had been over quickly once she and Riddick had joined in. That and his blatantly stated interest had been enough to keep her from being overwhelmed, despite the familiarity of Jayne's presence.

For the first time she wanted someone whose emotions hadn't influenced hers, hadn't predisposed her towards accepting his overtures. New and heady, the sensations chased over her as Riddick's breath touched her lips. "Yes please," She grasped the soft fabric of the waffle knit shirt and tried to tug him down towards her.

She may as well have been trying to pull on the moon for all the good it did her, but it was enough for him to move of his own volition. Just a hair more and that mouth pressed to hers, hot, stinging need seeping through her body.

He pulled away and those silver eyes glowed in the dim room, "Damn."

"She is not…" How did she ask if she was any good at kissing? If he'd liked it? Jayne didn't believe in kissing on the mouth. Or anywhere else really. And the last time she'd been kissed she'd been thirteen and the sloppy wet of the boy's mouth had been nothing so inspiring as Riddick's kiss.

"Just so that you know," He cupped her jaw against his palm, his hand feeling huge against her. "In case I go too crazy to say so. You're beautiful. You're sexy. And when I start kissing you again I'm not going to stop until I've put my mouth on every inch of you. I want to hear you scream before, during and after I fuck you River."

"Yes…yes please and thank you," She nodded, feeling a little like an idiot and a lot hot and aching between her thighs. The entire core of her body seemed overheated, spreading to her limbs until she wondered if her skin would split like an overbaked potato. (Simon's cooking was remarkably edifying in certain ways.) For some reason, though technically his words could be interpreted in several ways, she had no doubt Riddick meant she'd be screaming in pleasure.

"Good," His other hand made short work of the lacing down the front of her dress while his mouth pressed to hers again. Hot, dizzying, sensation simply filled her until she could overflow with it. Big hands pushing the skirt of her dress up to her waist, skimming over her thighs and cupping her pì gu while the bodice was pushed down leaving her bare to his eyes. "Damn…you're beautiful."

He lifted her, her weight seemingly nothing to him and brought her to the bed, settling her on it and tugging off her boots, frowning over her bare feet. She caught the brief thought that her feet would be rubbed raw without socks as he set her boots aside and helped her get her dress completely off. That sensual mouth pressed to the plain beige fabric of her panties before he tugged them down her legs and pulled his shirt off.

Her dress, his shirt, and then the rest of his clothing was put over his duffle bag with the care of someone who didn't have so many belongings that he took them for granted. And River took the opportunity to gaze at a magnificent male while he did it.

The man was simply huge. Solid as a cinderblock wall with wide shoulders, strong legs and bulging muscle. Tanned skin, a few scars gilding it here and there but looking mostly smooth to touch. He turned and caught her looking, and just grinned, looking her over with a pleased tilt to his mouth. "Like what you see?"

"He is very attractive… she would like to touch please," Her gaze dipped from his chest to his groin, and she knew her mouth had fallen open a bit. Big everywhere. Bigger than Jayne, not that she'd ever gotten much of a look at Jayne between clothing and haste.

"You let me touch you, and you can touch as much as you like afterwards," Riddick offered as he moved towards the bed.

"Equitable arrangement," River hardly knew what she was saying as he sat down beside her and tugged her into his lap, so she was straddling his thighs and her face was nearly at a height with his. And then his mouth again, taking hers, hot tongue, firm lips. Heat filling her again, damp between her thighs as his hand slid from her spine to her ass and squeezed in appreciation.

Moaning, from her throat, appreciative groans from his, rising need, both of them matched so well… "Oohh…" His mouth traveled from her lips to her throat and down her collarbone to her breasts. One hand bent her spine over his palm, arching her chest up to his mouth gently and she couldn't help reveling in the sensation. He wanted her. Wanted her badly. And maybe it would have been overwhelming in a wonderful way, but she wanted him. She could meet him on the same ground and know her feelings were her own. His lips closed around her nipple, and she gasped and then shuddered when he began to suck, softly and then harder as she panted and tried to get closer.

She could feel his cock rubbing against her, cradled between her thighs and pressing against her clit, her body's moisture dampening his skin. He switched to her other breast, sucking her nipple into his mouth and her hands clenched at his skull hungrily. A low growling groan in his chest, vibrating through them both.

"You feel incredible," Riddick's lips left her skin for a moment. "And I want you just like this, taking my cock, but first… I want to taste you River."

Dazed with sensation, desperate for more, and for a moment confused. He'd kissed her, tasted her skin. He'd sucked on her breasts. What more could he possibly want to… Comprehension as her brain and theoretical knowledge caught up with her body and she felt herself blush deeply. "You… want…"

"I want to eat you alive," Oh that rumbling thunder of a voice sent chills through her in such a good way she didn't ever want him to stop talking. "I want to feel you come as I suck your hot ripe clit River."

Blushing while she was completely naked and straddling him, at the thought of him putting his mouth to her pussy, and she couldn't stop. "Oh…"

Apparently he didn't find blushing a turn off, thank God, Buddha and Allah because Riddick simply smiled and tumbled her onto her back on the bed, knelt between her legs and cupped her ass in his hands. Her legs were draped over his shoulders as if she were light as silk and as she stared he pressed his lips to her pubic bone and inhaled deeply. "Beautiful," His eyes were heavy lidded as he murmured the word before he licked her from her pussy to her clit. "You taste like saké and salt taffy woman," Riddick informed her with a smile before he licked her again, the tip of his tongue finding her clit and drawing a mewl of need and a shudder of pleasure out of her. "I'm going to get drunk off you River."

He was making her drunk with bliss. Her last thought before that amazing mouth licked and sucked and teased until she was begging him (incoherently but still) for him to make her come. Those lips, wrapped around her clit like he'd sucked her nipples, hot and firm and forcing pleasure after pleasure through her skin like osmosis.

As he'd promised, she screamed as she came in hard pulsing waves, and would have jerked against his mouth but for the firm grip of his hands. "Oh…Oh… Oh God! Please…unghh…"

And he pulled her up, into his lap, hands on her hips, mouth on hers, tangy with her own juices as he kissed her hungrily. River reached for him, wrapped her hand around his cock and her reward was a groan of her name into her mouth. "Time to tell me to stop if that's all you want," He pulled his mouth from hers, breathing hard against her shoulder. "I'm clean, but you want, I'll glove up, you want to keep going."

It sounded like a question, and it was and wasn't. River went with her impulse and tugged on the lobe of his ear with her teeth, "Don't stop." She managed to speak somewhat coherently. "Don't want anything between our skin. Please…" Embarrassing (again) to admit ignorance and/or lack of skill but he'd been so patient… maybe he wouldn't mind being patient a little more. "Please…help me…ride you?"

His head jerked up, surprise written across his features, and she wondered about his past that anything about her was surprising. But he nodded and took her mouth again, his hands lifting her body over his, rubbing the thick blunt head of his cock to her pussy and the feel of him was so hot, wide and wonderful, River moaned again and let gravity tug her downward onto him.

"Fuck…" Riddick groaned into her mouth and River gasped as her body slowly stretched around the thick length of him. It wasn't pain…pleasure seemed an odd way to describe it, her body taking his cock in, adapting and accommodating like nothing before. But she couldn't deny how good he felt, sliding up into her, inch by inch… "You're so…fuck…" Another groan and she couldn't help the thrill of satisfaction and joy that she was giving him pleasure, hopefully on par with what he'd given her.

"Oohh…oh… he feels…" She shuddered as the head of his cock came to the end of her, bumping what she knew had to be her cervix and his hands held her hips firmly in place, keeping his body from penetrating her any farther. "Please…" River squirmed in his grip and to her disappointment he lifted her slightly.

"I'll…I'll be careful," His voice had gone raspy with strain. "Don't wanna hurt you." His voice muffled against her neck but clear in his intent.

"Please, more…" With a hard twist of her hips River managed to jerk her body out of his hands and ground down onto his cock until her clit pressed to his pubic bone and the head of his cock pushed hard to her cervix. "Unghh…god…yess…" Panting as the feel of him so deep in her sent another wave of pleasure through her… "Please…" Roll her hips to his and Riddick groaned again, hands tightening on her hips and pulling her more tightly to his body.

"River," The roll of that voice against her skin, a nip of his teeth, presumably to get her attention and she forced her bliss heavy eyes open to meet that silver gaze. "This," He withdrew slightly and pushed back inside her in a sharp hard thrust, jolting her body with pleasure, "Feels good to you?"

"Yes…oh yes," She nodded frantically. "Please… Do it again… So deep, hard in me…so good please…" She didn't have the words for it (astounding considering her brain but not unheard of given her lack of experience in communicative partners), the near electric feeling of his body hitting so deeply inside her. But she knew what felt good and this felt like nothing else except maybe his mouth on her clit.

"Perfect," He muttered and began to move her body to his. Each stroke, he hit the end of her giving her that wonderful feeling of pleasure echoing from her clit hitting his body to his cock thumping hard into her cervix and she couldn't help moaning each time.

The pleasure of it became so overwhelming that she couldn't do anything but moan and cling to him as he moved her and off his cock. "Ohh…oh god… please… I…" She would have buried her face in his neck to muffle her cries, but he wasn't having it, taking her mouth again as she gasped and quivered.

"So good," He muttered against her lips. "Want to feel you come on my cock River. So good…so close…"

"Yes…" He'd nearly tipped her over the edge once or twice but somehow he'd slowed his pace when she got close, much to her dismay. And now she was so desperate for it, every bit of skin sensitized, it wouldn't take much to send her over the edge.

"Good…" He took her mouth again, devoured her, his thumb pressing between their bodies to rub her clit in rough up and down strokes while he slammed her down onto his cock once, twice and she couldn't take it anymore. Hot, wet, contracting tightly around his cock pushing so deep inside her and his groan shook them body he held her so tightly to him as he came after her. Unbelievable pressure and bliss and River felt her body give way, opening to him and milking his body hungrily as she ground against him in pleasure. "Fuck," He shuddered, his arms holding her tightly. "Fuck, that feels…unghh fuck!"

Both of them, panting, sweaty and shuddering with aftershocks, River rested her forehead against his damp shoulder. "Thank you," She knew she sounded uncertain. The etiquette of the aftermath of sex was beyond her experience. Jayne had always pulled out of her and done up his pants once he was done.

Riddick seemed to be the opposite if the way he'd wrapped her in his arms was any indication. She heard (and felt) his chuckle. "Seems like I ought to be saying that to you," He pressed a kiss to her temple. "You're…well, amazing doesn't seem like too strong a word." Gently he lifted her, parting their bodies and laid her back on the bed again. He was so big that reaching for the wash towel and pitcher didn't take much more than an outstretched hand and a slight bend of his torso in that direction.

She watched, bemused, as he dampened the nubby cloth and contrary to her expectations, gently began to wipe the excess of their bodily fluids from her thighs and groin. She must have looked surprised because he shook his head as if in disbelief before pressing a kiss to her belly in a playfully affectionate caress before he cleaned himself up with a bit less care.

When she sat up again, looking at him uncertainly Riddick leaned over and pressed a kiss to her mouth. "You know, with every confused expression on your face I think more and more what an idiot your ex is," He told her with a smile. "But that's his loss."

"He doesn't think so," River shrugged. "Sex with her is desirable because it's free. No other reason. Not even really an ex. Never dated."

"He's a moron." Riddick informed her bluntly. "And if the damn clock didn't say we've only got half an hour before I have to get out of this room I'd prove it all over again; how gorgeous you are."

River sighed as she took in the time, "Serenity leaves in two hours."

"You on duty once we're on the ship?" Riddick stood and pulled on his pants and shirt, bringing her dress over to her and shaking it out as if concerned he'd damaged it somehow.

"No," She shook her head. "Not until twenty one hundred hours."

"Good." He grinned and then it faded as he looked at her face, "Unless you just wanted this to be a one and done kind of deal." He concentrated on the buckles of his boots as if they were of appalling difficulty to clasp as he spoke, "If you don't…like to take you out, hear some music, maybe do some dancing?"

River tilted her head as she held her dress, sifting through his body language and words and the thoughts flying through his mind until she found his actual meaning. "You would like to…go on a date?" She hazarded a guess based upon her conclusions, "Besides tonight?"

"Tonight wasn't a date," He looked up and his expression was so guarded in comparison to five minutes earlier when he was almost tenderly cleaning her body that she might have flinched if she couldn't hear the hope in his mind. "That was just…an outing. Fun. And treating you right and giving you what you needed, what we both wanted, afterwards. Buying you a drink isn't a date."

"Oh," That felt…disappointing. She wouldn't have minded if it had been a date. When she said as much Riddick's wary expression warmed.

"Half a date? Date-ish? Date adjacent maybe?" He offered, "And next time we get shore leave I'll take you on a real date?"

"Would like that," River nodded shyly. "Would also like to make sure…he knows…" She was going to blush again and hoped it wasn't off-putting. "Would be welcome to…"

"You don't want to put off sex until we can have another date," Riddick surmised, and she nodded in relief that he'd taken her meaning.

"Can spend time together and have…casual dates? On Serenity," She offered and got a wider grin.

"Yeah," He nodded. "Gotta admit, I'll probably be counting the minutes until I can get you back in bed." His eyes moved over her still bare skin with a hungry gleam. "And if you don't put your dress on I'll end up paying another day for this room."

River nodded and stood, pulling her dress over her head, and catching the panties that he tossed towards her once she could see again.


The duffle bag didn't just contain clothing. It also held a wig with wavy auburn hair in a cut similar to Simon's, though a bit shaggier, in keeping with living on the Border or Rim. Along with the wig came the sticking gum to hold it on, several different sets of glasses, all with retina masking lenses, contacts and cosmetics suitable to lightening or darkening the skin as well as adding or reducing age lines.

"Didn't want to use any of this tonight," Riddick explained as he put on the wig and added a pair of glasses. "Wasn't sure if Serenity would suit me, or me it. But any cameras catch me coming aboard won't see me, just this big guy who looks like he belongs on a farm havin' his first trip off world."

River nodded, "Very wise." She tilted her head thoughtfully. "The eye shine doesn't bother him in daylight?"

"Had my eyes fixed a while back," He told her. "Still can't see colors much but I can go out in daylight without blinding myself." His smile, mischievous as a little boy's, seemed at odds with the spectacles. "Tell you more about that later." He dug into the duffle and found a length of fabric suitable for a gentleman's cravat and handed it to her. "It's long enough and wide enough that you can use it as a scarf and hood."

"Thank you," River caught the image in his mind and wound her hair into a knot at the base of her neck before adding the improvised scarf to cover her head, neck and shoulders. Feet pushed into her boots and laces firmly tied she watched as Riddick grabbed the gun case from under the bed and slung it over his shoulder.

They left the room with a minute to spare, and Riddick handed the key off to the short no nonsense looking woman with steel wool hair and beady black eyes manning the foyer desk. Thankfully those beady eyes couldn't quite see past the depth of fabric serving as a hood to hide River's face and they left the boarding house no one the wiser as to their identities.

A fast walk, during which Riddick (unlike Jayne or even Mal and Zoë on occasion) remembered to shorten his stride so River wasn't running alongside him, and they were at the docks, dawn only an hour over the horizon. Leading Riddick to Serenity's berth was simplicity in itself and keying in the entry code less than a minute's work.

Simon, Mal, Zoë and Jayne were all waiting in the cargo bay. Jayne took one look at Riddick's disguise and had his gun out to shoot the interloper despite River's unconcern. Riddick took one look at Jayne and then ignored him, taking off his glasses and tucking them into the plaid shirt pocket before addressing Mal, "He always that slow?"

"I'd like to say its only when he's hungover but it's mostly a lie," Mal replied and looked at River. "'Tross, everything all right?"

"Never better," River gave him a beaming smile. "Both up all night and sleep would be welcome after a meal."

"True, you didn't get breakfast," Mal nodded his understanding. "Why don't the two of you get yourselves fed and show him where his bunk'll be." He added half apologetically to Riddick, "It ain't the biggest but it's no smaller than Kaylee's or Jayne's, it's got a locking door and its private."

"I'm sure I've slept in smaller spaces," Riddick waved off that concern.


She hadn't (quite) been prepared for Riddick to ask her if she'd like to join him in his bunk. Had thought maybe he'd want more sex or…her thoughts had stuttered to a stop after that because she couldn't think of anything plausible to come after or.

He'd looked around the bunk, the bed that if he slept at an angle corner to corner might fit him and shrugged. "It's better than a three by ten cell."

River had stood (awkwardly) by the ladder and the sliding door behind it, uncertain of exactly why he'd want her there if not sex. And she could tell that sex wasn't on his mind.

"Gonna tell you something," He sat on the bed and looked at her. "And I don't think you'll like it."

"Doesn't want to date after all?" That had been the first thing to come to her mind and if that wasn't telling she didn't know what was.

"Do I look like my brain fell out of my head between here and the boarding house," He looked like he thought she'd lost her mind. "Of course I do. Damn I like you. You've got spine and brains; you're drop dead sexy, dangerous and gorgeous to boot. Not sure if you'll want to date me is all."

"Richard B Riddick, escaped convict; murderer," She shrugged and he laughed, waving off his criminal record as if it was nothing.

"Nah, figured you knew that." He shook his head, "No. I know that you're a Reader." His gaze, steady; truthful, stayed on her as she stilled, readiness to defend herself filling her limbs. "I'm not here to hurt you. Or buy my freedom with yours. I know your name. I know your brother's name. Lots of ships looking for pilots and gun hands. I picked Serenity because I knew if you and Simon were here, it'd be safe for me too."

This was (as Mal might say) a puzzler. Was she that well known in the criminal underworld that he'd heard of her and her brother and her abilities? It didn't make sense. Painful to admit but she had to confess, "I don't understand."

"I was on Osiris about two…maybe two and a half or three years ago," Riddick said quietly. "Even the criminal underground doctors are better than average there. That's when I got my eyes fixed. And when I was recovering I worked with a group that kind of…worked underneath the Alliance. As in, developed work arounds so they could survive the law and all the lā jī that goes along with the law on a Core world."

"Simon's Underground," River murmured. It was so rare she was surprised. But Riddick seemed to manage it quite a bit so far.

"Yeah… the criminal element doesn't like the government takin' folks to experiment on any more than law abiding folks do. Difference is the criminal element has more contacts and skills and just might be able to do something about it," Riddick nodded. "And when someone like your brother gets arrested for being in a Black Out zone…well it attracts attention from all sorts."

"You didn't have anyone in the Academy though," River tilted her head.

"No," He shook his head. "No, a couple of people I knew did. A few others were able to get plans for the place, parts anyway. Me, they needed my expertise with a ship and my knack for being able to escape any slam. You might say it's a sort of…specialized knowledge."

"Could be lying," River theorized though she knew it wasn't correct. It simply felt wrong.

"You know it's true because you know I'm a man of my word," Each syllable practically burned with sincerity, those silver eyes blazing as he met her gaze. "I make a deal, I keep it. A deal isn't broken with me until someone else breaks it. And I promise, I will never give you or this crew and ship up to the Alliance."


He'd coaxed her into moving closer (after that declaration of intent she couldn't disbelieve him) and wrapped his arms around her waist again, tugging her body to press against his. And suggested they get some sleep. She'd been ready to go back to her bunk, but he'd just begun removing her boots and dress and suggested they both sleep right there. Together. That he would trust her beside him when had no way of knowing her thoughts or intentions bewildered her. One more surprise.

Five hours later she'd woken up with a wave of pleasure rolling over her as Riddick brought her to a skillful moaning orgasm with his mouth and fingers. After which she'd practically begged him to fuck her.

Missionary position had been just as enjoyable as riding him. And she'd have been perfectly happy to try multiple other positions but hunger (and Mal's demands on the comm system that everyone come and eat) had overruled that desire.

Riddick had laughed and commented that the timing could be worse. "Believe you," She told him before she'd hurried out. "Man of his word." And his bright flash of a grin in response. River had taken five minutes to show him where the head was and (daringly for her) pressed a quick kiss to his mouth before climbing into a vent where she could navigate her way down to her dorm and change before lunch.

It had been highly gratifying to have Riddick's eyes go immediately to her legs and then her (according to Jayne nonexistent) cleavage. She hadn't chosen her work clothes with the idea of drawing male eyes. The thick stretchy denim pants, double layered tee-shirts, belt and boots were practical and easy for her to move in, plus they had the advantage of being cheap and easy to find. (Disregarding that half of her clothes came from the children's section of the cheap stores that hadn't heard of petite as a measurement.)

He'd also seemed pleased when she took a seat beside him at the table, "Plannin' to let the rest of 'em know. Just figured it was only fair you know first." He muttered quietly.

That was appreciated. All too often everyone around her didn't bother to vocalize something because they knew she heard everything. No one ever took into account how loud all those thoughts could get. Or that she might miss something. Or even that she might like to hear people saying what they thought she should hear. Now and then Mal remembered but he was often busy.

"Words…make thoughts solid, real," She smiled at Riddick. "She appreciates that you say them." And that got her a firm kiss on the mouth. Much to Jayne's disgust.

"Rì shāo gǒu shǐ bǐng," The gun hand swore as he entered the galley. "Mal?"

"That's right, you never did get introduced," Mal brought the food to the table while Zoë got Emma into her chair.

"Too busy acting like a fèi wù qīngwā qí de húndàn," Simon commented as he escorted Kaylee into the galley.

For that, Jayne sneered and thumped his way to his chair, "Ain't heard anyone complainin' before." He nodded at Zoë respectfully, grinned at the baby and rolled his eyes as Simon held Kaylee's chair for her.

"Complaints not made in his hearing are still complaints," River said quietly. "But it is not relevant at this time."

"Jayne, your mouth is talkin' again, look to that," Mal ordered as he began to dish out lunch. "Anyway, what with all the excitement—"

"Bar fight," River corrected him as she took her bowl of noodles and protein.

"Yeah that," Mal nodded. "And then we jumped right into talkin' about the job. Never got around to introductions."

River watched as Riddick leaned back in his chair, silver eyes catching the light as he looked around the room, "Well I know the beauty to my right is River Tam. That's her brother next to her, Doctor Simon Tam. His lady, Kaywinnet Lee Frye, ship's engineer. Then we got Jayne Cobb, gun hand, specializes in tracking." He glanced to his left and nodded at Zoë, "Zoë Washburne, First Mate, probably the most dangerous person on the boat besides River and me. Your daughter, Emma. And Captain Malcolm Reynolds."

"River filled you in when she escorted you to the docks," Simon inquired a bit nervously and River shook her head.

"No," Riddick shook his head. "No, I looked for all of you." He met Mal's eyes and then looked at Simon, "Took me a while to track you down. I wasn't sure where you ended up after Garcia got you to Persephone."

"Gar-Garcia…" Simon stuttered over the name.

"Simon," Mal's calm, everything-is-going-to-hell-in-a-handbasket-but-I-won't-lose-my-mind tone of voice cut through the air.

"Garcia is the name of the man who contacted Simon about getting me out of the Academy," River supplied the information as Simon stared at Riddick and finally spoke.

"They never—"

"Never mentioned me?" Riddick chuckled, "Garcia looked pretty harmless…he was the best face for the operation. I don't exactly…" He gestured at himself. "Inspire trust."

"So…how were you…involved," River's brother was still trying to wrap his brain around the idea that Riddick, a notorious escaped convict, had helped the Underground break his sister out.

"Who do you think figured your way out?" Riddick smirked, "Garcia could get you the credentials, the uniform and the bouncing betty, but he didn't have any experience in escaping slams." He paused, "And make no mistake, that was a Slam they put her in. Only difference is, she didn't commit any crime." He shrugged, "'Course, neither did I but that's beside the point. He got you in. I figured your way out. Programmed the ship. And piloted the ship that took you both to Persephone. Lost track of you after that. But that was the point."

"It was," Simon looked at River in the way that everyone on the crew would, asking silently that she verify the truth of Riddick's story.

River swallowed her broth and put her chopsticks down. "Telling the truth. Was instrumental in planning the exfil portion of the escape."

Mal was regarding Riddick with a thoughtful expression that could be good or bad, "So you knew what River could do when you came up to her in the bar."

"Yeah," Riddick nodded. "Could say I've got a bad habit of keeping myself to myself. Until I decide not to." He looked at River, "And I knew she'd find out anyway, minute I thought about it. Told her last night. Figured she deserved to be the first to know."

Mal sat back and regarded Riddick and River sitting next to him, "And this…" He motioned between the two of them. "What's this?"

"Captain dislikes romance on his boat," River murmured for Riddick's edification.

"Hmm…" That roll of thunder voice filled with amusement. "Well I don't know romance from rotini but I like her a helluva lot. She seems to like me back well enough. Don't see how it's anyone else's business so long as the boat runs smooth."

River giggled and got a round of irritated looks, "Stole the Captain's line."

Mal sighed and began to eat his noodles, "Yeah well, see that it don't interfere." He pointed a chopstick at Riddick, "You're on the bridge with River. Working." He emphasized, "At twenty-one hundred. River, you give him the rundown on how things work."

"Of course," River nodded. "Will give him a tour of the boat after lunch."

"Well, we're headed to Beaumonde and after that Whitehall," Mal informed them. "Picked up cargo and there's rumors the twins might have a job."

"And let's not fall back into any bad habits," Zoë cautioned with a look at River.

River frowned and at her noodles and protein. Why did they assume it was something she wanted? The first time it had happened she'd been unprepared, caught up in a tornado of violent emotions and then sensations… Jayne had simply seen that she was in the same state he was and done what came naturally to him. He'd begun to take her for granted and been miffed when she'd stopped coming out.

"Excuse me," She stood and left the galley, conscious of Jayne snagging her bowl to devour her noodles.


Ballet always cleared her mind. Toe shoes and first position, second, third, grand plie, demi plie, until she was sufficiently warmed up and it was safe to dance. Swan Lake suited her mood and the music was easy to find.

When she was done, sitting on the steps and breathing hard as she wound down, she could feel Riddick watching her, moving closer, down the steps from the catwalk, soundless but undeniably present.

"So that's the sort of dancing you like," He sat down next to her, and she could feel his desire to put an arm around her shoulders. In answer to it she scooted closer and rested her head on his bicep.

"I love ballet. I love the movement, the discipline," She murmured as he put his arm around her. "The Academy…they took ballet and…weaponized it. Taught me to fight. Corrupted everything beautiful about it." She sighed, "I hate fighting. Martial arts blended with ballet and everything they taught me takes over when the violence starts. Bad habits lead to late nights ending alone."

"She really pissed you off, why?" Riddick at least was asking instead of assuming he understood. The benefit of not knowing her for a year of insanity.

"Implied that it was by choice that I took up with Jayne," River shook her head. "She and her husband, when I wasn't stable…I felt them, touching, kissing on the bridge and it just…swept over me. It filled me." She pushed a strand of hair out of her face, "When the fights would start…the violence of it…it would fill me, overwhelm me, push the programming to start, and I would defend my crew."

"And when Jayne was involved?" His question held no judgement, just a need to understand.

"It must be understood, Jayne loves a good fight, loves winning, it's like…foreplay for him," River frowned. "And that feeling…it was so strong, especially when he's fighting…it fills me, surrounds me and it's like being surrounded by a typhoon. I can't feel anything else. I only know how to go too far."

"So, it's not what you want, it's what he wants and it's just echoing in you?" Riddick sounded appalled and angry at the thought.

"Somewhat," She shrugged. "I have no way to hold it out. And giving in to it…it cleanses…like sex makes the blood spilled less violent. Less… not me somehow. It's only when it's all over and he would leave that it felt wrong."

"And with me?" His mind was full of how responsive she'd been, how wonderful and now he wondered if any of it had been her own feelings or just a reflection of his own.

"First time I felt anything of my own," River looked up at him. "Wasn't overwhelmed because I felt as much for you as you did for me. Desire, passion, need…your feelings and thoughts don't explode out of you."

"And you'll tell me if that changes," Stern, that thunderous voice adamant, resolved.

"I will," She nodded simply.

"But that's why you don't like fighting," He surmised. "You get overwhelmed with everything and it takes over, so you don't have a choice. You have to fight."

"Yes," She sighed. "Guns…I'm just as good, it's easier somehow…over quickly. I can't look, try to close my eyes and aim quickly. Center shots every time. Aim for their thoughts."

"Sparring? Is that any fun?"

"No one to spar with," River shook her head.

"That might be part of the problem," He murmured thoughtfully and when she gave him a quizzical look shrugged at her. "How can you get used to the feeling if you don't ever get to practice?" His hand cupped the back of her skull, and he drew her in for a gentle kiss. "Spar with me. Let's see if you still hate fighting when it's just an exercise."

"Okay," She nodded. "Tomorrow?"

"Yeah, first thing before breakfast," Riddick grinned. "This'll be fun."


Six months…she'd all but moved in with Riddick. They'd bought a bed that could hold two people and she'd moved her things into the crew bunk. She and Riddick sparred every day they had the time. It hadn't solved the problem completely but between getting used to how the programming felt and having Riddick beside her to focus her thoughts on him, she didn't get swept up in that typhoon nearly so often.

He might not claim to completely understand her, but he asked. He gave her the courtesy of speaking his thoughts. And he started getting on anyone else who expected her to just read their minds.

And he might think she didn't know, but he'd read Zoë and Mal the riot act about her 'bad habits'. Telling them what she'd explained to him, that she didn't get much choice with all those emotions overwhelming her. And that if they didn't like her behavior maybe they ought to think about what she might be hearing or feeling that she acted that way.

"Hey gorgeous, how's it going up here," Her lover's growl of thunder voice asked affectionately. No one ever heard him take a step he was so silent. But she could feel his presence coming closer to her.

"No worries," She gave him a smile.

"Good." He pressed a kiss to her hair and sat beside her. "By the way, figured you noticed but I'm pretty partial to you." He didn't say 'I love you' but he gave her statements that felt the same way.

"Noticed," River smiled wider. "Feel pretty partial to you too." Riddick wasn't flowery. He'd very flatly told Simon that he wouldn't know romance if he sat in it. And she didn't know if this was love. It didn't feel like what was between Simon and Kaylee or what she'd felt between Wash and Zoë. But what she felt between her and Riddick was strong and honest and unwavering. Not all love was the same.

"Glad to hear that," He gave her one of those lightning smiles she loved to see flash across his face.

"Finished schooling Jayne," She tilted her head. Riddick had taken to sparring with Jayne now and then. A process that almost always led to the gun hand swearing never again.

"Yeah," He smirked. "One of these days he'll get a clue and realize that he can say no to sparring and he won't have the bruises. But I guess I owe him a little bit."

"How?" She couldn't fathom why Riddick would owe Jayne anything.

"Well, that bad habit he got you into… led me to you," Riddick smiled wider, and she couldn't help the happy smile that curved her lips in return. He was right. Though she'd like to think they'd have gotten to the same place eventually.

"Best possible result," River nodded and set the autopilot before she climbed into his lap. "Grateful for him."

"Grateful for you too," He kissed her, hot and sweet. "You get off shift and I'll show you how much." Riddick's mind open to hers as anyone else should she go looking, filled with images of her, reading, dancing, learning to cook, flying and drawing, sleeping cuddled against him. And the last thought filled him with such warmth, contentment, and joy she couldn't help but smile.

She didn't know if the rest of the crew would call it love, what she felt for Riddick, what he felt for her. But she'd never been like anyone else and she'd never met anyone like Riddick. Who cared what they called it. "My bad habits lead to you," She murmured and pressed another kiss to his mouth. She would take the happiness she had and guard it. "Be with me."

"I'm with you," An open, unguarded expression she only saw when he was with her. "And you're with me." A statement, surety, certainty, not arrogance, he knew her, and she knew him.

"I'm with you Riddick," River promised softly. "I'm with you."

That lightning fast smile that never failed to charm her. Yes. She would take hold of this and guard it like the treasure it was to her, to them. This fire…this fire between them wouldn't burn out. Bad habit… yes…and she might have taken the long way 'round to get here but it had led to him, and she would never regret it.


Author's Note: This is what happens after a couple of old fics (not mine) get tangled in my head, I hear a song on the radio over and over, and I think 'what if River didn't like fighting'. Hope you all enjoyed it.

Chinese Translations:

pì gu (butt)

È yǒu 'èbào (evil has its retribution (idiom); to suffer the consequences of one's bad deeds / sow the wind and reap the whirlwind - Hosea 87)

zǒu dé hěn yuǎn hěn kuài (Go far away very fast)

lā jī; (trash / refuse / garbage / (coll.) of poor quality) or Taiwan lè sè (Garbage, trash)

Rì shāo gǒu shǐ bǐng (Pile of sun-baked dog poo / Japanese shit cake)

fèi wù (good for nothing)

qīngwā qí de húndàn (frog riding bastard)

Quote Sources:

Be like water – Bruce Lee

Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one. – Bruce Lee

The most dangerous man is the one who listens, thinks and observes – Bruce Lee

The essence of fighting is the art of moving at the right time. – Bruce Lee

Be water. Empty your mind, be formless, be shapeless like water. – Bruce Lee

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