(Day 2 – Home recovery)
Garak was in shock. What was happening? He honestly wasn't sure. He had been caught off guard by Bashir's warm hand as it had touched his face, not knowing how to interpret his companion's affection or where he was going with all of this. It had taken what control he had not to flinch as he'd sensed the approaching digits, hopefully the Doctor hadn't noticed. The young man was naturally very easy and open with his tactility. Was he just being kind and offering friendly physical contact? Trying to ease the sting of his inevitable rejection, perhaps? The good Doctor had never been able to bear witness to the pain of others, he was much too gentle and soft-hearted for that. Garak contemplated that he shouldn't be surprised at such a typically Federation manoeuvre; it was in Bashir's nature to genially preserve the peace despite personal obstacles or misunderstandings.
Garak's eyes had widened as Bashir leaned in further to tenderly explore the ridges along his jawline before he'd followed the line of scales up to and around his ears. Was he mistaken, then? Could it be possible that the Doctor would consider entering into a partnership with him? The sensation of those elegant fingers slipping into his hair to pull him closer had almost been his undoing. However, it wasn't until his felt the press of golden skin against his chufa that he finally surrendered to the moment and closed his eyes.
The sweet scent of the Doctor was all encompassing at this proximity, and Garak could almost taste a change in the air as they gravitated towards each other. He found himself happy to comply with whatever clemency he was being granted, temporary or not. The Order would kill untold numbers to possess a drug this potent and effective; he had been entirely compromised. Once Bashir's mouth ghosted across his own, Garak stopped worrying and simply allowed himself to feel.
Julian had been feather-light with his kiss. Prompted, in no small part, by Garak's body language which had initially seemed nervous and skittish. Fortunately, he hadn't drawn away from him yet which was encouraging. He certainly wasn't going to be forceful with his advances, the last thing he wanted to do was create any sort of pressure.
Julian didn't know where Garak's head was right now. For two talkative people, they both seemed to be particularly poor at communicating on this subject. He didn't want to start guessing and making assumptions that they were on the same page. Plus, his knowledge of Cardassian courting was severely limited. Did they kiss in the human way? Hopefully he hadn't managed to offend Garak with his actions, that wouldn't be the best start.
Garak smiled against the Bashir's lips. They were still huddled together on the sofa, sat nose to nose. Neither of them had moved a muscle. The Doctor was starting to look concerned for him again and Garak almost rolled his eyes. Wanting to reassure his companion that he was fully compliant in this joint endeavour, he easily broke his wrist free of Bashir's hold and brought up both of his hands. Garak cupped the Doctor's delicate face and tilted it forward so he could apply a kiss to his forehead. He knew that Bashir didn't possess any Chu'en of his own but felt compelled to lavish attention to the unadorned area anyway, he wished to pay homage to the mental centre that he so admired. Pleased with his work, he dragged his ridged nose over the Doctor's distinguished features until their mouths were aligned once more.
Garak met Bashir's eyes, noting the clear dilation of his pupils. The deep hazel colour looked richer in this moment than he'd ever seen it. Dropping his left arm, he moved to wrap it securely around the Doctor's back. As he followed Bashir's earlier example, he took great delight in raking the nails of his other hand through the downy human hair. It was softer and more malleable than he'd thought. The heat coming from his companion's head was also a surprise, he really was a life-sized hot water bottle! Pausing just for a second, Garak focused on the cacophony of sound created by their thundering heartbeats and impatient breathing. Humming in contentment at this truly unexpected turn of events, he drew the Doctor in and kissed him soundly. He'd long ago given up hope of being able to indulge himself in this way. Not that the unlikeliness of the event had stopped him from imaging this moment numerous times over the years.
Julian couldn't help but moan as Garak took the lead, his cooler scales were almost rough against his own skin. His heart leapt in his chest at the fact that this was finally happening. Not only was this happening, but it felt incredible. Everywhere they connected sparked with heated electric energy, each touch and caress triggering its own cascading chemical reaction. He matched Garak's intensity and hauled him even closer, using his grip on his waist and the nape of his neck for leverage.
Julian found himself overwhelmed that Garak seemed to be as enthralled and caught up as he was, glad that this wasn't as one-sided as he'd feared. He wondered if Garak was also feeling a similar sense of rightness, as if he were home at last. They seemed to fit and mould together so perfectly; it was odd to think that they hadn't been doing this all along. What on Earth had they been waiting for?!
Julian was in need of more direct contact and tilted himself backwards, dragging Garak down on top of him. The pair of them ended up sprawled lengthways across his sofa, barely stopping their mapping of each other's bodies to register the shift. The feeling of Garak's weight above him was exquisite. Julian was pleased to note that from this angle he could easily wrap his legs around the glorious Cardassian and cheekily drew his knees together to illustrate the point. Growing in confidence, he simultaneously snuck his hands up to Garak's neck ridges and started to apply pressure to his scales. Julian knew exactly where to direct his attention, having memorised all the most sensitive spots on his last examination. He smugly noted the hitch in Garak's breathing and revelled in the honesty and openness of their physical reactions to each other.
Garak growled low in the back of his throat as he found himself straddling the good Doctor and leaned down to capture his lips again with the full strength of his previously withheld passion. Nimbly reaching around those teasing thighs, he found what he was looking for and took hold of the man's pert backside, giving the muscles a firm squeeze. He couldn't help but grind down as he pulled Bashir tightly against his hips. The Doctor wasn't the only one who could fight dirty. Bashir somehow arched up from his position beneath him in response and tilted his head, deepening the kiss.
Garak groaned, his eyes almost rolling back in his head as he finally got to taste the Doctor. He marvelled at the bold and dominant move by the usually gentle man. Bashir was like water sometimes, moving in the most unexpected of ways. Not wanting to be outdone, Garak slid his tongue between the soft lips of his companion and began his own fervent mission of exploration.
Julian eventually pulled himself back from the embrace, needing a moment of air. Garak seemed to be watching his every move intently, those sharp blue eyes bored into his very soul. He dearly hoped his friend was satisfied with his findings and wasn't still waiting for the other shoe to drop. There was surely no room left for interpretation?
Unable to stop the growing smile on his face, Julian thought he'd better test the water to be safe and made eye contact with Garak. "Are you alright?"
Garak smirked, raising a ridge at the absurdity of the question. "Oddly, Doctor, I find myself to be doing better than alright."
Julian shifted uncomfortably at the use of his title. He had always enjoyed the way Garak called him 'my Dear' and normally he wouldn't have an issue with 'Doctor' or 'my dear Doctor" either, but in all honesty, he didn't enjoy hearing it now in these more intimate settings. He never had. Medical roleplay wasn't something that he had ever really been interested in, he took his job and responsibilities too seriously to be flippant with it. Gathering his nerve, he decided to tackle the issue head on. It would be best to start as he meant to go on, after all.
Julian bit his lip, suddenly feeling awkward. "Garak? Could I ask that you call me Julian? I'm not overly fond of being referred to as 'Doctor' whilst so intimately engaged."
Garak nodded in understanding; he could read the unease in Bashir's face. "I think I follow you. Although, it might take some time to get used to. On Cardassia, comparative rank and status is key to most of our interactions. First names are rarely used except by those closest to us."
Julian smiled; he was glad that Garak would at least try to make the effort. He would be lying if he said he hadn't thought about Garak referring to him by his given name in that smouldering voice of his. Before he could respond, another thought occurred to him. He half recalled something that had happened yesterday. Wanting to reassure Garak, Julian tiled his head is his direction and held his gaze. "Thank you. I also don't want you to worry, I won't use yours without your consent."
Garak was stunned, he'd almost forgotten the Doctor's slip of the tongue last night as they'd gone to bed. The only person likely to have offered up such personal information was Enabran Tain, presumably in an attempt to weaken their trust of each other. He'd always seen any positive relationship in Garak's life as a dangerous threat. Guls forbid that his son have any life of his own beyond dutifully serving the state. As soon as Tain met Bashir, he would have known how susceptible Garak would be to the bright and fearless human doctor's charms. Garak had always been drawn towards what he couldn't have. He had a particular weakness for kindness in others, the sentiment ensnared and confused him in equal parts. They say that opposites attract, and the good Doctor was as far away from him as he could get.
Garak dipped his head; he didn't want to dwell on the past or think about Tain any more than he had to. He was no longer under any obligations and could pursue anyone he wanted without having to constantly look over his shoulder. Well, no more than usual anyway. Some habits would admittedly be harder to break than others. With some coaching, he could easily bring the Doctor up to speed and advise him what to look out for and who to be wary of. His companion had a knack for picking things up at an alarming rate, Garak would bet that he was easily the most intelligent person that he'd ever encountered. On that topic, was he overthinking? Bashir could had simply puzzled this out on his own. Garak wasn't sure what he'd revealed while he was going through withdrawal, his name could have been thrown in there somewhere for all that he could remember. He hadn't exactly had his wits about him at the time.
As Garak looked back into the hopeful and accepting eyes of the man he cherished above all others, he came to a surprising conclusion. "My dear Julian. You can call me by my first name if you wish to. Although, I would stipulate that it only be used when we are alone and in the privacy of our quarters."
Julian broke out in a wide grin; he was practically beaming. He never would have guessed that Garak would be this comfortable with him to allow such a liberty. The statement also seemed to suggest that this wasn't going to be a one-time event which he was relieved about. He hadn't been sure how to approach the topic of their longevity, given there were many things they'd both have to consider and figure out before properly committing to each other. His own decision, in that regard, has been resolutely settled in his mind a long time ago. He wanted to share everything he could with his enigmatic and endlessly frustrating friend. He'd always envisioned them walking their looping and separate paths together; determinedly and emphatically side by side.
Julian was unable to resist trying the name on for size and moved closer to whisper in Garak's ear. "I will bear that in mind, my dear Elim. I've single-handedly borne the knowledge thus far, there's no need for anyone else to know… Well, Kukalaka also knows now, I suppose. But he's always been rather good at keeping things to himself. A trait that has made him such an invaluable companion to me over the years. He keeps all of my secrets safe, and now he'll keep yours too."
Garak couldn't help but chuckle at the thought that this was his life now, looking after the foolish and brilliant Julian Bashir. Being silly just for silliness' sake. It was going to take some getting used to, but he knew that things would certainly never be dull. Taking in the sight of his beautiful companion, he already felt lighter and freer. He may never again feel the sunlight of Cardassia on his scales, but he could spend his days basking in the warm glow of the good Doctor's light and call himself content with his lot.
Garak placed his hand affectionately on the Doctor's chest, where his chula would be. "I will do my best to keep you and any secrets that you carry safe. Kukalaka's too if needs be. You are my family, Julian. I don't expect you to know the full weight of that statement to a Cardassian, but I need you to understand. Where you go, I go. Your enemies are now my enemies. My home is here, by your side and at your back."
Julian brought his palm up to rest on Garak's central chest ridge, his eyes full of emotions that he couldn't speak aloud just yet. "You're stuck with me now, Dearest. I will take care of us both if you'll let me. I know things aren't always going to be smooth sailing, but I'm in this for as long as you'll have me. You are my priority, and nothing is going to change that."
-The End-
"…What about helping me with my book, and making a start on the next? Have you thought of an ending?"
"Yes, several, and all are dark and unpleasant," said Frodo.
"Oh, that won't do!" said Bilbo. "Books ought to have good endings. How would this do: and they all settled down and lived together happily ever after?"
"It will do well, if it ever comes to that," said Frodo.
J.R.R. Tolkien, The Lord of the Rings
Author's Notes:
I had originally intended to have a steamier ending, but this story took on a life of its own and turned out so sweet that I ended up keeping it in the same spirit as the rest.
Thank you so much for reading! If you stuck with me this far, I hope you liked it and that it was worth taking the time to read through. I love these two idiots together.
As always, any comments would be much appreciated x
