AAYLA SECURA
"Our saviour is here!", "She came!", "Glory to the hero of Ryloth". Such were the shouts of the people standing on the sides of the road, when republic forces came into the village after destroying the separatist force occupying it. Aayla was in the front of the unit, seemingly leading other soldiers. Everyone was lookinng at her, full of hope and adoration. In response she was waving to them, giving them a confident smile. It only made their shouts more intense, as they saw her savior acting as if she had everything under control.
Things however looked differently from Aayla's point of view. She was really embarrased and worried at the moment. And she knew who was to blame for her predictament.
It was of course all Banemi's fault! If not for him, something like that wouldn't happen at all!
Ever since the ghost showed up with a proposition of aid, Aayla's life became increasingly chaotic. It was true that Banemi was incredibly useful on Ryloth, with both his ability to spy on separatist forces unnoticed and suprisingly vast knowledge about lightsaber techniques, one he would sometimes share with her. It was all very beneficial for her and the troops, so she couldn't really complain, despite the man's constant frivolity. The problem however, was that he wanted something in exchange.
And it was something that lead Aayla to her current predictament. For some reason he wanted Aayla to "act like a hero". It was already quite an unusual demand, but as if it wasn't enough, he even insisted on giving her lessons about how to do it properly!
She could still remember the shame she felt when several clones entered her room to ask her something, only to see her practice a victory pose in front of the mirror! They didn't even comment on her actions, only apologizing for the interruption and leaving her room! It was so embarrasing! It was all Banemi's idea, not her!
She could complain about Banemi and his insane demands for days. But the worst part was that all that "acting like a hero" actually worked. News about her deeds spread quickly through Ryloth, making it much easier for republic forces to recieve aid from locals. It came to the point that even villages, like the one she was in, recognized her on sight, praising her name and promising to support Republic.
It was the thing she had the most issues with. She knew it was beneficial for both her and the republic forces for locals to trust her. It was even good for people of Ryloth, as they finally had someone to believe in, helping them prevail in these hard times.
She also knew that her status as a local hero would speed up the process of liberating Ryloth, ending the separatist opression much sooner than anyone expected.
It all however felt like a deception of the highest proportions. She wasn't a hero. She was a jedi, a sworn protector of the Republic. She of course fully intended to free Ryloth, but only because it was her duty. She would do the same for any planet that needed her help. It didn't feel right for her to be called a hero when she only did what she had to do.
The most worrying part however was that some part of her actually enjoyed the admiration of the people. These people needed someone to believe in and they chose her. It made her feel more confident and determined, knowing how many people depended on her. It was a pleasant feeling.
Aayla however knew that it was a path that lead to temptation. Jedi shouldn't take pleasure from others approval after all. She had to remember that, as she knew these unwanted emotions she was experiencing could make her fall into the dark side if she wasn't careful.
Her companion however didn't seem to understand why she was so conflicted. Banemi was floating next to her, looking like he was lying on air with hands behind his head. And yet he was still moving, keeping pace with her. And at the moment he was looking at her like she was an idiot. How rude.
"You think about it too much" he said, floating closer to her. He didn't seem to understand the danger of vanity. He was always so frivoulous, taking everything in stride. She still was unsure if she considered it endearing or just irritating. "You get a nice confidence boost and these people get their hero, someone who would give them hope. Is it really so bad?"
She couldn't see any deception in his eyes, which meant he was serious. How absent-minded he had to be not to see the obvious dangers of such a behavior?!
"It's shameful to act like some sort of saviour of these people when I am only doing my duty! Something that every clone and officer here does as well! And I am a jedi! I can't let myself become vain, craving the adoration of people! It's a first step of the path leading to my fall!" She exclaimed, intensely though quietly. She was leading the forces through the village, observed by numerous celebrating locals, so she couldn't just scream at Banemi for his irresponsible words, no matter how much she wanted to do it at the moment.
Hearing her words, Banemi got up from his lying position and landed on the ground (or at least acted like he did, as she was sure he wasn't actually touching the ground with his feet). He looked her in the eye and moved his hand to flick her in the forhead. Predictably, his finger passed through it, as Banemi was only a ghost, unable to actually touch her. She undestood the meaning of his action though.
"It would have worked better if I was alive" he said, clicking his tongue. He looked at her seriously, making him look much different than his usual carefree self. There was a weight in his gaze. "I have a feeling you don't actually know much about jedi teachings. Or maybe something changed since my times, I don't know. There is nothing actually forbiding jedi from feeling emotions and from doing things that would bring them joy. Just look at me. I was a hero, known practically everywhere. And I won't lie to you, I loved every second of it, as it felt so good to be loved by everyone around me"
That was a dangerous statement, but she said nothing. Mostly because Banemi gave her a smile. It wasn't a happy one, though she wouldn't call it sad either. It was...peaceful smile, if that made any sense.
"Now no one remembers me or my deeds. And it's fine. Remember, no one should demand of you to silence your emotions completely. Repression won't lead to anything good after all. You must be however ready let go of your feelings and emotions when the time comes. Don't cling to your popularity and adoration, but enjoy it while you can. That's my advice" he said, giving her another smile, happy one this time.
That was...actually quite wise. She didn't expect him to say something so profound. But it actually made sense. It was hard to remember because of his constant frivolity, but the man in front of her was actually a spirit of powerful and experienced jedi master, full of ancient wisdom. She would have to keep it in mind.
Suddenly Banemi clapped, startling Aayla from her thoughts.
"Okay, now that we dealt with your concerns of spiritual nature, time for more important things" he exclaimed, looking at Aayla. What was he talking about? "We are nearing the village square. Prepare to make a victory pose no. 5, just like we practiced. Remember, raise lightsaber above your head and put another hand on your hip. Don't forget to bend a little to the side for the best effect!" He became excited, explaining everything and even doing the pose himself, so that she would see how it should look.
Aayla had to reevaluate her previous opinion. Maybe he was just insane.
