Stupid deaths! Stupid deaths! They're funny cause it's true!
WOO!
Stupid death! Stupid death! Hope next time it's not you!
HEHE!
"Uh! Looks like I got a new shift today with doing FICTIONAL characters this time around. Oh! What will they think of next?" Death asked one of the skeletons named Louie. "Oh shut up, Louie. NEXT!" He called out while pulling out a scroll.
A mafia boss entered the room with orange hair, a bowler hat and feather inside, and green eyes, and was wearing a white trench coat over a shirt and scarf. He wore long black pants and shoes with gloves and buckled sleeves. He was carrying a cane with him, that doubled as a weapon.
"And here we go. And you are?" Death asked him.
"My name is Roman Torchwick, a high-class mafia boss from Roosterteeths RWBY." He answered.
"Oh goodie, goodie. I might have a good run on this after all. Let me guess, you died on the streets by some creepy monsters, thinking you can take them?" Death asked him.
"Nope! I died like a man while fighting a 15-year-old little red of a girl." Torchwick said.
"Oooh! A little sexist there, but you dying from a teenager who's going through puberty? That's funny. So tell me, how did you die?" Death asked him.
"Well, it all started when me and my colleagues commenced an invasion at Beacon Academy, bringing the place down to search for a person that Cinder Fall was so interested in. My task was to lead the White Fang, and the Creatures of Grimm as a distraction. All was going well…until that brat, Ruby Rose, got in the way on a hijacked airship with me and my right-hand woman, Neo on board." Torchwick explained.
"Let me guess, Neo bit the dust before you did?" Death asked.
"No, she was blown away off the ship, and thanks to her umbrella on hand, she had a safe landing. Mere moments later, I died." He said.
"Go on!" Death demanded in a begging voice.
"Angered and saddened, I started attacking Ruby, saying that I will continue to do what I do best: lie, steal, cheat, and survive. Ironically…" He was trying to say.
"And?!" Death said while leaning closer over his desk.
"I had an anticlimactic death when a Grimm called a Griffon ate me alive the second, I said 'survive.'" He finished.
"BAAAAAAA HAHAHA HAAAA HA HAAAA!" Death screamed while laughing his lungs out. "You became bird chow to a giant, mutant bird!? You really did 'flew the coop' on that last part! Hahaha! That's three 'yes's,' you're through to the afterlife. Off you go." Death said while calming down.
"Well, thank you. You best pray that I don't catch you again. Or I'll blast you with Melodic Cudgel!" Torchwick threatened.
"HA! Joke's on you! I'm already dead, hence my name 'Death.'" He said before laughing more, and Torchwick entered the doors to the afterlife, vanishing in the process. "Ah…this was a good idea. A little change in pace. Just like the last gig, sometimes, I love this job. I do! I really do." He finished while going back to his scroll. "NEXT!" He shouted.
A man wearing knight armor entered the room. He had slightly long hair and was holding a shield in an arm that had an emblem with a large red cross on it, as well as his tunic. He wore brown gloves and boots and had a scabbard on his belt.
"And who are you?" Death asked him.
"I am Sir Galahad of Camelot, a knight of King Arthur and the round table from the 1977 film, Monty Python and the Holy Grail." Galahad answered.
"Ooo! A knight, you say? Now we're getting somewhere. Tell me, you died from a stupid battle?" Death asked him.
"More like…failing a question." Galahad corrected.
Death gasped quietly when he said that. That made him laugh a bit.
"You died from failing a question? That's hilarious. Go on then, spill the beans." He said.
"It all began almost a couple years prior to when me, and a few other knights were part of King Arthur, King of the Britons, were tasked by God for a sacred quest; to find the Holy Grail. We were eventually led to the Bridge of Death. It was guarded by an old man from Scene 24. We must answer 3 questions to cross in safely or be cast into the gorge of eternal peril. The first questions were straightforward, but the 3rd question is where I died." Galahad explained.
"Oh, goodie! Let me guess what the man asked. What was the capital of Assyria?" Death assumed.
"No, that would be Sir Robin." He corrected.
"HAA! But what was yours?" Death asked.
"My last question to answer was answer my favorite color. I answered blue, but I was wrong. I meant to say yellow, but before I could correct myself, I died." He finished.
"AAAAHHHHHH HAHAHAH!" Death exploded into laughter while standing up, making Galahad look embarrassed. "You died from not answering your favorite color!? I guess you felt both blue and grey when you said it wrong! You're through to the afterlife!" He finished.
"Well…thank you. You're too kind." Galahad said before turning around.
"Watch for any rigidity bridges along the way!" Death called out before chuckling more until he left. "Well, that was fun. Time to see what more people I can humiliate in the future." He finished.
Stupid death! Stupid death! Hope next time it's not you!
HEHE!
