"In this house of mud and water,

my heart has fallen to ruins.

Enter this house, my Love, or let me leave."

— Jalāl al-Dīn Muḥammad Rūmī (Rumi)


"If Golding's Lord of the Flies is in there, I'll trade you," Caroline called out, holding up her book on Harlem Renaissance visual artists to show her roommate who inexplicably seemed to have brought a very thick literature anthology book to the set. With a grin, she added, "Based on what I've seen so far of this dating show, any second now someone's going to steal the conch and kill Piggy."

Based on Hayley's vacant expression, it didn't look like Caroline's joke landed. Finally, Hayley shook her head, and replied, "No, I'm good with this one. Plus, I don't know that much about the Harlem Renaissance. Well, I mean, other than David, Michael, Angelo, and da Vinci."

Caroline could feel her eye twitch at everything that was wrong with that statement, but managed to smile and ask politely, "So, what are you reading?"

Hayley blinked in confusion as though finally noticing the heavy book in her arms. "Oh, I'm not actually reading it. I just brought this so I could get the smart girl edit, you know? It's super important on these shows to get in on that early in filming."

She made a noncommittal noise and nodded, torn between despair and elation that she somehow ended up with Hayley as her roommate on this show. Hayley was a lot of things that the high school mean-girl version of Caroline would've ruthlessly plotted and schemed to make miserable, but that's just not who she was anymore. Besides, there was something almost charming about the wide-eyed naiveté that Hayley seemed to ferociously fight within herself so that she could be perceived as worldly and interesting.

Plus, being roommates with Hayley meant that she wasn't roommates with Davina, the contestant who kept trying to do everyone's star charts and cited them as scientific proof that Kol was her destiny. Not to mention her frequent 'trances' to channel the spirits of her ancestors. Klaus and the producers must be thrilled with the ratings her bizarre antics were probably earning.

Ugh Klaus. Nope. Not thinking about him or his weird, fumbling apology from the other night. Speaking of, she was surprised by how much fun she ended up having with Kol and Katherine in the gardens with the tacky sculpture reproductions. She was certain it wasn't the sloppy-drunk shenanigans that Kol probably would've preferred, but they had a couple of drinks, Caroline talked shit about the overhyped statues using some of her best snooty art degree vocab, and Katherine and Kol added colorful commentary that was uniquely, hilariously them. It would be a nice surprise if she actually managed to make friends after this silly show was over.

"So, you wanna come with and score a good spot in the library? We better hurry or else all the good spots go fast," Hayley asked, pulling Caroline from her thoughts.

Feeling her stomach grumble at the hasty granola bar she'd grabbed before the cameras started up for the day, she replied, "Actually, I'm going down to the kitchen and make a sandwich. But maybe next time." One of the many, many things she hadn't thought about before agreeing to do this show was the fact that rarely are contestants ever seen eating on TV. Apparently, it's by design — their microphones pick up everything and the producers decided hearing people chew was unsexy. Why couldn't their microphones just be muted when they ate?

Common sense on a reality show was as rare as an honest confessional.


The jangling of the decorative copper pots made Klaus grind his teeth. Caroline was...cooking? Reality dating show contestants didn't cook. They also didn't stubbornly negotiate better contract deals for their charities, or organize the production team into a union to challenge their working conditions, or loudly talk shit about the set statuary, or debate art with him.

With a heavy sigh, he recalled how Caroline hadn't been debating art with him lately. Instead, she'd been debating art with Kol. Like that bloody wanker was able to follow Caroline's impassioned speech about artists needing to have the freedom to attach conditions to allowing the public to view their work, citing Picasso's Guernica as an example. Klaus had opinions — not that Caroline bothered to ask for them. Bollocks. Stop fantasizing about a life you don't even want. You're here to fix your brother's reputation and nothing more.

After a hasty, whispered conversation with someone from set design, he was reassured that the copper pots actually were real and Caroline likely wouldn't burn down the mansion using them. A quick glance at the bustling activity around him revealed that the crew was still setting up and this would be one of the few times they could speak freely for a few moments. But what if Caroline didn't want to talk to him? He inwardly groaned, feeling like an idiot schoolboy. Stop dithering about and go talk to her.

With an appreciative eye, he watched Caroline move with a careless grace, and his heart gave a funny little tweak at the secret sunshine smile touching her lips when she plucked two jars from the pantry. She looked up in surprise, as though she'd momentarily forgotten where she was. "Um...hi," she said awkwardly, dumping all the contents into a shallow saucepan. "I hope it's ok to do this," she half-asked, but the stubborn jut of her chin told Klaus that she was gearing up for another fight if need be.

Utterly charmed, Klaus shook his head, asking curiously, "What are you making?" Stirring with a wooden spoon should not be erotic. Did she have to slide her fingers up and down like that?

"I found a jar of pesto and decided to jazz it up with some marinated artichoke hearts." Mercifully, Caroline stopped that devilishly seductive stirring and asked, "Do you guys have havarti or maybe a good Jarlsberg? I'm making pesto grilled cheese."

Realizing he was still gaping at her, he busied himself at the enormous built-in refrigerator, feeling absurdly pleased with himself when he found both among the contents. "Here you are, sweetheart," he replied, setting down the packages as though they burned him when her arm accidentally grazed his. The silence that stretched between them was fraught with tension, and he thought back to his hurried, stilted apology from the other day.

"I need to maintain a certain...distance from the contestants so that I can be objective."

"You test my resolve."

And then there was the part where he told the girl he fancied that she'd be perfect for his brother. Bollocks. "I like cheese. Uh, like a Stilton or...you know, other, uh cheese varieties." I like cheese? That's what he came up with to diffuse the tension?

However, from the slight twitch at the corners of her lips, it seemed as though Caroline was enjoying his clumsy approach. "Grilled cheese is one of my favorite comfort foods," she offered with a shrug, adding slices of cheese to the sauce.

"Do you need...comfort," he asked hesitantly, searching her face for signs of discontent. It astonished him to realize how invested he was in her happiness.

She paused in the middle of buttering sourdough slices, a small furrow at her brow as she seemed to consider him carefully. "Not...comfort, exactly. It's just weird here and the only way to get past all the weird is through it. Preferably with carbs."

"A cheese toastie used to be waiting for me whenever I was on holiday from White Oaks," he unexpectedly said, grimacing a bit at the revelation of his posh boarding school. After all, he was certain Caroline had formed certain (justifiable) opinions about his and Kol's privileged upbringing.

She favored him with one of her sunshine smiles. "That's really sweet — that your parents would do that for you."

His chuckle was tinged with a bitterness that always followed his childhood memories. "It was actually one of our chefs, Maddox. He took a shine to me, even used to sneak me caramels after an ugly row with my father."

Caroline's blue eyes widened at his revelation, and the knowing expression that briefly crossed her face made him look away. She saw too much. With a practiced flick, she flipped over the perfectly toasted bread, her voice soft and a bit uncertain as she offered, "You had a Maddox and I had a Grams. She was Bonnie's grandmother and used to let me stay with her whenever I'd get lonely. Um...my mom's a workaholic sheriff."

He studied the stiff lines of her shoulders and the extra force she used to halve her meal. And he recognized the too-practiced air of nonchalance in her revelation. Throwaways always recognize each other. Taking the offered toasted wedge with a smile of thanks, he took a hearty bite, savoring the salted butter and cheeses and allowed himself a fleeting, selfish moment to pretend that Caroline had made this just for him. Perhaps they'd stopped by his place after an evening out, all rosy cheeks and lazy smiles from good wine. There would be a pleasant, expectant buzz in the air and finally they'd give into the delightful tension between them. "Klaus," she whispered breathlessly, "Kl—"

"Klaus?" From the impatience in her voice, it sounded like she'd been trying to get his attention for some time. "Nodding toward the bustling activity on the set behind him, she asked, "I think maybe your crew is ready to start filming?"

Face growing hot at becoming swept up in foolish daydreams, he awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck and hastily mumbled, "Right. I should be off then and leave you to your meal," and swiftly exited the kitchen.

The crew was still going over tedious, last-minute instructions from the producers, so his inept and ill-advised flirting hadn't been noticed. He took his usual place in a back room to watch the dailies, and with an irritated sigh, put in his earpiece as Kol poked his head into the kitchen to greet Caroline.

So far, filming had been a fairly quick occurrence as there'd been quite a bit of contestant-initiated drama, but apparently, there were only so many brawls that could breakout over which women were there "for the right reasons", and there had been a painful (and costly) lull in action. The producers had jumped at the opportunity for a wholesome, girl-next-door scene when Caroline decided to wander down to the kitchen.

"Caroline! Fancy running into you here," Kol sunnily told her, and Klaus didn't bother hiding his grin at Caroline's derisive snort.

"Can I get another script read on that line, Fabio?"

Kol emitted a genuine bark of laughter at her cheeky response, dragging over a barstool to shamelessly sit too close to her at the counter. "I knew you'd be marvelous fun — just like our little rendezvous alone in the gardens," he added, comically wiggling his eyebrows. Klaus cringed, certain he'd reminded Kol repeatedly about how ridiculous he looked when he did that.

But Caroline must not have minded his brother's childish display as she replied, "It was so not like that and you know it. Besides, Katherine was with us, remember?"

"Oh right, I guess she was there too."

Noticing the flash of irritation on Caroline's lovely face, Klaus hastily told Kol, "Caroline's formed a friendship with Katherine — so refrain from any disparaging remarks. Compliment her. Say, 'Katherine's certainly a wild card, and she's a powerful presence in every room, that's for certain. I must admit, I was surprised to notice the budding friendship you two seem to have and was curious to know how it came about?'"

Klaus watched intently as Caroline's tense frame relaxed slightly and suddenly her sunshine smile showed the beginnings of genuine warmth. For Kol. She was smiling at his brother and telling him that she had a feeling Katherine had the potential to be as fiercely loyal as her friend Bonnie and that she never passed up the opportunity to fill her life with more Bonnies. And then she regaled him with a witty anecdote about stolen decorations for a school dance and repurposing sports trophies for punchbowls.

When there was a lull in the conversation, Klaus noticed the faraway look in Caroline's eye. He hissed in his brother's earpiece, "Tell her 'It must be difficult to live so far away from Bonnie, but that you're impressed by how the distance hadn't affected their friendship, given how close they'd seemed during the interview.'"

Kol repeated Klaus' words to Caroline, but then he added something so genuine and heartfelt all by himself that it seemed to shock them all. "I envy you. To have a friendship like that; to know there's always someone looking out for you — I've never really had that."

The frank surprise on Caroline's face was endearing, especially as she fumbled for the right words. "But you have that," she protested, "I mean, you have Klaus and he's smart and loyal and clearly cares so much about you!"

Klaus' heart hammered in his chest at Caroline's outburst. Smart and loyal. She thought he was smart and loyal. She...thought about him?

Blue eyes widened as though she realized what she'd said, and Caroline quickly stammered, "Um...it's just that Klaus is very goal-oriented and driven to helping you find someone."

To his credit, Kol recovered faster than Klaus at her surprising admission, bizarrely deepening his accent in what Klaus assumed he thought was a seductive manner. "My brother helped me find you."

The flash of uncertainty in her eyes filled Klaus with a curious mix of self-loathing and elation when Caroline retorted, "Seriously?! Klaus picked me because I'm good for ratings."

Shaking his head, Klaus hoarsely told Kol, "You need say, 'But that's not how I feel. This show has been about everything but me and how I feel.'"

"I...how do you feel," Caroline asked hesitantly, as though afraid of the answer.

Feeling something break inside his chest, Klaus let out a sigh of resignation as he instructed his brother, "And now tell her, 'You're radiant, and full of light, and far too good for me.'"

Klaus had to look away when Kol leaned in to kiss Caroline.