Pokémon Police Force Chapter 34: The Breakup
Three weeks had passed since I started training at the summit Apex Mountain under the tutelage of Zygarde itself. Keldeo and Jessie kept themselves busy, either from hunting, foraging or sparring. That last one I think was more to stave off boredom than any actual desire to get stronger.
As for myself, Zygarde informed me that where I struggled in using its powers was mentally. I'd unintentionally built-up mental barriers that hindered my ability to call upon it. I was still malnourished from three years of starvation, so my body was weak as well, just not to the same degree.
Most of my training was focused on meditation. The goal, to familiarize myself with the Core inside me and deepen our bonds. Zygarde claimed that once those bonds were strengthened, the barriers should fall down on their own. My training was only interrupted for food, rest and bathing. This continued like this until Zygarde was sure I understood the basics.
"Your training as of now, is concluded," said Zygarde, "you must locate and save Yveltal."
It was just Zygarde and I at the shrine right now. The others had gone looking for more food.
"Where can I find Yveltal?" I asked.
"Team PWNK headquarters. Yveltal rests at the exact center of the fortress."
"Where exactly is that?"
"The Octagon. It's a massive tower at the center of the aptly-named Badlands."
"I've never heard of that place, but I know someone who might."
"Trust your instincts."
I left the shrine with those words. It took no time at all to find Keldeo and Jessie, who were walking back up the mountain with a bag full of berries.
"Hey there," said Keldeo, "what're you doing down here?"
"Zygarde said my training was finished," I replied, "have any Pecha Berries? I could use something sweet."
"Here you go," said Jessie, handing the berry to me, "where to now?"
"To Snow. Regrettably, I've got to drag her back into this now. Unless either of you know where we can find the Badlands."
"That's on the Windy Continent," said Keldeo at once, "are you wanting to go to the Octagon?"
"The Octagon?" Asked Jessie.
"How did you know?"
"Wait, what?" Asked Jessie.
"I've travelled all over with the Swords," said Keldeo, "the Octagon is a massive tower set in the middle of the Badlands. It's a colosseum where Pokémon duke it out day and night."
"Why are you wanting to go there?" Asked Jessie.
"It's Team PWNK's main base. Yveltal is there."
"Right, let's save the goddess of… death… What're we even doing!?" Yelled a flustered Keldeo.
We continued to walk down the mountain. We never stopped until we got to the base, right where the flames were several weeks ago.
"Hey, look! The flames are gone," I said.
"Wait, before we go any further, Jessie give him the thing."
"What thing? Oh! Completely slipped my mind!"
Jessie reached into her maw-like horns and retrieved a bundle of leather.
"Keldeo and I worked very hard to make it."
I took the leather from her and examined it. It was a half-mask of leather! Keldeo and Jessie made me a new mask! I was pleasantly surprised to see that it looked almost like my old one.
"Just don't ask where we got all that leather," said Keldeo.
"This is the best gift I ever received," I said before kissing Jessie on the lips.
"Don't kiss me," said Keldeo, "or I'll kill you."
I laughed at that.
"Wow, that was the first time I've laughed in so long," I said.
I pressed the mask to my face and fastened it in place. Surprisingly, they got my dimensions perfectly. Apparently, they had used my old mask as a base. After the fitting, the trio of us finished our descent from the mountain.
"Took your sweet time, didn't you?"
My heart nearly stopped. That voice was like a ghost from my past. Between us and the Foggy Forest sat the Swords of Justice, Team Raider and the entourage that Jessie and I abandoned. My eyes flung to Emerald, the speaker. She sat cross-legged on a stump, eating a Tamato Berry.
(I can't believe I forgot about all of them.)
"Look, I know that I'm wanted, who doesn't want a drink of this?"
"At least his terrible sense of humor is back," said Sheriashuu, the Mienshao.
"But… we don't have the time to deal with whatever this is," I continued, "so if you don't mind, we're leaving."
I turned and began walking away, but Gallade stopped me by holding a sword-arm to my neck.
"You aren't going anywhere, outlaw," Gallade warned.
"Get out of the way. I don't want to hurt you."
"Ha! How will you manage- that…?"
A green aura erupted from the covered-up corrupted places on my body.
"I can kill you without even trying," I said, "don't test me."
This made Gallade back up.
"How did you all find us anyway?" Asked Jessie.
Emerald, the Braixen, crushed the Tamato Berry she was holding and stood up.
"Green flames. Mountain top. Ring any bells?" Asked Emerald.
"Wait, green flames?" I asked, "when and where?"
"You were kind of… emitting those as you trained," explained Keldeo.
"Why didn't anyone tell me!? Oy vey."
"What training are you talking about?" Asked Snow, the Glaceon.
"Keldeo, why are you siding with criminals?" Asked Terrakion.
"I took the pledge," explained Keldeo, "I'm sworn to protect Argyle! Uhh… Zygarde! I mean… which do you prefer?"
"Argyle."
"Argyle it is!"
"What does Zygarde have to do with this?" Asked Virizion.
"Admiral Sneezy is half-Zygarde, that's what!" Said Slowbro.
"Is that true?" Asked Cobalion.
I removed my mask and gave everyone a good look, much to the shock of most present.
"It's more like 5% really," I said, "and Slowbro, could you stop with the nicknames?"
"Nope! I like Admiral Sneezy."
"I'm really confused," admitted Rhyperior, "who is Zygarde? What is this pledge? I have so many questions!"
"Only a god that protects the world!" Said Sal.
"A GOD!?" Said Team Raider in unison.
"Oh, Argyle! Can I speak to you and Jessie alone?" Asked Sal.
"I'm following Argyle," said Keldeo.
"Sorry Sal, but whatever you have to say, you can say to everyone," I said.
I replaced the mask on my face.
"You're making this a lot harder, but I guess I can't argue," said Sal, "you know that egg you entrusted to me?"
"You lost junior, didn't you?" Asked Jessie, incredulously.
"No, of course not! Salazzles like myself know how to care for eggs," said Sal, a bit annoyed, "I managed to keep her safe and brought her to Chansey's Nursery in Treasure Town."
"No safer place for Pokémon Eggs in my opinion," said Roserade.
"You said 'her'," Keldeo pointed out.
"Yeah, Chansey identified the baby inside as a girl. A baby girl!"
"A baby girl!" Said Jessie gleefully, "our baby!"
"I wouldn't get too excited," said Sal, "the egg is a Fennekin Egg."
"You mean…"
"Yeah, Emerald is the mommy, not you," said Sal, downcast.
"Bawhaha! You're gonna be a daddy! Good on ya, mate!" Said a jovial Terrakion.
"There is no greater joy," said Virizion, "I remember my first child."
"You may be an outlaw, but I'm still happy for you," said Roserade.
"Argyle, I thought you loved me," said Jessie, glaring at me with such an intensity that could spell disaster if someone found out how to weaponize dirty looks.
"Of course, I love you, babe!" I said at once.
"Then explain to me why you've spent so much time around that cop! We never made any eggs together and you go and have kids with a cop!?" Said Jessie almost shouting at me, "APPARENTLY, YOU DON'T CARE ENOUGH ABOUT ME! IT'S ALL JUST WORDS TO YOU!"
Okay, now she was shouting at me.
"Jessie! Calm down!"
"DON'T YOU 'JESSIE, CALM DOWN' ME! YOU NEVER CARED ABOUT US! WE'RE THROUGH!"
Jessie snapped her fingers and suddenly, we were accosted on all sides by rough-looking Pokémon. They came out of the trees, the bushes, boulders and everywhere.
"Get Argyle," said Jessie, "get him and hurt him. Throw him in the pits!"
"Jessie! What's gotten into you!?" Yelled Sheriashuu.
"And hurt anyone that gets in your way," said Jessie.
And then, chaos reigned once more.
(What's wrong with that crazy Mawile!?)
I've heard of messy breakups before, but this was ridiculous! I just ducked underneath a Solarbeam aimed at my face.
"Argyle! What did you do!?" I asked.
"It's your fault for being so clingy!" Spat Argyle.
"Could you two stop acting like a married couple and focus!?" Snapped Snow.
Sheriashuu began laughing.
"What!?"
"You have no idea how funny that is," chuckled Sheriashuu.
"What now, Argyle?" Asked Cobalion.
"The Foggy Forest!" Said Argyle, "we can lose them there!"
"And get lost ourselves," said Roserade.
"Trust Argyle," I said, "he knows the way."
Now best of friends under this assault, Team Raider, the Swords of Justice and us began trying to sneak away from the crazy Mawile and her band of misfits.
"She's not going to let us go," said Gallade, "Roserade, maybe we should-"
"I know," said Roserade, "Rhyperior?"
"Say no more! Rock Blast!"
Rhyperior began blasting Geodudes into the chaos. Gallade was right beside him, rapid-firing Psycho Cuts.
"We will distract them," said Roserade, "get out of here!"
"Thank you, for everything," said Argyle, "this doesn't make us friends. Now, go!"
Team Raider, now the distraction, afforded us time to get ourselves thoroughly lost in the woods. Though, luckily with Argyle's Sight, we were able to get through the fog and into a very steamy cave. Once we were able to get our bearings, we left and headed south and out of the forest.
"So, Zygarde, huh?" Said Cobalion.
"Yeah, when I was a kid, I almost died. Zygarde saved me by fusing with me."
"We got separated and I found Argyle. He shown me his power and I took it as a sign," explained Keldeo.
"So, you decided to pledge yourself to Argyle?" Asked Virizion.
"We did every step but the combat," said Keldeo.
"I'm not at full strength and we were being chased," Argyle explained.
"I would like to witness that!" Said Terrakion.
"Changing the subject," I said, "what was this training you were talking about? What are you doing here around Treasure Town?"
"I guess it had to come out eventually."
I had fully recounted what had happened since we divided at the narrows. Sheriashuu had another hissy-fit. This time it was about Don and Dave's deception.
"So, what about the training?" Asked Sal.
"Not much to say," I replied, "meditation, mostly. According to Zygarde, I shouldn't have any more… anger problems."
"What happened last time?" Asked Virizion.
"I died, Argyle's fault," said Sheriashuu, "I was revived. Also, Argyle's fault."
"You mentioned my name in that explanation," said Snow.
"I need to get to the Windy Continent. To the Badlands."
"Why would you want to go there?" Asked Snow, "why did you decide to abandon-?"
"Yveltal."
"That goddess of death?" Asked Slowbro, "what about her?"
"Team PWNK has her," said Keldeo.
"And I assume she's in the Octagon?" Asked Cobalion.
"Yes," answered Keldeo.
"I'm the only one who could possibly survive her attacks," I said, "I must go."
Terrakion laughed.
"Keldeo, you and Argyle enter that tournament!" Said Terrakion.
"What? Why?" Said Keldeo and I together.
"You can perform the final part of the pledge there!" Said Terrakion.
"That is a great idea, Terrakion," said Virizion.
"Heh, there's brains behind this beef!"
"Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce Terrakion," said Keldeo sarcastically.
"Moving on," I said, walking to Sheriashuu.
I held out the Moon Charm I hid in my Treasure Bag.
"Can you explain the mystery behind these charms? You know, to those of us who aren't gypsies?"
Sheriashuu snickered and then looked at Emerald, who just waved her on.
"The Sun and Moon charms symbolize two halves of the same whole. Together, they are one. The fact that you two possess them means that you are destined to be together."
Sheriashuu lowered her voice to barely a whisper.
"The Charms are a gypsy engagement ring," Sheriashuu finished.
"A gypsy… what?"
I looked at Emerald, who was trying not to look at me.
"WHAT!?"
Sheriashuu couldn't hold on any longer and broke down in renewed laughter.
"OH MY GODS! THAT FACE!"
"I sure am glad Jessie's not here," said Snow.
I allowed myself to look away from Emerald. The moment I did, I was tackled to the ground.
"E-Emerald! Honey?"
"Shut up."
The Braixen clasped something cold and metal around my wrists.
"Emerald!" Shouted Sal in shock.
"Argyle! I place you under arrest under suspicion of murder!"
"Get away from the boss!" Yelled Slowbro and Keldeo in unison.
"Emerald! What has gotten into you!?" Yelled Snow.
"Emerald! This isn't funny!" I said.
"Shut up! You have the right to remain silent!"
The others tried to save me, but Sheriashuu knocked them all aside.
"Trust us," whispered Sheriashuu.
Again, the others tried to save me, but Cobalion jumped in the way.
"Cobalion!" Said Virizion in surprise.
"Roserade, Emerald and I had a long talk," said Cobalion, "don't interfere. We have a plan."
Snow tried to follow as I was led away, but Keldeo got in her way.
"Trust Cobalion," said Keldeo, "I'll protect Argyle. This I've sworn."
Keldeo ran up and joined us. He didn't make any moves to save me. Rather, he just watched the two officers, ready to help if things went so far south, we hit Pokémon Brazil.
We travelled south from the Foggy Forest, under chains. Sheriashuu and Emerald guiding me along and Keldeo bringing up the rear. Eventually, I broke free of them and stood by Keldeo.
"Argyle!" Said Emerald.
"Keldeo? Do the honors?"
With a quick slash, my shackles broke and slid off my wrists. They landed in a broken heap on the ground.
"I'm not going any further," I said, "until you give me a good reason why I should."
"Officer Magnezone wants to see you," said Sheriashuu, "if you cooperate, we can get your entire bounty resolved."
"Argyle? Why are you smiling?" Asked Keldeo.
"Don't you know by now?" I asked, "a great thief never gets caught."
"And now he runs," said Sheriashuu, "and your engagement was going so well."
"Stuff a sock in it!" Snapped Emerald.
"Hey, how about one date?" I asked.
"A date with you?"
"No, a date with Slowbro," I said sarcastically, "of course me. A little dinner, some dancing. Maybe a picnic will do it. Some wine. How does that sound?"
"No," said Emerald.
"If she doesn't want it, I'll take it."
"Quiet, you!"
We followed the voices to the top of some abandoned stone temple. What I'd seen made me do a double-take. Four Wartortles with headbands arguing among themselves.
"You'll ruin our cover!"
"What cover? We're standing on a temple."
"I'm hungry."
"You can eat later!"
"Yay!"
"Hey!" I shouted, making them all jump, "we can all hear you; you know!"
"Yipes! We've been found!"
"Arms in!"
"One, two, three, Shellshocked!"
Three of the Wartortles descended the temple with agility and grace unheard of in half-shelled reptiles. The last… kind of fell."
"Ow…"
"Confound it, Blue!"
"I'm just so hungry!"
The four Wartortles were all wearing different colored headbands in colors of Blue, Brown, Purple and Silver. Their shells were also painted the same colors.
"Get up here, Blue! We need to do the pose!" Said the Purple one.
The blue one ran to join the others.
"Silver!"
"Purple!"
"Brown!"
"Blue!"
"As! One! We! Are!"
"The Magnificent Ninjatortles!"
They did a weird group pose with that last line. Purple was in front, with his fist on the ground. Silver and Brown were right behind, on opposing sides, with their arms extended like they were fencing. Blue was in the very back with his body in a Y-shape. Suddenly, a poof of smoke and confetti blasted out from behind them.
"Ninjatortles?" I asked, "what's next, a space samurai? If so, I'm out of this fanfic."
"I'm more concerned by the fact that ghosts apparently have confetti launchers," said Keldeo.
"And what's with that strange pose?" Asked Emerald.
"Our poses are cool!" Shouted out Silver.
"We are the Ninjatortle brothers!" Said Brown, "ninjas for justice!"
"They're getting punched," said Sheriashuu.
"Have any moves to deal with Water Types?" I asked Keldeo.
"Sadly, that was Virizion's department."
"You're interfering with official police business," said Emerald, "buzz off!"
"Maybe we should," said Blue, "they are the good-"
"Quiet!" Snapped Purple, "one more remark out of you and its back to the box!"
"Please don't send me back there."
"Anyway… we're not here to arrest him, just beat him up," said Brown.
"Why?" Asked Sheriashuu.
"Who knows, who cares?" Said Silver, "feel the wrath of the Ninjatortles!"
Then, they all snapped their fingers. One after the other.
"Weather Ball!" They all yelled at the same time.
In each of their hands, formed a cyclone of wind about half the size of my head. The winds then formed a blob of grey air that they each lobbed at me. The Weather Balls were fast, but naturally, I was faster.
"Ice Beam!" Blue and I yelled.
Our attacks collided halfway and began covering everything in an arctic chill.
"Hydro Pump!" Yelled the other three.
"Scald!"
"Flamethrower!"
The five attacks met with Keldeo taking two Hydro Pumps at once. The attacks covered the entire battlefield in a thick cloud of steam.
"High Jump Kick!"
With a pained yell, Blue was launched out of the steam and crashed hard into the temple. Only when the steam had cleared did the three remaining Wartortles realize what just happened.
"Blue!" Yelled Silver.
"Oran Berry!" Yelled Brown as he tossed the aforementioned item to Blue.
"Yay! Food!"
Blue munched down on the berry and was quickly revitalized. Afterward, he joined the others with a spring in his step.
"Thanks for the noms, Brown!" Said Blue.
"Stop calling it that."
"Why didn't that do more damage?" Asked Sheriashuu.
"Because we're Tortles in a half-shell," said Silver.
Sheriashuu rolled her eyes at this.
"Argyle, remember that idea you had?" Asked Keldeo.
"We've had no time to practice that!"
"Well, let's call it proof of concept."
I looked at the four Wartortles, posing once more.
"Anything to get away from them," I answered finally.
"What're you planning?" Asked Purple.
"You'll find out soon enough. Ice Beam!"
The Wartortles braced for impact, but instead I aimed the beam at the ground, freezing it.
"Aqua Jet!" Yelled Keldeo.
Keldeo shot high-powered water spouts from his hooves and blasted forward. He caught Argyle between his horn and nose. Argyle was still firing his Ice Beam, turning them into an ice-breathing train.
With Keldeo's Aqua Jet, they lifted off the ground and into the air. After several minutes of aerial acrobatics, Keldeo and Argyle stood over the Wartortles on two opposing points of an enormous icy spire.
"Oi! What're you doing up there!?" Asked Purple.
"Who cares? It's pretty!" Said Blue.
Argyle and Keldeo jumped down and began sliding on the ice. They slid around each other in a double helix.
"Ice Beam!"
"Scald!"
The two attacks hit each other as they descended, forming a waterfall of steam.
"Oh shi-!" Was all Brown was able to say before the steam hit them like a pile driver.
"Emerald, let's try a combo move of our own," said Sheriashuu.
I smiled.
"You thinking what I'm thinking?"
"Oh yeah."
Argyle and Keldeo slid out of the impromptu ice sculpture just as Sheriashuu and I began an ice skating competition of our own.
"That actually worked out a lot better than I thought it would," I said, "needs some patching up, but-"
"Argyle, look!" Said Keldeo.
Keldeo was looking at our icy spire. Inside, Officers Emerald and Sheriashuu were blasting the steam-shrouded Ninjatortles with Psyshocks and Aura Spheres, jumping from ice slide to ice slide. Eventually, they promptly shifted gears and Emerald climbed the structure to the point where Keldeo once stood. Sheriashuu jumped out of the structure and faced the steam.
The Mienshao put her hands together and began gathering energy between them. The energy became an aura of energy.
"I think I broke something."
"Quit your whining."
"Easy for you to say, your butt's on my nose!"
Emerald leaped off the spire and into the middle, where the steam cloud still was.
"Brown, don't you have Rapid Spin?"
"Yeah. Maybe I can use that to blow this away!"
"Flamethrower!"
"Aura Sphere!"
As Emerald fell, she aimed her stick at the steam and fired down. Sheriashuu smirked and promptly changed direction, aiming the attack at Emerald.
"Larry aka boo!" I yelled, "stop!"
Surprisingly, the Aura Sphere didn't hit Emerald, it hit her Flamethrower. The colliding attacks caused a huge explosion. A shockwave emitted from the blast, pushing the Braixen safely away from the explosion. Now, she sat suspended in the air on top of her stick with her arms outstretched.
"Psychic!"
Overflowing with mystical energy, Emerald clapped. All the debris from the explosion imploded, catching the four in a shower of flames, sharp ice shards and psychic energy.
Right after the implosion was another explosion, this one launching the four Wartortle brothers out and knocking them all out upon impact with the ground.
"Flamethrower!" Yelled Emerald as she sat on the stick.
Like a witch on a broom, as a plume of flame erupted from the stick, it propelled her forward. She steered the stick to the ground and dismounted. With a spin and a flourish, she stuck the stick back in her tail.
"Emerald, what the Voidlands was that?" Asked Keldeo.
"I could ask you two the same thing," Emerald retorted, "are you trying for a contest or something?"
Without warning, Sheriashuu shoved me against the side of the temple.
"Two things, weasel," she said, glaring at me, "first of all, call me Sherry. You can't seem to ever pronounce my name right. It's not that hard!"
"Sherry, let him go," said Keldeo.
"You stop that," said Sherry, "it's still Sheriashuu to you. You haven't earned the right."
"Really? You prefer the thief over me?"
"I don't prefer anyone!"
"So, there's still hope!"
"I am not going to glorify that," said Sheriashuu, "as for the second thing, you're still under arrest."
"Okay, okay," I said, "just answer me one thing."
"What?"
I took a rag from my bag and pressed it against her face.
"Does this smell like chloroform to you?" I asked.
The chemicals worked like a charm and quickly knocked the Mienshao out.
"I have to thank Sal for this later."
"So, now what?" Asked Keldeo, "I can knock out Emerald for you."
"Hey!"
"That won't be necessary," I replied, "so Emerald, about the charms… are we, really engaged?"
Emerald sighed, and much to my surprise, she wasn't blushing this time.
"No, I rejected you back then."
"You should accept," said Keldeo, "you two would make a cute couple."
I swear I've never seen a Braixen this color of red before.
"Emerald, think about it," I said, placing my hand on her shoulder, "I found one key and your family had the other. It seems that destiny wants us to at least try it out. We should humor destiny for now."
"I'm not ready for marriage. Least of all with a thief."
"Let's just try one date," I echoed, "if we don't click, we can call it off."
"I guess I can try that," said Emerald, finally calming down, "after Sheriashuu wakes up, that is."
"I need to come up with a locale anyway," I said, "I'm not welcome in most places around here."
"How about Winoa?" Asked Keldeo.
"Winoa?" I asked, "isn't that on the Windy Continent?"
"Yeah, since we'll be going there anyway."
"Wouldn't the law still find me there?"
"Each continent tracks their crime separately," Emerald explained, "a wanted criminal here on the Water Continent would have no bounty there. The law may keep an eye on you but unless you cause trouble, they won't bother you."
"Winoa is also famous for its cuisine," said Keldeo, "perfect place for a date if you ask me."
"Can we talk about this later?" Asked Emerald, "I don't know about you two, but I'm tired."
"Let's go into the temple," said Keldeo, "we can take a nap there."
