Riff started rummaging around in one of the bags and pulled out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He held the pack out to Grazi and she hesitated for a moment. "Relax," Riff said, a strange look on his face. "They're Tony's. My payment for watching everyone's shit."
Grazi slid one out of the pack and held it to her lips. Riff lit the end for her, then lit one for himself. They sat there for a moment, smoking together in silence. Grazi had no idea what to say in response to Riff's sudden vulnerability. Why was he so convinced that she'd drive a wedge between he and Tony? Why was she so different from the apparently large number of girls he'd already been with? And why, oh why, did knowing about Riff's secret struggle with motion sickness make her feel so special? He'd confided in her and it felt big, somehow. A secret weakness, something not even the boys knew. But why did she care? She wasn't sure she wanted to examine those feelings. At least not yet.
"Why do you want to hang around with guys like us anyway?" Riff asked suddenly. He took another puff of his cigarette.
"The financial benefits," Grazi joked automatically.
But Riff wasn't satisfied. "For real," he said. "You come from a good, decent family. Your parents are pretty square, right? You ain't rich or you wouldn't live in the neighborhood but you ain't rough either."
Graziella shrugged. Riff had been vulnerable with her but she wasn't sure she was ready to reciprocate. "I was the new girl and I met Velma on my first day. She kind of adopted me. You know that."
"Yeah but once you met the gang, you weren't scared off? I know it can't just be about Tony. You've been trying to keep up with everyone since day one." He didn't seem particularly upset about it, just curious. Like she were a puzzle he'd been trying to figure out.
"No, it ain't just about Tony." Grazi put out her cigarette and took a deep breath. She wasn't even totally sure she understood why she was so drawn to the gang. But Riff was right, it was bigger than her crush on Tony or even her friendship with Velma. "Do you know why my family moved moved to the neighborhood?" she asked.
Riff nodded. He put out his own cigarette."Velma said your dad lost his job. That right?"
Grazi closed her eyes for a moment, listening to the sounds of the amusement park. "Yeah, he did. My ma got a job as a clerk at Gimble's but it doesn't pay enough to keep our old place. We had to move." She sighed. "I'll ask you another question. Do you know why my dad lost his job?"
Riff shook his head. There wasn't an ounce of humor or teasing in his eyes. "Can't say I do."
Graziella wasn't surprised. She hadn't told anyone, not even Velma. However, she was surprised when Riff spoke again. "But I think I could guess," he said quietly. When Grazi didn't reply, he continued. "Was it drink?" His voice was gentle.
Grazi was stunned into honesty. "Yeah. It wasn't out of nowhere. He'd always liked his booze. But it's like he used to be able to hide it. Suddenly, he couldn't. It's like it gets worse everyday now, even more since we moved and Ma started working." She was embarrassed to hear her herself choking up a little bit. She never talked about this. Never ever. "It's like I'm losing him. And I lost my home, my old friends, my whole damn life."
Riff looked sympathetic but not at all surprised. "And the gang gives you a sense of security," he said. It wasn't a question. He seemed to understand.
"Maybe I see you all as a sort of new family," Graziella said. "One I could join."
"A new life, new Grazi?" Riff asked.
He'd hit the nail right on the head. Riff saw everything, apparently. "Yeah, exactly."
"Well, I think you're in," Riff said. "Everyone loves you."
Grazi nudged Riff on the shoulder. "Except for you," she said, starting to smile.
"I ain't so easy to win over," Riff said, then he smiled back. "Nah, you're alright." A beat passed before he added "more than alright."
Coming from Riff, that seemed like high praise. More than alright? He might as well have declared his undying love. Grazi nearly blushed. "I can't believe you got me talking about all this shit," she said. The rest of the group had seen her puke her guts out but this somehow felt more vulnerable. She hadn't set out to bare her soul like that. How had he managed to pull so much out of her? He hadn't done anything at all, really. He'd seemed to understand her without any effort at all.
"It's a gift," Riff said. "My superpower. Gettin people to talk, I mean."
His words hurt a bit for some reason, setting off emotions Grazi couldn't place. Was that...disappointment? It wasn't that Riff understood her in particular, he apparently understood everybody. "You think pretty highly of yourself, dontcha?" Grazi snapped without meaning to and immediately felt her cheeks grow hot. What a stupid thing to get upset over.
Riff seemed to know that he'd messed up but not how. "I didn't mean to pry things out of you, Grazi. Sorry."
Grazi shook her head. "Don't worry about it. Not like you forced me." And he hadn't. Grazi hadn't opened up to anyone, not even Velma but she'd been all too eager to discuss her problems with Riff.
They grew quiet again. "You know," Grazi said, breaking the silence "this is the first time I've ever skipped school. Today, to come here."
"Shit, no kidding?" Riff looked shocked, like he genuinely couldn't fathom attending school if you had something better to do. "You really ain't skipped before?"
Grazi shook her head. "Nope. Never. New Grazi, remember?"
Riff chuckled. "You don't say. Was that your first smoke or something?" he asked, nodding to the pack of cigarette's they'd snatched from Tony's bag.
Grazi rolled her eyes. "You know it isn't. You've seen me smoke a million times by now. I ain't a baby, Riff."
"Did I say you were?" Riff held his hands up in surrender. "I just can't believe you've never skipped before."
"First time for everything." Grazi reached for another cigarette and lit this one herself, eager to show Riff that she knew what she was doing.
"Ever had a drink?" Riff asked.
Grazi blew out a puff of smoke. "A few times before but not enough to get really drunk. But I slept over at Velma's a few weeks ago and her sister bought us beer. Got a wicked hangover. Won't be doing that again anytime soon."
"Fair enough." Riff lit himself another cigarette. "Ever smoked reefer?"
Grazi smirked, then started to giggle.
Riff understood immediately. "That same night?" he asked, laughing. "Jesus. I gotta start hanging out at Velma's. Sounds like the place to be."
"It is!" Grazi agreed, still laughing. "She can't get rid of me."
Riff thought for a moment, taking a drag of his cigarette. As he exhaled, his eyes lit up."Got one! Ever shoplifted?"
Grazi shook her head. "Nope."
Riff studied her. "Never? Not even something little, a candy bar or anything like that?"
"Not that I can remember," Grazi said, enjoying the look of mock horror that came over Riff's face as she spoke. "Never stolen a damn thing. Unless you count Tony's cigs," she said, holding up the cigarette in her hand.
"You've never even, I don't know, snatched fruit from a stand on the street?" Riff had made his eyes so wide that they looked like they might pop out of his head.
"I told ya. I don't think I've ever stolen anything. Definitely not shoplifted."
A mischievous grin spread itself across Riff's face. "Well," he said. "I think we should change that."
